generous constancy The printed sheets of this my unlucky Book I was forced to redeem with a summe of money choosing to do so rather than spend money in an uncerttain Law-suit and being Master of them I endeavoured to finish the Book that I might raise money to discharge my self from the 50 l. for which I was engaged and to that end I had disbursed all the ready money I could raise but before I could perfect my intentions I was arrested for it and clapt up into Prison I thought it severe dealings to be arrested by my fellow Citizen without any notice when as I did not conceal my self but was every day to be found and spoken with but so it was and I was confined six dayes in an absolute uncertainty for what for I could not possibly all that time get my Adversary to come to me or send me word what was owing It was resolved I should suffer and so I did with much patience till at length my inportunity prevailed and I knew what I was to pay this much satisfyed me and indeed then my Adversary was extreamly civil and upon reasonable terms discharged me and I design and hope ere long to be wholly discharged from that debt which I thank God is the only debt I was ever bound for and is the only bond that remains unpaid by me so that I may and do again hope for lucky dayes I fear nothing but the anger of some great men who are displeased with my charitable inclination and because I endeavour to do good they imagine evil against me but I hope he who is the Ruler of all hearts will change theirs and incline them to let me live out the rest of my dayes in peace I design nothing but quiet not to disturb or prejudice any I have had many changes in my fortune I have lived in many places in and about London by my last misfortune at the three Kings on Ludgate hill but am now by a strange providence come to live in the same house where I drew my first breath and this present day it is forty one years since I was born there there I would willingly spend the residue of my dayes that I may be near the place where I intend to have my bones laid with those of my nearest Relations This is my design and desire but although we know where we began we know not where we shall end our lives and no man can reckon himself happy before his death If I cannot attain to that happiness or quiet in this life which I desire I hope I shall in the next and if God shall spare me with life and thou dost accept of this Treatise I shall prosecute it with various storyes of my misforune designing all for the glory of God and the good of my charitable Reader this is the utmost ambition of Thy Friend F. K. August 23. 1673. To the Reader instead of the Errata IF you have read the Preface you will find that the Authour and this Book have both been so unlulucky as to fall into Knaves handling from whence with much cost and trouble they are but lately redeemed the one at present freed and the other which much ado finished but not so perfect as was intended for it it hath been such an unlucky extravagant as to wander to four Printing houses whereas it was designed to be printed at one by which means it hath gathered more faults and errata's then ordinary Indeed the Book is wholly composed of the errata's of the Authour to which the Printers have added so many that they are not easily to be corrected wherefore as the Authour hath here exposed the faults and errata's of his Life to your view that by them you may correct and amend your selves so the Printers are necessitated to leave their errata's to your correction and amendment without which you will hardly understand the true sence of the Authour who adds this request to his former promising amendment for the future THE UNLUCKY CITIZEN CHAP. I. The Author gives his Reason for the Title Unlucky Citizen and his intended manner of Writing He treats of Lucky and unlucky Persons in general and reflecting on his own particular Misfortunes resolves to give an Account of them BEfore I begin my intended Discourse it will not be amiss to say somewhat about the Title of it and why I call it the Unlucky Citizen Truly my Reason in my Opinion is very good and in short thus You will find the whole Subject of this Treatise to consist in a plain Recital of my Misfortunes which I may very well tearm Unlucky and I apply them to the Word Citizen because such an one I am being so born and bred And as he is reckoned to be a right Gentleman that is so by three Discents so I by that Rule may reckon my self to be a right Citizen and most if not all the Misfortunes that have happened to me were in or near the City within the Sound of Bow Bell And therefore the Scene lying there and my Quality being such I may not unfitly tearm it Citizen And now having in few words satisfied you in my Reason of the Title I shall fall upon the matter in Hand but I must tell you that you must nor expect any laborious Piece or rhetorical Expressions you shall not find my English Greek here nor hard cramping Words such as will stop you in the middle of your Story to consider what is meant by them you may read all that is here written without the use of a Dictionary you shall need none no not so much as an English one and the Truth is if I had a mind to confound you with hard Tearms I 'le assure you I cannot having not been bred so good a Scholar Here you shall onely read a plain Story such as you would have told for I intend to write as freely and as naturally as I would tell a Tale to you and such kind of Language I think to be the fittest for this Discourse which thus I shall begin Not long since it was my Fortune whether good or ill I know not to drink a Glass of Wine with an old Acquaintance I know not yet whether I may tearm him Friend and he having lately fallen into a very deep Misfortune from which he was not then disengaged was therefore complaining of his hard Fortune I hearing him thus complain for one bad Bargain for to my knowledge he had lately much inbettered his Condition in the Main and knowing my self to be much more unfortunate than he for I presently told him of many Losses and Crosses had happened unto me since I last saw him I therefore made slight of his present Mishap and he and I discoursing upon that Subject he recited to me these two Lines The lucky have their Days and those they chuse The unlucky have but hours those they loose I was very much taken with the Sence of these two Lines and the consideration
therefore I withdrawing to my Quarters went to Bed there I ruminated and considered with my self what I should do and it was long e're I could fix upon any thing I had my pocket pretty well furnished with Money and as long as that lasted I resolved to continue my Ramble and not knowing whither to go for I was no great Traveller having never been above three Miles from London except to Windsor as aforesaid and therefore I concluded to go thither again and it may be as my mind served to go a little further I had been there lately before but it was on foot but now I intended to go Gentleman like on Horseback I told the Cook my Landlord of my Design and he knowing I had no business there wondered at me but he considered that as I was upon the Ramble I was never out of my way I had told him of my purpose because I would have him get me a Horse or pass his word for one but he not knowing my intent and doubting that I might wander further and it may be sell the Horse and so leave him the Horse to hold to pay for a Horse he desired to be excused he told me that I needed not have any body pass their words for me since I had a Watch in my Pocket which would be a very good pawn and that never shames his Master and if I would leave that he would speak to a friend to furnish me with a pretty Nag I was vext to think I must part with my Watch my pride for that was my best Gentility but such a desire I had to be a Cock horse that I consented and then going to his friends Stable we agreed all matters thus I gave twelve shillings for the use of the Horse for six days for so long I supposed to stay out and left my Watch for security of the Horse which I suppose was worth about fifty shillings so that what would come the owner was sure to lose nothing if I staid longer than six days I was to pay further two shillings a day And thus was I fitted with a Horse and I reckoned that if I staid out to spend all my Money yet I had a Watch at my return would yield me more and these being my thoughts and resolves the next day I began my journey I mounted nimbly and rod on couragiously but whether the Cook for some ends of his own gave intelligence or how it hapned I know not but I was prevented of my journey for alighting in a Street in London at a Milliners Shop to buy me some Ribbonds for my Hat I let my horse stand at the Door but he was soon seized on for my Father took hold of his Bridle and gave it to my Brother a Boy that was at hand and seized me fast by the Arm. CHAP. IX He is discharged from his Master descants upon that Action describes the cunningness and hypocrisie of his Mother-in-law and is placed with a second Master ANd now Reader judge you if I was not in a pitiful pickle and if I did not think my self to be in a sad condition the truth on 't is I expected my Father would first have fallen about my ears and buffeted me soundly then send for a Constable and drag me to my Masters with a hundred Boys at my heels for I saw some such kind of cattle some of the young fry gather about the door and then carry me before a Justice send me to Bridewel all these things and worse came into my head so that I thought before night I should be beating Hemp. All this I expected and indeed well deserved but to prevent it my whole study was to give my Father the slip and shew him a pair of heels but there was no need of any of all this matters went much better than I thought on for my Father was in a good humour and not at all so passionate as I supposed for as I said he taking me by the arm led me further into the Shop and then he thus began Son whither in Gods Name are you going is not your Ramble done yet sure you should be weary of this course of life fie fie Son I am ashamed to think you should have so little Wiâ— or Grace to give me so much trouble to hunt after you in this manner These were the words which he in very moderate manner spake to me and theâ— he was silent expecting my answer But I because I could not give a good or a wise Answer gave none but continuing silent he proceeded Do you think you have not done well and wisely in leaving your Master in this manner can you give me any reason for it I hearing him proceed thus moderately thought it would not be amiss to say somewhat and therefore I replyed That I had reason enough to leave my Master because I was abused and wronged Well said my Father suppose you were wronged must you be your own Judge and because things were amiss must you make them worse by these unlawful courses it is not well done indeed but come said he I 'le see and set all to rights if I can if you will be ruled by me all may be well again My Father by this time had with his sober and tender expressions so mollified me that I could hardly forbear putting finger in eye which he seeing and finding me flexible again asked me if I would be ruled by him Yes Sir said I Well then said he you shall go home with me and I will take a time to go to your Master I hearing that I might go to his house and not to my Masters was well enough contented and so my Father and I walked homewards and my Brother by my Fathers directions went with the Horse from whence he came so that I did verily believe that the Cook my Landlord had betraied me I went home with my Father where I had not much said to terrifie or affright me My Mother in law telling me that she was glad to see me and all was as fair and smooth as could be I having eaten and drunk with them at convenient times went to Bed it was then when I was alone that I had time to consider what condition I was in and the consideration of it very much troubled me But however my Father being so fair I intended to leave all to his discreet management I have several times since considered the great fear I was in all the time of my Ramble of meeting with my Master or Father no deep indebted and almost bankrupt Citizen could be in greater fear of a Serjeant or Bailiff I went no where if in the day time but I had my eyes every way I looked fore-right and on each side me and oftentimes behind me if any person brushed by me my heart was presently at my Mouth thinking that it was one of them that came to seize me if I heard any making haste after me I mended my pace
made in one sheet of Paper in a blind manner written by the Servant in the House and onely witnessed by him who was known to be her great Confident who was employed by her to go down and see her Husband buried and be sure to bring up the Seal-Ring with which the Will was sealed and so he being returned the Will was produced and in it after a few ceremonial words were these or to this effect I give and bequeath to my living Wife all these my two Tenements situate c. for the term of her natural life and after her decease I give them to my two Daughters and their Heirs c. Here she and hers were provided for but not one word of his Sons in all the Will The Son seeing this demands an account of the personal Estate but a small matter comes to his share she sweeps away two thirds of it one as her due by the Custome of the City and another as her due in regard her Husband had not otherwise given or disposed of it by Will And now let me tell the Reader by way of Caution what it may be he is not as yet acquainted withal That a Citizen of London if he hath a Wife and Children can give away but one third part of his personal Estate One third part his Wife will have another third part his Children will have and the other third he may dispose of as he pleases either to Wife or Children or Strangers as he thinks fit If he dies without a Will or such a one as does not dispose of his third then it goes to his Wife as she is Administratrix and this was the Case of this Citizen who although he died possessed of an Estate of Free-hold worth five or six hundred pounds and six hundred pounds personal Estate yet a small matter came to his Sons for the Free-hold is gone as I told you and the personal Estate consisting of six hundred pounds being to be divided she hath four hundred pounds for her two thirds and then two hundred pounds being to be divided amongst five his three Sons and her two Daughters for they came in for a share equal with the rest the Sons have just forty pounds a piece and this is all they were like to have of the Estate The eldest Son being told that he had foul play shew'd him and believing it he flutter'd and went to Law to overthrow the Will but to no purpose she had the better Purse and such a Witness on her side as did not flinch from her so that all the young mans endeavours were in vain he onely made himself worse by spending his Money and at last was forced to be satisfied though he was not contented for in short time after discontent broke his heart This and all the former passages have been related to me and I am apt to believe the truth of them all because I have found the whole state and business to be answerable to so wicked purposes for although she enjoyed all during her life yet since that their Children are dead except one the most inconsiderable of all and nothing is left of them no not remembrance his Children did live and arrive to very considerable Estates but are all since dead and their Estates gone and now her Estate is in the hands of strangers and that Servant who was her Confident did never thrive in body or Estate dying long since in want and poverty This was the Woman that was my Mother-in law and she was likely enough to be too cunning for me having passed through these Projects with so much success My Father had married her upon small acquaintance and knew none of her Actings he had not enquired and therefore knowing nothing believed all to be aright she had a considerable Estate and that was as much as he aimed at that being the chief care of most thriving Citizens to enquire into that and afterwards to deal with them as cunningly as they can I being come home to my Fathers my Mother-in law made very fair weather to me and gave me many good words telling me That she had already and would again speak to my Father in my behalf and to please me the better she was propounding a Match for me with one of her Daughters she having three would talk of matching them to me and my two Brothers for that was our stock there being no Sisters All these kind of pleasing Discourses she would have in my Fathers absence and before his and my face she would incline somewhat to my side and take my part by this I supposed she was my real friend but I found it otherwise as I shall presently tell you I lying in the Garret over the Chamber where my Father and she lay and one night hearing them in some earnest discourse I supposing it might concern me and therefore being desirous to understand what was said I arose and went down Stairs to their Chamber door and laying my ear thereto I could hear her tongue utter these words In good truth now Husband if you humour your Son in this manner you will undo him and your self too for if he find that he can thus rule you he will stay with no Master you can put him to nay and he will run out and make you pay for it he will weary you Is it not far better to pack him away to Sea for he will never do well with any Master here do you think that he will serve out his time with any Master that would not stay where he was so well used Let him to Sea I say the Sea and the Gallows refuse none let him bite on the Bridle he deserves it If my other Husband had not been ruled by me in the disposing and ordering of his Son he would have destroied his Estate and broke his heart too but he took my counsel and sent him to Sea and then when he came back he was content with any thing You have been continued she at the charge to put him to Apprentice and gave a good portion with him that is lost and now he is ready for another for who will take him without Money and he will stay at another place as many nights as days and then you will be to seek again and be continually troubled with him My Father had lain still and given her the full hearing of all she had uttered and so had I too but not without cursing her for a dissembling hypocritical Gypsie but she having done my Father then made this reply But Lamb you mistake the matter quite things are not so bad as you suppose them nor my Son as I hope so bad as you think him he was a little wronged at his Masters though he ought not for that cause to have left his service but his Master gain'd little by the Bargain for he hath paid back good part of the Money he had with him and that will be sufficient to place him any where
might have had a Wife with a considerable Portion offered me my Father assisting me and imparting some of his Estate to me whereas now I mist of all these blessings for when I went to set up for my self which was about eighteen Months after I was forced to be contented with a little Dog-hole of a Shop at the utmost Skirts of London where being wholly a Stranger I could not expect any considerable Practice for who would trust such a Scapperbâ—yling young Giddy braind Coxcomb as I was None but Fools and Mad-men or such young Scatterbrains as my self who alas had little employ for a Scrivener I could onely expect to write a Letter for a Seamans Wife or Sweet-heart and now and then make a Letter of Attorney or a Deed of Gift Deed of Shift I should say or some such Twelve penny Jobbs and this was my Lot this was my Fortune or rather my unlucky Fate thus at one Cast to lose all these good things and fall into all these and many more Evils which I shall hereafter acquaint you with wherefore let me here conclude my Story and Chapter together I left my Master and so became Unlucky CHAP. V. Having left his Master and being on his Ramble he happeneth oâ— strange Company and a more strange Adventure in an Inn which occasioneth the recital of some pleasant Novels Chap. 5 He being gone I did not take much time to consider what was best to be done for I was resolved to proceed in my Voyage and have a little sport and pleasure and took his being returned from out of the Countrey to be a very good providence for me for I judged I should be the welcomer to those friends I intended to visit and did suppose that my Father understanding I was gone to look him would not take it much amiss and that he would in my absence discourse with my Master and it may be conclude upon terms to my advantage These were my thoughts and therefore having taken a Boat which was ready to put off away we went ten Miles we were carried by water and then I intended to foot it for it was to Windsor the same place where I had formerly escaped drowning and now being on shore I found there was three of the Passengers viz. two Men and a Woman that were to go to the same place and intended to foot it as I did whereupon being glad of each others company away we put on we travelled very merrily I cast away care and was blith and bonny for having Money in my Pocket I thought my self to be as good a man as the best One of the two Men was somewhat melancholly and he told us the cause was thus Said he It is not three Months since I travelled this way with a merrier heart and better Equipage for I being a Citizen of London went bravely mounted and accoutred travelling all the West parts of England where I dealt to visit my Chapmen and gather in Moneys which I did in a good moderate manner but not so considerably as the necessity of my Affairs required for no sooner was I come to London but I had all my Creditors came upon me and dunn'd me so desperately that all that I could do at present did little with them so that I had Actions daily and at length a Statute of Bankrupt came upon me that like a Deluge swept away all onely I saved one Chapmans Book and thereby have some hopes that those Chapmen that owe me Money and which my Creditors know not of will be so honest and kind to me as to pay me with which I intend to set up in some other place He having told his Tale I looked earnestly upon him and could not ghess him to be what he said he was a Citizen for he was in a very different Habit being Forrester like cloathed all in green but he assuring me that the Case was just so and relating to me several particulars of his Misfortune I concluded him to be an Unlucky Citizen With this my Green Citizen and the other man who was a London Cook and his Wife we designing all for one place Windsor and having come by Water to Brainford and now having two Miles to Hounstoe I was resolved to continue my Journey but we all concluded to stop there for that Night and the next morning to proceed on our way wherefore we took up our Quarters at an Inn and having eaten our Supper went to Bed the Man and his Wife in one Bed and I and the green Citizen in another I having cast away care slept soundly till it was near morning when I was disturbed with a very loud and shrill Shriek and the noise of womens tongues which immediately followed and were indeed mixed with it I being thus awakened listned to hear what was the matter but although the noise was close by as but in the Gallery at our Chamber door yet I could understand but little what they said and less what they meant but the Cooks Wife who lay with her Husband in the same Chamber with us told him that if she were not mistaken she knew the voice of one of them and therefore she would rise to see what was the matter so thereupon slipping on her Pettycoats and Shooes opening our Chamber door went to them when she was come thither one of the women seeing her began to shriek out again but our Chamber-fellow told her she needed not fear for it was she her Neighbour O Lord Neighbour said the other I have bin almost frighted out of my wits so be like said the Cooks Wife you would not have made so great a noise else By this time several other Guests of the House being awakened with the clamor were also come to see what was the matter whereupon our Cooks Wife being a witty Baggage and being less concern'd than the rest and therefore her judgment more free to know what was most convenient desired all the parties concern'd to take their Chambers or some one Chamber to retire from the company for the woman who seemed to be most frighted was almost naked this proposition being thought convenient they went into a Chamber and the strangers retired onely our Cooks Wife staid with them This passage I heard as I lay in Bed and now it being day light we all arose and our Cooks Wife came into our Chamber to put on her Clothes we all asked her What was the matter But she could not tell us for laughing we wondring at what had hapned importuned her to acquaint us with the Adventure she answered she could not do it fully as yet but did not question but she should by and by and all that we could get from her at present was that two Women were scar'd with living Ghosts this was all she told us and so having hastily dress'd her self she went again to her affrighted Acquaintance and I being curious to know the truth of this Affair went into their company but I
was never the wiser all that I could observe was that the Company consisted of an old Man a Citizen two young Women and two young Men who although they kept at a distance from the rest and they two were like Strangers to one another yet I supposed that they were somewhat concerned with the Women I found that although one of the Women and one of the Men had designed to go with the Carrier to London yet they did not telling him that they would go by Water this was all I could discover while we staid there but we having broken our Fasts and being resolved on our Journey away we marched no sooner had we left the Town on our Backs and we entred Hounsloe Heath but we all three at once renewed our Requests to the Cooks Wife to acquaint us with the truth of the Adventure she laughing refused us and our nor her Husbands importunity would not for a long time prevail but at length we so importuned her that she consented but when she went to begin she could not say one word for laughing this heightned our expectations and much concerned we were to know that which for a long time she could not tell us but at length having settled her self and bethinking what she should say and how to begin she did it in this manner I know not whether I shall give you the satisfaction you expect for I 'le assure you though I think I know all my self yet what I do know is so confused that I can hardly tell how to begin my Discourse nor when I have begun how to continue it in any Method to your satisfaction but if you 'l take the good Will for the Deed I shall give you all the content that I can And thus said she it is I suppose said she to her Husband that you know that two of the Parties viz. the old man and one of the young women are Mr. such a one and his Wife our Neighbours yes replied the Cook and I understand the other young woman is her Sister and this is all I know or can understand although I believe the two young men are of their company you are in the right said the Good-wife and now you know thus much I will tell you the rest One of these two young men continued she is a Sweet-heart or Servant what you please to tearm it of the old mans Wife and hath courted her for enjoyment whether they were ever at the sport or no formerly I know not but last night I believe they were for I understand the matter to be thus This young woman having agreed to content her Servant and they intending to have a Frollick together she hath perswaded the old man her Husband to give her leave to take a journey into the Countrey to see her Sister which is the other young woman the Husband for a long time either refused her or made excuses that he would in short time spare so much time as to go with her but she not being desirous of his company had purposely ask'd him at the time of his greatest imploy when he could not be spared from his business and did importune him so much that in the end she gained his consent and he like a loving Husband since he could not spare time to go with her all the journey did however resolve to accompany her the first days journey and there to leave her to travel with other good company She acquainted her Gallant with this Agreement and they two concluded that so soon as the old man her Husband left her he should meet her and accompany her the rest of the journey where they passing for Man and Wife might lie together upon the way and frollick it to their own hearts content Thus I understand was this Design laid and yesterday it was put in execution for the old man and his Wife came last night to our Inn as you well know and were there met by the young man the Gallant who although he seemed before her Husband not to know her but yet they had together their private Conference and he not having patience to stay till the old man left her importuned her so hardly that in the end his Lodging-Chamber being near hers she promised to take her opportunity and leaving the old Mans Bed come to Bed to him In order to which she thus managed her Affairs The old Man was very weary with his unaccustomed travel and withal sleepy desirous to go to Bed but she kept him up pretending much care and love of his Health made him drink mull'd Sack and when he was in Bed caused him to eat a Sack-posset and all such kind of things as intricating his Brain should cause him to sleep the more soundly she had her desires for no sooner was his Head laid on his Pillow but he fell asleep and although she made haste to undress her self yet when she came to Bed he snored and was as fast as a Pillar she lay still for some time but he sleeping on and she attempting to wake him but in vain she thought it a convenient time to perform her promise with her Gallant wherefore turning out of the Bed and onely putting on a white Smock-pettycoat she left her Husband asleep and leaving her Chamber door put to a char she went to her Gallants Chamber door and found that in the same condition and him ready to receive her she without many perswasions went to Bed to him but what they did together or whether he pleased her or not I 'le leave you to consider and judge for there she staid until it was almost morning and then in the same Equipage she left his Bed and Chamber to go to her Husbands but although it was not far off in the same Gallery yet just as she was at our Chamber door being in the middle way she was met by a man who having a Candle in his hand was followed by a woman in a countrey Habit ready dress'd she seeing this and looking earnestly on the Countrey-womans face and withal knowing it for it was her Sister that very Sister she was going to visit she being amazed at the encounter gave a great Shriek The Countrey woman hearing the Shriek partly knowing the voice and with earnestness looking on the face and seeing it all in white did also shriek out You may imagine the cause of both their shrieking for the old Mans Wife seeing her Countrey Sister at that time and place thought it was her Ghost which came to meet and chide her for playing that foul play 〈◊〉 her Husband which she had so lately done And on the other hand the Countrey Sister being of the same Mettle for there was never a Barrel better Herring who had also been guilty of the same fault for she as well as her City Sister had had her Gallant not onely that night but many more during all the journey having set out from the good Countreyman her Husband upon