his Family as a Little Church when he is at home and that by an unintermitting Diligence and Watchfulness antidotes himself against the Contagions of bad Examples and vain Company and the Temptations of an evil World when he is abroad Who is it that walks so circumspectly as to be unblameable and without Offence Who is it that is so couragious in his Reproofs so zealous of good Works so tender of his own Salvation and of the Salvation of others as he ought to be Our neglect of many thousand Duties calls for long and severe Punishments at the Hands of God And it is a Subject of great Wonder that he will be gracious even to any of the Sons of Men. And what reason has every one that is delivered from Sickness and Pain and Death to bless his holy Name and to say What am I O Lord God that thou shouldst visit and uphold and refresh so great so inexcusable so wilful a Sinner as I have been What am I a poor Worm of the Earth that thou shouldst so mercifully regard me What am I that I should live by thy Goodness when I have so often deserved to die by thy Justice What am I that when I had spent so much of my Time to little purpose thou shouldst give me still more time that he should again put me into his Vineyard when I had loiter'd in it for so long a space and when I had misimproved many thousand Talents and knew not what to answer for them he should pass by and remit my former Debts and put into my Hands a new Stock What am I that his Dew should remain upon my Branches when he might have said of me as of the barren Fig-tree Cut it down why cumbreth it the ground any longer O what Grace is this that a God whom I had so frequently and so heinously provoked should spare me to recover Strength That when I had mock'd him with so many cold and lazy Prayers he should give me opportunity to pray again when I had so often misimproved his Sabbaths and his Gospel and the Offers of his Son that he should continue to me the Blessings of his holy Day the Invitations of his Word and the Calls of Christ that so I may repent of my careless Hearing my Lukewarmness and my Unbelief In the humble sense of our own Unworthiness let us contemplate and admire that God that brings us from the Grave Many People will say If we were humbled and if we did repent God would soon help us This is very true but if God should never be merciful to us till we are prepar'd for Mercy his Mercy and his Help I am afraid would come very late For as we may say It is of the Lord's Mercies that we are not consumed because his Compassions fail not so 't is of the Lord's Mercy that we are delivered and he is gracious because he will be so 2. When we are delivered from Sickness and from the Grave we must remember that Deliverance so as to excite our selves to more Fervour and Affection Before all our Duties we should stir up our selves and that is to be done by an intense and serious application of our Minds to that particular thing which we go about by considering aright the Nature and Consequence of a well-performed Duty Thus when we are going to pray we should say Remember O my Soul to what a glorious God thou dost approach and with what humble Self-abhorrence thou shouldst look unto his Majestick Throne Remember thy own Vileness thy Sins thy Miseries and thy Wants and what need thou hast of a Mediator to make thy poor and thy mean Oblation to be an acceptable Sacrifice what need thou hast of wrestling and striving that thou mayst obtain a Blessing Thus when we give Thanks we may say Remember O my Soul the excellent Perfections of God and the Benefits which thou hast received their Seasonableness their Worth and all the wonderful Particulars they are attended with This excitation of our selves is not acquirable by a few cold and transient Thoughts 't is not one Sally of Religious Meditations now and then but a continuance of these Acts arguing and pleading the Case with our own Souls till the Fire of our Love and Thankfulness begin to burn We should think of the Mercies of God till our Hearts under the sense of his Goodness begin to melt and warm till all that is within us move and stir with holy Elevations towards him Then will the Holy Spirit cherish our Endeavours And when we are with all the Skill we can tuning our Harps he will come in to our Assistance and make the Musick more harmonious and our Praise more sweet and by his vital Influences banish all that Coldness that does usually damp and clog our Hearts in the Duties of Religion There is a great advantage in Soliloquies and a Man may in this Work talk to himself without the reproach of folly This is a means to quiet and appease a rising Storm Psal. 42. 5. and this is the way to make us look upon it with Delight and Thankfulness when 't is past and gone We know that those Sermons which do but explain Truths to us and present them only in their native Excellency and Reasonableness do not equally affect us as those do that are pressed with a fervent and lively Application Nor do those Mercies which we only remember make so much impression as those which we often call to mind and as often urge upon our Hearts When we come before God we must make his Altar smoak with burning Frankincense we must cover it with our chearful Praises and a flaming Love Our knowledg of his Persections is obscure and weak but our Sense causes us very distinctly to feel his Benefits and therefore all our Affections should ascend towards him When his Sun shines full upon us our Hearts should open at his Coming smell with a sweeter Savour upon the being visited with his comfortable Beams As upon our being brought from the Grave and restor'd to Health there is a new Strength in our Bodies so there must be a new Vigour in our Souls and as we discover a very great Earnestness in our Petitions when we want a Mercy so there ought to be as much Fervor in Acknowledgment and return of Thanks when we have received it 3. After we are delivered from the Grave we ought to remember such a Mercy with very great Sincerity i. e. there ought to be a Correspondence between our outward Expressions and the more undiscernable Motions of our Hearts There must be in our Understandings an high Esteem of him who is the Author of all our Good a most deliberate and free choice of him as our Happiness and this Esteem and this Choice is the genuine Product of a real Admiration There is nothing indeed more common than for People on the smallest occasions to say I thank God for this or that but the manner in which
I may but I have had no Rest at all then nor the next nor the next scarce any discernable Sleep I am sure none that was refreshing for above three quarters of a year together And if at any time I rested a little that little Rest was all the while disturb'd with terrible and amazing Dreams and when I awaked I always found my self in strange and unexpressible Pain in Anguish and Bitterness such as nothing in this World is able to represent even as to its lowest degrees And judg you into what Confusions and Disorders this alone would throw a Man if it were single My Disease and my Fears and sad Apprehensions came upon me as a Whirlwind like the rushing of many mighty Waters strange and horrible Pains and great Fears so that it was as an universal Storm from which there was no retreat I said with Hezekiah Isa. 38. 12 13. Mine Age is departed and is removed from me as a Shepherd's Tent I have cut off like a Weaver my Life He will cut me off with pining Sickness from day even to night wilt thou make an end of me I reckoned till morning that as a Lion so will he break all my Bones from day even to night wilt thou make an end of me I was continually full of restless Pain and amazing Thoughts I often said I am now cut off I am come to the End of my Journey I am going to the Grave there was but a Step but a Minute as it were between me and Death nay how often have I been by most terrible Convulsions in the very Jaws of Death They were to me as a Den of Lions and are as painful and as terrible as if a Man were actually torn to pieces And in all these not the least help nor prospect of Relief and these returning every day for many weeks or rather one continued Convulsion-fit and that always with a very quick and cutting Pain it never came upon me but as a Giant or an armed Man and whenever that was I thought my self in the very Moment of my Separation from the Body I thought my self very often just going to the Bar of God I was in Death often often as in the very Agonies and Pangs of Death but I could not die I seemed to have the strength of Brass it seemed to me as if I had been raised up by Almighty Power only that I might be capable to suffer Pains very strange and very terrible I sunk as in the deep Mire Psal. 69. 2. I saw indeed sometimes the Light of Day but it was never refreshing nor comfortable to me for I was often saying with Job chap. 3. 23 24. Why is Light given to a Man whose way is hid and whom God hath hedged in For my Sighing cometh before I eat and my Roarings are poured out like Water I was not in Safety neither had I Rest neither was I quiet yet trouble came For the thing which I greatly feared is come upon me and that which I was afraid of is come unto me I often said I shall never see the World till it be in Flames never see my Friends or Acquaintance nor they me till the Heavens be no more and till the vast Appearance of the great Day Thus my Feet stumbled on the dark Mountains and all was hideous Darkness Woe and Desolation with me Sometimes by the Greatness of my Trouble I was even stifled with Grief that I could not for a great while speak a Word and when I spoke it was in a mournful manner for many Months I could not breath without a mighty Pain and as soon as with Difficulty I had breath'd every Breath was turn'd into a Groan and every Groan was big with a very deep Sorrow I was weary with my Groaning Psal. 6. 6. All the Night made I my Bed to swim and watered my Couch with Tears Nay the Sadness and the stinging Particularities that I apprehended in my afflicted Case made me to weep even till I had no more power to weep Psal. 88. 3. My Soul was full of Troubles and my Life drew nigh to the Grave c. I saw the Grave as beneath me continually opening to swallow me up I often said in my self I shall no more see the Congregations or Assemblies of God's-People I shall never any more enter into his Court nor sing his Praise I shall no more speak in his Name nor experience his loving-kindness in the Land of the Living any more These were some of my Thoughts and this was my inexcusable Infirmity and my Unbelief Those that are in Health will scarcely perhaps credit what I say they will think I am a melancholy Man and aggravate my Trouble and set it out more than needs or than it was and that in the whole there was a great deal more of Fancy than of Reality but I pray God they may never taste one drop of that bitter Cup whereof I was made to drink for if they should they 'l find it whatever Names they now give it to be then full of real Miseries As I have spoke nothing but what I fully believe to be true so I have spoke the more of it that it may be of some use to others that though Trouble and Distresses fall upon them which are very strange and very perplexing or such as rarely happen that they would hope even in the Depths for they may see by me that nothing is too hard for God There are few that having been so near to Death revive again few that have been near it so long together and fewer that after they have recovered are willing to speak of what they then saw and felt but methinks it is not unnecessary to shew to what woful Miseries we are obnoxious in this World and how many ways God has wherewith to correct and punish the Sins of Men. Most People are unwilling to speak of such things as these because others are unwilling to hear such doleful Relations they invent some other Discourse to put it off but their hearing of it is better than to feel it and this may help them to avoid manifold Mischiefs before it be too late You think it may be that I have spoke a great deal and your Attention may be wearied but I'lassure 't is many hundred times below what I felt Great Griefs as well as mighty Joys exceed all our Words and Bitterness is not to be described Never was any I believe nearer to Death not to die never was any compass'd with a greater Danger never any had less hope of an Escape than I and yet the Mercy of a God that is Omnipotent has relieved me And as 't is commonly said that Musick sounds best upon the Water so by setting our Sorrows and our Mercies together our Praise may be more harmonious You may in this behold the Severity and the Goodness of God his Severity in continuing on me so many smart Strokes for so long a space and his Goodness
humble us for our former Sins and direct us what to do for the time to come that our Speech our Conversation may be more profitable than it has been 1 Cor. 15. 58. Eccl. 9. 10. Fourthly Let us live so that our Examples may do good whilst we live and when we are dead For every Man that has the Spirit of Christianity i. e. a generous and a publick Spirit will not only be concerned for himself but for others and not only for the present but for the future Generation And as in this luxurious and most wicked Age of ours there is like to be transmitted to Posterity a great number of very bad Examples so it should be the Care and Endeavour of every good Man to prevent their mischievous influence by doing what in him lies to mend the World We live indeed in a time wherein the most part of People can talk very well but never was there any time in which there was less Practice It is a most easie thing to discourse well but none but a true Believer can live as he ought to do according to the Gospel which requires an universal and a shining Holiness Our Actions and Examples will have a more powerful efficacy than our Words and whilst the one does but touch the Ear the other will penetrate into the very Souls of those that observe us and render themselves Masters of their Approbation even almost whether they will or not We are obliged to have a great regard to the Salvation of our Neighbours and there is no course more likely to succeed than this They will easily follow us when we take them by the hand and advise them to go in no other way but in that where we go our selves When we are fervent in our Prayers it will shame their Coldness when we are serious in our attending on the Word the sight of our seriousness will make them more attentive and our Heat of Affection may kindle some Sparks of Love to God in their colder Hearts and the necessity of a good Example seems to be greater in Cities than in other places for as one observes Du-bose Serm. p. 495. It is certain that great Towns are ordinarily great Theaters of Vices as the Multitude is more numerous so wicked Examples are more frequent Sin hardens it self by the number and authorizes it self by the quantity of Accomplices And as the Fire burns more by a great heap of wood or coals put together so the Ardour of Sin warms and inflames it self by a great Throng of Persons that communicate to one another their criminal Affections Besides in vast and populous Cities they have more Liberty to sin because it is less observed and taken notice of as a Serpent conceals it self among a multitude of Bushes Whereas in little Villages the least faults are soon minded many times in greater places very great Enormities are not discern'd and it concerns us also whom God has raised from the Grave to be more exact in our Course for People will look with a more curious Eye upon us that are recovered to see what we do when they will not it may be look so much to the hand that heal'd us As the People câ—me more to see Lazarus that was risen than Jesus that reviv'd him from the Grave much people of the Jews came not for Jesus sake only but that they might see Lazarus also whom he had raised from the dead Joh. 12. 9. Wicked men are punish'd in Hell for all the Evil they have done 〈◊〉 the World and for all that they have been the cause of it is a new addition to their torments to think how many are going to the same miserable place whose damnation will lye at their door As 't is commonly said that Dives requested of Abraham that some messenger might be sent to warn his Brethren lest they came to the same place not from any Love to their Souls for there is no such Charity in Hell but from a fear that if they came to the same torment his own misery would be the greater for having been in a great measure the cause of theirs by his bad Example And on the contrary 't is a great pleasure to those in Heaven to think that they have been any way instrumental to the Glory of their great Lord and that the Seeds that by good Instructions and holy Example they threw upon the World flourish into Fruit when they are dead Thus they blossom in the dust and their Actions as 't is fabulously reported of some of the Bodies of the Popish Saints send forth a sweet perfume after Death to all the places round about The Saints of God do good indeed to the World when they are gone not by Intercession as Mediators for us but by the good Works which they performed here below and tho their Works follow them to increase their reward yet the remembrance of them stays behind It is hardly to be imagined how far the power of a good Example does diffuse its self when the person that gave it is removed from the World It does encourage others to Religion and to a perseverance in it seeing it has no new difficulties but only those which others have conquered who are now at rest with God Therefore are we commanded to be followers of them who through Faith and Patience have inherited the Promises Heb. 6. 6. We are to follow their Faith considering the end of their Conversation Heb. 13. 7. Those of us that have been so happy as to have had a Religious Education tho we are depriv'd of our Parents yet we full well remember their serious pathetical Exhortations how they did earnestly intreat us to fear God and keep his Commandments We can remember how they set some portion of their time apart every day for Reading the Word and secret Prayer and the other Duties of Religion and when we are gone if we have been truly sincere others cannot but remember our Example Your Children and Servants will greatly mind what you do that are the Master of the Family and you either very much promote or hinder their Salvation for which you must be answerable to God in the approaching day of Judgment Is it not a Credit to your Reputation when your Servant and Apprentice shall thus remember your Example and say Oh how Conscientious was my Master in his Buying and Selling how afraid was he of imposing upon others or of cheating them with many good words whilst he had deceitful intentions in his heart How afraid was he lest the business of his Trade should Justle out Religion or the Shop be an hindrance to the Duties of his Closet or of Family Prayer How careful was he to set aside some of his Gains for the Charitable Relieving of the Poor As to you that are Parents your Children will certainly mind more what you do than what you say If you Sanctifie the Sabbath and are serious in your Service to God you may
have good hope that they will be so but if you are immoderate in your Recreations your Eating Drinking or your Apparel 't is very likely they will be so and what flames will it add to your misery to think that you were the Cause of their Everlasting destruction And how will you bear it to hear their Cries and bitter Expressions when they shall Curse you for not having given to them good Instructions and seasonable Warnings and an holy Example by which they might have been enabled to fly from the Wrath to come You may now do much more good by practising one Command than by causing to learn all the Ten And though you be so poor that you have no Riches or Estate to leave them yet you may leave your Prayers and your good Example to the next Generation We commonly say of a rich covetous Miser That he will never do any good whilst he lives and we may say of him and all others that are not true Christians That they will never do any good when they are dead for when they dye they are like Nero they leave abundance of poison behind them they infected the Air with their Oaths and Blasphemies when they lived and when they are gone the Contagion spreads and their ill President meeting with corrupt Nature which inclines all Men to what is bad does convey its Venome to several others that they left behind What an Impression many times does an unbecoming Word leave upon the Hearer for many years after Much more does the Remembrance of an ill Example Thus their evil Works prove Factors for the Devil and inlarge his Kingdom when they are rotting in the Grave Whereas if you be zealous for God the remaining Flames of your Zeal may awaken some luke-warm and slothful Christian to do what you have done For he may thus argue If that holy Man prayed so hard and strove so much what cause have I to pray and strive for I have a Soul to save as well as he And as the Gate was strait to him so will it be to me and as 't is impossible to handle Perfumes without bearing away part of the scent so it should be to converse with you without savouring of your Goodness You should so live that others may reap the benefit of your holy Life when you are gone As the Earth does not lose the Vertue of its Beams when the Sun is set that Heat and Warmth and Vegetation which it has given to Herbs and Plants does remain and its Influence is felt when it is no longer to be seen thus you will be as Herbs and Flowers which when they are gathered are medicinal and yield juices healthful and necessary to the Body or as the Corn which when it is cut down is serviceable for Food and Nourishment Thus every Man may so contrive it that he may be serviceable to the World when he does not live in it any more Thus the Apostles spread a most diffusive Light by their Holiness and Doctrin which all the Malice of Hell and all the Rage of Tyrants has not been able to extinguish but though they shone with an extraordinary Brightness yet every Believer is a Child of Light every Believer is a Star of great use and benefit tho one Star differeth from another Star in Glory tho he be never so obscure yet he may be beneficial as a Pearl or a Diamond tho it be set in Lead does not cease to be of great Value Thus your Name will be as sweet Ointment delightful and dear to others Whereas if we be wicked we shall have the same Fate with Jehoram who died without being desired 2 Chron. 21. 20. Thus I say our Examples will do more good than many bare Instructions As Souldiers will be more animated and forward when they see one Example of couragious Fighting before their Eyes than by a thousand Rules that teach them the Policies and Designs of War Thus I have shewed you what Improvement those that are recovered and brought from the Grave ought to make of it and what mischief will ensue if they do it not and indeed it is a Mercy to the World that the Lives of ill Men are so short for as one hath lately observed the World is very bad as it is so bad that good Men scarce know how to spend fifty or sixty years in it but how bad would it probably be were the Life of Man extended to six seven or eight hundred years If so near a prospect of the other World as forty or fifty years cannot restrain Men from the greatest Villanies what would they do if they could as reasonably suppose Death to be at three or four hundred years off If Men make such Improvements in Wickedness in twenty or thirty years what would they do in hundreds and then what a blessed place would this World be And to excite you to be the more careful in the improving of your Sickness Let me add these three following Considerations Cons. 1. How many are dead since you were first ill How many excellent Ministers whom you must never hear again How many of your dearest Friends are now in the cold Grave with whom you cannot now discourse and whose Faces you shall never see till the Great Day Many have sunk in a Calm and several among us have outliv'd a Storm Many have perished with less pain and less violent diseases than those which some of us have had This should engage us to make suitable returns to that God who has spared us when he hath taken them away Cons. 2. This Improvement of our Sickness and Recovery will exempt us from the Number of those hateful People that are not only no better but a great deal worse when they are brought out of Distress than they were before and 't is generally thought that of a thousand People that make large Promises in their Sickness there are scarce fifty that keep their Word and perform their Vows when they are recovered Those good Purposes which they had were the Product of their Fears and when those are over their intended Goodness does also vanish away Cons. 3. This good Improvement of your new Life may ingage God to prolong your time to an honourable old Age. For though we can merit nothing at his Hands yet if we labour hard in his Service it may be he will not cause our Sun to go down at Noon but continue us in his Vineyard till the Evening of the Day I now proceed briefly to consider the fourth Verse Ver. 4. Sing unto the Lord O ye Saints of his and give thanks at the Remembrance of his Holiness From these Words I shall insist on this Proposition That Person that has received wonderful Deliverance from Death ought not only to praise God himself but to excite and call upon others to praise God with him And all the Servants of God should be most willing to joyn in the return of thanks for any Mercy