then the Consolation I have in your sweet promise Sir does I confess allay to Doggett Quick O prithee good Spouse that must be no more Love now my Bones smart a little too much at present to let me entertain any Amorous Motions Ah Plague of their Rusty Bills that Rogue Cunningman took care they should all fall on me still but what 's most Comical As I was running off after you he comes up to me and with a grave Face as if he had known nothing of the matter invites me to drink a stand of Ale with him this Evening at Numpses Fred. Ha ha ha ha and wilt thou go Quick Ay by this Light will I and if I can mould that dull headed Fellow once more rightly my Witty Antagonist shall have but little cause to boast his late success come Courage Sir they shall make Paste of my Bones with their Battoons e're I give up a Cause I 've undertaken whilst my Brains lye in their right place This Evening will prove all till then farewell If I get the Dice once on my side the Golds my own yet I 've Art enough to manage them I 'm sure Exit Marm. I must follow him and put him once more in mind Fred. If Fulvia were Heiress apparent to the Universe there could not be more Wit nor diligence us'd obout her This is the third time our Confederate Forces have been repuls'd And Faith were I not sensible the Castle were stor'd with the best sort of Ammunition tempting Gold I think I should have long since raised the Siege I must confess my self to be of that Pagan Opinion that there is no one Quality belonging to a Woman unless it be her Money that can countervail a Man's playing the Fool in Courting her a Month for This was my Plea with Sophronia once who has some simple passionate Papers of mine still that I wish I had out of her hands my deserting was not so very just its true but then 't was very profitable and this damn'd Money has power to make a Rogue of a Man often times Constancy that 's most certain Exit SCENE 2. Enter Sophronia and Fulvia Soph. Nay if you 'r in a Passion I 'll desist but if you 'll hear I 'll prove it Fulvia What that Frederick's false Oh 't is ridiculous Mallice and I 'll not believe it I know she lov'd him her self once and this is now the product of her Poph. Aside Soph. False as Brieno to Olimpia in the Story base Mercenary the worst degree of Falsehood Fulvia Ha ha ha ha you rave you rave Cousin I pitty ye pray go home and let blood you are dangerously distemper'd take my word Soph. Not with thy Disease Child I 'm sure I swear I would not have it for the World Fulvia You talk as if I had the Gout or Palsie or a long Family Rhumatism that distinguish'd the Blood of my Relations for ten Ages VVhat Diseease is 't you mean take heed of Scandel Cousin Soph. Nay do you take heed on 't Cousin for the Disease that I mean has generally some Infection that way 't is called a Masculine Calenture or the Plague of Man-loving it often seizes upon Creatures of thy Age and is of that strange Nature that it dulls and Numbs the Brains as if they were froze which must be chas'd and warmed a long time by Reason and Argument or else the Patient will never return to her right Senses Fulvia Lord that 's a terrible Disease indeed but yet for all its violence I have Brains enough left to see a distemper in you too Cousin 't is the Plague of Greediness and you use me as the great Sister in a Country Cottage does the lesser you would pack me to Bed without any Supper because you have a mind to my Bread and Butter Soph. No no Child the Case differs between us extreamly some may feast with a Rasher upon the Coals whilst others â—…eck at the very smell And I must have thy Stomach before I can be greedy of thy Dyet Fulvia Come come Cousin you have stomach enough nay indeed so much that you grow sullen with it and like a little Child won't eat your Meal till you see the Plate ready to be given away to another for as homely a bit as you make of that Rasher if I am mot mistaken in the Morsel you would be glad of it to relish your Mornings Draught and for all your Course Name of Rasher tartly think it a Gnatt or a VVheat-Ear Soph. If Frederick be the Wheat-Ear you mean I had rather have an Old Caoon at the latter end of Iuly Fulvia Ah you shall never banter me with that you 'd think him a young Pheasant at the latter end of October if you had him to my knowledge Soph. I think him prithee if his Spesies were chnaged and he were turned into a Cormorant a Buzzard or an Owl 't were all one to me Fulvia Any thing but the Capon Cousin you were speaking of I dare swear for all your Anger you have too much Charity to wish him turned into that Sophr. It does so little concern my Charity that I should like my Hen with Eggs very well without any trouble to know they should never come to be Chickens and consequently Cocks of the Game Besides there is so much ill Blood begot now a days and so many Strains Crossed that if for the Future the Sex were all Capons â—… question whether the King would lose e're a good Subject by 't Fulvia This is your Satyricall Vein now Oh! how you Fatten your self with this humour just like a Noncon that rails at Episcopacy not or any just reason but through self will'd Opinion and rediculous Envy else why is Frederick still the Theam of Railing Soph. Oh! thou ungrateful Creature have I not told thee 't is through kindness to thee Fulvia To me rather say through Hatred to him because he Loves me Soph. He Loves thee not his baseness does deceave thee Mercenary Soul Covets thy Fortune thy Person is the least of all his wishes Fulvia Just so I dream't indeed aside but 't is Barbarity to doubt a Lover for an Idle dream I 'll not be so unjust come come 't is all Envy and to deal freely with ye I now must tell ye I take it as an affront not as a kindness Soph. That 's always a Fools humour when they have not Brains enough to know the Courtesy they term it an Affront Fulvia Well for all your mighty Wit this shall not get your Ends I see your Hatred and your Envy to him and consequently judge his Love to me I 'll Marry him in spite of all the World Soph. Thou shalt not Marry him tho all the World assist thee Fulvia How poor is this and mean because my merit appears above those in his deserving Eyes thy Heart breeds venom and thy Slaundrous Tongue dissention between Lovers Soph. Lovers Damnation how She Tortures me I tell thee
of my own fate let 'em drink let 'em roar let 'em sing what is 't to me I 'll do the same Sings How vile are the sordid Intrigues of the Town Cheating and lying perpetually sway From Bully and Punk to the Politick Gown In plotting and sotting they wast the whole day Let me have Musick and bring in Orpheus there O my hard fortune Guiac So now the Fit 's almost spent let 'em come in there she sits down these are Lunaticks by me appointed on purpose to indulge the Humour the one was a Young hot blooded Officer that being balk'd in a Battel against the French in Flanders fell mad upon 't the Woman crack'd her Brain with Pride and Malice hearing her Lover say another was handsomer and better dress'd at a â—…ourt Ball. There 's a Song in parts between a mad Man and a mad Woman then two other mad Men who sit down then enter Numps and Quickwit like a mad Man with a Paper Guiac You may perceive by this Sir Charles the Frenzy will wear off by degrees but see here comes my Lord. Quick Though Cerberus bark the Cat-a-mountain howl Though Winds do roar and Waves do rowl Mopsa's my Life Mopsa's my Soul grins Numps Worse and worse ah lack-a-day ah lack-a-day O my poor Maister Guiac His Distemper vents it self much in scraps of Poetry which shews it to be the more violent and dangerous Sir Char. Why so good Doctor Guiac Why Sir Poetry is a kind of Madness in it self and must consequently make a very ill addition to the Patients Distemper I 'll speak to him what have you there my Lord Quick Treason in black and white Though Cerberus bark the Cat amountain howl I 'll conjure for her I 'll go down below into the Devils dairy there I shall find her licking the Cream-bowls or pressing Curds to make Beelzebub a Cheese Hark ye Patron are you the Devil Guiac The Devil not I my Lord bless me what a question 's there Quick Nor yet his Dam Guiac Nor his Dam neither I 'm your Doctor my Lord. Quick Bring Mopsa then I 'll drown my self in Tears else falls down Numps O worse and worse O that chave liv'd to zee this day odswokers he had as notable a Pate a Vortnight ago as e'er a one in our Shire our Minister at home was a Bottlehead toun and now to zee the Case zo chang'd and hear un talk zo like a Vool odswoker che can't forbear weeping vor the heart o' me howls out T. Rom. O prethee Pox take thee for a Bumpkin what a howling dost thou make ah my dear sweet Miss Ginger-bread ' gad take me I shall grow as mad as they if I am kept here much longer kisses the Letter Shink There is fery goot moralities and observations to be made in this place look you Cousins therefore pray you have patience Quick Hast brought her that 's my Boy ay there she is I know her now Starting up Sings By those Pignies that Stars do seem Those Breasts as white as Curds and Cream Those Cherry Lips and dimpled Chin T is Mopsa that shall be my Queen Guiac She makes up to him now the Distemper works now they are curing one another the two mad Men rise and dance with ' em Dance Fulvia Sings Art thou the Crack-brain'd Fool thou seem'st to be Quick Art thou a white-fac'd Ape as mad as he A foolish Female nice and shy That never yet trod shooe awry Nor suffer'd youngster by the by To have a singer in the Pye Fulvia In spight of Rings and Bracelets gay Sweet Iunkets on a Holyday Or all that silly Men can say I 'm still of Vesta's Train a Maid Quick 'T is then for want of Humane Aid Fulv. No no. Quick Ay ay Fulv. No no. Quick Ay ay Fulv. I 'm still a Maid Quick O fye O fye Fulv. In thought and deed and so will die Quick You are a Fool or else you lye but if thou art go to the Queen and beg me for I must hang to Morrow for a Rape committed upon fifteen Richmond Virgins thirty years old and upwards that have stood the shock of Mankind most miraculously there 's my Petition read it and away gives her a Letter Fulv. By Heaven 't is Frederick's Hand and I find now this is all seign'd madness and a Plot of his to bring me off O ye dear witty Creature aside Quick Cry ye mercy Sir by that shaggy Eyebrow and that pulls Guiac away grizled Phiz I know ye now you are the Recorder Guiac Variety of Madness he said I was the Devil just now and now he takes me for the Recorder Quick There there 's your Fee and pray defer my Sentence I must not come to th' Gallows I have Money let friendless Fellons Fools and Beggars dangle I 'll bribe thee well I must not hang I 've Money Sir Char. The mad Fool speaks now methodically Money indeed will do any thing Quick What do I see a guard to bear me off and before Sentence nay then have at ye avaunt ye Slaves ye Pultroons scoure ye Vipers a rescue a rescue fall on my Friends down with ' em snatches a Sword from T. Romance and beats ' em Sir Char. Ah Plague of our heedless folly to come Arm'd amongst mad Men there 's no contending with him Quickwit drives 'em about the Stage T. Rom. My Lord my Lord ' odsdeath what d' ye mean Shink Mean to a mad Man that is fery simple by St. Davy goot her Lord have patience Shinken was her friend and fery humble Servant look you Guiac My Lord my Lord I am the Recorder you know Quick beats ' em Quick The Devil thou art down with 'em there a rescue a rescue Guiac Am I a Devil again nay then there 's no fence against a flail I must give way too Exit Guiacum and Quickwit locks the Door Quick Ha ha ha so if this was not well play'd I 'll n'er Act part again Fulv. Thou art the best of Actors and shalt be rewarded accordingly nor shall honest Numps be forgotten neither Numps Odswokers che can make a Vool of vorty such Doctors as this is Quick Your Ladyship would make an admirable Actress faith Madam to out-wit the Doctor so artificially 't is a Masterpiece Fulv. Ha ha ha and before the grave Knight and young Fool 's face too Quick Ha ha ha ha and but reasonable Madam what should a Fool do with so fine a Lady Fulv. O Sir your Complement some other time come whilst we have this opportunity let 's into my Closet and consult about the manner of my escape Quick Which is contriv'd methodically in that Letter there by your Lover who I hope suddenly shall be happy in his reward too Fulv. If faithful Love and an obedient Wife can make him happy he may assure himself of me I know his Merit and have a Soul to prize it Nor shall the wretched Customs of the World That change the sweets of Love
t' a sordid Bargain Ever corrupt my Nature wealth is a good addition And shall be given by me a Slave to vertue And wait upon the kind brave Man I love Who Weds a Fool affronts her humane Nature Who can be kind to such a Brutal Creature 'T is Wit with Love improves the Marriage Charms And such a Man is welcome to my Arms. Exeunt The End of the Second Act. ACT III. SCENE I. Enter Cunnington and Marmalet Cunn VEL now as you hope to be de Countess and keep your six Footmen and your Page dis is all true vat you tell me Marm. Every syllable in troth Sir O fye upon my Integrity I would not tell ye a Lye for the versal World Cunn Ver good vel den I will tell you the rest of your fortune but first fesh me de Almanack dat I may tell de good day from de bad dat is material point Marm. Yes Sir I 'll bring it presently a Countess why well fare thy heart old Ienny six Footmen and a Page odsme I 'm overjoy'd Exit Cunn So I have squeez'd her as dry as a spunge already the Heiress in this House that Sir Charles Romance designs for his Son only feigns her self mad and Quickwit is by a Trick to get her away for young Frederick ha ha ha ha I warrant he thinks himself as secure of her now as a Cat is of a Mouse that he has between his Paw ha ha ha alas poor Fool but if I aim right he shall find himself damnably mistaken for what will I do now but privately go and discover all to Sir Charles so get my self a swinging Reward and Quickwit a Plaguy beating that shall stick by him this Month ha ha ha ' gad I love such a mischief with all my heart how it tickles me I grow even fat at the conceit on 't O here comes my Countess I must dispatch this old Fool first and then away Mum now for fortune-telling Re-enter Marmalet with an Almanack Marm. Here 's an Almanack and 't please ye Cunn O let me see Iune Iune Iune Iuly Vere be de changing his voice Dog-day dat he de ver good time to make de Intrigue let me see you say you ver born in Iuly Marm. The fourteenth and shall please ye Cunn Oh Ver good ver good now shake your left Arm and your right Leg both together vich we call in Astrology de simple motion Marm. Is that right pray Sir Shakes her Arm and Leg awkardly Cunn Yes yes dat vill do ver well dat I must needs say is de ver simple motion indeed Marm. But Sir you tell me nothing all this while pray Sir what good fortune shall I have and particularly I beseech ye Sir to give me leave to ask that question that we Maids most desire to know which is when shall I be married and please ye Cunn Cry Hymen vid a sigh one two tre time so now sit cross-legg'd and turn de Gnomon of your face dat is your nose pulls her Nose to de North East dat's right now smile a little smile foolishly like right now let me feel your pulse aw ver well I see now you shall have for your Husband de ver Gentleman dat vas to steal away your Lady She makes silly grimaces Marm. What Mr. Quickwit and shall I be no Countess after all this Cunn Zoon Metresse have de patience and understand your good Fortune he shall live to be let me see Baron of Barn-elms and if de Planet dat I see dere say right he shall be Duke of Twitnam Mortlack and Brainford go go presently find him out and make de Love to him for I see by my Art dat dis is de Critical minute and ver fit for your purpose go Marm. Well I vow Sir you have ravished me with your Words Dutchess of Twitnam Mortlack and Brainford why this is prodigious Lord to see how preferment will puff up a body methinks a Countess is too small a title now Cunn Hark you one word more if he refuse you take two tre more of your Female Friend vid good Cudgel and beat him vor de Star do appoint dat way to make soft his Heart and Inclination fear noting beat him but soundly and he shall love you for ever after Adieu I must get out and laugh somewhere or I shall burst Aside Exit Marm. Dutchess of Twitnam Mortlack and Brainford O Lord methinks I don 't feel the ground I go on Well this is a most admirable Person as I 'm a Christian and of most profound skill for he told me some marks about me as right as if he had been by when I was brought into the World Well if Cudgelling my Lover will make me noble I 'll get them that shall lay it on with a good will In troth for methinks I long to be call'd your Grace your Grace Lord how it tickles me pray Heaven my Brain stand firm for I 've heard these new honours are very intoxicating Exit Enter Quickwit Fulvia and Numps Quick You 'll be sure to be ready Madam against twelve at Night Fulv. As punctual as the Minute get you but the door open that can let us into the Garden and for the rest let me alone Quick For that let me alone and do'e hear Numps be sure you take your opportunity to slip out and acquaint Mr. Frederick that the Coach may be ready at the time ' dsheart if we should fail in our business to Night I should be poyson'd before noon to Morrow with Pills Powders and confounded Potions which I see are preparing for me yonder for Heavens sake how came you to 'scape Madam Fulv. Why my being obstinate at first has made the Fool take an opinion that he can cure me with specificks 'T is such a positive Coxcomb that if he once gets a notion into his Head there 's no removing it tho never so absurd or ridiculous Come Numps come you along with me you must carry a Letter for me Numps A Letter for ye ah would you were to be folded up into a Letter your self and I were to carry ye to Mr. Frederick I 'd trudge for ye heartily I would odswokers there 's my word still Fulv. Well Numps he shall know the good service you would do him but for the present let 's part for fear the Doctor should be prying about my Lord de la Fool your Lordships most humble ha ha Exit Numps Oh my poor Maister O O! odswokers the job goes on rarely Exit Quickwit Solus Quick So I think I 'm in as pretty a way now to get five hundred pounds as heart can wish nothing but the very Devil or my Friend Cunnington can hinder the happy conclusion now and I think I have been cunning enough to keep it out of his reach I know the Rogue will envy my good fortune but that will breed occasion for more mirth hereafter and when the Guinneas are in my hand once I shall have
the Wheel Hell take all Heiresses and all the Sex besides Exit Fred. Sir Quib. Ha ha ha alas poor Brother I see now I am to be the happy Man Fulvia Troth no Sir I must beg your pardon too your Estate is wasted with disbursing Sums to go a Fortune-hunting nor have you Brains enough to get another and to marry a Ninny a Bankrupt no as you us'd to say Sir I a'n't such a Fool neither T. Rom. You may send home your Coach Sir Quibble you will have no use for it here Gad take me Sir Quib. Why then a Plague of all Intrigues I 'll go and get drunk and despise all Womankind for I 'll say 't I 'll ne're hang my self about the matter but I 'll have my Money again if there be Law in England let the Women go to the Devil I 'll not be chous'd out of that what a Pox I a'n't such a Fool neither Exit Sir Quibble Fulvia Ha ha ha thus far Sir Charles you see how far I have discharg'd your Trust do ye resolve therefore to deliver up your Guardianship freely that I may have generous liberty to pursue my Inclinations Sir Char. Madam with all my heart before this Company I declare you free to chuse a new Guardian where you please and to confirm it take there the Keys where all your Writings are and the Power left me by your Father I see she intends to give her self generously to my Son and therefore to confine her were ungenerous Aside to the Doctor Guiac There stands the Gentleman Madam if you design him happy the quicker work the better Fulvia That might have been done indeed Doctor to oblige Sir Charles but the Gentleman you speak of has made a better choice as this can witness Gives Sir Charles a Letter Sir Char. How 's this a Letter of Courtship to Sophronia Fulvia Oh! and so full of Passion Flame and Darts that it almost scorch'd me when I read it Sir Char. Oh Villain Dolâ—… Town-Fop have I been racking my Brains all this while to get an Heiress to thy purpose what 's the meaning of this Sirrah T. Rom. Why the meaning is that I love all the Sex gad take me and can no more confine my self to one Woman than to one Suit of Cloaths if you don 't like the humour you might have got me a better that 's all I know of the matter Sir Char. Insupportable Coxcomb I 'll disinherit thee immediately Guiac More turns and Plots this is a very Comedy by the life of Gallen Hoâ—…sp So I find I am like to Cudgel my five hundred Pounds out of my Spark for the Devil a penâ—…y â—…e's like to get by the Heiress but stay who the Devil will she chuse if I should be the Man at last Fulvia Since such a general defect of honesty corrupts the Age I 'll no more trust Mankind but lay my Fortune out upon my self and flourish in contempt of humane Falshood as for thy part that hast been a main Acter in this business and with contriving wit well manag'd it to let thee see th' Ingenious still gets Friends I will with Gold reward thy Industry nor shall honest Numps may nor your Coâ—…ade be either of theâ—… forgotten but be instantly brought hither and share a part of Bounty To Quickwit Quick 'T is my Glory Madam to be outwitted by you and if my Brain did any thing uncommon it was by you inspir'd Marm. Well 〈◊〉 Fortune has contriv'd the business so I hope Sir you think it time to remember me Quick Oh prithee dear venerability have patience a little thou â—…eest all the Marriages are 〈◊〉 at present and 't is not fit we should be singular my dear Antiquâ—… Marm. Alas sweet Sir but delays you kmâ—…w are dangerous and if I should be balk'd in my Expectation my heart is so set upon'â—… that I should anihilate that very moment I should dye as I 'm a Christian. Fulvia Well Cousin what think we now of my Resolution have I not done Justice Soph. Most generous Maid thou art a dear Example for all thâ—… Sâ—… to copy out thy Virtue for that a kind and tender heart like 〈◊〉 moulded for Love and softned with Endearments should generously on the account of honour resist a Traytor that with strong Eâ—…hantments of Vows and Oaths had long time made Impression is a performance heightned to a wonder and will be reverenc'd in succeeding ages Fulvia My eyes in contradiction to the World have ever scorning Interest fix'd on Merit and led by Love and Generous inclination have strove to make that Sentiment appear by a free present of my Heart and Fortune to one I thought as nobly had deserv'd ' em But oh the Race of Men are all Deceivers and my relief is my resolve to shun 'em 't is my dear Friend as thou hast lately told me which for instruction I will still repeat Love may seeem great that in it self is small Looks cover thoughts and Interest governs all When Damon to an Heiress speaks kind things 'T is not for what she is but what she brings Exeunt EPILOGUE OF all the Criticks met to judge this Play The Fortune-Hunters most are fear'd to day Who must be vext that they 've a Brother found So odly balk'd of fifty thousand Pound And I confess they have some cause to rage The Spark has lost a tempting Equipage A Coach a set of Barbs such dazling things Nay six lac'd Footmen finer than the Kings Besides a fine bred Miss embroider'd round With a Rump Crosheâ—… worth five hundred Pound These Gemâ—… to lose of deep concern must be But yet considering the equality How oft ye chouce poor Women is 't not fit Once in an age the Biter should be bit To be so often fool'â—… I think is civil But to be Changelings always is the Devil Besides the truth is we find out your Arts. Love guilds your Tongues but Money guides your Hearts In Songs you term ouâ—… Faces Charming fair But 't is the gilt Charming face our Gold 〈◊〉 â—…ar That treats us with your Poetry and Air. If she 's a swinging Fortune he the cry Then gad there 's no such Angel in the Skie But should Small-Pox or Poverty invade Then who would visit such a Polâ—…cat Iade And Plague upon her is your Serenade Of moderate Worth or Wealth you 'll ne're allow She must be still the Eagle or the Crow This Theâ—…m occasions our new Scenes to Night To shew a Woman 〈◊〉 was in the right The Satyr's gentle and I think 't is 〈◊〉 And only meant to teach yâ—… to be true You should with patience bear the â—…ling smart Kiss the kind Rod and take it in good part But if you swell and sâ—…ew a stubborn Heart If in your Breasts ungrateful Passions sâ—…ay And you should 〈◊〉 at me and at the Play May theâ—… 〈◊〉 dire Revenge pursue ye round Mâ—… 〈◊〉 one that has such an Heiress found Lose her at last and fifty thousand Pound FINIS
once more thou deceived poor Creature he does not Love thee nor cannot Marry thee if he would which is a secret nothing but sweet revenge could e're draw from me Fulvia What will you Cunjure shall your plain dealing Faculty Convert it self to Magick or d' ee carry a little Familiar under your Girdle to Enchant us upon occasion which way will you do this Soph. That e're the Clock sound Midnight thou shalt know in the mean time let thy Young Hotbrain'd wild unthinking Head remember this from me Love may seem great that in its self is small Looks cover thoughts and interest governs all When Damon to an Heiress speaks kind things 'T is not for what she is but what she brings Exit Fulvia She has so much moved the passion in my Soul my Eyes can scarce contain it what discovery she can make I know not but long to be resolved t is true we have had so many lets and troubles in this business as if Providence it self dislik'd the proceedings but still this is no proof besides he has Sworn his faithful Love so often 't were infamous and dishonourable to doubt it Enter Sir Charles and Stockjobb Sir Charles Madam I need not tell you my resentments nor how I rellish your ungenerous dealings you have reason enough to guess and after guessing have wit enough to make me satisfaction Fulvia Well Sir Charles consideration you know ne're comes too late Sir Charles Right Madam and to shew you that I practice it my self I will forget your late Discoveries and once more address my self an humble Suitor on my Sons behalf Fulvia I will consider of it mean time believe this fairness of your Temper wins me more then all your plots and Stratagems before Stock Come come Slapdash t will be a Match faith and so forth gad I 'll say this for Squire Thomas he 's a Notable person as my wife informs me she says he pushes forward into business mighty well he 'll be a great incourager of Trade and so forth Sir Charles I hope my Cander and my Love at last will force ye to be gratefull and to shew how much I prize a Reconcilement this Night we will have Revells and a Ball and I my self will drink one Glass the more in honour of the Marriage Fulvia Marriage Sir is a thing of weight but as I told ye Sir I will consider of it and to that purpose begg the favour to retire a little Exit Sir Charles Do so and rest your self against the Evening for Tom intends to lead ye a brisk measure i'faith so I hope all will be right now she seems considerative which is one great step to Sentiment and Knowledge Exit Sir Charles Stock Pugh Slapdash the woman has it in her head now Sir Charles all will go well I see 't Enter Hotspur in haste Hots Now Sir if you have any regard to your Honour or the Reputation of a Citizen of London as you have formerly flourished upon come along with me and you shall see what a Snake you have foster'd up or to speak in plainer Terms you shall see what a Cuckold you are Stock Come y' are a rude Hectorly to'ther end of Town fellow I tell yeâ—… pray keep from my House I a Cuckold because I promote business and Mannage my Wife wisely for the honour of the City Sir I scorn your words for Gadzookes I had rather be an Elephant Hotsp But in the mean time you are a Beast of another kind which come but along with me shall appeare I will shew thee such things such Monstrous things Stock What you have seen Squire Thomas I warrant go into my Wives Chamber privately or so well what then t is about business and so forth she knows what she does I warrant her Hotsp Ay but you don't know what she does to my knowledg come come you shall go I have lodged 'em all yonder the Welsh Fop and his Skittish Devil too your Rooms are all taken up and managed for the honour of the City and so forth Stock Why then they are managed according to my desire and so forth I defy any Citizens Wife within the Wails to have a better head for business than her self for I 'll hold a Hundred Pounds she has drawn one of 'em into some lucky wager or other nay nay prithee hold thy tongue gad if thou wer't one of the Apostles I 'de believe nothing against Pogry and Squire Thomas not I Hots Why then like an unbelieving Sotas thou art come and use thy Eyes nay nay no drawing back by Heaven thou shalt go Stock To laugh at thee which I know I shall do and Damnably too I a Cuckold as I said before I shall soon be an Elephant I 'm sure Exeunt SCENE 3. Enter T. Romance and Shinkin T. Rom. Well I believe I am an Orginal about Intreague I don't think there 's the fellow of me in Europe gad take me for now is my Father thumping his Brains and plotting to get this Heress for me and here am I hunting about for Sophronia upon another Intreague I conveyed a Letter to her just now by putting it into the Service Book at Church then dogg'd her home hither I must find her out for I long to know the success on 't Shink Well Shinkins was not much behind her in Intreagues neither look you for her Cousin Siss was hide her self hereabouts too who I find loves Corners and py places extreamly where gadsplut if Shinkin can find her her will put her too t for corners and py places are fery full of temptation but for all her putting too t there shall be no Marriages in the Case by St. Davy there her will peg her Pardon T. Rom. Why that 's spoke like a Man of Intreague gad take me would I had my dear Angel here that I am looking for in a Corner Enter Hotspurr and Stockjob listning Hotsp Softly softly take care they don't see ye shee s gon I find at present but I know will soon return in the mean time pray observe the Dialogue between these two Coxcombs Stock I shall observe to laugh at you Egregiously that I shall and so forth T. Rom. Pogry stays so long that I see I must leave her and go and seek out my new Charmer Hotsp Pogry de'â—… hear Sir he begins already a part to Stock Stock Well Tom Fool what o' that Shink Fye fye to desert your intreague so soon was to shew falshoods and inconstancies which is not like Man of honours look you Hotsp 'T is intreague pray mind that Hint too Sir Stock Jackanapes what hint ye Ass you what Hint T. Rom. Pox on 't her over fondness every day tries me more then a Match at Tennis here 's a Locket she gave me this Morning which it seems the Fool her Husband gave her Yesterday Stock Humph humph T. Rom. A trifle worth about Fifty Pounds I believe she teizes me with such Follies as these every minute almost