schoolfellow_n addict_v themselves_o for_o some_o year_n he_o spend_v most_o of_o that_o time_n which_o he_o have_v vacant_a and_o can_v redeem_v from_o his_o oblige_a attendance_n upon_o the_o school_n his_o judicious_a master_n discern_v in_o he_o a_o ready_a natural_a capacity_n for_o learning_n and_o desire_n after_o it_o with_o industrious_a diligence_n in_o study_n for_o though_o he_o spend_v so_o great_a a_o part_n of_o his_o time_n out_o of_o school_n in_o read_v history_n yet_o withal_o he_o so_o perform_v his_o part_n and_o office_n in_o the_o school_n as_o he_o never_o give_v occasion_n of_o correction_n or_o rebuke_n and_o observe_v moreover_o his_o constant_a daily_a attendance_n on_o the_o worship_n of_o god_n according_a to_o the_o rule_n of_o the_o school_n he_o earnest_o commend_v he_o to_o his_o mother_n and_o persuade_v she_o to_o think_v of_o no_o other_o course_n or_o trade_n of_o life_n for_o he_o but_o that_o he_o be_v prepare_v and_o send_v to_o the_o 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upward_o in_o which_o time_n he_o discharge_v the_o office_n of_o steward_n to_o the_o temporal_a of_o catechist_n and_o conduct_v to_o the_o spiritual_a advantage_n of_o that_o society_n here_o it_o be_v that_o the_o lord_n train_v up_o this_o his_o disciple_n to_o be_v a_o scribe_n instruct_v for_o the_o kingdom_n of_o god_n furnish_v he_o so_o plentiful_o with_o divine_a and_o spiritual_a knowledge_n which_o he_o gain_v as_o well_o by_o experience_n and_o observation_n of_o god_n deal_v with_o he_o and_o the_o operation_n of_o his_o spirit_n upon_o his_o heart_n as_o by_o industrious_a study_n and_o meditation_n that_o he_o can_v ready_o bring_v forth_o out_o of_o his_o treasure_n thing_n new_a and_o old_a be_v able_a to_o speak_v pertinent_o suitable_o and_o seasonable_o to_o the_o various_a capacity_n condition_n and_o case_n of_o saint_n and_o sinner_n and_o become_v a_o happy_a powerful_a instrument_n in_o the_o hand_n of_o god_n for_o the_o conversion_n edification_n consolation_n and_o salvation_n of_o many_o soul_n his_o design_n and_o desire_n be_v to_o serve_v the_o lord_n jesus_n christ_n in_o the_o office_n and_o work_n of_o the_o ministry_n he_o direct_v the_o course_n of_o his_o study_n with_o special_a respect_n to_o that_o service_n and_o though_o his_o place_n and_o exercise_n in_o the_o university_n oblige_v he_o to_o the_o study_n of_o philosophy_n wherein_o he_o be_v equal_a to_o most_o yet_o the_o study_n of_o divinity_n be_v his_o 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d not_o satisfy_v himself_o with_o the_o read_n of_o the_o elaborate_a write_n of_o the_o most_o learned_a divine_n wherewith_o he_o furnish_v his_o library_n at_o the_o expense_n of_o some_o hundred_o of_o pound_n he_o especial_o addict_v himself_o to_o the_o read_n and_o study_v of_o the_o holy_a scripture_n as_o contain_v the_o whole_a counsel_n of_o god_n which_o as_o his_o minister_n he_o be_v to_o declare_v to_o man_n which_o course_n of_o his_o study_n god_n so_o succeed_v with_o his_o blessing_n that_o it_o may_v be_v true_o say_v of_o he_o what_o st._n luke_n say_v of_o apollo_n act._n 18._o 24._o he_o be_v mighty_a in_o the_o scripture_n his_o head_n memory_n heart_n and_o tongue_n be_v full_a of_o the_o scripture_n whereof_o he_o have_v give_v abundant_a evidence_n by_o his_o scriptural_a catechism_n in_o the_o open_n and_o apply_v whereof_o his_o gift_n be_v excellent_a and_o peculiar_a all_o that_o know_v he_o and_o be_v acquaint_v with_o his_o discourse_n ministry_n or_o pen_n must_v bear_v he_o that_o testimony_n with_o the_o holy_a apostle_n st._n paul_n he_o prefer_v the_o learning_n get_v at_o the_o foot_n of_o christ_n above_o all_o he_o have_v get_v at_o the_o foot_n of_o gamaliel_n and_o though_o he_o have_v the_o valuable_a accomplishment_n of_o other_o learning_n yet_o he_o determine_v not_o to_o know_v any_o thing_n save_o jesus_n christ_n and_o he_o crucify_v in_o which_o knowledge_n he_o be_v like_o saul_n high_a than_o most_o of_o his_o brethren_n from_o the_o shoulder_n and_o upward_o i_o know_v none_o i_o can_v better_o compare_v he_o with_o than_o that_o eminent_a and_o powerful_a servant_n and_o instrument_n of_o jesus_n christ_n mr._n arthur_n hildershaw_n who_o i_o be_o prone_a to_o believe_v he_o propound_v to_o himself_o as_o a_o pattern_n for_o imitation_n but_o knowledge_n alone_o be_v not_o sufficient_a instruction_n for_o a_o minister_n of_o the_o gospel_n it_o be_v no_o rare_a thing_n to_o find_v some_o great_a scholar_n in_o the_o theory_n of_o scripture_n who_o yet_o be_v but_o very_o ordinary_a christian_n who_o light_n like_o that_o of_o the_o moon_n have_v very_o cold_a influence_n he_o be_v best_a accomplish_v who_o know_v head_n effect_n his_o heart_n and_o govern_v his_o life_n who_o know_v reveal_v truth_n as_o well_o by_o spiritual_a sense_n and_o experience_n as_o by_o speculation_n the_o spirit_n of_o
god_n be_v a_o spirit_n of_o truth_n and_o of_o life_n too_o communicate_v both_o grace_n and_o gift_n and_o teach_v as_o well_o 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d as_o 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d both_o which_o consist_v together_o in_o this_o excellent_a person_n the_o word_n of_o god_n dwell_v both_o in_o his_o head_n and_o heart_n and_o be_v effectual_o the_o law_n of_o his_o life_n he_o be_v a_o burn_v as_o well_o as_o shine_v light_n a_o man_n more_o than_o ordinary_o mortify_v to_o the_o pleasure_n of_o the_o flesh_n and_o vanity_n of_o the_o world_n free_o and_o resolve_o devote_v to_o the_o fear_n of_o god_n his_o conversation_n be_v in_o heaven_n his_o communion_n with_o god_n his_o delight_n in_o the_o saint_n his_o business_n religion_n his_o zeal_n for_o holiness_n his_o main_a design_n the_o glorify_v of_o god_n and_o the_o salvation_n of_o his_o own_o and_o other_o soul_n whereof_o the_o follow_a page_n will_v i_o doubt_v not_o be_v a_o abundant_a evidence_n not_o only_o to_o the_o charitable_a but_o rational_a judgement_n of_o the_o christian_a reader_n as_o for_o his_o practice_n of_o mortification_n i_o shall_v not_o otherwise_o express_v it_o than_o in_o his_o own_o word_n as_o i_o read_v it_o in_o the_o record_n of_o the_o remarkable_a passage_n of_o his_o life_n by_o his_o own_o hand_n but_o after_o he_o have_v a_o family_n viz._n have_v be_v foil_v by_o the_o lust_n of_o my_o own_o heart_n several_a time_n and_o consider_v what_o i_o shall_v do_v to_o get_v rid_v of_o those_o lust_n which_o have_v so_o often_o prevail_v over_o i_o god_n direct_v i_o to_o three_o several_a mean_n the_o one_o be_v suggest_v to_o i_o as_o i_o be_v walk_v in_o my_o garden_n and_o meditate_v on_o the_o affair_n of_o my_o soul_n and_o that_o be_v to_o be_v more_o frequent_a in_o eye_v apply_v and_o meditate_v on_o the_o promise_n and_o the_o scripture_n which_o the_o holy_a spirit_n of_o god_n set_v before_o i_o for_o this_o end_n be_v 2_o pet._n 1._o 4._o by_o the_o precious_a promise_n give_v to_o we_o we_o escape_v the_o pollution_n that_o be_v in_o the_o world_n through_o lust_n the_o other_o be_v suggest_v to_o i_o as_o i_o be_v hear_v a_o sermon_n and_o that_o be_v to_o be_v daily_o apply_v the_o lord_n jesus_n to_o my_o soul_n ground_v on_o rom._n 13._o 13._o 14._o where_o the_o apostle_n advise_v to_o put_v on_o the_o lord_n jesus_n christ_n as_o a_o help_n against_o chamber_v and_o wantonness_n strife_n and_o envy_v the_o three_o be_v suggest_v to_o i_o as_o i_o be_v ride_v abroad_o and_o discourse_v of_o the_o thing_n of_o god_n which_o be_v gal._n 5._o 16._o walk_v in_o the_o spirit_n and_o you_o shall_v not_o fulfil_v the_o lust_n of_o the_o flesh_n in_o pursuance_n of_o these_o mean_n for_o the_o mortify_n of_o the_o lust_n of_o the_o flesh_n i_o determine_v with_o myself_o to_o eye_n the_o promise_n of_o god_n more_o frequent_o than_o i_o have_v do_v and_o to_o that_o end_n i_o choose_v out_o some_o promise_n of_o daily_a and_o continual_a use_n and_o determine_v by_o the_o help_n of_o god_n to_o salute_v and_o embrace_v they_o once_o a_o day_n and_o not_o only_o to_o take_v a_o view_n of_o they_o myself_o but_o in_o my_o meditation_n and_o soliloquy_n to_o spread_v they_o before_o god_n and_o to_o put_v the_o lord_n in_o remembrance_n of_o they_o for_o supply_v all_o the_o want_n of_o the_o day_n i_o choose_v that_o promise_n phil._n 4._o 19_o for_o growth_n in_o grace_n hos_n 14._o 5._o for_o subdue_a my_o sin_n mic._n 7._o 19_o rom._n 6._o 14._o for_o success_n in_o my_o undertake_n ps_n 1._o 3._o for_o turn_v all_o the_o event_n of_o the_o day_n for_o good_a to_o i_o rom._n 8._o 28._o for_o the_o conversion_n and_o sanctification_n of_o my_o child_n isa_n 44._o 3._o for_o my_o yoke-fellow_n and_o servant_n and_o all_o other_o in_o my_o family_n that_o they_o may_v get_v good_a from_o i_o and_o return_v to_o god_n and_o grow_v in_o grace_n hos_n 14._o 7._o for_o sanctify_v of_o my_o affliction_n isa_n 27._o 9_o zech._n 13._o 9_o for_o audience_n of_o my_o prayer_n mic._n 7._o 7._o joh._n 14._o 13._o 14._o for_o grace_n and_o strength_n to_o manage_v all_o the_o work_n of_o the_o day_n to_o the_o glory_n of_o god_n zech._n 10._o 12._o for_o protection_n from_o danger_n and_o casualty_n gen._n 15._o 1._o for_o give_v i_o eternal_a life_n in_o case_n the_o day_n shall_v bring_v death_n to_o i_o luk._n 12._o 32._o joh._n 3._o 16._o for_o counsel_n and_o direction_n in_o all_o case_n of_o difficulty_n and_o unexpected_a emergency_n isa_n 58._o 11._o ps_n 32._o 8._o i_o judge_v it_o also_o very_o conducible_a to_o the_o glory_n of_o god_n and_o my_o own_o soul_n good_a to_o manage_v all_o my_o employment_n as_o much_o as_o may_v be_v with_o a_o eye_n to_o the_o promise_n and_o as_o to_o my_o call_n when_o i_o be_o study_v to_o compose_v sermon_n deut._n 28._o 8._o when_o i_o go_v to_o preach_v math._n 28._o 19_o 20._o for_o success_n in_o my_o preach_n isa_n 56._o 8._o 65._o 23._o i_o be_v the_o more_o confirm_v in_o this_o frequent_a and_o familiar_a converse_n with_o the_o promise_n not_o only_o as_o it_o help_v on_o our_o participation_n of_o the_o divine_a nature_n and_o our_o escape_v the_o pollution_n that_o be_v in_o the_o world_n through_o lust_n but_o because_o the_o lord_n command_v we_o to_o be_v always_o mindful_a of_o his_o covenant_n 1_o chron._n 16._o 15._o and_o it_o please_v god_n to_o see_v we_o take_v hold_v of_o his_o covenant_n isa_n 56._o 4._o and_o it_o be_v for_o the_o glory_n of_o god_n 2_o cor._n 1._o 20._o i_o determine_v also_o when_o i_o shall_v feel_v the_o work_n of_o any_o lust_n present_o to_o look_v up_o to_o jesus_n christ_n it_o be_v the_o remedy_n which_o the_o holy_a ghost_n prescribe_v against_o such_o sin_n as_o do_v most_o easy_o beset_v we_o heb._n 12._o 1._o 2._o i_o have_v often_o be_v encourage_v and_o help_v in_o this_o practice_n of_o look_v unto_o jesus_n to_o subdue_v my_o sin_n from_o act._n 3._o ult_n god_n send_v his_o son_n jesus_n to_o bless_v we_o in_o turn_v we_o every_o one_o from_o his_o iniquity_n beza_n note_n upon_o that_o text_n be_v very_o good_a and_o have_v be_v of_o use_n to_o i_o viz._n that_o the_o great_a word_n for_o inquity_n signify_v the_o root_n and_o habit_n of_o sin_n i_o see_v it_o be_v my_o duty_n and_o concernment_n every_o day_n to_o be_v more_o frequent_a in_o apply_v my_o soul_n to_o christ_n and_o christ_n his_o benefit_n to_o my_o soul_n in_o pursuance_n of_o the_o 3d_o mean_n of_o mortification_n viz._n walk_v in_o the_o spirit_n i_o resolve_v to_o endeavour_v to_o do_v my_o work_n and_o duty_n both_o to_o god_n and_o man_n more_o spiritual_o and_o in_o order_n hereunto_o to_o reduce_v my_o act_n to_o some_o word_n and_o as_o oft_o as_o i_o can_v to_o eye_n some_o word_n of_o god_n as_o i_o be_v enter_v on_o they_o as_o for_o instance_n if_o i_o be_v call_v out_o by_o other_o or_o stir_v up_o in_o my_o own_o spirit_n to_o visit_v the_o sick_a or_o any_o afflict_a person_n to_o have_v my_o thought_n on_o math._n 25._o 36._o or_o jam._n 1._o 27._o when_o any_o poor_a people_n come_v to_o i_o for_o relief_n or_o any_o object_n of_o charity_n be_v present_v to_o i_o to_o eye_n gal._n 6._o 10._o or_o hebr._n 13._o 16._o or_o isa_n 58._o 10._o or_o eccl._n 11._o 1._o or_o prov_fw-mi 19_o 17._o when_o a_o poor_a man_n come_v to_o borrow_v deut._n 15._o 7._o 8._o 10._o when_o to_o write_v letter_n take_v a_o journey_n or_o be_v any_o way_n employ_v for_o other_o gal._n 5._o 13._o phil._n 2._o 4._o when_o to_o visit_n out_o of_o courtesy_n or_o do_v any_o thing_n which_o courtesy_n require_v 1_o pet._n 3._o 8._o when_o to_o instruct_v my_o servant_n and_o child_n deut._n 6._o 7._o gen._n 18._o 19_o when_o to_o catechise_v the_o youth_n that_o come_v to_o my_o family_n joh._n 21._o 15._o prov._n 22._o 6._o when_o invite_v to_o exercise_v abroad_o among_o poor_a or_o rich_a isa_n 32._o ult_n when_o to_o administer_v a_o reproof_n leu._n 19_o 17._o when_o to_o confer_v about_o spiritual_a thing_n mal._n 3._o 17._o this_o be_v the_o wise_a and_o holy_a method_n which_o this_o faithful_a servant_n and_o soldier_n of_o jesus_n christ_n prescribe_v to_o himself_o by_o divine_a direction_n whereby_o to_o manage_v the_o spiritual_a war_n with_o the_o sin_n that_o dwell_v in_o he_o that_o he_o may_v not_o be_v overcome_v with_o it_o according_a to_o which_o he_o moreover_o charge_v himself_o with_o the_o practice_n of_o universal_a positive_a holiness_n which_o he_o thus_o record_v be_v under_o the_o rebuke_n of_o god_n chastise_v
my_o spirit_n from_o those_o word_n of_o the_o prophet_n isa_n 40._o 27._o why_o say_v thou_o o_o jacob_n and_o speak_v o_o israel_n my_o way_n be_v hide_v from_o the_o lord_n and_o my_o judgement_n be_v pass_v over_o from_o my_o god_n and_o do_v encourage_v my_o soul_n still_o to_o hope_v in_o god_n and_o wait_v for_o his_o strength_n from_o the_o follow_a word_n v_o 28_o 29._o 31._o have_v thou_o not_o know_v have_v thou_o not_o hear_v if_o thou_o have_v not_o know_v it_o by_o experience_n have_v find_v his_o everlasting_a arm_n under_o thou_o for_o thy_o support_n yet_o have_v thou_o not_o at_o least_o hear_v it_o that_o the_o everlasting_a god_n the_o lord_n the_o creator_n of_o the_o end_n of_o the_o earth_n faint_v not_o neither_o be_v weary_a he_o give_v power_n to_o the_o faint_a etc._n etc._n continue_v thou_o therefore_o o_o my_o soul_n to_o wait_v upon_o the_o lord_n lord_n what_o a_o accurse_a hard_a heart_n have_v i_o that_o sin_n which_o grieve_v thou_o gen._n 6._o 6._o thy_n son_n mar._n 3._o 5._o thy_o spirit_n eph._n 4._o 30._o shall_v not_o grieve_v i_o that_o sin_n which_o weary_v thou_o isa_n 43._o 24._o shall_v not_o be_v a_o burden_n to_o i_o that_o i_o shall_v not_o be_v trouble_v for_o want_v of_o thy_o presence_n when_o as_o the_o hide_v of_o thy_o face_n make_v our_o saviour_n cry_v out_o my_o god_n my_o god_n why_o have_v thou_o forsake_v i_o that_o eternity_n and_o judgement_n to_o come_v shall_v make_v no_o impression_n upon_o i_o that_o i_o can_v hear_v yea_o speak_v of_o thy_o word_n thy_o wrath_n etc._n etc._n and_o yet_o not_o fear_v thou_o not_o tremble_v at_o thy_o word_n nor_o at_o this_o my_o condition_n feb._n 19_o be_v sabbath_n day_n have_v former_o perceive_v a_o desperate_a hardness_n in_o my_o heart_n that_o that_o word_n which_o work_v upon_o other_o shall_v do_v i_o no_o good_a that_o no_o mean_n no_o mercy_n do_v melt_v my_o soul_n and_o almost_o despair_v of_o ever_o have_v it_o soften_v after_o prayer_n i_o be_v encourage_v from_o the_o lord_n in_o read_v mr._n hooker_n upon_o act._n 2._o 37._o who_o from_o those_o word_n when_o they_o hear_v these_o thing_n they_o who_o have_v crucify_a our_o lord_n christ_n be_v prick_v at_o the_o heart_n raise_v this_o observation_n it_o be_v possible_a even_o for_o the_o most_o stubborn_a sinner_n to_o get_v a_o break_a heart_n and_o now_o o_o my_o soul_n why_o be_v thou_o cast_v down_o be_v not_o the_o lord_n great_a than_o thy_o heart_n can_v satan_n be_v more_o malicious_a to_o destroy_v thou_o than_o the_o lord_n be_v merciful_a to_o save_v thou_o yet_o the_o act_n of_o my_o faith_n hereupon_o be_v but_o faint_a upon_o examination_n of_o myself_o i_o have_v sometime_o find_v that_o to_o my_o own_o sense_n and_o feeling_n i_o have_v be_v altogether_o void_a of_o any_o love_n or_o fear_v of_o god_n and_o that_o i_o have_v be_v at_o such_o a_o time_n as_o unable_a to_o work_v up_o my_o heart_n into_o the_o love_n and_o fear_n of_o god_n as_o to_o say_v to_o this_o mountain_n be_v thou_o remove_v and_o cast_v into_o the_o sea_n such_o wonderful_a deadness_n have_v seize_v upon_o my_o soul_n so_o great_o have_v i_o be_v enslave_v and_o hold_v captive_a by_o satan_n that_o i_o have_v not_o be_v able_a true_o to_o desire_v the_o spirit_n of_o god_n o_o that_o my_o heart_n can_v bleed_v at_o the_o remembrance_n of_o this_o great_a evil_n that_o i_o shall_v not_o only_o be_v cut_v off_o from_o communion_n with_o god_n but_o be_v content_v with_o this_o condition_n that_o i_o shall_v have_v no_o groan_n in_o spirit_n to_o be_v deliver_v from_o this_o miserable_a bondage_n be_v instruct_v hence_o o_o my_o soul_n to_o ascribe_v every_o good_a motion_n to_o god_n if_o thou_o feel_v any_o hungring_n after_o jesus_n christ_n or_o any_o sorrow_n for_o want_n of_o god_n presence_n or_o the_o like_a own_o it_o as_o his_o work_n and_o bless_v he_o for_o it_o i_o have_v sometime_o find_v my_o condition_n much_o like_o the_o man_n mention_v joh._n 5._o who_o lay_v a_o long_a time_n by_o the_o pool_n of_o bethesda_n but_o be_v not_o able_a to_o put_v himself_o in_o that_o he_o may_v be_v heal_v even_o so_o it_o be_v with_o my_o soul_n though_o god_n have_v open_v a_o fountain_n for_o sin_n and_o for_o uncleanness_n to_o wash_v in_o and_o i_o find_v my_o soul_n exceed_o pollute_v yet_o i_o be_o not_o able_a to_o step_v into_o this_o fountain_n that_o i_o may_v be_v heal_v o_o my_o soul_n the_o lord_n see_v thy_o weakness_n and_o that_o thou_o have_v be_v now_o a_o long_a time_n in_o this_o case_n wait_v thou_o on_o god_n who_o can_v tell_v but_o that_o as_o the_o bowel_n of_o jesus_n christ_n do_v yearn_v towards_o the_o poor_a man_n so_o may_v his_o compassion_n be_v great_a towards_o thou_o and_o he_o may_v heal_v thou_o also_o cease_v not_o to_o importune_v he_o say_v jesus_n thou_o son_n of_o god_n have_v mercy_n on_o i_o o_o lord_n heal_v my_o soul_n have_v at_o several_a time_n find_v diverse_a work_n upon_o my_o heart_n as_o conviction_n and_o thereupon_o some_o pant_n and_o breathe_n after_o god_n but_o as_o yet_o nothing_o come_v to_o perfection_n i_o think_v of_o and_o find_v that_o i_o have_v cause_n to_o take_v up_o the_o complaint_n of_o hezekiah_n in_o another_o case_n it_o be_v a_o day_n of_o trouble_n and_o rebuke_v the_o child_n be_v come_v to_o the_o birth_n and_o there_o be_v no_o strength_n to_o bring_v forth_o isa_n 37._o 3._o some_o time_n after_o read_v isa_n 66._o it_o seem_v to_o i_o that_o that_o word_n v._n 9_o be_v suit_v to_o my_o case_n shall_v i_o bring_v to_o the_o birth_n and_o not_o cause_n to_o bring_v forth_o say_v the_o lord_n shall_v i_o cause_v to_o bring_v forth_o and_o shut_v the_o womb_n say_v thy_o god_n o_o my_o soul_n wait_v thou_o on_o god_n who_o will_v perfect_v his_o own_o work_n in_o thou_o he_o have_v say_v he_o will_v not_o break_v the_o bruise_a reed_n nor_o quench_v the_o smoke_a flax_n till_o he_o send_v forth_o judgement_n unto_o victory_n i_o have_v ofttimes_o see_v a_o law_n in_o my_o member_n war_a against_o the_o law_n of_o my_o mind_n and_o lead_v i_o into_o captivity_n to_o the_o law_n of_o sin_n and_o death_n so_o powerful_a and_o mighty_a have_v be_v the_o act_n of_o some_o inward_a corruption_n that_o i_o have_v not_o be_v able_a to_o overcome_v they_o but_o have_v be_v hurry_v captive_a by_o they_o hereby_o i_o come_v to_o see_v that_o truth_n the_o heart_n of_o man_n be_v desperate_o wicked_a who_o can_v know_v it_o i_o can_v fathom_v the_o depth_n of_o iniquity_n which_o be_v in_o my_o heart_n hereupon_o i_o be_o make_v to_o cry_v out_o with_o st._n paul_n o_o wretched_a man_n that_o i_o be_o who_o shall_v deliver_v i_o from_o this_o body_n of_o death_n o_o lord_n be_v not_o thou_o far_o from_o i_o but_o make_v haste_n to_o help_v i_o let_v the_o sigh_v of_o the_o prisoner_n come_v before_o thou_o proclaim_v liberty_n to_o thy_o captive_n and_o the_o open_n of_o the_o prison_n door_n to_o he_o that_o be_v bind_v with_o the_o chain_n of_o sin_n isa_n 61._o 1._o mar._n 26._o 1654._o i_o find_v that_o though_o in_o my_o judgement_n and_o profession_n i_o acknowledge_v christ_n to_o be_v my_o righteousness_n and_o peace_n yet_o upon_o examination_n i_o observe_v that_o my_o heart_n have_v do_v quite_o another_o thing_n and_o that_o secret_o i_o have_v go_v about_o to_o establish_v my_o own_o righteousness_n and_o have_v derive_v my_o comfort_n and_o peace_n from_o my_o own_o act_n for_o when_o i_o have_v be_v disquiet_v by_o the_o act_n of_o my_o sin_n that_o which_o have_v recover_v i_o to_o my_o former_a peace_n have_v not_o be_v that_o i_o can_v find_v god_n speak_v peace_n through_o the_o blood_n of_o christ_n but_o rather_o from_o the_o intermission_n of_o temptation_n and_o the_o cessation_n of_o those_o sin_n when_o i_o have_v be_v trouble_v at_o a_o evil_a frame_n of_o heart_n i_o do_v not_o find_v that_o the_o righteousness_n of_o christ_n have_v be_v my_o consolation_n but_o that_o which_o have_v relieve_v i_o as_o far_o as_o i_o can_v find_v be_v that_o afterward_o i_o find_v myself_o in_o a_o better_a temper_n have_v be_v in_o trouble_n and_o perplexity_n i_o have_v read_v the_o scripture_n go_v to_o prayer_n and_o in_o do_v these_o i_o have_v be_v relieve_v yet_o i_o do_v not_o find_v that_o at_o such_o time_n i_o have_v real_a true_a live_a communion_n with_o god_n in_o such_o duty_n or_o that_o the_o spirit_n of_o god_n do_v in_o those_o duty_n reveal_v to_o i_o my_o interest_n in_o christ_n and_o so_o quiet_a my_o conscience_n hence_o i_o come_v to_o see_v
to_o want_v nor_o how_o to_o abound_v apt_a to_o murmur_v and_o repine_v in_o strait_o and_o to_o be_v lift_v up_o and_o grow_v secure_a in_o enlargement_n o_o lord_n in_o every_o condition_n i_o need_v thy_o grace_n to_o teach_v i_o how_o to_o behave_v myself_o o_o show_v i_o thy_o way_n and_o lead_v i_o therein_o for_o thy_o namesake_n also_o the_o lord_n teach_v i_o hence_o that_o i_o ought_v to_o be_v patient_a under_o his_o hand_n when_o he_o hide_v his_o face_n and_o to_o resign_v up_o my_o will_n to_o his_o will_n inasmuch_o as_o i_o do_v not_o know_v what_o be_v good_a for_o myself_o the_o lord_n see_v i_o shall_v be_v worse_o it_o may_v be_v if_o i_o enjoy_v more_o than_o i_o do_v and_o therefore_o in_o wisdom_n and_o mercy_n he_o keep_v i_o in_o a_o low_a condition_n my_o confusion_n sometime_o have_v be_v so_o great_a that_o i_o have_v be_v so_o unsettle_a and_o at_o such_o a_o loss_n in_o my_o soul_n that_o i_o know_v not_o what_o to_o do_v all_o former_a work_n have_v be_v question_v and_o judge_v as_o nothing_o in_o the_o hour_n of_o such_o temptation_n the_o lord_n teach_v i_o beside_o prayer_n and_o search_v into_o my_o soul_n to_o have_v recourse_n to_o former_a experience_n psal_n 77._o 10_o 11._o and_o psal_n 85._o octob._n 11._o in_o the_o morning_n i_o bewail_v it_o before_o god_n that_o i_o be_v still_o at_o a_o loss_n to_o know_v whether_o i_o love_v he_o and_o after_o prayer_n i_o read_v 1_o joh._n 2_o ch_n and_o i_o be_v make_v in_o a_o more_o special_a manner_n to_o take_v notice_n of_o v_o 5._o whoso_o keep_v his_o word_n in_o he_o very_o be_v the_o love_n of_o god_n perfect_v methinks_v i_o see_v god_n answer_v my_o prayer_n and_o tell_v i_o out_o of_o this_o word_n that_o i_o love_v he_o in_o he_o very_o 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d it_o be_v a_o sure_a sign_n of_o love_n to_o god_n we_o need_v not_o doubt_v of_o it_o if_o we_o keep_v his_o word_n now_o if_o i_o know_v my_o own_o heart_n i_o desire_v to_o do_v so_o if_o the_o love_n of_o god_n be_v perfect_v in_o he_o that_o keep_v his_o word_n then_o sure_o it_o be_v begin_v in_o he_o that_o desire_v and_o endeavour_n to_o keep_v his_o word_n jan._n 25._o the_o lord_n help_v i_o with_o tear_n to_o bewall_n my_o abomination_n even_o my_o original_a and_o actual_a sin_n my_o formality_n earthliness_n alienation_n from_o he_o etc._n etc._n therein_o he_o do_v remember_v and_o fulfil_v that_o gracious_a promise_n ezek._n 36._o 31._o i_o find_v godly_a sorrow_n sweet_a not_o only_o in_o the_o root_n and_o fountain_n thereof_o it_o be_v a_o covenant_n blessing_n but_o in_o the_o very_a act_n of_o it_o feb._n 2._o in_o the_o evening_n upon_o my_o bed_n the_o lord_n do_v gracious_o melt_v my_o heart_n in_o the_o sight_n of_o sin_n under_o this_o consideration_n that_o it_o be_v against_o infinite_a love_n i_o be_v ashamed_a confound_v and_o abash_v because_o i_o have_v so_o long_o slight_v neglect_v rebel_v against_o a_o god_n of_o love_n my_o soul_n even_o tremble_v at_o it_o jan._n 15._o 1655._o have_v be_v the_o day_n before_o with_o one_o under_o great_a temptation_n and_o hear_v of_o another_o under_o a_o wound_a spirit_n my_o heart_n be_v melt_v in_o prayer_n whilst_o i_o be_v praise_v god_n for_o his_o long_a patience_n in_o the_o day_n of_o my_o sin_v and_o his_o tenderness_n and_o gentleness_n towards_o i_o in_o my_o conversion_n jan._n 16._o i_o find_v my_o heart_n draw_v out_o to_o a_o recumbence_n on_o jesus_n christ_n the_o spirit_n say_v come_v rev._n 22._o 17._o christ_n say_v come_v joh._n 7._o 37._o and_o the_o father_n say_v come_v mat._n 22._o 4._o and_o who_o be_o i_o o_o lord_n that_o i_o shall_v gainsay_v such_o invitation_n behold_v o_o lord_n i_o come_v and_o put_v my_o trust_n in_o thou_o jan._n 26._o i_o preach_v twice_o and_o have_v very_o gracious_a assistance_n much_o beyond_o expectation_n in_o the_o week_n before_o i_o be_v much_o indispose_v and_o can_v not_o get_v my_o heart_n to_o a_o settle_a meditation_n of_o what_o i_o be_v to_o speak_v i_o be_v under_o a_o great_a sense_n of_o my_o impotency_n and_o labour_v in_o the_o fire_n till_o saturday_n afternoon_n when_o i_o cry_v to_o the_o lord_n he_o be_v gracious_a to_o i_o and_o answer_v i_o after_o my_o work_n be_v over_o i_o be_v much_o assault_v with_o spiritual_a pride_n i_o see_v plain_o the_o reason_n of_o god_n delay_v his_o assistance_n and_o give_v i_o such_o sense_n of_o my_o weakness_n be_v to_o keep_v i_o humble_a every_o way_n o_o lord_n i_o see_v my_o own_o vileness_n when_o thou_o withdrawe_v from_o i_o than_o my_o heart_n die_v and_o my_o strength_n fail_v and_o i_o be_o ready_a to_o be_v froward_a when_o thou_o enlarge_v i_o than_o i_o be_o ready_a to_o be_v puff_v up_o oh_o pardon_n and_o purge_v away_o all_o my_o sin_n for_o thy_o name_n sake_n mar._n 23._o in_o sing_v the_o 15_o the_o psalm_n i_o find_v comfort_n my_o conscience_n bear_v i_o witness_v that_o i_o labour_v after_o those_o thing_n which_o be_v set_v down_o as_o character_n of_o a_o citizen_n of_o the_o new_a jerusalem_n sept._n 28._o i_o have_v sweet_a meditation_n upon_o my_o bed_n i_o find_v god_n in_o my_o morning_n prayer_n also_o in_o private_a and_o assistance_n in_o preach_v but_o not_o such_o a_o influence_n of_o the_o spirit_n in_o public_a prayer_n as_o i_o have_v sometime_o find_v yet_o i_o have_v beg_v of_o god_n that_o he_o will_v give_v i_o his_o presence_n in_o public_a as_o a_o token_n that_o he_o accept_v of_o i_o and_o my_o work_n but_o he_o withdraw_v i_o fear_v hereupon_o that_o i_o have_v tempt_v god_n and_o sin_v in_o beg_v new_a sign_n of_o his_o favour_n when_o i_o have_v have_v such_o great_a experience_n of_o his_o goodness_n many_o time_n before_o lord_n forgive_v the_o sin_n of_o thy_o servant_n nou._n 23._o examine_v myself_o about_o a_o work_n of_o grace_n i_o have_v some_o comfort_n from_o ps_n 40._o 8._o delight_n in_o do_v the_o will_n of_o god_n be_v a_o argument_n of_o the_o law_n write_v in_o the_o heart_n now_o i_o find_v that_o i_o have_v a_o delight_n especial_o in_o some_o duty_n as_o visit_v the_o sick_a comfort_v of_o distress_a conscience_n etc._n etc._n i_o be_v somewhat_o terrify_v from_o that_o word_n in_o job_n ch_n 42._o 7._o i_o be_v afraid_a lest_o in_o my_o preach_v i_o shall_v sometime_o speak_v those_o thing_n of_o god_n that_o be_v not_o right_a and_o soon_o after_o go_v to_o prayer_n i_o be_v in_o time_n of_o prayer_n comfort_v from_o joh._n 16._o 13._o the_o spirit_n shall_v guide_v you_o into_o all_o truth_n dec._n 7._o i_o find_v the_o lord_n very_o much_o answer_v my_o prayer_n in_o give_v very_o gracious_a and_o powerful_a assistance_n both_o in_o prayer_n and_o preach_v at_o trinity_n lecture_n on_o sabbath_n day_n i_o may_v say_v as_o jaber_n 1_o chron._n 4._o 10._o who_o say_v oh_o that_o thou_o will_v bless_v i_o indeed_o and_o be_v with_o i_o and_o god_n grant_v my_o request_n the_o next_o morning_n there_o come_v a_o woman_n to_o i_o and_o say_v she_o be_v trouble_v at_o the_o sermon_n that_o she_o can_v scarce_o sleep_v all_o night_n for_o she_o bid_v not_o go_v so_o far_o as_o the_o scribe_n and_o pharisee_n and_o that_o which_o add_v to_o the_o mercy_n be_v god_n keep_v i_o humble_a after_o this_o enlargement_n mar._n 31._o 1657._o i_o have_v a_o very_a evident_a answer_n of_o prayer_n i_o be_v at_o a_o pinch_n for_o some_o money_n i_o beg_v of_o god_n that_o i_o may_v be_v supply_v and_o that_o afternoon_n one_o to_o who_o i_o have_v lend_v a_o little_a money_n bring_v it_o i_o which_o be_v enough_o for_o my_o present_a necessity_n the_o circumstance_n be_v very_o remarkable_a i_o seek_v the_o lord_n also_o to_o be_v with_o the_o parish_n in_o the_o choice_n of_o their_o churchwarden_n and_o there_o be_v those_o two_o choose_v who_o if_o i_o have_v have_v the_o nomination_n i_o shall_v have_v choose_v myself_o apr._n 21._o i_o keep_v a_o day_n of_o fast_a to_o the_o lord_n i_o find_v god_n gracious_o with_o i_o in_o prayer_n the_o chief_a thing_n that_o i_o propound_v be_v to_o seek_v direction_n as_o to_o my_o preach_v on_o weekday_n among_o other_o thing_n i_o beg_v of_o god_n a_o supply_n of_o my_o want_n be_v in_o some_o strait_n for_o want_n of_o money_n that_o very_a night_n one_o bring_v i_o 10_o s._n for_o preach_v a_o funeral_n sermon_n which_o i_o expect_v not_o and_o the_o next_o morning_n the_o churchwarden_n of_o st._n andrews_n parish_n bring_v i_o 7_o l._n and_o upward_o whereby_o i_o be_v sufficient_o supply_v i_o can_v not_o but_o take_v notice_n of_o
strength_n of_o adversary_n jan._n 1._o 1673._o i_o awake_v about_o four_o of_o the_o clock_n in_o the_o morning_n and_o have_v many_o sweet_a meditation_n in_o my_o bed_n for_o the_o space_n of_o about_o two_o hour_n i_o then_o resolve_v with_o myself_o to_o engage_v my_o heart_n afresh_o and_o to_o renew_v my_o covenant_n with_o the_o lord_n the_o beginning_n of_o this_o new_a year_n to_o be_v the_o lord_n servant_n to_o serve_v the_o lord_n and_o his_o son_n jesus_n christ_n all_o the_o remainder_n of_o the_o day_n i_o have_v to_o live_v in_o this_o world_n in_o such_o service_n as_o he_o shall_v see_v meet_a to_o employ_v i_o the_o encouragement_n and_o inducement_n that_o be_v bring_v to_o my_o mind_n and_o draw_v out_o my_o heart_n willing_o and_o cheerful_o to_o give_v up_o myself_o to_o the_o lord_n to_o serve_v he_o and_o his_o son_n jesus_n christ_n be_v these_o 1._o his_o promise_n of_o afford_v his_o presence_n and_o assistance_n to_o such_o as_o be_v his_o servant_n and_o to_o be_v their_o god_n isa_n 41._o 8_o 9_o 10._o 2._o the_o great_a and_o precious_a promise_n make_v to_o his_o servant_n isa_n 54._o per_fw-la totum_fw-la which_o conclude_v thus_o v._n 17._o this_o be_v the_o heritage_n of_o the_o servant_n of_o the_o lord_n 3._o we_o glorify_v god_n when_o we_o serve_v he_o isa_n 49._o 3._o thou_o be_v my_o servant_n o_o israel_n in_o who_o i_o will_v be_v glorify_v 4._o god_n have_v do_v great_a thing_n for_o i_o both_o for_o my_o outward_a and_o inward_a man_n and_o the_o only_a thing_n that_o he_o require_v of_o i_o be_v to_o serve_v he_o in_o truth_n and_o sincerity_n 1_o sam._n 12._o 24._o 5._o all_o christ_n servant_n shall_v assure_o be_v with_o he_o where_o he_o be_v and_o shall_v be_v honour_v of_o the_o father_n joh._n 12._o 26._o and_o shall_v enter_v into_o the_o joy_n of_o their_o lord_n mat._n 25._o 21._o may_v 19_o 1676._o read_v levit._n 22._o 3._o whosoever_o of_o the_o priest_n in_o their_o generation_n go_v unto_o the_o holy_a thing_n which_o the_o child_n of_o israel_n do_v hallow_v unto_o the_o lord_n have_v his_o uncleanness_n upon_o he_o that_o soul_n shall_v be_v cut_v off_o from_o the_o presence_n of_o the_o lord_n and_o the_o ensue_a sabbath_n be_v sacrament_n day_n i_o consider_v with_o myself_o 1_o st_z that_o great_a reverence_n be_v due_a to_o the_o lord_n supper_n than_o to_o the_o holy_a thing_n under_o the_o law_n 2_o lie_v moral_a uncleanness_n be_v great_a than_o ceremonial_a 3_o lie_n therefore_o i_o consider_v how_o i_o may_v go_v to_o this_o ordinance_n and_o administer_v it_o to_o other_o without_o have_v my_o uncleanness_n upon_o i_o that_o be_v how_o i_o may_v be_v purge_v from_o my_o uncleanness_n to_o that_o end_n i_o determine_v 1._o humble_o to_o acknowledge_v confess_v and_o bewail_v the_o uncleanness_n of_o my_o heart_n lip_n and_o life_n before_o the_o lord_n isa_n 6._o 5_o 6_o 7_o 8_o 9_o when_o the_o prophet_n bemoan_v his_o uncleanness_n the_o lord_n purge_v it_o away_o and_o send_v he_o to_o do_v his_o office_n 2._o to_o go_v to_o the_o fountain_n set_v open_a for_o sin_n and_o for_o uncleanness_n zech._n 13._o 1._o that_o be_v to_o act_v my_o faith_n on_o the_o blood_n of_o christ_n which_o cleanse_v from_o all_o sin_n 1_o joh._n 1._o 7._o 3._o to_o rest_v upon_o god_n by_o faith_n for_o fulfil_v his_o covenant_n wherein_o he_o have_v promise_v to_o cleanse_v i_o from_o all_o my_o filthiness_n and_o to_o save_v i_o from_o all_o my_o uncleanness_n ezek._n 36._o 25_o 29._o act._n 15._o 9_o 4._o to_o plead_v earnest_o with_o god_n to_o take_v away_o all_o iniquity_n hos_fw-la 14._o 2._o and_o to_o create_v in_o i_o a_o clean_a heart_n ps_n 51._o 10._o and_o to_o succeed_v my_o prayer_n with_o endeavour_n to_o put_v away_o evil_a and_o uncleanness_n out_o of_o my_o heart_n and_o life_n isa_n 1._o 16._o 18._o 2_o cor._n 7._o 1._o these_o be_v many_o of_o those_o judicious_a observation_n which_o this_o holy_a person_n make_v and_o those_o spiritual_a experience_n he_o find_v and_o record_v for_o his_o own_o use_n that_o he_o may_v always_o have_v at_o hand_n before_o he_o the_o manner_n and_o method_n of_o god_n deal_v with_o his_o soul_n the_o work_n of_o corruption_n and_o grace_n his_o lapse_n and_o recovery_n his_o combat_n and_o victory_n over_o world_n sin_n and_o satan_n his_o perseverance_n and_o progress_n in_o holiness_n the_o secret_a intercourse_n between_o god_n and_o his_o soul_n the_o withdrawing_n and_o return_v of_o the_o holy_a spirit_n the_o faithfulness_n of_o god_n covenant_n the_o truth_n of_o his_o word_n sensible_o feel_v in_o his_o heart_n food_n for_o his_o faith_n encouragement_n to_o walk_v with_o god_n with_o experimental_a instruction_n how_o to_o comfort_v trouble_v conscience_n in_o which_o part_n of_o the_o ministry_n he_o have_v a_o peculiar_a excellency_n beyond_o most_o part_n of_o his_o brethren_n for_o partly_o by_o his_o diligent_a search_n of_o the_o holy_a scripture_n partly_o by_o observe_v and_o record_v the_o method_n of_o the_o holy_a ghost_n towards_o himself_o and_o partly_o by_o discourse_v with_o trouble_a conscience_n wherein_o as_o he_o be_v much_o exercise_v so_o he_o take_v much_o delight_n he_o be_v so_o acquaint_v with_o the_o various_a case_n of_o conscience_n and_o so_o well_o understand_v both_o case_n and_o cure_v that_o it_o may_v be_v true_o say_v of_o he_o the_o lord_n god_n have_v give_v he_o the_o tongue_n of_o the_o learned_a that_o he_o may_v know_v how_o to_o speak_v a_o word_n in_o season_n to_o the_o weary_a on_o which_o account_n he_o may_v be_v surname_v barnabas_n a_o son_n of_o consolation_n it_o be_v his_o usual_a manner_n in_o preach_v to_o foresee_v and_o raise_v such_o objection_n as_o trouble_a soul_n be_v prone_a to_o make_v against_o themselves_o and_o to_o solve_v they_o with_o much_o clearness_n and_o satisfaction_n and_o many_o application_n of_o such_o soul_n be_v make_v to_o to_o he_o in_o private_a as_o to_o a_o skilful_a experience_a spiritual_a physician_n who_o advice_n god_n succeed_v with_o his_o blessing_n to_o the_o encouragement_n of_o the_o faith_n and_o hope_n of_o many_o doubt_a christian_n that_o walk_v in_o darkness_n which_o be_v here_o publish_v not_o only_o as_o instance_n and_o demonstration_n of_o that_o spirit_n of_o light_n and_o grace_n that_o power_n of_o godliness_n which_o possess_v and_o govern_v his_o heart_n and_o life_n and_o fit_v he_o to_o be_v such_o a_o useful_a instrument_n for_o the_o service_n of_o christ_n and_o his_o church_n on_o which_o account_n his_o memory_n be_v worthy_o honourable_a and_o precious_a to_o all_o good_a man_n but_o especial_o for_o the_o instruction_n direction_n relief_n support_n and_o encouragement_n of_o other_o who_o be_v follow_v he_o though_o at_o a_o great_a distance_n in_o that_o narrow_a way_n which_o lead_v to_o that_o life_n to_o which_o he_o be_v arrive_v they_o who_o labour_n and_o be_v heavy_a lade_v who_o be_v bow_v down_o under_o the_o power_n and_o weight_n of_o their_o sin_n wrestle_v with_o corruption_n and_o temptation_n exercise_v with_o darkness_n and_o doubt_n with_o fear_n and_o faint_n they_o who_o be_v call_v to_o difficult_a service_n which_o require_v much_o labour_n and_o diligence_n and_o self-denial_n and_o may_v expose_v they_o to_o the_o hazard_n and_o danger_n of_o this_o evil_a world_n may_v hence_o take_v counsel_n and_o encouragement_n while_o they_o read_v the_o sense_n and_o work_n of_o their_o own_o heart_n in_o the_o experience_n the_o method_n and_o practicablenesse_n of_o their_o duty_n in_o the_o example_n of_o this_o eminent_a saint_n we_o have_v hitherto_o see_v something_n of_o his_o conscience_n of_o sin_n and_o duty_n his_o industry_n and_o zeal_n for_o the_o service_n and_o glory_n of_o god_n his_o combat_n with_o the_o flesh_n and_o satan_n his_o love_n to_o christ_n and_o his_o church_n his_o spirituality_n in_o religion_n his_o long_n and_o breathe_n after_o god_n his_o remember_a god_n upon_o his_o bed_n and_o meditate_v on_o he_o in_o the_o night_n watch_v his_o wise_a improvement_n of_o the_o holy_a scripture_n his_o due_a fulfil_n of_o all_o relation_n his_o holy_a manner_n of_o live_v to_o god_n from_o whence_o we_o may_v rational_o conclude_v that_o sure_o he_o give_v this_o diligence_n unto_o the_o full_a assurance_n of_o hope_n that_o he_o taste_v the_o consolation_n of_o god_n and_o receive_v the_o earnest_n of_o glory_n that_o he_o walk_v upon_o the_o top_n of_o pisgah_n in_o the_o light_n of_o god_n countenance_n and_o in_o the_o sight_n of_o the_o heavenly_a canaan_n which_o privilege_n indeed_o the_o god_n of_o peace_n and_o comfort_n do_v not_o deny_v he_o he_o be_v a_o man_n as_o of_o much_o grace_n so_o of_o much_o peace_n a_o instance_n of_o that_o