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although_o there_o be_v defilement_n which_o though_o often_o wash_v off_o will_v as_o often_o come_v again_o to_o blemish_v we_o 13._o and_o though_o the_o deed_n of_o the_o 〈◊〉_d body_n will_v scarce_o all_o of_o they_o perfect_o be_v put_v to_o death_n but_o with_o the_o body_n itself_o yet_o next_o to_o a_o uninterrupted_a state_n of_o health_n frequent_a and_o early_a recovery_n be_v desirable_a and_o though_o the_o shameful_a necessity_n of_o need_v to_o beg_v many_o pardon_n for_o the_o same_o fault_n may_v just_o make_v a_o ingenious_a christian_a cry_n out_o with_o saint_n paul_n o_o wretched_a man_n that_o i_o be_o who_o shall_v deliver_v i_o from_o the_o body_n of_o this_o death_n yet_o the_o same_o sense_n of_o his_o own_o frailty_n that_o put_v this_o exclamation_n into_o his_o mouth_n may_v comfort_v his_o heart_n by_o its_o be_v a_o pledge_n that_o he_o shall_v one_o day_n be_v able_a exult_o to_o say_v with_o the_o same_o apostle_n in_o another_o place_n thanks_o be_v 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confess_v i_o be_v very_o late_o one_o of_o they_o who_o look_v upon_o sleep_n as_o one_o of_o those_o inconvenience_n of_o humane_a nature_n that_o merit_v a_o consolation_n and_o i_o very_o little_o apprehend_v that_o i_o shall_v ever_o complain_v of_o the_o want_n of_o sleep_n as_o of_o a_o grievance_n the_o necessity_n of_o it_o be_v what_o i_o always_o look_v upon_o under_o that_o notion_n but_o i_o now_o perceive_v he_o be_v a_o wise_a man_n who_o say_v that_o god_n make_v every_o thing_n beautiful_a in_o its_o season_n and_o yet_o when_o i_o consider_v the_o affinity_n betwixt_o sleep_n and_o death_n who_o image_n it_o be_v i_o can_v but_o think_v it_o very_o unlikely_a that_o this_o life_n shall_v be_v design_v for_o our_o happiness_n since_o not_o to_o lose_v almost_o half_a of_o it_o be_v a_o infelicity_n another_o thing_n i_o remember_v i_o be_v consider_v be_v this_o that_o though_o want_v of_o sleep_n be_v one_o of_o the_o uneasy_a accident_n that_o attend_v on_o sickness_n yet_o in_o many_o case_n it_o prove_v as_o useful_a as_o it_o can_v be_v unwelcome_a for_o there_o be_v a_o sort_n of_o jolly_a people_n far_o more_o numerous_a than_o i_o can_v wish_v they_o who_o be_v at_o utter_a defiance_n with_o think_v and_o do_v as_o much_o fear_n to_o be_v alone_o as_o they_o shall_v to_o do_v any_o course_n that_o be_v natural_o productive_a of_o so_o unmanly_a a_o fear_n and_o the_o same_o sinful_a employment_n or_o vain_a pastime_n that_o make_v they_o afraid_a of_o be_v alone_o do_v so_o much_o keep_v they_o from_o the_o necessity_n of_o be_v so_o that_o they_o keep_v they_o almost_o from_o the_o very_a possibility_n of_o it_o for_o in_o the_o time_n of_o health_n visit_n business_n card_n and_o i_o know_v not_o how_o many_o other_o avocation_n
a_o horseback_n but_o not_o to_o have_v perform_v a_o long_a journey_n whereas_o he_o that_o by_o thrifty_o husband_v his_o time_n and_o industrious_o improve_n it_o have_v early_o dispatch_v the_o business_n for_o which_o he_o be_v send_v into_o the_o world_n need_v not_o gray-hair_n to_o be_v repute_v to_o have_v live_v long_o enough_o and_o consequent_o long_o than_o those_o that_o wear_v gray-hair_n only_o because_o they_o be_v bear_v many_o year_n before_o he_o in_o a_o word_n to_o one_o of_o these_o sort_n of_o man_n we_o may_v attribute_v a_o long_a time_n but_o to_o the_o other_o a_o long_a life_n for_o even_o the_o heathen_a can_v say_v non_fw-la est_fw-la vivere_fw-la sed_fw-la valere_fw-la vita_fw-la and_o within_o how_o narrow_a a_o compass_n soever_o a_o man_n life_n be_v confine_v if_o he_o have_v live_v so_o long_o as_o before_o he_o come_v to_o the_o end_n of_o life_n he_o have_v reach_v the_o end_n of_o live_v the_o attainment_n of_o that_o measure_n of_o knowledge_n and_o the_o practice_n of_o those_o grace_n and_o virtue_n that_o fit_v a_o man_n to_o glorify_v god_n in_o this_o short_a life_n and_o to_o be_v glorify_v by_o he_o in_o that_o which_o shall_v have_v no_o end_n meditation_n x._o upon_o a_o thief_n in_o a_o candle_n the_o silence_n of_o the_o night_n and_o my_o be_v unable_a to_o sleep_n dispose_v i_o to_o have_v my_o attention_n very_o easy_o excite_v i_o chance_v to_o take_v notice_n that_o the_o dim_a light_n of_o the_o candle_n which_o the_o curtain_n be_v not_o draw_v so_o close_o as_o to_o exclude_v every_o where_o out_o of_o the_o bed_n be_v on_o a_o sudden_a considerable_o increase_v and_o continue_v so_o long_o in_o that_o condition_n that_o for_o fear_n of_o some_o mischance_n i_o put_v my_o head_n out_o of_o the_o bed_n to_o see_v whence_o it_o be_v that_o this_o new_a and_o unexpected_a increase_n of_o light_n proceed_v but_o i_o quick_o find_v that_o it_o be_v from_o a_o thief_n as_o they_o call_v it_o in_o the_o candle_n which_o by_o its_o irregular_a way_n of_o make_v the_o flame_n blaze_n have_v melt_v down_o a_o good_a part_n of_o the_o tallow_n and_o will_v have_v spoil_v the_o rest_n if_o i_o have_v not_o call_v to_o one_o of_o those_o that_o watch_v with_o i_o to_o rescue_v the_o remain_v by_o the_o removal_n of_o the_o thief_n but_o i_o have_v scarce_o do_v this_o when_o i_o confess_v to_o you_o sophronia_n i_o find_v myself_o invite_v to_o make_v some_o reflection_n upon_o what_o i_o have_v do_v and_o to_o read_v myself_o a_o new_a lesson_n by_o the_o beam_n of_o this_o new_a light_n for_o though_o this_o thief_n make_v the_o candle_n shine_v more_o strong_o and_o diffuse_v a_o much_o great_a light_n than_o it_o do_v before_o yet_o because_o it_o make_v a_o great_a and_o irregular_a waste_n of_o the_o candle_n i_o order_v it_o to_o be_v take_v away_o and_o on_o this_o occasion_n methought_n i_o may_v just_o make_v use_n of_o that_o say_n of_o pharaoh_n forgetful_a butler_n i_o do_v remember_v my_o fault_n this_o day_n gen._n 41._o 9_o for_o though_o i_o find_v no_o great_a difficulty_n in_o abstain_v from_o other_o kind_n of_o intemperance_n yet_o to_o that_o of_o study_v my_o friend_n and_o especial_o my_o physician_n have_v often_o accuse_v i_o of_o be_v too_o indulgent_a nor_o can_v i_o altogether_o deny_v but_o that_o in_o mental_a exercise_n there_o can_v be_v exorbitancy_n and_o excess_n i_o may_v have_v sometime_o be_v guilty_a of_o they_o and_o that_o the_o thing_n for_o which_o i_o think_v life_n valuable_a be_v the_o satisfaction_n that_o accrue_v from_o the_o improvement_n of_o knowledge_n and_o the_o exercise_n of_o piety_n i_o think_v it_o allowable_a if_o not_o commendable_a to_o consume_v or_o hazard_v it_o for_o the_o attainment_n of_o those_o end_n and_o esteem_v sickness_n more_o formidable_a for_o its_o unfit_v i_o to_o learn_v and_o to_o teach_v than_o for_o its_o be_v attend_v with_o pain_n and_o danger_n and_o look_v upon_o what_o it_o make_v i_o forbear_v as_o far_o more_o troublesome_a than_o what_o ever_o else_o it_o make_v i_o endure_v but_o i_o find_v my_o body_n be_v a_o jade_n and_o tire_n under_o my_o mind_n and_o a_o few_o hour_n fix_v contemplation_n do_v sensible_o so_o spend_v my_o spirit_n as_o to_o make_v i_o feel_v myself_o more_o weary_a that_o the_o ride_v post_n for_o twice_o as_o many_o hour_n have_v ever_o do_v wherefore_o since_o though_o the_o proper_a use_n of_o a_o candle_n be_v to_o consume_v itself_o that_o it_o may_v give_v other_o light_n i_o yet_o think_v fit_a to_o have_v the_o thief_n take_v away_o because_o though_o it_o make_v the_o candle_n give_v more_o light_n it_o will_v have_v waste_v it_o too_o fast_o and_o consequent_o make_v it_o expire_v too_o soon_o i_o see_v not_o how_o i_o can_v resist_v their_o persuasion_n that_o will_v have_v i_o husband_n better_o the_o little_a stock_n of_o strength_n nature_n have_v give_v i_o and_o the_o rather_o by_o a_o moderate_a expense_n of_o it_o endeavour_v to_o make_v it_o shine_v long_o though_o but_o dim_o then_o consume_v it_o to_o fast_o though_o for_o a_o while_n to_o keep_v up_o a_o blaze_n i_o will_v therefore_o endeavour_v to_o learn_v of_o this_o sickness_n and_o of_o this_o accident_n what_o the_o doctor_n hitherto_o can_v never_o teach_v i_o and_o enjoin_v myself_o a_o abstinence_n which_o to_o i_o be_v more_o uneasy_a than_o if_o wine_n or_o woman_n or_o other_o sensual_a pleasure_n be_v to_o be_v the_o object_n of_o it_o but_o if_o in_o so_o difficult_a a_o exercise_n of_o self-denial_n i_o do_v not_o always_o perform_v what_o i_o be_o now_o persuade_v to_o it_o be_v like_a i_o shall_v easy_o forgive_v myself_o for_o but_o a_o little_a hasten_v the_o end_n of_o my_o life_n to_o attain_v the_o end_n of_o it_o meditation_n xi_o upon_o the_o be_v in_o danger_n of_o death_n i_o know_v that_o physician_n be_v wont_n after_o their_o master_n hypocrates_n to_o tell_v we_o that_o fever_n which_o intermit_v be_v devoid_a of_o danger_n but_o though_o a_o ague_n whilst_o it_o continue_v such_o can_v not_o be_v a_o mortal_a disease_n yet_o why_o may_v it_o not_o degenerate_a into_o such_o a_o one_o and_o for_o my_o part_n who_o take_v the_o prognostic_n of_o physician_n to_o be_v but_o guess_v not_o prophecy_n and_o know_v how_o backward_o they_o be_v to_o bid_v we_o fear_v till_o our_o condition_n leave_v they_o little_a hope_n of_o we_o i_o can_v but_o think_v that_o patient_n very_o ill_o advise_v who_o think_v it_o not_o time_n to_o entertain_v thought_n of_o death_n as_o long_o as_o his_o doctor_n allow_v he_o any_o hope_n of_o life_n for_o in_o case_n they_o shall_v both_o be_v deceive_v it_o will_v be_v much_o easy_a for_o the_o mistake_a physician_n to_o save_v his_o credit_n than_o for_o the_o unprepared_a sinner_n to_o save_v his_o soul_n wherefore_o sophronia_n find_v my_o disease_n attend_v with_o unusual_a threaten_a symptom_n not_o know_v where_o they_o will_v end_v i_o last_o night_n think_v it_o fit_a to_o suppose_v they_o may_v end_v in_o death_n and_o two_o thing_n especial_o make_v i_o the_o more_o ready_a for_o such_o a_o entertainment_n of_o my_o thought_n one_o that_o we_o can_v scarce_o be_v too_o careful_a and_o diligent_a in_o fit_v ourselves_o for_o the_o act_n of_o a_o part_n well_o that_o we_o can_v never_o act_n but_o once_o for_o where_o the_o scripture_n tell_v we_o it_o be_v appoint_v for_o all_o man_n once_o to_o dye_n it_o be_v immediate_o subjoin_v that_o after_o that_o come_v judgement_n and_o if_o we_o dye_v ill_o once_o we_o shall_v never_o be_v allow_v to_o die_v again_o to_o see_v if_o we_o will_v die_v better_o the_o second_o time_n than_o we_o do_v the_o first_o but_o as_o the_o wise_a man_n allegorical_o speak_v where_o the_o tree_n fall_v there_o shall_v it_o lie_v so_o that_o the_o fault_n commit_v in_o this_o last_o and_o important_a of_o humane_a action_n be_v irreparable_a i_o think_v the_o only_a safe_a way_n be_v to_o imitate_v he_o who_o have_v say_v if_o a_o man_n dye_v shall_v he_o live_v again_o present_o annex_v by_o way_n of_o inference_n and_o resolution_n all_o the_o day_n of_o my_o appoint_a time_n will_v i_o wait_v till_o my_o change_n come_v the_o other_o consideration_n that_o recommend_v to_o i_o the_o thought_n of_o the_o grave_a be_v this_o that_o we_o may_v be_v often_o solicitous_a to_o provide_v against_o many_o evil_n and_o danger_n that_o possible_o may_v never_o reach_v we_o and_o many_o endure_v from_o the_o anxious_a fear_n of_o contingent_a mischief_n that_o never_o will_v befall_v they_o more_o torment_n than_o the_o apprehend_a mischief_n themselves_o though_o real_o suffer_v will_v inflict_v but_o death_n will_v soon_o