ravishing joyes that God hath prepared and laid up for all those that truly love him I intend not to speak any thing touching thâ— method nor to crave the excuse of any for any thing that may not savour with them I know from whom I have received it and he I am sure will patronize and protect it and bless it in some measure I hope unto all that shall read it but whatever success it find I shall find I am sure all that I seek for which is peace within during this life and honour glory and immortality in the World to come which good Lord grant for Christ his sake unto all those that love thee anâ— wait for thine appearing And thus dear hearts I leave you to the guidance of the gooâ— Spirit of the Lord to direct you in all your thoughts and words that they and all your actions as well as mine may be now and always acceptable in his sight who is our Strength anâ— our Redeemer to him who is able to keep you from the hour of Temptation and to preservâ— you blameless unto the hour of his coming commit and commend you remaining In London Anno 1654. IN the Name of the most Holy Glorious and blessed Trinity God the Father God the Son and God the Holy Ghost one God blessed for ever to whom be given and ascribed as all due is and to none else Honour Glory Power Might Majesty Dominion and Thanksgiving by me and by the whole world of his Elect Now and for Evermore Amen Amen So be it Lord so be it THomas Arundell the poorest vilest basest and unworthiest of all the servants of the living God altogether unworthy of that most Worthy Glorious and right Honourable Title but trusting on his mercy and free Grace to be made worthy through the merits and worthiness of Jesus Christ and in him to be accounted worthy Doth in all humility of heart most humbly beg and implore his Divine Majesty in Jesus Christ to inspire bless and assist him with his holy Spirit that he may here following set down only the sincere breathings and longings of his soul in truth and sincerity of heart and that he may grow daily from one degree of grace unto another from step to step untill he come to that height and fulness of measure of holiness appointed by God in Jesus Christ who is the Fountain the Ocean and the fulness of all Happiness and Blessedness being God equal with the Father Blessed for ever and ever A Prayer O Most Holy most Glorious Eternal incomprehensible Lord God full of Grace and Truth Maker and Giver of all things both in Heaven and in Earth from all Eternity unto all Eternity thou art and there is none besides thee God blessed for ever and ever Thou givest O Lord freely fully and continually and art never weary nor repentest all our springs are in thee and from thee thou canst not increase nor diminish whatever is done for or against thee Ah Lord my God give me so much of thy self as I may be like unto thee in all things by grace here and in glory hereafter that I may stedfastly faithfully heedfully carefully and circumspectly do thy whole and holy will on earth until I come to glorifie thy Name in Heaven O Lord conform my will unto thy most holy and most blessed will that I may serve and please thee by all my thoughts words and actions not turning aside to the right hand of pleasures or to the left hand of profits Let thy most holy and most blessed Spirit teach me lead me guide me and so direct and govern me that the thoughts of my heart the words of my mouth and the works of my hands may be now and always acceptable in thy sight O Lord my Strength and my Redeemer O Lord that searchest all hearts and triest the Reins pondering all our actions be pleased in Jesus Christ to look down upon me poor vile sinfull dust and ashes the greatest of sinners and the very worst of the worst of men and for his sake wash away all my iniquities and purge me from all my sins and my transgressions known or unknown secret or revealed past present and to come and for the merits of that most dear and pretious bloud of thy dear and only Son which was I believe shed for me on the Cross O Lord grant that I may appear blameless and spotless before thy Throne of Grace and Justice at all times when I come before thee that thou mayest have delight in me and in all the works of my hands and mayest according to thy good promise graciously hear and answer my petitions and requests which I most humbly and unfeignedly desire may be framed in my heart by thy holy Spirit that they may be according to thy holy mind and will and find acceptation through the mediation and merits of thy dear only and beloved Son Jesus Christ the Righteous And grant O most mercifull and loving Father in Jesus Christ my Redeemer that I may set down from time to time the only Dictates of thy holy and most blessed Spirit unto my poor Soul not any head-notions but my very hearts frame and only desires and motions that they may both then and ever after refresh rejoyce glad and comfort me and cause me to bring forth fruit to newness and amendment of Life for the honour and glory of thy great Name and grant that I may ever renounce all merit or worthiness in my self for the very least of all thy mercies even for the crumbs that fall by thy providence from the Childrens Table Sure I am the more light I have from thee O Lord my God I shall the better and clearer see my own darkness the more I have of thy wisdom the better I shall see the foolishness of all worldly wisdom and the errours of my own ways the more I have of thee the less I shall have of my self the more thou shalt be pleased to give me the less I shall confess I deserve and the more thou shalt be pleased to lift me up the lower I will cast my self down Ah Lord God teach me to know my self that I may hate my self teach me to know thee rightly not in the History only but in the mystery also not only without but also within that I may love thee in fear and fear thee with true unfeigned sincere spotless love wean me O Lord from the World and the World's loves let me dye to the World and to all things in it that I may live to thee Ah take me from the world ere thou takest the world from me fit me for thy self ere thou takest me to thy self let my last days be my best days and my last thoughts my best thoughts let me not live one moment longer than to do thee service and let that only be my aim and my end let thy work be my wages and thy wages my work O Lord God in Jesus Christ I most humbly
forsaken of all if thou dost here forsake God and refuse to be led guided and directed by his holy Spirit who is only able to keep thee safe from all evil and to do thee all all good 207. O man man Reader whoever thou art I pray thee I pray thee as the Prophet did and say unto thee in his words O earth earth earth return return unto the Lord thy God and thou shalt find mercy his hand is not shortned his ear is not dull of hearing he is the same yesterday to day and for ever it is thy sins thy sins and only thy sins that separate between thee and thy God leave Ah leave then but thy sins and return unto the Lord and thou shalt find mercy and to our God who is full of Compassion Ah tast tast and see how good the Lord is and how gracious he will be unto thee if thou wilt leave and forsake thy filthy filthy sins though thou hast played the Prodigal and spent the stock of his Grace on Harlots and Strangers in a far Country yet Ah yet if thou wilt but return whilst he seeth thee yet afar off he will run towards thee to meet thee and fall on thy neck and kiss thee and kill for thee the fatted Calf and array thee with the best white Robes even with the Royal and most glorious Robes of his own only natural Son and thine Eldest Brother Christ Jesus he will delight in thee yea set his heart upon thee to do thee good and bring thee home to himself and give thee himself for thy Portion and make thee his own inheritance for ever 208. But I am perswaded that thou art fully perswaded that there is not so much sweetness in Jesus Christ as in the World nor his paths are not so pleasant and delightful as the ways of sin and therefore thou makest the World thy God and thy Christ and lovest it as thou should'st love God and Christ well the world and sin and its good and pleasures thou knowest well I desire only this one thing of thee that thou would'st labour to know Christ as well as thou knowest the world and sin serve him as many years as thou hast served them and if thou dost not find more sweet more beauty more pleasantness more delight more profit more advantage and more honour than in the world and sin return then to thine old Masters again and serve them but I promise and assure thee and will freely pawn thee my soul for surety that thou shalt gain more by serving Christ one year if that thou dost it as thou oughtest than by serving the world and sin all the days of thy lif 〈…〉 and if thou dost repent of thy bargain I will confess that I do deserve thy curses and not thy prayers thou shalt find thou shalt find that his ways are not strowed with Thorns and Thistles as thou supposest but with Odoriferous Roses and sweet perfumes as thou supposest not keep Ah keep faithfully thy Covenant with God and he will give thee much more than thou art able to ask than thou art able to think 209. Consider the service thou shalt do for God thou shalt by thy life if Godly perhaps bring home many to him for thy Companions heretofore in sin will have more regard to thee than unto others of the Godly and will now conclude that surely Gods ways are the most pleasant and delightsome seeing thou preferrest them and choosest and esteemest and praisest them above and more and beyond all the wayes of sin and this may cause them perhaps to make a tryal which if they do there is hopes for God will not be wanting on his part to shew them mercy if they desire it and seek it faithfully with all their hearts 210. If thou wilt then witness thy living and being risen with Christ seek the things that are above where Christ sitteth at the right hand of God set your affections on things above not on things on the earth let your hearts be where your treasure is for ye are dead and your life is hid with Christ in God put off Ah put off the old man with all his deeds and put on the new man which is renewed in knowledge and after the Image of him that Created him and as the Elect of God put on bowels of mercies kindness humbleness of mind meekness longsuffering forbearing one another and forgiving one another if any man hath a quarrel against any even as Christ forgave you so also do ye and above all these things put on Charity which is the bond of perfectness and let the peace of God rule in your hearts to the which also ye are called in one body and be ye thankful let the Word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another in Psalms and Hymns and spiritual Songs singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord and whatsoever ye do in word and deed do all in the name of the Lord Jesus giving thanks to God and the Father by him so then when Christ who is our life shall appear then shall ye also appear with him in glory 211. These are and I trust through Gods free grace in Jesus Christ shall ever be the longings and desires of the soul of my soul and the heart of my heart for all you that shall read it and for all the Israel of our God and I hope and shall pray the Lord in the infiniteness of his goodness to supply all my defects with the teachings and comforts of his own spirit who is the only teacher guider leader and Comforter Ah seek him then whil'st he may be found and God I hope will give him thee 212. Now the peace of God which passeth all understanding keep your hearts and minds in the knowledg and love of God and of his Son Jesus Christ our Lord and the blessing of God Almighty the Father the Son and the Holy Ghost be with you and dwell in your hearts abundantly to the praise and glory of his holy name the good of others and the comfort of your own Souls Now henceforth and for ever more Amen 213. I had much rather be the poorest in the World even a Job or a Lazarus O Lord for thy sake than the richest of the World yea than to have all the World for my own sake 214. For I have all that I would have when I have all that thou O Lord my God wilt have me to have 215. I esteem all even as nothing at all if it come not O Lord from thee all 216. Alas alas what and how much nothing is this Worlds all if we have not Christs all that is all Christ 217. Let me then O my sweet Jesus have all that thou hast and I will not care whether I have any thing at all of all that the World hath 218. He that hath Christ for his Christ is heir of all things and sure of all things but
heart wiâ— out untill thy locks were wet with the dewâ— â—aven and when I was most pitiless then â—'st thou most pity me and took'st me from â— self and out of the power of all my adverâ—ies and did'st enter with forceable possession â—o my heart there to lodge sup and dwell â— ever tho' thou foundest it to be more unâ—an then a dunghill and is not this enough â—cause all the Creatures in Heaven and Earth â— stand amazed and with wonder and aâ—ishment to admire the condescension of so great God as thou art Ah Lord God what could I more desire nay â—at couldst thou do more for me then thou hast â—e to bring me out of the death of sin to the â— of grace out of the suburbs of Hell into â— suburbs of Heaven methinks Ah me â—ks I may truely say out of Hell it self â— Heaven it self such a vast difference there â— such a blessed and glorious change there is â—eady blessed and ever magnified and praisâ—e thy ever blessed great and most gloriâ— name of Jehovah my strength and my â—tion Thou hast not only O Lord delivered me â— of the pawes of that roaring Lyon the â—il who had almost devoured me but hast â—en me of thine own power and strength to â— come him to trample him under my feet â— to despite him to his very face thou hast â—vered unto me his falseness and malice and the wickedness and the deceitfulness of my â— deceitfull wicked heart thâ—â— did thus beâ— me Ah Lord what can I such a poor wretcâ— I am render unto thee for all thy benefits I a worm and no man the greatest and â— chiefest of sinners the very worst of the â— of men O Lord accept of what I have to gâ— thee of these two poor mites my soul and bâ— true O Lord I confess and acknowledge â— they are not worthy to be put into thy â— Treasury but if thou wilt be pleased to stâ— on them the glorious Image of thy Son Jâ— Christ I am sure they will pass for our â—coyn in thy Heavenly Court and thou â— own self wilt esteem them of thy peculiar Tâ— sure O Lord set me as a seal upon thy â— and let thy love be setled upon mine tâ— may be out of love with all that I may beâ—ly in love with thee and let all my menâ— and faoulties be but as instruments to act holy and blessed motions Ah Lord God good as great and greâ— good when wilt thou by thine Almighty pâ—utterly destroy and root out all sin out of me â— shall the time O Lord come that it shaâ— Crucified unto me and I unto it when shalâ— time come that I shall see it no more when the time come that thou wilt O Lord givâ— a finall Victory over it and totally destrâ— â—hen Lord shall come that blessed day whereâ— I shall not sin when I shall put off sin as an â— garment and never more put it on when â— tears fears sighs and groans for sins â—ll be expell'd and extinguished when thou O â—rd my sweet and blessed Jesus shalt only be â— all and my all But grant good Lord though sin be in my â—rt that my heart be not in sin and though â— rule over me as a Tyrant let it Ah let it â—ver raign in me a moment as a Soveraign â—d though I cannot live without sin yet good â—rd for thy goodness sake let me live without â—senting unto delighting in or approving of â—y sin whatsoever either in thought word or â—d but let there be always and continually in â— a heedfull watchfull carefull circumâ—ct care though temptations fall on me let â— not fall into temptation but deliver me â—m all evill O thou my Father which art in â—aven and cause me to work out my Salvaâ—n with fear and trembling and to labour â—re and more to make my calling and election â—e before I go hence and be no more seen And knowing Lord that thou hast in the â—ndance of thy love and mercy provided for â— a Kingdom which cannot be shaken let me â—ve grace in my heart to come before thee and worship thee the true God wâ—â—h reverence â—d godly fear that I may always run and not grow weary and walk and not faint wâ— O Lord all thy Laws of grace in my hâ— and thy Statutes of Love in my mind by finger of thy holy and blessed Spirit that I never go astray to the right hand of pleasâ— or to the left hand of profits wean me O Lâ— from the world e're thou take me out of world and whilst I do live in the world me be dead to it and to all the things of which are the honours riches and pleaâ— thereof the lust of the flesh the lust of the and the pride of life and give me those thâ— and those things only which may make thine and onely thine that I may be alâ— thine and ever thine Teach me O Lord to use the world â— I used it not that I may not abuse it my nor thee who hast given it me to use but â— abuse give me O Lord I humbly beseech in Jesus Christ grace to be always minâ— of my last end and of the reckoning thâ— must make before thee the judge of Heâ— and Earth take away all my doubts â— and cares for the things of this life that I cast all my care on thee who carest for for the earth is thine and the fulness tâ— of grant O Lord that I may know hoâ— want and how to abound and to be alâ— content in all conditions knowing that things shall be for my greatest good and â—ugh affliction be in the night yet joy shall me in the morning grant O Lord I beseech â—ee that my last thoughts may be my best â—ughts and my last days O Lord my best â—ys grant O Lord that I may be willing lose all to gain thee and to esteem it no loss â—t great gain grant that I may be willing to â—crease that thou maist O Lord increase to â—nd and to be spent for thee and to follow â—ee the Lamb of Righteousness wheresoever â—ou goest grant that I may be as willing to â—ear the Crown of Thorns to obey thee here the Crown of Glory to praise thee hereafter â—d grant O Lord that I may be as willing suffer for thy glory as to raign with thee in â—ory and that I may desire Heaven much â—ore for thee then thee for Heaven Ah Lord I could be content with Mary to â—t at thy feet and to wash them with my tears â—nd to stand behind thee being altogether aâ—amed to come before thee how willingly â— Lord how willingly do I with Jeremy wish â—hat my head were a Fountain of water that â—ine eyes might gush out Rivers of Tears and Ah that I could with David weep continually with Magdalen abundantly and with â—eâ—er bitterly that I might give my soul no rest â—ntill I come into thy blessed Arms the blesâ—ed joyfull
and all his glory in Heaven face to face with spiritual eyes yea with the eyes of his own Holy Spirit 15. And if our Joys be so great to hear of him here with the hearing of the ears Ah how great shall they be to be with him hereafter and to hear himself with an understanding heart 16. And if then our Joys be so great to enjoy him here on earth and but in part imperfectly Ah how great shall our joys and delights be to enjoy him in Heaven not in part but in perfection perfectly fully wholly and holy as he is 17. And if our Joys be so great here on earth in the midst of fears Ah how great shall they be in Heaven where we need fear no fears for that there are no fears there to fear 18. And if our Joys be here on earth so great though surrounded with many sorrows Ah how great shall they be in Heaven when and where all sorrows shall be all done away and turned into fulness of Joy 19. And if our Joys be so great among so many displeasing displeasures even here â—n earth Ah how great shall they be in Heaven when and where all displeasures shall all be done away and our pleasures be for evermore 20. Ah fill me then O my good God with thy blessed most blessed self and thy Joys alone that in thee only I may rejoyce 21. If the nether Springs on Earth be so sweet Ah how delicious and sweet yea sweetly delicious O God are the upper Springs of Heaven in Heaven 22. If thy left-hand mercies O God be so delightful and do so much delight and please us Ah how much more shall those of thy right-hand delight us with pleasure 23. If his foot-stool favours be so great and we esteem our selves greatly favoured by them to have them Ah how great in favour yea what great favorites shall we be when we shall enjoy in Heaven the favours of his Throne and sit on Thrones by him 24. If to see a glimpse of his glory beauty and brightness here on earth do so ravish us with delight joy and admiration so as we could and would always be content to behold it Ah how then shall our hearts be ravisht with that ravishing fulness of his bright beautifull glory when we shall in Heaven behold all his glory as he is in his Kingdom of glory with all his glorious Saints and Angels from whose beautiful brightness and glory they have all their glorious brightness and beauty and are made thus gloriously beautiful with surpassing beauty and glory being in all things made like unto him 25. If then his glory be so sweet in the bud what is it in the branch but Ah then how much greater and sweeter is the Tree that hath so many branches 26. If then so great and sweet on earth Ah how greatly great and sweet in Heaven 27. And if our delights be so great in seeking thee O God here below on earth Ah how incomprehenslbly great shall they and will they be when we shall have found thee where thou art above in Heaven 28. And seeing O God thou givest us such wages her whilst we offend thee Ah how great shall they be yea what is there but thou wilt give us when we shall offend thee no more but always please thee 29. And seeing our Heaven is so sweet on earth or our earthly Heaven so sweet which is but to see thy back part by Faith darkly as in a glass Ah how sweet yea how much sweeter shall our heavenly Heaven be or our Heaven in Heaven which is to know thee as thou art O God to be known and see thee clearly and plainly even face to face 30. And seeing thy love O God is so great to us here as it constraineth us to love thee Ah how great shall it be to us there when without constraint our greatest joy and pleasure shall be to adore and love thee 31. Ah Lord God that knowest my heart thou knowest that all the desires of my heart yea that the soul of my soul and the heart of my heart desires to love thee only and to serve thee with all my whole heart 32. If thy name O Lord be so great and fearful unto those that know thee and that know that thou lovest them Ah how fearfully great and greatly fearful shall it be unto those that know thee not but yet know thy greatness and how greatly thou hatest them 33. All Glory only Glory and continually Glory be given unto God the God and giver of all gifts grace and Glory A Prayer THe Scope Sum Contents and my intent in this following Prayer is to beseech the Lord to be always graciously present with me to watch over me and to give me in Jesus Christ and for his sake merits and worthiness his own holy and blessed Spirit to lead direct guide and govern me in all things that I shall take in hand to do to change my old heart and give me a New that I may glorifie him by a holy life and conversation all the rest of my days and especially in this place where I have so much so often and so grievously sinned against his great and holy name and walkt contrary unto him serving the Devil and obeying his lusts worlds lusts and self lusts casting his holy and divine Commandments behind my back and trampling his Precepts under my feet and that he would be pleased with me to bring home all his Elect suddenly into his Kingdom of grace here and of glory hereafter that his whole and holy will may be done by us here on earth as it is done in Heaven until he shall be pleased through the infiniteness and incomprehensibleness of the riches of his free grace love and mercy in Jesus Christ to bring us into the Holy of Holies the Heaven of Heavens even into his blessed self there for ever and for ever to sing that ever blessed ditty sweet Angelical and Eternal Song of Hallelujah of Praise Thanksgiving and Glory unto his ever blessed most great gracious and glorious name So be it Lord So be it O Lord God of Heaven and Earth most high most great and most glorious the Creator Preserver and Governor of all things who hast created all things by the word of thy power by thee only they are and were created thou willest all that thou dost and dost all that thou wilt thou O God that art the only God for there is none else there is none besides thee the God of Abraham of Isaac and of Jacob that wast with the Children of Israel in Egypt and on the Red Sea with Moses in the Wilderness with Joseph in Prison with Daniel in the Lyons den with the three Children in the fiery Furnace and with Abraham in a strange Land be with me also O God in Jesus Christ be with me also thy poor unworthy Creature and servant in this strange Land sinful place and Nation whither thou hast by
Lord to know that thou art a God pardoning all Iniquities Transgressions and sins yea all Blasphemies wherewith they have blasphemed Ah Lord shew them the light of thy gracious and glorious Countenance and lead them in the way everlasting that they may never more swerve nor go astray from thy Divine and Holy Commandments Bless O Lord all that are travelling by Sea or by Land and bring them to their Ports and Places in safety defend them from all Pirats and Robbers that seek to do them hurt or wrong and from all other perils and dangers pitch thy tents O Lord round about them and keep them even as thou keepest thine own And lastly O Lord I most humbly and heartily beg and beseech thee in Jesus Christ to pardon and forgive all mine Enemies all the world over love them O Lord that hate me bless them that curse me do good to them that seek to do me evil forget and forgive all that they have done or would have done against me and change their hearts from evil unto good that they may no longer walk after the deceitfulness of their own evil Hearts but may do all things for the time to come in truth and sincerity according to thine own heart O Lord God that thou mayest own them for thy own and give them hearts O Lord to forgive me whom I have wronged whether it have been in thought word or deed either unto high or low rich or poor young or old and grant O Lord that I may fear and do so no more but as thou hast been unto me a sin-pardoning God so I beseech thee be unto me a sin-preventing God that I may not as the Dog return to his Vomit nor as the Sow to her wallowing in the mire again but that I may always henceforth set thee O Lord before mine eyes and be attent unto the motions of thy holy spirit and never to forget thy exceeding bountifull and mercifull dealings towards me and that love in Jesus Christ wherewith thou hast loved me and that I may remember that it is impossible for those who were once enlightned and have tasted of the Heavenly gift and were made partakers of the Holy Ghost and have tasted the good word of God and the Powers of the World to come if they shall fall away to renew them again unto Repentance seeing they Crucifie to themselves the Son of God afresh and put him to open shame for if we sin wilfully after that we have received the knowledge of the truth there remaineth no more sacrifice for sin but a certain fearfull looking for of Judgment and fiery indignation which shall devour the adversaries for having Lord by thy grace and mercy escaped the pollutions of the world through the knowledge of the Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ grant that I may not again be intangled therein and overcome and so my latter end prove worse if worse it can be than was my beginning Ah Lord God should such be my case which God forbid it would be much better for me that I had never known the way of Righteousness than after the knowledge of it to turn from thy holy Commandments delivered unto me Ah Lord God my Lord and my God in Jesus Christ thou knowest my weakness frailty and impotency that I cannot of my self as of my self think a good thought that I am prone to all evil and averse to all good to will indeed is many times present but how to perform I know not there is still O Lord God a law in my members warring against the law of my mind and leading me Captive into the law of sin Ah Lord when when O Lord when shall that time come and that blessed most blessed and glorious day dawn and appear in my heart that the root and branch of sin be totally rooted up and utterly destroyed and grace confirmed and grow up more and more until I come to be a perfect man in Christ Jesus that I may still more and more hate the evil which I do and love the good which I do not and cannot do that it may be no longer I that sin but sin that dwelleth in me and that by the assistance of thy grace and holy Spirit I may walk well pleasing before thee doing thy work and thy will here on earth as it is done in Heaven living the life of grace here and of glory hereafter the life of the Righteous that I may dye their death Ah Lord give thy self to me that I may give my self to thee live in me that I may live to thee owne me for thine own that I may owne thee for mine all give me Ah give me O Lord much grace that I may give thee much glory daily grace that I may give thee daily glory continually grace that I may give thee continually glory that I may be all thine O Lord only thine always thine and ever thine and all this I most humbly and unfeignedly beg of thee and whatever else thou knowest to be needfull or expedient for me both for my soul and body for the name and for the worthiness of Jesus Christ thy Son and my Saviour to whom with thy Glorious Majesty and Holy Spirit of Grace do I render and give with my whole heart as all due is and unto none else Honour Glory Power Might Majesty Dominion and Thanksgiving now henceforth and for evermore Amen Amen 34. If the love of Creatures be so lovely unto us and we esteem and love them most for their love and this their love doth many times sweetly satisfie and ravish our senses But how then are our hearts set on fire with Love when we have within us the fiery hot burning Love of a Loving God yea of a God of Love whose Love is so lovely as it knits our hearts in Love unto him and our greatest Love unto him is from his own Love because he hath so loved us as to give us hearts to love him even according to his own heart 35. If our Joy be according to the measure of Love which we enjoy from the Creature whom we most love Ah how great yea incomprehensibly great shall our joy be when we shall know and feel that we are beloved above measure by the Creator who maketh the Creature thus lovely and giveth him Love thus to love him 36. If our Love many times be so great unto the Creature for the Creature that we do not and it seems to us that we cannot love him so much as we would and do desire to do and we crave and desire chiefly his Love that we may yet love him more and this from and because we love him so much and for that our senses can be only satisfied with his Love and by loving of him for we love him most for his Love and his Love doth cause us to love him more whom we love so much yea whom we love most 37. But Ah how great then yea how wonderfully great is the
with this Spirit for the peace tranquillity serenity and comfort of thy Spirit for the life and living of thy Spirit to please delight fill full satisfie and resatiate the appetite of the Soul even as the body hungreth and desireth rejoyceth and delighteth in food to please its fleshly appetite what if we could or did O Lord eat thy very body and blood that would not fill or feed our Souls which are not fed with meat and drink corporally but spiritually and what matters it O Lord as for me I care not what I eat or drink as to the outward man so I may eat and drink by faith in the Spirit and my inward man may be filled with the Spirit whether the body live or dye as for the bodies sake I care not though the body be hunger starved it shall for sure I am it will be well content if the Spirit be thus fed and filled with the presence breathings and Communion of thy Spirit 't is not Ah Lord 't is not thou well knowest the Quails and Mannah from Heaven nor thy body and blood corporally but spiritually that my Soul longeth for and my heart desireth and panteth after so that it even fainteth for lack of it Ah give me that or else I dye I dye indeed corporally spiritually and eternally from which deaths O Lord by thine own death I trust I hope I believe and am confidently assured that thou hast delivered me and wilt deliver me by giving me this Heavenly food of thy holy Spirit to live in thee for thee and to thee here by grace and hereafter in glory this is my belief O Lord increase my Faith strengthen it and comfort it more and more by thine own Spirits living raigning and ruling in my heart by causing it willingly cheerfully and perseveringly to walk in thy ways doing thy will with sincerity integrity and uprightness in thought word and deed both towards thee and towards all men for ever and for ever 56. He that maketh wagers usually coveteth if not always therefore surely it's best to forbear 57. Ah Lord keep me from coveting any other thing than thy self and thy holy and blessed Spirit to teach me lead me direct me guide and govern me my heart and affections to walk in all thy holy ways and to keep all thy Commandments all my days 58. For worldly covetings after the things of this World keep our thoughts hearts memories and affections from seeking with coveting desires the things of Heaven or Heavenly things 59. Let me covet thee O Lord ever ever But all things or any thing out of thee never 60. Let my love be to love thee my delight to delight thee my care O Lord let it be to please thee my groanings to go after thee in thy ways and let all my joys be to rejoyce in thee and thy praise and to praise thee O Lord my Lord always 61. Ah suffer me not in other to spend my days But thus uprightly to walk in all thy ways 62. Covetings for the World makes the affections of the heart to affect the World but covetings for and after Heaven makes the heart and all the affections thereof to affect Heaven and the things in Heaven with a heavenly heart 63. Covetings for the World makes the heart earthly but covetings for Heaven makes the heart heavenly 64. Covetings after God makes the heart God-like according to his heart covetings after any thing out of God or besides God makes the heart ungodly that is ungodlike and contrary to his heart 65. Covetings after the flesh makes the heart fleshly or a heart in the flesh Covetings after the Spirit makes the heart spiritual yea a heart living in God's Spirit 66. I suppose that if a man love at times unlawfully lusting after strange flesh only with the flesh that is desires and would their Loves with the flesh but not with the will and mind which is the heart though the flesh saith yea and yields if the Spirit saith nay and yields not and doth much more ardently and vehemently desire and would not their Loves then the flesh doth and would their Loves and the Spirit that is their inward man would much rather have the hatred than their loves and hath sincere hatred and dislike to this Love by the flesh faithfully truly ardently and continually it is not he that sins but Sin that dwelleth in him for though with his flesh he serve the Law of sin please the flesh yet he hates detests and abhors the evil which he doth and with his mind he serves the Law of God God's Law is written in his heart and remains engraven still in the inner man on all his affections 67. As to me I willingly most willingly would if it might be love none but my God alone 68. True Lord true it is the outward man that is the flesh desireth and delighteth in the things of the flesh because it is fleshly as the inner man the heart of the Soul and the Soul of the heart and all the faculties thereof delighteth and rejoyceth in the things of the Spirit because it is spiritual 69. I have no Heaven here Lord because my Heaven is in thee and yet I have a Heaven Lord here because thou that art Heaven art here and in me 70. Above all keepings keep O Lord O Lord keep my heart my poor heart from sin from choosing delighting approving countenancing or maintaining Sin 71. But this is not all no Lord no thou knowest it 's to be thy servant to work thy work to do thy will not for my self as for thy self not for my praise applause or honour but for thine for I could not be satisfied though I had all I would have unless I do all that for which thou hast created me and appointed me to do 72. 'T is not Ah 't is not the Corn Wine and Oyl of the World the honurs riches and pleasures thereof 't is not the hony of Earth but Heavens hony that my Soul desireth to tast and ever to feed upon 73. If I had and were ever sure to have all the satisfaction that ever Creature had and I had thee not O my God for my Portion as I firmly believe I have I should and would account my self of all men on Earth the most miserable 74. I would not give the part and Portion that I have at present in my God for all this Worlds good for all its honours riches and pleasures 75. Ah Lord how much nothing doth all things seem to be when compared to thee 76. Faith hope and love in thee and for thee O Lord is more worth than all things else that can be given that is not of thee 77. Who is able or can express the satisfactions of that Soul unto whom thou hast given Love cordial faithful sincere and persevering Love to love thee 78. Ah how sweet a thing is it to serve the Lord Ah how pleasant and delightsome to walk always in all his ways
and to do his will willingly 79. Ah Lord my only grief and trouble is because I keep not thy Laws and for that I have not regard to thy Commandments as I would 80. Ah that I were even as a barren wilderness to bear no fruit for my self and as a dry Spring to give no refreshment to my self to my own self that is my flesh Ah that I were as it were liveless and loveless to my self that I might only live to love and adore thee my God my God 81. What is my life or my self if it be not spent for thee and what are all my daies if I walk not only and altogether that is always in all thy ways 82. Were it not and would it not be much better for me that I were not and that I never had been if I be not O Lord thine and if I live not to thee and for thee to thy praise and for thine honour and glory 83. Beautiful are all thy ways O God they are most yea they are only desireable 84. He that walketh in them without wavering turning aside or going astray shall assuredly at last come to his journeys end to his long home to that harbour and haven of rest happiness eternal felicity and blessedness 85. To think on any thing out of or besides God brings no true solace joy savour or content 86. But to think on him as we ought how easily and quietly doth it dispel all other thoughts making us to see them as they are naked empty nothing 87. Thoughts on God fill the soul with joy delight and pleasure above and as it were even beyond end and measure 88. Good thoughts if they did no other good than keep out evil thoughts were they are they not to be accounted prized and valued as a great good 89. Thy presence O Lord at all times filleth me with all delights and pleasures and thy absence emptieth me even of all 90. When I have thee O Lord I have all I would have Ah but when I want thee I want all even all that my soul desireth that it doth love or crave 91. As I have and according as I have thee O Lord God so are my joys and according as I want thee so are my sorrows and grief 92. Thy drawing near doth not only comfort me and satisfie me but also ravish me But at thy departure or absence ah Lord thou knowest thou knowest how my heart quaketh trembleth and is full of doubts cares and fears 93. I cannot O Lord thou knowest I cannot live without the presence of thy holy Spirit who is my only comfort or comforter for when I want thee O Lord I want all good things yea I account nothing good 94. It is not the world that I long for or care for it is not O Lord the nether but the upper springs not the left-hand mercies but the right-hand not the footstool but the Throne favours that I esteem favours and mercies indeed 95. O Lord my Lord and my God do thou I beseech thee so possess my heart that I may only be possest with thee 96. O Lord be thou pleased so to live in me that I may only and always live to thee and for thee 97. Give O Lord give so thy self to me as I may give my self to thee 98. When I want thee my God who art my all and my only good I want all even all But when I have thee O Lord thou knowest my heart saith it hath all it hath all it hath all I would have all that it doth think on or desire or crave 99. How much nothing O Lord is all other things to thee And how much above all things O Lord art thou to me 100. Give me then thy self O Lord my Lord and I will always chearfully say I have all and that I desire nothing else at all but unless thou dost O Lord my God give me thy self thy only and thy very very self thou knowest that all things seem to me and are esteemed by me even as nothing as dirt as dung as dross 101. Thou knowest O God my God that I cannot live without thee and I desire only to live to live in thee to thee and for thee 102. Ah that I were dead to all things and all things dead to me that I might only be alive to thee 103. Oh that all things would take themselves wings and fly from me that I might not be kept back from flying up to thee my God my God 104. In thee O Lord there is true rest a rest of peace in truth but out of thee O God there is no rest for the soal of the foot of my soul 105. I cannot rest but on thy breast I cannot live but in thy Love I cannot walk but in thy way I cannot joy but in thy day I cannot run but unto thee I cannot see but only thee I cannot joy but in thy love I am not well but when above O God my God take me to thee That no other I ever see For seeing thee I see that all That ever was and ever shall That glorious Sun that blessed light That shews to go by day and night That giveth all things unto all That ever were and ever shall To thee O God and thy Great Name Be ever praise laud and great fame From this time forth for ever more Thy self thy love I will adore 106. How sweet O God Oh God how sweet are thy Sweets 107. Oh happy condition to enjoy thee O God whatever my condition be 108. O Heavenly heart that is always in Heaven meditating on thee God the Heaven of Heaven in Heaven 109. Oh happy he that hath always Heaven in his mind that minds only Heaven and the things that are in Heaven 110. Such Ah such a heart O Lord who art the Lord of Heaven and Earth give me that my heart may be according to thine own heart yea that my heart may be in thine and thine in mine that thou mayest O Lord God so empty thy self into me that I may for ever and for ever be emptied into thee and filled by thee with thee 111. O Ocean of all goodness continue to shower into me the abundant showers yea floods of thine infinite good even as thou hast heretofore many many ah many times done that I may rejoyce and be glad in them as well when I have them not and feel them not as when I feel I have them 112. Ah Lord my Soveraign Lord and God my Superior and Supream good the good that is only able to glad me and to make me rejoyce fill me Ah fill me O Lord with these goods and good things that flow out continually from thee that I may see thy goodness thy beauty and thy glory as in thy Sanctuary 113. Ah the true satisfactory soul-ravishing Joys to enjoy thee O God and those Joys that thou givest away away far from me all earthly Joys earths Joys for ye are but earth and
the children of God rather than commit the pleasures of sin for a season rather than in the least displease thy Christ thy Jesus thy God thy good thy Saviour and thy Redeemer for a moment much rather by much suffer the afflictions due to sin than sin and suffer no affliction for surely a Saints greatest affliction is sin sin is the very worst of Hell to him that makes God his best Heaven the Heaven of Heaven in Heaven 98. Dost thou feel thy heart heartily to long for the knowledge of God and all his ways to love fear serve honour and obey him And dost thou find that all that thou dost is nothing to what thou would'st and desirest and longest to do Thy very best is too too bad thy most holy things are too too unholy and all thine all even nothing at all thou art altogether ashamed of thy self that thou art what thou art and abhorrest thy self in dust and ashes accounting thy self as thou art in thy self the vilest of Creatures the greatest of sinners and the very worst of the worst of men 99. And this causeth in thee sorrow shame grief and astonishment wondring that such a God should love such a man such a worm such a wretch such a miscreant such a dog such a sinnner yea such a devil as thou art in thy self Dost thou thus condemn thy self loath and abhor thy self and art thus truly angry with thy self and ashamed of thy self and of all thy doings and marvellest how thou canst find acceptance at such a glorious Throne of grace and gracious Throne of Glory and that God hath had so long patience and that he did not cut thee off long ago and give thee thy portion with thy brethren in Iniquity Whoremongers Drunkards Prophaners of the Sabbath with the Covetous Proud Boasters Malicious Raylers False accusers c. even with the devil and his angels and that thou dost esteem it a Heaven that thou art not now in Hell giving continual Glory to God in Christ that thou wert not consumed and cut off long ago and that he hath not given only space to repent but also grace to repent from all and every sin in thought word and deed even with repentance unto life never to be repented of 100. And if thus thou art in sincere truth I say if in truth and sincerity these or the like be thy desires endeavours life and living end and aim habitually continually and universally then art thou what thou shouldst be and what God would have thee to be assure thy self thy heart is upright clean pure holy and perfect even according to Gods own holy heart thou art a man in Christ a member of Christ and surely surely Christ will assuredly own thee for his own and always love thee and live in thee even as he doth in his own as he doth to those in whom he liveth and whom he loveth and thy life shall henceforth be hid with Christ in God so that when he shall appear at his second and sudden coming in glory thou shalt also appear with him to his eternal glory and thine everlasting comfort joy and eternal salvation 101. And therefore O man of God child of God son of God and servant of the eternal and ever living God chear up thy self and rejoyce yea I say evermore rejoyce for God is thy God and thy Father thy Portion thy Lot and thine Inheritance thou art surely his and he is as surely thine and Christ Jesus will be also thine all all thine the way the truth and the life to bring thee unto and give the possession of eternal life life eternal which he hath prepared for thee by his death and is preparing thee for it by his life for he lives to make continual intercession for thee the holy Spirit of grace the Sanctifier and the Comforter is thine he will guide thee lead thee direct thee keep thee and preserve thee unto the end even in the ways of all holiness and righteousness of peace joy comfort and consolation which are the foretasts and fore-sights of eternal life and salvation the very beginnings of the beatifical Vision of glory in glory and of those ravishing joys and pleasures prepared and laid up for the Just before the beginning of the world was which are such as eye hath not seen as ear hath not heard neither hath it ever entred into the heart of any man at any time to conceive being much ah much above all that we can ask or think for there we shall ever possess and enjoy all joys unspeakable joys yea fulness of all joys and pleasures for evermore even God himself Father Son and Holy Ghost who is all in all and in all the blessed to him alone be eternally given all Honour Glory Power Might Majesty Dominion and Thanksgiving now and for ever and ever Amen Amen 102. None but the true children of God can truly love Gods children they that are his will love those that are his chiefly and most because they are his and those most that appear to be his most and those dearliest that are his dearest 103. I will much more more by much rejoyce in an obedient heart to submit unto and to do the whole and holy will of God in all cases conditions and places than to enjoy the wisdom of Solomon and all the honours riches delights and pleasures of the whole world 104. Ah Lord let my heart never be at rest until I find that it doth most willingly freely joyfully and choosingly submit and acquiesce unto all that God will be it what it will and to say of all things and in all conditions so would I have it 105. There is surely nothing so delightful unto the heart of a true Christian as to do the whole will of God holily and heartily as to please him by a sincere hearty and cheerful obedience universally 106. Ah the joys the joys the true joys the great joys yea the unspeakable joys the peace the peace the comfort the comfort the solace and the rest and quiet that is in the heart of him that feareth always from love for it destroys all servile fear and causeth such joy and gladness as passeth all understanding 107. What ah what honour is there like that as truly and sincerely to honour God! What pleasure ah what pleasure like that as always to please God! What joy ah what joy like that as always to enjoy God! What happiness ah what happiness like that comparable to that as to know him to be ours and we to be his What peace ah what peace like that as when we know our peace to be made with the God of peace through and by Jesus Christ the King and Prince of peace witnessed unto us by the continual indwelling in us of the Spirit of peace the Sanctifier of our souls and the Comforter of our hearts Ah what comfort what comfort like unto that as to find our selves in God and that great good God to be
Kindness and the other of our own desperate badness unkindness ingratitude and misery Thus even thus me thinks we should always be all the day long all our days unto the very end of our lives 6. According as is our Spiritual warfare within us so is our peace if there be an universal war in all the faculties of the Soul and members of the body against all sin then and only then do we enjoy peace true peace full peace and perfect peace Wherefore make first a Covenant with thine eyes that they gaze not abroad nor look irregularly or wantonly Secondly with thine ears that thou take no pleasure but avoid to hear all vain idle foolish or sinful talk Thirdly with thine hands that they touch no unclean thing that is that they serve not as an instrument at any time to do any evil Fourthly with thy feet that they carry thee not to do the thing at any time that is not altogether right in Gods sight and esteem Fifthly with thy tongue that thou speak not vainly lightly idly foolishly hurtfully slanderously or sinfully But that which shall honour thy God edifie thee here and comfort thine own soul and give thee joy in the day of the Lord Jesus Christ Sixthly with thy mind that thou mind only the things of God and what are according to his mind Seventhly with thy heart that thou love not seek not choose not prize not any other thing than what is according to Gods heart Eightly with all thy affections to love what God loveth and to hate what God hateth and as he loveth and hateth them in sincerity and truth continually Ninthly and lastly but not the least with thy thoughts to suffer no evil vain idle foolish gadding worldly affection to settle it self there a moment keep out all things thence but thy God and the serious thoughts of his goodness and of thine own badness of his mercy and of thine own misery of his Heaven and of thine own Hell of his glory and of thine own shame of his beauty and of thine own deformity and ugliness of his light and of thine own darkness of his fulness and of thine own emptiness of his fruitfulness and of thine own barrenness of his power and of thine own weakness of his Wisdom and of thine own foolishness of his Patience and of thine own frowardness and peevishness in a word of his riches which is above all over all and more than all things much by much either in Heaven above or Earth beneath and of thine own despicable poverty and nothingness at all only a sinful nothing or nothing but sin 7. If thus thou endeavourest to keep out all things but God and his ways out of all thy thoughts always thou shalt I promise thee live such a peaceable quiet comfortable sanctified holy blessed life as is unutterable unexpressible for as thy thoughts are so will be thy comforts or discomforts thy joys and rejoycings or thy reproaches and bewaylings Do thou thus draw near to God and thou shalt find him and feel him and perceive him and see him to draw near unto thee by his graces here which will bring thee to possess himself his Heaven and his Glory for ever hereafter 8. God doth not give us such a measure of grace here to free us altogether from our Corruptions infirmities and failings for these two ends as I conceive first that we be not lifted up above measure as we should be and think our selves to be something and that we are cloathed and rich and full God knoweth that it is better for us to see our poverty nakedness and emptiness that we may be Inheritors with the Saints in life of all the promises both of things present and to come And not to be shut out of them with the evil Angels and have our Portion in the Lake of fire and Brimstone world without end Again secondly If thus we did live at our hearts ease always without temptations failings or falls we should surely with Peter foolishly make Tabernacles here and not care for any other Heaven for indeed it would be a Heaven But not Ah not such a Heaven as our God hath prepared and provided for us above where we shall see him as he is to be seen and know him as he is to be known If we had here all that we would have or could desire and crave we should not with holy Heavenly enlightned Saint Paul desire to be dissolved and to be with Christ which as he said well truely and divinely was much better by much yea best of all And if we were not at times tempted how should we manifest the gifts and graces of Gods spirit in us as now through grace we do by our fightings strivings struglings wrestlings contendings in the heat of Zeal and fire of fervent love in truth to keep our selves as valiant Combatant◠〈…〉 holy Lists of his Divine and blessed Laws and ways not flinching at all or drawing back in the least or moving a foot But standing it out to the very last breath against all our spiritual Enemies and Adversaries within and without of Devils Lusts worlds Lusts and fleshly Lusts and Corruptions And here by constant and faithful engagements in this holy war in this spiritual combate in this Angelical fight for the honour and glory of the Eternal God the King of Kings and Lord of lords we are confirmed assured strengthned and setled by the whispers and sweet voice of his holy spirit within us to our Souls and Consciences that we shall in due time be made through his strength and continual assistance more than Conquerors and shall at last sit down and rest in peace Triumphantly with the Patriarchs Prophets Apostles Martyrs and Saints wearing for ever the Crown of Victory and Glory in Glory and be arrayed with the long white robes of Christs righteousness worthiness merits and obedience and ever live with him and his bliss enjoying for ever and ever his presence his Heaven yea himself who is the bliss of all bliss the Top and Crown of all joy the Heaven of Heaven in Heaven and the glory beauty splendor and sublimit◠of Glory in Glory 9. See then and consid 〈…〉 ess and muc◠better doth God deal with us and carve to us than we can or would for our selves how much Ah how much better is he to u◠and for us then we would be to and for our selves how much more over and above hath he prepared for us and will surely give us than we are able to ask than we are able to think wherefere let us learn to let him alone and pray him to deal with us and do for us as seemeth him good and always say in all things so Lord so would I have it seeing thou wilt have it so 10. I also conceive that God suffers us to fall at times for this end or the like that by our fall we may learn and be made to stand the faster to rise the higher