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Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication) |
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A27373
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The mock-duellist, or, The French vallet a comedy acted at the Theatre Royal by His Majesties servants / written by P.B., Gent.
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Belon, P. (Peter)
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1675
(1675)
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Wing B1854; ESTC R22744
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35,449
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70
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mean and me Diana Brother let me advise you strait to go To th' Lady Lovewealth learn if 't were the hopes Of your Uncles Estate made her accept The tender of your services or whether it be A real affection does cause her to have An esteem for your person If the last Inform her how y' are driven Phill. Not amiss So now it works as I would have it just Aside Sir Cog. Sir if you please to honour me so far As to lend me your company t' her house Noble It must be then with these two Ladies leave Sir Cog. I 'll but call by the way at the Rose-tavern Exeunt Ladies Noble In the mean time according to my promise I 'll speak two words at the School in next street Sir Cog. Very well Sir we 'll meet at the Piazza An hour hence Noble Till then your servant Sir Exeunt SCENE III. The School-house Kitty Noble at a window Shift in the street in a fine Garb. Shift NOw I 'm a Prince again in shew at least Hem hem Kitty Hist hist Shift 'T is I is the coast clear Kitty I 'll look about I see none we may fear Why did you stay so long Shift How does my Love Kitty As well as hopes can make me And yet my thinks this day is cruel long Shift It draws towards its end Kitty Does the time hold Shift 'Twixt two and three be sure the â—â—ght be out Our work requires none Kitty How shall we do To get off in the dark the Moon by twelve Will yield us no more light Shift So I would hav 't Kitty It will be very dark how shall I know When you are come or whether it be you Shift Here here secure these half a dozen Keys When I am got up to the Ladder-top I 'll in the Room and seek you in the dark Where when you finde y' are taken by the hand Conclude 't is I. By the help of these Keys I 'll open every door to th' Garden-side And that way we 'll get off Speak not a word Nor whisper then Kitty And where must we go then Not far I hope Shift Only to the Church-porch Where a Parson shall wait to tye the Knot And then Kitty Away away the Beldam comes Shift Farewel till night Kitty shuts the window Exit Shift Kitty Farewel SCENE IV. Noble Crostitch Crost FOr these same reasons Sir a stricter Eye I 've kept upon her actions than before And till some two months since or thereabouts I could not finde she had any commerce Beyond these walls which made me grant to her A little more liberty than before But it could not last long for one bright night About the hour of two I heard a noise On the back-side I stole gently down stairs And there you 'll scarce believe 't Nob. Yes I 'll believe that she has not her like Crost I found the Gentlewoman Letting down of a bucket full of stones Into a Well Nob. How 's that pray full of stones Crost Yes Sir Nob. For what Crost I stood still close behinde And she was so attentive at her work That she perceiv'd me not now mark I pray Anon at th' other end of the Well-rope Up comes what do you think Sir pray you guess Nob. The Devil sure Crost No Sir but one of 's friends Drest in a humane shape a fine young man Who as I thought none but the Devil himself Could have brought there The Gallant spying me Standing behinde twitches the rope she held And gently poises himself down again At this she turns and so espies me out You must needs think she was much discompos'd At the sight of me Nob. I know not what to think Crost Wounderfully she in a laughing tone Cries out E'faith you came i' th' nick of time Or else by this I 'd gin you the go-by With that in a great laughter up she runs Where having lock'd her self she 'gan to sing Oh! Love is a dilicate thing I' th' morning I visited the Well and in it found Towards the middle a window that did answer Into a neighbouring Vault I had a pump Set in the place to prevent for the future Such like attempts Seeing no remedy But close confinement of her in a Room Under good locks and keys I 've mew'd her up Where she does still remain Nob. Cannot be helpt I pray let her not know of my return Till I see you again Till then farewel I see 't is easier the Ocean to span Than keep by force a young maid from a man Exeunt severally ACT III. SCENE I. Crosby as he is going in meets Siss Crosby NOw for to know my doom Your Lady Siss Siss She 's gone to take the Air. Stops the Passage Crosby Come let me in I shall grow angry else Enter Phill. Siss Here comes some Rescue Crosby Your obedient Servant your Woman Madam Deni'd you to me Phill. She did nothing Sir But what she had in charge Crosby Madam 't is like My fate 's the harder that I am ariv'd Upon some newer interest Phill. Your own Was not so considerable Sir before Nor had it so much name you need to fear That any should succeed it Crosby If there be any one dares own a favour That 's to my prejudice let him look Madam You hide him in your bosome if he would not Have this sword through him Phill. Sir you must prescribe No Laws to me that person I shall chuse To throw my favours on shall know to answer Whatever heats you bring Crosby Why be it so Exit Crosby Phill. This care is over Siss A fair riddance doubtless Phill. This is not all I have another plot To bring about my ends 'twixt Madam Phanny And this unworthy man that I must do Or I 've done nothing yet Siss Seriously Madam I pitty that poor Lady at my heart She is so melancholy Phill. Where is she now Siss At her old trade of weeping Phill. I 'll chear her up E're long if things do hit Siss Pray Heavens they may Phill. Let 's in and there consult with her about it Lest we be troubled with this impertinent SCENE II. Champagne solus Champ. CHampagne dis de honneur es un Jewel De grand estimation it is de so pretious de ting Dat mos no bee loss no mos no be loss Den mon revenge Oh! very goot very sweet Par ma foy de hony is no so sweet As de revange to de Frensh Vallet Derefor par consequent you de Estranger Dat give de mee de pas ope de face You moss prepare for de dy no remedee But Monsieur Champagne mee mande pardon In an other tone Mee ask quarter de grace mee no give Change tone again Comment give box de Ear to mee person Enter Slye harkening Ah! Jerny ventre teste come nee I doon Dat mee cope de teste et present de it To mee Maistresse Madamoiselle Lysse Alon mee no longre stay point de quartier
has past 'twixt the Lady and my self Exit Champ. To them Lysse Phill. I finde I am not in the least suspected Aside Sir Cog. Well Lysse what news now Lysse None Sir but good These were his words as well as he could speak Or I them understand Mee Mastre's Mistriss is a Young Lady whose name is Mrs. Kitty Noble Nob. How Kitty Noble say'st thou Lysse Just so Sir This night at three my Master de Rogue and I steel her away and cheat mee Master the fool of his fine Miss by a Ladder of Ropes out of a window next to the Garden-wall at the Boarding-school in our own street He added that this Master was to be disquis'd like a Woman and he he knew not yet This did he jabber in his Gibberish tone Nob. Come come fear nothing Sir all will do well This works as I could wish your assignation At the Lady Lovewealth once at an end If you do not succeed we 'll watch th' old Knight And seize upon that most villanous Rogue That sets him on meerly for his own ends As we may clearly see beyond dispute By Lysse's late intelligence we know the hour And there 's no fear but to compass our ends To Nob. Sir Cog. Madam if that To Phill. Phill. Sir I hope you 'll excuse She interrupts Sir Cog. My absence this night from the Lady Love wealths Sir Cog. And do you leave me Madam Dian. She is not well Phill. I shall wish you good sport and good success Sir Cog. Come Sister you 'll along Phill. Yes she shall go And Lysse too Nob. Come come let 's loose no time Madam your humble Servant To Phill. Sir Cog. Servant Lady Exeunt all but Phill. and Siss Phill. Hast thou got all things ready Siss Madam I have Phill. Cupid prosper and crown this last nights work Siss watch their goings forth and in what dress Sir Coggin is accoutred and when th' are gone Advertise me that we may after them With diligence Surely it is impossible I should be known in a Torch-bearer's habit With such a Mask as will hide all my face Thou being the Lady too Siss I must confess That this change put upon them will help much To your concealment Phill. It will be gone make haste Exit Siss Who 's this that knocks I would not be seen now A knocking I 'll hide the light and then let them in Puts the light out of doors Who 's there Enter Brave Brave A Friend Phill. 'T is more than I know yet Brave I can't help that Sir Coggin is it you Phill. The very same Brave I 'm glad I 've met you Sir though in the dark I have but some few words Phill. Your business pray Brave My business is but short Mr. Crosby From whom I came has desired me to say You had not Sir that Title in Phill. Airy Or any of that worthy Ladies Virtues As he himself has and does hold by right And on the same accompt desires to see you In the Piazza with your sword in hand At six this morning Phill. I 'll wait upon him Sir Brave It will be requisite you take a friend Your Rival honours me Phill. That shall be done Brave I am your Servant Sir Phill. Sir I am yours Exit Brave Now am I challeng'd O! here comes my Second Enter Siss Siss I come to tell you that the coast is clear Phill. Come let us to the Coach and as we go I 'll tell thee the best Jest that ever was Exeunt SCENE III. Lovewealth's house Two Chairs out Lady Lovewealth Per. Clay Clunch Tray Prew Clay A Vadds now do you see my head does ake Like any wild-fire hark you my Lady Now do you keep of all these sorts of Liquors In your own Cellar all the year about Lady Yes yes why not Clay Why then y' are woundy rich What 's your name Prew Prew My name is Prudence Sir Clay I prithy look my head Sets himself on a Chair his legs over the Ladies lap and his dog in his Lady rises in anger discourses with Per. Lady No flesh and bloud Can bear this insolence Clay 'T is very cold Fecks we 'l to Blind-man's-bluff 't will heat us all Clunch shall be hid Clunch Not I I know your tricks Clay I am waggish sometime Lady d' you see And he is wary of me come I 'll hide Clunch I 'll blinde you then Clay No my Lady shall do 't Clunch No no d' you mark me I 'll have no such cheating Clay So o-brave Clunch that calls my Lady cheat Th' art so mistrustful come along simpleton Hold hold Clunch not so hard Clunch blinds him Clunch Is it well now Clay Oye oye d' you see I 'll have no goings out Clunch No no come on They rush upon the Lady Lady Heavens what will this be Per. A cure I hope to your brains and my fortune Aside Clay Have at you Clunch you do not clap your hands I warrant you this was Clunch I taught him that I 'll fit him for 't Clunch lays himself down Clay falls over him Enter Maskers Clunch Ods wowks what have we here Run's away Clay I 'll tell you what if I do catch you Clunch Oh! have I caught you now Clunch Devil Oh! Catches the Wheel barrow runs away crying Per. What 's this insolencie for Lady But Mascarades How his anger â—â—comes him all he doth Has so much grace Clay I would I were a whom Lady I would to Heaven thou had'st never been here Clay Had I know Lady that your house was haunted I 'd ne're a come so far to marry you What do I know d' you see but when we two Were in one bed minding of somewhat else We should have these Hobgobblings come to us And so mar all our sport Pray now how long To the Lady she turns off Has your house been haunted what say you Mouth Won't they hurt Tray nor Clunch nor you nor me Per. Observe they dance After the Dance exeunt all the Maskers but the Wheel-bar Clay Th' are merry Devils fecks Dance here Clunch Hy-day more Devils yet Enter Sir Amorous and Champagne in a Spanish Garb. Dance here Champ. dances a Saraband or Antique Clay Whow Hell 's broke loose Siss Sir if you dare put confidence in me To Sir Cog. Here I protest that in every respect She is to Madam Phill. Airy equal If not to be prefer'd Sir Cog. Well Madam since I must not hope to see the Lady's face Before I 've given my hand and must confess You have been just in all y'have hitherto Declar'd to me my life and fortunes both I put into your hands to dispose of As you shall best think fit Siss Then give me leave To speak you at this time a happy man Some minutes Sir will make you say the same Sir Cog. Madam I am all faith Siss Give me your hand To dispose with your heart as I think fit She gives it to Phill. he starts at the