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day_n aforesaid_a justice_n thomas_n 5,754 5 10.3733 5 false
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ID Title Author Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication) STC Words Pages
A66812 Witty apophthegms delivered at several times, and upon several occasions by King James, King Charls, the Marquess of Worcester, Francis Lord Bacon, and Sir Thomas Moor ; collected and revised. Bayly, Thomas, d. 1657?; James I, King of England, 1566-1625. Selections. 1669.; Charles I, King of England, 1600-1649. Selections. 1669.; Worcester, Henry Somerset, Marquis of, 1577-1646. Selections. 1669.; Bacon, Francis, 1561-1626. Selections. 1669.; More, Thomas, Sir, Saint, 1478-1535. Selections. 1669. 1669 (1669) Wing W3237; ESTC R12699 69,627 178

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latter_a end_n of_o their_o day_n he_o say_v thus_o a_o lewd_a fellow_n that_o have_v spend_v all_o his_o life_n in_o wickedness_n be_v wont_a to_o brag_v that_o he_o can_v be_v save_v if_o he_o speak_v but_o three_o word_n at_o the_o hour_n of_o his_o death_n ride_v over_o a_o bridge_n that_o be_v break_v his_o horse_n stumble_v &_o not_o be_v able_a to_o save_v himself_o from_o fall_v into_o the_o water_n when_o he_o see_v himself_o past_o recovery_n cast_v away_o the_o bridle_n he_o say_v the_o devil_n take_v all_o and_o so_o with_o his_o three_o word_n he_o perish_v in_o the_o river_n 8._o even_o as_o he_o that_o pass_v over_o a_o narrow_a bridge_n by_o reason_n of_o his_o fear_n often_o fall_v especial_o if_o other_o say_v to_o he_o you_o fall_v which_o otherwise_o he_o will_v safe_o pass_v over_o even_o so_o he_o that_o be_v fearful_a by_o nature_n and_o full_a of_o pusillanimity_n often_o fall_v into_o desperation_n the_o devil_n cry_v unto_o hi●…_n thou_o be_v damn_v which_o he_o will_v never_o hearken_v to_o nor_o be_v in_o any_o danger_n of_o if_o he_o shall_v take_v unto_o he_o a_o good_a heart_n and_o by_o wholesome_a council_n nothing_o fear_v the_o devil_n outcry_n 9_o the_o prosperity_n of_o this_o world_n be_v like_o the_o short_a winter_n day_n and_o we_o be_v list_v up_o in_o it_o as_o a_o arrow_n shoot_v upon_o high_a where_o a_o short_a breath_n do●…h_v delight_v we_o but_o from_o thence_o we_o fall_v sudden_o to_o the_o earth_n and_o there_o we_o stick_v fast_o either_o bemire_v with_o the_o dirt_n of_o insamy_n or_o starve_v with_o cold_a be_v pluck_v on_o it_o of_o our_o feather_n 10._o it_o be_v a_o hard_a thing_n to_o touch_v pitch_n and_o not_o be_v desile_v therewith_o a_o dry_a stick_n to_o be_v put_v into_o the_o fire_n and_o not_o to_o be_v burn_v to_o nourish_v a_o snake_n in_o our_o bosom_n and_o not_o to_o be_v sting_v with_o it_o so_o a_o m●…st_o hard_a thing_n it_o be_v to_o be_v rich_a and_o honour_a in_o this_o world_n and_o not_o be_v strike_v with_o the_o dart_n of_o pride_n and_o vai●…-glory_n 11._o let_v there_o be_v two_o beggar_n who_o a_o long_a time_n beg_v together_o one_o of_o who_o some_o rich_a man_n have_v entertain_v in_o his_o house_n put_v he_o in_o silk_n give_v he_o money_n in_o his_o purse_n but_o with_o this_o cond●…tion_n as_o he_o tell_v he_o within_o a_o short_a space_n he_o will_v thrust_v he_o out_o of_o his_o door_n and_o take_v all_o that_o away_o from_o he_o again_o if_o he_o in_o the_o mean_a while_n be_v thus_o gallant_a shall_v chance_v to_o meet_v with_o his_o fellow_n beggar_n will_v he_o be_v so_o foolish_a as_o for_o all_o this_o not_o to_o acknowledge_v he_o for_o his_o companion_n or_o will_v he_o for_o those_o few_o day_n happiness_n hold_v himself_o better_a than_o he_o apply_v this_o to_o every_o man_n case_n who_o come_v naked_a into_o this_o world_n and_o be_v to_o return_v naked_a again_o 12._o if_o he_o be_v call_v stout_a that_o have_v sortitude_n he_o hot_a who_o have_v heat_n wise_a that_o have_v wisdom_n yet_o he_o who_o have_v riches_n can_v be_v say_v present_o to_o be_v good_a therefore_o riches_n can_v be_v number_v among_o good_a thing_n twenty_o yea_o a_o hundred_o bare_a head_n stand_v by_o a_o noble_a man_n do_v not_o defend_v his_o head_n from_o cold_a so_o much_o as_o his_o own_o hat_n do_v alone_o which_o yet_o he_o be_v enforce_v to_o put_v off_o in_o the_o presence_n of_o his_o prince_n 13._o he_o that_o know_v certain_o he_o be_v to_o be_v banish_v into_o a_o strange_a country_n never_o to_o return_v again_o 〈◊〉_d his_o own_o and_o will_v not_o endure_v that_o his_o good_n be_v transport_v thither_o be_v loath_a to_o want_v they_o for_o that_o little_a while_n rather_o than_o ever_o to_o enjoy_v they_o after_o may_v well_o be_v think_v a_o mad_a man_n so_o be_v they_o out_o of_o their_o wit_n who_o entice_v with_o a_o vain_a affection_n to_o keep_v their_o good_n always_o about_o they_o and_o neglective_a to_o give_v alm_n for_o fear_n of_o want_v can_v endure_v to_o have_v their_o good_n send_v before_o they_o to_o heaven_n when_o as_o they_o know_v most_o assure_o that_o they_o shall_v enjoy_v they_o always_o there_o with_o all_o plenty_n and_o with_o a_o double_a reward_n 14._o to_o ease_v his_o thought_n when_o he_o be_v in_o prison_n he_o imagine_v that_o all_o the_o world_n be_v but_o a_o prison_n out_o of_o which_o every_o day_n some_o one_o or_o other_o be_v call_v to_o execution_n 15._o when_o he_o hear_v any_o at_o his_o table_n speak_v detraction_n he_o will_v interrupt_v they_o thus_o let_v any_o man_n think_v as_o he_o please_v i_o like_v this_o room_n very_o well_o for_o it_o be_v very_o well_o contrive_v and_o fair_o build_v 16._o of_o a_o ungrateful_a person_n he_o will_v say_v that_o they_o write_v good_a turn_v d●…ne_v unto_o they_o in_o the_o dust_n but_o even_o the_o least_o injury_n in_o marble_n 17._o he_o compare_v reason_n to_o a_o handmaid_n which_o if_o she_o be_v well_o teach_v will_v obey_v and_o faith_n to_o the_o mistress_n which_o be_v to_o keep_v she_o in_o awe_n 18._o he_o say_v that_o he_o be_v a_o mad_a man_n that_o will_v drink_v poison_n to_o take_v a_o preservative_n after_o it_o but_o he_o be_v a_o wiseman_n that_o spill_v the_o poison_n leave_v the_o antidote_n for_o he_o that_o have_v need_n thereof_o 19_o when_o sir_n thomas_n moor_n live_v in_o the_o city_n of_o london_n be_v one_o of_o the_o justice_n of_o peace_n he_o use_v to_o go_v to_o the_o session_n at_o new_a gate_n where_o it_o fall_v out_o that_o one_o of_o the_o ancient_a justice_n of_o the_o bench_n be_v wont_a to_o chide_v the_o poor_a man_n who_o purse_n have_v be_v cut_v for_o not_o be_v more_o careful_a tell_v they_o their_o negligence_n be_v the_o cause_n that_o so_o many_o cutpurse_n be_v bring_v thither_o which_o when_o sir_n thomas_n moor_n observe_v he_o so_o often_o to_o repeat_v at_o one_o time_n especial_o the_o night_n after_o he_o send_v for_o one_o of_o the_o chief_a cutpurse_n that_o be_v in_o prison_n and_o promise_v to_o save_v he_o harmless_a and_o stand_v his_o friend_n too_o if_o he_o will_v cut_v the_o aforesaid_a justice_n purse_n the_o next_o day_n as_o he_o sit_v on_o the_o bench_n and_o then_o present_o make_v a_o sign_n of_o it_o to_o he_o the_o fellow_n very_o glad_o promise_v he_o to_o do_v it_o the_o next_o day_n therefore_o when_o they_o sit_v again_o that_o thief_n be_v call_v among_o the_o first_o who_o be_v accuse_v of_o his_o fact_n say_v he_o do_v not_o doubt_v but_o that_o he_o can_v sufficient_o excuse_v himself_o if_o he_o be_v permit_v to_o speak_v to_o some_o of_o the_o bench_n in_o private_a he_o be_v therefore_o bid_v to_o choose_v one_o who_o he_o will_v and_o present_o he_o choose_v that_o grave_a old_a man_n who_o then_o have_v his_o pouch_n at_o his_o girdle_n as_o they_o wear_v they_o in_o those_o day_n and_o whilst_o he_o whisper_v he_o in_o the_o ear_n he_o cunning_o cut_v his_o purse_n and_o then_o solemn_o take_v his_o leave_n returns_z to_o his_o place_n sir_n thomas_n know_v by_o a_o private_a sign_n that_o the_o business_n be_v dispatch_v present_o take_v occasion_n to_o move_v the_o bench_n to_o distribute_v some_o alm_n to_o a_o poor_a needy_a fellow_n that_o be_v there_o and_o for_o good_a example_n begin_v himself_o to_o do_v it_o when_o the_o old_a man_n come_v to_o open_v his_o purse_n and_o see_v it_o cut_v away_o and_o much_o wonder_v say_v he_o be_v confident_a he_o bring_v it_o with_o he_o when_o he_o come_v thither_o that_o morning_n sir_n thomas_n reply_v present_o what_o will_v you_o charge_v any_o of_o we_o with_o felony_n but_o his_o choler_n rise_v and_o he_o be_v ashamed_a of_o the_o thing_n sir_n thomas_n call_v the_o cutpurse_n and_o bid_v he_o give_v he_o his_o purse_n again_o and_o withal_o advise_v the_o good_a old_a justice_n hereafter_o not_o to_o be_v so_o bitter_a a_o censurer_n of_o innocent_a man_n negligence_n when_o as_o himself_o can_v not_o secure_v his_o purse_n in_o that_o open_a assembly_n 20._o when_o he_o be_v lord_n chancellor_n one_o of_o the_o house_n of_o the_o manor_n who_o the_o king_n have_v late_o prefer_v to_o a_o great_a honour_n who_o before_o that_o have_v be_v a_o great_a friend_n of_o sir_n thomas_n moores_n but_o perceive_v now_o that_o the_o world_n begin_v somewhat_o to_o frown_v upon_o he_o because_o he_o be_v not_o so_o forward_o as_o other_o man_n to_o persuade_v the_o king_n to_o the_o divorce_n and_o be_v desirous_a to_o pick_v so●…e_a quarrel_n against_o he_o my_o lord_n say_v honours_n mut●…nt_a moor_n sir_n thomas_z
ready_o reply_v it_o as_o so_o indeed_o my_o lord_n but_o mores_n signify_v in_o english_a manner_n not_o more_o which_o answer_n put_v my_o gentleman_n to_o a_o nihil_fw-la di●…_n 21._o sir_n thomas_n moor_n have_v le●…t_o a_o gentleman_n money_n in_o some_o time_n afterward_o demand_v it_o back_o of_o the_o gentleman_n the_o gentleman_n bid_v he_o remember_v he_o must_v die_v and_o god_n know_v how_o soon_o and_o that_o then_o he_o shall_v have_v little_a use_n of_o money_n add_v the_o se●…ence_n in_o latin_a the_o better_a to_o please_v sr._n ●…h_o ma●…_n memento_n morieris_fw-la to_o which_o sir_n 〈◊〉_d present_o answer_v what_o say_v you_o sir_n methinks_v you_o put_v yourself_o in_o mind_n of_o your_o duty_n herein_o say_v memento_n moriaeris_n remember_v moor_n money_n 21._o it_o happen_v on_o a_o time●…_n hat_n a_o beggar_n little_a dog_n which_o she_o have_v lose_v be_v send_v to_o the_o lady_n moor_n for_o a_o present_a and_o she_o have_v keep_v it_o about_o a_o week_n very_o careful_o but_o at_o last_o the_o beggar_n have_v notice_n where_o her_o dog_n be_v present_o come_v and_o complain_v to_o sir_n thomas_n as_o he_o be_v sit_v in_o his_o hall_n that_o his_o lady_n keep_v her_o dog_n from_o she_o present_o my_o lady_n be_v send_v for_o and_o the_o dog_n bring_v with_o she_o which_o sir_n thomas_n take_v in_o his_o arm_n he_o cause_v his_o wife_n to_o stand_v at_o the_o upper_a end_n of_o the_o hall_n and_o the_o beggar_n at_o the_o low_a end_n and_o then_o say_v that_o he_o sit_v there_o to_o do_v every_o one_o justice_n he_o badeach_v of_o they_o call_v the_o dog_n which_o when_o they_o do_v the_o dog_n run_v present_o to_o the_o beggar_n forsake_v his_o lady_n when_o he_o see_v this_o he_o bid_v his_o wife_n be_v content_v for_o it_o be_v none_o of_o she_o yet_o she_o repine_v at_o his_o sentence_n agree_v with_o the_o beggar_n and_o give_v she_o a_o piece_n of_o gold_n so_o all_o party_n be_v satisfy_v every_o one_o smile_v at_o this_o strange_a discovery_n of_o truth_n 23._o another_o time_n a_o certain_a friend_n of_o his_o take_n great_a pain_n about_o a_o book_n which_o he_o intend_v to_o publish_v be_v well_o conce●…ted_v of_o his_o own_o wit_n which_o no_o body_n else_o think_v worth_a of_o commendation_n and_o because_o he_o will_v sir_n thomas_n moor_n shall_v observe_v it_o ever_o it_o be_v print_v he_o bring_v it_o to_o he_o who_o peruse_v it_o and_o find_v nothing_o therein_o worthy_a the_o press_n say_v with_o a_o grave_a countenance_n if_o it_o be_v in_o verse_n it_o be_v more_o worth_a upon_o which_o word_n he_o go_v immediate_o and_o turn_v it_o into_o verse_n and_o then_o bring_v it_o again_o to_o sir_n thomas_n who_o look_v thereon_o say_v sober_o yea_o marry_v now_o it_o be_v somewhat_o for_o now_o it_o be_v rithm_n before_o it_o be_v neither_o rithm_n nor_o reason_n 24._o and_o what_o ever_o jest_v he_o bring_v forth_o he_o never_o laugh_v at_o any_o himself_n but_o speak_v they_o so_o serious_o that_o few_o can_v discern_v by_o his_o look_n whether_o he_o be_v in_o earnest_n or_o in_o jest_n as_o once_o talk_v with_o another_o in_o dispute_n of_o his_o dialogue_n by_o some_o occasion_n they_o happen_v to_o speak_v of_o a_o dog_n turd_n at_o that_o very_a instant_a one_o of_o his_o man_n come_v to_o tell_v he_o that_o dinner_n be_v ready_a to_o who_o he_o say_v look_v that_o there_o be_v better_a mea●…_n provide_v for_o we_o than_o that_o who_o present_o go_v and_o tell_v his_o lady_n that_o his_o lord_n will_v have_v better_a meat_n provide_v for_o his_o dinner_n which_o cause_v a_o great_a disturbance_n in_o the_o house_n till_o at_o last_o the_o mistake_n be_v know_v the_o sea_n of_o their_o disturbance_n be_v calm_v in_o a_o fit_a of_o laugh_v 25._o sir_n thomas_n moor_n have_v only_a daughter_n at_o the_o first_o and_o his_o wife_n do_v ever_o pray_v for_o a_o boy_n at_o last_o she_o have_v a_o boy_n which_o after_o at_o man_n year_n prove_v simple_a sir_n thomas_n say_v to_o his_o wife_n thou_o pray_v so_o long_o for_o a_o boy_n that_o he_o will_v be_v a_o boy_n as_o long_o as_o he_o live_v 26._o sir_n thomas_n moor_n the_o day_n he_o be_v behead_v have_v a_o barber_n send_v to_o he_o because_o his_o hair_n be_v long_o which_o be_v think_v will_v make_v he_o more_o commiserable_a with_o the_o people_n the_o barber_n come_v to_o he_o and_o ask_v he_o whether_o he_o will_v be_v please_v to_o be_v trim_v in_o good_a faith_n honest_a fellow_n say_v sir_n thomas_n the_o king_n and_o i_o have_v a_o suit_n for_o my_o head_n and_o till_o the_o title_n be_v clear_v i_o will_v do_v no_o c●…st_n upon_o it_o 27._o sir_n thomas_n moor_n have_v send_v he_o by_o a_o suitor_n in_o the_o chancery_n two_o silver_n flagon_n when_o they_o be_v present_v by_o the_o gentleman_n servant_n he_o say_v to_o one_o of_o his_o man_n have_v he_o to_o the_o cellar_n and_o let_v he_o have_v of_o my_o best_a wine_n and_o turn_v to_o the_o servant_n say_v tell_v thy_o m●…ster_n friend_n if_o he_o like_v it_o let_v he_o not_o spare_v it_o 28._o when_o sir_n thomas_n moor_n be_v lord_n chance●…lour_n he_o do_v use_v at_o mass_n to_o sit_v in_o the_o chancel_n and_o his_o lady_n in_o a_o pew_n and_o because_o the_o pew_n stand_v out_o of_o sight_n his_o gentleman_z usher_z ever_o afte●…_n service_n come_v to_o the_o lady_n pew_o and_o say_v madam_n my_o lord_n be_v go_v so_o when_o the_o chancellor_n place_n be_v take_v from_o he_o the_o next_o time_n they_o go_v to_o church_n sir_n thomas_n himself_o come_v to_o his_o lady_n pew_n and_o say_v madam_n my_o lord_n be_v go_v 29._o in_o sir_n thomas_n moor_n imprisonment_n in_o the_o tower_n there_o come_v one_o from_o the_o court_n for_o to_o persuade_v sir_n thomas_n to_o change_v his_o mind_n before_o he_o die_v of_o those_o thing_n which_o he_o stand_v condemn_v in_o by_o the_o law_n and_o sir_n thomas_n be_v weary_v with_o his_o importanity_n say_v i_o have_v change_v my_o mind_n the_o c●…tier_n say_v in_o what_o sir_n thomas_n reply_v in_o this_o that_o whereas_o he_o have_v intend_v to_o be_v s●…aven_n that_o he_o may_v appear_v to_o the_o people_n as_o before_o he_o be_v wo●…_n now_o he_o be_v full_o resolve_v that_o his_o beard_n shall_v take_v such_o part_n as_o his_o head_n do_v 30._o sir_n thomas_n pope_n visit_v sir_n thomas_n moor_n in_o his_o imprisonment_n be_v very_o sad_a and_o can_v not_o refrain_v from_o weep_v which_o sir_n thomas_n moor_n see_v to_o put_v he_o out_o of_o his_o melancholy_n take_v his_o own_o urinal_n in_o his_o hand_n and_o cast_v his_o water_n say_v merry_o i_o see_v no_o danger_n but_o that_o this_o man_n mean_v himself_o may_v live_v long_o if_o it_o have_v please_v the_o king_n 31._o sir_n thomas_n moor_n who_o be_v a_o man_n in_o all_o his_o life_n time_n that_o have_v a_o excellent_a vein_n in_o jest_v a_o little_a before_o and_o at_o his_o death_n deliver_v himself_o in_o this_o manner_n come_v on_o the_o scaffold_n which_o seem_v to_o he_o so_o weak_a that_o it_o be_v ready_a to_o fall_v he_o say_v merry_o to_o the_o lieutenant_n i_o pray_v you_o mr._n lieutenant_n see_v i_o safe_a up_o &_o for_o my_o come_n down_o let_v i_o shift_v for_o myself_o and_o to_o the_o execaioner_n he_o say_v pluck_v up_o thy_o spirit_n man_n and_o be_v not_o afraid_a to_o do_v thy_o office_n my_o neck_n be_v very_o short_a take_v heed_n therefore_o thou_o strike_v not_o away_o for_o save_v thy_o honesty_n and_o at_o the_o very_a instant_n of_o his_o death_n have_v a_o pretty_a long_a beard_n after_o his_o head_n be_v upon_o the_o block_n lift_v it_o up_o again_o and_o gentle_o draw_v his_o beard_n aside_o and_o say_v that_o that_o have_v never_o commit_v any_o treason_n nor_o in_o the_o least_o offend_v the_o king_n and_o therefore_o shall_v not_o be_v cut_v off_o and_o thus_o pass_v sir_n thomas_n moor_n out_o of_o this_o world_n on_o the_o very_a same_o day_n on_o which_o himself_o have_v most_o desire_v be_v saint_n thomas_n day_n in_o the_o year_n of_o our_o lord_n 1537._o finis_fw-la