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A43613 The ceremony-monger his character in five chapters ... with some remarks (in the introduction) upon the new-star-chamber, or late course of the Court of King's Bench, of the nature of a libel, and scandalum magnatum, and in conclusion, hinting at some mathematical untruths and escapes in the common-prayer book, both as to doctrine and discipline, and what bishops, were, are, and should be, and concerning ordination, humbly proposed to the consideration of the Parliament / by E. Hickeringill ... Hickeringill, Edmund, 1631-1708. 1689 (1689) Wing H1799; ESTC R20364 90,871 81

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is the Brains you 'l say of all our Ceremony-Mongers Where do you say They are there where they always were but never Consulted in any of these Illegal and silly Ceremonies further then whether they are like Popish Ceremonies That 's the Test that 's the Testimonial that first gave them Entrance into a Protestant Church and the Papists finely laugh at us and deride us for being their Apes as I have heard the Popish Friers beyond Sea Jear at us for the Mimickry grave English Noddles that have no other Reason not Religion for what they do but that they are the Pope's Baboons in spight of Holy Scripture Right Reason true Religion and the Laws of the Kingdom This confused Noise of the People is not Articulate but an un-intelligible and brutish Braying one Man's Voice drowns the Accent and Articulation of another and therefore is no more Intelligible than the Latine Mass and I suppose that the best Reason that can be given for it is that it keeps the people ignorant if they cannot read of at least one half of the Psalms The next step may be if this be suffered that the people shall read one half of the Chapters two and then though the vulgar cannot kept together from hearing the Scripture they shall be debarr'd one half in time we may go further we are just in the Popish Road that debars the vulgar from the whole Scriptures Read but the 1 Cor. 14.11.23 26.31 33. And if you fear God you will never do so any more Latin Prayers or Prayers in an unknown Tongue or an unintelligible Tongue also are Prophesies or Preachments in an untelligible Tongue by the Confusion of which God is not the Author but the Devil and the Pope invented these Contusions by them to beget the Mother of Popish and Ceremony Mongers Devotion Ignorance For saith St. Paul in that 1 Cor. 14.11 If I know not the Voice I shall be unto him that speaketh a Barbarian and he that speaketh shall be a Barbarian unto me Here is a plain Scripture against this confused Noise no man can know the meaning of a Voice that is not Articulate But what cares a Ceremony Monger for Scripture Give him his God give him his Mammon give him his popish Mimickry but whilst he makes himself a popish Ape he makes dull Englishmen both Apes and Asses All the Reason that ever any of them can give for this profane Folly is that the Singing boys do it and the great Heads do it and therefore the silly people like the Papists say must not we believe and practice as the Church believes and practises meaning by the Church the Clergy the rich the great and the gay Clergy And if this must be a Reason why may we not as well believe and practise as doth the ●ope of Rome as well any old Innocent here at home We talk of h●ting Popery in Italy we do well but not a j●● better for us if we follow the same Implicit Faith in England that the Italians do in Rome Thus the Prophets prophesie falsly and the Priests bear Rule by their means and my people love to have it so and what will ye do in the end thereof Let all things be done to edifying saith the Apostle and ye may all Prophesie or read for if Reading be not Preaching or Prophesing we have abundance of dumb Prophets if it be not a Bull in England 1 Cor. 14.31 Ye may all Prophesie read or preach one by one that all may Learn and all may be comforted Implying evidently that there can be no Learning no comfort no Edification in our confused and banling Superfuelon which is just like the Gossips Chat where all Tongues wag and all are Preachers and no Hearers Since therefore God is not the Author of this Confusion neither Law Canon Edification Rubrick Reason Act of Uniformity Religion nor Scripture to ●ouch it but point blank against all these tell me how it came here except from the Devil and the Pope Short Ejaculations as Amen Lord have Mercy or repeating after the Articulat Voice of the Minister falls not under this Censure But I wonder who taught the Women whose chiefest Beauty is modest Silence who taught them to prate in the Church They are so full of Tongue you 'l say that perhaps a little teaching would serve I never suffered such a confused babling in my Church of All-Saints Let them play the fools and popish Apishness some where else I never would permit them at which abundance of people took Snuff and because they might not be superstitious Apes they would not come there at all a good riddance of them they left the Room to their betters for we want nothing there so much as Room Is there not some fear least we all be beg'd Beg'd For what for wise men No but to replenish the Colledge of Gotham we are topping Fellows if the Pinacles of the Temple stand in view which is the way thither Are we not all as silly as that Cardinal who says Sit ergo Dominus noster papa baculus in aq●d fr●ctus absit tamen ut crederem quod viderim Let our Lord the pop●b a Staff partly in the water seeming crooked yet God forbid that I should believe mine own eyes Like Cardinal Bellarmin who makes Ignorance not Understanding the Ground of Faith Intending surely that none out Coxcombs priest-ridden should be of the Church This Ceremony monger carries one infallible Mark about him you may know him from a thousand for he sets such a Value and price upon his Illegal Trinkets and Ceremonies that if you take them or offer to take them from him he cryes out and roars like mad Micah Ye have taken away my gods which I made and the Priests and ye are gone away and what have I more And what is this that ye say unto me what aileth thee Would it not make a man bellow and cry to lose the Diana's by which he got his Wealth and on which ●o chiefly volues himself because it made him a man of value and those that are his Favourites on whom he puts the greatest Value That Trinket after him in a blind implicite slavish Mimickry and Imitation He that calls for a Reason he is not a man for his turn but sawcy troublesome and petulant Thus the blind lead the blind have a care of the ditch there just before you you had better take warning than tumble in But I fear lapidi loquor I wash a Black Moor I doubt yet I know no harm I do if I do him no no good if the Leopard will keep his Spots I did not make them he is Bedlam mad surely why dost thou strike so furiously I would but unshakle thee and set thee free or make thee set thy self free by representing thy self to thy self For I 'll assure thee that in City and Countrey good Master of the Ceremonies thou hast not amongst rational men more Beholders than Abhorrers Surely thy Ascendant
where the Man Died or else a P●erogative Case by the bona notabila of the value of Five or Ten Pounds old doings there were Wherefore the said Council made a Decre● Can. 6. That no Bishop should be made in a Village or little Town for which one Presbyter might well suffice because it is not necessary to make a Bishop's See there least the Name and Authority be rendred contemptible There were Three Hundred and Fourty Bishops there which exceeded the Number of the General Council of Nice and they took care for the Honour of their own punction yet they add That when the People in a Town shal grow so Numerous a Hundred and Fifty was the Common st●●●or a Presbyter's Care and Cure Then that Village deserves to have a Bishop and ought to have one By this Rule London had need have more than Fourty Bishops And this would wher Industry and make M●u S●udy to be Work-men that need not to be ashamed least the People should never chuse them as of old they did wherea● now if they can but Buy an Advowson or next Avoidance or a Patron c Let the People go whilstle they are their Feeders and Pastors in Spich of their ●eeths But how can Men Rellish what is Cra●n'd down their Throats as Capon 's are serv'd or given them with a Horn like a Drench This makes an Immortal Feud and Disgust generally betwixt the Physi●k's Patients and their Ecclesiastical not Father's but Far●iers that force open their Mouths and pour down what they please thus are the People Treated like Bru●es rather than Men and Christians they are like to be good ones But what cares the Reading Don of the Pulpit He crys I am Instituted and Inducted come to your Parish Church the Horse and the poor A●s must Graze where he is Ty'd I 'le feed you in spight of your Teeth Ay and Starve us too in spright of our Teeth There is neither Reason nor Religion for this If he were never so good a Physitian of Souls all he says is accepred with Prejudice and Disgustful for let his Potion be never so wholesome It goes against any Wife-mans Stomach to be Drench't this is the Fault also of our Con●●●●ution and wonderful are the Inconveniences that follow this as Antmosi●es E●ernal betwixt Minister and People Suits at Law about his Maintenance for they Pay as they Heat only so much as they are forc't to and as for the Care of their Souls they 'l trust him no more than they will their Bo●ies with a Physi●ian of another Mans choosing Patron 's will lose nothing by parting with their Advowson's not a Farthing honestly yes you 'le say he may make it a Portion for his Daughter or to his Waiting-Maid to a poor Parson that will Leap at her But this is the worst of Simonies and such never thrives no more than other Symonists a Curie attends it and blasts all this Smock Symony In other Symonies Money makes the Mare to go but in th● the J●de make the Par●on Ride that must otherwise have gone on Foot. Besides the most of the Livings in England are in the Kings Gift At the Chancellours or the Bishops or the Universities few have private Patron 's except Noblemen Gentlemen and Papists the former are all t●o Noble to C●yn their Advowion's and the l●st the Papi●is are very unfit nay they are by Law Inc●p●c●ared after Conviction I● is certain that wherever the Carcase is there will the Eagles be g●thered together every Man that is at a lo●s for Preferment or for great●r Preferment will be sure to inquire which is the way thither And if Sym●ny Smock Symony or a Ceremony be the way and the Doo● thither the Clergy make Application it is their great Aim and Study thence comes the common Ignorance Lazin●●● D●ed and Duil Freaching or rather Reading because it is ●asie most in equest with the great D●n's that can do not better and is therefore more acceptable than the best But If you make Merit the only way to preferment then you will ha●● a 〈◊〉 Learned Loving and Lovely Clergy that will go H●nd in Hand and Heart in Heart with their People and nothing though● 〈◊〉 good for them but now what they get is only got with Scrambling in all places especially in ●luraliti●s By Pluralitles I do not mean Two or Three Parishes for one Pa●ish may be Ten times more a Plurality as S. And●●ws Ho●●born than Twenty Norfolk or Essex Livings in some Places And I wish that the Right Reverend Clergy man who was so Sa●acious at some little Animals are to leave the failing House and the efore left his Seat in the High Commission Court least i● he stay'd any longer it had fallen upon his Head would also be as Sag●cious as to leave his Inco●sistent Pluralities what Sence is it for a Bishop to be a Deacon For the due joining of which two words in Coustruction Subintelli●itur Avaritia And by way of Parenthesis now I have Named that High Commission Court I cannot but remember one word used by my old F●iend Lord Jeffery soon after in my Lord of London's case repeated viz. ●●ptim we do all things here quo●h he Raptim rashly in ha●●e without thinking without consi●eration without W●●●ing without so much as a Clark or Register Ay the Wiser for litera Scripta Manet but enough of that and of Bishops at present CHAP. IV. Of Ordination c. I Never could understand any thing by Ordination but what Arch bishop Cr●nmer makes it a setting apart Bishops as a Constable a Justice or a Judge is Ordain'd for some special work And the grea●er and more Sacred the work is the greater and more Sacred is the Ordination The Church the whole Church did this in the Gospel Times and long after so sayes Ierom. Requiricur in Sa●●dote ordinando etiam populi praesentia the Peoples presence is necessary when men are Ordain'd not as here by a Mockery of this Ancient Cu●tom Ordaining Men in a Congregation who are as Ignorant as the Bishop in Reference to their Person Conversations Learning or Abil●les but in the Pur●st and Primitive Times they were always O●●a●n'd by the Church as well as in the Church and sometimes by Laying on of H●nds of the P●esbytery alone as Titus and sometimes by the whole Church as Barnabas and Paul the Laying on ●f H●nds was only a Jewish Custom or Ceremony Pointing out the Persion Ordain'd It was not the hands did any thing none are so foolish to think that ●x●ept Vertue could go out by touching as when our Saviour touchen the Woman not willingly which had an Issue of Blood none are so Blasphemously silly as to pretend h●t indeed the ●ign is taken often for the thing S●gnified as for this C●use Bow I the Knee to the Fa●her and sine stantibus non staret mundus and neglect not the Gift of God that was given thee by the Laying on of the H●nds of the
haste but we have had time to 'mend it Yes but those that Steer'd then must have acknowledged their Frailty Weakness and Mortality which flesh and blood cannot deny but is most unwilling to grant and coufess which Popish English not Italian pride I fear will put in a Caveat as formerly against Reformation Never could any Bishop or Priest with whom I ever yet did discourse the point either here or beyond Sea alledge any Reason why the Presbyters should not be helps in Government rather than filly and Rascally Registers Sumners Officials Canonists c. except that the work being divided amongst his Brethren in time the Wages would be divided also whereas the other Free-booters Ecclesiastical or rather Mongrels party-per-pale Lay-Elders went no purchase no pay and perhaps gave Money too to purchase such a spiritual Letter of Mart Ay and get good Booty too by the Venture In short such monstrously bulky Bishopricks as now we have has formerly been found too dangerously big for the King and Kingdom as well as uneasie for the people and like a Shoe too big useless except it be stuft out with those said refuse Stuff and Excrements Sumners Registers c. or if a great Shoe be too disparaging and disagreeing Metaphor for such High-Top-Knots Ecclesiastical the Pride as well ●s the Mode of our High Church Man 〈◊〉 compare them to the poor 〈◊〉 that has got the 〈◊〉 which 〈◊〉 the poor Limbs to make a monstrous great Head stuft like a Bladder sometimes with more Wind and Vapour than Brains Verifying the Proverb A great Head and little 〈◊〉 not that the Diverb is always true but it is often so when a Whore or a Jesuite made that great Head so that the Head had never grown so Ghastful a Portent had it not been for a very carnal Heart Me thinks it looks like Tom a Lincoln the great Cathedral Bell there too big for use or to call men to Church it would well make ten good and useful Bells if well Cast whereas now it serves for nothing but a show and only the name Rings all the Kingdom over but good for nothing but to be gaz'd at and admir'd by Women and Fools for its huge Dimensions And is certainly a too much overgrown thing since the days of the Martyr Ignatius Bishop of Antioch and contemporary with some of the Apostles when he says Every Altar should have a Bishop meaning certainly a Presbyter or something very little different Nay in his Epist ad Smyr he says It is not lawful without the Bishop to Baptize or hold a love Feast or any Ecclesiastical Assembly c. Certainly then a Bishop was not Omnipresent or an Ubiquitarian or else nothing like to the Bishops Office at this day amongst us performed Shall we call those separate Congregations Schisms from the Catholick Church when they keep to the Primitive Rule from which our Constitution has swerv'd What Vote Avarice and Ambition had in making such a Constitution by President from the Hierarchy of Rome let others judge I shall not Dogmatically determine But some say Tho' the Bishop cannot see from the Cathedral what is done all over the County Shires and Towns of his Diocess yet he can Ride about and go the Rounds and Visite them and so he is bound to Go or Ride once in three years And what Improvement is made by such Triennial Visits in any thing except his Purse and the thing he calls Confirmation Can he possibly be a sufficient Shepherd and Bishop of Souls or Physitian of Souls that has not so much as spoke with or visited one of a thousand in his Diocess Nay grant that he do nothing else all the year if it be not a Parliament year but visit his Flock we 'll grant him for every Town Village or Parish two or three days in one year and by that account in that two days he cannot have Examin'd above the tenth part or Tyth of the Parish nor heard their Causes and Complaints for above one tenth part and what shall become of the other nine Nay what shall become of that same tenth part till the next years visit the Patient may be dead in that time as well as all the nine that get no relief from his Episcopal hands Oh! but other Curates Journey-men and Apparitors c. do the Work for him that Surrogated folly has been sufficiently Answered already not but that sometimes he may by Implicite Faith shooting at Rovers hit the mark but it is no the Blind-man shot the Crow more by Luck than by Wit. In short when a bounteous Prince publishes the Bines betwixt a nee dy greedy Doctor and a great Fat Bulky Unweildy Bishoprick the Match is food made up generally tho' Conscience ●arried a little at the Tremendous Account and impossibility and impotency of performance does whisperingly perhaps forbid the Banes Avarice and Ambition are leud and loud Speakers and can soon silence the Whisper of a Conscience that like some drowsie Judge is scarcely awake when he passes Sentence And the Contract once Solemnized publickly in the Church the Divorce is not so easie No Is not the Divorce easie in case of Impotence and Impossibility of giving the Church due benevolence the only design and end of such a Contract The Civilians cheat us if such an impotence be not a sufficient a lawful and necessary cause of divorce Nay worse it is some say ipso facto void where there is Error personae or not a sic man for the turn But I 'le urge no Parabolical Arguments so far as of I lift I can make them go if before God and in foro Conscientiae they can answer it I leave them to those two Judges Is it any wonder to see a Church barren and unfruitful of any thing but Puppet-like and Apish as well as irrational Ceremonies superficial and perfunctory Devotions the only fruits of such Decrepit Sons of the Church which are begot when impotency is supply'd by Fumbling Registers Apparitors Lay-Chancetours or Lay Elders and forsworn Church-Warde● Sr. Paul indeed had upon him the care of all the Churches namely to advise them and leave Presbyters and Bishops to Guide Rule and Feed them but did not Excommunicere or Ordain by implicite Faith When Presbyters were Ordain'd he left the whole Government and Management of the Church to their care and prudence but he never undertook the Load of a whole County two or three upon his own single Shoulders least with such a Weight he could never mount Heaven but 〈◊〉 be cast down to the nethermost Hell and become a cast-away by Male-Administration and Impossibility of performing that Office and Undertaking The Apostle himself could not manage a Plurality A Plurality What 's that Not such a thing as it is commonly taken and accepted to be viz. two or three poor Parishes for one Perish such as St. Andrews-Holborn has twenty times more people than twenty Countrey Parishes so unequally are Parishes divided both 〈◊〉