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A94794 A legacy for saints; being several experiences of the dealings of God with Anna Trapnel, in, and after her conversion, (written some years since with her own hand) and new coming to the sight of some friends, they have judged them worthy of publike view; together with some letters of a latter date, sent to the congregation with whom she walks in the fellowship of the Gospel, and to some other friends. Trapnel, Anna.; Proud, John, fl. 1654.; Ingold, Caleb. 1654 (1654) Wing T2032; Thomason E806_1; ESTC R207169 57,632 72

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of his water-spouts upon me that then all the waves had gone over me but I then saw his now men hath theirs but mens billows are easie to his because my father smileth that which is sweeter then the hony comb qualifies that bitterness I have from unreasonable men Paul met with beasts at Ephesus I may say also I have met with beasts in Cornwell unreasonable men roared upon me they endeavoured to let out to the utmost their cruelty and disgraceful usage which they manifested furiously coming into the chamber where I lay at one Mr. Hills in Trurow who invited me to his house to visit his wife in his absence he having taken a journey to London and is there for the present and his wife desired me to lodge there all night the which I did and it was told me that a warrant was out for me and I was to be sought for at Captain Langdons or at Major Baudens which is my other dear friend but in the mean time I coming to the Town where the Sessions was they heard of it and talk was that they would send for me the first day that I came which was the fourth day of the last week and I expected that day to have been called but truly the Lord saw I was not enough prepared for my timerous fearful nature did much work I never having been called before a Ruler I begun to consult with flesh and blood but the Lord prevented them that day that so I might receive strength from the mount before their valleys were presented And blessed be the Lord that night the Lord appeared lovely all night part of it I was discoursing with a young Minister his name is Mr. Paul he came out of the west to see me having heard such various reports of me for the book had given a report before I came here and this man after some time spent in discourse I desired him to pray the which he did very sweetly he desired it of me but I refused yet after he had done the Lords wind filled my sails that I swom to the haven where was pretious lading brought me and I saw eminent riches and royalty all that night continuing in prayer and singing till day light sitting in a chair and many with me men and women and that Minister they all came to visit me and the Lord was among us and in the morning I was had to bed being very weak and I lay till the afternoon silent in a very great Rapture of joy and my enemies that acted secretly and the open ones too I beheld devising against me all the reproach and ill usage they could and in the afternoon while I was singing they sent the Constable for me who made a great bussel saying he had an order to bring me out of my bed and he pulled me but I felt nothing then many men and women talking to him some saying he had better please God then man he trembled and said he must do what he was commanded but in the mean time Captain Langdon went to the Bench of Justices and desired them to be pacified till the morrow and if I were in a capacity I should come he would pass his word and many offered body for body but nothing would appease them they were desired to come and see and hear so some of them came and they made a great tumult in the house and commanded my friends out of the chamber onely some few stayed and these cruel Rulers had no patience to hear but pulled me off my pillow and rung me by the nose and caused my eye-lids to be pulled up but no harm I felt nor nothing interrupted me the which they seeing ceased the Lord overpowering them though their rage was great that they said they would take me out of bed they could not and at that same time one Welsted a great Presbyterian Priest he called out in the chamber door where he then stood saying a whip will fetch her out but my father preserved me from the promping Clergy and the fiery Magistrate that day And at night about seven of the clock I came to some ordinary frame to discourse and said how quiet have I lain all this day hath none been in the chamber Reply was yes many and then my friends came and told me all that had happened that day for which I praised the Lord and I hope I shall never forget that days mercy and I bless the Lord I slept more sweeter that night following this storm then I have done since I came hither and in the morning rose and went to the Sessions house I being sent for where I went without dauntedness fearful timerous nature being strucken dead through mount Corrobborating and when I came no witness they had appeared for them but a Clergy one and of him and his actings the letter to the Church makes mention which I have made bold to send to you to read or have it read among them and further when I said not guilty according to that bill that was found against me they had other bills against me and my friend Captain Langdon too but they could not be found which if they could have found a bill against my friend he could not have been my surety herein the Lord appeared too and I am bound with my sureties to Travers the indictment at the next Sessions there to be questioned by the Bench upon the same matter in the indictment I was bound to the good Behaviour and constrained to enter into Recognizance with Sureties to appear at the next Assizes And after they had thus done they questioned me about the book pen'd at London which they tendered to me and asked me whether I would own that book as mine I answered I was not carefull to answer them to that matter they then caused the Vision which mentions the horns and Cows and Oxen to be read and asked me what I would say to that was that mine I said as before I would not answer them touching the book I saying that they were not to question me in this Country concerning what was spoken at White-hall for that I thought there was a Council wise enough to examine as to that and they writ down I denyed all But as because I would not accuse my self to satisfie their wills Further they came to question me where I had dwelt and from what part of London I came and what moved me to come hither did none ask me to come this they asked me often and I Replied I would not accuse any And I said I had liberty to come here as well as to another place For that I was not under any Restraint They said no that was true But what moved me to come hither and to this many speak at once And I said are you all Speakers at once against me I will speak to the civilest of you and so directed my speech to one Then they asked me whether an extraordinary impulse was that which
of Idols and yet never bow down to a picture But oh when the Lord took away my gods how I lamented and the more spirituall my company was in their discourse the more stony hearted I was I could freely speak to those that lived under an old administration my spirit being under the same a legall discourse suited best with me when I have been among those that have been filled with joy being Proffessors of Divine love and much acquainted with free grace in the power of it which I was very ignorant of so that their company was burdensom to me yet I could not keep from them sometimes I have gone from them full of horror and my heart ready to burst and my countenance hath startled them that have come to visit me they have said I looked so gastly that they were affrighted to see me asking me what I ailed which I could hardly tell them I was so filled the with terrors of the Law I have come from hearing the word preached even distracted so that my mother would say to me if thou dost fast so day after day and run thus up and down the devill will take advantage against thee but I could not indure to be spoken to my spirit was so peevish and f●oward and I apprehended I was never the better for my hearing so much and praying and fasting yet I could not forbear And many that were inlightned in the doctrine of free grace took a great deal of pains with me perswading me to hear those Ministers that taught most upon the doctrine of free grace but I could not relish that doctrine it was such a cold lean poor discovery I thought I being under the flashes of hell I delighted in the thunderings of the Law and they pleased me best that preached most upon the Law and that prest legall qualifications which I strove to come up to and thought I should never have Christ without I was so qualified as I was taught unto which I could not attain for all my strugling and striving after it which made me conclude that I was not elected if I were I should be made conformable to his Image who is holy which I was not and therefore I was none of Christs flock which condition was very dreadful to me to be without Christ and I could not receive a word of satisfaction from any though some would say to me dost thou not love Christ I would say but how shall I know whether my love be true love I may think I love Christ and deceive my self I not being able to judge of may love whether it were right or no and therefore I was so puzled because I looked for that in the first place which should come in as a second evidence which caused my spirit continually to be in a hurry I delighted to hear much of Christ preached to righteteou ones but I cared not to hear Christ preached to sinners for I looked first for holiness and then for Christ But the great and glorious God at length throughly convinced me of his justifying ungodly ones and that he sent Christ not to call the Righteous but Sinners and he came to save the chiefest of sinners and now I began to hearken to free grace and I saw nothing else could revive me and I found my spirits a little stayed in listening to the free tenders of Christ and then I was put upon arguing with God intreating him to give me Christ which he had given as the onely object for poor sinners to flie unto being stung with sin he was the brazen Serpent that the father set up for to heal and take away that sting of sin and now though I could not come unto God as a righteous one I could come as a sinner and beg of God to receive me being such an object that he sent forth his love to commending it to sinners and to rebels and I desired oh that I might be one of those rebels that might have a pardon were it upon never so hard terms and truly I sound God trying me to purpose it was a very hard thing to me to be ranked amongst the vildest miscreants in the world and to behold my self as bad as the greatest adulterer or blasphemer in the world which I looked upon to be a great deal vilder then I and further from Gods accepting but this conceit free grace laid in the dust and Divine light shewed me the spawn and seed of all sin within my corrupt nature which made me to lie in the dust and to cry out Lord let free grace own me else I am undone when the Law of the Spirit came then sin revived and I died it shewed me every secret sin that I saw not before so that all my sins were set in order before me and I beheld them innumerable Oh what a deplored condition was I i● forlorn and without hope nothing now could comfort me but the true Comforter and nothing could speak peace to my soul but Christ I saw I was undone without the Son looked upon me and my spirit grew very restless and my thirst was very great oh how I long after the water of life I often told God I c●uld not subsist without it a generall promise would not serve my turn though it a little quiteted me when I was in great agonies yet I could not be satisfied without a knowledge of God as my father I thought to hear of an inheritance and not to have an interest in it it did but aggravate my sorrow I must have a particular promise the Spirit also to bear witness to my spirit and sealing me up to the day of Redemption I must have an assurance upon good grounds my heart could not now cheat me with a counterfeit assurance it had so often deceived me and made me take comfort from false grounds and still carried me about but never brought me to my journeys end I entered not into my true rest till the Lord brought me to cease from my own works and to take a Christ upon his own terms Oh what a knotty piece was I for the great Jehovah to work upon untill he put forth his mighty power I could not believe though many that cryed down free grace as a doctrine of liberty to sin I found no doctrine so striking at my sins as it and though some would tell me I had found out an easie way to heaven now to go to heaven in believing but I found it a hard way yea impossible for I could not believe till the day of Gods power I found it as easie to keep the whole Law as to believe I saw it alone the work of the most high and in his own time his arm brought salvation to the heart of a poor miserable lost creature had it not been for free grace which I must continually acknowledge and ascribe praise to him who is worthy of honour for evermore I could speak much concerning the time of my sorrow of my
shaken by that foundation that shall stand for ever God will set his Mountain on the top of all Mountains there indeed shall be the munition of rocks on rocks and one glory within another Oh what varieties are in the feasts that the Saints bridegroom provides for them If they be slumbering when his feasts are ready he sounds out the golden trumpet of his spirit and causeth a great alarm to come forth from himself which immediatly awaketh the Spouse that it saith it is the voice of my beloved that saith arise and come away leave those Babylonish garments behind that thou hast as it were been wrapt in surely the filthy polluted ragged garments that hang upon the Lords Ioshuaes Zach. 3.3 4. those who are his anointed Priests shall be shaken off the white robe of Righteousness shall be their clothing although the evil one may hang his rags on Gods Priests they shall not abide because they are of a royall descent they are the Kings children rags are the clothing of such that sit on dunghils and filthy garments for such that tumble in the mire but Saints clothing is whiter then the snow in Salmon purer then the purest thing that mortall eye can behold and this spirituall part of a Saint nothing can defile though it be of never such a tainting nature I confess what ever action or word or thought hath any thing of flesh in it there is rags for flesh is altogether a garment of rags the most refined flesh is a filthy garment not becoming a Saint no garment becomes a Saint but Jesus Christ his words and actions and thoughts and motions Oh how ragged and polluted are they if their clothing be not Jesus Christ streams are full of mud that flow not from this fountain those waters are brack●sh that come not from this Conduit no water refresheth like that River the streams thereof are said to refresh the City of God Psal 46.4 this is water of life that in dying times makes lively and when weeds are burnt up and wither the plants shall sprout forth and wax green and blossom as the rose and none shall pluck them up This short word is all that we meet with of this discourse she being to this day prevented of perfecting it with that enlargement intended and desired if what hath been presented here may administer any service either to the spirit of God in her for the Justification thero● which is now under a cloud or to poor sinners or trembling Saints for the drawing or refreshing of their benighted imprisoned spirits by the discovery of the riches glory of free love and the power of the spirit thus far appearing in this handmaid of God it will increase through Christ our rejoycing and abundant thanksgiving in the Lord who is shortly putting a new song into our mouths of Glory and triumph over all things whatsoever through the approaching and appearance of Iehovah in his glory amongst us FINIS To the Church sometimes meeting at AL-HOLLOWS Dear Friends IT hath pleased the Lord to cast me at a distance from you and your precious meetings and sweet lovely spirituall desirable enjoyments which is more prized by me then my life or liberty the which is now in Jeopardy but I am through Divine strength not onely willing to be bound but to dye upon so honourable an account as I here suffer for which is onely the expressing the Lords bounty and rich grace to sinners my heart overflowing therewith I cannot hold my compassion and dear affections worketh forth towards Christs flock so strongly that the Anti-christian Clergy hearing the sound were not able to bear it and therefore because they saw so many adhere to the extraordinary things discovered by and through a weak instrument it was grievous to them and they would not admit of any discourse with me but cryed out to the Magistrate to lay bonds upon me saying we must not have the people so deluded calling me witch deluder Imposter and other vilde terms they cast on me and farther said I stirred and provoked the p●ople to Rebellion against powers though I never spake as touching them since I came into the Country any great matter so as to be questioned by any but a Clergy man one Mr. Powel a great Teacher in these parts hath taken his oath against me that he heard me repeat that vision spoken of in the book which he never did Concerning the Cows and Oxen. I never changed a word with him but he coming into a friends house where many pretious souls were met which desired me to give an account of Gods dealings with me from a child which I did and I never found such a broken self-abasing self-denying frame of spirit in me as then and though this man pretended much mildness towards me yet he hath discovered much falshood and rage and because I when brought before the Rulers said I was not guilty according to the form of the bill as it was laid together against me he said I denyed my Christ and the Spirit But I have sent you the bill for to pass your judgement of my answer whether I should not have denyed Christ if I had acknowledged guilty to all therein which I must have done had I said guilty And they have bound me to the good Behaviour then they granted me a Travers to the next Sessions which is 13. weeks hence and Captain Langdon my faithful friend I came down with he and Major Bauden they were bound for my appearance 150 l. a piece and 1200 l. these dear friends they were of the late Parliament which the Priests had no good will unto and their hatred is because their standing quivers and their fat benefices are almost at an end sure I am they are Christs greatest enemies that hath been and now is Therefore that you may be answered as touching Christs Reign beg that to be tumbled down that as rotten rafters stand in the way I am very sure the Lord will cut his work short in righteousness and by all interruptions is making way for his Dyadem of beauty to appear he will set his King up as chief Protector let men and devils do what they can Therefore my dear friends be not of a doubtful mind stand fast hold your confidence and Resolution concerning those particulars you first engaged in at the setting that blessed meeting up wherein the Lords presence hath been eminently seen and their spawn is discovered therby which we thought had been free from sting and because we own that second days meeting in joyning with your pounds a few mites therefore we are watched by professors as if we were treacherous to the State but here are a company of close walking Saints to what they know and they would be more informed concerning generation-generation-work but warning is to speak no more in that name and many of the souldiers for coming to the place where I am are warned to their colours and an Ensign