musing on this matchless Saint I cry'd Thou being so wholly dreined from all Pride As one not fit here longer to abide Go to thy Bridegroom go thou true coelestial Bride Eighthly As after Conviction she was Mortify'd to all Pride so she did in a wonderful manner beyond any President I ever saw shine forth in the contrary Grace Humility She had learned of her Saviour to be meek and lowly in heart Mat. 11.29 And so excellent well she learned that none tabernacled in a Body of Flesh could have a more Debasing thought of Self than she had She sate with Job in the Ashes and with Hezekiah counted all her Prayers and the best of her Performances but as the chattering of a Crane or Swallow Isa 38.14 The Vilest of Creatures was her constant Motto That no body was Worse that every body was better than she was the undissembled Thought of her Heart When she was most Lovely in the Eyes of others she was even then most Mean in her own she could not bear to be in the least praised nor endure that any should speak well of her though she was enabled to Sing the Lord's Song on the Borders of Canaan after her return from a long Captivity Indeed in her languishing Condition she was made Humble by God's Providence but when she was Healed she was kept Humble by his blessed Spirit This Saint beholding great Jehovah's Face Her self as low as Hell she did debase Hence 't was she flourish'd so and grew apace She was the humble one replenish'd with all Grace Ninthly After Conviction she was in a Gospel Frame wholly moulded into the Spirit of the Gospel These Two eminent Servants of the Lord Jesus Mr. Robins and Mr. Hammond led her into the Paths of Gospel Light and Truth in which she was extreamly delighted so that the extolled and muâ—h magnified Mountain of Man's Righteousness and Legal Performances became 〈◊〉 a Plain and by their Ministry the Heâ—â—â—â—stone the Lord Jesus Christ was presented to her and she was inabled by the Spirit 's Breathing in her to cry out Grace Grace unto it Zech. 4.7 Hence though Interest and Relation with some other Obligations had intangled her with another sort of Men yet after her Acquaintance with those ' foresaid great Gospel Luminaries they were very little in her Eye for She was convinced not Doing but Believing was the way of the Gospel and that not by any Works of Righteousness she had done or could do but by the Free Grace of God in Christ she was made what she was And therefore the breathing of her Soul was to be found in him not having her own Righteousness which is of the Law but that which is through the Faith of Christ the Righteousness which is of God by Faith That thereby she might know Christ and the Power of his Resurrection and the Fellowship of his Sufferings being made conformable to his death Phil. 3.9.10 Oh! how her very Soul rejoyced in the glad Tidings of the Gospel This glorious Saint admiring Gospel Light Whose most corruscant Beams did shine so Bright Whereby her Darkness was expelled quite The Gospel brought a Day a Day that had no Night Tenthly After Conviction she was inflamed with Love to her dearest Jesus yea with the Spouse she was Sick of Love Cant. 5.8 As she had a Sense of the Forgiveness of Sins as Mary had she verily Loved much as Mary did Luke 7.47 She had a large Share of Gospel Grace as the choice Blessing of Heaven for she loved the Lord Jesus Christ in Sincerity Ephes 6.24 Tho she saw not Jesus with her Bodily Eyes yet she dearly Loved him and that Love has brought her to him so that now She sees Him and is Glorifyed with him Rejoycing with Joy unspeakable and full of Glory for she has now received the end of her Faith even the Salvation of her Soul 1 Pet. 1.8 9. What things were formerly her Gain those she counted Loss for Christ yea doubtless she counted all things but Loss for the excellency of the Knowledge of Christ Jesus her Lord for whom she suffered the Loss of all things and did count them but Dung or Dog's-meat that she might win Christ. 3 Phil. 7.8 Oh Love was the ruling Star in the Firmament of her Soul Though Satan for a while did cast a Mist Over this Saint at length she saw the Christ And seeing lov'd him as her precious Priest Now with his glorious Mouth her precious Soul is Kist. Eleventhly As after Conviction she Loved Christ so she lov'd the Ways of Christ the Ordinances of Christ the Members of Christ the Ministers of Christ and that with a pure Heart fervently If our Saviour's Character of a true Disciple holds good John 13.35 By this shall all men know that ye are my Disciples if ye have Love one to another And if John's Evidence of the new Birth be any thing valid 1 Epist 3.14 We know that we are passed from Death unto Life because we love the Brethren She was as visible a Disciple as real a Regenerate Person and that to the apparent view of all as 't was possible for any Creature to be For I sincerely think never any especially in these last days possest more of the Grace of Love than she did Her very Soul was wrapt up in the Saints Society with them was her greatest yea her only Delight She had David's Spirit and therefore could say with him Psalm 26.8 Lord I have loved the habitation of thy house and the place where thine honour dwelleth I the least and most unworthy of Saints may say of her as David did of Jonathan Her love to me was wonderful passing the love of Women This Saint who Heaven ward so fast did move That She a Saint in every thing might prove As actuated from a Spirit above Most gloriously did shine within the Sphere of Love Twelfthly After her Conviction that she had tasted of the Love of Christ she was extraordinarily Solicitous even with a burning Zeal for the Conversion of Sinners especially of her own carnal Relations Her warm Discourses on this Subject put me in mind of our Lord's Charge to Peter Luke 22.32 When thou art converted strengthen thy Brethren She was wholly of Paul's Spirit when he spoke so affectionately of the Jews Rom. 10.1 Brethren my Hearts desire and prayer to God for Israel is that they might be Saved Her Soul pittied such as were running head-long to Hell her Bowels yearned towards those that had no Sense of their own Condition She could not speak of any of her near Acquaintance in an Unconverted State without Weeping for them as our Saviour did for Jerusalem and with the same Pathetical Wish Oh! that they did truly know in this their day the things that belong unto their peace The Night before She Dyed or rather Translated she express'd her self to a Godly Woman passionately Concern'd for the Soul of her only Surviving Sister with these and more
Knowledge in a dying Hour I was so long in opening those Two Heads that I had no time for Application only address'd my self to the Auditory which was then the most Numerous I ever before or since saw in Havant and I will because I can give you some brief Account of that for I took some Notes of it which are as followeth I shall instead of the several Uses that might be made of this Doctrine I have been discoursing of apply my self in a few Words 1st To Young Ones 2dly To the Relations of this deceased Person 3dly To this Society 4thly To all and every one of this great Congregation 1st To you that are Young You are come this Evening to the Funeral of a young Gentlewoman who was called away by Death in the Flower of her time She was fit to die and therefore she died to live But how is it with you I beseech you consider you may die even now in your youth as well as she Ay! But are you as well prepared for it as she was Oh! Dreadful dying without an Interest in the Lord Jesus Christ You had better never have been Born then die to go to Hell for ever which will most certainly be your Portion if you die in a Christless State Oh that you would take example by this blessed Virgin to Fly youthful Lusts To remember your Creatour in the days of your Youth And now Oh! now in the Morning of your Age to look Heaven-ward I may say of the deceased as Simeon said of the Lord Jesus in his Infant-state Luke 2.24 Behold this Child is set for the fall and rising of many in Israel and for a Sign which shall he spoken against Oh! So verily this young Saint as a glorious Star was shining in this Horizon for the fall and rising of many that is both in Judgment and in Mercy to many in these parts In Judgment to be a greater and more Terrible Condemnation to those Obstinate young ones that will still keep on in their Lusts still continue in their Sins still slight and Contemn the Tenderness of Grace in the Gospel after so great and amazing an instance of the Riches of free Grace the fulness of divine Love extended unto her In Mercy to you who will be affected with what God did abundantly for her in a way of special Grace and therefore will be looking unto Christ as Believing there is the same Free-grace the same rich Love the same bottomless Ocean of Pardoning Healing and Soul-saving Mercy for you as she found as she tasted as she Ravishingly Experienc'd in the day of her Distress Oh! hear this dead Saint speaking to you in David's words Psal 66.16 17. Come and hear all ye that fear God and I will declare what he hath done for my Soul I Cryed unto him with my Mouth and he was Extolled with my Tongue Oh! hear her thus speaking to every Soul of you You young Men and Maids that are yet in the Gall of Bitterness and in the Bond of Iniquity that are minding nothing but the satisfying your Lusts that have no sense of Heaven and Eternity or what will become of your Immortal Souls for ever I was once in the same condition and running on in the same excess of Riot I was once as dead as Carnal as Vain as Frothy as you are But God broke my heart and Melted my Soul with Trembling and Affrightning Shakings under the vvoful Apprehension of a lost Condition and a Flaming Hell that I look'd every Moment to be plung'd into And then he comforted and Reviv'd me with a Sensible Manifestation of redeeming Love then he made knovvn to me the Wonders of Soveraign Grace in fully Revealing and discovering Christ with the avail of his Pretensions Death and Sufferings to my Soul I Cryed to him in the day of Distress and he Graciously Vouchsaf'd his Ear He brought me up out of the Horrible Pit out of the Miry Clay and set my Feet upon a Rock even the Rock of Ages with whom I am now in Glory and shall be so for ever Oh! Therefore you my former Carnal Companions be intreated to seek the Lord whilst he may be found and to call upon him while he is yet near Do not let a Dalilah's Lap deprive you of an Abraham's Bosom Do not for the fading Pleasures of a Transitory Life Subject your precious Souls to eternal Ruin Oh! Let my Case the unexpressible Sorrows I have gone through for Sin and the true pleasures I have found in the ways of Grace and Holiness have a powerful convincing and perswading Effect upon you The good Lord help all you young ones to hear this dead Saint thus speaking to you 2dly My next word is to you that are the Relations of this blessed Person and 't is what our Saviour said to the Mourners about the Damsel we read of Matt. 9.24 The Maid is not dead but Sleepeth So your Daughter your Sister your Relation for vvhom you are in so much Bitterness and because of vvhom your hearts are ready to break vvith sorrovv Oh! She is not dead but Sleepeth Indeed as to you she is dead and you will see her no more with a mortal Eye but unto God she is alive and with him wâ—ll live for evermore Oh! Therefore Assuage your Grief dry up your Tears make no Bevvailing for her for she is better and in a far better State than you Oh! therefore turn your Lamentation for her into Imitation of her think not of her Immature death but of her holy and examplary Life and be ye followers of her who through the abundant increase of Faith and exercise of Patience was fitted for the Kingdom above and is now with the triumphant inheriting the Promises being in Possession of that Inheritance which is Incorruptible Vndefiled which fadeth not away And as to her outward Man she is but fallen asleep and will be awakened again at the joyful Morning of the Resurrection Though she be now with Job saying to Corruption thou art my Father and to the Worm thou art my Mother and my Sister though after her Skin Worms will destroy her Body yet in her Flesh shall she see God I will therefore commend the Apostle's Words to your serious Consideration which I hope may afford you some matter of Consolation at least be a rational Ground for the alleviation of your present Sorrow on this sad Occasion 1 Thes 4.13.14 But I would not have you to be Ignorant Brethren concerning them which are asleep that ye Sorrow not even as others which have no hope for if we believe that Jesus died and rose again even so them also which sleep in Jesus will God bring with him Again v. 16. For the Lord himself shall descend from Heaven with a shout with the Voice of the Archangel and with the Trump of God and the dead in Christ shall rise first On which sweet Conclusion and most comfortable truth I would ground my pressing Exhortation
other Voice but that of Wo Lamentation and bitter Bewailing was day and night to be heard Insomuch that she was an Heart-breaking Grief to her Friends a Burthen to her self and an amazing Spectacle of Astonishment to all that look'd upon her The Lord Pardon the Hardness of my Heart that having these things under review I am no more affected Never did I see such a Mournful Sight never did I hear such a doleful Sound and I think never was there a Creature more exactly like in Sorrow to her Redeemer in the day of his Humiliation when he said of himself My Soul is exceeding Sorrowful and heavy unto Death I had great Thoughts and Akeings of Heart about her what the Issue of these things would be my very Soul travelled in Birth till Christ was formed in her till she was made through the up-lifting of the Spirit to arise and shine as seeing Light to be come and the Glory of the Lord to be risen upon her I pray'd for her I pray'd with her I cry'd day and night to the mighty God of Jacob in her behalf I wept I sigh'd I sobb'd my Heart was ready to break my Soul mourn'd in secret places because the Chariot-wheels of Deliverance drove so heavily on I chose suitable Subjects as I thought for her Condition to Preach upon in publick and did many times apply what I delivered particularly to her She sate just against me in the next Pew to the Pulpit Her Eyes were continually fixed on me but with so ghastly and pittiful a look which had such an Impression on me that I could scarce refrain Tears whenever I cast my Eyes upon her She always repair'd after Evening Sermon to the Repetition Lecture in the middle of the Town carried on by a Godly Zealous Brother of our Church who never failed to pour out his Soul in Prayer to God for her and that in a most affectionate melting manner I was many times as oft as my Weakness would permit there my self and when all was over I used to take her by the Hand and smilingly ask her Come Dear Mrs. Mary how is it with you has God spoken any thing to your Soul to day Have you relish'd and savor'd any thing you have heard Her answer I very well remember was always the same No my Heart is too hard I have not been in the least sensible of any thing you have deliver'd this day you had as good have Preach'd to a Stone as to me And then pulling her Hood over her Eyes to hide her Tears would pensively go away for she could never bear to be long in any Company This Oh! this filled my Heart with unexpressible Sadness that no word how suitable soever would fasten that no Truth how Pertinent soever would take hold on her that one Sabbath came successively after another but she never the better her Soul was not at all refresh'd by any Waters flowing from the Sanctuary I want words to tell you how my wounded Spirit was upon the Rack how my disturbed Mind was in a Flame for this young disconsolate Gentlewoman who was so miserably walking in Darkness that she could see no Light who was so wofully under the Gripings of Satan that she could by no means be perswaded to trust in the Name of the Lord or stay her self upon her God In this deplorable State lying among the Pots she continued many Weeks without any sensible Alteration unless for the worse That she was in a lost undone Condition having an hard unbelieving Heart without any Interest in Christ or like to have any was the Versus intercularis or the Burthen of the Song in her continued uninterrupted dolorous Complaint At last in the midst of some serious Discourse she desired me to keep a day with her to seek the Lord for her to which I willingly consented as very glad of the Motion she desired some other Minister might be also assistant in the Work to which I freely gave way She then ask'd me what Minister would be most acceptable to me I answered I was very indifferent and desired her to please her self and she would not nor could not displease me She propounded Mr. Earl of Gospert who I think was some Relation to her I told her with all my Heart Accordingly we met at a Private House in the Town with several Christian Friends Mr. Earl began with Prayer and I with Preaching from these words Psal 43.5 Why art thou cast down O my Soul And why art thou disquieted within me Hope in God for I shall yet Praise him who is the Health of my Countenance and my God I directed my Discourse wholly to her and spake all as far as God help'd me that I could judge proper for her to hear under the Circumstances she at that time was she sate at the Table just against me fixing her Eyes constantly on me with a doleful and pitty-commanding look But nothing I said as I could by after-discourse perceive made any Impression on her After I concluded with Prayer Mr. Earl then Preach'd his Text was John 14.27 Peace I leave with you my Peace I give unto you not as the World giveth give I unto you She was in appearance a great deal worse after this day than she was before Her Temptations were more rampant her Breakings-out in bitter and dismal Complaints were more violent and her Sorrow great enough before did every way more abundantly increase which made my Soul mourn in secret breathing forth the sad words of the Church O Lord God of Hosts how long wilt thou be angry against the Prayer of thy People Thou feedest this poor Creature with the Bread of Tears and givest her Tears to drink in great measure One night very late I cannot forget it I was sent for in all haste to her when I came I found her in the most dreadful Agonies under the most horrible Consternation of Spirit as 't was possible for any of the Children of Men on this side the Lake of Burning to be possessed with She cry'd she roar'd out in a most terrible manner even beyond an humane Accent as if she had been at the brink of Hell ready to be swallowed up in the bottomless Gulf The Sorows of Death compassed her and the Pains of Hell took hold upon her yea she found Trouble and to the Amazement and Sorrow even to the Astonishment of all that were in the Chamber with her I was at my Wits end what to do to speak any thing I too evidently saw was but in vain and yet I could not I dar'd not be silent She took no notice of any words upon what Topick soever enforced nor in the least minded the Sluces of Consolation how Sweet and Pleasant soever that were opened to her I pray'd and intreated her I begg'd and beseeched her I spoke to her in the most moving and melting Language I was capable to utter and that with Tears in my Eyes with Contrition in my