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my_o very_a soul_n even_o to_o say_v thus_o much_o because_o i_o know_v and_o feel_v that_o the_o fault_n thereof_o be_v whole_o i_o for_o as_o for_o thou_o i_o find_v clear_o enough_o that_o there_o want_v nothing_o at_o all_o on_o thy_o part_n to_o secure_v i_o for_o be_v total_o thou_o own_o even_o from_o that_o tender_a age_n of_o i_o and_o if_o i_o will_v be_v content_a to_o seek_v some_o colour_n to_o complain_v of_o my_o parent_n with_o as_o little_a reason_n also_o can_v i_o do_v that_o since_o i_o can_v never_o discover_v any_o thing_n in_o
also_o with_o have_v begin_v so_o to_o use_v prayer_n as_o that_o i_o may_v be_v able_a to_o carry_v my_o pain_n with_o much_o conformity_n to_o his_o holy_a will_n the_o conversation_n of_o my_o hart_n be_v whole_o with_o he_o and_o i_o carry_v these_o word_n of_o job_n very_o usual_o both_o in_o my_o thought_n and_o in_o my_o mouth_n since_o we_o have_v receive_v blessing_n and_o benefit_n at_o the_o hand_n of_o our_o lord_n why_o shall_v we_o not_o also_o suffer_v affliction_n and_o i_o conceive_v that_o this_o help_v to_o give_v i_o courage_n at_o length_n come_v the_o feast_n of_o our_o b._n lady_n in_o august_n for_o till_o then_o from_o the_o april_n before_o have_v my_o torment_n continue_v though_o yet_o it_o have_v be_v great_a in_o the_o three_o last_o month_n i_o than_o make_v haste_n to_o go_v to_o confession_n for_o i_o ever_o take_v much_o contentment_n to_o confess_v often_o my_o friend_n think_v that_o it_o be_v fear_n of_o death_n which_o invite_v i_o to_o be_v so_o devout_a and_o so_o to_o the_o end_n that_o i_o may_v not_o be_v put_v into_o apprehension_n my_o father_n will_v not_o let_v i_o confess_v o_o inordinate_a and_o irregular_a love_n of_o flesh_n and_o blood_n since_o though_o i_o have_v so_o catholic_n a_o father_n and_o so_o full_a of_o prudence_n and_o consideration_n in_o all_o his_o action_n which_o even_o abound_v in_o he_o for_o this_o can_v not_o be_v a_o effect_n of_o ignorance_n yet_o he_o may_v have_v do_v i_o hurt_n enough_o by_o this_o mean_n that_o night_n i_o fall_v into_o such_o a_o trance_n as_o continue_v to_o keep_v i_o near_o four_o day_n without_o the_o use_n almost_o of_o any_o of_o my_o sense_n and_o short_o they_o come_v to_o give_v i_o the_o sacrament_n of_o extreme_a unction_n and_o every_o hour_n or_o rather_o every_o moment_n it_o be_v expect_v when_o i_o shall_v expire_v they_o be_v as_o diligent_a in_o say_v the_o creed_n devil_n in_o my_o hear_n as_o if_o i_o have_v understand_v they_o yea_o sometime_o they_o hold_v i_o for_o so_o certain_o to_o be_v dead_a that_o afterward_o i_o find_v the_o drop_n of_o the_o holy_a candle_n wax-candle_n about_o my_o eye_n the_o affliction_n of_o my_o father_n be_v great_a for_o his_o not_o have_v permit_v i_o to_o go_v to_o confession_n many_o outcry_n and_o many_o prayer_n be_v make_v to_o almighty_a god_n for_o i_o and_o bless_v be_v he_o who_o be_v please_v to_o hear_v they_o for_o the_o grave_n remain_v open_a in_o the_o church_n of_o my_o monastery_n a_o day_n and_o a_o half_a where_o my_o body_n be_v expect_v to_o be_v inter_v and_o my_o funeral_n have_v be_v already_o celebrate_v by_o the_o religious_a man_n of_o our_o order_n in_o another_o town_n where_o it_o be_v conceive_v that_o i_o be_v dead_a our_o lord_n be_v yet_o please_v at_o length_n that_o i_o shall_v teturne_v to_o myself_o and_o so_o instant_o i_o will_v needs_o go_v to_o confession_n i_o receive_v also_o the_o b._n sacrament_n with_o many_o tear_n though_o yet_o in_o my_o opinion_n they_o be_v not_o shed_v with_o that_o sense_n and_o grief_n for_o only_o my_o have_v offend_v almighty_a god_n which_o may_v have_v serve_v to_o save_v my_o soul_n if_o the_o error_n into_o which_o i_o be_v bring_v by_o they_o who_o have_v tell_v i_o that_o they_o be_v not_o matter_n of_o mortal_a sin_n which_o afterward_o i_o see_v plain_o that_o they_o be_v may_v not_o serve_v my_o turn_n for_o the_o torment_n wherewith_o i_o remain_v be_v intolerable_a and_o my_o understanding_n not_o very_o sharp_a but_o rather_o dull_a though_o yet_o as_o i_o conceive_v my_o confession_n be_v entire_a of_o all_o thing_n whereby_o i_o may_v think_v that_o i_o have_v offend_v god_n for_o this_o mercy_n do_v his_o divine_a majesty_n vouchsafe_v to_o allow_v i_o among_o other_o that_o after_o i_o have_v once_o begin_v to_o receive_v the_o b._n sacrament_n i_o never_o omit_v to_o confess_v any_o thing_n which_o i_o conceive_v to_o be_v a_o sin_n though_o it_o be_v but_o venial_a though_o yet_o still_o i_o think_v that_o without_o doubt_n my_o soul_n may_v have_v run_v hazard_n not_o to_o be_v save_v if_o i_o have_v die_v then_o in_o regard_n that_o on_o the_o one_o side_n my_o ghostly_a father_n have_v be_v so_o mean_o learn_v and_o on_o the_o other_o side_n and_o indeed_o on_o many_o side_n in_o regard_n that_o in_o myself_o i_o be_v so_o wicked_a but_o this_o be_v always_o a_o most_o certain_a truth_n that_o when_o i_o return_v to_o a_o thought_n of_o this_o passage_n and_o consider_v how_o it_o seem_v as_o if_o our_o lord_n have_v raise_v i_o again_o from_o death_n to_o life_n i_o be_o fill_v with_o so_o huge_a a_o amazement_n that_o i_o remain_v even_o as_o it_o be_v all_o quake_a within_o myself_o and_o now_o i_o think_v it_o be_v well_o o_o my_o soul_n that_o thou_o will_v gather_v this_o just_a resolution_n from_o that_o great_a danger_n out_o of_o which_o it_o please_v our_o lord_n to_o deliver_v thou_o that_o although_o thou_o will_v not_o fly_v from_o offend_v his_o divine_a majesty_n for_o love_n yet_o at_o least_o thou_o shall_v forbear_v to_o do_v it_o for_o fear_n for_o he_o may_v have_v take_v thy_o life_n from_o thou_o a_o thousand_o time_n when_o thou_o be_v in_o a_o more_o dangerous_a state_n and_o i_o think_v that_o i_o shall_v not_o say_v too_o much_o if_o i_o do_v speak_v of_o a_o thousand_o time_n more_o though_o he_o perhaps_o may_v chide_v i_o who_o command_v i_o to_o use_v moderation_n in_o the_o recital_n of_o my_o sin_n and_o yet_o i_o doubt_v that_o i_o have_v paint_v they_o out_o too_o favourable_o and_o fair_a but_o i_o beg_v of_o he_o for_o the_o love_n of_o our_o lord_n that_o he_o will_v not_o once_o think_v of_o make_v i_o diminish_v my_o fault_n because_o the_o magnificence_n of_o almighty_a god_n be_v to_o be_v discern_v thereby_o and_o how_o much_o he_o be_v please_v to_o suffer_v and_o endure_v from_o a_o soul_n let_v he_o be_v bless_v for_o ever_o and_o let_v it_o also_o please_v his_o divine_a majesty_n that_o he_o may_v rather_o consume_v i_o quite_o then_o that_o i_o shall_v ever_o leave_v to_o love_v he_o more_o the_o six_o chapter_n she_o treat_v of_o how_o much_o she_o owe_v our_o b._n lord_n for_o his_o give_v she_o conformity_n to_o his_o holy_a will_n in_o so_o great_a affliction_n and_o how_o she_o take_v the_o glorious_a s._n joseph_n for_o her_o intercessor_n and_o how_o advantageous_a that_o devotion_n prove_v to_o be_v i_o remain_v during_o those_o four_o day_n of_o agony_n or_o trance_n in_o such_o state_n that_o only_o our_o b._n lord_n be_v able_a to_o know_v the_o unsufferable_a torment_n which_o i_o feel_v in_o myself_o my_o tongue_n be_v deep_o bite_v by_o i_o in_o many_o place_n my_o throat_n with_o have_v take_v nothing_o and_o by_o reason_n also_o of_o my_o very_a great_a weakness_n can_v not_o swallow_v so_o much_o as_o a_o drop_n of_o water_n without_o choke_v i_o thought_n i_o be_v total_o disjoint_v and_o my_o head_n in_o extreme_a disorder_n i_o be_v also_o as_o it_o be_v all_o roll_a up_o and_o contract_v as_o if_o i_o have_v be_v a_o bottom_n of_o packthridd_n for_o in_o this_o do_v the_o torment_n of_o those_o day_n fix_v themselves_o without_o my_o be_v able_a once_o to_o stir_v either_o hand_n or_o foot_n arm_n or_o head_n unless_o they_o move_v i_o any_o more_o then_o as_o if_o i_o have_v be_v dead_a only_o i_o think_v i_o be_v able_a to_o wag_n one_o single_v finger_fw-la of_o my_o right_a hand_n now_o for_o any_o body_n to_o touch_v i_o in_o any_o kind_n there_o be_v no_o mean_n at_o all_o for_o my_o whole_a person_n be_v so_o affect_v and_o afflict_a as_o that_o there_o be_v no_o endure_v to_o have_v it_o touch_v in_o a_o sheet_n they_o will_v be_v remove_v i_o now_o and_o then_o according_a to_o the_o occasion_n with_o one_o at_o one_o end_n thereof_o &_o another_o at_o the_o other_o and_o this_o last_v till_o easter_n only_o this_o i_o have_v by_o way_n of_o ease_n that_o if_o i_o be_v not_o approach_v and_o touch_v these_o torment_n will_v be_v cease_v many_o time_n and_o then_o upon_o the_o account_n of_o my_o be_v in_o less_o pain_n i_o be_v content_a to_o affirm_v myself_o to_o be_v well_o but_o indeed_o i_o be_v much_o afraid_a lest_o my_o patience_n shall_v begin_v to_o fail_v i_o and_o therefore_o i_o be_v not_o a_o little_a please_v to_o find_v myself_o without_o those_o sharp_a and_o continual_a torment_n though_o yet_o i_o have_v they_o after_o a_o unsupportable_a manner_n together_o with_o a_o very_a great_a detestation_n of_o food_n whilst_o i_o have_v those_o fierce_a cold_n which_o indeed_o
a_o firm_a foundation_n so_o that_o the_o true_a love_n of_o god_n consist_v not_o in_o have_v tear_n or_o tenderness_n or_o spiritual_a gust_n which_o we_o be_v wont_n for_o the_o most_o part_n to_o desire_v and_o to_o take_v comfort_n in_o but_o to_o serve_v his_o divine_a majesty_n with_o word_n justice_n and_o fortitude_n and_o humility_n for_o in_o that_o other_o course_n i_o think_v we_o be_v rather_o on_o the_o take_a hand_n then_o on_o the_o give_n any_o thing_n of_o our_o own_o as_o for_o poor_a weak_a silly_a woman_n and_o who_o be_v of_o little_a courage_n like_v i_o i_o think_v i_o can_v find_v it_o fit_a that_o our_o lord_n shall_v carry_v they_o on_o with_o regalo_n that_o so_o they_o may_v be_v the_o better_o induce_v to_o suffer_v those_o affliction_n which_o it_o have_v please_v his_o divine_a majesty_n that_o they_o shall_v bear_v but_o for_o the_o true_a servant_n of_o god_n man_n of_o substance_n and_o solid_a way_n man_n of_o learning_n and_o understanding_n to_o make_v so_o much_o reflection_n upon_o god_n be_v not_o give_v they_o tenderness_n of_o devotion_n as_o i_o see_v they_o do_v i_o confess_v it_o give_v i_o disgust_v even_o to_o hear_v it_o i_o say_v not_o but_o that_o they_o shall_v receive_v these_o spiritual_a delight_n when_o god_n give_v they_o yea_o and_o that_o they_o shall_v esteem_v they_o very_o much_o because_o in_o that_o case_n his_o divine_a majesty_n will_v have_v see_v that_o they_o be_v convenient_a for_o they_o but_o only_o that_o when_o they_o have_v they_o not_o they_o shall_v not_o vex_v themselves_o and_o that_o they_o shall_v also_o understand_v that_o when_o god_n give_v they_o not_o they_o be_v not_o convenient_a for_o they_o but_o that_o they_o ought_v to_o be_v and_o remain_v the_o lord_n of_o themselves_o in_o all_o thing_n let_v they_o believe_v that_o this_o be_v a_o defect_n and_o fault_n in_o they_o for_o i_o have_v see_v and_o try_v it_o let_v they_o believe_v that_o this_o be_v a_o imperfection_n and_o that_o it_o be_v not_o to_o walk_v on_o with_o liberty_n of_o spirit_n but_o rather_o like_o weak_a and_o cowardly_a people_n who_o dare_v not_o set_v upon_o difficulty_n and_o i_o say_v not_o this_o so_o much_o for_o they_o who_o be_v but_o beginner_n though_o yet_o i_o press_v it_o so_o far_o because_o it_o import_v very_o much_o that_o they_o begin_v with_o this_o liberty_n of_o spirit_n and_o resolution_n but_o even_o for_o other_o also_o for_o there_o be_v many_o who_o have_v already_o begin_v and_o yet_o who_o never_o in_o fine_a resolve_v upon_o do_v herein_o home_n what_o they_o ought_v and_o i_o believe_v that_o this_o proceed_v in_o great_a part_n from_o their_o not_o resolve_v to_o take_v up_o and_o carry_v this_o cross_n from_o the_o very_a beginning_n for_o such_o shall_v go_v on_o still_o afflict_v as_o conceave_a that_o all_o that_o be_v nothing_o which_o they_o do_v because_o when_o the_o understanding_n gives-ove_a to_o work_v and_o act_n they_o use_v not_o to_o be_v able_a to_o endure_v it_o and_o yet_o perhaps_o they_o will_v grow_v even_o fat_a and_o strong_a at_o the_o very_a self_n same_o time_n though_o themselves_o understand_v it_o not_o to_o be_v so_o we_o be_v to_o think_v and_o know_v that_o our_o lord_n do_v not_o consider_v and_o care_n for_o these_o thing_n for_o howsoever_o ourselves_o may_v think_v that_o they_o be_v fault_n yet_o they_o be_v not_o so_o indeed_o and_o his_o divine_a majesty_n know_v our_o misery_n and_o base_a condition_n much_o better_o than_o ourselves_o and_o consider_v that_o these_o soul_n desire_v to_o be_v think_v always_o upon_o he_o and_o that_o they_o desire_v to_o love_v he_o and_o this_o be_v that_o firm_a purpose_n which_o he_o value_v and_o expect_v at_o our_o hand_n but_o that_o other_o be_v but_o a_o affliction_n which_o we_o bring_v upon_o ourselves_o for_o it_o serve_v but_o to_o disquiet_v the_o soul_n and_o to_o give_v occasion_n that_o if_o before_o it_o be_v unable_a to_o take_v any_o benefit_n by_o serve_v god_n for_o one_o hour_n it_o may_v now_o be_v so_o for_o four_o and_o many_o time_n for_o i_o have_v very_o great_a experience_n of_o this_o case_n and_o know_v it_o to_o be_v true_a because_o i_o have_v both_o consider_v it_o with_o care_n and_o have_v also_o treat_v about_o it_o with_o spiritual_a person_n this_o grow_v even_o from_o our_o corporal_a indisposition_n for_o we_o be_v so_o very_o total_o infirm_a that_o this_o poor_a little_a wretched_a soul_n of_o we_o participate_v in_o the_o misery_n of_o the_o body_n and_o even_o the_o alteration_n of_o the_o weather_n and_o the_o revolution_n of_o their_o own_o natural_a humour_n be_v many_o time_n the_o occasion_n why_o without_o even_o any_o fault_n of_o their_o own_o they_o can_v well_o do_v even_o what_o they_o will_v but_o be_v fain_o to_o suffer_v thus_o in_o all_o kind_n and_o when_o they_o strive_v to_o force_v themselves_o in_o these_o coniuncture_n of_o time_n it_o prove_v to_o be_v so_o much_o the_o worse_o with_o they_o and_o the_o inconvenience_n will_v last_v so_o much_o the_o long_o but_o discretion_n must_v be_v use_v herein_o to_o weigh_v when_o this_o effect_n proceed_v from_o this_o cause_n and_o they_o must_v not_o oppress_v and_o stifle_v this_o poor_a soul_n but_o understand_v and_o consider_v that_o it_o be_v sick_a let_v the_o hour_n of_o prayer_n in_o god_n name_n be_v change_v yea_o and_o many_o time_n it_o will_v be_v fit_a to_o do_v so_o for_o some_o day_n and_o let_v they_o pass_v through_o this_o bannishment_n of_o they_o as_o well_o as_o they_o can_v since_o it_o be_v misfortune_n and_o misery_n enough_o for_o a_o soul_n which_o do_v indeed_o love_v almighty_a god_n to_o see_v that_o she_o live_v in_o so_o great_a misery_n and_o that_o she_o be_v no_o way_n able_a to_o do_v even_o what_o herself_o desire_v in_o regard_n that_o she_o be_v lodge_v with_o so_o untoward_a and_o ill_o a_o host_n as_o this_o body_n be_v i_o say_v this_o be_v to_o be_v do_v with_o discretion_n because_o sometime_o the_o devil_n will_v be_v a_o cause_n of_o these_o thing_n and_o therefore_o it_o be_v good_a neither_o always_o to_o leave_v the_o usual_a &_o set_a time_n of_o prayer_n whensoever_o there_o may_v be_v great_a disturbance_n and_o distraction_n in_o the_o understanding_n nor_o yet_o always_o to_o stand_v torment_v the_o soul_n towards_o the_o make_n it_o do_v more_o than_o it_o can_v there_o be_v also_o other_o exterior_a work_n of_o charity_n &_o of_o read_v also_o which_o may_v be_v use_v though_o yet_o sometime_o the_o soul_n will_v not_o be_v so_o much_o as_o fit_a even_o for_o that_o but_o in_o that_o case_n let_v the_o mind_n be_v even_o subject_a as_o it_o be_v to_o the_o body_n for_o the_o love_n of_o almighty_a god_n since_o many_o other_o time_n the_o body_n serve_v the_o soul_n and_o let_v the_o party_n in_o such_o case_n take_v the_o entertainment_n and_o pastime_n of_o conversation_n with_o other_o so_o that_o it_o be_v holy_a or_o divert_v himself_o with_o go_v a_o little_a abroad_o to_o take_v the_o air_n as_o the_o ghostly_a father_n shall_v advise_v for_o experience_n be_v a_o great_a schoolmistress_n in_o all_o thing_n towards_o the_o give_v any_o one_o to_o understand_v what_o may_v be_v fit_a and_o almighty_a god_n be_v serve_v in_o all_o this_o business_n for_o his_o yoke_n be_v sweet_a and_o it_o be_v a_o thing_n of_o much_o importance_n that_o the_o soul_n be_v not_o servile_o drag_v as_o one_o may_v say_v but_o that_o it_o be_v carry_v sweet_o on_o towards_o the_o receive_n of_o more_o benefit_n and_o profit_n so_o that_o i_o advise_v again_o and_o again_o for_o though_o i_o say_v it_o often_o it_o will_v do_v no_o hurt_n because_o the_o matter_n import_v so_o much_o that_o no_o body_n be_v to_o afflict_v nor_o oppress_v himself_o either_o through_o dryness_n or_o disquiet_v or_o distraction_n of_o thought_n nor_o yet_o to_o go_v up_o and_o down_o with_o any_o such_o kind_n of_o tribulation_n if_o they_o pretend_v to_o gain_v liberty_n of_o spirit_n but_o let_v he_o once_o begin_v not_o to_o be_v in_o such_o a_o fright_n upon_o the_o sight_n of_o the_o cross_n and_o he_o shall_v see_v how_o our_o bless_a lord_n will_v help_v he_o to_o bear_v it_o and_o what_o contentment_n he_o will_v grow_v to_o have_v and_o how_o he_o will_v be_v able_a to_o make_v his_o profit_n of_o all_o thing_n for_o already_o we_o may_v sufficient_o perceive_v that_o if_o there_o be_v no_o spring_n of_o water_n in_o the_o well_o we_o know_v not_o how_o to_o put_v any_o there_o true_a it_o be_v that_o we_o must_v by_o no_o mean_n be_v negligent_a and_o careless_a but_o endeavour_v to_o draw_v it_o out_o if_o there_o be_v
any_o because_o then_o our_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o multiply_v our_o virtue_n by_o that_o mean_n the_o twelve_o chapter_n she_o prosecute_v her_o discourse_n of_o the_o first_o state_n or_o degree_n of_o prayer_n and_o declare_v how_o far_o we_o may_v arrive_v of_o ourselves_o by_o the_o favour_n of_o our_o lord_n and_o of_o the_o hurt_n it_o bring_v to_o desire_v that_o our_o spirit_n may_v rise_v to_o supernatural_a and_o extraordinary_a thing_n till_o our_o lord_n himself_o be_v please_v to_o ordain_v it_o that_o which_o i_o pretend_v to_o give_v to_o be_v understand_v in_o the_o last_o chapter_n though_o yet_o i_o divert_v myself_o much_o upon_o other_o thing_n in_o regard_n that_o i_o think_v they_o very_o necessary_a be_v to_o declare_v how_o much_o we_o may_v be_v able_a to_o acquire_v and_o how_o in_o this_o first_o part_n of_o our_o devotion_n we_o may_v to_o some_o proportion_n help_v ourselves_o because_o the_o consider_v and_o ruminate_v upon_o that_o which_o our_o lord_n suffer_v for_o we_o be_v wont_a to_o move_v we_o to_o compassion_n and_o the_o sorrow_n and_o tear_n which_o grow_v from_o thence_o be_v a_o very_a savoury_a and_o delightful_a kind_n of_o thing_n and_o so_o to_o think_v of_o the_o glory_n for_o which_o we_o hope_v and_o of_o the_o love_n which_o our_o lord_n bear_v we_o as_o also_o of_o his_o resurrection_n move_v we_o to_o joy_n which_o be_v neither_o whole_o spiritual_a nor_o whole_o sensual_a but_o this_o be_v a_o virtuous_a kind_n of_o joy_n on_o the_o one_o side_n as_o on_o the_o other_o that_o former_a pain_n be_v very_o meritorious_a and_o of_o this_o sort_n be_v all_o those_o thing_n which_o cause_n any_o such_o devotion_n as_o be_v acquire_v in_o part_n by_o the_o understanding_n though_o yet_o there_o be_v no_o merit_n nor_o gain_v therein_o unless_o almighty_a god_n be_v please_v to_o give_v it_o but_o now_o it_o will_v be_v very_o fit_a for_o a_o soul_n which_o our_o lord_n have_v not_o raise_v any_o high_a not_o to_o procure_v to_o exalt_v herself_o and_o let_v this_o be_v very_o well_o note_v for_o the_o contrary_a course_n will_v help_v she_o to_o nothing_o but_o loss_n in_o this_o degree_n or_o state_n she_o may_v perform_v many_o good_a act_n by_o way_n of_o resolve_v to_o do_v great_a thing_n for_o almighty_a god_n and_o to_o awake_v and_o stirr-up_a her_o love_n and_o other_o also_o by_o way_n of_o assist_v herself_o to_o grow-up_a in_o several_a virtue_n according_a to_o what_o be_v contain_v in_o a_o certain_a book_n call_v the_o art_n of_o serve_v god_n which_o be_v a_o very_a good_a one_o and_o very_o proper_a for_o such_o as_o find_v themselves_o in_o this_o state_n because_o the_o understanding_n do_v act_n and_o exercise_v itself_o here_o she_o may_v also_o represent_v herself_o as_o in_o the_o presence_n of_o christ_n our_o lord_n and_o accustom_v herself_o to_o be_v great_o enamour_v with_o his_o most_o sacred_a humanity_n and_o to_o be_v ever_o carry_v that_o along_o in_o her_o company_n and_o to_o be_v often_o speak_v to_o it_o and_o to_o beg_v his_o continual_a assistance_n in_o all_o her_o necessity_n and_o even_o to_o complain_v to_o he_o of_o her_o affliction_n and_o to_o joy_v with_o he_o for_o her_o contentment_n and_o gust_n but_o yet_o not_o to_o forget_v he_o upon_o occasion_n thereof_o and_o all_o this_o without_o procure_v to_o express_v herself_o in_o any_o set_v kind_a of_o prayer_n but_o to_o make_v use_n of_o such_o word_n alone_o as_o may_v have_v conformity_n with_o her_o own_o necessity_n and_o desire_n this_o be_v a_o note_n excellent_a way_n of_o find_v profit_n and_o that_o in_o a_o very_a short_a time_n and_o whosoever_o shall_v earnest_o labour_v to_o carry_v this_o precious_a company_n with_o himself_o and_o shall_v have_v proceed_v well_o therein_o and_o shall_v have_v find_v the_o way_n of_o love_a in_o very_o good_a earnest_n this_o lord_n of_o we_o to_o who_o we_o owe_v so_o much_o i_o will_v give_v and_o pass_v my_o word_n that_o this_o person_n be_v a_o very_a good_a proficient_a for_o this_o purpose_n let_v it_o not_o trouble_v we_o a_o whitt_n not_o to_o find_v ourselves_o with_o sensible_a devotion_n as_o i_o have_v say_v but_o let_v we_o give_v thanks_n to_o our_o lord_n for_o give_v we_o so_o good_a desire_n to_o please_v he_o though_o our_o work_n be_v weak_a this_o way_n of_o carry_v christ_n our_o lord_n in_o our_o company_n be_v very_o useful_a in_o all_o the_o four_o state_n and_o degree_n of_o prayer_n it_o be_v a_o most_o secure_a and_o safe_a mean_n to_o go_v profit_v in_o the_o first_o degree_n and_o that_o we_o shall_v get_v quick_o to_o the_o second_o and_o then_o to_o be_v free_a also_o in_o the_o two_o last_o from_o those_o danger_n which_o the_o devil_n may_v provide_v for_o us._n for_o this_o in_o fine_a be_v that_o which_o we_o may_v be_v able_a to_o do_v and_o for_o any_o body_n to_o passe-up_a from_o hence_o and_o to_o exalt_v his_o spirit_n towards_o the_o feel_n of_o certain_a gust_n which_o be_v not_o allow_v he_o be_v but_o in_o my_o opinion_n to_o loose_v both_o the_o one_o and_o the_o other_o because_o in_o fine_a that_o be_v all_o supernatural_a and_o so_o the_o understanding_n be_v at_o a_o stand_v and_o lose_v the_o soul_n remain_v all_o desolate_a and_o with_o great_a dryness_n and_o since_o this_o whole_a building_n be_v ground_v upon_o humility_n the_o near_o we_o grow_v to_o almighty_a god_n the_o more_o shall_v we_o proceed_v and_o profit_n in_o this_o virtue_n and_o if_o we_o do_v not_o this_o all_o be_v lose_v and_o it_o seem_v to_o be_v no_o better_o than_o a_o kind_n of_o pride_n if_o we_o desire_v to_o get-up_a to_o a_o high_a rank_n since_o god_n do_v we_o but_o too_o much_o honour_n and_o favour_n consider_v how_o unworthy_a we_o be_v in_o suffer_v we_o to_o be_v so_o near_o to_o himself_o but_o now_o it_o must_v not_o be_v so_o understand_v as_o if_o i_o speak_v all_o this_o against_o raising-up_a our_o thought_n to_o consider_v the_o high_a thing_n of_o heaven_n or_o of_o god_n or_o of_o the_o greatness_n which_o be_v there_o above_o as_o also_o of_o his_o incomparable_a wisdom_n for_o though_o i_o never_o do_v this_o because_o i_o have_v no_o ability_n for_o this_o purpose_n as_o i_o have_v say_v and_o i_o find_v myself_o so_o miserable_a and_o so_o mean_a that_o god_n do_v i_o particular_a favour_n to_o enable_v i_o to_o think_v of_o earthly_a thing_n by_o mean_n whereof_o i_o may_v come_v afterward_o to_o understand_v this_o truth_n for_o even_o this_o be_v no_o small_a adventure_n for_o i_o and_o how_o much_o more_o be_v it_o so_o to_o consider_v celestial_a thing_n yet_o other_o may_v take_v benefit_n hereby_o and_o especial_o if_o they_o have_v learning_n and_o knowledge_n which_o be_v in_o my_o opinion_n a_o great_a treasure_n towards_o this_o exercise_n of_o prayer_n if_o it_o be_v accompany_v with_o humility_n i_o have_v see_v the_o truth_n of_o this_o very_o late_o by_o occasion_n of_o some_o learned_a man_n who_o begin_v not_o long_o ago_o and_o yet_o have_v proceed_v and_o profit_v very_o much_o which_o make_v i_o have_v a_o earnest_n and_o even_o a_o kind_n of_o impatient_a desire_n that_o many_o such_o as_o be_v learned_a will_v grow_v to_o be_v very_o spiritual_a man_n whereof_o i_o shall_v give_v the_o reason_n hereafter_o but_o now_o that_o which_o i_o have_v say_v namely_o that_o man_n must_v not_o exalt_v themselves_o to_o rise_v high_o than_o god_n do_v raise_v they_o be_v a_o certain_a kind_n of_o language_n of_o spirit_n and_o he_o will_v understand_v i_o who_o have_v experience_n of_o it_o but_o as_o for_o i_o i_o know_v not_o how_o to_o express_v it_o if_o he_o know_v not_o how_o to_o understand_v i_o by_o what_o i_o have_v say_v in_o mystical_a theology_n whereof_o i_o begin_v to_o speak_v the_o understanding_n cease_v from_o work_v because_o almighty_a god_n themselves_o suspend_v it_o as_o i_o will_v declare_v hereafter_o if_o i_o be_v able_a and_o if_o he_o give_v i_o grace_n for_o that_o purpose_n but_o as_o for_o we_o to_o presume_v yea_o or_o so_o much_o as_o to_o think_v of_o suspend_v it_o be_v that_o which_o i_o be_o say_v we_o shall_v not_o do_v nor_o must_v we_o leave_v to_o act_v and_o work_v thereby_o and_o therewith_o for_o if_o we_o do_v we_o shall_v be_v stupid_a and_o sottish_a and_o cold_a and_o we_o shall_v effect_v neither_o the_o one_o nor_o the_o other_o but_o when_o our_o lord_n suspend_v and_o stopp_n it_o he_o furnish_v it_o with_o matter_n upon_o which_o the_o party_n may_v employ_v himself_o and_o at_o which_o he_o may_v be_v amaze_v and_o he_o make_v he_o understand_v more_o in_o the_o time_n and_o space_n of_o say_v one_o
a_o sweet_a repose_n or_o sleep_v of_o all_o the_o power_n which_o be_v yet_o neither_o total_o lose_v nor_o yet_o do_v they_o know_v how_o they_o work_v this_o gust_n and_o delight_n and_o suavitie_n be_v great_a beyond_o all_o comparison_n than_o the_o former_a for_o the_o water_n of_o this_o grace_n gets-up_a to_o the_o very_a throat_n of_o the_o soul_n in_o such_o sort_n that_o now_o it_o can_v go_v forward_o nor_o know_v how_o to_o do_v it_o nor_o yet_o will_v by_o any_o mean_n return_v backward_o but_o enjoy_v a_o excessive_a kind_n of_o glory_n it_o be_v as_o when_o a_o man_n be_v already_o with_o the_o holy_a die_v candle_n in_o his_o hand_n so_o that_o now_o there_o want_v very_o little_a of_o die_v but_o it_o be_v of_o that_o very_a death_n which_o be_v desire_v for_o she_o be_v enjoy_v the_o great_a delight_n that_o can_v be_v imagine_v in_o that_o agony_n of_o she_o and_o i_o think_v it_o be_v no_o other_o thing_n then_o even_o to_o die_v as_o it_o be_v entire_o to_o all_o the_o thing_n of_o this_o world_n and_o to_o be_v enjoy_v almighty_a god_n for_o my_o part_n i_o can_v think_v of_o no_o other_o term_n wherewith_o to_o express_v it_o or_o declare_v it_o nor_o know_v the_o soul_n at_o that_o time_n what_o to_o do_v nor_o whether_o she_o shall_v speak_v or_o be_v silent_a or_o laugh_v or_o weep_v mind_n it_o be_v a_o glorious_a kind_n of_o frenzy_n and_o a_o celestial_a kind_n of_o folly_n where_o yet_o true_a wisdom_n be_v learn_v and_o it_o be_v a_o most_o delightful_a manner_n of_o enjoy_v for_o the_o soul_n in_o a_o superlative_a degree_n it_o be_v true_a that_o it_o may_v be_v about_o some_o five_o or_o six_o year_n since_o first_o our_o lord_n vouchsafe_v to_o allow_v i_o this_o kind_n of_o prayer_n often_o and_o in_o great_a abundance_n and_o that_o i_o neither_o do_v either_o perfect_o understand_v it_o nor_o yet_o can_v exact_o declare_v it_o and_o for_o my_o part_n i_o make_v account_v when_o i_o be_v come_v hither_o that_o i_o can_v say_v either_o little_a or_o nothing_o and_o yet_o i_o well_o understand_v that_o this_o be_v not_o a_o entire_a union_n of_o all_o the_o power_n of_o the_o soul_n and_o yet_o still_o that_o it_o be_v clear_o more_o than_o may_v be_v find_v in_o the_o former_a degree_n of_o prayer_n and_o yet_o withal_o i_o must_v ever_o confess_v that_o i_o can_v not_o tell_v how_o to_o know_v and_o much_o less_o exact_o determine_v what_o this_o difference_n be_v but_o i_o well_o believe_v that_o for_o the_o humility_n which_o your_o reverence_n have_v show_v in_o be_v desirous_a to_o help_v yourself_o by_o so_o great_a a_o simplicity_n as_o i_o our_o lord_n give_v i_o this_o prayer_n this_o day_n immediate_o after_o my_o receive_v the_o b._n sacrament_n yet_o without_o my_o be_v able_a to_o go_v forward_o and_o he_o put_v these_o comparison_n into_o my_o head_n and_o teach_v i_o the_o manner_n how_o to_o express_v they_o and_o what_o the_o soul_n be_v to_o do_v in_o these_o case_n and_o real_o i_o be_v amaze_v at_o it_o for_o i_o understand_v all_o this_o business_n at_o a_o instant_n many_o time_n i_o be_v as_o it_o be_v out_o of_o myself_o and_o as_o if_o i_o have_v be_v even_o inebriate_v with_o this_o love_n and_o yet_o i_o can_v never_o understand_v how_o it_o be_v only_o i_o know_v very_o well_o that_o it_o be_v god_n but_o i_o can_v not_o tell_v the_o manner_n how_o he_o wrought_v in_o i_o at_o that_o time_n for_o it_o be_v the_o very_a truth_n that_o the_o prayer_n power_n be_v as_o it_o be_v all_o unite_a though_o yet_o not_o so_o ingulf_v but_o that_o still_o they_o work_v and_o i_o have_v be_v extreme_o joy_v that_o at_o length_n i_o be_o come_v to_o understand_v it_o and_o bless_v be_v our_o lord_n for_o ever_o who_o have_v regale_v i_o in_o so_o high_a a_o degree_n these_o power_n have_v only_o now_o ability_n to_o busy_v themselves_o total_o upon_o almighty_a god_n nor_o do_v it_o seem_v that_o any_o of_o they_o now_o even_o dare_v so_o much_o as_o hover_v or_o stir_v not_o as_o it_o be_v breath_n if_o we_o do_v not_o divert_v our_o self_n then_o with_o great_a endeavour_n yea_o and_o even_o so_o i_o think_v we_o can_v scarce_o do_v it_o entire_o at_o that_o time_n a_o multitude_n of_o word_n be_v conceive_v here_o by_o the_o soul_n in_o praise_n of_o our_o lord_n but_o yet_o so_o as_o that_o they_o be_v without_o any_o order_n unless_o our_o lord_n himself_o be_v please_v to_o order_v they_o for_o at_o least_o the_o understanding_n serve_v here_o for_o nothing_o the_o soul_n will_v fain_o cry_v out_o in_o praise_n of_o almighty_a god_n &_o she_o be_v then_o in_o such_o condition_n as_o that_o she_o know_v not_o how_o to_o contain_v herself_o this_o be_v now_o a_o very_a favourie_a kind_n of_o disquiet_n and_o now_o yea_o even_o very_o now_o the_o flower_n open_v themselves_o to_o blossom_n and_o already_o do_v they_o begin_v to_o yield_v their_o odour_n and_o here_o the_o soul_n will_v be_v glad_a that_o all_o the_o world_n may_v be_v able_a to_o see_v and_o understand_v her_o glory_n that_o so_o almighty_a god_n may_v be_v praise_v and_o that_o they_o may_v be_v able_a to_o assist_v she_o therein_o and_o that_o she_o may_v give_v they_o part_v of_o her_o joy_n as_o not_o know_v how_o to_o enjoy_v it_o all_o herself_o i_o think_v she_o be_v now_o to_o be_v like_o she_o of_o the_o gospel_n who_o have_v a_o mind_n to_o call-in_a all_o her_o neighbour_n or_o else_o like_a the_o admirable_a spirit_n of_o the_o royal_a prophet_n david_n who_o may_v feel_v some_o such_o thing_n in_o himself_o as_o this_o when_o he_o play_v upon_o his_o harp_n and_o sing_v in_o honour_n and_o praise_n of_o almighty_a god_n i_o find_v myself_o very_o much_o devote_a to_o this_o glorious_a king_n and_o i_o wish_v that_o all_o the_o world_n be_v so_o especial_o all_o we_o who_o be_v sinner_n o_o my_o dear_a lord_n what_o kind_n of_o thing_n be_v a_o soul_n when_o she_o find_v herself_o in_o such_o a_o condition_n as_o this_o she_o will_v fain_o become_v all_o tongue_n to_o praise_v our_o lord_n she_o utter_v a_o thousand_o holy_a impertinency_n but_o yet_o she_o do_v ever_o endeavour_v to_o hit_v right_a in_o please_v he_o who_o hold_v she_o there_o in_o that_o manner_n i_o know_v of_o a_o certain_a person_n who_o though_o she_o be_v no_o poet_n yet_o instant_o do_v she_o happen_v to_o make_v certain_a verse_n all_o extempore_o which_o be_v very_o significant_a in_o the_o way_n of_o complaint_n &_o declare_v her_o pain_n very_o well_o though_o they_o be_v not_o make_v by_o her_o own_o understanding_n alone_o but_o for_o the_o better_a enjoy_v that_o glory_n which_o give_v she_o so_o delightful_a a_o pain_n she_o complain_v thereof_o to_o her_o god_n she_o wish_v that_o she_o may_v be_v all_o tear_v in_o piece_n both_o in_o body_n and_o soul_n to_o show_v the_o joy_n she_o find_v to_o feel_v this_o pain_n what_o torment_n can_v then_o be_v set_v before_o she_o which_o then_o she_o will_v not_o be_v glad_a to_o endure_v for_o the_o 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o_o my_o king_n i_o most_o humble_o beseech_v and_o beg_v at_o thy_o hand_n that_o since_o when_o even_o now_o i_o be_o not_o whole_o out_o of_o this_o holy_a celestial_a frenzy_n or_o folly_n which_o through_o thy_o goodness_n and_o mercy_n and_o so_o whole_o without_o any_o merit_n of_o i_o thou_o do_v i_o the_o great_a favour_n to_o impart_v either_o all_o such_o person_n as_o with_o who_o i_o shall_v have_v occasion_n to_o converse_v may_v be_v even_o as_o it_o be_v mad_a fool_n for_o thy_o love_n or_o else_o dispose_v thou_o so_o of_o i_o as_o that_o
have_v already_o show_v that_o there_o be_v then_o no_o power_n at_o all_o to_o do_v any_o thing_n that_o i_o express_v myself_o to_o his_o divine_a majesty_n much_o after_o this_o manner_n o_o lord_n consider_v well_o what_o thou_o do_v forget_v not_o my_o so_o very_a grievous_a sin_n so_o very_o soon_o and_o though_o thou_o have_v forget_v they_o so_o far_o as_o to_o vouchsafe_v to_o forgive_v they_o yet_o remember_v they_o also_o i_o humble_o beseech_v thou_o so_o far_o as_o to_o make_v thou_o put_v some_o limit_n upon_o those_o favour_n which_o thou_o be_v please_v to_o bestow_v upon_o i_o pour_v not_o o_o my_o creator_n so_o precious_a a_o liquor_n as_o that_o into_o so_o break_v a_o vessel_n as_o this_o since_o already_o thou_o have_v see_v how_o often_o i_o have_v scatter_v and_o spill_v it_o o_o lodge_v not_o and_o trust_v not_o such_o a_o treasure_n as_o this_o where_o the_o appetite_n and_o affection_n to_o all_o the_o consolation_n of_o this_o life_n be_v not_o yet_o so_o 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though_o i_o now_o begin_v to_o labour_n that_o i_o may_v not_o utter_o loose_v they_o through_o thy_o favour_n which_o also_o have_v no_o need_n to_o be_v little_a consider_v what_o kind_n of_o thing_n i_o be_o shall_v yet_o be_v never_o able_a to_o gain_v any_o other_o creature_n to_o thou_o by_o mean_n thereof_o in_o fine_a i_o be_o a_o woman_n and_o no_o good_a woman_n but_o a_o very_a wicked_a one_o and_o it_o seem_v that_o these_o talent_n of_o thou_o be_v thus_o not_o only_o to_o be_v hide_v by_o this_o mean_n but_o even_o to_o be_v quite_o bury_v up_o since_o thou_o put_v they_o into_o so_o ungracious_a and_o unlucky_a a_o soil_n thou_o be_v not_o wont_a o_o lord_n to_o impart_v such_o favour_n and_o greatness_n as_o these_o to_o any_o soul_n but_o when_o there_o may_v be_v hope_n that_o she_o will_v be_v able_a to_o gain_v many_o other_o to_o thy_o service_n and_o thou_o know_v o_o my_o god_n already_o that_o i_o have_v sometime_o beg_v this_o favour_n and_o still_o i_o beg_v 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the_o grace_n and_o effect_n prayer_n which_o remain_v by_o this_o prayer_n in_o the_o soul_n and_o what_o that_o be_v which_o she_o may_v be_v able_a to_o do_v of_o herself_o and_o if_o she_o may_v any_o way_n conduce_v towards_o the_o bring_n herself_o to_o this_o high_a state_n it_o happen_v that_o this_o elevation_n of_o the_o spirit_n or_o union_n come_v both_o of_o they_o with_o a_o celestial_a kind_n of_o love._n for_o according_a to_o my_o way_n of_o understanding_n this_o union_n union_n be_v a_o different_a thing_n from_o elevation_n though_o yet_o the_o soul_n be_v elevate_v in_o this_o very_a union_n whosoever_o have_v not_o try_v and_o feel_v this_o last_o will_v be_v of_o a_o different_a conceit_n but_o yet_o in_o my_o opinion_n though_o even_o it_o shall_v be_v all_o one_o yet_o our_o lord_n work_v therein_o after_o a_o different_a manner_n and_o by_o the_o increase_n which_o the_o soul_n have_v of_o be_v able_a to_o untie_v herself_o from_o the_o love_n of_o all_o creature_n she_o seem_v to_o be_v very_o much_o great_a in_o that_o flight_n and_o elevation_n of_o the_o spirit_n and_o i_o have_v clear_o see_v that_o this_o be_v a_o distinct_a and_o particular_a favour_n although_o the_o thing_n themselves_o may_v be_v all_o one_o as_o i_o say_v or_o at_o least_o may_v seem_v so_o but_o a_o small_a fire_n be_v as_o true_o and_o real_o fire_n as_o a_o great_a one_o and_o yet_o still_o we_o see_v difference_n enough_o between_o the_o one_o and_o the_o other_o for_o before_o a_o little_a iron_n can_v be_v able_a to_o be_v make_v red_a hot_a in_o a_o small_a fire_n a_o good_a space_n of_o time_n will_v be_v spend_v but_o now_o if_o the_o fire_n be_v great_a the_o iron_n though_o it_o be_v also_o great_a will_v loose_v the_o appearance_n of_o iron_n very_o quick_o just_o so_o do_v it_o seem_v to_o i_o to_o happen_v in_o these_o two_o sort_n of_o favour_n from_o our_o bless_a lord_n and_o i_o know_v that_o whosoever_o may_v ever_o have_v arrive_v to_o be_v in_o rapt_v will_v understand_v i_o well_o but_o such_o as_o have_v have_v no_o experience_n therein_o will_v hold_v all_o that_o to_o be_v impertinent_a which_o i_o have_v say_v perhaps_o also_o it_o be_v so_o indeed_o and_o so_o as_o he_o will_v have_v have_v reason_n who_o believe_v it_o for_o how_o shall_v such_o a_o thing_n as_o i_o presume_v to_o speak_v of_o such_o a_o thing_n as_o this_o and_o to_o give_v some_o part_n of_o that_o to_o be_v understand_v which_o it_o seem_v impossible_a even_o to_o begin_v to_o declare_v with_o any_o word_n so_o that_o it_o be_v not_o strange_a a_o whitt_n if_o i_o talk_v idle_o but_o yet_o i_o believe_v this_o of_o our_o bless_a lord_n because_o his_o divine_a majesty_n know_v that_o next_o to_o this_o act_n of_o obedience_n my_o intention_n be_v no_o other_o then_o to_o make_v soul_n even_o as_o it_o be_v gluttonous_a after_o the_o obtain_n of_o so_o high_a a_o good_a that_o he_o will_v be_v please_v to_o assist_v i_o herein_o and_o i_o be_o sure_a i_o will_v say_v nothing_o whereof_o i_o have_v not_o have_v much_o experience_n and_o it_o be_v a_o real_a truth_n that_o when_o i_o begin_v to_o write_v of_o this_o water_n i_o conceive_v it_o to_o be_v a_o more_o impossible_a thing_n for_o i_o to_o treat_v of_o it_o then_o to_o speak_v greek_a so_o very_o hard_o do_v i_o find_v it_o upon_o this_o i_o give_v it_o over_o and_o go_v to_o receive_v the_o bless_a sacrament_n but_o our_o lord_n be_v ever_o praise_v who_o do_v so_o great_a favour_n to_o ignorant_a person_n o_o virtue_n of_o obedience_n which_o be_v able_a to_o do_v all_o thing_n for_o almighty_a god_n do_v illuminate_v my_o understanding_n sometime_o by_o help_v i_o to_o the_o very_a express_a word_n which_o i_o be_v to_o use_v and_o at_o other_o time_n by_o represent_v the_o manner_n to_o i_o how_o i_o shall_v declare_v the_o thing_n so_o that_o as_o his_o divine_a majesty_n be_v please_v to_o do_v in_o the_o former_a degree_n of_o prayer_n it_o seem_v that_o he_o will_v also_o here_o declare_v what_o i_o neither_o can_v nor_o know_v how_o to_o express_v but_o that_o which_o now_o i_o say_v be_v a_o most_o literal_a truth_n and_o so_o that_o which_o shall_v be_v good_a be_v his_o instruction_n and_o doctrine_n and_o whatsoever_o falls-out_a to_o be_v ill_a it_o be_v clear_a that_o it_o proceed_v and_o flow_v from_o this_o deep_a sea_n of_o mischief_n and_o sin_n which_o be_v myself_o and_o therefore_o i_o here_o affirm_v that_o if_o any_o have_v arrive_v to_o these_o point_n and_o particular_n of_o prayer_n wherein_o our_o lord_n have_v do_v so_o great_a favour_n
my_o lord_n who_o haste_n in_o such_o sort_n vouchsafe_v to_o make_v so_o filthy_a a_o fishpond_n as_o i_o be_v become_v so_o pure_a and_o clear_v a_o water_n as_o that_o it_o may_v serve_v for_o thy_o own_o table_n be_v thou_o adore_v and_o praise_v o_o thou_o regalo_n of_o the_o angel_n who_o have_v vouchsafe_v thus_o to_o exalt_v so_o base_a a_o worm_n this_o profit_n of_o the_o soul_n remain_v for_o some_o time_n therein_o and_o now_o she_o can_v already_o understand_v clear_o enough_o that_o the_o fruit_n be_v none_o of_o her_o own_o and_o she_o begin_v to_o give_v part_n of_o it_o to_o other_o without_o ever_o feel_v any_o want_n of_o it_o herself_o she_o now_o begin_v also_o to_o give_v sign_n and_o appearance_n of_o be_v the_o owner_n of_o some_o such_o soul_n as_o it_o to_o be_v a_o jewel-house_n fit_a for_o the_o treasure_n of_o heaven_n and_o to_o carry_v great_a desire_n of_o make_v other_o partake_v they_o and_o humble_o to_o beseech_v almighty_a god_n that_o she_o may_v not_o be_v alone_o in_o possess_v they_o she_o begin_v now_o to_o profit_v her_o neighbour_n without_o almost_o understand_v it_o herself_o and_o without_o her_o seem_a to_o do_v any_o thing_n therein_o but_o they_o who_o receive_v the_o benefit_n understand_v it_o well_o for_o already_o do_v those_o flower_n yield_v so_o high_a and_o apparent_a a_o scent_n that_o it_o invite_v all_o the_o world_n to_o come_v near_o they_o they_o know_v that_o she_o have_v great_a virtue_n and_o they_o see_v that_o the_o fruit_n be_v very_o tempt_v and_o they_o will_v fain_o help_v she_o to_o eat_v it_o and_o now_o if_o the_o earth_n of_o this_o garden_n be_v manure_v and_o digged-up_a very_o deep_a with_o persecution_n with_o detraction_n and_o with_o sickness_n as_o there_o be_v few_o who_o arrive_v thus_o far_o without_o these_o thing_n and_o if_o also_o it_o be_v very_o clean_o strip_v of_o all_o proper_a interest_n the_o water_n sink_v so_o very_o deep_o into_o this_o soil_n that_o it_o will_v scarce_o be_v ever_o dry_a again_o but_o yet_o if_o it_o be_v such_o a_o kind_n of_o earth_n as_o that_o with_o be_v earth_n it_o have_v also_o such_o a_o quantity_n and_o company_n of_o thorn_n as_o i_o remain_v with_o in_o the_o beginning_n and_o if_o it_o want_v a_o rooting-out_a of_o the_o occasion_n of_o ill_a and_o be_v not_o withal_o so_o grateful_a as_o so_o high_a a_o favour_n require_v that_o soil_n grow_v again_o to_o be_v dry_a and_o in_o that_o case_n if_o the_o gardner_n prove_v negligent_a and_o slack_a and_o if_o out_o lord_n through_o his_o own_o only_o goodness_n do_v not_o again_o resolve_v to_o bestow_v rain_n upon_o it_o you_o may_v well_o give_v this_o garden_n for_o destroy_v and_o lose_v for_o just_a thus_o do_v it_o happen_v to_o i_o several_a time_n and_o real_o i_o be_o even_o amaze_v to_o reflect_v upon_o it_o yea_o and_o it_o be_v not_o possible_a for_o i_o to_o believe_v it_o if_o the_o case_n have_v not_o be_v whole_o i_o own_o but_o now_o i_o write_v thus_o much_o for_o the_o comfort_n of_o such_o soul_n as_o be_v weak_a like_o i_o to_o the_o end_n that_o they_o may_v never_o despair_v nor_o so_o much_o as_o once_o leave_v to_o have_v confidence_n in_o the_o greatness_n of_o almighty_a god_n and_o that_o comfort_n although_o they_o shall_v fall_v even_o after_o our_o lord_n have_v bring_v they_o to_o so_o incomparable_a favour_n as_o be_v mention_v here_o they_o must_v not_o yet_o despair_v unless_o they_o will_v be_v total_o lose_v for_o there_o be_v nothing_o which_o will_v not_o be_v get_v with_o tear_n and_o so_o the_o employ_v of_o one_o water_n will_v be_v the_o mean_n of_o get_v another_o one_o of_o the_o thing_n by_o which_o i_o have_v be_v animate_v with_o be_v that_o miserable_a creature_n which_o i_o be_o to_o write_v this_o discourse_n and_o to_o give_v this_o kind_n of_o account_n of_o my_o wicked_a life_n and_o of_o the_o favour_n which_o our_o lord_n have_v be_v please_v to_o do_v i_o and_o that_o not_o whilst_o i_o 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now_o i_o return_v most_o humble_o to_o beseech_v your_o reverence_n that_o if_o you_o mean_v to_o impart_v these_o thing_n which_o i_o have_v write_v concern_v my_o prayer_n they_o may_v be_v very_o spiritual_a person_n to_o who_o you_o do_v it_o for_o if_o they_o understand_v no_o more_o than_o some_o one_o way_n or_o if_o they_o have_v remain_v in_o the_o half_a way_n they_o will_v never_o be_v so_o well_o able_a to_o hit_v right_a now_o there_o be_v some_o who_o almighty_a god_n carry_v instant_o by_o a_o very_a sublime_a kind_n of_o address_n and_o they_o perhaps_o will_v conceive_v that_o other_o may_v also_o profit_v there_o and_o may_v quiet_v and_o calm_v the_o understanding_n and_o not_o serve_v themselves_o at_o all_o of_o the_o mean_n of_o any_o corporeal_a object_n but_o yet_o these_o creature_n with_o all_o this_o shall_v come_v in_o fine_a to_o remain_v as_o dry_v as_o a_o stick_n and_o some_o who_o have_v grow_v to_o enjoy_v a_o little_a quiet_a grow_v also_o to_o 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myself_o more_o to_o prayer_n our_o lord_n begin_v also_o to_o do_v i_o favour_n as_o one_o who_o in_o all_o appearance_n desire_v but_o that_o i_o will_v be_v content_a to_o receive_v they_o his_o divine_a majesty_n do_v therefore_o then_o very_o ordinary_o give_v i_o the_o prayer_n of_o quiet_a and_o many_o time_n that_o also_o of_o union_n which_o last_v very_o long_o fit_v of_o time_n but_o now_o when_o i_o understand_v that_o there_o have_v occur_v great_a illusion_n of_o certain_a woman_n and_o deceit_n which_o the_o devil_n put_v upon_o they_o i_o begin_v to_o be_v afraid_a as_o consider_v the_o delight_n and_o sweetness_n
do_v it_o himself_o as_o indeed_o he_o do_v nor_o yet_o can_v i_o ever_o imagine_v that_o it_o will_v prove_v to_o take_v effect_n with_o i_o as_o yet_o it_o fall_v out_o to_o do_v because_o already_o i_o have_v use_v some_o endeavour_n that_o way_n and_o the_o affliction_n which_o i_o receive_v by_o it_o be_v so_o great_a that_o i_o resolve_v to_o give_v over_o the_o attempt_n as_o be_v a_o thing_n which_o i_o hold_v not_o to_o be_v inconvenient_a to_o continue_v but_o now_o here_o our_o bless_a lord_n impart_v both_o liberty_n and_o strength_n to_o i_o to_o put_v it_o in_o execution_n i_o tell_v this_o very_a thing_n to_o my_o ghostly_a father_n and_o i_o give_v over_o that_o friendship_n according_a to_o what_o i_o have_v be_v command_v and_o it_o do_v they_o no_o little_a good_a with_o who_o i_o have_v be_v wont_a to_o converse_v to_o see_v this_o resolution_n grow_v in_o i_o almighty_a god_n be_v ever_o bless_v and_o praise_v who_o give_v i_o that_o liberty_n and_o power_n in_o one_o god_n moment_n which_o i_o have_v not_o be_v able_a to_o purchase_v and_o obtain_v of_o myself_o by_o the_o multitude_n of_o those_o great_a diligence_n which_o i_o have_v use_v many_o year_n in_o order_n to_o this_o end_n though_o yet_o i_o have_v employ_v myself_o so_o earnest_o upon_o this_o attempt_n that_o it_o have_v cost_v i_o a_o good_a part_n of_o my_o health_n but_o now_o this_o have_v be_v wrought_v and_o grant_v by_o he_o who_o be_v the_o omnipotent_a and_o true_a lord_n of_o all_o creature_n it_o put_v i_o not_o even_o to_o the_o least_o pain_n or_o trouble_v at_o all_o the_o five_o and_o twenty_o chapter_n she_o treat_v here_o of_o the_o way_n and_o manner_n of_o understand_v those_o word_n or_o speech_n which_o almighty_a god_n be_v please_v to_o utter_v to_o the_o soul_n though_o yet_o without_o hear_v any_o voice_n or_o sound_n and_o of_o some_o error_n or_o abuse_n which_o may_v happen_v herein_o and_o how_o the_o right_a may_v be_v know_v from_o the_o wrong_n 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mighty_a power_n and_o that_o his_o word_n be_v deed_n i_o think_v there_o be_v such_o a_o difference_n as_o there_o be_v between_o our_o speak_n or_o hear_v neither_o more_o â—orlesse_a for_o that_o which_o i_o speak_v i_o go_v order_v as_o i_o be_v say_v with_o my_o understanding_n but_o if_o another_o speak_v to_o i_o i_o do_v no_o more_o than_o hear_v without_o any_o trouble_n at_o all_o to_o myself_o one_o of_o these_o kind_n of_o word_n be_v like_o some_o thing_n whereof_o we_o can_v well_o determine_v whether_o it_o be_v not_o as_o of_o a_o man_n who_o be_v half_a asleep_a but_o this_o other_o be_v find_v to_o come_v from_o a_o voice_n so_o
distinct_a and_o clear_a that_o not_o one_o single_a syllable_n of_o all_o that_o which_o be_v say_v can_v be_v lose_v and_o yet_o these_o thing_n happen_v sometime_o when_o the_o understanding_n and_o indeed_o the_o whole_a soul_n be_v in_o so_o great_a distraction_n &_o disorder_n that_o it_o will_v never_o be_v able_a to_o hit_v right_a in_o the_o frame_n of_o one_o little_a piece_n of_o good_a discourse_n but_o she_o find_v in_o this_o other_o way_n certain_a great_a and_o weighty_a sentence_n which_o be_v impart_v to_o she_o so_o strange_o well_o order_v and_o dress_v that_o though_o she_o be_v never_o so_o deep_o recollect_v she_o be_v not_o able_a to_o reach_v they_o and_o yet_o at_o the_o very_a first_o word_n thereof_o as_o i_o be_v say_v they_o begin_v to_o make_v a_o total_a mutation_n of_o her_o soul_n and_o especial_o if_o she_o be_v bring_v into_o rapt_v when_o the_o power_n of_o the_o soul_n be_v suspend_v how_o shall_v those_o thing_n ever_o come_v to_o be_v 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other_o be_v a_o work_n rather_o than_o a_o word_n and_o though_o some_o part_n of_o it_o may_v be_v forget_v in_o a_o long_a tract_n of_o time_n yet_o the_o memory_n can_v loose_v it_o so_o far_o as_o not_o to_o know_v that_o it_o be_v say_v unless_o the_o time_n may_v have_v be_v very_o long_o or_o else_o if_o they_o be_v word_n of_o favour_n or_o of_o doctrine_n and_o instruction_n but_o if_o they_o be_v of_o prophesy_n they_o never_o happen_v in_o my_o opinion_n to_o be_v forget_v at_o least_o this_o never_o happen_v to_o i_o though_o yet_o i_o have_v a_o very_a ill_a memory_n and_o now_o i_o return_v to_o say_v that_o i_o think_v if_o a_o soul_n be_v not_o as_o it_o be_v so_o base_a and_o wicked_a as_o even_o in_o effect_n not_o to_o be_v a_o soul_n and_o unless_o it_o will_v counterfeit_v and_o feign_v which_o be_v mischief_n and_o misery_n enough_o and_o will_v say_v that_o she_o understand_v thing_n when_o yet_o real_o there_o be_v no_o such_o matter_n it_o be_v impossible_a but_o that_o she_o shall_v see_v clear_o that_o it_o be_v she_o herself_o who_o compose_v and_o frame_v those_o word_n and_o speak_v they_o to_o herself_o especial_o if_o she_o have_v have_v any_o understanding_n at_o all_o of_o the_o spirit_n of_o god_n for_o if_o she_o have_v not_o she_o may_v very_o well_o remain_v in_o this_o abuse_n or_o error_n all_o the_o day_n of_o her_o life_n and_o may_v perhaps_o conceive_v that_o she_o understand_v those_o word_n as_o speak_v by_o some_o other_o though_o yet_o for_o my_o part_n i_o confess_v that_o i_o can_v arrive_v to_o know_v how_o this_o shall_v be_v do_v for_o either_o this_o soul_n will_v understand_v they_o or_o not_o if_o she_o be_v dismiss_v herself_o of_o that_o which_o she_o understand_v and_o will_v fain_o understand_v no_o part_n of_o it_o for_o a_o thousand_o fear_n beside_o many_o other_o reason_n which_o she_o may_v have_v to_o continue_v quiet_a in_o her_o prayer_n without_o such_o accident_n as_o these_o how_o come_v she_o to_o allow_v so_o much_o time_n to_o the_o understanding_n as_o may_v serve_v for_o the_o compose_n of_o these_o reason_n for_o in_o fine_a there_o must_v be_v time_n for_o that_o but_o now_o in_o this_o other_o way_n we_o remain_v instruct_v without_o any_o loss_n of_o time_n at_o all_o yea_o and_o we_o grow_v to_o understand_v certain_a thing_n at_o a_o instant_n when_o yet_o otherwise_o a_o month_n will_v have_v be_v time_n little_a enough_o to_o ordain_v they_o yea_o and_o the_o understanding_n remain_v no_o less_o than_o amaze_v at_o some_o thing_n which_o we_o understand_v this_o be_v the_o very_a truth_n and_o whosoever_o
the_o matter_n be_v that_o when_o these_o thing_n be_v of_o the_o devil_n it_o seem_v as_o if_o all_o kind_n of_o benediction_n do_v hide_v itself_o and_o even_o fly_v from_o the_o soul_n so_o untoward_a and_o unquiet_a and_o in_o so_o great_a disorder_n do_v she_o remain_v without_o any_o one_o good_a effect_n at_o all_o for_o though_o there_o may_v be_v a_o seem_a as_o if_o there_o be_v a_o plant_n of_o good_a desire_n in_o she_o yet_o they_o be_v not_o effectual_a or_o strong_a the_o humility_n which_o he_o leave_v behind_o he_o be_v false_a unquiet_a and_o without_o any_o suavitie_n at_o all_o and_o i_o think_v this_o may_v be_v easy_o enough_o understand_v by_o any_o creature_n who_o have_v experience_n of_o what_o a_o good_a spirit_n be_v but_o yet_o the_o devil_n be_v very_o able_a to_o play_v many_o trick_n and_o therefore_o there_o be_v nothing_o of_o this_o kind_n so_o certain_a and_o clear_a but_o that_o somewhat_o may_v still_o be_v fear_v at_o his_o hand_n and_o so_o it_o will_v ever_o be_v well_o do_v to_o proceed_v with_o caution_n and_o advice_n and_o to_o have_v a_o director_n who_o may_v be_v learned_a and_o to_o conceal_v nothing_o from_o he_o and_o so_o the_o party_n shall_v be_v sure_a to_o take_v no_o hurt_n though_o yet_o i_o have_v have_v my_o part_n thereof_o through_o the_o excessive_a fear_n to_o which_o some_o of_o they_o be_v subject_a in_o particular_a it_o happen_v to_o i_o once_o that_o many_o person_n meet_v together_o in_o who_o i_o have_v belief_n enough_o and_o there_o be_v reason_n that_o i_o shall_v have_v it_o and_o though_o i_o proceed_v herein_o after_o the_o manner_n of_o entire_a confidence_n but_o with_o one_o yet_o when_o he_o command_v i_o i_o speak_v also_o with_o other_o they_o treat_v much_o about_o find_v remedy_n for_o all_o my_o inconvenience_n for_o they_o love_v i_o very_o much_o and_o i_o doubt_v that_o i_o may_v perhaps_o be_v deceive_v and_o i_o be_v also_o subject_a to_o extreme_a fear_n whensoever_o i_o be_v not_o in_o prayer_n for_o when_o i_o be_v and_o when_o our_o lord_n vouchsafe_v to_o do_v i_o any_o favour_n therein_o i_o grow_v present_o into_o good_a assurance_n and_o i_o think_v they_o be_v five_o or_o six_o of_o they_o and_o they_o be_v all_o great_a servant_n of_o almighty_a god_n but_o then_o my_o ghostly_a father_n tell_v i_o that_o they_o encounter_n all_o have_v grow_v to_o resolve_v that_o it_o be_v the_o devil_n and_o direct_v i_o not_o to_o communicate_v so_o often_o and_o that_o i_o shall_v endeavour_v to_o divert_v myself_o in_o such_o sort_n as_o that_o i_o may_v not_o be_v much_o alone_a now_o i_o be_v extreme_o timorous_a in_o these_o case_n as_o i_o have_v say_v and_o the_o palpitation_n of_o my_o hart_n help_v i_o on_o therein_o so_o that_o i_o have_v not_o the_o courage_n many_o time_n to_o be_v alone_o in_o my_o room_n even_o by_o day_n but_o when_o i_o find_v what_o so_o many_o of_o they_o affirm_v which_o yet_o i_o can_v by_o no_o mean_n believe_v i_o grow_v 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even_o all_o amaze_v at_o so_o great_a tribulation_n as_o i_o endure_v and_o with_o so_o much_o fear_n to_o consider_v whether_o the_o devil_n be_v to_o have_v power_n to_o circumvent_v i_o in_o this_o manner_n or_o no._n and_o be_v all_o disorder_a and_o even_o tire_v without_o know_v what_o to_o do_v with_o myself_o for_o i_o have_v see_v myself_o in_o this_o affliction_n and_o that_o very_a often_o though_o yet_o never_o to_o my_o think_n in_o so_o great_a extremity_n as_o then_o i_o remain_v four_o or_o five_o hour_n after_o this_o manner_n for_o there_o seem_v to_o be_v no_o comfort_n at_o all_o for_o i_o either_o upon_o earth_n or_o yet_o from_o heaven_n but_o our_o lord_n leave_v i_o so_o in_o sufferance_n and_o under_o the_o fear_n also_o of_o a_o thousand_o danger_n o_o my_o dear_a lord_n and_o how_o true_o be_v thou_o a_o true_a friend_n and_o how_o powerful_a be_v thou_o to_o do_v what_o thou_o will_v and_o do_v never_o leave_v to_o love_v they_o who_o love_v thou_o if_o they_o love_v thou_o indeed_o let_v all_o thing_n praise_v thou_o o_o thou_o lord_n of_o the_o whole_a world_n and_o o_o that_o i_o can_v cry_v out_o loud_a enough_o through_o that_o whole_a world_n to_o declare_v how_o faithful_a and_o true_a thou_o be_v to_o thy_o friend_n all_o other_o thing_n grow_v to_o fail_v we_o but_o thou_o who_o be_v the_o lord_n of_o they_o all_o do_v never_o fail_v and_o it_o be_v little_a also_o which_o thou_o permit_v such_o as_o love_v thou_o to_o suffer_v for_o thou_o o_o my_o dear_a lord_n how_o delicate_o and_o how_o smooth_o yea_o and_o how_o savoury_o also_o do_v thou_o know_v how_o to_o treat_v such_o soul_n o_o that_o a_o creature_n who_o i_o know_v have_v be_v so_o happy_a as_o never_o to_o have_v detain_v herself_o upon_o love_v any_o other_o thing_n then_o thou_o it_o seem_v indeed_o o_o lord_n that_o sometime_o thou_o trye_v such_o as_o love_v thou_o with_o a_o kind_n of_o rigour_n to_o the_o end_n that_o by_o that_o extremity_n of_o trouble_n they_o may_v afterward_o come_v the_o better_o to_o find_v and_o feel_v thereby_o the_o great_a excess_n of_o thy_o love_n o_o my_o god_n that_o i_o have_v understanding_n and_o learning_n yea_o and_o new_a word_n so_o to_o be_v able_a to_o exaggerate_v thy_o work_n according_a to_o that_o intelligence_n which_o my_o soul_n have_v thereof_o all_o this_o be_v want_v to_o i_o o_o my_o dear_a lord_n but_o yet_o if_o thou_o forsake_v i_o not_o i_o will_v never_o be_v want_v to_o thou_o let_v all_o the_o learned_a man_n of_o the_o world_n rise-up_a against_o
i_o let_v the_o devil_n of_o hell_n torment_v i_o yea_o let_v all_o creature_n persecute_v i_o but_o only_o be_v not_o thou_o want_v to_o i_o o_o my_o dear_a lord_n for_o i_o know_v by_o good_a experience_n with_o how_o much_o advantage_n and_o fruit_n thou_o deliver_v all_o such_o person_n as_o put_v their_o confidence_n in_o thou_o alone_o for_o when_o i_o be_v in_o this_o great_a and_o miserable_a affliction_n of_o spirit_n at_o a_o time_n when_o i_o have_v not_o enjoy_v any_o one_o vision_n at_o all_o these_o only_a few_o lord_n follow_a word_n be_v sufficient_a to_o free_v i_o from_o all_o trouble_n and_o to_o quiet_v i_o entire_o fear_v not_o o_o my_o daughter_n for_o it_o be_v i_o and_o i_o will_v not_o forsake_v thou_o do_v not_o fear_v it_o seem_v to_o i_o that_o consider_v what_o kind_n of_o creature_n i_o be_v then_o there_o will_v have_v be_v need_n of_o a_o long_a time_n to_o persuade_v i_o to_o quiet_v myself_o and_o that_o no_o body_n will_v have_v be_v able_a to_o do_v it_o and_o yet_o now_o behold_v i_o here_o all_o quiet_v and_o compose_v by_o these_o few_o word_n and_o i_o be_v endue_v with_o strength_n with_o courage_n &_o with_o security_n which_o be_v accompany_v with_o a_o kind_n of_o repose_n and_o light_n in_o such_o sort_n as_o that_o at_o that_o very_a instant_n i_o see_v my_o soul_n become_v a_o direct_a other_o thing_n than_o it_o be_v before_o and_o i_o think_v i_o can_v even_o have_v dispute_v against_o the_o whole_a world_n in_o proof_n that_o this_o proceed_v from_o almighty_a god_n o_o what_o a_o good_a dear_a god_n be_v this_o o_o what_o a_o good_a dear_a lord_n be_v he_o and_o how_o very_o powerful_a for_o not_o only_o do_v he_o give_v the_o counsel_n but_o the_o remedy_n also_o his_o very_a word_n be_v work_n and_o o_o how_o do_v he_o both_o strengthen_v our_o faith_n and_o increase_v our_o love_n it_o be_v real_o very_o true_a that_o i_o often_o call_v to_o mind_n how_o our_o lord_n have_v command_v the_o wind_n to_o compose_v and_o quiet_a themselves_o at_o sea_n when_o a_o tempest_n have_v be_v raise_v and_o so_o also_o do_v i_o say_v who_o be_v this_o who_o all_o the_o power_n of_o my_o soul_n obey_v and_o who_o at_o a_o instant_n brings-in_a light_n to_o chase_v so_o great_a a_o obscurity_n away_o and_o make_v that_o hart_n grow_v soft_a and_o supple_a which_o seem_v to_o have_v the_o very_a hardness_n of_o stone_n and_o know_v how_o to_o drive_v and_o draw-downe_a the_o water_n of_o sweet_a tear_n where_o there_o be_v so_o great_a a_o drought_n so_o long_o before_o who_o be_v he_o that_o can_v inspire_v these_o desire_n who_o can_v imprint_v such_o a_o courage_n what_o be_v i_o about_o to_o doubt_v and_o what_o can_v i_o fear_v what_o be_v this_o i_o desire_v to_o serve_v this_o lord_n and_o i_o pretend_v no_o other_o thing_n then_o to_o please_v he_o i_o renounce_v all_o contentment_n and_o ease_n or_o any_o other_o good_a at_o all_o but_o only_o the_o accomplish_n of_o his_o will._n for_o of_o this_o i_o be_v very_o sure_a in_o my_o opinion_n and_o that_o i_o may_v safe_o affirm_v it_o that_o since_o this_o lord_n be_v so_o powerful_a as_o i_o see_v he_o be_v and_o as_o i_o know_v he_o be_v and_o that_o all_o the_o devil_n of_o hell_n be_v his_o slave_n and_o of_o this_o there_o can_v be_v no_o doubt_n since_o it_o be_v matter_n of_o faith_n and_o i_o be_v the_o servant_n of_o this_o lord_n and_o king_n what_o hurt_n can_v they_o all_o be_v able_a to_o do_v i_o and_o why_o may_v not_o i_o have_v strength_n enough_o to_o fight_v with_o all_o the_o power_n of_o hell_n i_o then_o take_v a_o cross_n into_o my_o hand_n and_o real_o i_o think_v god_n give_v i_o courage_n to_o conceive_v that_o i_o shall_v be_v short_o another_o kind_n of_o woman_n and_o that_o i_o be_v not_o to_o be_v afraid_a to_o wrestle_v a_o fall_n with_o the_o devil_n devil_n but_o conceive_v that_o together_o with_o that_o cross_n i_o shall_v be_v easy_o able_a to_o overcome_v they_o all_o yea_o and_o once_o i_o provoke_v they_o thus_o come_v towards_o i_o as_o many_o of_o you_o as_o dare_v for_o i_o be_v the_o servant_n of_o our_o lord_n will_v see_v what_o you_o all_o can_v do_v against_o i_o and_o it_o be_v most_o certain_a that_o i_o think_v they_o be_v afraid_a of_o i_o and_o for_o my_o part_n i_o remain_v so_o in_o quiet_a and_o so_o total_o without_o fear_n of_o they_o all_o that_o all_o the_o fear_n which_o i_o have_v former_o conceive_v till_o that_o very_o present_a time_n be_v remove_v from_o i_o for_o though_o i_o see_v they_o sometime_o as_o i_o shall_v declare_v afterward_o yet_o i_o never_o fear_v they_o more_o but_o conceive_v that_o they_o be_v rather_o afraid_a of_o i_o i_o possess_v a_o dominion_n over_o they_o which_o have_v be_v give_v i_o by_o the_o lord_n of_o all_o creature_n and_o i_o make_v no_o more_o reckon_n of_o they_o then_o of_o so_o many_o fly_n and_o they_o seem_v to_o be_v of_o so_o cowardly_a a_o nature_n that_o when_o once_o they_o come_v to_o find_v that_o they_o be_v not_o esteem_v they_o have_v no_o power_n at_o all_o for_o this_o kind_n of_o enemy_n know_v not_o how_o to_o set_v upon_o any_o one_o who_o render_v not_o himself_o up_o to_o they_o or_o else_o when_o almighty_a god_n permitt_v for_o the_o great_a good_a of_o his_o servant_n that_o they_o may_v tempt_v and_o torment_v they_o i_o will_v to_o god_n it_o may_v please_v his_o divine_a majesty_n that_o we_o will_v fear_v who_o indeed_o we_o ought_v to_o fear_v and_o that_o we_o may_v perfect_o understand_v that_o we_o shall_v receive_v more_o prejudice_n by_o commit_v any_o truth_n one_o single_a venial_a sin_n then_o by_o all_o the_o power_n of_o hell_n put_v together_o for_o this_o be_v a_o most_o certain_a truth_n how_o extreme_o do_v these_o devil_n carry_v we_o fright_v up_o and_o down_o because_o ourselves_o indeed_o will_v needs_o give_v occasion_n thereof_o by_o our_o be_v so_o close_o fasten_v as_o we_o be_v to_o our_o honour_n to_o our_o estate_n and_o to_o our_o delight_n for_o then_o we_o be_v join_v together_o with_o these_o impediment_n by_o love_v and_o desire_v to_o possess_v they_o who_o be_v our_o contrary_n &_o who_o we_o ought_v to_o abhor_v they_o grow_v able_a to_o do_v we_o much_o hurt_n for_o we_o enable_v they_o to_o fight_v against_o our_o very_a self_n with_o our_o own_o weapon_n which_o we_o put_v into_o their_o hand_n though_o indeed_o we_o be_v to_o defend_v ourselves_o thereby_o against_o they_o and_o this_o be_v both_o pity_n and_o shame_n but_o now_o if_o on_o the_o other_o side_n we_o shall_v resolve_v to_o abhor_v all_o those_o thing_n for_o the_o love_n of_o our_o lord_n and_o embrace_v his_o cross_n and_o pitch_n upon_o do_v he_o service_n in_o good_a earnest_n he_o fly_v as_o fast_v away_o from_o these_o solid_a truth_n as_o a_o man_n will_v do_v from_o the_o plague_n in_o fine_a he_o be_v a_o friend_n of_o lie_n yea_o and_o a_o very_a lie_n himself_o he_o be_v easy_o keep_v from_o meddle_v much_o with_o such_o person_n as_o walk_v entire_o according_a to_o truth_n but_o when_o once_o he_o can_v discover_v that_o a_o man_n understanding_n grow_v to_o be_v obscure_v he_o have_v a_o particular_a grace_n in_o procure_v to_o break_v the_o very_a string_n of_o his_o eye_n and_o if_o he_o see_v one_o already_o prove_v so_o blind_a as_o that_o he_o will_v needs_o build_v his_o rest_n and_o ease_n upon_o vain_a thing_n and_o so_o vain_a as_o that_o be_v thing_n of_o this_o world_n they_o be_v no_o better_o than_o toy_n fit_a for_o child_n he_o find_v already_o that_o such_o a_o person_n be_v a_o very_a child_n and_o so_o he_o treat_v he_o like_o such_o a_o one_o and_o wrestle_v with_o he_o more_o or_o less_o as_o he_o see_v cause_n i_o beseech_v our_o bless_a lord_n that_o i_o may_v never_o prove_v to_o be_v one_o of_o these_o but_o that_o his_o divine_a majesty_n may_v be_v please_v to_o do_v i_o so_o much_o favour_n as_o that_o i_o may_v understand_v that_o to_o be_v ease_n and_o rest_n which_o be_v indeed_o true_a ease_n and_o rest_n and_o that_o to_o be_v honour_n which_o be_v true_a honour_n &_o delight_n which_o be_v true_a delight_n and_o not_o the_o direct_a contrary_n to_o all_o this_o and_o then_o a_o fig_n for_o all_o the_o devil_n in_o hell_n for_o then_o they_o shall_v be_v all_o of_o they_o afraid_a of_o i_o for_o my_o part_n i_o understand_v not_o those_o fear_n of_o the_o devil_n and_o the_o devil_n and_o i_o know_v not_o what_o when_o we_o may_v be_v able_a to_o say_v god_n and_o god_n etc._n etc._n
this_o end_n some_o little_a poor_a good_a work_n which_o i_o do_v if_o i_o do_v any_o i_o become_v devote_a to_o some_o saint_n to_o the_o end_n that_o by_o their_o mean_n i_o may_v be_v deliver_v from_o the_o devil_n i_o perform_v the_o devotion_n of_o nine_o day_n i_o recommend_v myself_o to_o saint_n hilarion_n and_o to_o s._n michael_n also_o the_o archangel_n for_o i_o have_v late_o apply_v myself_o to_o he_o for_o this_o purpose_n and_o i_o importune_v also_o mame_v other_o saint_n that_o our_o lord_n may_v be_v please_v by_o their_o intercession_n to_o conduct_v i_o in_o the_o way_n of_o truth_n i_o say_v that_o they_o will_v find_v some_o mean_n to_o perfect_v this_o business_n of_o i_o with_o his_o divine_a majesty_n in_o fine_a after_o the_o end_n of_o two_o year_n which_o both_o i_o and_o other_o person_n have_v whole_o employ_v with_o all_o their_o prayer_n and_o i_o in_o order_n to_o this_o end_n that_o our_o lord_n may_v be_v please_v either_o to_o conduct_v my_o soul_n by_o some_o other_o way_n or_o else_o vouchsafe_v to_o declare_v that_o this_o way_n wherein_o i_o go_v be_v right_a for_o now_o those_o word_n and_o speech_n which_o i_o have_v relate_v that_o our_o lord_n will_v be_v utter_v to_o i_o sometime_o be_v grow_v very_o ordinary_a &_o even_o continual_a that_o chance_v and_o occur_v to_o i_o which_o i_o will_v now_o declare_v as_o i_o be_v in_o prayer_n one_o day_n and_o it_o be_v upon_o the_o festivitie_n of_o the_o glorious_a s._n peter_n i_o see_v stand_v very_o near_o i_o or_o rather_o to_o say_v better_o i_o think_v i_o feel_v for_o indeed_o i_o see_v nothing_o at_o all_o with_o the_o eye_n either_o of_o my_o body_n or_o of_o my_o mind_n that_o christ_n our_o lord_n be_v close_o by_o i_o and_o i_o find_v in_o fine_a that_o it_o be_v he_o in_o my_o opinion_n who_o be_v speak_v to_o i_o but_o now_o i_o who_o be_v extreme_o ignorant_a till_o then_o that_o there_o may_v be_v any_o such_o thing_n in_o the_o world_n as_o such_o a_o vision_n fall_v at_o the_o first_o into_o a_o mighty_a fear_n and_o i_o can_v do_v nothing_o but_o weep_v though_o yet_o through_o his_o give_v i_o assurance_n by_o his_o speak_v but_o one_o only_o word_n i_o find_v myself_o as_o i_o have_v former_o be_v not_o only_o without_o fear_n and_o very_o quiet_a but_o even_o with_o regalo_n and_o delight_n i_o thought_n that_o christ_n jesus_n our_o lord_n go_v ever_o close_o to_o i_o on_o one_o side_n but_o the_o vision_n not_o be_v imaginary_a or_o represent_v in_o any_o form_n i_o perceive_v not_o in_o what_o shape_n he_o be_v but_o as_o for_o his_o be_v ever_o on_o my_o right_a side_n i_o find_v and_o feel_v that_o very_o clear_o and_o that_o he_o be_v the_o witness_n of_o whatsoever_o i_o do_v and_o that_o i_o can_v not_o be_v recollect_v though_o it_o be_v never_o so_o little_a or_o rather_o indeed_o unless_o i_o be_v much_o divert_v or_o distract_v but_o i_o must_v needs_o in_o fine_a understand_v that_o he_o be_v very_o near_o i_o i_o than_o go_v immediate_o to_o my_o ghostly_a father_n be_v sufficient_o vex_v and_o grieved_a that_o i_o must_v let_v he_o know_v it_o he_o ask_v i_o what_o form_n or_o figure_n he_o have_v when_o i_o see_v he_o and_o i_o tell_v he_o that_o i_o have_v not_o see_v he_o upon_o this_o he_o inquire_v then_o how_o i_o know_v that_o it_o be_v christ_n our_o lord_n to_o this_o i_o answer_v that_o i_o know_v no_o more_o but_o that_o i_o can_v not_o possible_o fail_v or_o forbear_v to_o understand_v and_o know_v that_o he_o be_v close_o to_o i_o and_o that_o i_o find_v and_o feel_v it_o plain_o and_o that_o now_o the_o recollection_n of_o my_o soul_n in_o prayer_n of_o quiet_a be_v far_o great_a and_o more_o continual_a &_o that_o the_o effect_n be_v very_o different_a from_o those_o other_o which_o i_o have_v former_o find_v and_o that_o the_o thing_n be_v very_o certain_a and_o clear_a for_o my_o part_n i_o can_v do_v no_o more_o but_o bring_v diverse_a comparison_n whereby_o to_o give_v myself_o to_o be_v understand_v but_o yet_o certain_o in_o my_o opinion_n there_o be_v none_o which_o can_v suit_n very_o well_o to_o express_v this_o kind_n of_o vision_n for_o as_o this_o be_v one_o of_o the_o high_a kind_n as_o i_o be_v tell_v afterward_o by_o a_o certain_a holy_a man_n and_o of_o great_a spirit_n call_v fray_n pedro_n de_fw-fr alcantara_n who_o i_o shall_v mention_v afterward_o more_o at_o large_a and_o the_o same_o have_v be_v also_o tell_v i_o by_o other_o great_a learned_a man_n and_o that_o this_o be_v one_o of_o those_o favour_n where_o the_o devil_n can_v least_o intermeddle_v or_o intrude_v himself_o of_o all_o other_o so_o have_v we_o hear_v no_o word_n or_o term_n at_o all_o wherewith_o to_o declare_v it_o at_o least_o we_o who_o know_v so_o little_a though_o such_o as_o be_v learned_a will_n peradventure_o be_v able_a to_o do_v it_o better_o for_o when_o i_o say_v that_o i_o neither_o see_v this_o with_o the_o eye_n of_o the_o body_n nor_o of_o the_o mind_n because_o it_o be_v no_o imaginary_a vision_n how_o come_v i_o to_o understand_v and_o how_o can_v i_o undertake_v and_o affirm_v more_o clear_o &_o certain_o that_o christ_n our_o lord_n be_v stand_v near_o i_o then_o if_o i_o have_v see_v he_o with_o my_o very_a eye_n for_o it_o seem_v indeed_o to_o be_v as_o if_o a_o person_n be_v in_o the_o dark_a who_o see_v not_o another_o that_o stand_v by_o he_o or_o as_o if_o the_o same_o person_n be_v blind_a some_o resemblance_n i_o say_v this_o carry_v though_o yet_o not_o very_o much_o for_o in_o this_o last_o case_n a_o man_n may_v come_v to_o know_v it_o by_o the_o way_n of_o several_a sense_n because_o he_o may_v hear_v the_o other_o speak_v or_o stir_v or_o he_o may_v touch_v he_o but_o here_o there_o be_v nothing_o of_o all_o this_o nor_o be_v there_o here_o any_o darkness_n at_o all_o but_o only_o the_o thing_n be_v represent_v to_o the_o soul_n by_o a_o certain_a notice_n which_o be_v more_o clear_a than_o the_o sun_n i_o say_v not_o that_o any_o sun_n be_v see_v nor_o any_o clearness_n or_o brightness_n at_o all_o but_o only_o a_o certain_a light_n which_o illuminate_v and_o inform_v the_o understanding_n though_o yet_o without_o see_v any_o light_n to_o the_o end_n that_o the_o soul_n may_v enjoy_v so_o high_a a_o good_a now_o this_o bring_v great_a benefit_n with_o it_o yet_o be_v it_o not_o like_o such_o a_o presence_n of_o god_n as_o many_o time_n be_v feel_v in_o the_o mind_n and_o especial_o by_o such_o person_n as_o be_v arrive_v to_o union_n and_o quiet_a prayer_n who_o in_o resolve_v to_o begin_v to_o make_v that_o prayer_n seem_v to_o find_v the_o person_n ready_a at_o hand_n to_o who_o to_o speak_v and_o we_o seem_v to_o understand_v that_o he_o hear_v we_o by_o the_o effect_n and_o spiritual_a feeling_n which_o we_o find_v of_o great_a love_n and_o faith_n and_o other_o firm_a purpose_n and_o resolution_n accompany_v with_o much_o tenderness_n of_o denotion_n this_o be_v a_o great_a favour_n of_o almighty_a god_n and_o let_v he_o esteem_v it_o much_o who_o have_v it_o for_o it_o be_v a_o very_a elevate_v and_o high_a prayer_n but_o yet_o it_o be_v no_o vision_n but_o here_o it_o be_v understand_v that_o almighty_a god_n be_v there_o by_o the_o effect_n which_o as_o i_o have_v say_v he_o work_v in_o the_o soul_n for_o in_o this_o manner_n of_o prayer_n do_v his_o divine_a majesty_n vouchsafe_v to_o give_v hemself_n then_o and_o there_o to_o be_v feel_v but_o now_o here_o it_o be_v clear_o find_v that_o christ_n jesus_n the_o son_n of_o the_o virgin_n be_v present_a in_o that_o other_o manner_n of_o prayer_n there_o be_v certain_a influence_n of_o the_o divinity_n represent_v but_o here_o together_o with_o they_o we_o find_v that_o the_o most_o sacred_a humanity_n also_o of_o christ_n our_o lord_n do_v accompany_v we_o to_o do_v we_o favour_n my_o ghostly_a father_n than_o ask_v i_o this_o question_n who_o tell_v you_o that_o it_o be_v jesus_n christ_n himself_o tell_v i_o so_o answer_v i_o and_o that_o many_o time_n but_o yet_o even_o before_o he_o tell_v i_o so_o it_o be_v he_o print_v upon_o my_o understanding_n that_o it_o be_v he_o yea_o and_o even_o before_o this_o he_o tell_v i_o so_o and_o yet_o still_o i_o see_v he_o not_o if_o any_o man_n who_o i_o have_v never_o see_v but_o only_o have_v hear_v news_n of_o he_o shall_v come_v to_o speak_v with_o i_o i_o be_v either_o blind_a or_o in_o the_o dark_a and_o shall_v tell_v i_o who_o he_o be_v i_o shall_v believe_v he_o and_o yet_o i_o can_v not_o so_o
resolut_o affirm_v he_o to_o be_v that_o person_n as_o if_o i_o have_v see_v he_o but_o yet_o now_o in_o this_o other_o case_n i_o can_v for_o here_o there_o be_v imprint_v so_o clear_a a_o notice_n of_o he_o in_o the_o mind_n without_o see_v he_o that_o it_o seem_v a_o kind_n of_o impossibility_n to_o doubt_v it_o for_o our_o lord_n will_v have_v it_o so_o engrave_v upon_o the_o understanding_n that_o it_o can_v no_o more_o be_v question_v then_o even_o that_o which_o we_o see_v no_o nor_o yet_o so_o much_o for_o in_o thing_n which_o we_o see_v there_o remain_v sometime_o a_o suspicion_n whether_o we_o may_v not_o have_v fancy_v such_o a_o thing_n and_o so_o mistake_v it_o but_o here_o though_o upon_o the_o sudden_a and_o as_o it_o be_v by_o way_n of_o surprise_n one_o may_v begin_v to_o fall_v upon_o a_o kind_n of_o suspicion_n or_o doubt_v yet_o still_o upon_o the_o whole_a matter_n we_o remain_v in_o so_o great_a a_o certainty_n as_o that_o the_o doubt_n continue_v not_o to_o have_v place_n and_o so_o also_o do_v it_o fall_v out_o though_o yet_o in_o a_o different_a manner_n that_o god_n instruct_v the_o soul_n &_o speak_v to_o it_o but_o yet_o without_o speak_v at_o all_o in_o such_o sort_n as_o i_o have_v already_o declare_v this_o be_v a_o certain_a kind_n of_o language_n which_o have_v so_o much_o of_o the_o celestial_a in_o it_o that_o it_o can_v well_o be_v give_v to_o be_v understand_v by_o we_o here_o how_o much_o soever_o we_o may_v desire_v it_o unless_o our_o lord_n himself_o be_v please_v to_o teach_v it_o by_o experience_n for_o our_o bless_a lord_n convey_v and_o place_n that_o in_o the_o most_o interior_a part_n of_o the_o soul_n which_o he_o be_v please_v that_o the_o same_o soul_n shall_v understand_v and_o know_v and_o there_o do_v he_o represent_v it_o without_o either_o any_o image_n of_o his_o person_n or_o any_o form_n of_o word_n but_o only_o after_o the_o way_n of_o that_o kind_n of_o vision_n which_o i_o have_v already_o touch_v and_o now_o let_v this_o manner_n of_o almighty_a god_n make_v the_o soul_n understand_v what_o he_o will_v in_o the_o way_n of_o great_a truth_n and_o mystery_n be_v much_o observe_v for_o many_o time_n that_o which_o i_o understand_v when_o our_o lord_n declare_v any_o vision_n which_o his_o divine_a majesty_n be_v please_v to_o represent_v to_o i_o be_v after_o this_o manner_n and_o i_o think_v it_o be_v in_o such_o occasion_n as_o where_o the_o devil_n be_v least_o able_a to_o intermeddle_v or_o intrude_v himself_o for_o these_o reason_n and_o if_o they_o be_v not_o find_v i_o be_o likely_a enough_o to_o be_v deceive_v now_o this_o kind_n of_o vision_n and_o language_n be_v so_o inward_o a_o thing_n of_o spirit_n that_o here_o there_o be_v no_o kind_n of_o spring_v or_o even_o stir_v in_o any_o of_o the_o power_n of_o the_o mind_n nor_o yet_o in_o any_o of_o the_o sense_n of_o the_o body_n in_o my_o opinion_n by_o which_o mean_n the_o devil_n may_v be_v able_a to_o make_v himself_o the_o gainer_n thus_o i_o say_v it_o happen_v sometime_o as_o namely_o when_o it_o last_v but_o a_o very_a little_a while_n for_o at_o some_o other_o time_n i_o think_v that_o neither_o the_o power_n of_o the_o mind_n be_v suspend_v nor_o yet_o the_o sense_n of_o the_o body_n disable_v but_o that_o they_o be_v all_o at_o home_n and_o in_o use_n the_o other_o happen_v not_o always_o in_o this_o degree_n of_o contemplation_n but_o rather_o very_o seldom_o i_o say_v that_o when_o they_o be_v so_o lose_v we_o neither_o operate_v any_o thing_n nor_o do_v any_o thing_n but_o all_o seem_v to_o be_v the_o work_n of_o our_o lord_n it_o be_v as_o when_o a_o food_n be_v already_o convey_v into_o the_o stomach_n without_o either_o our_o have_v eat_v it_o or_o so_o much_o as_o know_v who_o lay_v it_o there_o but_o only_o we_o understand_v well_o that_o there_o it_o be_v though_o in_o that_o case_n it_o be_v neither_o know_v what_o the_o food_n be_v nor_o who_o carry_v it_o thither_o but_o here_o it_o be_v very_o differet_fw-la for_o here_o the_o food_n be_v know_v though_o yet_o how_o it_o get_v thither_o i_o can_v tell_v for_o neither_o do_v i_o see_v it_o nor_o understand_v it_o nor_o be_v i_o ever_o move_v to_o desire_v it_o nor_o have_v it_o ever_o come_v to_o my_o knowledge_n before_o that_o such_o a_o thing_n can_v possible_o be_v in_o the_o speech_n upon_o which_o i_o touch_v before_o almighty_a god_n make_v the_o understanding_n observe_v and_o reflect_v upon_o that_o which_o be_v say_v whether_o it_o desire_v to_o understand_v or_o no._n for_o there_o it_o seem_v that_o the_o soul_n have_v some_o other_o kind_n of_o eat_v wherewith_o to_o hear_v &_o that_o he_o make_v she_o harken_v and_o not_o the_o while_n to_o think_v of_o somewhat_o else_o as_o if_o one_o who_o can_v hear_v well_o be_v not_o suffer_v to_o stop_n his_o ear_n and_o that_o they_o cry_v out_o aloud_o to_o he_o who_o will_v therefore_o be_v fain_o to_o hear_v they_o whether_o he_o will_v or_o no_o but_o somewhat_o in_o fine_a he_o do_v since_o he_o be_v attentive_a to_o understand_v what_o they_o say_v but_o here_o the_o soul_n do_v inst_n nothing_o for_o even_o that_o little_a which_o be_v do_v in_o the_o former_a way_n and_o which_o be_v only_o to_o harken_v be_v take_v from_o she_o now_o for_o now_o she_o find_v all_o dress_v to_o her_o hand_n yea_o and_o all_o eat_v by_o she_o too_o so_o that_o now_o there_o be_v nothing_o to_o be_v do_v by_o she_o but_o to_o enjoy_v just_o so_o as_o any_o one_o who_o without_o ever_o have_v learn_v or_o so_o much_o as_o endeavour_v to_o read_v and_o much_o more_o without_o any_o study_v at_o all_o shall_v find_v that_o whole_a science_n already_o possess_v by_o himself_o and_o that_o without_o know_v at_o all_o either_o how_o or_o whence_o it_o come_v since_o he_o have_v never_o procure_v to_o acquire_v it_o with_o so_o much_o as_o learn_v his_o a._n b._n c._n and_o this_o last_o comparison_n i_o think_v declare_v some_o part_n of_o this_o celestial_a gift_n for_o the_o soul_n find_v herself_o here_o to_o be_v grow_v wise_a upon_o a_o sudden_a and_o that_o the_o mystery_n of_o the_o most_o holy_a trinity_n and_o other_o most_o sublime_a article_n be_v so_o exact_o declare_v to_o she_o that_o there_o be_v not_o any_o theologue_n or_o divine_a in_o the_o world_n with_o who_o she_o may_v not_o adventure_v to_o dispute_v concern_v the_o truth_n of_o those_o high_a point_n the_o soul_n remain_v here_o in_o such_o a_o amazement_n that_o some_o one_o such_o favour_n as_o this_o suffice_v to_o work_v a_o total_a change_n in_o she_o and_o to_o make_v her_o love_n nothing_o but_o only_o he_o who_o without_o any_o labour_n at_o all_o of_o she_o have_v make_v her_o capable_a of_o so_o unspeakable_a blessing_n and_o to_o who_o he_o communicate_v his_o secret_n and_o who_o he_o treat_v with_o argument_n of_o so_o great_a and_o dear_a friendship_n and_o love_n that_o they_o soul_n endure_v not_o so_o much_o as_o to_o be_v write_v for_o he_o do_v some_o such_o kind_n of_o favour_n as_o may_v even_o bespeak_v a_o kind_n of_o suspicion_n and_o doubt_v in_o the_o hearer_n in_o regard_n that_o they_o be_v of_o so_o great_a admiration_n and_o have_v be_v impart_v to_o a_o person_n who_o have_v deserve_v they_o so_o very_o ill_o and_o in_o fine_a if_o we_o bring_v not_o a_o very_a livelie_a and_o even_o lusty_a faith_n with_o we_o they_o can_v be_v believe_v and_o therefore_o i_o resolve_v to_o speak_v of_o few_o of_o those_o which_o our_o lord_n have_v be_v please_v to_o vouchsafe_v i_o unless_o i_o be_v express_o command_v and_o unless_o it_o be_v of_o some_o few_o vision_n which_o perhaps_o may_v ferue_v to_o do_v good_a in_o some_o kind_n to_o the_o end_n that_o any_o such_o person_n as_o to_o who_o our_o lord_n may_v be_v please_v to_o impart_v the_o like_a may_v not_o wonder_v and_o think_v it_o impossible_a as_o i_o do_v or_o else_o that_o so_o i_o may_v declare_v the_o manner_n and_o way_n by_o which_o it_o have_v please_v our_o lord_n to_o conduct_v my_o soul_n that_o be_v the_o very_a thing_n which_o they_o have_v command_v i_o to_o write_v return_v therefore_o now_o to_o this_o manner_n of_o understand_v these_o kind_n of_o thing_n i_o think_v our_o lord_n be_v please_v that_o by_o all_o mean_n this_o soul_n of_o we_o shall_v have_v some_o notice_n here_o even_o of_o that_o which_o pass_v in_o heaven_n and_o that_o as_o soul_n do_v there_o understand_v one_o another_o real_o without_o speak_v which_o for_o my_o part_n i_o never_o know_v before_o and_o this_o be_v most_o certain_o true_a till_o our_o
a_o unsupportable_a thing_n in_o my_o opinion_n and_o indeed_o it_o be_v a_o kind_n of_o picture_n in_o little_a or_o rather_o a_o pattern_n of_o hell_n and_o this_o be_v most_o certain_o so_o as_o our_o lord_n himself_o be_v please_v to_o give_v i_o to_o understand_v once_o in_o a_o certain_a vision_n for_o here_o the_o soul_n do_v even_o burn_v herself_o up_o of_o herself_o without_o her_o know_v either_o by_o who_o or_o by_o what_o way_n she_o be_v set_v on_o fire_n or_o yet_o how_o to_o escape_v from_o thence_o or_o final_o how_o to_o quench_v it_o for_o as_o for_o seek_v to_o help_v herself_o by_o read_v she_o will_v be_v able_a to_o profit_v by_o it_o no_o more_o then_o if_o she_o can_v not_o read_v at_o all_o it_o happen_v to_o i_o one_o day_n to_o read_v the_o life_n of_o a_o saint_n so_o to_o see_v if_o i_o can_v swallow_v the_o juice_n and_o substance_n thereof_o and_o thus_o to_o comfort_v myself_o with_o the_o consideration_n of_o what_o he_o have_v suffer_v and_o so_o i_o read_v half_a a_o dozen_o line_n of_o it_o four_o or_o five_o time_n over_o and_o yet_o though_o all_o be_v write_v in_o my_o own_o mother-toung_n i_o understand_v they_o less_o in_o the_o end_n than_o i_o do_v in_o the_o beginning_n and_o so_o i_o give_v it_o over_o this_o happen_v to_o i_o many_o time_n but_o i_o more_o particular_o remember_v this_o one_o to_o apply_v ones-self_n to_o conversation_n in_o such_o time_n as_o these_o be_v yet_o worse_o for_o the_o devil_n fill_v we_o then_o with_o such_o a_o untoward_a and_o harsh_a kind_n of_o spirit_n of_o anger_n that_o it_o seem_v to_o i_o that_o i_o can_v even_o eat_v folk_n up_o since_o i_o can_v do_v nothing_o else_o yea_o and_o i_o think_v i_o acquitt_v myself_o well_o in_o that_o i_o forbear_v to_o do_v it_o and_o that_o god_n also_o show_v he_o who_o be_v in_o this_o case_n a_o particular_a favour_n in_o preserve_v he_o from_o do_v or_o say_v somewhat_o against_o his_o neighbour_n whereby_o he_o may_v prejudice_n he_o and_o offend_v almighty_a god_n and_o now_o as_o for_o go_v to_o my_o ghostly_a father_n at_o such_o time_n it_o be_v certain_a which_o i_o shall_v here_o relate_v and_o it_o have_v happen_v to_o i_o very_o often_o that_o notwithstanding_o they_o be_v some_o great_a saint_n with_o who_o i_o have_v deal_v and_o yet_o deal_v they_o utter_v such_o harsh_a word_n and_o chidd_v i_o after_o so_o sharp_a a_o manner_n that_o when_o afterward_o i_o will_v take_v occasion_n to_o repeat_v they_o in_o their_o own_o hear_n themselves_o will_v be_v even_o amaze_v at_o themselves_o and_o they_o tell_v i_o it_o be_v no_o long_o in_o their_o power_n to_o do_v otherwise_o for_o though_o they_o full_o resolve_v within_o themselves_o not_o to_o do_v it_o and_o at_o other_o time_n that_o they_o have_v not_o only_a compassion_n of_o i_o but_o even_o a_o kind_n of_o scruple_n also_o in_o themselves_o to_o treat_v i_o thus_o when_o i_o be_v so_o full_a of_o affliction_n both_o in_o body_n and_o mind_n and_o though_o they_o have_v even_o resolve_v to_o comfort_v i_o with_o much_o compassion_n and_o pity_n yet_o in_o fine_a they_o be_v not_o able_a to_o do_v it_o not_o yet_o that_o they_o give_v i_o ill_a language_n in_o such_o sort_n as_o to_o offend_v almighty_a god_n by_o it_o but_o they_o will_v use_v word_n as_o full_a of_o disgust_n as_o can_v possible_o be_v hear_v from_o ghostly_a father_n but_o belike_o they_o intend_v to_o mortifye_v i_o which_o though_o at_o other_o time_n i_o can_v pass_v over_o or_o at_o least_o endure_v yet_o then_o it_o grow_v all_o to_o be_v a_o torment_n but_o yet_o sometime_o i_o come_v also_o to_o be_v of_o opinion_n that_o even_o i_o have_v deceive_v they_o yea_o and_o myself_o will_v go_v to_o they_o and_o advise_v they_o in_o very_o great_a good_a earnest_n that_o they_o shall_v take_v heed_n of_o i_o lest_o i_o deceive_v they_o not_o but_o that_o i_o know_v well_o enough_o that_o i_o will_v not_o do_v it_o on_o set_a purpose_n and_o upon_o design_n nor_o tell_v they_o by_o any_o mean_n any_o lie_n but_o the_o truth_n be_v i_o be_v afraid_a of_o all_o thing_n there_o be_v one_o who_o hear_v of_o this_o temptation_n of_o i_o advise_v i_o not_o to_o be_v trouble_v at_o it_o for_o humour_n though_o i_o shall_v have_v a_o mind_n to_o cozen_v he_o yet_o he_o have_v wit_n enough_o to_o defend_v himself_o from_o i_o that_o which_o sometime_o give_v i_o great_a comfort_n and_o as_o it_o be_v constant_o or_o at_o least_o most_o ordinary_o be_v that_o i_o use_v to_o have_v some_o kind_n of_o respite_n after_o i_o have_v communicate_v yea_o and_o sometime_o even_o in_o approach_v to_o the_o bless_a sacrament_n at_o the_o very_a instant_n i_o shall_v grow_v so_o very_o perfect_o well_o both_o in_o body_n and_o soul_n that_o it_o do_v even_o amaze_v i_o for_o it_o seem_v to_o be_v no_o other_o thing_n then_o that_o all_o the_o darkness_n of_o my_o soul_n be_v disperse_v and_o discharge_v at_o a_o instant_n and_o that_o upon_o the_o approach_n of_o the_o sun_n i_o quick_o come_v to_o discern_v those_o foolery_n wherein_o i_o have_v find_v myself_o all_o that_o while_n at_o other_o time_n by_o the_o hear_n of_o some_o one_o word_n which_o our_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o say_v to_o i_o and_o with_o only_o express_v himself_o thus_o be_v not_o afflict_v and_o be_v not_o afraid_a as_o former_o i_o have_v relate_v i_o remain_v most_o perfect_o well_o and_o sometime_o by_o see_v some_o vision_n i_o become_v as_o if_o i_o have_v never_o feel_v any_o inconvenience_n and_o in_o those_o case_n i_o will_v be_v entertain_v and_o regal_v myself_o with_o almighty_a god_n and_o will_v even_o kind_o complain_v to_o he_o against_o himself_o for_o permit_v i_o to_o suffer_v so_o great_a torment_n though_o yet_o i_o must_v confess_v that_o he_o have_v first_o mean_v to_o make_v i_o very_o good_a amends_o because_o these_o difficulty_n do_v never_o use_v to_o arrive_v but_o after_o a_o great_a abundance_n of_o favour_n and_o i_o think_v he_o ordain_v thing_n so_o to_o the_o end_n that_o the_o soul_n may_v appear_v like_o gold_n which_o come_v refine_v and_o pure_a out_o of_o the_o crusible_a and_o that_o so_o she_o may_v see_v our_o lord_n in_o herself_o and_o then_o do_v those_o trouble_n which_o arrive_v grow_v to_o be_v account_v little_a though_o they_o seem_v insupportable_a at_o the_o time_n and_o we_o desire_v that_o we_o may_v return_v again_o to_o suffer_v if_o our_o lord_n may_v be_v serve_v the_o better_a by_o it_o yea_o and_o to_o admit_v also_o of_o more_o tribulation_n and_o persecution_n provide_v always_o that_o they_o may_v happen_v without_o offence_n of_o our_o lord_n nay_o we_o rather_o will_v rejoice_v in_o suffer_v for_o he_o for_o all_o will_n in_o the_o end_n bring_v more_o profit_n though_o yet_o for_o my_o part_n i_o can_v never_o bear_v they_o as_o i_o ought_v but_o rather_o with_o abundance_n of_o imperfection_n at_o other_o time_n these_o trouble_n will_v come_v upon_o i_o in_o other_o kind_n and_o so_o as_o that_o i_o think_v it_o be_v absolute_o a_o kind_n of_o impossible_a thing_n for_o i_o to_o think_v then_o of_o any_o thing_n which_o be_v good_a yea_o or_o so_o much_o as_o to_o desire_v to_o do_v any_o such_o thing_n for_o that_o i_o have_v both_o a_o body_n and_o a_o soul_n which_o be_v absolute_o untoward_a and_o good_a for_o nothing_o but_o at_o those_o time_n i_o be_o not_o subject_a to_o those_o other_o temptation_n and_o disquiet_v but_o only_o to_o a_o disgust_n in_o all_o thing_n though_o i_o know_v not_o why_o so_o that_o nothing_o can_v give_v contentment_n to_o my_o soul_n and_o then_o i_o will_v be_v sometime_o procure_v to_o divert_v and_o employ_v myself_o upon_o the_o perform_n of_o some_o good_a work_n in_o the_o exterior_a way_n and_o i_o will_v do_v so_o even_o half_a whether_o myself_o will_v or_o no._n but_o in_o fine_a i_o be_o come_v at_o length_n to_o know_v by_o such_o mean_n as_o these_o how_o very_o little_a any_o soul_n be_v worth_a whensoever_o the_o grace_n of_o almighty_a god_n be_v hide_v from_o she_o and_o this_o kind_n of_o consideration_n use_v not_o to_o put_v i_o to_o any_o trouble_n at_o all_o for_o the_o behold_v my_o own_o baseness_n after_o this_o manner_n be_v wont_a to_o give_v i_o a_o kind_n of_o satisfaction_n at_o other_o time_n i_o find_v myself_o so_o as_o that_o i_o be_o utter_o unable_a to_o frame_v any_o distinct_a or_o form_v conceit_n of_o almighty_a god_n nor_o indeed_o of_o any_o good_a thing_n after_o a_o staid_a manner_n nor_o be_o i_o able_a then_o to_o put_v myself_o in_o prayer_n though_o i_o
be_v never_o so_o much_o alone_o though_o yet_o i_o feel_v still_o that_o i_o know_v there_o be_v a_o god_n and_o i_o find_v also_o that_o it_o be_v my_o imagination_n and_o my_o understanding_n which_o do_v i_o so_o much_o hurt_v in_o these_o occasion_n and_o cafe_v for_o as_o for_o my_o will_n i_o think_v it_o stand_v right_a in_o i_o and_o that_o it_o be_v dispose_v to_o all_o goodness_n but_o this_o understanding_n of_o i_o be_v so_o entire_o lose_v that_o it_o seem_v to_o be_v no_o other_o thing_n than_o some_o furious_a and_o mad_a kind_n of_o fool_n who_o no_o body_n be_v able_a to_o bind_v nor_o be_o i_o so_o far_a mistress_n thereof_o as_o that_o i_o can_v make_v it_o quiet_a for_o one_o credo_fw-la sometime_o i_o fall_v on_o laugh_v and_o yet_o then_o do_v i_o know_v my_o misery_n and_o stand_v look_v upon_o my_o soul_n and_o permit_v she_o to_o do_v what_o she_o will_v and_o yet_o our_o lord_n be_v thank_v she_o never_o by_o any_o mean_n apply_v herself_o to_o any_o thing_n which_o be_v ill_a but_o only_o about_o thing_n which_o be_v indifferent_a if_o there_o be_v any_o thing_n which_o may_v occur_v to_o be_v do_v either_o here_o or_o there_o or_o any_o where_o else_o but_o thus_o i_o come_v to_o know_v better_o the_o incomparable_a mercy_n which_o our_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o show_v i_o upon_o his_o tying-up_a this_o mad_a fool_n when_o we_o be_v in_o perfect_a contemplation_n and_o here_o i_o consider_v what_o will_v become_v of_o i_o if_o such_o person_n as_o hold_v i_o now_o for_o good_a can_v discern_v i_o to_o have_v these_o idleness_n and_o impertinency_n which_o i_o have_v describe_v here_o but_o now_o i_o have_v very_o great_a compassion_n of_o a_o soul_n to_o find_v she_o in_o so_o ill_a company_n as_o this_o i_o will_v fain_o see_v she_o rather_o in_o liberty_n and_o i_o express_v myself_o in_o this_o manner_n to_o our_o bless_a lord_n when_o o_o my_o god_n shall_v i_o arrive_v to_o see_v my_o soul_n all_o conjoin_a and_o unite_v together_o in_o celebrate_v thy_o praise_n that_o so_o all_o the_o power_n thereof_o may_v admire_v thou_o permit_v not_o heerafrer_n o_o lord_n that_o she_o wander_v up_o and_o down_o by_o piece_n for_o now_o it_o seem_v no_o otherwise_o then_o as_o if_o every_o one_o of_o the_o same_o power_n be_v run_v up_o and_o down_o in_o a_o several_a way_n these_o thing_n pass_v thus_o very_o often_o and_o i_o understand_v also_o very_o well_o that_o sometime_o the_o little_a corporal_a health_n i_o have_v contribute_v much_o to_o these_o inconvenience_n i_o also_o reflect_v much_o by_o these_o occasion_n upon_o the_o hurt_n which_o the_o sin_n of_o our_o first_o parent_n have_v do_v we_o for_o i_o think_v it_o be_v grow_v from_o thence_o that_o we_o be_v incapable_a to_o enjoy_v so_o great_a a_o good_a and_o my_o own_o sin_n be_v a_o great_a part_n of_o the_o cause_n for_o certain_o if_o i_o have_v not_o commit_v so_o many_o i_o shall_v have_v remain_v more_o entire_a and_o free_a towards_o the_o do_n of_o good_a i_o be_v subject_a also_o by_o time_n to_o another_o very_a great_a inconvenience_n for_o conceave_a that_o i_o understand_v all_o the_o book_n that_o treat_v of_o prayer_n which_o i_o come_v to_o read_v and_o that_o already_o our_o bless_a lord_n have_v do_v i_o some_o such_o kind_n of_o favour_n as_o that_o i_o need_v they_o not_o for_o this_o reason_n i_o do_v not_o read_v they_o but_o apply_v myself_o to_o read_v the_o live_v of_o saint_n and_o find_v myself_o also_o very_o short_a in_o that_o wherein_o they_o have_v so_o heroical_o serve_v almighty_a god_n this_o seem_v to_o do_v i_o good_a and_o give_v i_o strength_n but_o yet_o i_o think_v this_o be_v a_o sign_n of_o little_a humility_n for_o i_o to_o think_v that_o i_o be_v already_o arrive_v to_o hold_v that_o degree_n of_o prayer_n and_o not_o be_v able_a to_o quiet_v myself_o otherwise_o i_o continue_v much_o in_o pain_n till_o certain_a learned_a man_n and_o particular_o that_o bless_a creature_n fray_n pedro_fw-la de_fw-fr alcantara_n declare_v to_o i_o that_o i_o be_v not_o to_o be_v trouble_v at_o that_o i_o be_o not_o ignorant_a that_o in_o the_o serve_v of_o almighty_a god_n i_o have_v not_o yet_o so_o much_o as_o begin_v though_o yet_o the_o way_n which_o his_o divine_a majesty_n have_v hold_v in_o do_v i_o favour_n be_v the_o same_o which_o he_o have_v use_v towards_o such_o as_o be_v good_a whereas_o for_o my_o part_n i_o be_o no_o more_o than_o a_o direct_a downright_a mere_a imperfection_n unless_o it_o be_v in_o my_o desire_n to_o love_v he_o for_o in_o this_o indeed_o i_o see_v well_o that_o our_o lord_n have_v do_v i_o favour_n that_o so_o i_o may_v perform_v some_o little_a thing_n for_o he_o i_o confess_v i_o think_v i_o love_v he_o but_o my_o action_n and_o the_o many_o imperfection_n which_o i_o discern_v therein_o give_v i_o great_a discomfort_n at_o other_o time_n my_o soul_n fall_v into_o a_o kind_n of_o foolery_n for_o so_o it_o be_v when_o i_o think_v i_o do_v neither_o good_a nor_o ill_a but_o follow_v on_o after_o the_o walk_n of_o other_o folk_n and_o this_o neither_o with_o pain_n nor_o glory_n nor_o with_o thought_n of_o life_n or_o death_n nor_o gust_n nor_o trouble_n yea_o i_o think_v she_o feel_v nothing_o at_o all_o but_o rather_o seem_v to_o i_o to_o walk_v on_o like_o some_o little_a ass_n who_o seed_n and_o sustain_v himself_o because_o they_o give_v he_o somewhat_o to_o eat_v and_o he_o eat_v almost_o without_o think_v what_o he_o be_v do_v for_o the_o soul_n when_o she_o be_v in_o this_o state_n be_v not_o likely_a to_o be_v without_o feed_v upon_o some_o great_a favour_n of_o almighty_a god_n since_o she_o be_v not_o trouble_v with_o live_v in_o so_o miserable_a a_o life_n as_o this_o but_o pass_v through_o it_o with_o patience_n and_o equality_n of_o mind_n but_o yet_o these_o motion_n and_o effect_n be_v not_o find_v by_o she_o in_o such_o sort_n as_o that_o the_o soul_n be_v make_v to_o understand_v herself_o by_o they_o 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they_o will_v not_o hold_v he_o in_o account_n because_o his_o seem_a to_o be_v so_o powerful_a depend_v not_o upon_o the_o inward_a and_o innate_a dignity_n of_o his_o person_n but_o his_o state_n be_v derive_v to_o he_o from_o other_o but_o o_o thou_o my_o lord_n and_o my_o king_n that_o i_o be_v able_a now_o to_o represent_v that_o majesty_n which_o thou_o have_v for_o it_o be_v impossible_a to_o forbear_v to_o see_v that_o thou_o be_v the_o great_a emperor_n of_o the_o whole_a world_n in_o thyself_o and_o that_o thy_o majesty_n do_v even_o astonish_v the_o beholder_n but_o yet_o it_o put_v i_o to_o more_o amazement_n o_o my_o lord_n to_o see_v in_o company_n thereof_o the_o great_a humility_n and_o love_n which_o thou_o bear_v to_o such_o a_o wretched_a creature_n as_o myself_o for_o we_o may_v ever_o speak_v and_o treat_v with_o thou_o about_o all_o thing_n even_o as_o we_o will_v ourselves_o when_o once_o we_o shall_v have_v lose_v that_o first_o amazement_n and_o fear_v to_o see_v the_o majesty_n of_o thy_o presence_n though_o yet_o then_o we_o shall_v have_v more_o fear_n to_o offend_v thou_o then_o to_o see_v thou_o yea_o and_o yet_o even_o that_o not_o so_o much_o for_o be_v o_o lord_n afraid_a of_o thy_o punishment_n for_o we_o do_v not_o esteem_v that_o at_o all_o as_o in_o respect_n of_o the_o misery_n which_o it_o be_v to_o loose_v thy_o very_a self_n behold_v here_o the_o benefit_n of_o this_o vision_n beside_o many_o other_o great_a one_o which_o it_o leave_v in_o the_o soul_n and_o if_o it_o be_v of_o almighty_a god_n it_o make_v itself_o be_v understand_v by_o
this_o light_n nor_o yet_o of_o any_o other_o thing_n at_o all_o which_o our_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o give_v i_o to_o understand_v and_o that_o with_o such_o a_o sovereign_a kind_n of_o delight_n as_o can_v possible_o be_v declare_v for_o all_o our_o sense_n enjoy_v such_o a_o superior_a degree_n of_o sweetness_n that_o it_o can_v no_o way_n be_v full_o express_v and_o therefore_o i_o think_v it_o will_v be_v best_a to_o say_v no_o more_o i_o have_v once_o be_v above_o a_o hour_n in_o this_o condition_n when_o our_o lord_n show_v i_o admirable_a thing_n and_o seem_v not_o to_o depart_v from_o be_v near_o i_o he_o speak_v these_o very_a word_n to_o i_o see_v here_o my_o daughter_n what_o they_o lose_v who_o be_v against_o i_o &_o do_v not_o thou_o forbear_v to_o let_v they_o know_v it_o but_o o_o my_o dear_a lord_n what_o good_a will_v my_o say_n it_o do_v to_o they_o who_o their_o own_o action_n blind_a so_o deep_o if_o thy_o divine_a majesty_n do_v not_o give_v they_o light_v some_o there_o be_v to_o who_o thou_o have_v give_v it_o and_o they_o have_v profit_v much_o by_o know_v those_o greatness_n of_o thou_o but_o yet_o o_o my_o lord_n they_o see_v in_o such_o sort_n withal_o that_o they_o be_v show_v to_o such_o a_o wretched_a and_o miserable_a thing_n as_o myself_o that_o i_o can_v but_o esteem_v it_o a_o strange_a thing_n to_o find_v that_o any_o creature_n shall_v believe_v i_o bless_a be_v thy_o name_n and_o thy_o mercy_n for_o at_o least_o i_o have_v plain_o see_v a_o evident_a amendment_n in_o my_o own_o soul_n and_o i_o will_v be_v glad_a if_o i_o may_v still_o remain_v there_o and_o not_o come_v back_o to_o live_v here_o any_o more_o for_o the_o contempt_n wherein_o i_o hold_v this_o whole_a world_n be_v very_o great_a and_o it_o seem_v to_o be_v no_o better_o than_o even_o dung_n to_o i_o and_o now_o i_o find_v how_o base_o we_o be_v employ_v who_o be_v detain_v therein_o whilst_o i_o remain_v with_o that_o lady_n of_o who_o i_o speak_v before_o 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deprive_v i_o of_o the_o memory_n of_o those_o other_o treasure_n but_o now_o this_o kind_n of_o favour_n give_v so_o great_a a_o dominion_n to_o the_o soul_n that_o i_o know_v not_o whether_o it_o can_v possible_o be_v understand_v but_o only_o by_o such_o person_n as_o possess_v it_o for_o it_o be_v the_o proper_a true_a and_o natural_a discharge_n and_o unty_v of_o the_o soul_n from_o all_o thing_n create_v and_o this_o grow_v absolute_o without_o any_o labour_n of_o our_o own_o and_o almighty_a god_n do_v it_o all_o and_o then_o his_o divine_a majesty_n show_v these_o truth_n and_o that_o so_o as_o to_o make_v they_o remain_v imprint_v and_o engrave_v in_o the_o soul_n and_o they_o serve_v also_o to_o make_v we_o see_v clear_o that_o it_o be_v not_o possible_a for_o we_o to_o acquire_v they_o especial_o in_o so_o short_a a_o time_n by_o any_o diligence_n of_o our_o own_o upon_o this_o i_o also_o come_v to_o have_v very_o little_a fear_n of_o death_n which_o former_o have_v be_v great_a in_o i_o but_o now_o it_o be_v grow_v to_o seem_v to_o be_v a_o thing_n of_o very_a much_o facility_n and_o ease_n for_o such_o as_o apply_v themselves_o to_o the_o service_n of_o almighty_a god_n for_o by_o death_n the_o soul_n fly_v out_o of_o prison_n in_o one_o moment_n and_o be_v not_o only_o put_v present_o into_o liberty_n but_o enjoy_v a_o everlasting_a rest_n and_o glory_n now_o this_o way_n which_o be_v hold_v by_o almighty_a god_n in_o carry_v the_o spirit_n up_o to_o show_v she_o so_o excellent_a thing_n in_o these_o rapt_n seem_v to_o bear_v a_o very_a close_a kind_n of_o conformity_n with_o the_o passage_n of_o a_o soul_n out_o of_o a_o body_n at_o the_o hour_n of_o death_n since_o it_o grow_v even_o at_o one_o instant_a to_o be_v so_o entire_o inpossession_n of_o this_o eternal_a good_n but_o here_o i_o lay_v aside_o the_o consideration_n of_o those_o sorrow_n and_o pain_n which_o be_v feel_v when_o the_o soul_n be_v tear_v out_o of_o the_o body_n for_o we_o be_v to_o make_v little_a account_n of_o that_o and_o they_o also_o who_o love_n god_n in_o good_a earnest_n and_o have_v shake_v hand_n with_o all_o the_o contentment_n of_o this_o life_n be_v certain_o wont_a to_o die_v with_o more_o sweetness_n it_o also_o seem_v to_o i_o that_o these_o favour_n do_v i_o very_o much_o good_a towards_o the_o bring_v i_o into_o a_o knowledge_n of_o our_o true_a country_n and_o to_o see_v that_o we_o be_v mere_a pilgrim_n here_o and_o it_o be_v a_o precious_a kind_n of_o thing_n to_o find_v what_o pass_v there_o above_o and_o to_o understand_v where_o in_o fine_a we_o be_v to_o live_v for_o ever_o and_o whensoever_o one_o go_v to_o settle_v and_o stay_v for_o good_a and_o all_o in_o any_o country_n it_o give_v a_o great_a assistance_n towards_o the_o endure_a all_o the_o incommodity_n of_o the_o journey_n when_o we_o know_v that_o the_o end_n of_o it_o be_v to_o be_v such_o as_o that_o we_o may_v in_o fine_a be_v in_o great_a repose_n and_o happiness_n when_o we_o get_v thither_o it_o be_v also_o here_o obtain_v that_o with_o case_n we_o may_v grow_v able_a to_o consider_v heavenly_a thing_n that_o so_o our_o conversation_n may_v be_v there_o and_o this_o be_v a_o great_a kind_n of_o gain_n since_o the_o only_o think_v of_o heaven_n recollect_n the_o soul_n in_o regard_n that_o our_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o show_v we_o somewhat_o which_o pass_v there_o we_o be_v induce_v to_o pause_v and_o think_v upon_o it_o and_o sometime_o it_o so_o fall_v out_o that_o they_o who_o i_o know_v to_o live_v there_o be_v the_o soul_n who_o accompany_v i_o and_o in_o who_o i_o receive_v most_o comfort_n and_o these_o indeed_o be_v they_o who_o seem_v to_o be_v true_o alive_a and_o those_o other_o on_o the_o other_o side_n who_o live_v here_o seem_v to_o be_v so_o very_o deadly_a dead_a as_o that_o this_o whole_a world_n put_v together_o can_v amount_v to_o be_v any_o company_n at_o all_o for_o i_o and_o especial_o when_o i_o find_v any_o of_o these_o impulse_n or_o impetuosity_n in_o myself_o the_o whole_a world_n seem_v to_o be_v but_o a_o very_a dream_n and_o all_o the_o object_n of_o these_o corporeal_a eye_n of_o i_o a_o mere_a jest_n and_o toy_n but_o that_o which_o already_o i_o have_v see_v with_o the_o eye_n of_o my_o soul_n that_o i_o say_v be_v the_o thing_n which_o she_o desire_v and_o because_o she_o find_v herself_o to_o be_v yet_o far_o off_o from_o thence_o this_o be_v that_o which_o be_v no_o less_o than_o even_o death_n itself_o to_o my_o soul_n in_o fine_a the_o favour_n be_v excessive_o great_a which_o our_o lord_n vouchsafe_v to_o that_o soul_n to_o who_o he_o give_v such_o vision_n as_o these_o for_o they_o help_v she_o much_o in_o all_o thing_n and_o particular_o to_o the_o carry_v of_o a_o certain_a heavy_a cross_n which_o lie_v upon_o she_o for_o nothing_o can_v satisfy_v she_o now_o but_o every_o thing_n disgust_n and_o check_v she_o and_o if_o our_o bless_a lord_n do_v not_o give_v way_n that_o we_o may_v forget_v it_o sometime_o though_o yet_o we_o remember_v it_o again_o afterward_o i_o know_v not_o how_o we_o shall_v be_v able_a to_o live_v let_v he_o be_v bless_v and_o praise_v for_o all_o eternity_n and_o i_o humble_o beg_v of_o his_o divine_a majesty_n even_o by_o that_o very_a precious_a blood_n which_o his_o own_o son_n shed_v for_o i_o that_o since_o he_o have_v vouchsafe_v that_o i_o shall_v understand_v somewhat_o of_o these_o benefit_n and_o blessing_n and_o that_o i_o shall_v begin_v to_o enjoy_v they_o also_o in_o some_o kind_n even_o in_o this_o life_n it_o
not_o overshadow_v and_o even_o hide_v thy_o greatness_n who_o will_v ever_o presume_v to_o approach_v so_o often_o as_o we_o do_v towards_o the_o join_n of_o such_o wretched_a and_o filthy_a thing_n as_o we_o be_v to_o so_o high_a a_o majesty_n as_o thou_o but_o bless_a be_v thou_o for_o ever_o my_o dear_a lord_n and_o let_v the_o angel_n vea_o and_o all_o creature_n praise_n and_o glorifye_v thy_o holy_a name_n who_o do_v so_o measure_v and_o weigh_v thing_n out_o together_o with_o our_o great_a weakness_n as_o that_o we_o may_v be_v able_a to_o enjoy_v those_o sovereign_a favour_n of_o thou_o without_o be_v fright_v by_o thy_o infinite_a power_n though_o yet_o we_o be_v so_o miserable_a and_o unworthy_a creature_n i_o think_v it_o may_v happen_v to_o we_o here_o as_o once_o it_o do_v to_o another_o and_o this_o i_o know_v to_o be_v true_a a_o certain_a labouring-man_n find_v a_o treasure_n and_o the_o same_o fall_v out_o to_o be_v great_a than_o can_v get_v room_n in_o his_o straight_a and_o narrow-hart_n he_o come_v to_o have_v this_o treasure_n in_o his_o power_n grow_v withal_o to_o have_v such_o a_o melancholy_n in_o his_o mind_n that_o he_o come_v by_o little_a and_o little_a to_o die_v by_o the_o very_a care_n and_o affliction_n of_o his_o thought_n for_o not_o know_v what_o he_o be_v best_a to_o do_v with_o his_o treasure_n whereas_o if_o he_o have_v not_o find_v it_o all_o together_o but_o that_o some_o one_o have_v give_v it_o he_o by_o little_a and_o little_a accommodate_v he_o and_o sustain_v he_o by_o degree_n the_o poor_a man_n will_v have_v live_v content_v and_o it_o will_v never_o have_v cost_v he_o his_o life_n o_o thou_o who_o be_v the_o riches_n of_o the_o poor_a and_o how_o admirable_o do_v thou_o know_v how_o to_o sustain_v soul_n and_o how_o careful_a be_v thou_o to_o show_v they_o treasure_n by_o little_a and_o little_a and_o that_o they_o may_v not_o see_v too_o much_o at_o once_o when_o i_o see_v so_o great_a a_o majesty_n as_o thou_o dissemble_v as_o it_o be_v and_o disguised_z in_o so_o small_a a_o thing_n as_o the_o sacred_a host_n it_o be_v true_a that_o in_o these_o latter_a time_n and_o since_o i_o have_v be_v partaker_n of_o these_o vision_n i_o be_o even_o in_o admiration_n at_o so_o great_a a_o wisdom_n nor_o do_v i_o know_v how_o our_o lord_n give_v i_o strength_n and_o courage_n to_o approach_v it_o but_o if_o he_o who_o have_v do_v i_o and_o do_v i_o still_o so_o great_a favour_n do_v not_o govern_v i_o also_o herein_o it_o be_v not_o possible_a that_o i_o can_v dissemble_v the_o matter_n any_o long_o but_o must_v cry_v out_o and_o that_o aloud_o at_o the_o sight_n of_o so_o great_a wonder_n as_o these_o and_o what_o now_o be_v it_o then_o that_o so_o miserable_a a_o creature_n and_o so_o load_v with_o abomination_n as_o i_o be_o and_o who_o have_v spend_v my_o whole_a life_n in_o so_o little_a fear_n of_o almighty_a god_n aught_o to_o find_v with_o all_o reason_n in_o herself_o to_o see_v that_o she_o approach_v so_o great_a a_o majesty_n even_o when_o he_o be_v please_v that_o my_o soul_n shall_v behold_v he_o with_o her_o very_a eye_n how_o shall_v this_o mouth_n of_o i_o which_o have_v utter_v so_o many_o word_n against_o the_o service_n of_o that_o very_a lord_n himself_o presume_v to_o touch_v that_o most_o glorious_a body_n of_o he_o so_o full_a of_o piety_n and_o purity_n since_o the_o love_n which_o that_o divine_a countenance_n of_o so_o much_o beauty_n suavitie_n and_o affability_n discover_v to_o we_o do_v more_o afflict_v and_o wound_v the_o soul_n then_o do_v even_o that_o fear_n and_o terror_n which_o be_v breed_v in_o we_o by_o the_o consideration_n of_o his_o high_a majesty_n but_o what_o then_o shall_v i_o feel_v in_o myself_o who_o have_v see_v all_o this_o whereof_o i_o speak_v two_o several_a time_n i_o be_o real_o about_o to_o say_v o_o thou_o my_o dear_a lord_n and_o the_o very_a glory_n of_o my_o soul_n that_o i_o have_v in_o some_o kind_n do_v thou_o service_n by_o the_o great_a affliction_n which_o my_o soul_n have_v feel_v in_o herself_o and_o yet_o alas_o alas_o i_o can_v hardly_o tell_v even_o what_o i_o say_v who_o be_o in_o effect_n write_v this_o without_o know_v almost_o what_o i_o do_v for_o i_o find_v that_o i_o be_o all_o trouble_a yea_o and_o half_a beside_o myself_o when_o i_o go_v back_o to_o bring_v these_o thing_n to_o my_o remembrance_n though_o i_o may_v seem_v to_o have_v some_o little_a reason_n for_o what_o i_o say_v and_o that_o i_o have_v do_v some_o little_a thing_n for_o thy_o service_n o_o my_o lord_n &_o my_o god_n but_o since_o i_o be_o not_o the_o owner_n of_o so_o much_o as_o one_o good_a thought_n if_o thou_o impart_v it_o not_o to_o i_o there_o be_v nothing_o for_o which_o i_o can_v pretend_v to_o be_v thank_v but_o i_o be_o still_o the_o debtor_n o_o my_o lord_n and_o still_o thou_o be_v the_o party_n offend_v go_v one_o day_n to_o receive_v the_o b._n sacrament_n i_o see_v two_o divelis_n with_o the_o eye_n of_o my_o soul_n more_o clear_o then_o if_o i_o have_v see_v they_o with_o the_o eye_n of_o my_o body_n in_o a_o most_o abominable_a figure_n and_o i_o think_v their_o horn_n do_v encompass_v the_o very_a throat_n of_o a_o certain_a poor_a priest_n and_o i_o see_v also_o my_o lord_n with_o that_o great_a majesty_n whereof_o i_o have_v speak_v place_v in_o those_o hand_n of_o that_o priest_n which_o he_o be_v go_v to_o minister_v to_o i_o with_o the_o same_o sinful_a hand_n of_o he_o for_o i_o understand_v that_o soul_n to_o be_v then_o in_o the_o state_n of_o mortal_a sinne._n but_o now_o what_o kind_n of_o object_n must_v it_o be_v to_o see_v thy_o beauty_n o_o my_o lord_n in_o the_o midst_n of_o so_o abominable_a figure_n those_o devil_n be_v as_o all_o amaze_a and_o fright_v in_o thy_o presence_n and_o willing_o enough_o will_v have_v be_v go_v from_o thence_o if_o they_o can_v have_v get_v thy_o leave_n this_o give_v i_o such_o a_o excessive_a trouble_n that_o i_o know_v not_o how_o i_o shall_v be_v able_a to_o communicate_v through_o the_o great_a fear_n wherein_o i_o be_v as_o conceave_a that_o if_o it_o have_v be_v a_o true_a vision_n his_o divine_a majesty_n will_v never_o have_v permit_v that_o i_o shall_v discern_v the_o misery_n wherein_o that_o poor_a soul_n remain_v the_o same_o dear_a lord_n of_o i_o command_v i_o to_o pray_v for_o that_o soul_n and_o tell_v i_o that_o he_o have_v suffer_v what_o i_o have_v see_v to_o the_o end_n that_o i_o may_v know_v of_o how_o great_a power_n and_o force_n the_o word_n of_o consecration_n be_v and_o that_o almighty_a god_n will_v not_o be_v keep_v from_o thence_o how_o wicked_a soever_o that_o priest_n shall_v be_v who_o pronounce_v they_o and_o to_o the_o end_n that_o i_o may_v also_o discern_v his_o great_a goodness_n in_o not_o forbear_v to_o put_v himself_o into_o the_o hand_n even_o of_o his_o great_a enemy_n for_o the_o good_a both_o of_o i_o and_o of_o all_o man_n and_o i_o also_o understand_v thereby_o how_o much_o more_o priest_n be_v oblige_v to_o be_v virtuous_a and_o good_a than_o other_o man_n and_o how_o terrible_a a_o thing_n it_o be_v to_o take_v the_o b._n sacrament_n unworthy_o and_o how_o absolute_a a_o lord_n the_o devil_n be_v of_o any_o soul_n which_o be_v in_o mortal_a sinne._n in_o fine_a this_o passage_n do_v i_o a_o great_a deal_n of_o good_a and_o give_v i_o a_o most_o particular_a knowledge_n of_o the_o very_a great_a obligation_n wherein_o i_o be_v to_o almighty_a god_n and_o let_v he_o be_v bless_v and_o praise_v for_o all_o eternity_n amen_n another_o time_n i_o happen_v to_o see_v another_o thing_n which_o amaze_v i_o extreme_o i_o be_v in_o a_o certain_a place_n where_o a_o certain_a person_n die_v who_o have_v live_v very_o ill_a and_o that_o many_o year_n but_o during_o two_o of_o they_o he_o have_v be_v sick_a and_o in_o some_o thing_n he_o also_o seem_v to_o be_v reform_v this_o man_n die_v without_o confession_n but_o still_o it_o seem_v to_o i_o that_o he_o be_v not_o to_o be_v damn_v though_o yet_o whilst_o man_n be_v shroud_a he_o and_o prepare_v he_o for_o burial_n i_o see_v many_o devil_n possess_v themselves_o of_o that_o body_n and_o they_o seem_v as_o it_o be_v to_o play_v with_o it_o and_o yet_o withal_o they_o use_v diverse_a cruelty_n upon_o it_o for_o they_o do_v with_o certain_a great_a hook_n both_o tear_n and_o toss_v it_o from_o one_o to_o another_o and_o this_o strike_v i_o into_o a_o very_a great_a fear_n when_o afterward_o i_o see_v he_o carry_v to_o be_v bury_v with_o all_o the_o ceremony_n and_o
and_o i_o believe_v it_o have_v be_v more_o than_o a_o month_n wherein_o i_o do_v almost_o nothing_o else_o but_o beg_v of_o almighty_a god_n that_o he_o will_v bring_v this_o soul_n back_o to_o himself_o and_o be_v in_o prayer_n one_o day_n i_o see_v a_o devil_n hard_a by_o i_o with_o certain_a paper_n in_o his_o hand_n which_o he_o be_v tear_v and_o he_o seem_v to_o be_v in_o a_o very_a great_a rage_n but_o this_o put_v i_o into_o much_o comfort_n because_o i_o conceive_v thereby_o that_o my_o suit_n be_v grant_v and_o so_o it_o be_v as_o i_o come_v to_o know_v afterward_o for_o the_o party_n have_v be_v at_o confession_n and_o have_v do_v it_o with_o great_a contrition_n and_o he_o return_v in_o so_o very_o good_a earnest_n to_o almighty_a god_n that_o i_o hope_v in_o his_o divine_a majesty_n he_o will_v ever_o go_v advance_v in_o his_o service_n and_o let_v he_o be_v bless_v for_o ever_o amen_n in_o this_o particular_a of_o procure_v our_o bless_a lord_n to_o bring_v soul_n out_o of_o grievous_a sin_n upon_o my_o humble_a suit_n and_o of_o other_o who_o be_v bring_v many_o time_n to_o more_o perfection_n and_o of_o fre_a soul_n also_o out_o of_o purgatory_n and_o of_o do_v other_o thing_n also_o of_o great_a importance_n the_o favour_n of_o our_o bless_a lord_n have_v be_v so_o great_a that_o i_o shall_v both_o weary_a myself_o and_o my_o reader_n if_o i_o will_v pretend_v to_o relate_v they_o and_o these_o thing_n have_v happen_v often_o to_o i_o for_o the_o benefit_n of_o soul_n then_o of_o body_n and_o this_o be_v so_o very_o well_o know_v that_o it_o have_v many_o witness_n but_o then_o instant_o there_o grow_v a_o kind_n of_o scruple_n upon_o i_o since_o i_o can_v not_o choose_v but_o believe_v that_o our_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o do_v diverse_a thing_n through_o my_o prayer_n for_o in_o this_o case_n and_o at_o this_o time_n i_o abstract_n from_o his_o goodness_n and_o mercy_n which_o be_v ever_o the_o chief_n cause_n of_o all_o thing_n but_o for_o the_o rest_n these_o be_v now_o so_o many_o particular_n and_o so_o well_o know_v by_o other_o that_o i_o have_v no_o difficulty_n at_o all_o to_o believe_v they_o and_o i_o bless_v his_o divine_a majesty_n for_o the_o same_o and_o they_o put_v i_o to_o great_a confusion_n because_o i_o still_o find_v myself_o to_o be_v more_o and_o more_o a_o debtor_n but_o that_o consideration_n make_v my_o desire_n to_o serve_v he_o increase_n and_o revive_v my_o love_n and_o which_o yet_o amaze_v i_o more_o those_o thing_n which_o our_o lord_n find_v not_o to_o be_v convenient_a i_o can_v scarce_o beg_v of_o his_o divine_a majesty_n even_o almost_o although_o i_o will_v and_o if_o i_o do_v it_o be_v with_o so_o little_a strength_n and_o spirit_n and_o care_n that_o although_o i_o will_v fain_o force_v myself_o yet_o it_o be_v even_o impossible_a for_o i_o to_o do_v it_o in_o these_o as_o i_o do_v it_o in_o those_o other_o which_o his_o divine_a majesty_n have_v a_o mind_n to_o effect_v for_o such_o i_o see_v i_o be_o able_a to_o beg_v often_o and_o that_o with_o great_a importunity_n and_o though_o i_o carry_v not_o the_o particular_a care_n of_o they_o about_o i_o yet_o i_o think_v they_o come_v before_o i_o of_o themselves_o so_o that_o the_o difference_n between_o these_o two_o way_n of_o ask_v be_v so_o very_o great_a as_o i_o be_o not_o able_a to_o declare_v for_o though_o i_o ask_v in_o one_o of_o these_o kind_n of_o thing_n wherein_o i_o forbear_v not_o to_o urge_v myself_o to_o beg_v they_o of_o our_o lord_n howsoever_o i_o feel_v not_o that_o kind_n of_o fervour_n in_o myself_o which_o i_o do_v in_o those_o other_o and_o though_o they_o chance_v to_o import_v my_o own_o particular_a very_o much_o yet_o be_v it_o in_o effect_n but_o as_o when_o a_o man_n chance_v to_o be_v toung-tyed_n who_o although_o he_o will_v fain_o speak_v yet_o he_o can_v do_v it_o and_o if_o he_o speak_v it_o be_v but_o in_o such_o sort_n as_o that_o he_o see_v it_o can_v be_v understand_v whereas_o the_o other_o be_v as_o when_o a_o man_n speak_v clear_a and_o plain_a to_o a_o man_n who_o he_o find_v very_o willing_a to_o hear_v he_o or_o else_o let_v we_o say_v that_o one_o of_o those_o favour_n be_v beg_v as_o by_o a_o vocal_a prayer_n and_o the_o other_o as_o in_o a_o way_n of_o contemplation_n which_o be_v so_o very_o sublime_a that_o our_o lord_n represent_v himself_o in_o such_o sort_n as_o that_o we_o understand_v that_o he_o understand_v we_o and_o that_o his_o divine_a majesty_n be_v joy_v to_o see_v that_o we_o beg_v any_o thing_n of_o he_o that_o so_o he_o may_v do_v we_o favour_n bless_a be_v he_o for_o ever_o who_o give_v we_o so_o much_o and_o to_o who_o i_o give_v so_o little_a for_o what_o o_o my_o lord_n do_v any_o man_n who_o do_v not_o even_o defeat_v himself_o whole_o for_o thou_o and_o yet_o how_o much_o how_o much_o how_o much_o and_o a_o thousand_o time_n more_o i_o may_v say_v how_o much_o be_o i_o want_v herein_o and_o now_o upon_o this_o reason_n i_o shall_v not_o so_o much_o as_o once_o desire_v even_o to_o live_v though_o yet_o i_o have_v other_o reason_n also_o not_o to_o desire_v it_o because_o i_o live_v not_o according_a to_o my_o obligation_n towards_o thou_o nay_o how_o full_a do_v i_o see_v myself_o of_o imperfection_n and_o with_o what_o faintness_n and_o baseness_n do_v i_o serve_v thou_o and_o real_o i_o think_v sometime_o i_o wish_v that_o i_o be_v even_o deprive_v of_o sense_n that_o so_o i_o may_v not_o understand_v so_o very_a much_o ill_n of_o myself_o as_o i_o do_v yet_o i_o beseech_v he_o to_o redress_v it_o all_o who_o know_v so_o well_o how_o to_o do_v it_o but_o i_o remember_v i_o speak_v before_o of_o my_o be_v in_o the_o house_n of_o a_o certain_a great_a lady_n where_o i_o assure_v you_o folk_n have_v good_a reason_n to_o have_v their_o wit_n well_o about_o they_o and_o always_o to_o be_v consider_v the_o vanity_n which_o worldly_a thing_n carry_v with_o they_o for_o she_o be_v a_o person_n very_o much_o esteem_v and_o very_o much_o praise_v and_o there_o be_v temptation_n enough_o towards_o less_o perfection_n through_o much_o distraction_n whereby_o one_o may_v easy_o have_v be_v shrewd_o take_v if_o i_o have_v look_v upon_o nothing_o but_o myself_o but_o he_o who_o judge_v right_o and_o look_n upon_o we_o with_o true_a sight_n indeed_o be_v careful_a not_o to_o give_v over_o the_o keep_v i_o ever_o safe_a in_o his_o hand_n and_o now_o when_o i_o be_o speak_v of_o have_v a_o true_a and_o real_a sight_n of_o thing_n i_o remember_v and_o consider_v the_o great_a trouble_n which_o any_o such_o person_n as_o who_o it_o have_v please_v almighty_a god_n to_o endue_v with_o a_o knowledge_n of_o that_o which_o indeed_o be_v truth_n must_v needs_o be_v put_v to_o when_o he_o be_v force_v to_o treat_v with_o other_o about_o thing_n which_o concern_v this_o transitory_a and_o troublesome_a world_n where_o all_fw-mi in_o fine_a be_v much_o disguise_v and_o mask_v as_o our_o lord_n himself_o tell_v i_o once_o but_o in_o the_o mean_a time_n many_o of_o those_o thing_n which_o i_o write_v here_o be_v by_o no_o mean_n of_o my_o own_o head_n but_o they_o have_v be_v tell_v i_o by_o that_o heavenly_a master_n of_o i_o and_o because_o in_o all_o those_o thing_n which_o i_o be_o wont_a to_o affirm_v after_o a_o direct_a and_o positive_a manner_n i_o use_v to_o express_v myself_o by_o these_o word_n this_o i_o understand_v or_o else_o our_o lord_n tell_v i_o this_o i_o find_v myself_o with_o a_o very_a great_a scruple_n of_o either_o add_v or_o any_o way_n alter_v so_o much_o as_o any_o one_o syllable_n thereof_o and_o so_o whensoever_o i_o do_v not_o most_o express_o remember_v every_o circumstance_n of_o any_o thing_n of_o this_o kind_n which_o be_v to_o be_v relate_v by_o i_o i_o be_o wont_a to_o deliver_v that_o always_o as_o in_o my_o own_o name_n or_o else_o because_o sometime_o they_o proceed_v from_o my_o own_o particular_a dictaman_n i_o use_v not_o to_o call_v any_o thing_n i_o which_o be_v good_a in_o itself_o because_o indeed_o i_o be_o far_o enough_o from_o be_v ignorant_a that_o any_o such_o thing_n as_o be_v in_o i_o be_v good_a but_o i_o affirm_v only_o those_o thing_n as_o in_o my_o own_o name_n and_o they_o be_v deliver_v as_o by_o myself_o which_o do_v not_o come_v into_o my_o understanding_n and_o knowledge_n by_o way_n of_o revelation_n but_o o_o my_o dear_a lord_n and_o my_o god_n and_o how_o often_o do_v it_o happen_v to_o we_o here_o that_o even_o in_o the_o most_o spiritual_a occasion_n we_o be_v resolve_v many_o
different_a kind_n be_v round_o about_o i_o which_o circle_v i_o in_o and_o it_o seem_v to_o i_o that_o cuerie_n one_o have_v offensive_a weapon_n in_o his_o hand_n wherewith_o to_o hurt_v i_o as_o lance_n sword_n and_o dagger_n and_o other_o have_v also_o long_a staff_n in_o a_o word_n i_o can_v not_o get_v from_o thence_o by_o any_o way_n or_o mean_n without_o danger_n of_o death_n especial_o be_v alone_o and_o not_o have_v any_o one_o creature_n to_o help_v i_o and_o be_v thus_o in_o so_o great_a affliction_n of_o spirit_n that_o i_o know_v not_o what_o to_o do_v i_o liftedup_a my_o eye_n towards_o heaven_n and_o see_v christ_n our_o lord_n not_o then_o in_o heaven_n but_o yet_o very_o high_a and_o far_o off_o from_o i_o in_o the_o air_n who_o reachtforth_o his_o hand_n towards_o i_o and_o favour_v i_o from_o thence_o in_o such_o sort_n that_o i_o fear_v neither_o all_o that_o other_o people_n nor_o yet_o these_o who_o all_o be_v unable_a to_o do_v i_o hurt_v how_o much_o soever_o they_o shall_v desire_v it_o this_o vision_n seem_v at_o the_o first_o sight_n to_o be_v without_o any_o fruit_n or_o good_a effect_n at_o all_o but_o it_o have_v yet_o do_v i_o a_o great_a deal_n of_o good_a because_o i_o have_v understand_v what_o it_o signify_v for_o i_o see_v myself_o in_o that_o encounter_n short_o after_o and_o know_v that_o it_o be_v nothing_o else_o but_o this_o vision_n and_o i_o also_o come_v to_o know_v it_o to_o be_v a_o very_a picture_n or_o rather_o map_n of_o the_o world_n for_o as_o many_o as_o be_v in_o it_o abstract_v ever_o from_o those_o few_o who_o apply_v themselves_o to_o do_v our_o lord_n particular_a service_n seem_v to_o carry_v arm_n against_o this_o wretched_a soul_n of_o we_o as_o namely_o honour_n estate_n delight_n and_o the_o like_a for_o it_o be_v evident_a that_o the_o soul_n be_v all_o overcast_v with_o a_o net_n before_o it_o be_v aware_a at_o least_o all_o these_o thing_n do_v the_o best_a they_o can_v to_o endanger_v and_o wrapp_v we_o up_o fast_o enough_o as_o namely_o friend_n kindred_n and_o which_o amaze_v i_o more_o even_o such_o as_o be_v virtuous_a people_n for_o i_o find_v myself_o afterward_o to_o be_v extreme_o press_v and_o even_o oppress_v by_o they_o they_o conceave_a in_o the_o mean_a time_n that_o they_o carry_v themselves_o very_o well_o but_o the_o while_n i_o know_v not_o at_o all_o either_o how_o to_o defend_v myself_o or_o what_o to_o do_v o_o my_o dear_a god_n and_o if_o now_o i_o shall_v stand_v to_o relate_v the_o kind_n and_o difference_n of_o those_o trouble_n which_o set_v upon_o i_o at_o that_o time_n even_o after_o all_o those_o other_o whereof_o i_o speak_v before_o how_o well_o may_v this_o be_v able_a to_o serve_v for_o a_o mean_n to_o make_v a_o man_n whole_o abhor_v all_o thing_n it_o be_v i_o think_v the_o very_o great_a persecution_n of_o all_o that_o ever_o i_o have_v endure_v for_o i_o feel_v myself_o at_o some_o time_n so_o straight_o set_v upon_o on_o all_o side_n that_o i_o only_o find_v remedy_n by_o lifting-up_a my_o eye_n to_o heaven_n and_o cry_v upon_o almighty_a god_n and_o i_o remember_v very_o well_o what_o i_o have_v see_v in_o this_o last_o vision_n of_o i_o and_o it_o do_v i_o a_o great_a deal_n of_o good_a towards_o a_o not_o put_v confidence_n in_o any_o creature_n for_o there_o be_v no_o one_o of_o they_o firm_a and_o stable_n but_o only_o god_n alone_o be_v entire_o and_o true_o so_o but_o in_o these_o great_a affliction_n our_o lord_n have_v ever_o use_v to_o send_v i_o some_o person_n or_o other_o who_o in_o his_o name_n may_v lend_v i_o his_o hand_n as_o he_o signify_v to_o i_o that_o he_o will_v and_o as_o he_o do_v also_o let_v i_o see_v in_o this_o last_o vision_n and_o so_o i_o tie_v not_o myself_o to_o any_o thing_n but_o only_o to_o please_v our_o bless_a lord_n and_o this_o have_v serve_v to_o sustain_v this_o poor_a little_a virtue_n which_o i_o have_v in_o desire_v to_o serve_v he_o and_o let_v he_o be_v bless_v for_o ever_o but_o find_v myself_o once_o very_o unquiet_a and_o in_o great_a disorder_n yea_o and_o in_o skirmish_n or_o rather_o in_o a_o very_a battle_n without_o be_v able_a to_o recollect_v myself_o yea_o and_o my_o thought_n be_v scatter_v and_o disperse_v upon_o thing_n which_o be_v not_o very_o perfect_a and_o withal_o not_o seem_v to_o be_v so_o utter_o untie_v from_o all_o thing_n as_o i_o use_v and_o be_v still_o so_o wicked_a as_o i_o be_v i_o grow_v afraid_a that_o the_o favour_n which_o our_o bless_a lord_n have_v do_v i_o may_v fallout_a to_o be_v illusion_n and_o in_o fine_a i_o then_o remain_v with_o a_o very_a great_a obscuritic_n of_o mind_n but_o now_o whilst_o i_o be_v in_o this_o pain_n our_o lord_n begin_v to_o speak_v to_o i_o and_o tell_v i_o that_o i_o must_v not_o be_v thus_o afflict_v but_o that_o find_v myself_o in_o that_o case_n i_o may_v well_o understand_v even_o thereby_o in_o how_o great_a misery_n i_o must_v remain_v if_o once_o he_o shall_v depart_v from_o i_o 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with_o demonstration_n of_o most_o particular_a love_n thou_o be_v now_o grow_v to_o be_v i_o and_o i_o be_o thou_o and_o those_o word_n which_o i_o be_o ever_o wont_a to_o say_v and_o to_o my_o think_n i_o say_v they_o with_o much_o truth_n be_v these_o which_o follow_v what_o care_v i_o o_o my_o lord_n for_o myself_o but_o only_o for_o thou_o but_o i_o confess_v those_o word_n of_o he_o to_o i_o be_v of_o great_a regalo_n to_o my_o hart_n though_o yet_o withal_o they_o be_v of_o excessive_a confusion_n when_o i_o remember_v what_o kind_n of_o creature_n i_o be_o but_o hart_n it_o seem_v that_o i_o have_v need_n of_o more_o courage_n for_o the_o receive_n of_o those_o high_a favour_n then_o even_o for_o the_o endure_a of_o unspeakable_a affliction_n but_o now_o when_o these_o thing_n be_v in_o motion_n all_o the_o poor_a good_a action_n of_o my_o life_n be_v utter_o forget_v by_o i_o and_o then_o it_o be_v only_o represent_v to_o my_o mind_n how_o wicked_a i_o be_o and_o that_o without_o any_o discourse_n at_o all_o of_o my_o understanding_n so_o that_o even_o this_o also_o do_v seem_v at_o certain_a time_n to_o have_v somewhat_o of_o the_o supernatural_a in_o it_o sometime_o there_o come_v also_o upon_o i_o so_o earnest_a and_o even_o eager_a appetite_n of_o receive_v the_o bless_a sacrament_n that_o i_o know_v not_o whether_o it_o can_v be_v possible_a for_o i_o to_o express_v they_o to_o the_o full_a it_o happen_v to_o i_o one_o morning_n that_o it_o rain_v so_o extreme_o as_o to_o seem_v no_o way_n fit_a for_o i_o to_o go_v out_o of_o door_n but_o yet_o be_v once_o get_v abroad_o i_o be_v already_o grow_v also_o to_o be_v so_o far_o out_o of_o myself_o through_o that_o desire_n of_o communicate_v that_o although_o they_o have_v set_v lance_n even_o point_v and_o hold_v fast_o against_o my_o very_a breast_n i_o think_v i_o can_v have_v pass_v even_o through_o they_o all_o and_o how_o much_o more_o then_o through_o water_n and_o as_o soon_o as_o i_o arrive_v at_o church_n i_o be_v take_v with_o a_o very_a great_a rapt_v for_o i_o think_v the_o very_a heaven_n be_v open_a and_o not_o by_o one_o overture_n only_o as_o i_o have_v see_v it_o at_o other_o time_n and_o i_o see_v another_o also_o above_o that_o upon_o which_o i_o understand_v by_o way_n of_o a_o certain_a notice_n which_o i_o be_o not_o able_a to_o express_v the_o divinity_n itself_o to_o be_v though_o yet_o i_o see_v not_o the_o divinity_n and_o i_o think_v it_o be_v uphold_v by_o certain_a mysterious_a beast_n and_o i_o be_v
consider_v whether_o they_o be_v not_o those_o of_o the_o evangelist_n but_o yet_o i_o neither_o see_v how_o the_o throne_n be_v seat_v nor_o who_o be_v sit_v in_o it_o but_o only_o a_o great_a multitude_n of_o angel_n about_o it_o which_o seem_v to_o i_o of_o much_o more_o beauty_n beyond_o comparison_n than_o those_o other_o which_o i_o have_v see_v in_o heaven_n before_o and_o i_o have_v be_v think_v whether_o they_o may_v not_o have_v be_v seraphin_n or_o cherubin_n for_o they_o be_v very_o different_a in_o point_n of_o glory_n and_o they_o seem_v to_o be_v mighty_o inflame_v and_o as_o for_o the_o glory_n which_o then_o i_o feel_v in_o myself_o it_o can_v neither_o be_v write_v nor_o speak_v nor_o be_v any_o one_o able_a even_o to_o think_v it_o but_o such_o as_o have_v be_v make_v partaker_n of_o it_o by_o see_v it_o but_o i_o understand_v that_o absolute_o all_o that_o which_o possible_o can_v be_v desire_v be_v there_o and_o that_o all_o together_o i_o there_o see_v nothing_o at_o all_o distinct_o but_o they_o tell_v i_o yet_o i_o know_v not_o even_o who_o they_o be_v that_o the_o thing_n which_o i_o may_v there_o be_v able_a to_o do_v be_v to_o understand_v that_o i_o can_v understand_v nothing_o but_o that_o i_o may_v see_v from_o thence_o the_o direct_a nothingnes_n of_o all_o thing_n in_o comparison_n of_o that_o and_o real_o it_o be_v very_o true_a that_o my_o soul_n from_o that_o time_n forward_o have_v find_v itself_o as_o if_o it_o be_v extreme_o affront_v and_o confound_v to_o observe_v that_o it_o be_v able_a to_o pause_v at_o all_o upon_o any_o thing_n create_v and_o how_o much_o more_o then_o to_o be_v affect_v either_o by_o it_o or_o to_o it_o for_o all_o thing_n seem_v to_o i_o ever_o since_o to_o be_v neither_o better_o nor_o more_o than_o the_o very_a nest_n of_o a_o ant._n but_o i_o communicate_v and_o be_v at_o mass_n though_o yet_o i_o know_v not_o how_o i_o can_v be_v so_o i_o conceive_v that_o the_o time_n have_v be_v very_o short_a and_o wonder_v when_o the_o clock_n strike_v and_o so_o find_v that_o it_o be_v two_o hour_n wherein_o i_o have_v remain_v in_o rapt_v and_o glory_n i_o be_v amaze_v after_o this_o to_o know_v how_o by_o approach_v so_o near_o to_o this_o fire_n which_o seem_v to_o come_v from_o above_o out_o of_o the_o true_a love_n of_o almighty_a god_n it_o be_v yet_o in_o no_o power_n of_o i_o at_o all_o to_o get_v the_o least_o spark_n thereof_o but_o only_o when_o his_o divine_a majesty_n be_v please_v to_o impart_v it_o for_o how_o much_o soever_o i_o desire_v it_o and_o how_o earnest_o soever_o i_o procure_v it_o and_o will_v defeat_v and_o even_o destroy_v myself_o for_o it_o there_o be_v yet_o no_o mean_n at_o all_o to_o obtain_v it_o but_o now_o this_o rapt_v of_o i_o seem_v even_o to_o have_v consume_v the_o fault_n and_o lukewarmnesse_n and_o misery_n of_o the_o old_a man_n as_o the_o phoenix_n be_v say_v to_o do_v herself_o out_o of_o who_o ash_n when_o she_o be_v burn_v spring_v another_o phoenix_n for_o just_a so_o do_v a_o soul_n become_v absolute_o a_o other_o kind_n of_o thing_n with_o desire_n whole_o different_a and_o with_o a_o courage_n so_o increase_v that_o now_o she_o seem_v not_o to_o be_v what_o she_o be_v before_o but_o now_o begin_v to_o walk_v with_o a_o new_a kind_n of_o purity_n in_o the_o way_n of_o our_o lord_n and_o i_o just_a then_o beseech_v his_o divine_a majesty_n that_o it_o may_v prove_v to_o be_v so_o in_o my_o case_n and_o that_o i_o may_v now_o at_o least_o begin_v as_o upon_o a_o new_a account_n to_o do_v he_o service_n he_o speak_v these_o word_n to_o i_o thou_o have_v make_v a_o good_a comparison_n and_o see_v that_o thou_o forget_v it_o not_o that_o so_o thou_o may_v ever_o procure_v to_o improve_v thyself_o and_o be_v once_o in_o the_o selfsame_a doubt_n whereof_o i_o speak_v even_o now_o whether_o these_o vision_n be_v of_o god_n or_o no_o our_o lord_n appear_v and_o speak_v these_o word_n to_o i_o with_o some_o rigour_n how_o long_o o_o you_o son_n of_o man_n will_v you_o continue_v to_o be_v hard_o of_o hart_n and_o he_o also_o will_v i_o then_o to_o examine_v myself_o well_o upon_o this_o one_o interrogatory_n whether_o i_o be_v entire_o give_v to_o he_o for_o his_o or_o no_o and_o that_o if_o i_o be_v give_v so_o and_o be_v so_o i_o shall_v believe_v that_o he_o will_v not_o suffer_v i_o to_o be_v lose_v and_o whereas_o i_o afflict_v myself_o much_o upon_o his_o utter_v that_o exclamation_n aforesaid_a he_o return_v with_o great_a tenderness_n and_o regalo_n and_o tell_v i_o that_o he_o will_v not_o have_v i_o afflict_v myself_o and_o that_o he_o know_v already_o that_o i_o for_o my_o part_n will_v not_o fail_v to_o apply_v myself_o whole_o to_o that_o which_o may_v be_v for_o his_o service_n and_o that_o so_o he_o will_v also_o do_v all_o that_o which_o i_o desire_v of_o he_o against_o illusion_n and_o so_o he_o be_v please_v to_o do_v that_o thing_n in_o particular_a which_o then_o i_o humble_o beg_v at_o his_o hand_n for_o he_o will_v i_o to_o look_v in_o upon_o the_o love_n which_o go_v increase_a daily_a in_o i_o for_o thereby_o i_o may_v best_o understand_v that_o the_o devil_n have_v no_o part_n in_o it_o and_o that_o i_o must_v not_o think_v almighty_a god_n will_v consent_v that_o the_o devil_n shall_v have_v so_o much_o power_n over_o the_o soul_n of_o his_o servant_n as_o to_o be_v able_a to_o give_v i_o such_o a_o claritie_n of_o understanding_n together_o with_o such_o a_o depth_n of_o repose_n of_o mind_n as_o i_o possess_v and_o he_o give_v i_o also_o further_o to_o understand_v that_o such_o and_o so_o many_o man_n have_v tell_v i_o that_o these_o visitation_n be_v of_o almighty_a god_n i_o shall_v do_v ill_a if_o i_o do_v not_o believe_v they_o be_v also_o another_o time_n in_o prayer_n upon_o s._n athanasius_n creed_n of_o quicumque_fw-la vult_fw-la &c_n &c_n i_o be_v give_v to_o understand_v the_o manner_n how_o there_o be_v one_o only_o god_n and_o three_o person_n and_o this_o in_o so_o perspicuous_a and_o clear_v a_o kind_n that_o i_o be_v no_o less_o comfort_v by_o it_o then_o amaze_v at_o it_o this_o also_o do_v i_o very_o much_o good_a towards_o the_o give_v i_o increase_v of_o knowledge_n concern_v the_o greatness_n of_o almighty_a god_n and_o of_o his_o wonder_n and_o for_o all_o such_o occasion_n also_o as_o wherein_o i_o think_v of_o the_o bless_a trinity_n or_o hear_v speech_n thereof_o and_o now_o i_o think_v i_o conceive_v how_o all_o that_o mystery_n stand_v very_o well_o and_o it_o content_v i_o much_o one_o day_n upon_o the_o assumption_n of_o our_o b._n lady_n the_o queen_n of_o the_o angel_n our_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o do_v i_o the_o favour_n in_o a_o certain_a rapt_v that_o her_o rise_n up_o into_o heaven_n be_v represent_v to_o i_o together_o with_o the_o solemnity_n and_o joy_n of_o that_o celestial_a court_n wherewith_o she_o be_v receive_v as_o also_o the_o place_n which_o she_o hold_v to_o tell_v what_o kind_n of_o thing_n this_o be_v i_o be_o no_o way_n able_a the_o glory_n which_o even_o my_o spirit_n have_v to_o see_v that_o she_o be_v so_o great_a be_v even_o extreme_a and_o i_o remain_v with_o great_a effect_n and_o improvement_n by_o it_o towards_o a_o wish_n of_o undergo_n yet_o great_a affliction_n for_o the_o love_n of_o our_o lord_n and_o so_o it_o also_o give_v i_o increase_v of_o desire_n to_o serve_v our_o b._n lady_n since_o both_o her_o dignity_n and_o merit_n be_v so_o great_a and_o be_v one_o day_n in_o a_o college_n of_o the_o society_n of_o jesus_n and_o the_o brother_n of_o that_o house_n be_v then_o in_o act_n of_o receive_v the_o b._n sacrament_n i_o see_v a_o very_a rich_a canopy_n over_o their_o head_n and_o this_o at_o two_o several_a time_n but_o yet_o when_o other_o communicate_v there_o i_o see_v it_o not_o the_o fourti_v chapter_n she_o proceed_v in_o the_o same_o discourse_n by_o relate_v the_o great_a favour_n which_o our_o lord_n show_v she_o whereby_o good_a instruction_n be_v to_o be_v get_v and_o with_o the_o end_n of_o this_o chapter_n she_o end_v also_o the_o discourse_n of_o her_o life_n be_v once_o in_o prayer_n the_o delight_n and_o gust_n which_o i_o feel_v within_o myself_o be_v so_o great_a and_o i_o find_v myself_o so_o unworthy_a of_o so_o high_a a_o favour_n that_o i_o begin_v upon_o that_o occasion_n to_o consider_v how_o much_o better_o i_o have_v deserve_v to_o possess_v that_o place_n in_o hell_n which_o be_v prepare_v for_o i_o for_o i_o can_v never_o forget_v in_o what_o manner_n i_o have_v see_v myself_o
near_o they_o with_o hallow_v candle_n candle_n a_o excellent_a advice_n take_v heed_n of_o this_o great_a danger_n danger_n consider_v this_o point_n much_o and_o often_o often_o note_v this_o good_a conclusion_n upon_o the_o praemise_n praemise_n note_v this_o very_o well_o for_o nothing_o import_v more_o they_o this_o this_o a_o great_a and_o gross_a error_n error_n a_o point_n of_o very_o great_a importance_n importance_n note_n note_n this_o be_v the_o beginning_n of_o many_o great_a blessing_n blessing_n her_o entrance_n into_o the_o receave_n supernatural_a favour_n favour_n it_o work_n not_o indeed_o by_o way_n of_o use_v discourse_n or_o make_v inference_n but_o yet_o it_o work_v by_o way_n of_o contemplation_n and_o admiration_n of_o the_o infinite_a object_n be_v god_n who_o be_v set_v before_o it_o it_o note_n note_n a_o great_a &_o foolish_a error_n error_n behold_v here_o the_o true_a &_o great_a impediment_n impediment_n this_o saint_n be_v admirable_a in_o all_o the_o comparison_n which_o the_o use_n use_n this_o be_v a_o kind_n of_o engine_n with_o certain_a little_a leather_n bucket_n fasten_v to_o the_o side_n of_o a_o very_a great_a wheel_n which_o dra_n be_v up_o very_o much_o water_n with_o great_a ease_n in_o spanish_a it_o be_v call_v a_o noria_n noria_n a_o good_a lesson_n lesson_n a_o consideration_n of_o much_o comfort_n comfort_n a_o hard_a question_n most_o clear_o and_o excellent_o answer_v answer_v mark_v well_o these_o masculine_a and_o massy_a word_n word_n note_n note_n this_o suspending_a of_o the_o thought_n or_o understanding_n of_o which_o the_o saint_n speak_v be_v a_o present_v a_o multitude_n of_o supernatural_a and_o divine_a object_n before_o it_o together_o with_o a_o copious_a infusion_n of_o light_n which_o be_v decern_v by_o it_o after_o a_o kind_n of_o intuitive_a way_n at_o once_o without_o discourse_n or_o trouble_v and_o this_o light_n rest_v not_o there_o but_o passes-on_a to_o the_o will_n and_o grow_n to_o be_v as_o so_o much_o fire_n for_o the_o inflame_a it_o in_o the_o love_n of_o our_o lord_n and_o the_o soul_n do_v more_o proper_o suffer_v here_o then_o act_n and_o now_o the_o saint_n give_v great_a warning_n that_o people_n be_v not_o so_o foolish_a as_o to_o offer_v at_o these_o thing_n of_o themselves_o a_o great_a truth_n truth_n a_o dangerous_a &_o proud_n foolish_a error_n error_n observe_v the_o generous_a way_n of_o this_o great_a saint_n saint_n note_v this_o very_a well_o well_o a_o great_a praise_n of_o a_o large_a hart_n hart_n how_o saint_n be_v to_o be_v imitate_v &_o how_o admire_v admire_v note_v this_o well_o well_o a_o necessary_a advice_n advice_n our_o daily_a bread_n bread_n a_o description_n of_o a_o good_a director_n in_o matter_n of_o spirit_n spirit_n note_n note_n how_o the_o will_n be_v to_o carry_v itself_o to_o the_o other_o faculty_n of_o the_o mind_n mind_n the_o blessing_n of_o quiet_a prayer_n prayer_n note_n note_n note_n note_n how_o the_o soul_n be_v to_o carry_v itself_o in_o quiet_a prayer_n prayer_n note_n note_n a_o true_a &_o happy_a comparison_n comparison_n the_o good_a spirit_n very_o easy_o discern_v from_o the_o bad_a bad_a note_v this_o point_n above_o all_o all_o a_o most_o necessary_a document_n document_n a_o great_a blessing_n by_o mean_n of_o this_o prayer_n prayer_n these_o be_v the_o more_o generous_a mind_n mind_n as_o when_o one_o be_v die_v die_v this_o be_v a_o admirable_a state_n of_o mind_n mind_n the_o true_a state_n of_o the_o power_n of_o the_o mind_n in_o this_o prayer_n how_o there_o be_v a_o union_n in_o this_o prayer_n &_o how_o there_o be_v none_o none_o the_o great_a effect_n of_o this_o high_a prayer_n prayer_n the_o difference_n betweme_v elevation_n and_o union_n union_n she_o proceed_v in_o declare_v the_o great_a effect_n of_o this_o high_a prayer_n prayer_n a_o consideration_n of_o strange_a comfort_n comfort_n this_o be_v strange_a indeed_o indeed_o the_o strong_a pillar_n of_o prayer_n 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vision_n believe_v and_o consider_v this_o most_o certain_a truth_n truth_n a_o doubt_n which_o can_v easy_o be_v solue_v solue_v she_o grow_n now_o to_o make_v serious_a enquiry_n after_o a_o good_a director_n director_n the_o only_a excellent_a course_n course_n this_o holy_a man_n enter_v often_o into_o the_o story_n of_o our_o saint_n saint_n this_o be_v no_o improbable_a opinion_n though_o it_o be_v no_o true_a one_o one_o so_o good_a a_o begin_n be_v almost_o a_o kind_n of_o perfect_v the_o work_n work_n the_o saint_n begann_v here_o to_o be_v happy_a happy_a this_o be_v a_o wise_a man_n &_o likely_a to_o work_n wonder_v upon_o a_o soul_n soul_n he_o lose_v nothing_o by_o leave_v to_o be_v a_o duke_n for_o god_n sake_n sake_n this_o must_v needs_o have_v be_v a_o holy_a and_o a_o wise_a man_n man_n a_o little_a of_o this_o go_v far_o far_o so_o true_a it_o be_v that_o god_n be_v god_n god_n the_o mighty_a force_n and_o power_n of_o any_o one_o supernatural_a word_n word_n the_o 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false_a and_o between_v a_o true_a vision_n and_o a_o fancy_n fancy_n a_o plain_a demonstration_n demonstration_n in_o order_n to_o the_o guide_v of_o other_o a_o director_n may_v easy_o have_v too_o mean_a a_o optnion_n of_o himself_o himself_o this_o saint_n be_v huge_o vex_v by_o the_o insatisfaction_n which_o she_o receive_v from_o many_o spiritual_a man_n man_n this_o be_v very_o fit_a to_o be_v know_v know_v this_o be_v a_o true_a fortiter_fw-la sed_fw-la suaviter_fw-la suaviter_fw-la this_o saint_n be_v most_o strange_o familiar_o and_o supernatural_o visit_v by_o our_o b_o lord_n lord_n a_o strange_a task_n which_o be_v put_v even_o by_o holy_a man_n upon_o this_o saint_n saint_n the_o more_o she_o be_v discountenance_v even_o by_o good_a man_n so_o much_o the_o more_o high_o be_v she_o favour_v by_o our_o lord_n lord_n a_o rare_a comparison_n comparison_n still_o more_o &_o more_o excellent_a comparison_n comparison_n a_o excellent_a &_o most_o necessary_a advice_n advice_n a_o strange_a mixture_n of_o affection_n but_o such_o as_o god_n know_v how_o to_o give_v give_v this_o grief_n be_v after_o the_o rate_n of_o the_o love_n love_n a_o very_a safe_a and_o wise_a way_n of_o proceed_v proceed_v this_o be_v a_o most_o certain_a truth_n truth_n here_o follow_v a_o whole_a world_n of_o sad_a temptation_n &_o trouble_n trouble_n the_o difference_n betweme_v divine_a and_o diabolical_a grief_n of_o mind_n mind_n the_o way_n &_o manner_n of_o a_o great_a desolation_n desolation_n a_o pretty_a humour_n humour_n a_o happy_a state_n state_n she_o make_v along_o discourse_n of_o the_o diabolical_a temptation_n &_o trouble_n to_o which_o she_o be_v subject_a subject_a the_o excellency_n of_o holy_a water_n water_n a_o great_a and_o just_a consolation_n consolation_n a_o question_n worthy_a of_o he_o that_o ask_v it_o it_o this_o be_v a_o very_a great_a truth_n but_o the_o accent_n must_v be_v put_v upon_o the_o word_n indeed_o indeed_o and_o though_o she_o shall_v have_v continue_v to_o ask_v it_o i_o dare_v say_v our_o lord_n will_v not_o have_v grant_v it_o it_o a_o must_v certain_a truth_n truth_n a_o wise_a &_o solid_a truth_n truth_n exercise_n of_o prayer_n and_o love_n of_o honour_n agree_v not_o well_o together_o together_o this_o be_v not_o to_o be_v literal_o understand_v for_o the_o devil_n can_v prepare_v no_o place_n for_o a_o soul_n in_o hell_n but_o by_o the_o decree_n of_o almighty_a god_n upon_o the_o particular_a judgement_n give_v at_o the_o death_n of_o the_o party_n party_n the_o sin_n of_o ingratitude_n discorrespondence_n and_o inordinate_a affection_n to_o creature_n which_o she_o do_v commit_v and_o the_o great_a and_o mortal_a sin_n which_o she_o will_v most_o certain_o have_v commit_v if_o the_o mercy_n of_o our_o bless_a lord_n have_v not_o prevent_v and_o withhold_v she_o she_o hell_n be_v represent_v to_o she_o in_o spirit_n after_o a_o most_o subtle_a manner_n and_o it_o be_v show_v to_o she_o and_o describe_v by_o she_o in_o such_o sort_n as_o that_o such_o creature_n may_v be_v capable_a thereof_o as_o be_v endue_v not_o only_o with_o mind_n but_o with_o body_n body_n the_o excellent_a fruit_n which_o this_o saint_n do_v gather_v from_o this_o great_a favour_n which_o seem_v to_o be_v the_o sole_a cause_n why_o our_o b._n lord_n be_v please_v to_o impair_v this_o favour_n favour_n the_o great_a benefit_n of_o this_o favour_n favour_n vide_fw-la supra_fw-la fol_n 471._o 471._o a_o sweet_a effect_n of_o a_o sad_a cause_n cause_n a_o sad_a and_o strange_a proceed_n proceed_n how_o one_o suspicion_n u._fw-mi wont_a to_o three_o itself_o close_o upon_o another_o another_o a_o holy_a &_o wise_a man_n man_n all_o these_o thing_n and_o the_o like_a as_o namely_o dart_n or_o chain_n or_o crown_n or_o jewel_n etc._n etc._n be_v not_o to_o be_v understoood_a after_o a_o gross_a &_o material_a way_n but_o yet_o that_o real_o they_o have_v truth_n in_o their_o be_v represent_v distinct_o &_o clear_o to_o the_o imagination_n of_o the_o party_n and_o they_o chief_o serve_v as_o testimony_n &_o sign_n of_o those_o interior_a grace_n &_o virtue_n which_o use_v to_o be_v imprint_v upon_o soul_n at_o those_o very_a time_n by_o the_o mercy_n of_o our_o b._n lord_n lord_n she_o mean_v herself_o herself_o this_o saint_n be_v a_o excellent_a person_n to_o make_v a_o friend_n of_o of_o a_o very_a strange_a demonstration_n of_o a_o most_o civil_a noble_a and_o friendly_a hart_n hart_n our_o bless_a lord_n be_v still_o as_o good_a as_o his_o word_n word_n the_o great_a charity_n &_o humility_n of_o the_o saint_n saint_n how_o devout_a this_o dear_a saint_n be_v be_v they_o be_v very_o noble_a though_o they_o be_v poor_a poor_a the_o devil_n be_v still_o himself_o himself_o this_o be_v such_o a_o kind_n of_o world_n as_o wherein_o thing_n will_v ever_o go_v thus_o thus_o a_o true_a answer_n to_o all_o the_o devil_n objection_n objection_n note_v the_o description_n which_o the_o saint_n make_v here_o of_o her_o religious_a religious_a this_o fast_a of_o the_o order_n be_v not_o so_o strict_a and_o rigorous_a as_o that_o of_o the_o church_n but_o be_v rather_o a_o forbearance_n of_o half_a the_o meal_n than_o a_o fast_a fast_a this_o point_n of_o have_v so_o very_a few_o in_o a_o monastery_n be_v partly_o mean_v for_o they_o who_o be_v to_o live_v in_o any_o place_n on_o alm_n and_o partly_o because_o the_o saint_n have_v see_v some_o disorder_n by_o have_v too_o many_o religious_a in_o other_o house_n and_o yet_o the_o saint_n herself_o come_v afterward_o to_o admit_v of_o twenty_o in_o stead_n of_o twelue_v and_o will_v perhaps_o have_v admit_v more_o if_o she_o have_v find_v reason_n for_o it_o it_o she_o inveigh_v with_o much_o reason_n against_o vain_a compliment_n and_o especial_o among_o religious_a people_n people_n a_o excellent_a &_o most_o useful_a document_n document_n a_o true_a noble_a &_o most_o generous_a hart_n hart_n great_a effect_n of_o a_o vision_n