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A84357 Tears of repentance: or, A further narrative of the progress of the Gospel amongst the Indians in New-England: setting forth, not only their present state and condition, but sundry confessions of sin by diverse of the said Indians, wrought upon by the saving power of the Gospel; together with the manifestation of their faith and hope in Jesus Christ, and the work of grace upon their hearts. Related by Mr. Eliot and Mr. Mayhew, two faithful laborers in that work of the Lord. Published by the corporation for propagating the Gospel there, for the satisfaction and comfort of such as wish well thereunto. Eliot, John, 1604-1690.; Mayhew, Thomas.; Mather, Richard, 1596-1669. 1653 (1653) Wing E524; Thomason E697_16; ESTC R207106 52,811 83

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on unto it with many fears and questions what they should do when they should be a Church When therefore I saw the Lord by the Counsel of his Servants which is an holy reverend Ordinance of Christ and by his Providence denying me the help of all Interpreters having many witnesses how much care and pains I took every way I knew to be supplied therein and that the work it self was extended by the Lords gracious inlarging them in their Confessions so that the day was not sufficient to accomplish it I say when I saw the Lord speaking that delatory word I cannot express what a load it took off my heart and I did gladly follow the Lord therein yea and I bless the Lord for that day that it was carried so far as it was for the cause of Christ hath many waies gained by it many hundreds of the precious Saints being much comforted and confirmed in their hopes of this work of Christ among them and their faith and prayers much quickned by what they heard and saw And because all witnesses failed me let me say but this I began and have followed this work for the Lord according to the poor measure of grace received not for base ends I have been true faithful unto their souls and in writing and reading their Confessions I have not knowingly or willingly made them better than the Lord helped themselves to make them but am verily perswaded on good grounds that I have rather rendered them weaker for the most part than they delivered them partly by missing some words of weight in some Sentences partly by my short and curt touches of what they more fully spake and partly by reason of the different Idioms of their Language and ours Now follow those Preparitory Confessions which were read before the Elders most of them The first that made a publick Confession and was took in Writing was Peter a Ruler of Ten among them a Godly man who quickly after he had made this Confession fell sick and died and now injoyeth the fruit of his Faith the end of his Hope the salvaion of his Soul among the Blessed where I am perswaded he shall be found in the great day His Confession was as followeth VVHen I first prayed to God I did not fear God but I feared perdition because the English had told me that all should be damned that call not upon God But now I know that God made all the world and I fear him now I beleeve that which you teach is true Now I beleeve that God calleth us to Natik that here we may be ruled by God and gather a Church now I beleeve that it is Gods Command that we should labor Six dayes and keep the Sabbath on the Seventh day now my heart is greatly abased for all my sins for we see though we pray to God we are ready to offend each other and be angry with each other and that we love not each other as we should do and for this I grieve my heart crieth now I remember that God saith thou shalt not lust but before I prayed to God I was full of lusts God saith We must have but one Wife and at first did make but one man and one woman but I followed many women God saith Remember to keep the Sabbath day holy but I did hunt or shoot or any thing on the Sabbath day many other sins I committed but now I see them and wil cast them away because they are vile and God forbiddeth them when I prayed first my sins were not pardoned for my praying is worth nothing now I am humbled and mourn for my sins and yet cannot deliver my self nor get pardon therfore I trust Christ with my soul The next Confession was made by John Speene as followeth His first confession was this WHen I first prayed to God I did not pray for my soul but only I did as my friends did because I loved them and though I prayed to God yet I did not fear sin nor was I troubled at it I heard that when good men die their souls go to God and are there happy but I cannot say that I beleeved it Afterward my heart run away into the country after our old wayes and I did almost cast off praying to God A little while after that I saw that I had greatly sinned and then I saw all my sins afore I prayed to God and since I prayed to God and I saw that God was greatly angry for them and that I cannot get pardon for them but yet my heart saith I will pray to God as long as I live I thought God would not pardon me and yet I would cast away my sins I did greatly love hunting and hated labor but now I beleeve that word of God which saith Six dayes thou shalt labor and God doth make my body strong to labor John Speene This Confession being short in some main points he afterward made Confession as followeth WHen I first prayed I prayed not for my soul but for the sake of men I loved men and for their sakes I prayed to God Before I prayed many were my sins and my heart was heaped full and ran over in all manner of lusts and sins After I heard of praying to God I let it fall and regarded it not after I came to hear the word I sometimes feared but soon lost it again Then my heart ran away after our former courses and then what ever I heard I lost because my heart was run away and many were my sins and therfore I could not get pardon because my heart run away and many were my sins and I did indeed go into the Country But afterwards I hearing the Catechism I desired to learn it and then I beleeved that when Beleevers die their souls go to God and are ever happy when Sinners die their souls go to Hel and are ever tormented and that when Christ judges the world our bodies rise again and then we shall receive the judgment of Christ the good shal stand at his right hand the bad at his left this I beleeved was true and then I saw all my great follies and evils and now my heart desired to lay by hunting and to work every day and this is Gods Command and therfore a good way God said Thou shalt work six daies and if thou work thou shalt eat therfore I beleeve it and my heart promiseth that I will this do as long as I live Now I see I did great folly for now I hear that God saith Work and now I fear because God hath afflicted me in taking away my brother a Ruler now I am troubled I fear I sinned in not beleeving our Ruler because now God hath taken him away he taught me good words but I beleeved them not and now I repent because Christ calleth me to it great is the punishment of God in taking away our Ruler and now I pray and say to Christ Oh Jesus Christ Christ
I have sinned I beleeve that if I repent and be humbled and pray not only outwardly but inwardly and beleeve in Christ then God will pardon all my sin but I cannot get pardon of sin I cannot deserve pardon but only Christ hath merited pardon for us I cannot deliver my self from all my sins but Christ redeemeth and delivereth from all sin I deserve not one mercy of God but Christ hath merited all mercies for us The next are the Confessions of Robin Speene who three several times came forth and confessed as followeth His first Confession I Was ashamed because you taught to pray to God and I did not take it up I see God is angry with me for all my sins and he hath afflicted me by the death of three of my children and I fear God is still angry because great are my sins and I fear lest my children be not gone to Heaven because I am a great sinner yet one of my children prayed to God before it died and therefore my heart rejoyceth in that I remember my Panwaning for he was a Panwan my lust my gaming and all my sins I know them by the Commandements of God and God heareth and seeth them all I cannot deliver my self from sin therefore I do need Christ because of all my sins I desire pardon and I beleeve that God calls all to come to Christ and that he delivereth us from sin Robin Speen His Second Confession I Have found out one word more great are my sins and I do not know how to repent nor do I know the evil of my sins only this one word now I confess I want Christ this day I want him I do not truly beleeve nor repent I see my sin and I need Christ but I desire now to be redeemed and I now ask you this Question What is Redemption I answered him by shewing him our estate by Nature and desert the price which Christ paid for us and how it is to be applied to every particular person which done he proceeded in his Confession thus I yet cannot tell whether God hath pardoned my sins I forget the Word of God but this I desire that my sins may de pardoned but my heart is foolish and a great part of the Word stayeth not in my heart strongly I desire to cast all my sins out of my heart but I remember my sins that I may get them pardoned I think God doth not yet hear my prayers in this because I cannot keep the Word of God only I desire to hear the Word and that God would hear me Robin Speen His Third Confession ONe word more I cal to mind Great is my sin this saith my heart I have found this sin when I first heard you teach that all the world from the rising to the sitting Sun should pray to God I then wondered a● it and thought I being a great sinner how shal I pray to God and when I saw many come to the Meeting I wondred at it But now I do not wonder at that work of God and therefore I think that I do now greatly sin and now I desire again to wonder at Gods Works and I desire to rejoyce in Gods good waies Now I am much ashamed and fear because I have deserved eternal wrath by my sins my heart is evil my heart doth contrary to God and this I desire that I may be redeemed for I cannot help my self but only Jesus Christ hath done al this for me and I deserve no good but I beleeve Christ hath deserved all for us and I give my self unto Christ that he may save me because he knoweth eternal life and can give it I cannot give it to my self therefore I need Jesus Christ my heart is full of evil thoughts and Christ only can keep my soul from them because he hath paid for my deliverance from them The next are the Confessions of Nishohkou who twice made preparitory Confessions the first of which only was read before the Elders GOD in Heaven is merciful and I am sinful when I first heard the Word of God I neither saw nor understood but after when you taught these words Be wise Oh all ye people and beleeve in Jesus Christ then I prayed unto God yet afterwards I sinned and almost forsook praying to God Afterward I understood That God who made all the World was merciful to sinners and truly I saw my heart very sinful because I promised God to pray as long as I live but my heart hath not so done Again I promised God I will follow Christ in al things and now I find my heart backward and not so forward to make a Church God promiseth If foolish ones pray to God for Wisdom he will give it this Promise I beleeve but I find my heart full of temptations but now I promise God as in the Psalm * All my works shal be done in wisdom for I confess al my works and words have been foolish God is wise and good but I am foolish God who hath made the World sent his own Son Jesus and Jesus Christ hath died for us and deserved for us pardon and life this is true and he hath done for me all Gods Commandements for I can do nothing because I am very sinful God in Heaven is very merciful and therfore hath called me to pray unto God God hath promised to pardon al their sins who pray unto God and beleeve in the Promise of Christ and Christ can give me to beleeve in him When he had made this Confession he was much abashed for he is a bashful man many things he spoke that I missed for want of through understanding some words and sentences therfore before the Fast day he made another Confession which was not read before the Elders which was as followeth Nishohkou I am dead in sin Oh! that my sins might die for they cannot give life because they be dead before I prayed to God I did commit all filthynesse I prayed to many gods I was proud full of lusts adulteries and all others sins and therefore this is my first Confession that God is mercifull and I am a sinner for God have given unto me instruction and causeth me to pray unto God but I only pray words when I prayed I somtimes wondered and thought true it is that God made the world and me and then I thought I knew God because I saw these his works and then I was glad somtimes and gave thanks yet presently again I did not rejoyce in it Again somtimes I thought now I do wel because I pray and work not on the Sabbath daies but come to the Meetings and hear the Word of God But afterward again I thought I do not wel because true it is That yet I do not truly pray for now I see I sin when I pray because there is nothing but sin in my mouth or hand or heart and all sins are there for of these my sins my heart is full