me for such a great man as I am to instruct my Family 4. Riches and Honour and worldly Greatness should be so far from taking off any man from any good work that they should cause him to be more abundant in every good work 1 Tim. 6.17 18. Charge them that are rich in this world that they do good that they be rich in good works Jehoshaphat who was a good as well as a great man was so far from neglecting any of the ways of the Lord because of his Greatness that his heart was more elevated and encouraged to lay out himself for God by the Honour and Greatness which God had conferred upon him 2 Chron. 17.5 6. The Lord stablished the Kingdom in his hand and all Judah brought to Jehoshaphat Presents and he had Riches and Honour in abundance and his heart was lift up or as 't is in the Margin was encouraged in the ways of the Lord. SECT 11. The Plea of such as say they have no spare time to instruct their Families because they are poor or have much business or are often abroad answered Object 11 THere are many will plead They have no spare time to instruct their Families some because they are poor others because they are often from home a third sort because they are full of business who are ready to say On the week days we must attend our worldly occasions and on Lords days we must attend publick Ordinances and take some time for our private Communion with God so that we can find no time to instruct our Families Answ 1. Do you not find time to eat and drink with your Children If you can find time notwithstanding all your business to eat and drink with your Families if you had as great a delight in the word of God as Job had you would also find time to instruct them out of the word of God for he esteemed Gods word more than his food yea more than his necessary food Job 23.12 I have esteemed the words of his mouth more than my necessary food Are not your Childrens Souls infinitely better than their Bodies And will you then spend all your time in providing for their Bodies and spare no time to instruct their Souls Your Childrens Souls are in as great danger to perish without Instruction as their Bodies without Food and Rayment their Bodies will die if they have no Food prepared for them so will their Souls if they be without Instruction Prov. 5.23 He shall die without instruction and in the greatness of his folly he shall go astray Hos 4.6 My People are destroyed for want of Knowledge 2. Suppose you are poor your Poverty should be so far from keeping you from teaching Gods Word unto your Children that you should be the more diligent to study Gods word your selves and to teach the same unto your Children And that for several Reasons As First Gods Word will help you and your Children to bear your Poverty with Patience and Contentment The Apostle Paul exerercised much patience in his Afflictions Necessities and Distresses and the help which he had to bear his Necessities with patience was from the Word of God 2 Cor. 6.4 7. Increasing in the knowledge of God will strengthen a man with all might to suffer all sorts of afflictions with all Patience Long-suffering and Joyfulness Col. 1.10 11. Secondly If you be poor and can leave your Children nothing you have the more need to leave them instructed in the Word of God and if you leave them well instructed in the Word you leave them a good portion better then if you left them thousands of pounds in Silver or Gold Psal 119.72 The law of thy mouth is better unto me than thousands of Gold and Silver Thirdly By laying up Gods word in your hearts and teaching it your Children and practising it in your Lives and Conversations you may come to be deliver'd from your Poverty and be blessed with Riches Prov. 10.22 The blessing of the Lord it maketh rich and who are more likely to obtain this Blessing then they that treasure up Gods word in their hearts and teach it to their Children Job 22.22 24. Receive I pray thee the Law from his mouth and lay up his words in thine heart then shalt thou lay up Gold as dust and the Gold of Ophir as the stones of the brook Prov. 24.4 By knowledge shall the Chambers be filled with all precious and pleasant Riches Fourthly If the Lord should see it best for you and your Children to be kept in a poor and low condition and should deny you the Riches of this world yet by conversing much with the word of God and instructing your Children in the knowledge of the Scriptures both you and your Children may come to be rich in faith and by being rich in faith both you and they shall become great Heirs Heirs of a Kingdom Heirs not of an earthly but which is far better of an heavenly Kingdom Jam. 2.5 Hath not God chosen the poor of this world rich in faith Heirs of the Kingdom which he hath promised to them that love him 3. Multiplicity of Business is not a sufficient Plea for the neglect of this duty of Family-Instruction For First Next to the working out of our own salvation we can have no Business of greater importance than the training up our Families in the knowledge and fear of God Secondly A good man must order all his affairs with discretion so as one Business may not hinder another especially that which is of lesser moment must not hinder that which is of greater concerment Thirdly When a man hath an heart for this work he will easily find time to do it Want of time may be pretended but want of an heart to the work is the real cause why it is neglected Fourthly No men can have more or greater Business than Kings who have the Affairs of an whole Kingdom lying upon their hands yet David who was a King found time to teach his Children Prov. 4.3 4. yet he had much other Business besides governing the Twelve Tribes of Israel who were a very numerous People as preparing Materials to build the Temple composing of Psalms fighting of Battels there being both Civil Wars and War with forraign Enemies in his days c. Fifthly They that have most Business if they take a view of their time shall find that much of their time is lost and mis-spent either in idleness or vain unprofitable Discourse or unnecessary thoughts and cares about the affairs of this life or in some other kind Do but spend so much time in Family-Instruction as you have been used to spend unprofitably and you shall find time enough for this work 4. Suppose you be full of Employment that you can find no spare time on the week day to instruct your Families yet on every Lords day wherein you are to lay aside all your worldly Business you may find time and leasure enough to instruct your
loving to them Love will draw love from the worst of men Luk. 6.32 Sinners also love those that love them Shew your love to them by speaking kindly to them and by seeking their welfare Hereby Mordecai got the love of the Jews Esth 10.3 Mordecai the Jew was accepted of the multitude of his Brethren seeking the wealth of his people and speaking peace to all his seed Secondly Be kind to them as you see occasion give them some gifts to encourage them to learn those things that are for their good this will win much upon their affections Prov. 19.6 Every man is a friend to him that giveth Gifts Thirdly Give ear to their just Complaints and be willing to redress their grievances Job was ready to hear the cause and complaint of the meanest Servant in his family even when and wherein he himself was concerned Job 31.13 14. If I did despise the cause of my man Servant or of my maid Servant when they contended with me what then shall I do when God riseth up And when he visiteth what shall I answer him And who was more loved and respected than Job Job 29.8 9 10 11. Absolom by his courteous carriage and kind speeches and by expressing his readiness to redress the grievances of the people stole the hearts of the men of Israel 2 Sam 15.2 3 4 5 6. When the people of Israel came to Rehoboam with a desire to redress their grievances his wise men counselled him to answer their desires for thereby he should engage their affections to him for ever 2 Chron. 10.7 If thou be kind to this people and please them and speak good words unto them they will be thy Servants for ever Fourthly Answer their Requests when they defire those things that are for their good and which may conveniently be granted them As Gods answering our Requests makes us love God Psal 116.1 I love the Lord because he hath heard the voice of my Supplications So our answering those Requests which our Children or Servants make to us will engage them to love us Fifthly Cover their failings and infirmities Prov. 17.9 He that covereth a transgression seeketh love or as it is in the Margent procureth love By covering a cransgression is not meant that we should forbear reproving them for Reproof prudently administred will not hinder but increase love Prov. 9.8 Rebuke a wise man and he will love thee But by covering a transgrâ—â—son is meant 1. That we should not twit and upbraid them with their faults and be often repeating them as the manner of some is especially when they are in a passion for this is a great hindrance of love and causeth discord between inward Friends as appears by the following words But he that repeateth a matter separateth very friends 2. That we should not divulge or blaze abroad their infirmities but endeavour to conceal them SECT 11. How to ingraft the Word of God in the hearts of our Children and Servants How we may bring them in love with the Word Direct 11 IF you would save the Souls of your Children and Servants by those Instructions which you give them out of the word of God endeavour to ingraft those Truths which you teach them in their hearts for if the Word of God be ingrafted in their hearts it will be a powerful means of saving their Souls Jam. 1.21 Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness and receive with meekness the engrafted word which is able to save your Souls If you say What shall we do that we may get the word of God ingrafted in their hearts I answer First Acquaint them with Gods Covenant wherein he hath promised to engrave or write his word in their hearts Jer. 31.33 I will put my Law in their inward parts and write it in their hearts And stir them up to plead this Covenant until they find that God according to his promise hath engraven his Law upon their hearts Secondly Cause them to understand those Scriptures which you teach them and to that end when there is any difficulty therein explain them and labour to beget in them a clear and right understanding of the word of God When the understanding is enlightned with the knowledge of Divine Truths there is way made for their entrance into and their abode in the heart Prov. 14.33 Wisdom resteth in the heart of him that hath understanding By wisdom we may understand the grace of God Job 28.28 The fear of the Lord that is wisdom Now the grace of God doth not only enter into but resteth and maketh its abode in the heart of him that hath understanding If your Instructions be never so good though they be drawn out of the word of God yet if they be not understood they will not abide in their hearts whom you instruct but will quickly vanish out of their minds Matth. 13.19 When any one heareth the word of the Kingdom and understandeth it not then cometh the wicked one and catcheth away that which was sown in his heart Thirdly Endeavour to fix the word of God in their memories cause them often to rehearse what you have taught them exhort them to meditate and ponder upon those Instructions they have received from you This will be a means of ingrafting the word of God in their hearts As the remembring of our sins is a means of engraving our iniquities upon our hearts Jer. 17.1 2. The sin of Judah is written with a pen of Iron and with the point of a Diamond it is graven upon the Table of their Hearts and upon the Horns of their Altars whilst their Children remember their Altars and their Groves So remembring and pondering upon the Word of God will be a means of graving or writing the Word of God upon our hearts Prov. 3.1 3. My Son forget not my Law but let thine heart keep my Commandments Bind them about thy Neck write them upon the Table of thine Heart The binding of the Commandments about the Neck is the same with not forgetting the Law mentioned vers 1. This binding of the Law about the Neck was used by the Jews as a Memorial to help them to keep the Commandments of God in remembrance Exod. 13.9 Now Solomon joyning these two together Bind them about thy Neck write them upon the Table of thine Heart implies that the binding of the Commandments about our Neck that is the keeping them in remembrance will be a means to write them upon our Hearts Fourthly Inure them to godly Discourse When they are in your presence speak often to them of the word of God and when they are discoursing one with another exhort them to discourse of what you have taught them out of the word of God Discoursing out of the word will be a means of imprinting the Law of God upon their hearts Psal 37.30 31. The mouth of the Righteous speaketh wisdom and his tongue talketh of judgment And what is the fruit and effect of this good discourse
bring their fruit to perfection and to that end put them in mind that it is the will of God that we should not only labour to be holy but that we should labour to perfect holiness in the fear of God 2 Cor. 7.1 And caution them against those things which do hinder the seed of the Word from growing to perfection as the cares of this life pleasures unmortified lusts Luke 8.14 Mark 4.19 Keeping company with men of corrupt minds and corrupt conversations 1 Cor. 15.33 Be not deceived evil communications corrupt good manners Giving heed to such as teach false Doctrine will endanger their overthrow and prove destructive to them 1 Tim. 4.1 Now the Spirit speaketh expresly that in the latter times some shall depart from the faith giving heed to seducing Spirits Seducers are those Foxes that spoil the Vine that hath tender Grapes against whom the Church prays Cant. 2.15 Take us the Foxes the little Foxes that spoil the Vines for our Vines have tender Grapes 7. Counsel them well to consider into what Families they dispose themselves when God shall by his providence remove them out of your Family That they do not for the gaining of more wages or easier work put themselves into such Families where they shall have no instruction lest that good Work which is begun in them cease and come to nothing While Jehoash was instructed he did that which was right in the sight of the Lord 2 Kings 12.2 Jehoash did that which was right in the sight of the Lord all his days wherein Jehoiada the Priest instructed him But when Jehoiada that instructed him was dead Jehoash fell into Idolatry and other great sins 2 Chron. 24.17 18 19 21. 8. If any of the Members of your Family do find that God hath done their Souls good by the Instructions that you have given them counsel and exhort them by way of gratitude if ever God shall give them Families to teach and train up their Families in the knowledge of Gods Word Thirdly If upon communing with your Families you find they have gotten no good by those Instructions and godly Lessons which you have given them Then 1. Inform them what a great sin and how dangerous it is to enjoy great means of Grace and to remain graceless and barren under them Heb. 6.7.8 The Earth which drinketh in the rain that cometh oft upon it and bringeth forth herbs meet for them by whom it is dressed receiveth blessing from God but that which beareth Thorns and Bryars is rejected and is nigh unto cursing whose end is to be burned Matth. 3.10 And now also the Ax is laid to the Root of the Trees therefore every Tree which bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down and is cast into the fire 2. See whence their unprofitableness proceeds whether the cause of it be in your selves that you teach them things that are too high for them or that you do not make things plain to their understandings or that you do not teach them by your Example as well as Doctrine or that yo do not water your Seed that you sow with your Prayers and tears or that you teach them so seldom or in such a slight manner Or whether the cause of their unprofitableness be in themselves as their not minding what you teach them their forgetfulness c. And where-ever the ground of their unprofitableness lieth endeavour to get it removed 3. Direct them what means they should use that they may profit by what you teach them as 1. To look up to the Lord who alone can teach them to profit Isa 48.17 2. To mingle the Word of God with faith Heb. 4.2 3. To meditate often on those things wherein they are instructed Meditation on the Word of God will be a great help to their profiting both in knowledge and grace 1 Tim. 4.15 Meditate on these things that thy profiting may appear unto all Fourthly If upon discoursing with them you find they rest in a form of Godliness and have only a notional knowledge of the word of God without the favour and practice of those Truths that you have taught them Then 1. Inform them that knowledge without practice will never make them happy Joh. 13.17 but will aggravate their condemnation and cause God to beat them with many stripes Luk. 12.47 And that the form of Godliness will profit them nothing but the life and power of Godliness will be profitable for all things and give them an interest in all Gods promises whether they concern this life or the life to come 1 Tim. 4.8 2. Direct them what means they should use that they may not only have a barren and unfruitful notional knowledge of the things of God but that they may relish savour and practise what they know As namely 1. Exhort them to get Faith Temperance Patience Godliness Brotherly Kindness and Charity The Apostle having spoken of these Graces saith 2 Pet. 1.8 If these things be in you and abound they make you that you shall neither be barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ 2. Exhort them to plead Gods Covenant where God hath promised not only to put his Laws into our minds that is to give us the knowledge and remembrance of his will but also to write them in our hearts that is to incline our wills to embrace love and obey his Laws Heb. 8.10 I will put my Laws into their minds and write them in their hearts 3. Stir them up to cry unto God who hath taught them to know his will to encline their hearts to do his will and to keep his Commandments Psal 119.36 Incline mine heart unto thy Testimonies Psal 143.10 Teach me to do thy will Fifthly If you find any of your Family in a declining withering condition 1. Warn them betimes of the evil of a decaying declining frame of spirit The Church of Ephesus had many things for which Christ gives her great commendations Rev. 2.2 3. yet having lost her first love he gives her a sharp rebuke vers 4. 2. Exhort them to remember whence they are fallen and to repent and do their first works lest God send some sudden and sore Judgment upon them Rev. 2.5 3. Stir them up to act their faith upon such promises where God hath promised to heal our backslidings and restore our souls and to recover us from a decayed frame of spirit by causing us to grow in grace as Hos 14.4 5. I will heal their backslidings I will love them freely I will be as the dew unto Israel he shall be as the Lilly and cast forth his roots as Lebanon This promise is made unto Israel that was fallen into great decay Vers 1. O Israel thou hast fallen by thine iniquity Israel was so far fallen that God complains O Israel thou hast destroyed thy self Yet to Israel that was fallen thus low God promiseth to heal their back-slidings and to love them freely and to be as the dew to them