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they_o be_v such_o as_o christ_n blood_n nor_o god_n mercy_n belong_v to_o i_o 9.18_o god_n will_v have_v mercy_n on_o who_o he_o will_v have_v mercy_n and_o who_o he_o will_v he_o harden_v this_o be_v it_o that_o gnaw_v my_o heart_n he_o have_v harden_v i_o and_o i_o find_v that_o he_o daily_o more_o and_o more_o do_v harden_v i_o and_o therefore_o i_o be_o out_o of_o hope_n i_o feel_v it_o and_o therefore_o can_v but_o despair_v i_o tell_v you_o there_o be_v never_o such_o a_o monster_n as_o i_o be_o never_o be_v any_o man_n alive_a a_o spectacle_n of_o so_o exceed_a misery_n i_o know_v that_o justification_n be_v to_o be_v expect_v by_o christ_n and_o i_o deny_v and_o abjure_v it_o to_o the_o end_n i_o may_v keep_v this_o frail_a life_n from_o adversity_n and_o my_o child_n from_o poverty_n and_o now_o behold_v how_o bitter_a this_o life_n be_v to_o i_o and_o god_n only_o know_v what_o shall_v become_v of_o this_o my_o family_n but_o sure_o no_o good_a be_v likely_a to_o betide_v 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matter_n to_o deny_v christ_n and_o yet_o it_o be_v more_o ordinary_a then_o common_o man_n do_v conceive_v of_o it_o be_v not_o a_o denial_n make_v before_o a_o magistrate_n as_o it_o be_v with_o i_o for_o as_o often_o as_o a_o christian_n do_v dissemble_v the_o know_a truth_n as_o often_o as_o he_o approve_v of_o false_a worship_n by_o present_v himself_o at_o it_o so_o often_o as_o he_o have_v not_o thing_n worthy_a of_o his_o call_n or_o such_o thing_n as_o be_v unworthy_a of_o his_o call_n so_o often_o he_o deny_v christ_n thus_o do_v i_o and_o therefore_o be_o
say_v to_o he_o thou_o wicked_a wretch_n thou_o have_v deny_v i_o thou_o have_v renounce_v the_o covenant_n of_o thy_o obedience_n thou_o have_v break_v thy_o vow_n hence_o apostate_n bear_v with_o thou_o the_o sentence_n of_o thy_o eternal_a damnation_n he_o tremble_v and_o quake_v in_o body_n and_o mind_n fall_v down_o in_o a_o swoon_n relief_n be_v at_o hand_n for_o the_o body_n but_o from_o that_o time_n forward_o he_o never_o find_v any_o peace_n or_o ease_n of_o his_o mind_n but_o continue_v in_o uncessant_a torment_n he_o profess_v that_o he_o be_v captive_v under_o the_o revenge_a hand_n of_o the_o great_a god_n that_o he_o hear_v continual_o that_o fearful_a sentence_n of_o christ_n that_o just_a judge_n that_o he_o know_v he_o be_v utter_o undo_v that_o he_o can_v neither_o hope_v for_o grace_n nor_o christ_n intercession_n with_o god_n the_o father_n in_o his_o behalf_n thus_o be_v his_o fault_n ever_o heavy_a on_o his_o heart_n and_o ever_o his_o judgement_n before_o his_o 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this_o they_o endeavour_v to_o reform_v by_o purgation_n either_o to_o consume_v or_o at_o least_o to_o divert_v the_o course_n of_o those_o humour_n from_o the_o brain_n but_o all_o their_o skill_n effect_v nothing_o which_o spira_n note_v say_v alas_o poor_a man_n how_o far_o wide_a be_v you_o do_v you_o think_v that_o this_o disease_n be_v to_o be_v cure_v by_o potion_n believe_v i_o there_o must_v be_v another_o manner_n of_o medicine_n it_o be_v neither_o plaster_n nor_o drug_n that_o can_v help_v a_o faint_a soul_n cast_v down_o with_o sense_n of_o sin_n and_o the_o wrath_n of_o god_n to_o be_v only_a christ_n that_o must_v be_v the_o physician_n and_o the_o gospel_n the_o soul_n antidote_n the_o physician_n easy_o believe_v he_o after_o they_o have_v understand_v the_o whole_a truth_n of_o the_o matter_n and_o therefore_o they_o wish_v he_o to_o seek_v some_o spiritual_a comfort_n by_o this_o time_n the_o fame_n of_o this_o man_n be_v spread_v over_o all_o padua_n and_o the_o 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the_o strength_n of_o his_o experience_n and_o judgement_n in_o a_o burn_a heat_n call_v excessive_o for_o drink_v yet_o his_o understanding_n active_a quick_a of_o apprehension_n witty_a in_o discourse_n above_o his_o ordinary_a manner_n and_o judicious_o opposite_a his_o friend_n labour_v he_o by_o all_o fair_a mean_n to_o receive_v some_o nourishment_n which_o he_o obstinate_o gainsay_v they_o forcible_o infuse_v some_o liquid_a sustenance_n into_o his_o mouth_n most_o of_o which_o he_o spit_v out_o again_o exceed_o chafe_a and_o in_o this_o fret_a mood_n of_o his_o say_v as_o it_o be_v true_a that_o all_o thing_n work_v for_o the_o best_a to_o those_o that_o love_n god_n so_o to_o the_o wicked_a all_o be_v contrary_a for_o whereas_o a_o plentiful_a offspring_n be_v the_o blessing_n of_o god_n and_o his_o reward_n be_v a_o stay_n to_o the_o weak_a estate_n of_o their_o age_a parent_n to_o i_o they_o be_v a_o cause_n of_o bitterness_n and_o vexation_n they_o do_v strive_v to_o make_v i_o tire_v out_o this_o misery_n i_o will_v fain_o be_v at_o a_o end_n i_o deserve_v not_o this_o deal_n at_o their_o hand_n o_o that_o i_o be_v go_v from_o hence_o that_o somebody_o will_v let_v out_o this_o weary_a soul_n his_o friend_n salute_v he_o and_o ask_v he_o what_o he_o conceive_v to_o be_v the_o cause_n of_o his_o disease_n forthwith_o he_o break_v out_o into_o a_o lamentable_a discourse_n of_o the_o passage_n former_o relate_v and_o that_o with_o such_o passionate_a elocution_n that_o he_o cause_v many_o to_o weep_v and_o most_o to_o tremble_v they_o contrary_o to_o comfort_v he_o propound_v many_o of_o god_n promise_n record_v in_o the_o scripture_n and_o many_o example_n of_o god_n mercy_n my_o sin_n say_v he_o be_v great_a than_o the_o mercy_n of_o god_n nay_o answer_v they_o the_o mercy_n of_o god_n be_v above_o all_o sin_n god_n will_v have_v all_o man_n to_o be_v save_v it_o be_v true_a quoth_v he_o he_o will_v have_v all_o that_o he_o have_v elect_v to_o be_v save_v 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charge_v he_o that_o in_o any_o wife_n he_o do_v not_o violate_v the_o mercy_n of_o god_n to_o which_o he_o answer_v the_o mercy_n of_o god_n be_v exceed_o large_a and_o exend_n to_o all_o the_o elect_a but_o not_o to_o i_o or_o any_o like_o to_o i_o who_o be_v seal_v up_o to_o wrath_n i_o tell_v you_o i_o deserve_v it_o my_o own_o conscience_n condemn_v i_o what_o need_v any_o other_o judge_n christ_n come_v say_v they_o to_o take_v away_o sin_n and_o call_v for_o a_o book_n they_o read_v unto_o he_o the_o passion_n of_o christ_n and_o come_v to_o his_o nail_n to_o the_o cross_n spira_n say_v this_o indeed_o be_v comfortable_a to_o such_o as_o be_v elect_v but_o as_o for_o i_o wretch_n they_o be_v nothing_o but_o
have_v do_v he_o may_v have_v repent_v and_o christ_n will_v have_v receive_v he_o to_o mercy_n and_o yet_o he_o sin_v most_o grievous_o against_o his_o master_n which_o do_v so_o esteem_v of_o he_o as_o to_o honour_v he_o with_o the_o dignity_n of_o a_o apostle_n and_o do_v maintain_v and_o feed_v he_o he_o answer_v christ_n do_v also_o feed_v and_o honour_v i_o neither_o yet_o be_v my_o fault_n one_o jot_n less_o than_o that_o of_o he_o because_o it_o be_v not_o more_o honour_n to_o be_v personal_o present_a with_o christ_n in_o the_o flesh_n then_o to_o be_v in_o his_o presence_n now_o by_o illumination_n of_o his_o holy_a spirit_n and_o beside_o i_o deny_v that_o ever_o judas_n can_v have_v repent_v how_o long_o soever_o he_o have_v live_v for_o grace_n be_v quite_o take_v from_o he_o as_o it_o be_v now_o from_o i_o o_o spira_n say_v they_o you_o know_v you_o be_v in_o a_o spiritual_a desertion_n you_o must_v therefore_o not_o believe_v what_o satan_n suggest_v he_o be_v ever_o a_o liar_n from_o the_o beginning_n and_o a_o mere_a impostor_n and_o will_v cast_v a_o thousand_o lie_a fancy_n into_o your_o mind_n to_o beguile_v you_o withal_o you_o must_v rather_o believe_v those_o who_o you_o judge_v to_o be_v in_o a_o good_a estate_n and_o more_o able_a to_o discern_v of_o you_o then_o yourself_o believe_v we_o and_o we_o tell_v you_o that_o god_n will_v be_v merciful_a unto_o you_o o_o here_o be_v the_o knot_n say_v spira_n i_o will_v i_o can_v believe_v but_o i_o can_v then_o he_o begin_v to_o reckon_v up_o what_o fearful_a dream_n and_o vision_n he_o be_v continual_o trouble_v withal_o that_o he_o see_v the_o devil_n come_v flock_v into_o his_o chamber_n and_o about_o his_o bed_n terrify_v he_o with_o strange_a noise_n that_o these_o be_v not_o fancy_n but_o that_o he_o see_v they_o as_o real_o as_o the_o stander_n by_o and_o that_o beside_o these_o outward_a terror_n he_o feel_v continual_o a_o rack_a torture_n of_o his_o mind_n and_o a_o continual_a butchery_n 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be_v present_a repeat_v certain_a word_n out_o of_o the_o psalm_n if_o thy_o child_n forsake_v my_o law_n 89.30_o and_o walk_v not_o in_o my_o judgement_n i_o will_v visit_v their_o transgression_n with_o rod_n and_o their_o iniquity_n with_o stripe_n nevertheless_o my_o love_a kindness_n i_o will_v not_o utter_o take_v from_o they_o nor_o suffer_v my_o faithfulness_n to_o fail_v mark_v this_o o_o spira_n my_o covenant_n i_o will_v not_o break_v these_o promise_n say_v spira_n belong_v only_o to_o the_o elect_a which_o if_o tempt_v may_v fall_v into_o sin_n but_o be_v again_o lift_v up_o and_o recover_v out_o 37.24_o as_o the_o prophet_n say_v though_o he_o fall_v he_o shall_v not_o be_v utter_o cast_v down_o for_o the_o lord_n uphold_v he_o therefore_o peter_n can_v rise_v for_o he_o be_v elect_v but_o the_o reprobate_n when_o they_o fall_v can_v rise_v again_o as_o appear_v in_o cain_n saul_n and_o judas_n god_n deal_v one_o way_n with_o the_o elect_a and_o another_o way_n with_o reprobate_n the_o next_o day_n he_o pray_v with_o they_o in_o the_o latin_a tongue_n and_o that_o with_o excellent_a affection_n as_o outward_o appear_v bless_v be_v god_n say_v vergerius_n these_o be_v no_o sign_n of_o eternal_a reprobation_n you_o must_v not_o o_o spira_n seek_v out_o the_o secret_a counsel_n of_o god_n election_n and_o reprobation_n for_o no_o man_n can_v know_v so_o long_o as_o he_o live_v whether_o by_o his_o good_a or_o bad_a deed_n 88.14_o he_o be_v worthy_a of_o god_n love_n or_o anger_n do_v you_o not_o know_v that_o the_o prophet_n david_n complain_v that_o god_n have_v cast_v off_o his_o soul_n i_o know_v all_o this_o quoth_v spira_n i_o know_v the_o mercy_n of_o god_n be_v infinite_a and_o do_v surpass_v the_o sin_n of_o the_o whole_a world_n and_o that_o they_o be_v effectual_a to_o all_o that_o believe_v but_o this_o faith_n and_o this_o hope_n be_v the_o gift_n of_o god_n o_o that_o he_o will_v give_v it_o i_o but_o it_o be_v as_o impossible_a as_o to_o 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not_o only_o by_o creation_n but_o by_o regeneration_n i_o know_v he_o by_o his_o belove_a son_n the_o author_n and_o finisher_n of_o our_o salvation_n i_o can_v pray_v to_o he_o and_o hope_v for_o pardon_n of_o sin_n from_o he_o i_o have_v a_o taste_n of_o his_o sweetness_n peace_n and_o comfort_n now_o contrary_o i_o know_v god_n not_o as_o a_o father_n but_o as_o a_o enemy_n what_o more_o my_o heart_n hate_v god_n and_o seek_v to_o get_v above_o he_o i_o have_v nothing_o else_o to_o fly_v to_o but_o terror_n and_o despair_n belike_o you_o think_v then_o say_v they_o that_o those_o who_o have_v the_o earnest_n and_o first_o fruit_n of_o god_n spirit_n may_v notwithstanding_o fall_v away_o the_o judgement_n of_o god_n be_v a_o deep_a abiss_n say_v he_o we_o be_v soon_o drown_v if_o we_o enter_v into_o they_o 10.12_o he_o that_o think_v he_o stand_v let_v he_o take_v heed_n lest_o he_o fall_v as_o for_o myself_o i_o know_v i_o be_o fall_v back_o and_o that_o i_o once_o do_v know_v 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know_v that_o i_o want_v the_o gift_n of_o save_a grace_n and_o that_o i_o be_v utter_o undo_v 11.33_o god_n chasten_v his_o child_n with_o temporary_a affliction_n that_o they_o may_v come_v as_o gold_n out_o of_o the_o fire_n 12.28_o but_o punish_v the_o wicked_a with_o blindness_n in_o their_o understanding_n and_o hardness_n of_o heart_n and_o woe_n be_v to_o such_o 18.42_o from_o who_o god_n take_v his_o holy_a spirit_n here_o one_o rebuke_v he_o and_o tell_v he_o he_o give_v too_o much_o credit_n to_o sense_n that_o he_o be_v not_o to_o believe_v himself_o but_o rather_o he_o that_o be_v in_o a_o good_a state_n and_o i_o testify_v to_o you_o
say_v he_o that_o god_n will_v be_v merciful_a to_o you_o nay_o answer_v he_o for_o because_o i_o be_o in_o this_o ill_a estate_n therefore_o can_v i_o believe_v nothing_o but_o what_o be_v contrary_a to_o my_o salvation_n and_o comfort_n but_o you_o that_o be_v so_o confident_a of_o your_o good_a estate_n look_v that_o it_o be_v true_a for_o it_o be_v no_o such_o small_a matter_n to_o be_v assure_v of_o sincerity_n a_o man_n have_v need_n be_v exceed_o strong_o ground_v in_o the_o truth_n before_o he_o can_v be_v able_a to_o affirm_v such_o a_o matter_n as_o you_o now_o do_v it_o be_v not_o the_o performance_n of_o a_o few_o outward_a duty_n but_o a_o mighty_a constant_a labour_n with_o all_o intention_n of_o heart_n and_o affection_n with_o full_a desire_n and_o endeavour_v continual_o to_o set_v forth_o god_n glory_n there_o must_v be_v neither_o fear_n of_o legate_n inquisitor_n prison_n nor_o any_o death_n whatsoever_o many_o think_v themselves_o happy_a that_o be_v not_o it_o 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leave_v i_o to_o thh_v power_n of_o the_o devil_n but_o such_o they_o be_v be_v be_v not_o to_o be_v find_v in_o your_o litany_n neither_o will_v they_o be_v cast_v out_o by_o spell_n the_o priest_n proceed_v in_o his_o intend_a purpose_n with_o a_o strange_a uncouth_a gesture_n and_o a_o loud_a voice_n adjure_v the_o spirit_n to_o come_v into_o spira_n tongue_n and_o to_o answer_v spira_n deride_v his_o fruitless_a labour_n with_o a_o sigh_n turn_v from_o he_o a_o bishop_n be_v there_o present_a say_v to_o spira_n brother_n god_n have_v put_v virtue_n into_o the_o word_n and_o sacrament_n and_o we_o have_v use_v the_o one_o mean_n and_o find_v not_o that_o effect_n which_o we_o desire_v shall_v we_o try_v the_o efficacy_n of_o the_o sacrament_n sure_o if_o you_o take_v it_o as_o a_o true_a christian_n ought_v to_o receive_v the_o body_n and_o blood_n of_o christ_n it_o will_v prove_v a_o sovereign_a medicine_n for_o your_o sick_a soul_n this_o i_o can_v do_v answer_v he_o for_o they_o that_o have_v no_o right_a to_o the_o promise_n have_v no_o right_a to_o the_o seal_n 11.33_o the_o euâ—harist_n be_v appoint_v only_o for_o believer_n if_o we_o have_v not_o faith_n we_o eat_v and_o drink_v judgement_n to_o ourselves_o i_o receive_v it_o about_o a_o month_n since_o but_o i_o do_v not_o well_o in_o so_o do_v for_o i_o take_v it_o by_o constraint_n and_o so_o i_o take_v it_o to_o my_o deep_a condemnation_n here_o vergerius_n begin_v to_o importune_v he_o earnest_o to_o beware_v that_o he_o do_v not_o wilful_o resist_v grace_n and_o put_v himself_o out_o of_o heaven_n charge_v he_o vehement_o by_o all_o the_o love_n that_o be_v between_o they_o by_o the_o love_n which_o he_o bear_v to_o his_o child_n yea_o to_o his_o own_o soul_n that_o he_o will_v set_v himself_o serious_o to_o return_v to_o that_o faith_n and_o hope_n which_o once_o he_o have_v in_o the_o death_n of_o christ_n with_o many_o such_o like_a word_n spira_n have_v hear_v much_o of_o the_o like_a matter_n former_o and_o be_v somewhat_o move_v say_a you_o do_v but_o repeat_v vergerius_n what_o shall_v i_o hope_v why_o shall_v i_o believe_v god_n have_v take_v faith_n from_o i_o show_v i_o then_o whither_o i_o shall_v go_v show_v i_o a_o haven_n whereto_o i_o shall_v retire_v you_o tell_v i_o of_o god_n mercy_n when_o as_o god_n have_v cast_v i_o off_o you_o tell_v i_o of_o christ_n intersession_n i_o have_v deny_v he_o you_o command_v i_o to_o believe_v i_o say_v i_o can_v you_o bring_v i_o no_o comfort_n your_o command_n be_v as_o impossible_a for_o i_o to_o obâ—y_n as_o to_o kâ—ep_v the_o moral_a law_n if_o you_o shall_v persuade_v one_o to_o love_n god_n with_o all_o his_o heart_n soul_n and_o strength_n and_o god_n give_v he_o not_o the_o power_n can_v he_o perform_v your_o desire_n do_v not_o the_o church_n teach_v we_o to_o sing_v direct_v we_o o_o lord_n to_o love_v thy_o commandment_n hypocrite_n say_v that_o they_o love_v god_n with_o all_o their_o heart_n but_o they_o lie_v for_o my_o part_n i_o will_v not_o lie_v but_o tell_v you_o plain_o such_o be_v my_o case_n that_o though_o you_o shall_v never_o so_o much_o importune_v i_o to_o hope_n or_o believe_v though_o i_o desire_v it_o yet_o i_o can_v for_o god_n as_o a_o punishment_n of_o my_o wickedness_n have_v take_v away_o from_o i_o all_o his_o save_a grace_n faith_n hope_n and_o all_o i_o be_o not_o the_o man_n therefore_o that_o you_o take_v i_o for_o belike_o you_o think_v i_o delight_v in_o this_o estate_n if_o i_o can_v conceive_v but_o the_o least_o spark_n of_o hope_n of_o a_o better_a estate_n hereafter_o i_o will_v not_o refuse_v to_o endure_v the_o most_o heauâ—e_n wâ—ight_n of_o the_o wrath_n of_o that_o great_a god_n yea_o for_o twenty_o thousand_o year_n so_o that_o i_o may_v at_o length_n attain_v to_o the_o end_n of_o that_o misery_n which_o i_o now_o know_v will_v be_v eternal_a but_o i_o tell_v you_o my_o will_n be_v wound_v who_o long_v more_o to_o believe_v than_o i_o do_v but_o all_o the_o groundwork_n of_o my_o hope_n be_v quite_o go_v for_o if_o the_o testimony_n of_o holy_a scripture_n be_v true_a as_o they_o be_v most_o certain_o true_a be_v not_o this_o as_o true_a whosoever_o deny_v i_o before_o man_n he_o say_v christ_n will_v i_o deny_v before_o my_o father_n which_o be_v in_o heaven_n be_v not_o this_o proper_o my_o case_n as_o if_o it_o have_v purposely_o be_v intend_v against_o this_o very_a person_n of_o i_o and_o i_o pray_v you_o what_o shall_v become_v of_o such_o as_o christ_n deny_v see_v there_o be_v no_o other_o name_n under_o heaven_n whereby_o you_o look_v to_o be_v save_v what_o say_v saint_n paul_n to_o the_o hebrew_n it_o be_v impossible_a for_o those_o who_o be_v once_o enlighten_v 6._o and_o have_v taste_v of_o the_o heavenly_a gift_n and_o be_v make_v partaker_n of_o the_o holy_a ghost_n if_o they_o fall_v away_o to_o be_v renew_v to_o repentance_n what_o can_v be_v more_o plain_a against_o i_o be_v not_o that_o scripture_n also_o 10.26_o if_o we_o sin_v wilfullly_n after_o we_o have_v receive_v the_o knowledge_n of_o the_o truth_n there_o remain_v no_o more_o sacrifice_n for_o sin_n but_o a_o certain_a look_n for_o of_o judgement_n the_o scripture_n speak_v of_o i_o saint_n paul_n meâ—hes_n i_o 2.21_o saint_n peter_n tell_v i_o it_o have_v be_v better_a i_o have_v not_o know_v the_o way_n of_o righteousness_n then_o after_o i_o have_v know_v to_o turn_v from_o the_o holy_a commandment_n it_o have_v be_v better_a i_o have_v not_o know_v and_o yet_o then_o my_o condemnation_n have_v be_v most_o certain_a do_v you_o not_o see_v evident_o that_o i_o have_v wâ—lfully_o deny_v the_o know_a truth_n may_v just_o expect_v not_o only_o damnation_n but_o worse_o if_o worse_a may_v be_v imagine_v god_n will_v have_v i_o undergo_v the_o just_a punishment_n of_o my_o sin_n and_o make_v i_o a_o example_n of_o his_o wrath_n for_o your_o sake_n the_o company_n present_a admire_v his_o discourse_n so_o grievous_o accuse_v himself_o of_o his_o forepast_a life_n so_o grave_o and_o wise_o dilate_v concerning_o the_o judgement_n of_o god_n that_o they_o then_o be_v convince_v that_o it_o be_v not_o frenzy_n or_o madness_n that_o have_v possess_v he_o and_o be_v as_o it_o be_v in_o admiration_n of_o his_o estate_n spira_n proceed_v again_o in_o this_o manner_n take_v heed_n to_o yourselves_o it_o be_v no_o light_n or_o easy_a matter_n to_o be_v a_o christian_a it_o be_v not_o baptism_n or_o read_v of_o the_o scripture_n or_o boast_v of_o faith_n in_o christ_n though_o even_o these_o be_v good_a that_o can_v prove_v one_o to_o be_v a_o absolute_a christian_a you_o know_v what_o i_o say_v