as other youths did at all these things because thereby did original sin grow in me and hard it was to root it out and hard to believe After this I heard still and more I understood I heard Gen. 16. that the people were full of sin lust and all other sin and therefore the Lord destroyed them and I knew that I had the same sins and therefore I was afraid but I feared only this bodily life and not for my Soul After this my heart did a little desire to pray to God because God found Noah righteous and did save him therefore I desired to pray but again I laid it by and I said it is vain to pray for if I pray and should commit sin I shall be punished or imprisoned but if I pray not I may commit what sin I will and have no punishment for it About a year after I heard the Minister teach another word that the Death of Christ is precious and our death is nothing worth therefore God promiseth pardon of all sins for Christ his sake he bid us remember this against next time When he came again he asked me and I did remember it and do to this day but I confess I did not believe only I did remember it and answered when I was asked And then again I desired to pray to God and would not go away but it was because I loved our place and dwelling I prayed but I believed not I considered not Eternal Life but only this worldly life And thus I went on till they chose Rulers at Natik they chose me and I refused because I believed not After that my Wife and Child died and I was sick to death but lived again and being well I thought I could not pray I was a Child and therefore could not I put off praying to God my Relations died and why should I pray but then I considered why does God thus punish me yea the Minister spake to me about it and said it may be it was because I refused to do Gods work as Moses when he first refused God was patient but when he persisted in his refusal God was angry and then my heart saw my sin and then my heart almost believed I desired to do right and to keep the Sabbath for I further heard in the 4th Commandment Remember the Sabbath to keep it holy and Psa. 101. I will walk wisely in a perfect way Also in Isay 58. If thou turn away thy foot from the Sabbath and do not thy own works nor find thy own pleasure nor speak thy own words therefore my Soul desired to keep the Sabbath then the Souldiers came upon us on the Sabbath day while we were at meeting and took away our Guns and caused us to bring them as far as Roxbury that night my heart was broken off my heart said God is not the Sabbath is not it is not the Lords Day for were it so the Souldiers would not have then come then my heart cast off praying then we came before the Magistrates and Cutshamoquin asked Why they came on the Sabbath-day It was answered that it was lawful but I did not understand it That day I being very thirsty did drink too much and was brought before the Magistrates and was ashamed I came to Roxbury to the Minister and there I was ashamed also because I had greatly sinned then I cried to God for Free-mercy because precious is the Death of Christ oh pardon this my sin Yet again I had temptations to drinking and then I considered what a great sinner I was even like a beast before God Then I heard that word Mat. 5. He that breaketh the beast of Gods Commands and teacheth others so to do shall be the least in the Kingdome of Heaven My heart said Lord such an one have I been for I have been an active sinner yet I cried again for mercy O Lord freely pardon my great sins Again I confess I am very weak even like a very child and I so walk and know not what to do if I die I fear I shall die in my sin yet I cried again O God pardon me for Christ his sake Again further I confess that when I was troubled about our wants poverty and nakedness I considered that text Foxes have holes and Birds have nests but the Son of man hath not whereon to lay his head And again Mat. 6. The Birds plough not and the flowers spin not and yet God doth both feed and cloath them and therefore be not over-much troubled about these things yet I desire to follow labour with my hands because Gen 1. God gave Adam dominion over the creatures and commanded him to Till the ground And Gen. 2. He set him in the Garden and commanded him to dress it and keep it Also Gen. 3. he said Thou shalt eat thy bread in the sweat of thy face all thy dayes till thou returnest to thy dust When I remember these things my heart doth bow to labour also I heard that riches were the root of all evil and Dives with his fine apparel and dainty fare was in hell and poor Lazarus was in heaven When my heart is troubled about our Land â—nd about riches I quiet my heart with these meditations Also I further heard when my heart was troubled about Salvation and doubted I heard that there is no means of Salvation but Christ not any thing in the world can carry us to heaven only Christ which I did believe by Gen. 28. where Iacob dreamed a dream and he saw a Ladder which stood on earth and the top reached up to heaven and that Ladder is Christ who is Man and so toucheth the earth and God and so is in heaven and by believing in him we ascend to heaven as by a ladder This helped me almost to believe and I cried Oh Christ be thou my Ladder to heaven Again Ioh. 14. Christ saith None cometh to the Father but by me therefore I believe nothing can carry me to God but only Christ if I penitently believe in him Again I confess I do still find my self very weak to resist sin for if I read and teach on the Sabbath I teach indeed but I do not as I ought and therefore that Word of Christ doth rebuke me Mat. 23. Hear and do what they say but do not as they do When I do among others reprove sinners that Word of Christ reproveth me Thou hypocrite first cast the beam out of thine own eye and then thou mayest see clearly so cast the moat out of thy brothers eye Again when I pray I find hypocrisie in my heart to do it to be seen of men and that Word of Christ reproveth me Mat. 6. They pray to be sâ—en of men verily they have their reward and then I cryed mightily to God O Lord help me pardon me what shall I do Again I heard Mat. 9. The Son of Man hath power to pardon sin on earth and therefore me O Lord then
speak it I confesse that in my mothers belly I was defiled in sin my father and mother prayed to many gods and I heard them when they did so and I did so too because my parents did so and in my childhood afore I could act sin I did delight in it as dancing and Pawwaug and when they did so they prayed to many gods as Beasts Birds Earth Sea Trees c. After I was born I did all such things I loved lust when I was a youth though I did act these lusts but a little But when I had a little begun my heart did very much desire more to do such sins I saw the English keep Sabbath I cared not but played and catch't birds or any thing yet when I saw Englishmen I ran away on the Sabbath day because they should not see mee As yet I knew not of great sins as Murder Adultery then some Indians said we must pray to God When I was in English houses I saw them pray and I thought it a vain work They said there was but one God I thought nay there be many Gods When Indians said Wee will pray my heart said No I will not so long as I live Yet I heard more and more of praying to God and that my brothers prayed to God but my heart said Praying to God is vain After I heard Waban did pray and my brothers Wompoâ—as and Toteswoâ—mp yet my heart said No I am well enough I have not so sinned as other men I am no Murderer Adulterer c. Then I ran away yet I was not much troubled because my brothers prayed A little after I came and my brother said to mee I pray you pray to God I answered him not but my heart said No yet I was troubled because I heard my brothers I thought if any should kill my brothers I would kill him if any Warrs were I would go with my brothers only I thought of my love to my brothers and then that if my brother make Warr I would go with him to kill men Now he prayes shall not I go with my brothâ—â—â—◠〈◊〉 my brothers love me and they both pray to God 〈◊〉 should not I They prayed morning and 〈…〉 they eat and on Sabbath dayes then I thought I would do so but it was not for love of God or fear of God but because I loved my brothers Again when I came to Noonantam I heard the Minister preach and I desired to hear what he 〈…〉 taught but I understood not 〈…〉 because I understood stood 〈…〉 to hear I heard some youths 〈…〉 Roxbury My brother said to me Go you because you may learn Smithery For that reason I did go but desired not to learn to pray all these things were vain When we came to Roxbury I said I desired to learn Smithery But my Master said I may not teach him my Trade lest Indians learn to make Locks and Guns Then I would not dwell with him and thought to cast off praying and thought I would forsake my brothers My brother perswaded mee to dwell one year there but I would not yet at last I did dwell there one year and went to meeting but in vain for I understood not one word After that year I returned to Noonantam and then I heard that God made all the world but yet I did not pray to God one jot but still sinned and especially the sin of Lust I made light of any sin I heard and understood the Commands of God Thou shalt not murder commit adultery steal bear false witness covet and that made me afraid to commit sin afore man lest I should be punished or put to death but I feared not God After I heard the Minister ask Who made you A. God and Who redeemed you A. Christ and Who must sanctifie you The holy Ghost and that God made Heaven Earth Sea c. then I a little considered of God who made all this world and then I was afraid I saw that no man could make these things and that therefore we must pray to God Then my heart said Assuredly it is so God made all things and made mee and I must pray to him After this my brothers were sick and I prayed God Oh that they may live and then I heard that now God tryeth mee whether I will pray or no I confesse I have done many sins especially lust though I had not been a Murderer or the like But then my brothers and kindred dyed then my heart said Sure it 's a vain thing to pray to God for I prayed yet my friends dyeâ— therefore I will run wilde and did cast off praying I did not pray morning and night and at meat only on the Sabbath day I came to meeting but I cared not for hearing nor did I believe any thing I heard but I still lived in sin and my heart said I will run away for here we are hindred from sin in other places I may freely sin Then my brothers which lived were troubled for mee Then I said I will abide with my brothers because I love them but not because I would pray Then that Winter God broke my head I knew but little I was almost dead Then my heart said Now I know God is angry with mee for my sins and hath therefore smote mee then I prayed hard when I was almost dead I remembred my sins much and considered them much I remembred that God made all the world and therefore assuredly there is a God I heard that God made Adam and made him in his own image Gen. 1. and assuredly none but God could make all the world heaven earth sea c. then I did believe that God did make the world Again I confesse I saw that I had offended against God and sinn'd against him and that I had the root of sin in me and that I had deserved all miseries and death and hell I heard that God made a Covenant with Adam and forbad him to eat of the Tree in the midst of the Garden and yet he did eat and therefore God was angry with man and I was born in sin and therefore God was angry with me and because I have sometime forsaken God and run wilde therefore I now know my sin and my offence against God I desire no more to cast off God and prayer for now I know my sins and that I have deserved misery therefore now I desired to pray to God as long as I live I desired pardon of my sins and I thought it may be God will pardon mee and my heart prayed to God Oh God if thou give mee life again I will assuredly believe and obey and now I know my sins by the sin of Adam but when I had thus done quickly my heart would be vain again After my wound when I came to my self and awaked I saw my sin and promised God to pray unto him when I saw the mercy of God was so great unto mee I heard that word
did not rightly pray though I came on the Sabbath day Then about the time that my Son who was at School was born the Minister taught on 1 Chron. 28. 9. Thou Solomon my son know the God of thy fathers c. if thou seek him hee will be found of thee if thou forsake him hee will cast thee off for ever Then I feared for I said This already I have done I have cast off God and therefore he will cast off me for every such one God will cast off I know not what to do It repented me for my sin I feared Gods wrath and damnation Then I prayed and call'd upon God yet only sometimes I repented and after I found my heart full of sin again But then I was angry at my self and knew not what to do alwayes I did fear God hath cast me off for all my many sins which I have done Hereby I was troubled and angry at my self Then I heard that word Who ever repent and believe shall be saved I l'e pardon them Then my heart cryed Oh Christ let it be so that my sins may be pardoned and that I may pray alwaies Then I begged Lord give me repentance and faith and I did pray to God much Then I did beg that I might give up my self wife and children to God as long as we live and then I prayed Then I heard that word Mat. 5. Hee that looks on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery in his heart I then remembred my sins that though I had promised to pray yet I had thus sinned and my heart was now troubled about this My heart said Cast off praying because you are filthy in lust your heart and eyes still commit adultery therefore run away from these that pray to God and go to Qunniticot or some other place and if you be in other places you may do what you will and my heart almost inclined to this sin But after that this merciful word of God I heard That Satan led Christ into the wilderness to tempt him and so I thought hee would do me Then I desired God to be merciful to me then I turned to God and cryed but knew not what to do for I feared God had cast me off and I shall perish for ever God has cast me off and I have deserved hell fire Then I heard that word Joh. 14. 6. None come to the Father but by me I did pray Oh Christ let it be so that by thee I may come to God and I pray Christ Jesus pardon all my sins this mercy I beg Then I repented my casting off praying to God then I promised I would not return again to sin and if Christ help me I and children shall serve God Then that Spring my mother and two children dyed and I was troubled and knew not what to do my heart said Lay by prayer but that I did not but I saw Christ came to give eternal life and therefore what Christ will do for me so let it be Therefore I believe only in Christ for eternal life and what Christ will do with my soul so let it be and my soul desireth that I may receive the Seals to make strong my heart Piumbuhhou ASsuredly I have nothing that I should confesse as I ought for my heart is full of foolishness and darkness stopt up is my heart and deaf are my ears I know not by what way I can get life I was born in sin into this world and therefore I am in folly and I know my heart is full of foolishness and ignorance I am a great sinner ever since I saw light in this world my foolishness appeareth in every thing I do in this life I know not what God hath given me but now I hear of the mercy of God who hath made the world and all things in it by this great work of his I know there is a God and because my heart checketh mee for sin and I fear the punishment of God And the Word of God now sheweth me that there is a God therefore my heart sayes I desire to pray to God and because God is angry with me for all my sins I know nothing by my self but that which is evil I heard that word Mat. 5. Blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom of heaven Then my heart said So be it Oh Lord to me and I love thee as long as I live Then said my heart I am a poor man and desire to pray to God Again God said Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after righteousness for they shall be filled Then when I heard that word my heart rejoyced and yet again I doubted and my heart misbelieved and feared Then that word came that Christ saith Be ye mercifull as your heavenly father is merciful And again Hee maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust When I heard it my heart rejoyced to hear of the mercy of God yet I doubted and my heart was hard again Now I confess before God because God is a great God and a mercifull God and I pray to him I heard of Gods great mercy to give us his only Son to dye for us therefore I loved God and I begged Oh God pardon all my sins and I give up my self to Jesus Christ Monotunkquanit BEfore I prayed to God I lived at Nipmuk I did not know that there was a God only I lived for nothing for no end or purpose but I alwaies did wilde actions I kept no Sabbath nor Lecture nor any work of Prayer nor did I remember my works I now know that all my words and works are naught my eyes and ears are stopped and mad works I dayly did After I went to Dorchester Indians the praying Indians and they that were my friends did say it was good to pray to God and said Tomorrow is our Lecture and the Minister cometh to teach us then my heart desired to see the Minister and hear what he said next day he came and taught the Indians I went and desired to see when I came my son Sam. came with mee the Minister call'd my son and set him afore and asked him Who made him and he was taught to answer God Then he commended my son and asked whose son he was they said Mine The Minister gave him two apples then the Minister said to me Do you pray to God you see your childe saith God made him and therefore it is your duty to pray to God Then I considered what he said I could not sleep that night I considered whether I should pray to God my heart did much doubt that night Shall I pray my heart said No yet I doubted Then Waban came to my house to Nipmuk and perswaded me to pray to God I said I know not how to pray Hee said God will teach you God is a great God and made all the world I
answered Who knoweth that and who can witness that He said The Minister is sent of God and sheweth us Gods Word and hee by that teacheth us Then I promised Waban that when hee came again I would pray to God Then Toteswamp came and exhorted me to pray to God and told me of Christ and pardon of sin and then almost my heart prayed to God Then I said English men understand not me and does God understand me They said God made all◠and understands all then I said I will pray to God Then I heard first that God made heaven and earth and all things and in six dayes finished them and also made man in his own Image wise and holy like God Then I heard that Satan came and tempted Eve and cozened her and she tempted the man And God had said Eat not of the tree in the midst of the Garden if yee eat thereof yee shall dye yet she did eat and gave unto man and he did eat and thereby he sinned and all his posterity became sinful and deserved damnation Then my heart said What shall I do and I prayed for my children for now I hear of eternal damnation and sure I am a great sinner Again I heard the Minister preach That Christ was born like a man and was both God and man and dyed for us and sheweth us the way of eternal life Then I cryed Oh Lord give me Christ because Christ hath dyed for us and hath made his righteousness ours and our sins are Christs as Adam made his sin ours Now my heart was broken and I saw that I was a great sinner When I heard of the great works of Christ I said Oh what shall I do that I may get Christ I said in my heart Oh let the holy Spirit help me for I am ashamed of my sins melted is my heart and I desire pardon of all my sins now I desire to forsake all my sins and now I desire dayly to quench lusts and wash off filth and cast out all my sins by the blood of Jesus Christ and this I do by believing in Jesus Christ Gen. 6. there was only one Noah righteous and God saved him then my heart said Oh mercifull God who savest them that trust in thee save mee Again God made his Covenant with Abraham and with all the seed of Abraham now I desire to have this Covenant and to receive this Commandement of Christ Abraham was strong in faith and followed Christ and my heart doth desire to follow Christ because he hath dyed for us Wutásakómpauin OH Christ help mee I confess my sins before God and before men We are all born in sin because Adam sinned and made his sin ours Our Parents knew not God nor the way of life we Indians are all sinners and did all sins afore we heard of God we did pray to every thing that is in the world and knew not the way of life When English men came first we did pray to the Devil and many were our sins and God doth know all our sins all which we have committed before the English came After the English came I went to Sudbury to Mr Browns house and he said to me Pray to God but I did not like it nor to hear of praying to God but afterwards I heard Waban prayed to God and I was not glad of it yet after Waban prayed he told us of it and that the Minister came to Noonantam I heard him and he taught that the souls of good men die and go to heaven the souls of the wicked when they die they go to hell but I only heard it Then we resolved we would pray to God and carry our children to Roxbury that they might learn to pray but we feared that we should not learn to pray After the Minister taught that word that every man himself must pray and believe to be saved and though your sons be at Roxbury and learn to pray yet if you pray not you must be damned Again I heard many words of God this was one Therefore watch for ye know not the day or hour when the Lord will come When I heard that I knew not what to do nor do I know when is the day of death But I am full of sin and when I die Christ will not receive me because I am so full of sin After that my wise dyed and then weak was my heart almost I left praying to God but yet I did not so But after I heard that word of God Who ever heareth the word and doeth it is like a wise builder who built on a rock and when the storms and floods came and beat upon the house it stood because it was built upon a rock But hee that heareth the word and doth it not is like a foolish builder who built upon the sand and the storms and floods came and beat upon that house and it fell because it was built on the sand By this I saw that I was a foolish builder because the death of my wife did almost make me leave praying to God After I had another wife and shee dyed also Then I heard that word That it is Gods love by afflictions to call us to repentance and therefore my heart said Oh Lord I will pray Oh Lord help me Again I heard another word that at the end of the world all must appear before the Iudgment Seat of Christ and therefore now confess all your sins and repent because Christ hath writ down all your actions both good and bad and all shall be opened and therefore repent of your sins that they may be pardoned Then I said I am a great sinner and ever I commit sin I confesse I have deserved hell and I cannot deliver my self but I beg of God Oh Lord give me Christ and I give my soul to Christ that all my sins may be pardond and I now confess my sins before man but at the end of the world I must be judged by Jesus Christ Now I desire the spirit of God would help me to confess all my sins to God that they may be pardoned in Jesus Christ THese Confessions I wrote in English from their mouthes with the best of my endeavours both for diligence and also faithfulness and so soon as they had done I read them unto the Elders and Brethren and Sisters there present and that the substance hereof was delivered by them and faithfully translated and delivered by me to the lest of my understanding I do here before the Lord testifie JOHN ELIOT I Did understand most things that some of those Indians spake and though others spake not so well to my understanding yet many things I understood of what they all spake and thus much I may testifie that according to what I understood the substance of their Confessions is here truly set down JOHN ELIOT jun. Waban being sick when the rest made their Confession after the Lord had restored him came to Roxbury and