little_a or_o no_o service_n but_o i_o rest_v content_v herein_o see_v god_n hereby_o do_v magnify_v his_o goodness_n and_o mercy_n to_o i_o i_o doubt_v not_o but_o there_o be_v many_o soul_n in_o heaven_n who_o have_v in_o the_o eye_n of_o the_o world_n do_v little_a service_n for_o god_n as_o solitare_v in_o the_o desert_n and_o many_o person_n without_o talent_n and_o yet_o have_v high_a place_n in_o the_o mansion_n of_o eternity_n they_o spend_v all_o their_o time_n to_o purify_v their_o interiour_n by_o be_v faithful_a to_o the_o grace_n they_o have_v receive_v from_o the_o infinite_a bounty_n of_o god_n and_o the_o service_n they_o render_v he_o to_o the_o glory_n of_o his_o name_n be_v only_o write_v in_o his_o omniscience_n but_o will_v be_v lay_v open_a to_o the_o world_n at_o the_o great_a day_n of_o manifestation_n chap._n v._o of_o the_o impediment_n of_o prayer_n i_o clear_o see_v and_o know_v by_o experience_n that_o the_o temporal_a affair_n of_o our_o oeconomy_n do_v not_o a_o little_a take_v we_o off_o from_o god_n we_o do_v ill_o in_o it_o yea_o it_o be_v our_o obligation_n it_o be_v please_v to_o god_n to_o manage_v our_o temporal_n with_o a_o good_a intention_n though_o it_o will_v be_v better_o if_o we_o can_v to_o lay_v aside_o these_o worldly_a distraction_n to_o spend_v our_o time_n only_o in_o god_n service_n and_o those_o who_o have_v a_o call_v from_o god_n to_o attend_v on_o he_o alone_o in_o a_o state_n of_o prayer_n and_o contemplation_n can_v without_o be_v unfaithful_a to_o his_o grace_n continue_v in_o the_o solicitous_a distraction_n of_o worldly_a affair_n i_o must_v needs_o say_v that_o worldly_a business_n darken_v and_o hinder_v my_o soul_n in_o her_o spiritual_a exercise_n and_o i_o will_v never_o spend_v time_n therein_o upon_o humane_a consideration_n but_o pure_o because_o god_n have_v so_o order_v it_o however_o it_o must_v be_v our_o care_n not_o to_o spend_v more_o time_n therein_o than_o necessity_n require_v too_o delicate_a diet_n though_o it_o may_v strengthen_v nature_n yet_o it_o weaken_v grace_n when_o the_o body_n be_v bring_v down_o by_o abstinence_n the_o soul_n be_v more_o vigorous_a in_o her_o elevation_n to_o god_n i_o find_v this_o true_a in_o i_o by_o experience_n a_o soul_n must_v be_v very_o well_o ground_v in_o grace_n that_o among_o temporal_a employment_n and_o worldly_a care_n can_v keep_v herself_o up_o in_o fervour_n and_o purity_n she_o meet_v with_o a_o thousand_o occasion_n to_o move_v she_o to_o anger_n impatience_n sadness_n and_o vain_a joy_n and_o though_o she_o do_v not_o give_v way_n to_o they_o yet_o she_o be_v sensible_a of_o they_o and_o this_o must_v needs_o more_o or_o less_o disturb_v she_o interiour_n peace_n whereby_o she_o be_v unite_v to_o god_n her_o happiness_n a_o little_a thing_n will_v hinder_v a_o soul_n from_o raise_v herself_o to_o contemplation_n and_o a_o less_o matter_n will_v somewhat_o darken_v she_o when_o elevate_v because_o the_o least_o emotion_n of_o spirit_n will_v indispose_v she_o to_o receive_v divine_a impression_n therefore_o a_o man_n of_o prayer_n must_v be_v a_o man_n dead_a and_o mortify_v for_o that_o be_v not_o pure_a prayer_n which_o do_v not_o work_v in_o we_o a_o victory_n over_o our_o passion_n and_o vicious_a inclination_n and_o bring_v we_o to_o the_o practice_n of_o all_o christian_a virtue_n i_o see_v now_o more_o clear_o than_o ever_o that_o the_o spirit_n of_o prayer_n do_v not_o persevere_v and_o gather_v strength_n but_o in_o those_o who_o be_v dead_a to_o sensuality_n austere_a to_o themselves_o penitent_a and_o disengage_v from_o whatsoever_o be_v not_o god_n it_o be_v true_a as_o for_o corporal_a austerity_n a_o tender_a complexion_n must_v follow_v the_o council_n of_o a_o director_n but_o common_o we_o be_v too_o indulgent_a to_o ourselves_o and_o far_o from_o the_o practice_n of_o great_a penitent_n who_o be_v very_o severe_a to_o themselves_o and_o also_o great_a contemplative_n we_o deceive_v ourselves_o if_o we_o think_v to_o enter_v into_o a_o state_n of_o prayer_n and_o take_v delight_n in_o worldly_a thing_n though_o in_o rigour_n this_o may_v in_o some_o sort_n be_v permit_v to_o candidate_n of_o devotion_n yet_o not_o to_o proficient_n in_o who_o the_o spirit_n of_o prayer_n and_o conformity_n to_o jesus_n christ_n crucify_a aught_o to_o be_v whole_o predominant_a for_o it_o be_v our_o duty_n to_o live_v conformable_o to_o that_o state_n where_o god_n have_v put_v we_o gerson_n say_v very_o well_o if_o we_o refuse_v exterior_a consolation_n we_o shall_v receive_v interiour_n the_o reason_n hereof_o seem_v to_o i_o to_o be_v this_o because_o interiour_n consolation_n participate_v of_o the_o purity_n of_o their_o source_n which_o be_v the_o union_n of_o god_n with_o the_o soul_n and_o will_v not_o permit_v any_o mixture_n with_o impurity_n and_o imperfection_n for_o sensual_a joy_n and_o consolation_n be_v earthly_a impure_a and_o imperfect_a and_o consequent_o be_v contrary_a to_o the_o spirit_n of_o grace_n which_o make_v the_o soul_n pure_a and_o penitent_a and_o mortify_v to_o the_o thing_n of_o this_o life_n moreover_o interiour_n consolation_n be_v slender_a participation_n of_o those_o infinite_a delight_n which_o god_n have_v in_o himself_o of_o himself_o and_o he_o be_v jealous_a of_o such_o favour_n not_o communicate_v they_o but_o to_o a_o soul_n entire_o belove_v that_o take_v no_o delight_n but_o in_o he_o alone_o but_o when_o earthly_a consolation_n enter_v into_o a_o soul_n they_o draw_v she_o partly_o from_o god_n and_o so_o god_n withdraw_v his_o favour_n from_o she_o for_o this_o reason_n the_o saint_n who_o will_v be_v whole_o for_o god_n mortify_v themselves_o without_o reserve_n as_o much_o as_o humane_a weakness_n will_v permit_v that_o no_o sensual_a or_o worldly_a pleasure_n may_v have_v any_o part_n in_o their_o affection_n but_o god_n alone_o take_v courage_n o_o my_o soul_n let_v we_o embrace_v the_o cross_n and_o follow_v jesus_n christ_n who_o will_v conduct_v we_o through_o the_o garden_n of_o his_o delight_n let_v we_o not_o trouble_v ourselves_o with_o worldly_a affair_n unless_o we_o know_v it_o be_v the_o will_n of_o god_n for_o otherwise_o we_o shall_v find_v affliction_n of_o spirit_n and_o decay_v in_o spirituality_n thrice_o happy_a be_v he_o who_o shun_v multiplicity_n for_o this_o will_v dispose_v he_o to_o pure_a love_n many_o thing_n seem_v to_o we_o necessary_a which_o serve_v but_o to_o entertain_v the_o corruption_n of_o nature_n still_o work_v in_o we_o if_o god_n shall_v severe_o examine_v all_o our_o action_n perhaps_o he_o will_v hardly_o find_v one_o in_o all_o respect_n well_o please_v to_o he_o we_o too_o much_o follow_v nature_n and_o our_o humane_a inclination_n if_o grace_n set_v we_o a_o work_n we_o hardly_o go_v through_o with_o it_o but_o nature_n creep_v in_o some_o way_n or_o other_o to_o sully_v our_o action_n what_o be_v pure_o natural_a can_v be_v meritorious_a all_o merit_n proceed_v from_o a_o principle_n of_o grace_n and_o therefore_o no_o action_n but_o what_o have_v a_o influence_n from_o grace_n can_v dispose_v we_o to_o a_o union_n with_o god_n o_o how_o rare_a a_o thing_n be_v pure_a virtue_n that_o which_o seem_v best_a be_v not_o for_o the_o most_o part_n without_o some_o blemish_n those_o who_o have_v illustration_n from_o heaven_n discover_v these_o impurity_n other_o in_o the_o dark_a see_v nothing_o but_o grosser_n fault_n and_o imperfection_n from_o all_o this_o we_o may_v conclude_v that_o there_o be_v principal_o four_o great_a obstacle_n which_o hinder_v for_o the_o most_o part_n the_o exercise_n of_o prayer_n 1._o to_o engage_v ourselves_o in_o worldly_a affair_n more_o than_o the_o order_n of_o god_n require_v 2._o to_o be_v too_o delicate_a and_o use_v very_o little_a corporal_a austerity_n 3._o to_o practise_v little_a either_o interiour_n or_o exterior_a retreat_n and_o to_o have_v no_o love_n for_o recollection_n and_o for_o solitude_n 4._o want_v of_o zeal_n and_o courage_n in_o the_o way_n of_o god_n and_o so_o live_v a_o life_n mere_o humane_a by_o follow_v our_o naetural_a inclination_n but_o he_o shall_v never_o be_v a_o man_n of_o prayer_n who_o do_v not_o live_v a_o supernatural_a life_n and_o practise_v all_o christian_a virtue_n with_o a_o faithful_a and_o generou_n resolution_n and_o bless_a be_v he_o who_o by_o his_o constancy_n in_o spiritual_a exercise_n have_v bring_v his_o soul_n to_o such_o a_o temper_n that_o it_o be_v in_o a_o manner_n as_o easy_a for_o he_o to_o pray_v as_o breath_n hic_fw-la accipiet_fw-la benedictionem_fw-la à _fw-la domino_fw-la &_o misericordiam_fw-la à _fw-la deo_fw-la salutari_fw-la svo_fw-la quia_fw-la haec_fw-la est_fw-la generatio_fw-la quaerentium_fw-la dominum_fw-la he_o that_o thus_o seek_v god_n while_o he_o may_v be_v find_v shall_v enjoy_v he_o there_o where_o he_o can_v never_o be_v lose_v chap._n
bless_a in_o heaven_n be_v enjoyment_n but_o we_o traveller_n on_o earth_n ought_v to_o desire_v nothing_o more_o than_o to_o suffer_v for_o jesus_n this_o suffer_v do_v mortify_v old_a adam_n in_o we_o by_o holy_a violence_n make_v we_o die_v to_o the_o world_n and_o separate_v from_o we_o whatever_o be_v impure_a and_o earthy_a as_o gold_n be_v purify_v in_o a_o burn_a furnace_n our_o corruption_n can_v be_v ruin_v but_o either_o by_o fire_n or_o the_o sword_n of_o affliction_n which_o shall_v induce_v we_o to_o embrace_v they_o with_o contentment_n see_v the_o more_o we_o suffer_v the_o more_o we_o be_v purify_v let_v we_o have_v a_o honourable_a esteem_n for_o the_o great_a cross_n because_o they_o work_v in_o we_o the_o profound_a purity_n and_o the_o pure_a love_n of_o god_n which_o be_v the_o life_n of_o our_o soul_n and_o the_o end_n of_o our_o creation_n i_o be_o much_o please_v with_o my_o present_a state_n of_o affliction_n see_v it_o be_v the_o ready_a way_n to_o form_n jesus_n christ_n in_o i_o and_o make_v i_o a_o perfect_a christian_a which_o be_v the_o work_n of_o work_n the_o high_a honour_n the_o rich_a treasure_n and_o the_o sovereign_a happiness_n of_o this_o life_n while_o we_o be_v pilgrim_n on_o earth_n we_o be_v exile_n from_o god_n presence_n which_o must_v needs_o be_v a_o cross_n to_o soul_n that_o sigh_v after_o the_o beatifical_a vision_n i_o know_v not_o how_o it_o be_v but_o methinks_v i_o see_v more_o purity_n of_o love_n of_o resignation_n of_o perfection_n in_o my_o present_a suffer_a condition_n than_o what_o i_o have_v find_v in_o the_o joy_n of_o union_n which_o put_v my_o heart_n in_o repose_n and_o quiet_a it_o seem_v to_o i_o that_o i_o can_v say_v more_o true_o than_o at_o other_o time_n o_o my_o god_n what_o do_v i_o desire_v in_o heaven_n or_o on_o earth_n but_o you_o who_o be_v my_o portion_n and_o my_o heritage_n for_o ever_o my_o life_n be_v crucify_a with_o jesus_n christ_n and_o altogether_o hide_v with_o he_o in_o the_o good_a pleasure_n of_o god_n to_o send_v we_o cross_n and_o make_v we_o content_a with_o a_o suffer_a condition_n be_v one_o of_o the_o choice_a effect_n of_o the_o providence_n of_o god_n see_v he_o have_v a_o infinite_a love_n for_o himself_o his_o will_n be_v that_o all_o creature_n capable_a of_o his_o love_n shall_v love_v he_o also_o to_o dispose_v they_o thereto_o the_o better_a he_o send_v they_o cross_n which_o purify_v our_o corrupt_a nature_n and_o produce_v in_o we_o disposition_n fit_a for_o divine_a impression_n o_o infinite_a goodness_n o_o merciful_a justice_n i_o return_v you_o thanks_o with_o all_o my_o heart_n that_o you_o have_v afflict_v i_o to_o make_v i_o love_v you_o loss_n contempt_n poverty_n suffering_n come_v you_o be_v welcome_a my_o heart_n be_v open_a to_o give_v you_o entertainment_n behold_v i_o receive_v you_o with_o open_a arm_n because_o you_o bring_v with_o you_o divine_a love_n chap._n iu._n god_n be_v please_v to_o send_v we_o cross_n in_o the_o place_n of_o persecution_n that_o our_o life_n may_v be_v a_o continual_a martyrdom_n i_o be_o much_o take_v with_o this_o say_v of_o st._n clement_n of_o alexandria_n that_o see_v our_o love_n and_o fidelity_n to_o god_n do_v not_o at_o present_a appear_v by_o shed_v our_o blood_n for_o our_o faith_n the_o persecution_n of_o tyrant_n be_v cease_v we_o must_v now_o manifest_v they_o by_o make_v our_o faith_n visible_a in_o all_o our_o action_n to_o do_v the_o will_n of_o god_n be_v a_o great_a testimony_n of_o our_o love_n to_o he_o but_o it_o be_v a_o far_o great_a to_o suffer_v for_o he_o soul_n love_v god_n and_o belove_v of_o he_o be_v careful_a to_o correspond_v to_o divine_a grace_n whether_o by_o act_v or_o suffer_v and_o be_v so_o courageous_a in_o their_o resolution_n that_o no_o humane_a fear_n though_o of_o loss_n of_o life_n itself_o be_v able_a to_o stop_v the_o torrent_n of_o their_o affection_n witness_v that_o good_a religious_a man_n who_o ask_v his_o spiritual_a guide_n whether_o it_o be_v not_o better_a to_o die_v than_o complain_v of_o the_o infirmarian_n who_o provide_v diet_n not_o proper_a for_o he_o we_o now_o suffer_v more_o notable_o in_o some_o thing_n than_o the_o martyr_n of_o old_a by_o bloody_a persecutor_n for_o our_o cross_n interiour_n or_o exterior_a be_v impression_n of_o the_o divine_a holiness_n though_o they_o separate_v not_o the_o soul_n from_o the_o body_n yet_o they_o separate_v the_o soul_n from_o the_o love_n of_o all_o creature_n to_o unite_v we_o to_o god_n alone_o this_o holiness_n of_o god_n have_v a_o infinite_a abhorrence_n of_o whatsoever_o be_v not_o pure_a and_o holy_a delight_v to_o purify_v the_o elect_a by_o tribulation_n as_o gold_n in_o the_o fire_n when_o therefore_o the_o soul_n feel_v herself_o as_o it_o be_v nail_v to_o the_o cross_n by_o dereliction_n aridity_n and_o interiour_n suffering_n let_v she_o not_o strive_v to_o free_v herself_o but_o continue_v in_o this_o suffer_a content_o as_o long_o as_o please_v god_n because_o hereby_o she_o glorify_v he_o and_o purify_v herself_o seeing_z it_o be_v certain_a that_o the_o cross_n be_v the_o source_n of_o grace_n and_o purity_n we_o be_v inconsiderate_a to_o complain_v and_o shun_v affliction_n for_o we_o flee_v from_o our_o advancement_n in_o spirituality_n and_o the_o purity_n of_o love_n neither_o will_v we_o permit_v god_n to_o accomplish_v in_o we_o his_o good_a pleasure_n to_o die_v naked_a on_o the_o cross_n be_v the_o ultimate_a disposition_n of_o pure_a love_n it_o be_v in_o vain_a to_o pretend_v to_o the_o perfection_n of_o divine_a love_n unless_o with_o st._n teresa_n we_o desire_v either_o to_o die_v or_o suffer_v the_o holy_a martyr_n can_v not_o attain_v it_o but_o by_o die_v for_o god_n nor_o we_o except_v by_o suffer_v for_o he_o when_o i_o be_o in_o prayer_n in_o the_o presence_n of_o god_n i_o be_o much_o ashamed_a of_o myself_o to_o suffer_v so_o little_a and_o with_o so_o much_o imperfection_n in_o a_o manner_n so_o different_a from_o the_o saint_n i_o be_o in_o such_o confusion_n hereat_o that_o i_o dare_v hardly_o stay_v in_o god_n presence_n be_v it_o not_o that_o to_o repair_v my_o misery_n and_o make_v he_o satisfaction_n i_o offer_v up_o to_o he_o jesus_n suffer_v poor_a and_o abject_a for_o we_o sinner_n and_o thereupon_o i_o make_v resolution_n to_o endure_v whatsoever_o cross_n happen_v to_o i_o with_o all_o the_o fidelity_n that_o grace_n require_v it_o seem_v to_o i_o that_o a_o soul_n can_v hardly_o be_v content_a without_o some_o suffer_a or_o other_o i_o have_v have_v experience_n hereof_o in_o some_o little_a tempest_n that_o now_o be_v over_o and_o which_o be_v more_o i_o can_v believe_v so_o much_o content_a may_v be_v take_v in_o limit_v our_o suffering_n as_o desire_v great_a if_o god_n think_v good_a because_o the_o peace_n and_o content_a of_o the_o soul_n consist_v in_o love_v and_o love_n be_v best_a satisfy_v with_o what_o most_o please_v god_n and_o therefore_o in_o suffer_v for_o he_o from_o these_o word_n of_o our_o bless_a saviour_n if_o any_o one_o will_v come_v after_o i_o he_o must_v deny_v himself_o and_o take_v up_o his_o cross_n and_o follow_v i_o i_o learn_v that_o the_o state_n of_o this_o present_a corrupt_a life_n require_v that_o we_o must_v live_v in_o a_o continual_a die_a to_o the_o world_n see_v the_o enjoyment_n of_o creature_n do_v too_o much_o work_v upon_o our_o weakness_n to_o bring_v we_o off_o from_o god_n our_o corruption_n and_o the_o long_a habit_n of_o take_v pleasure_n in_o the_o thing_n of_o this_o world_n make_v it_o very_o difficult_a for_o we_o to_o live_v this_o die_a life_n which_o be_v a_o great_a cross_n and_o a_o long_a martyrdom_n it_o can_v be_v deny_v but_o we_o must_v suffer_v much_o to_o arrive_v to_o the_o possession_n of_o god_n in_o a_o supernatural_a life_n however_o to_o taste_v the_o sweetness_n of_o god_n for_o one_o moment_n do_v infinite_o transcend_v the_o pain_n of_o gain_v he_o and_o when_o he_o hide_v himself_o and_o try_v we_o with_o dereliction_n what_o a_o cross_n be_v it_o it_o be_v a_o state_n of_o great_a perfection_n indeed_o to_o be_v content_a without_o comfort_n both_o divine_a and_o humane_a many_o martyr_n have_v suffer_v less_o in_o die_v for_o god_n than_o the_o soul_n do_v sometime_o in_o this_o condition_n patience_n a_o little_a and_o god_n ever_o long_o will_v sufficient_o recompense_v we_o with_o abundance_n of_o his_o grace_n and_o consolation_n sometime_o god_n seem_v to_o abandon_v his_o most_o faithful_a servant_n as_o he_o deal_v with_o holy_a job_n permit_v satan_n to_o assault_v they_o with_o several_a temptation_n sometime_o against_o charity_n sometime_o against_o chastity_n and_o sometime_o against_o faith_n it_o be_v
by_o jesus_n christ_n there_o be_v no_o other_o mean_n to_o attain_v salvation_n 6._o that_o the_o sacred_a trinity_n which_o consist_v in_o the_o perfect_a knowledge_n and_o pure_a love_n of_o the_o divine_a person_n be_v the_o true_a model_n of_o perfect_a prayer_n these_o deep_o consider_v be_v very_o instrumental_a to_o elevate_v a_o contemplative_a soul_n to_o so_o high_a a_o pitch_n that_o sometimos_fw-la she_o in_o a_o wonderful_a manner_n participate_v of_o that_o life_n eternal_a which_o be_v in_o god_n himself_o i_o have_v make_v a_o resolution_n to_o desire_v of_o god_n that_o my_o prayer_n may_v be_v altogether_o intellectual_a to_o the_o end_n i_o may_v not_o feel_v such_o sensible_a gust_n of_o heavenly_a consolation_n which_o prejudice_n nature_n these_o be_v but_o sweet_a baiâ—s_n for_o self-love_n which_o sully_n the_o purity_n of_o prayer_n and_o diminish_v the_o contemplative_a attention_n which_o continue_v more_o strong_a and_o vigorous_a when_o keep_v on_o the_o point_n of_o the_o spirit_n whereby_o the_o fire_n of_o divine_a love_n burn_v bright_a and_o with_o more_o constant_a flame_n this_o be_v that_o continual_a union_n which_o be_v the_o object_n of_o perfection_n and_o whatever_o hinder_v this_o aught_o to_o be_v suspect_v as_o be_v sensible_a gust_n of_o devotion_n in_o inferior_a nature_n o_o my_o soul_n let_v we_o therefore_o entire_o give_v up_o ourselves_o to_o god_n in_o prayer_n to_o receive_v from_o he_o such_o impression_n as_o he_o think_v best_o let_v our_o chief_a care_n be_v full_o to_o submit_v ourselves_o to_o he_o and_o to_o be_v disengage_v from_o all_o worldly_a thing_n and_o accept_v with_o thankfulness_n whatever_o he_o give_v we_o if_o he_o give_v we_o nothing_o let_v nothing_o content_v we_o and_o peaceable_o acquiesce_v in_o union_n with_o his_o divine_a will._n a_o soul_n faithful_a in_o the_o state_n of_o privation_n will_v soon_o or_o late_a as_o god_n see_v best_a be_v raise_v to_o pure_a union_n and_o enjoyment_n on_o the_o lofty_a wing_n of_o contemplation_n chap._n ix_o of_o the_o prayer_n of_o faith_n this_o prayer_n be_v a_o bare_a reflection_n or_o simple_a remembrance_n of_o god_n who_o be_v believe_v by_o naked_a faith_n as_o he_o be_v see_v and_o know_v by_o the_o light_n of_o glory_n it_o be_v the_o same_o object_n here_o and_o there_o but_o know_v by_o the_o soul_n in_o a_o different_a manner_n the_o way_n of_o know_v god_n here_o be_v but_o learned_a ignorance_n earth_n be_v the_o land_n of_o believe_v heaven_n of_o see_v to_o see_v god_n as_o we_o be_v see_v of_o he_o and_o understand_v all_o divine_a mystery_n be_v reserve_v for_o the_o light_n of_o glory_n here_o we_o must_v walk_v by_o the_o obscurity_n of_o faith_n this_o faith_n must_v be_v naked_a without_o image_n or_o representation_n simple_a and_o without_o discourse_n universal_a without_o a_o distinct_a consideration_n of_o particular_n the_o operation_n of_o the_o will_n be_v conform_v to_o that_o of_o the_o understanding_n naked_a simple_a universal_a spiritual_a independent_a on_o the_o sense_n we_o must_v expect_v great_a combat_n in_o this_o way_n from_o our_o spirit_n which_o will_v still_o be_v work_v and_o rely_v on_o creature_n but_o though_o it_o be_v much_o distaste_v by_o the_o understand_a part_n of_o the_o soul_n yet_o she_o must_v strive_v to_o die_v to_o her_o own_o operation_n and_o willing_o entertain_v what_o help_v she_o in_o this_o combat_n as_o aridity_n privation_n desolation_n which_o at_o last_o leave_v the_o soul_n in_o exercise_n of_o pure_a faith_n whereby_o god_n be_v know_v in_o a_o high_a manner_n than_o those_o light_n which_o serve_v as_o a_o medium_fw-la between_o god_n and_o the_o soul_n for_o this_o union_n of_o our_o spirit_n with_o god_n by_o pure_a faith_n be_v immediate_a and_o so_o more_o elevate_v the_o will_v also_o must_v die_v to_o what_o ever_o be_v not_o god_n to_o live_v only_o in_o he_o and_o to_o he_o by_o pure_a love_n for_o the_o life_n of_o the_o will_n be_v this_o death_n and_o this_o death_n be_v not_o ordinary_o wrought_v but_o by_o privation_n this_o kind_n of_o prayer_n be_v uniform_a and_o not_o much_o liable_a to_o alteration_n nor_o bring_v any_o damage_n to_o the_o body_n for_o nature_n have_v nothing_o to_o do_v in_o it_o be_v not_o procurable_a by_o great_a endeavour_n of_o humane_a industry_n but_o depend_v pure_o on_o the_o will_n of_o god_n who_o alone_o give_v it_o when_o and_o to_o who_o he_o please_v it_o be_v true_a this_o pure_a and_o naked_a contemplation_n of_o god_n by_o faith_n be_v give_v but_o rare_o and_o to_o those_o who_o have_v pass_v through_o many_o purgatory_n and_o state_n of_o penance_n to_o fit_v they_o for_o it_o in_o the_o beginning_n it_o dart_v into_o the_o soul_n but_o transient_a irradiation_n like_o flash_n of_o lightning_n if_o at_o any_o time_n they_o continue_v about_o half_a a_o hour_n it_o be_v very_o much_o however_o they_o work_v in_o the_o soul_n very_o great_a effect_n one_o of_o the_o principal_n be_v that_o this_o light_n of_o faith_n discover_v to_o we_o the_o verity_n of_o divine_a mystery_n imperfection_n and_o the_o perfection_n we_o want_v and_o practical_a virtue_n and_o all_o this_o at_o once_o not_o successive_o one_o after_o another_o by_o discourse_n which_o can_v never_o arrive_v to_o produce_v a_o knowledge_n so_o clear_a and_o universal_a but_o indeed_o the_o understanding_n have_v much_o ado_n to_o die_v to_o its_o own_o operation_n and_o not_o act_v by_o humane_a light_n by_o be_v whole_o give_v up_o to_o the_o obscurity_n of_o faith_n however_o this_o must_v be_v do_v to_o be_v right_o dispose_v for_o divine_a operation_n there_o be_v divers_a degree_n of_o contemplation_n but_o what_o god_n be_v please_v to_o give_v we_o must_v be_v receive_v with_o submissive_a thankfulness_n while_o we_o live_v in_o mortal_a body_n we_o shall_v have_v always_o something_o to_o purify_v and_o therefore_o always_o something_a to_o suffer_v three_o part_n of_o our_o life_n pass_v away_o in_o a_o suffer_a condition_n in_o a_o state_n of_o obscurity_n the_o soul_n be_v intimate_o unite_v to_o god_n although_o she_o be_v not_o sensible_a thereof_o i_o be_o much_o take_v with_o the_o way_n of_o pure_a faith_n in_o prayer_n whereby_o the_o soul_n know_v god_n as_o much_o as_o she_o can_v do_v in_o this_o life_n and_o though_o it_o be_v obscure_a it_o matter_n not_o be_v sure_a and_o certain_a for_o my_o part_n take_v as_o much_o as_o you_o will_v of_o my_o light_n of_o reason_n if_o the_o light_n of_o faith_n increase_v thereby_o o_o how_o beautiful_a be_v pure_a and_o naked_a faith_n it_o much_o conduce_v to_o spiritualise_v a_o soul_n to_o live_v continual_o by_o faith_n to_o esteem_v and_o love_v nothing_o but_o what_o we_o ought_v to_o esteem_v and_o love_n man_n rare_o will_v relinquish_v his_o reason_n and_o nevertheless_o he_o must_v raise_v himself_o above_o it_o or_o drag_v on_o the_o earth_n with_o imperfection_n faith_n be_v a_o participation_n of_o the_o eternal_a wisdom_n she_o only_o conduct_n we_o with_o true_a assurance_n for_o her_o light_n though_o dark_a be_v certain_a and_o their_o obscurity_n do_v incomparable_o transcend_v the_o clear_a evidence_n of_o natural_a reason_n moreover_o to_o make_v prayer_n more_o intellectual_a and_o that_o nature_n may_v have_v no_o hand_n in_o it_o we_o must_v leave_v off_o some_o thing_n which_o usual_o do_v raise_v our_o heart_n to_o god_n with_o a_o sensible_a devotion_n as_o music_n rich_a ornament_n devout_a picture_n in_o church_n and_o the_o like_a this_o be_v good_a and_o profitable_a in_o the_o begin_n of_o a_o spiritual_a life_n and_o some_o time_n after_o but_o when_o a_o soul_n have_v attain_v purity_n of_o prayer_n there_o be_v no_o need_n to_o take_v her_o nourishment_n that_o be_v her_o knowledge_n and_o love_n but_o from_o pure_a faith_n and_o supernatural_a light_n infuse_v into_o she_o when_o we_o take_v not_o good_a heed_n we_o keep_v not_o ourselves_o sufficient_o passive_a to_o the_o operation_n of_o god_n but_o we_o go_v a_o bege_n for_o the_o life_n of_o the_o soul_n to_o sensible_a object_n when_o god_n himself_o will_v nourish_v she_o with_o more_o purify_a knowledge_n and_o divine_a love_n why_o shall_v we_o hanker_v after_o sensible_a gust_n of_o devotion_n see_v nature_n be_v common_o too_o much_o take_v with_o they_o to_o the_o damage_n of_o naked_a faith_n and_o the_o hindrance_n of_o our_o pure_a union_n with_o god_n which_o require_v a_o total_a denudation_n of_o all_o creature_n notwithstanding_o when_o god_n try_v we_o with_o dereliction_n and_o give_v we_o not_o admittance_n into_o his_o presence_n but_o by_o thing_n sensible_a and_o discursive_a prayer_n we_o must_v humble_o comply_v with_o this_o state_n and_o not_o pretend_v to_o high_a elevation_n in_o our_o address_n to_o he_o yet_o if_o a_o soul_n in_o
by_o this_o fault_n i_o may_v see_v my_o nothing_o my_o weakness_n my_o inclination_n to_o evil_a more_o clear_o than_o former_o i_o be_v miserable_a and_o i_o do_v not_o know_v it_o i_o be_v frailty_n itself_o and_o i_o do_v not_o perceive_v it_o but_o 〈…〉_o acknowledge_v my_o vileness_n though_o i_o can_v 〈◊〉_d fathom_v the_o depth_n thereof_o 〈…〉_o i_o be_o well-pleased_a that_o this_o fault_n happen_v 〈◊〉_d presence_n of_o my_o friend_n who_o will_v thereâ—â—â—â—_n 〈◊〉_d â—ow_o what_o i_o be_o it_o much_o displease_v i_o to_o 〈◊〉_d offend_v god_n by_o be_v so_o faithless_a to_o his_o â—â—â—ces_n but_o i_o joy_v in_o this_o that_o i_o be_o well-pleased_a â—â—th_v my_o humiliation_n it_o be_v a_o good_a hap_n to_o be_v deâ—â—â—sed_v in_o the_o esteem_n of_o other_o and_o do_v relish_v â—weet_a to_o such_o who_o desire_v to_o repair_v the_o injury_n â—hey_n have_v do_v to_o god_n by_o sin_v against_o he_o to_o be_v powerful_o convince_v of_o our_o pure_a nothing_o and_o great_a frailty_n be_v the_o profit_n we_o ought_v to_o make_v of_o our_o imperfection_n how_o profitable_a be_v the_o discovery_n of_o my_o misery_n to_o i_o see_v it_o make_v clear_a unto_o i_o all_o these_o verity_n this_o be_v the_o truth_n of_o it_o i_o be_o nothing_o but_o infirmity_n and_o corruption_n and_o more_o than_o i_o can_v comprehend_v and_o for_o the_o love_n i_o ought_v to_o have_v for_o truth_n by_o a_o voluntary_a acquiescence_n i_o love_v and_o adore_v divine_a providence_n which_o have_v bring_v i_o to_o the_o sight_n of_o my_o own_o nothing_o i_o acknowledge_v myself_o to_o be_v miserable_a and_o be_o please_v the_o world_n shall_v know_v it_o and_o use_v i_o according_a to_o this_o verity_n it_o be_v true_a also_o that_o we_o ought_v not_o to_o complain_v of_o whatsoever_o injury_n be_v do_v we_o by_o word_n or_o deed_n for_o it_o be_v always_o less_o than_o we_o deserve_v it_o be_v the_o law_n of_o christianity_n and_o a_o great_a truth_n that_o we_o ought_v to_o love_v abjection_n jesus_n have_v love_v it_o by_o his_o father_n order_n and_o he_o be_v the_o grand_a exemplar_n we_o must_v imitate_v it_o be_v true_a also_o that_o after_o our_o fail_n we_o ought_v to_o comfort_v ourselves_o with_o the_o love_n of_o abjection_n and_o make_v use_n of_o our_o infirmity_n to_o please_v 〈◊〉_d just_a as_o when_o a_o ship_n be_v break_v by_o a_o temâ—â—â—_n we_o get_v some_o shatter_v plank_a to_o save_v we_o 〈◊〉_d perish_v it_o be_v true_a also_o that_o since_o this_o lapse_n i_o perceâ—â—â—_n better_o than_o ever_o the_o bounty_n the_o power_n anâ—_n mercy_n of_o god_n towards_o i_o and_o all_o the_o divine_a perfection_n appear_v unto_o i_o beam_a forth_o more_o splendour_n of_o glory_n just_o as_o the_o moon_n never_o make_v more_o evident_a the_o dependence_n she_o have_v upon_o the_o sun_n than_o in_o eclipse_n it_o be_v true_a also_o that_o a_o soul_n sensible_a of_o her_o infirmity_n be_v content_a with_o her_o talon_n without_o disquiet_v herself_o to_o attain_v the_o perfection_n of_o great_a saint_n whereoâ—_n she_o acknowledge_v herself_o unworthy_a and_o if_o god_n be_v please_v to_o communicate_v unto_o her_o great_a grace_n she_o will_v not_o grow_v proud_a as_o well_o know_v she_o own_o weakness_n but_o rejoice_v in_o this_o that_o god_n thereby_o may_v be_v more_o honour_a it_o be_v true_a also_o that_o be_v convince_v of_o she_o own_o unworthiness_n she_o have_v no_o confidence_n in_o herself_o but_o in_o god_n alone_o to_o who_o entire_o she_o give_v up_o herself_o to_o deal_v with_o she_o as_o he_o please_v in_o mercy_n or_o justice_n she_o wonder_v not_o to_o see_v herself_o leave_v and_o abandon_v to_o sin_n because_o she_o know_v she_o deserve_v no_o better_a and_o then_o bless_v the_o divine_a mercy_n for_o not_o deal_v with_o her_o according_a to_o her_o merit_n it_o be_v true_a also_o that_o a_o soul_n grieve_v to_o have_v displease_v god_n will_v be_v content_a to_o be_v real_o reduce_v to_o her_o first_o nothing_o iâ—_n such_o be_v the_o divine_a pleasure_n for_o though_o she_o know_v be_v so_o bring_v to_o nothing_o she_o can_v be_v capable_a to_o please_v god_n or_o enjoy_v he_o notwithstanding_o such_o be_v the_o love_n she_o have_v for_o the_o divine_a will_n that_o she_o will_v have_v that_o do_v though_o she_o perish_v to_o acknowledge_v and_o be_v content_a with_o our_o own_o baseness_n be_v one_o of_o the_o great_a mercy_n god_n can_v do_v for_o a_o soul_n for_o hereby_o she_o draw_v salvation_n from_o perdition_n as_o god_n know_v how_o to_o advance_v his_o glory_n by_o our_o sin_n a_o soul_n thus_o enlighten_v be_v content_a to_o be_v set_v on_o the_o dunghill_n of_o her_o misery_n surround_v with_o humiliation_n for_o her_o fault_n as_o job_n be_v with_o affliction_n and_o behold_v herself_o as_o it_o be_v the_o queen_n of_o infirmity_n and_o abjection_n she_o be_v please_v therewith_o see_v she_o may_v thereby_o honour_v and_o magnify_v the_o divine_a goodness_n if_o a_o soul_n be_v miserable_a by_o fall_v into_o sin_n she_o be_v rich_a in_o possess_v the_o treasure_n of_o humiliation_n after_o her_o fail_n but_o this_o be_v a_o truth_n hide_v to_o most_o man_n who_o do_v not_o discover_v this_o advanrage_v they_o be_v poor_a and_o yet_o have_v a_o treasure_n in_o their_o field_n which_o they_o may_v have_v for_o dig_v jesus_n poor_a and_o abject_a for_o love_v of_o i_o leave_v i_o not_o to_o myself_o lift_v up_o my_o soul_n after_o her_o fall_n and_o gâ—ve_v she_o some_o of_o that_o cordial_a water_n which_o be_v call_v the_o love_n of_o abjection_n that_o chase_v away_o the_o vain_a vapour_n of_o self-love_n by_o which_o the_o soul_n be_v darken_v and_o lose_v courage_n glorify_v your_o power_n in_o my_o infirmity_n be_v please_v to_o condescend_v so_o far_o as_o to_o receive_v i_o return_v into_o the_o arm_n of_o your_o mercy_n and_o grant_v i_o may_v die_v unto_o myself_o that_o i_o may_v live_v in_o your_o embrace_n methinks_v dear_a jesus_n i_o already_o feel_v your_o tenderness_n unto_o i_o your_o divine_a love_n vouchsafe_v i_o a_o relish_n of_o the_o sweet_n of_o paradise_n my_o eye_n be_v bathe_v in_o tear_n of_o contentment_n my_o heart_n be_v dilate_v and_o love_n do_v firm_o unite_v i_o to_o you_o wherefore_o do_v you_o vouchsafe_v the_o kiss_n of_o peace_n so_o soon_o to_o such_o a_o wretch_n as_o i_o be_o why_o do_v you_o not_o leave_v i_o in_o bitterness_n of_o soul_n and_o trouble_v of_o spirit_n as_o a_o just_a chastisement_n for_o my_o sin_n your_o mercy_n will_v not_o so_o deal_v with_o i_o but_o by_o wonderful_a prevention_n of_o love_n in_o the_o midst_n of_o my_o infirmity_n you_o redouble_v your_o favour_n and_o consolation_n o_o that_o i_o be_v all_o love_n to_o serve_v you_o whole_o by_o way_n of_o gratitude_n i_o will_v have_v all_o the_o world_n to_o see_v my_o infidelity_n to_o the_o end_n your_o mercy_n may_v shine_v more_o glorious_a i_o know_v that_o the_o sight_n of_o my_o sin_n have_v so_o freeze_v my_o heart_n as_o in_o a_o manner_n to_o make_v i_o liveless_a but_o o_o my_o jesus_n you_o have_v provide_v a_o excellent_a remedy_n see_v the_o flame_n of_o divine_a love_n have_v set_v i_o all_o on_o fire_n to_o do_v your_o will_n it_o be_v a_o great_a favour_n to_o be_v in_o this_o temper_n of_o soul_n but_o dear_a jesus_n stay_v not_o here_o visit_v my_o heart_n again_o with_o the_o feeling_n of_o your_o humiliation_n that_o your_o inscrutable_a abjection_n may_v be_v its_o centre_n and_o render_v it_o in_o some_o sort_n conformable_a to_o you_o and_o do_v this_o miracle_n of_o your_o grace_n that_o this_o faithless_a heart_n may_v become_v a_o divine_a heart_n by_o the_o infinite_a merit_n of_o your_o most_o precious_a blood_n chap._n xvii_o consideration_n upon_o the_o vileness_n of_o this_o corruptible_a body_n how_o be_v a_o soul_n please_v to_o know_v that_o her_o body_n must_v return_v to_o dust_n this_o humiliation_n be_v the_o object_n of_o her_o complacency_n when_o the_o illustration_n of_o a_o divine_a light_n clear_v up_o the_o understanding_n than_o she_o know_v that_o perfection_n consist_v in_o a_o tendence_n to_o humiliation_n wherein_o she_o meet_v with_o the_o exaltation_n of_o god_n by_o the_o admirable_a contrivance_n of_o the_o divine_a wisdom_n o_o dust_n and_o ash_n you_o may_v be_v terrible_a to_o worldly_a soul_n but_o i_o be_o sure_a you_o bring_v joy_n to_o those_o who_o walk_v by_o the_o light_n of_o faith_n and_o conduct_n of_o grace_n love_v dear_o the_o interest_n of_o god_n and_o life_n eternal_a the_o loss_n of_o worldly_a interest_n honour_n contentment_n be_v painful_a to_o nature_n too_o much_o attach_v to_o herself_o but_o a_o soul_n elevate_v by_o grace_n rejoice_v at_o the_o loss_n of_o her_o own_o
interest_n to_o advance_v god_n glory_n a_o soul_n ought_v to_o be_v well-pleased_a that_o her_o body_n shall_v be_v crumble_v to_o dust_n and_o as_o it_o be_v reduce_v to_o nothing_o to_o exalt_v the_o glory_n of_o god_n and_o glorify_v his_o justice_n a_o holy_a person_n much_o wonder_v how_o the_o saint_n who_o be_v powerful_a with_o god_n keep_v their_o body_n so_o long_o entire_a not_o obtain_v that_o they_o may_v be_v humble_v by_o putrefaction_n because_o they_o know_v the_o inestimable_a value_n of_o humiliation_n which_o most_o glorify_v god_n aught_o as_o it_o seem_v to_o have_v procure_v it_o to_o their_o body_n but_o if_o god_n think_v best_a to_o glorify_v himself_o by_o preserve_v they_o from_o corruption_n his_o divine_a will_n be_v and_o must_v be_v the_o rule_n of_o their_o desire_n sometime_o i_o have_v desire_v death_n as_o amiable_a because_o it_o will_v give_v i_o free_a access_n to_o enjoy_v god_n but_o at_o present_a i_o have_v the_o spirit_n of_o annihilation_n this_o annihilation_n be_v a_o state_n above_o that_o of_o death_n and_o by_o it_o we_o offer_v a_o perfect_a sacrifice_n a_o soul_n which_o seek_v the_o glory_n of_o god_n desire_v death_n to_o enter_v into_o this_o perfect_a annihilation_n what_o be_v most_o horrible_a in_o death_n paleness_n deformity_n noisomness_n putrefaction_n please_v she_o best_o for_o these_o be_v companion_n of_o a_o perfect_a annihilation_n to_o humble_v she_o as_o much_o as_o possible_a o_o death_n how_o lovely_a be_v thou_o to_o such_o a_o soul_n it_o be_v a_o strange_a thing_n that_o the_o fire_n of_o divine_a love_n burn_v no_o bright_a in_o our_o heart_n upon_o the_o frequent_v of_o the_o sacrament_n oftentimes_o we_o exercise_v ourselves_o twice_o a_o day_n in_o mental_a prayer_n sometime_o by_o holy_a conference_n daily_a lecture_n and_o consideration_n now_o i_o think_v the_o cause_n of_o this_o be_v that_o we_o be_v sad_a deject_v with_o abjection_n which_o so_o chill_v the_o heart_n that_o the_o fire_n of_o divine_a love_n be_v stifle_v thereby_o but_o when_o once_o humiliation_n be_v a_o joy_n unto_o we_o the_o heart_n present_o become_v inflame_v my_o soul_n have_v a_o great_a degust_n of_o this_o life_n feel_v a_o wonderful_a desire_n of_o death_n she_o never_o be_v more_o sensible_a than_o now_o of_o her_o captivity_n and_o prison_n in_o this_o mortal_a body_n she_o sigh_v after_o the_o liberty_n to_o see_v god_n and_o enjoy_v he_o without_o any_o disturbance_n whatsoever_o for_o all_o create_a thing_n do_v divert_v this_o happy_a exercise_n in_o which_o consist_v her_o felicity_n be_v a_o prisoner_n in_o this_o body_n she_o be_v yet_o in_o darkness_n and_o distraction_n by_o eat_v sleep_a several_a affair_n and_o accident_n o_o how_o be_v she_o crucify_v in_o be_v deprive_v of_o the_o full_a embrace_n of_o her_o belove_a quis_fw-la i_o liberabit_fw-la de_fw-la corpore_fw-la mortis_fw-la huius_fw-la this_o make_v st._n paul_n earnest_o desire_v to_o be_v free_v from_o the_o prison_n of_o this_o mortal_a body_n i_o admire_v the_o happiness_n of_o those_o who_o die_v in_o our_o lord_n and_o do_v wonder_n at_o the_o blindness_n of_o of_o such_o who_o passionate_o desire_v this_o present_a life_n and_o be_v take_v up_o so_o much_o with_o the_o care_n of_o the_o body_n good_n employment_n which_o be_v so_o many_o impediment_n of_o our_o converse_n with_o god_n and_o christian_a perfection_n o_o how_o importunate_a be_v sensuality_n with_o we_o and_o yet_o how_o contemptible_a be_v every_o thing_n that_o be_v not_o god_n we_o ought_v not_o to_o be_v discomfort_a at_o the_o loss_n of_o temporal_a thing_n because_o thereby_o some_o chain_n of_o our_o captivity_n be_v break_v much_o less_o ought_v we_o to_o be_v trouble_v to_o see_v our_o body_n the_o prison_n of_o our_o soul_n to_o weaken_v by_o degree_n and_o threaten_v death_n take_v courage_n we_o shall_v soon_o see_v our_o desire_n accomplish_v and_o short_o we_o shall_v enjoy_v god_n in_o full_a possession_n this_o state_n of_o desire_n and_o languish_n after_o god_n be_v a_o state_n whereby_o we_o honour_v he_o as_o our_o final_a happiness_n and_o be_v so_o he_o deserve_v by_o reason_n of_o his_o excellence_n that_o we_o shall_v continual_o sigh_v after_o he_o such_o as_o have_v no_o love_n for_o their_o final_a end_n make_v no_o matter_n of_o it_o and_o give_v too_o much_o evidence_n that_o they_o find_v their_o repose_n in_o something_o else_o which_o be_v a_o most_o dreadful_a disorder_n but_o consider_v our_o happiness_n by_o death_n methinks_v i_o see_v nothing_o more_o lovely_a than_o cross_n and_o abjection_n which_o can_v only_o refresh_v a_o soul_n pant_v after_o the_o full_a possession_n of_o god_n and_o sometime_o so_o content_a with_o it_o that_o she_o forget_v the_o pain_n of_o her_o banishment_n see_v herself_o in_o a_o state_n wherein_o she_o may_v glorify_v god_n in_o so_o transcendent_a in_o a_o manner_n which_o be_v what_o she_o chief_o desire_v aspire_v to_o enjoyment_n without_o have_v regard_n to_o her_o proper_a satisfaction_n chap._n xviii_o consideration_n upon_o the_o natural_a inclination_n we_o have_v to_o evil_n a_o stone_n hold_v in_o the_o air_n if_o let_v go_v fall_v natural_o to_o the_o ground_n by_o its_o own_o weight_n and_o it_o be_v no_o more_o matter_n of_o wonder_n when_o we_o fall_v into_o imperfection_n if_o god_n leave_v we_o to_o ourselves_o we_o be_v present_o in_o our_o own_o nothing_o weakness_n and_o infirmity_n and_o if_o the_o grace_n of_o god_n be_v not_o very_o great_a unto_o we_o we_o shall_v fall_v more_o often_o they_o may_v be_v think_v valiant_a who_o bear_v up_o stout_o against_o the_o blast_n of_o strong_a temptation_n alas_o take_v we_o at_o the_o best_a we_o be_v as_o frail_a as_o glass_n on_o a_o cupboard_n if_o some_o be_v soon_o break_v it_o be_v because_o they_o be_v more_o use_v and_o find_v in_o the_o hand_n of_o a_o ill_a manager_n those_o that_o stand_v still_o on_o the_o cupboard_n if_o they_o have_v reason_n will_v not_o brag_v of_o their_o strength_n but_o only_o acknowledge_v that_o they_o have_v not_o be_v try_v by_o occasion_n when_o the_o grace_n of_o god_n keep_v we_o from_o fall_v we_o ought_v not_o to_o take_v complacence_n therein_o as_o if_o we_o be_v better_a than_o other_o by_o reason_n of_o such_o divine_a favour_n but_o our_o content_a aught_o to_o be_v in_o the_o good_a pleasure_n of_o god_n who_o be_v so_o munificent_a to_o his_o creature_n yea_o the_o most_o unworthy_a to_o be_v thus_o please_v only_o with_o god_n will_n be_v also_o very_o necessary_a when_o it_o be_v god_n pleasure_n to_o leave_v a_o soul_n to_o combat_v with_o some_o singular_a imperfection_n a_o long_a time_n without_o victory_n for_o it_o be_v the_o will_n of_o god_n to_o leave_v a_o soul_n thus_o to_o fight_v it_o out_o she_o ought_v to_o be_v as_o well_o content_a as_o if_o she_o be_v more_o elevate_v by_o grace_n see_v in_o this_o state_n she_o meet_v with_o the_o divine_a pleasure_n which_o be_v the_o object_n of_o her_o complacency_n insomuch_o that_o the_o soul_n have_v no_o more_o inclination_n for_o one_o grace_n than_o another_o but_o indifferent_a to_o all_o be_v content_a to_o have_v her_o fault_n make_v know_v to_o glorify_v god_n by_o the_o love_n of_o abjection_n secret_n fault_n do_v we_o the_o great_a hurt_n when_o manifest_v if_o we_o make_v good_a use_n of_o it_o they_o may_v bring_v no_o small_a advantage_n to_o we_o i_o have_v at_o present_a a_o wonderful_a distaste_n of_o this_o life_n which_o be_v hardly_o a_o life_n but_o a_o continual_a death_n because_o it_o deprive_v we_o of_o knowledge_n and_o and_o love_n in_o perfection_n o_o how_o this_o mortal_a life_n be_v a_o great_a punishment_n and_o full_a of_o cross_n here_o we_o sin_n here_o we_o forget_v god_n and_o run_v a_o hazard_n to_o lose_v he_o eternal_o love_v here_o find_v little_a nourishment_n be_v feed_v with_o slender_a knowledge_n sometime_o much_o cloud_v and_o continual_a propension_n to_o evil_a dear_a saviour_n when_o will_v you_o deliver_v i_o from_o the_o body_n of_o this_o death_n this_o be_v the_o desire_n of_o st._n paul_n which_o i_o take_v the_o courage_n to_o make_v be_v so_o much_o out_o of_o love_n with_o this_o miserable_a life_n the_o end_n of_o the_o first_o book_n book_n ii_o of_o the_o supernatural_a life_n which_o be_v the_o life_n of_o all_o true_a christian_n chap._n i._n the_o idea_n or_o description_n of_o the_o supernatural_a life_n we_o can_v never_o attain_v perfection_n by_o the_o sole_a conduct_n of_o human_a reason_n which_o be_v the_o light_n of_o philosopher_n faith_n be_v the_o light_n of_o christian_n which_o teach_v we_o to_o renounce_v the_o ratiocination_n of_o carnal_a prudence_n to_o follow_v in_o simplicity_n a_o jesus_n crucify_a to_o observe_v the_o commandment_n of_o god_n as_o
please_a to_o he_o and_o see_v this_o exercise_n of_o the_o supernatural_a life_n do_v bring_v with_o it_o a_o universal_a peace_n and_o this_o peace_n can_v be_v preserve_v without_o suffer_v content_o all_o injury_n whatsoever_o this_o excellent_a life_n do_v teach_v we_o holy_a patience_n now_o this_o patience_n preserve_v this_o peace_n and_o this_o peace_n bring_v with_o it_o a_o admirable_a liberty_n and_o resolution_n to_o mind_n principal_o the_o one_o thing_n necessary_a which_o be_v to_o give_v up_o ourselves_o to_o god_n and_o his_o direction_n chap._n x._o our_o great_a happiness_n on_o earth_n be_v to_o profess_v the_o way_n of_o christianity_n i_o have_v a_o great_a resentment_n of_o joy_n and_o thankfulness_n to_o see_v myself_o a_o member_n of_o christ_n church_n and_o in_o the_o number_n of_o the_o faithful_a i_o have_v a_o sensible_a taste_n of_o this_o happiness_n which_o be_v incomparable_a o_o my_o god_n what_o shall_v i_o return_v unto_o you_o for_o have_v prevent_v i_o with_o this_o signal_n mercy_n why_o have_v you_o choose_v i_o out_o among_o so_o many_o thousand_o alas_o this_o be_v the_o excess_n of_o your_o sole_a bounty_n to_o i_o to_o be_v a_o child_n of_o the_o church_n o_o what_o a_o happiness_n be_v this_o it_o be_v of_o more_o worth_n than_o to_o be_v monarch_n of_o the_o whole_a world_n the_o church_n be_v the_o congregation_n of_o the_o faithful_a that_o be_v of_o those_o who_o believe_v and_o confess_v jesus_n christ_n and_o have_v no_o other_o maxim_n nor_o sentiment_n than_o he_o o_o my_o soul_n let_v we_o then_o live_v as_o become_v our_o profession_n that_o jesusmay_v live_v in_o we_o according_a to_o his_o holy_a will_n and_o inclination_n to_o be_v a_o member_n of_o christ_n church_n be_v to_o be_v a_o person_n who_o ought_v to_o have_v a_o affection_n for_o humiliation_n and_o cross_n to_o be_v well_o content_v not_o to_o thrive_v in_o the_o world_n and_o to_o advance_v in_o virtue_n by_o opprobrious_a usage_n and_o contradiction_n what_o a_o misery_n be_v it_o to_o see_v we_o live_v so_o little_a in_o the_o exercise_n of_o christianity_n we_o account_v it_o a_o honour_n to_o be_v in_o authority_n to_o be_v well_o descend_v to_o have_v a_o generous_a spirit_n but_o to_o be_v a_o christian_n we_o be_v afraid_a to_o own_v it_o by_o our_o action_n o_o the_o beauty_n that_o adorn_v our_o christian_a profession_n how_o wonderful_a be_v it_o and_o yet_o how_o little_o esteem_v by_o we_o i_o shall_v be_v very_o honourable_a and_o happy_a to_o keep_v that_o with_o i_o when_o other_o thing_n be_v go_v and_o vanish_v o_o how_o amiable_a be_v the_o maxim_n of_o a_o supernatural_a life_n in_o what_o a_o excellent_a order_n do_v they_o put_v all_o thing_n they_o give_v to_o every_o one_o what_o be_v their_o due_n to_o god_n all_o honour_n and_o glory_n and_o to_o i_o a_o wretched_a sinner_n contempt_n and_o confusion_n for_o i_o ought_v to_o consider_v myself_o as_o a_o centre_n of_o all_o misery_n and_o deserve_a punishment_n god_n be_v the_o centre_n and_o object_n of_o all_o the_o adoration_n of_o man_n and_o angel_n glory_n be_v his_o just_a tribute_n but_o to_o i_o belong_v confusion_n if_o i_o shall_v be_v beat_v disgraceful_o i_o ought_v to_o take_v it_o with_o contentation_n to_o see_v justice_n so_o well_o do_v to_o i_o on_o this_o occasion_n and_o if_o i_o be_v true_o animate_v with_o the_o spirit_n of_o christianity_n i_o ought_v as_o much_o desire_n to_o be_v humble_v as_o worlding_n thirst_v after_o honour_n praise_n and_o preferment_n it_o be_v a_o supernatural_a disorder_n not_o to_o love_v ignominy_n and_o not_o to_o endeavour_v the_o destruction_n of_o our_o corrupt_a nature_n jesus_n have_v build_v his_o mystical_a body_n on_o the_o ruin_n of_o our_o natural_a body_n and_o we_o can_v form_v in_o we_o the_o same_o life_n of_o jesus_n without_o the_o ruin_n of_o we_o that_o be_v to_o say_v our_o natural_a life_n according_a to_o our_o deprave_a inclination_n poverty_n pain_n contempt_n your_o dear_a companion_n good_a jesus_n make_v sometime_o my_o heart_n ache_v and_o then_o again_o they_o refresh_v i_o breathe_v forth_o such_o sweet_a perfume_n as_o cheer_v my_o spirit_n a_o perfume_n that_o purify_v and_o calm_v my_o soul_n into_o a_o fit_a temper_n to_o converse_v with_o you_o i_o will_v now_o wonder_v no_o more_o that_o your_o spouse_n run_v after_o you_o in_o the_o odour_n of_o your_o perfume_n a_o perfume_n that_o do_v strengthen_v i_o to_o accomplish_v the_o desire_n i_o have_v to_o be_v conformable_a to_o you_o my_o heart_n dilate_v itself_o with_o hope_n to_o see_v that_o happy_a day_n in_o this_o life_n when_o i_o shall_v be_v free_a from_o all_o molestation_n of_o creature_n and_o have_v some_o participation_n of_o the_o poverty_n and_o abjection_n of_o jesus_n crucify_v we_o can_v live_v here_o without_o some_o director_n or_o other_o for_o either_o the_o humanity_n of_o jesus_n will_v direct_v we_o or_o the_o humanity_n of_o adam_n will_v govern_v we_o if_o we_o live_v the_o life_n of_o christianity_n the_o first_o will_v conduct_v we_o and_o impart_v to_o we_o such_o direction_n as_o his_o holy_a soul_n receive_v from_o the_o divinity_n which_o be_v all_o for_o the_o cross_n and_o humiliation_n if_o we_o love_v only_o a_o human_a life_n the_o other_o will_v guide_v we_o in_o the_o way_n of_o self-love_n it_o be_v as_o great_a a_o miracle_n for_o a_o soul_n to_o live_v a_o supernatural_a life_n as_o for_o a_o stone_n to_o elevate_v itself_o into_o the_o air_n because_o the_o corruption_n of_o sin_n have_v make_v the_o soul_n so_o heavy_a that_o of_o herself_o she_o can_v but_o tend_v downward_o to_o sin_n and_o misery_n this_o be_v that_o which_o magnify_v the_o power_n of_o grace_n in_o we_o so_o that_o it_o be_v a_o prodigious_a vanity_n to_o boast_v of_o our_o good_a action_n when_o be_v do_v by_o the_o supernatural_a power_n of_o grace_n they_o be_v not_o the_o fruit_n of_o human_a nature_n if_o a_o soul_n lose_v the_o sight_n of_o the_o light_n of_o faith_n she_o will_v soon_o lose_v herself_o in_o the_o mist_n of_o self-love_n if_o she_o do_v not_o live_v in_o a_o continual_a mortification_n by_o curb_v her_o natural_a appetite_n she_o must_v needs_o fall_v into_o superfluity_n and_o imperfection_n the_o sweetness_n and_o joy_n that_o a_o soul_n receive_v from_o austerity_n cross_n poverty_n denudation_n of_o creature_n make_v her_o spiritual_a peaceful_a cheerful_a and_o afford_v her_o solid_a content_n and_o satisfaction_n the_o content_a and_o delight_n she_o receive_v from_o sensual_a pleasure_n though_o lawful_a as_o meat_n and_o drink_n temporal_a success_n reputation_n etc._n etc._n make_v she_o carnal_a and_o afford_v she_o but_o a_o false_a peace_n and_o vain_a joy_n and_o instead_o of_o elevate_a she_o to_o contemplation_n do_v more_o or_o less_o depress_v she_o to_o sensuality_n chap._n xi_o that_o truth_n be_v only_o find_v in_o the_o spirit_n of_o christianity_n the_o rest_n be_v vanity_n when_o the_o beam_n of_o the_o light_n of_o faith_n be_v dart_v into_o a_o soul_n they_o discover_v to_o she_o that_o there_o be_v nothing_o true_a indeed_o but_o the_o verity_n of_o christianity_n which_o jesus_n come_v from_o heaven_n to_o teach_v we_o and_o all_o the_o rest_n but_o deceit_n and_o vanity_n o_o what_o happiness_n be_v it_o for_o a_o soul_n to_o be_v thus_o irradiate_v then_o she_o begin_v to_o know_v how_o she_o have_v be_v envelop_v with_o darkness_n and_o dwell_v in_o obscurity_n o_o what_o joy_n do_v now_o refresh_v she_o how_o rich_a and_o glorious_a be_v she_o in_o perceive_v that_o what_o she_o think_v to_o be_v true_a riches_n glory_n and_o joy_n be_v false_a and_o counterfeit_a and_o in_o reality_n but_o poverty_n infamy_n and_o sorrow_n these_o heavenly_a illustration_n do_v open_a her_o eye_n to_o see_v perfect_o the_o vanity_n of_o this_o world_n which_o now_o she_o value_v not_o but_o jesus_n be_v her_o only_a joy_n her_o life_n and_o verity_n whatsoever_o be_v not_o christian_n that_o be_v to_o say_v according_a to_o the_o maxim_n of_o christianity_n she_o esteem_v now_o as_o folly_n death_n and_o perdition_n and_o what_o to_o the_o world_n and_o the_o flesh_n be_v folly_n death_n and_o perdition_n she_o account_v to_o be_v wisdom_n life_n and_o the_o great_a gain_n o_o when_o the_o ray_n of_o this_o light_n do_v pierce_v a_o soul_n how_o on_o a_o sudden_a become_v she_o know_v content_a and_o elevate_v it_o be_v hardly_o credible_a how_o much_o such_o a_o soul_n be_v alienate_v from_o herself_o and_o whatsoever_o be_v not_o god_n she_o see_v so_o much_o wisdom_n in_o the_o folly_n of_o saint_n and_o so_o much_o beauty_n in_o their_o misery_n that_o all_o the_o allurement_n of_o the_o world_n can_v win_v her_o affection_n for_o have_v be_v take_v
refuse_v the_o most_o charm_a and_o most_o tender_a embrace_n to_o the_o most_o unworthy_a and_o most_o perfidious_a of_o all_o his_o enemy_n judas_n who_o envy_n have_v already_o poison_v even_o to_o the_o heart_n who_o avarice_n have_v pervert_v and_o make_v a_o thief_n insensibleness_n have_v blind_v and_o make_v ungrateful_a who_o malice_n have_v corrupt_v and_o make_v a_o apostate_n a_o traitor_n a_o very_a devil_n yet_o this_o judas_n in_o this_o condition_n that_o he_o be_v and_o in_o which_o jesus_n see_v he_o at_o the_o bottom_n of_o his_o heart_n be_v not_o exclude_v from_o the_o eminent_a grandeurs_fw-fr of_o the_o love_n of_o our_o saviour_n which_o feed_v this_o daemon_n with_o the_o manna_n of_o angel_n o_o love_n how_o thou_o be_v admirable_a o_o love_n how_o thou_o be_v invincible_a a_o abundance_n of_o water_n can_v extinguish_v thy_o flame_n and_o now_o my_o soul_n be_v it_o possible_a thou_o shall_v continue_v tepid_a and_o insensible_a while_o thou_o be_v near_o so_o great_a a_o fire_n have_v thou_o all_o the_o ardour_n of_o the_o seraphin_n thou_o will_v still_o be_v too_o little_a on_o fire_n to_o answer_v and_o reflect_v the_o fire_n of_o that_o incomparable_a love_n which_o inflame_v his_o heart_n when_o he_o come_v to_o give_v himself_o to_o thou_o a_o good_a religious_a capuchin_n call_v br._n bonaventure_n feel_v his_o soul_n so_o inflame_v with_o this_o sacred_a fire_n when_o he_o approach_v to_o the_o holy_a table_n that_o one_o day_n among_o other_o find_v himself_o more_o than_o ordinary_a replenish_v with_o a_o ardent_a desire_n to_o unite_v himself_o with_o god_n and_o see_v the_o most_o bless_a sacrament_n in_o the_o priest_n hand_n ready_a to_o communicate_v he_o his_o heart_n seem_v to_o make_v strong_a effort_n to_o leap_v out_o of_o his_o breast_n and_o meet_v the_o only_a object_n of_o its_o desire_n which_o also_o break_v forth_o into_o word_n for_o the_o abundance_n of_o his_o love_n force_v out_o their_o amorous_a aspiration_n my_o jesus_n my_o jesus_n my_o jesus_n but_o to_o let_v both_o he_o and_o we_o know_v that_o the_o love_n of_o jesus_n in_o this_o unspeakable_a mystery_n surpass_v all_o we_o in_o a_o infinite_a measure_n the_o holy_a host_n quit_v the_o priest_n hand_n and_o as_o it_o be_v all_o on_o a_o flame_n and_o encircle_v with_o glorious_a ray_n of_o light_n of_o its_o own_o accord_n fly_v into_o the_o mouth_n of_o this_o worthy_a servant_n of_o god_n chap._n iu._n interiour_n entertainment_n during_o communion_n some_o time_n when_o i_o be_v communicate_v it_o come_v into_o my_o mind_n to_o think_v that_o my_o heart_n be_v a_o altar_n and_o that_o jesus_n christ_n come_v to_o continue_v upon_o it_o the_o same_o operation_n that_o he_o have_v perform_v on_o that_o altar_n where_o the_o holy_a mass_n be_v celebrate_v wherefore_o my_o heart_n receive_v he_o love_o and_o simple_o unite_v itself_o to_o all_o his_o divine_a operation_n relate_v both_o to_o his_o heavenly_a father_n and_o to_o creature_n and_o my_o soul_n adhere_v to_o all_o his_o adoration_n all_o his_o sacrifice_n all_o his_o love_n that_o he_o bear_v his_o eternal_a father_n become_v whole_o passive_a like_o a_o altar_n upon_o which_o jesus_n do_v all_o that_o he_o please_v as_o well_o in_o regard_n of_o the_o divinity_n as_o in_o regard_n of_o man_n to_o who_o he_o distribute_v and_o dispense_v his_o mercy_n it_o seem_v to_o i_o that_o in_o the_o first_o place_n he_o apply_v himself_o to_o honour_v his_o divine_a father_n to_o annihilate_v himself_o before_o his_o greatness_n to_o love_v his_o goodness_n and_o other_o divine_a perfection_n and_o then_o he_o turn_v himself_o to_o succour_v my_o weakness_n and_o show_v his_o mercy_n upon_o i_o by_o give_v i_o a_o glimpse_n of_o what_o he_o be_v and_o a_o fight_n of_o the_o strict_a and_o close_a alliance_n whereby_o i_o ought_v to_o be_v unite_v to_o he_o that_o i_o ought_v not_o to_o subsist_v a_o moment_n but_o by_o his_o life_n that_o his_o holy_a spirit_n ought_v to_o animate_v my_o soul_n and_o be_v the_o first_o spring_n of_o all_o its_o motion_n as_o my_o soul_n move_v my_o body_n and_o be_v the_o principal_a of_o all_o its_o operation_n that_o to_o live_v a_o life_n pure_o humane_a be_v a_o state_n wherein_o though_o a_o soul_n do_v not_o offend_v god_n yet_o she_o can_v please_v he_o which_o be_v a_o thing_n love_n can_v suffer_v nor_o will_v it_o endure_v that_o a_o soul_n wherein_o it_o reign_v shall_v cease_v any_o one_o moment_n from_o please_v she_o belove_v o_o jesus_n enter_v into_o so_o absolute_a a_o possession_n of_o my_o soul_n that_o she_o may_v be_v whole_o you_o and_o that_o she_o may_v never_o have_v any_o other_o motion_n than_o what_o your_o grace_n give_v she_o it_o be_v the_o great_a desire_n of_o my_o soul_n which_o will_v not_o live_v to_o you_o partly_o and_o partly_o to_o creature_n but_o that_o all_o the_o action_n of_o my_o life_n be_v consecrate_a to_o your_o love_n i_o have_v need_n of_o a_o powerful_a grace_n o_o jesus_n to_o continue_v thus_o elevate_v above_o myself_o in_o all_o sort_n of_o occasion_n but_o vouchsafe_v to_o magnify_v your_o omnipotence_n in_o my_o weakness_n your_o mercy_n in_o my_o misery_n another_o time_n after_o communion_n i_o have_v represent_v to_o i_o the_o manner_n how_o all_o the_o interiour_n faculty_n of_o jesus_n christ_n in_o his_o mortal_a life_n do_v most_o worthy_o glorify_v his_o eternal_a father_n all_o the_o part_n of_o his_o holy_a soul_n be_v take_v up_o in_o this_o employment_n the_o intellectual_a power_n of_o the_o superior_a part_n the_o beatifical_a vision_n and_o fruition_n the_o inferior_a part_n and_o his_o body_n by_o a_o most_o perfect_a suffer_v i_o see_v the_o admirable_a connexion_n which_o be_v between_o these_o so_o different_a state_n and_o their_o joint_a accord_n to_o glorify_v the_o eternal_a father_n and_o the_o wonderful_a oeconomy_n of_o this_o sacred_a interiour_n charm_v my_o soul_n i_o continual_o offer_v it_o up_o to_o god_n in_o the_o pressure_n i_o lay_v under_o in_o the_o midst_n of_o my_o trouble_n i_o enter_v into_o these_o holy_a disposition_n and_o unite_v my_o sufferig_n with_o he_o my_o action_n with_o his_o divine_a one_o this_o disposition_n remain_v deep_o imprint_v in_o i_o and_o serve_v i_o for_o a_o comfort_n and_o support_v upon_o all_o occasion_n of_o our_o contempt_n pain_n or_o any_o other_o affliction_n another_o time_n my_o interiour_n entertainment_n during_o communion_n be_v after_o this_o manner_n i_o consider_v that_o a_o christian_n have_v but_o two_o concern_v in_o this_o life_n how_o to_o maintain_v the_o life_n of_o nature_n and_o that_o of_o grace_n thereby_o to_o arrive_v to_o that_o of_o glory_n general_o man_n think_v of_o nothing_o but_o the_o first_o though_o it_o be_v of_o no_o consequence_n and_o but_o for_o a_o moment_n beside_o that_o be_v full_a of_o misery_n and_o they_o forget_v the_o second_o which_o be_v eternal_a and_o infinite_a importance_n yet_o scarce_o any_o body_n mind_v it_o for_o every_o one_o life_n in_o the_o darkness_n of_o imperfection_n and_o the_o blindness_n of_o sense_n o_o what_o a_o misery_n and_o on_o the_o contrary_a how_o happy_a be_v they_o who_o set_v no_o value_n but_o upon_o the_o life_n of_o grace_n and_o consequent_o love_v those_o exercise_n which_o nourish_v and_o improve_v it_o as_o mortification_n prayer_n frequent_a communion_n o_o how_o clear_o do_v i_o see_v that_o i_o ought_v to_o disengage_v myself_o from_o temporal_a affair_n to_o apply_v myself_o more_o full_o to_o the_o exercise_n of_o the_o life_n of_o grace_n and_o to_o pure_a prayer_n i_o make_v another_o time_n my_o action_n of_o grace_n after_o this_o manner_n a_o attention_n to_o the_o presence_n of_o god_n before_o communion_n have_v raise_v in_o i_o a_o great_a and_o awful_a respect_n towards_o that_o most_o sacred_a majesty_n before_o who_o the_o high_a seraphin_n in_o heaven_n do_v tremble_v the_o like_a impression_n continue_v in_o i_o also_o after_o communion_n my_o soul_n be_v all_o adoration_n see_v the_o adorable_a jesus_n be_v become_v her_o guest_n his_o presence_n heighten_v my_o respect_n as_o be_v the_o source_n of_o all_o grace_n and_o of_o all_o good_a disposition_n i_o see_v himself_o also_o sometime_o pay_v a_o profound_a respect_n to_o god_n the_o father_n and_o then_o i_o plunge_v myself_o deep_a and_o even_o lose_v myself_o in_o those_o divine_a respect_n unwilling_a to_o come_v out_o of_o they_o and_o fear_v lest_o some_o person_n shall_v come_v to_o visit_v i_o and_o interrupt_v my_o devotion_n i_o hide_v myself_o that_o i_o may_v remain_v thus_o whole_o plunge_v in_o this_o sentiment_n of_o reverence_n which_o perfume_a my_o soul_n chap._n v._o other_o interiour_n entertainment_n to_o give_v thanks_o after_o communion_n the_o disposition_n most_o frequent_a
elevate_v his_o heart_n by_o frequent_a prayer_n to_o god_n and_o contemplation_n of_o his_o divine_a perfection_n or_o that_o dissipate_v his_o spirit_n abroad_o by_o the_o impulse_n of_o nature_n engage_v himself_o in_o temporal_a affair_n without_o be_v call_v thereto_o by_o the_o inspiration_n and_o guidance_n of_o grace_n though_o something_o of_o zeal_n appear_v in_o the_o thing_n and_o as_o one_o think_v a_o good_a intention_n i_o say_v this_o interiour_n fire_n in_o such_o a_o person_n be_v to_o be_v compare_v to_o these_o meteor_n or_o lambent_a fire_n which_o be_v carry_v about_o with_o every_o motion_n of_o the_o air_n and_o shine_v but_o do_v not_o burn_v chap._n xii_o the_o five_o effect_n of_o communion_n be_v to_o give_v strength_n and_o perseverance_n in_o the_o service_n of_o god_n one_o day_n as_o i_o enter_v into_o a_o church_n i_o hear_v they_o sing_v these_o word_n in_o honour_n of_o the_o bless_a sacrament_n ambulavit_fw-la in_o fortitudine_fw-la cibi_fw-la illius_fw-la usque_fw-la ad_fw-la montem_fw-la dei_fw-la he_o walk_v in_o the_o strength_n of_o this_o bread_n even_o to_o the_o mount_n of_o god_n these_o word_n affect_v i_o and_o make_v i_o hope_n that_o notwithstanding_o my_o misery_n and_o continual_a weakness_n i_o may_v be_v so_o strengthen_v by_o receive_v this_o divine_a bread_n that_o at_o last_o i_o may_v arrive_v to_o the_o mount_n of_o god_n may_v raise_v myself_o above_o the_o low_a inclination_n of_o nature_n and_o mount_v to_o the_o participation_n of_o the_o spirit_n of_o jesus_n and_o perfection_n of_o a_o supernatural_a life_n which_o life_n be_v a_o high_a mountain_n which_o no_o body_n can_v climb_v by_o the_o mere_a strength_n of_o nature_n i_o observe_v before_o that_o the_o peculiar_a intention_n of_o jesus_n in_o institute_v the_o holy_a sacrament_n be_v to_o give_v we_o a_o foundation_n to_o life_n and_o strength_n and_o for_o that_o reason_n it_o be_v the_o only_a sacrament_n that_o be_v give_v in_o the_o form_n of_o nourishment_n the_o rest_n be_v prescribe_v by_o way_n of_o remedy_n to_o purge_v the_o soul_n from_o sin_n or_o confer_v by_o ceremony_n of_o cousecration_n to_o dedicate_v the_o person_n to_o the_o peculiar_a duty_n of_o religion_n and_o holy_a thing_n and_o so_o other_o respective_o but_o this_o be_v the_o only_a one_o give_v by_o way_n of_o heavenly_a nurture_n to_o enable_v we_o to_o live_v by_o the_o life_n of_o grace_n a_o perpetual_a life_n over_o which_o the_o death_n of_o sin_n have_v no_o power_n for_o jesus_n christ_n among_o other_o effect_n of_o this_o divine_a food_n assure_v we_o that_o it_o bestow_v eternal_a life_n qui_fw-la manducat_fw-la hunc_fw-la panem_fw-la vivet_fw-la in_o aeternum_fw-la and_o it_o seem_v very_o reasonable_a and_o conform_a to_o the_o infinite_a goodness_n of_o god_n that_o the_o most_o excellent_a of_o sacrament_n shall_v confer_v the_o most_o excellent_a of_o grace_n which_o be_v that_o of_o perseverance_n a_o grace_n so_o sublime_a so_o divine_a so_o precious_a that_o we_o can_v merit_v it_o by_o any_o or_o all_o the_o good_a action_n we_o can_v do_v but_o how_o rare_a and_o how_o noble_a soever_o it_o be_v we_o have_v much_o subject_n to_o hope_n that_o the_o father_n of_o mercy_n and_o god_n of_o all_o consolation_n will_v grant_v we_o it_o since_o he_o have_v already_o enrich_v we_o with_o that_o which_o be_v infinite_o more_o than_o this_o grace_n the_o prefence_n of_o his_o only_a son_n in_o the_o bless_a sacrament_n corporal_a nutriment_n be_v elementary_a and_o material_a and_o therefore_o no_o better_o than_o corruption_n yet_o if_o the_o body_n can_v take_v it_o always_o in_o a_o just_a proportion_n and_o be_v perfect_o well_o dispose_v to_o draw_v the_o strength_n it_o afford_v it_o will_v continue_v our_o natural_a life_n and_o we_o shall_v never_o die_v how_o much_o more_o will_v the_o heavenly_a bread_n the_o live_a bread_n which_o contain_v in_o itself_o the_o everflowing_a source_n of_o life_n confer_v a_o perpetuity_n and_o infectibility_n of_o spiritual_a life_n by_o grace_n if_o the_o soul_n due_o use_v and_o be_v dispose_v to_o receive_v the_o abundance_n of_o grace_n virtue_n and_o supernatural_a strength_n that_o this_o adorable_a food_n bring_v with_o it_o when_o we_o communicate_v we_o drink_v of_o the_o same_o fountain_n the_o bless_a do_v in_o heaven_n but_o to_o they_o it_o be_v the_o water_n of_o life_n everlasting_a and_o what_o else_o can_v it_o be_v to_o we_o but_o that_o of_o the_o life_n of_o never_o fail_a grace_n which_o be_v the_o pledge_n and_o assurance_n of_o the_o eternity_n of_o glory_n o_o my_o soul_n do_v thou_o think_v that_o any_o of_o the_o bless_a in_o heaven_n after_o they_o have_v taste_v the_o delight_n of_o that_o torrent_n of_o pleasure_n can_v be_v oloy_v with_o they_o or_o be_v content_v to_o be_v deprive_v of_o that_o divine_a and_o happy_a life_n how_o then_o can_v thou_o be_v so_o unconstant_a and_o irresolute_a in_o the_o way_n of_o grace_n and_o unfaithful_a in_o the_o union_n thou_o have_v contract_v with_o god_n who_o haste_n drink_v the_o water_n of_o joy_n from_o the_o same_o fountain_n of_o thy_o saviour_n when_o he_o present_v himself_o real_o and_o in_o person_n and_o demand_n to_o be_v admit_v into_o thy_o heart_n say_v not_o to_o he_o as_o st._n peter_n do_v retire_v from_o i_o o_o lord_n but_o breath_n out_o the_o sentiment_n of_o perfect_a love_n say_v with_o the_o spouse_n tenui_fw-la eum_fw-la nec_fw-la dimittam_fw-la i_o will_v never_o abandon_v he_o o_o what_o a_o pleasant_a society_n how_o profound_a a_o peace_n do_v the_o enjoyment_n of_o the_o sovereign_n good_a bring_v to_o the_o soul_n but_o both_o imperfect_a till_o they_o be_v finish_v in_o heaven_n the_o full_a possession_n thereof_o she_o can_v acquire_v on_o earth_n serve_v only_o to_o inflame_v her_o thirst_n more_o the_o more_o she_o taste_v god_n the_o more_o she_o desire_v he_o and_o since_o there_o be_v no_o possibility_n of_o satisfy_v her_o desire_n in_o this_o life_n she_o suffer_v a_o continual_a martyrdom_n that_o make_v she_o both_o die_v and_o live_v together_o her_o pain_n be_v full_a of_o sweetness_n and_o that_o sweetness_n beget_v a_o languish_a and_o long_v after_o her_o belove_a she_o be_v disgu_v with_o all_o create_a thing_n and_o forcible_o draw_v off_o from_o they_o nothing_o please_v she_o in_o this_o condition_n but_o that_o which_o augment_v her_o flame_n she_o can_v read_v with_o satisfaction_n unless_o there_o be_v some_o mention_n of_o her_o belove_a all_o conversation_n and_o discourse_n be_v burden_n some_o and_o tedious_a unless_o the_o subject_n be_v his_o love_n my_o god_n you_o see_v the_o bottom_n of_o my_o heart_n i_o conceive_v thing_n that_o i_o can_v utter_v it_o be_v true_a i_o suffer_v but_o i_o will_v not_o but_o suffer_v i_o can_v do_v nothing_o but_o aspire_v to_o a_o full_a possession_n of_o your_o infinite_a goodness_n it_o be_v very_o much_o that_o you_o vouchsafe_v to_o give_v yourself_o unto_o i_o in_o the_o adorable_a sacrament_n with_o such_o a_o immense_a love_n but_o still_o you_o give_v i_o only_o a_o hide_a treasure_n i_o possess_v you_o indeed_o but_o do_v not_o enjoy_v you_o to_o my_o heart_n desire_v i_o be_o in_o the_o condition_n of_o holy_a simeon_n who_o hold_v you_o in_o his_o arm_n in_o the_o temple_n and_o yet_o dye_v with_o a_o desire_n to_o see_v you_o it_o be_v time_n o_o lord_n now_o permit_v my_o soul_n to_o depart_v in_o peace_n and_o quit_v this_o mortal_a life_n because_o i_o receive_v within_o i_o the_o spring_n and_o source_n of_o immortality_n i_o know_v for_o certain_a that_o in_o paradise_n i_o shall_v obtain_v the_o perfect_a accomplishment_n of_o all_o my_o desire_n yet_o i_o do_v not_o desire_v it_o till_o it_o be_v your_o good_a will_n and_o pleasure_n your_o love_n make_v i_o press_v forward_o and_o tend_v incessant_o to_o the_o beatifical_a union_n but_o it_o be_v your_o love_n too_o that_o stop_v my_o course_n that_o draw_v i_o back_o inspire_v i_o with_o the_o high_a indifference_n and_o absolute_a dependence_n on_o your_o divine_a will._n o_o jesus_n how_o admirable_a be_v your_o providence_n you_o open_a my_o eye_n to_o see_v the_o comfortable_a and_o bless_a sight_n of_o the_o power_n and_o purity_n of_o love_n which_o ought_v to_o possess_v the_o soul_n that_o have_v the_o happiness_n to_o receive_v you_o often_o in_o the_o holy_a communion_n i_o relinquish_v and_o resign_v myself_o more_o than_o ever_o into_o your_o divine_a hand_n guide_v i_o as_o it_o shall_v best_o please_v you_o there_o be_v nothing_o leave_v to_o ask_v you_o more_o since_o you_o have_v unasked_a bestow_v yourself_o upon_o i_o and_o crown_v i_o with_o mercy_n even_o beyond_o all_o my_o hope_n my_o business_n be_v to_o remain_v annihilate_v in_o your_o presence_n and_o quiet_o receive_v your_o divine_a
true_a these_o be_v cross_n and_o cruel_a persecution_n but_o if_o we_o bear_v they_o faithful_o with_o love_n it_o be_v a_o martyrdom_n please_v to_o god_n and_o profitable_a to_o we_o the_o persecute_v tyrant_n tempt_v the_o primitive_a christian_n sometime_o against_o their_o faith_n sometime_o against_o their_o chastity_n which_o be_v glorious_a trial_n of_o their_o fidelity_n o_o how_o bless_v a_o thing_n be_v it_o to_o fight_v for_o that_o faith_n and_o fidelity_n we_o owe_v to_o god_n o_o what_o lovely_a charm_n be_v there_o in_o this_o martyrdom_n to_o those_o who_o behold_v they_o with_o the_o eye_n of_o faith_n chap._n v._o of_o exterior_a cross_n by_o the_o loss_n of_o good_n be_v in_o a_o friend_n house_n who_o serve_v god_n true_o news_n be_v bring_v i_o that_o the_o soldier_n have_v cease_v upon_o all_o my_o good_n at_o home_o and_o bless_v be_v god_n it_o little_o trouble_v i_o but_o rather_o i_o rejoice_v and_o put_v myself_o into_o the_o hand_n of_o god_n to_o do_v what_o he_o please_v with_o i_o prepare_v my_o heart_n to_o undergo_v great_a loss_n content_o i_o be_v much_o comfort_v by_o my_o friend_n and_o i_o go_v home_o full_a of_o joy_n and_o cheerfulness_n account_v myself_o happy_a that_o divine_a providence_n have_v bring_v i_o to_o poverty_n and_o abjection_n and_o i_o say_v with_o myself_o courage_n my_o soul_n our_o bless_a saviour_n continue_v his_o mercy_n poverty_n and_o abjection_n will_v afford_v we_o wing_n to_o flee_v to_o perfection_n behold_v now_o be_v the_o opportunity_n to_o make_v great_a progress_n in_o virtue_n if_o we_o be_v but_o faithful_a it_o seem_v to_o i_o that_o at_o this_o time_n few_o person_n pity_v i_o and_o yet_o they_o talk_v of_o my_o affliction_n as_o no_o ordinary_a trial_n they_o blame_v i_o in_o some_o sort_n of_o proceed_n and_o after_o all_o i_o find_v myself_o a_o abject_a and_o little_a consider_v i_o can_v never_o consent_v to_o the_o council_n of_o those_o who_o will_v have_v i_o either_o yield_v to_o anger_n or_o discontent_n for_o i_o always_o think_v i_o ought_v not_o to_o part_v with_o that_o meekness_n and_o humility_n which_o become_v a_o christian_n for_o the_o great_a temporal_a loss_n that_o can_v happen_v to_o i_o i_o consider_v with_o myself_o that_o these_o little_a cross_n be_v hardly_o to_o be_v name_v with_o those_o that_o they_o suffer_v who_o be_v torment_v with_o anguish_n of_o spirit_n or_o those_o who_o be_v slave_n under_o the_o turk_n or_o such_o who_o be_v put_v to_o death_n with_o grievous_a torture_n that_o which_o i_o suffer_v be_v nothing_o in_o comparison_n of_o those_o poor_a creature_n for_o i_o instead_o of_o be_v contristate_v by_o suffer_v find_v a_o certain_a joy_n to_o possess_v my_o heart_n and_o a_o great_a desire_n to_o suffer_v more_o hereupon_o one_o tell_v i_o that_o our_o saviour_n send_v i_o cross_v adorn_v with_o flower_n which_o though_o they_o take_v not_o away_o their_o heaviness_n yet_o their_o odour_n do_v refresh_v and_o strengthen_v i_o to_o bear_v they_o this_o persecution_n continue_v i_o find_v myself_o always_o dispose_v to_o suffer_v it_o with_o great_a interiour_n peace_n and_o i_o keep_v my_o soul_n from_o harbour_v any_o thought_n of_o bitterness_n against_o those_o who_o assist_v my_o plunderer_n i_o salute_v they_o with_o a_o cordial_a love_n although_o nature_n have_v a_o repugnance_n to_o their_o proceed_n i_o behold_v with_o contentment_n the_o fall_n of_o our_o family_n how_o our_o friend_n do_v forsake_v we_o and_o some_o treat_v we_o very_o unworthy_o and_o yet_o i_o can_v not_o think_v it_o a_o misfortune_n but_o a_o signal_n favour_n from_o the_o hand_n of_o providence_n and_o i_o do_v not_o complain_v but_o digest_v all_o this_o bitter_a cup_n with_o interiour_n joy_n o_o bona_fw-la crux_fw-la o_o good_a cross_n the_o word_n of_o st._n andrew_n seem_v to_o i_o very_o true_a o_o how_o cross_n be_v good_a though_o full_a of_o bitterness_n we_o ought_v to_o love_v what_o be_v good_a and_o make_v much_o of_o it_o in_o reality_n there_o be_v a_o exquisite_a goodness_n in_o suffering_n and_o the_o fruit_n of_o the_o cross_n be_v wonderful_a savorous_a for_o at_o last_o we_o shall_v find_v that_o the_o degree_n of_o glory_n shall_v be_v according_a to_o the_o measure_n of_o our_o suffering_n and_o degree_n of_o love_n i_o be_v then_o tell_v some_o mean_n how_o to_o get_v out_o of_o this_o suffer_a condition_n nature_n begin_v to_o resent_v this_o with_o some_o joy_n but_o grace_n repress_v it_o stifle_v this_o emotion_n of_o nature_n that_o i_o may_v have_v no_o joy_n but_o in_o god_n alone_o and_o in_o the_o accomplishment_n of_o his_o good_a pleasure_n chap._n vi_o disposition_n during_o sickness_n where_o the_o body_n suffer_v and_o the_o soul_n rejoice_v god_n have_v be_v please_v to_o make_v i_o enjoy_v during_o my_o sickness_n a_o interiour_n peace_n so_o profound_a and_o great_a that_o i_o be_v altogether_o astonish_v at_o it_o consider_v my_o misery_n and_o former_a transgression_n i_o say_v within_o myself_o what_o be_v this_o that_o i_o find_v within_o i_o how_o come_v it_o to_o pass_v that_o so_o miserable_a a_o creature_n shall_v be_v thus_o content_a and_o satisfy_v for_o my_o soul_n be_v in_o a_o perfect_a calm_a from_o all_o her_o passion_n feel_v nothing_o but_o a_o pure_a and_o total_a union_n to_o the_o good_a pleasure_n of_o god_n and_o a_o absolute_a abandon_v of_o myself_o to_o the_o conduct_n of_o divine_a love_n it_o seem_v to_o i_o that_o some_o day_n before_o this_o sickness_n i_o be_v in_o a_o disposition_n of_o extraordinary_a peace_n and_o tranquillity_n and_o one_o day_n after_o dinner_n i_o be_v take_v with_o a_o continual_a fever_n accompany_v with_o much_o head_n ache_n and_o pain_n throughout_o all_o my_o body_n but_o divine_a love_n methought_n continue_v his_o operation_n and_o set_v i_o all_o a_o flame_n with_o holy_a fire_n so_o that_o i_o often_o cry_v out_o o_o love_n o_o love_n o_o love_n and_o can_v say_v nothing_o else_o when_o i_o seem_v as_o a_o die_a man_n my_o friend_n weep_v about_o i_o and_o every_o one_o say_v i_o can_v hardly_o recover_v my_o soul_n behold_v all_o this_o without_o be_v touch_v with_o any_o sentiment_n of_o regret_n or_o tenderness_n for_o my_o friend_n be_v whole_o take_v up_o with_o divine_a love_n which_o do_v so_o entire_o unite_v i_o to_o the_o good_a pleasure_n of_o god_n that_o methinks_v i_o can_v never_o be_v separate_v from_o it_o it_o be_v no_o part_n of_o my_o care_n to_o beg_v for_o my_o life_n and_o one_o of_o my_o friend_n propose_v to_o send_v i_o some_o relic_n of_o saint_n which_o have_v do_v miraculous_a cure_n i_o only_o thank_v he_o for_o though_o i_o have_v no_o small_a veneration_n for_o they_o yet_o i_o have_v no_o mind_n to_o make_v use_n of_o they_o for_o my_o recovery_n but_o i_o will_v whole_o put_v myself_o into_o the_o hand_n of_o divine_a love_n and_o leave_v myself_o entire_o to_o the_o conduct_n thereof_o whether_o for_o life_n or_o death_n for_o time_n or_o eternity_n in_o this_o extreme_a weakness_n of_o body_n my_o soul_n find_v herself_o victorious_a and_o triumphant_a to_o see_v that_o fall_n of_o pain_n and_o herself_o full_a of_o love_n and_o instead_o of_o be_v compassionate_a seem_v to_o i_o to_o smile_v at_o these_o suffering_n this_o be_v a_o extraordinary_a effect_n of_o love_n that_o in_o this_o great_a weakness_n of_o body_n my_o soul_n keep_v up_o her_o strength_n and_o especial_o that_o the_o great_a pain_n of_o my_o head_n do_v not_o hinder_v she_o interiour_n occupation_n this_o disposition_n of_o love_n continue_v as_o long_o as_o my_o sickness_n and_o i_o entertain_v my_o friend_n with_o little_a consideration_n and_o i_o believe_v with_o too_o much_o talk_v fear_v now_o to_o have_v discover_v then_o too_o much_o those_o holy_a fire_n that_o inflame_v my_o heart_n and_o that_o self-love_n make_v i_o declare_v too_o free_o my_o inward_a feeling_n my_o thought_n now_o make_v i_o suspect_v this_o defect_n but_o be_v inebriate_v with_o love_n i_o say_v i_o know_v not_o what_o be_v like_o a_o drunken_a man_n that_o for_o a_o time_n forget_v his_o poverty_n and_o misery_n so_o in_o this_o disposition_n i_o forget_v my_o sin_n and_o extreme_a frailty_n and_o cast_v myself_o into_o the_o arm_n of_o love_n that_o i_o may_v be_v unite_v with_o my_o well-beloved_a and_o enjoy_v his_o reciprocal_a embrace_n i_o have_v a_o care_n to_o examine_v my_o conscience_n and_o confess_v my_o sin_n as_o a_o die_a man_n and_o set_v in_o order_n my_o temporal_a affair_n to_o pass_v to_o eternity_n find_v myself_o not_o able_a to_o give_v much_o to_o the_o poor_a it_o be_v a_o joy_n to_o i_o to_o die_v in_o poverty_n and_o i_o be_v as_o well_o content_a to_o give_v
martyrdom_n end_v both_o together_o chap._n viii_o the_o interiour_n cross_n of_o the_o soul_n in_o obscurity_n the_o soul_n in_o the_o state_n of_o obscurity_n hardly_o know_v herself_o she_o be_v so_o change_v from_o what_o she_o be_v for_o in_o the_o state_n of_o enjoyment_n the_o inferior_a part_n of_o the_o soul_n with_o all_o her_o repugnance_n to_o suffering_n be_v quite_o lose_v in_o her_o present_a delight_n so_o that_o the_o soul_n feel_v no_o pain_n at_o all_o nothing_o hinder_v her_o repose_n she_o taste_v nothing_o but_o sweetness_n and_o have_v no_o sentiment_n unless_o of_o peace_n and_o tranquillity_n but_o on_o the_o contrary_a in_o the_o state_n of_o interiour_n suffer_v the_o supreme_a part_n of_o the_o soul_n be_v as_o it_o be_v absorp_v in_o the_o repugnance_n and_o disgust_n of_o nature_n her_o light_n be_v so_o surround_v with_o darkness_n that_o she_o be_v leave_v in_o obscurity_n and_o all_o her_o joy_n be_v take_v from_o she_o although_o she_o may_v be_v very_o well_o resign_v she_o imagine_v she_o be_v not_o for_o her_o intellectual_a conformity_n be_v cloud_v from_o she_o but_o she_o have_v always_o before_o her_o eye_n the_o revolt_n of_o nature_n and_o the_o contradiction_n she_o find_v to_o god_n good_a pleasure_n and_o in_o a_o manner_n believe_v she_o have_v no_o intellectual_a resignation_n she_o become_v doubtful_a of_o her_o condition_n whereby_o she_o be_v much_o terrify_v and_o plunge_v in_o a_o sea_n of_o bitterness_n a_o soul_n in_o this_o state_n of_o misery_n be_v well_o please_v to_o god_n but_o she_o not_o know_v it_o remain_v full_a of_o doubt_n and_o sadness_n yet_o if_o you_o ask_v this_o soul_n if_o she_o be_v resign_v to_o the_o will_n of_o god_n she_o will_v ready_o reply_v yes_o and_o that_o she_o have_v rather_o die_v than_o not_o will_n what_o please_v god_n however_o this_o act_n of_o resignation_n do_v not_o free_v she_o from_o her_o fear_n because_o she_o will_v this_o in_o a_o manner_n without_o know_v it_o be_v she_o will._n our_o bless_a saviour_n by_o a_o admirable_a design_n of_o providence_n to_o purify_v this_o soul_n the_o more_o by_o her_o suffering_n hinder_v her_o reflection_n on_o this_o act_n of_o conformity_n and_o resignation_n so_o that_o she_o receive_v no_o comfort_n by_o this_o conformity_n be_v in_o the_o dark_a and_o yet_o be_v not_o altogether_o leave_v in_o desolation_n but_o in_o this_o state_n she_o be_v please_v to_o god_n though_o she_o be_v much_o displease_v with_o herself_o it_o seem_v to_o i_o that_o a_o soul_n in_o this_o state_n of_o obscurity_n be_v more_o faithful_a to_o god_n than_o in_o abundance_n of_o illumination_n to_o be_v thus_o in_o the_o midst_n of_o thick_a darkness_n and_o believe_v the_o perfection_n of_o the_o divinity_n and_o the_o mystery_n of_o our_o holy_a faith_n as_o firm_o as_o if_o they_o be_v clear_v up_o unto_o we_o by_o the_o great_a light_n and_o illustration_n do_v testify_v a_o extraordinary_a fidelity_n in_o the_o soul_n to_o god_n and_o a_o annihilation_n of_o our_o judgement_n and_o a_o high_a esteem_n of_o god_n veracity_n what_o wonder_n be_v it_o to_o see_v god_n and_o his_o grandeur_n in_o abundance_n of_o light_n but_o to_o do_v this_o when_o the_o soul_n be_v in_o darkness_n this_o be_v admirable_a happy_a be_v those_o soul_n who_o god_n conduct_n in_o this_o way_n let_v they_o not_o complain_v of_o their_o privation_n see_v this_o be_v to_o the_o end_n they_o may_v more_o glorify_v god_n and_o best_a testify_v their_o fidelity_n o_o my_o soul_n let_v we_o be_v in_o a_o indifferency_n for_o any_o condition_n for_o a_o state_n of_o light_n or_o darkness_n benedicite_fw-la lux_fw-la &_o tenebrae_fw-la domino_fw-la and_o if_o divine_a providence_n try_v we_o with_o obscurity_n let_v we_o be_v comfort_v and_o believe_v that_o god_n deal_v well_o with_o we_o esteem_v this_o privation_n as_o a_o favour_n from_o heaven_n i_o confess_v it_o be_v a_o difficult_a matter_n to_o be_v as_o well_o satisfy_v in_o darkness_n as_o in_o the_o splendour_n of_o paradise_n but_o if_o we_o make_v serious_a reflection_n that_o the_o perfection_n of_o christianity_n consist_v in_o a_o life_n of_o privation_n and_o poverty_n of_o spirit_n it_o will_v be_v no_o matter_n of_o admiration_n behold_v s._n john_n live_v he_o not_o in_o a_o desert_n deprive_v of_o all_o thing_n his_o delight_n be_v austerity_n hunger_n poverty_n to_o be_v unknown_a to_o the_o world_n and_o to_o lose_v his_o life_n by_o the_o hand_n of_o the_o hangman_n and_o which_o be_v more_o he_o be_v deprive_v of_o the_o conversation_n of_o jesus_n christ_n one_o of_o the_o great_a interior_a cross_n be_v to_o lose_v the_o sight_n of_o our_o eye_n nevertheless_o there_o be_v something_o in_o this_o cross_n that_o make_v it_o lovely_a in_o that_o it_o put_v we_o in_o a_o more_o absolute_a dependence_n on_o god_n i_o have_v a_o devotion_n to_o be_v in_o the_o spiritual_a life_n what_o a_o blind_a man_n be_v in_o the_o corporal_n he_o go_v and_o come_v he_o talk_v to_o his_o friend_n he_o do_v his_o little_a affair_n he_o eat_v and_o drink_v and_o all_o this_o without_o see_v his_o way_n or_o his_o friend_n or_o the_o room_n or_o heaven_n or_o earth_n only_o he_o give_v himself_o up_o to_o the_o guidance_n of_o his_o conductor_n it_o be_v true_a to_o do_v all_o these_o action_n of_o our_o civil_a life_n in_o this_o sort_n be_v not_o so_o please_v but_o they_o be_v as_o real_o do_v as_o in_o the_o light_n so_o a_o soul_n that_o be_v without_o light_n do_v the_o action_n of_o a_o spiritual_a life_n not_o so_o pleasant_o indeed_o but_o yet_o true_o and_o perfect_o see_v she_o perform_v they_o in_o the_o annihilation_n of_o her_o light_n and_o proper_a satisfaction_n it_o seem_v to_o i_o that_o a_o soul_n ought_v not_o to_o complain_v so_o much_o of_o the_o linger_n of_o this_o our_o pilgrimage_n where_o we_o live_v in_o the_o obscurity_n of_o faith_n and_o not_o so_o earnest_o desire_v the_o dissolution_n of_o this_o mortal_a body_n under_o pretence_n to_o see_v clear_o and_o be_v unite_v perfect_o to_o the_o king_n of_o glory_n for_o real_o i_o fear_v these_o complaint_n be_v not_o so_o innocent_a as_o we_o image_v see_v they_o may_v proceed_v from_o a_o disgust_n of_o suffering_n in_o a_o state_n of_o privation_n and_o so_o we_o be_v more_o concern_v for_o our_o own_o satisfaction_n than_o content_a with_o the_o good_a pleasure_n of_o god_n chap._n ix_o of_o the_o heaviness_n of_o interior_a cross_n god_n sometime_o treat_v a_o soul_n in_o a_o manner_n as_o a_o reprobate_n banish_v she_o from_o his_o presence_n and_o deprive_v she_o of_o all_o enjoyment_n for_o more_o or_o less_o time_n as_o he_o think_v good_a during_o this_o state_n to_o preserve_v a_o perfect_a resignation_n to_o god_n will_v be_v to_o practice_v pure_a virtue_n and_o those_o soul_n must_v be_v very_o faithful_a that_o be_v capable_a thereof_o the_o soul_n in_o enjoyment_n be_v as_o if_o she_o be_v glorify_v she_o feel_v no_o trouble_n her_o passion_n neither_o disturb_v her_o peace_n nor_o darken_v her_o light_n she_o be_v full_a of_o contentment_n delight_v in_o god_n the_o creature_n do_v not_o divert_v she_o from_o the_o creator_n and_o if_o at_o any_o time_n they_o seem_v to_o stop_v her_o course_n she_o present_o double_v her_o pace_n to_o hasten_v after_o her_o well-beloved_a be_v a_o tracted_a with_o the_o odour_n of_o his_o perfume_n but_o in_o the_o state_n of_o interiour_n suffer_v the_o soul_n become_v a_o captive_n load_v with_o iron_n buffet_v with_o temptation_n disturb_v with_o rebellious_a passion_n lose_v in_o extravagant_a thought_n so_o that_o she_o can_v draw_v near_o to_o god_n but_o like_o a_o poor_a criminal_a lie_v in_o a_o dark_a dungeon_n be_v leave_v to_o herself_o without_o any_o sensible_a relief_n this_o be_v her_o sad_a conditition_n in_o this_o miserable_a captivity_n without_o either_o divine_a or_o humane_a consolation_n the_o influence_n of_o heavenbeing_n withhold_v from_o she_o and_o the_o refreshment_n of_o earth_n deny_v she_o crucify_v between_o they_o both_o without_o help_n from_o either_o in_o this_o state_n the_o soul_n be_v in_o continual_a fear_n of_o offend_a god_n and_o fall_v from_o her_o spiritual_a exercise_n that_o she_o seek_v comfort_n from_o creature_n and_o be_v so_o injurious_a to_o her_o divine_a centre_n from_o who_o only_o she_o ought_v to_o receive_v repose_n and_o contentment_n however_o she_o may_v much_o honour_n god_n by_o these_o interior_a suffering_n if_o she_o thereby_o do_v homage_n to_o the_o dereliction_n of_o the_o son_n of_o god_n in_o his_o torment_n on_o the_o cross_n the_o eminency_n of_o a_o supernatural_a life_n find_v matter_n of_o practice_n in_o all_o sort_n of_o suffering_n interior_a or_o exterior_a but_o methinks_v the_o soul_n can_v never_o be_v