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and_o scorn_n he_o will_v be_v apt_a to_o do_v good_a office_n and_o affect_v dispatch_v for_o that_o will_v bâ—_n his_o honour_n as_o to_o undertake_v more_o than_o he_o can_v perform_v and_o delude_v those_o that_o reâ—ie_n upon_o he_o will_v prove_v a_o abuse_n upon_o himself_o and_o his_o own_o reputation_n nothing_o shall_v be_v more_o prevalent_a with_o he_o then_o to_o maintain_v his_o master_n in_o the_o love_n of_o his_o people_n for_o that_o king_n that_o be_v belove_v at_o home_n be_v fear_v abroad_o possess_v a_o secure_a estate_n a_o joyful_a heart_n and_o quiet_a sleep_n with_o present_a and_o immortal_a fame_n in_o which_o happy_a effect_n a_o good_a counsellor_n reap_v no_o small_a applause_n and_o felicity_n a_o good_a parliament_n man_n must_o esteem_v himself_o a_o epitome_n of_o the_o three_o estate_n with_o a_o principal_a relation_n of_o duty_n to_o the_o king_n the_o head_n for_o in_o respect_n of_o common_a duty_n all_o the_o member_n of_o a_o parliament_n be_v 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his_o guide_n he_o leave_v all_o favour_n ill_a will_n and_o partiality_n at_o the_o entrance_n and_o consider_v the_o good_a of_o the_o king_n combine_v with_o that_o of_o his_o people_n he_o fear_v nothing_o so_o much_o as_o to_o wound_v his_o conscience_n or_o to_o betray_v the_o truth_n which_o above_o all_o thing_n he_o ought_v to_o reverence_n soul._n popular_a and_o courtly_a applause_n be_v the_o least_o of_o his_o aim_n he_o be_v not_o so_o well_o please_v with_o any_o thing_n as_o to_o see_v right_a end_n propose_v and_o right_a way_n observe_v towards_o they_o which_o so_o they_o prevail_v he_o will_v glad_o sit_v in_o perpetual_a silence_n but_o rather_o than_o matter_n be_v carry_v against_o his_o conscience_n he_o will_v discharge_v it_o with_o whatsoever_o consequence_n his_o affection_n be_v to_o maintain_v all_o thing_n fair_a and_o even_o in_o the_o church_n and_o state_n as_o he_o find_v they_o due_o constitute_v know_v that_o all_o innovation_n be_v dangerous_a 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one_o well_o fame_v more_o than_o of_o a_o hundred_o other_o goodness_n will_v be_v his_o chief_a object_n and_o reputation_n but_o a_o second_o he_o will_v express_v love_n to_o those_o that_o be_v virtuous_a and_o ingenuous_a for_o there_o can_v be_v a_o great_a or_o more_o sudden_a evidence_n of_o virtue_n &_o ingenuity_n in_o himself_o he_o will_v study_v the_o favour_n of_o the_o powerful_a and_o be_v voluntary_a with_o discretion_n as_o good_a a_o counsellor_n to_o they_o as_o they_o ought_v to_o be_v unto_o the_o king_n he_o will_v love_v his_o master_n honour_n as_o much_o as_o his_o own_o profit_n &_o seek_v it_o as_o industrious_o he_o will_v not_o esteem_v that_o the_o king_n service_n be_v a_o dispensation_n with_o he_o from_o god_n but_o will_v so_o court_v it_o on_o earth_n that_o he_o may_v hereafter_o be_v a_o courtier_n in_o heaven_n though_o compliment_n and_o neat_a attire_n be_v a_o badge_n of_o his_o profession_n yet_o will_v he_o avoid_v excess_n in_o either_o and_o his_o purse_n and_o reputation_n will_v thrive_v never_o the_o worse_o he_o will_v judge_v nothing_o to_o become_v he_o so_o ill_o as_o ignorance_n debauch_n and_o ill_a company_n and_o therefore_o will_v study_v to_o avoid_v they_o he_o will_v bear_v a_o open_a countenance_n and_o a_o close_a heart_n he_o will_v be_v just_a of_o his_o word_n and_o slow_a but_o sure_o in_o contract_v his_o friendship_n honest_a dissimulation_n and_o a_o dissemble_a cheerful_a patience_n be_v a_o kind_n of_o virtue_n necessary_a to_o his_o fortune_n and_o course_n it_o will_v be_v a_o misbecome_a discountenance_n unto_o he_o to_o be_v exclude_v by_o his_o defect_n from_o the_o fair_a performance_n of_o his_o companion_n which_o often_o advance_v they_o to_o no_o small_a grace_n and_o savour_n in_o their_o master_n attendance_n wherefore_o if_o he_o come_v not_o to_o court_v as_o he_o ought_v furnish_v with_o perfection_n of_o dance_a horsemanship_n language_n and_o the_o like_a he_o will_v industrious_o bestow_v his_o idle_a and_o early_a hour_n which_o will_v not_o be_v want_v unto_o he_o therein_o good_a part_n may_v assure_v he_o of_o favour_n and_o favour_n of_o fortune_n to_o conclude_v he_o or_o no_o man_n be_v bind_v to_o be_v a_o complete_a gentleman_n a_o gentleman_n both_o by_o descent_n and_o quality_n stand_v ever_o bind_v to_o his_o good_a behaviour_n outward_o in_o a_o fair_a civil_a courteous_a well_o order_v fashion_n and_o inward_o in_o piety_n charity_n justice_n courage_n truth_n temperance_n and_o those_o other_o virtue_n which_o the_o school_n teach_v for_o if_o outward_o he_o be_v incomposed_a in_o his_o carriage_n and_o civil_a respect_n he_o will_v appear_v to_o man_n that_o understand_v good_a fashion_n as_o full_a of_o solecism_n and_o more_o absurd_a than_o the_o arrent_a clown_n before_o a_o petty_a justice_n of_o peace_n and_o therefore_o he_o will_v make_v it_o a_o business_n so_o much_o to_o frequent_a company_n of_o the_o best_a respect_n 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they_o he_o will_v carry_v himself_o noble_o and_o come_v off_o with_o honour_n for_o to_o be_v cast_v behind_o hand_n in_o fame_n or_o fortune_n be_v much_o more_o difficult_a to_o recover_v then_o to_o prevent_v his_o gift_n shall_v be_v according_a to_o reason_n not_o in_o excess_n yet_o incline_v rather_o to_o the_o most_o for_o else_o they_o lose_v their_o good_a acceptance_n but_o be_v excessive_a he_o lose_v his_o thanks_o as_o seem_v to_o give_v what_o he_o esteem_v not_o and_o taint_v his_o judgement_n in_o not_o understand_v proportion_n when_o he_o fall_v to_o game_n let_v he_o not_o think_v it_o only_o a_o idle_a pastime_n for_o to_o a_o good_a observer_n it_o be_v one_o of_o the_o most_o perspicuous_a discoverer_n of_o our_o inward_a disposition_n and_o affection_n he_o will_v mingle_v pleasure_n with_o profit_n but_o will_v make_v recreation_n his_o servant_n not_o his_o master_n honour_n and_o virtue_n shall_v be_v his_o chief_a aim_n nor_o will_v he_o draw_v a_o note_n upon_o himself_o for_o any_o thing_n but_o tend_v thereunto_o he_o will_v by_o his_o courtesy_n make_v continual_a purchase_n of_o affection_n but_o especial_o in_o his_o own_o house_n where_o he_o can_v hardly_o overact_v it_o yet_o towards_o man_n of_o insolent_a demand_n and_o carriage_n it_o be_v but_o unmannerly_a to_o employ_v it_o civility_n be_v a_o important_a piece_n of_o society_n especial_o among_o the_o better_a sort_n and_o like_o other_o quality_n it_o be_v to_o be_v exercise_v with_o great_a discretion_n and_o good_a temper_n high_a and_o brave_a spirit_n unseasoned_a therewith_o will_v like_o cock_n and_o mastiff_n impatient_a of_o the_o fierceness_n of_o one_o another_o eye_n uncollected_a and_o unrecal_v assault_v each_o other_o with_o blow_n instead_o of_o salute_v there_o have_v be_v divers_a book_n write_v of_o the_o institution_n of_o a_o prince_n of_o a_o courtier_n of_o several_a
be_v all_o in_o all_o for_o the_o best_a of_o we_o be_v subject_a to_o be_v carry_v away_o both_o against_o what_o we_o know_v and_o what_o we_o will_v such_o a_o blindness_n steal_v we_o from_o ourselves_o this_o discourse_n which_o i_o have_v these_o many_o year_n at_o time_n be_v incline_v unto_o and_o have_v forbear_v in_o respect_n of_o the_o little_a credit_n or_o use_v which_o it_o may_v bear_v and_o the_o confuse_a nature_n of_o it_o ill_o befit_v my_o health_n and_o condition_n wrap_v myself_o in_o a_o honest_a conscience_n to_o myself_o and_o have_v long_o since_o put_v off_o the_o world_n and_o worldly_a censure_n yet_o have_v i_o at_o last_o thus_o tumultuary_o adventure_v upon_o it_o have_v not_o cost_v i_o much_o above_o two_o hour_n in_o one_o afternoon_n wherein_o though_o i_o can_v vindicate_v myself_o for_o alas_o who_o can_v against_o error_n so_o seem_v easy_a to_o have_v be_v avoid_v yet_o i_o can_v be_v content_a that_o such_o of_o i_o as_o love_v i_o and_o truth_n shall_v find_v i_o here_o such_o as_o i_o have_v be_v and_o not_o such_o as_o i_o may_v be_v traduce_v june_n the_o first_o 1637._o i_o must_v not_o forget_v to_o thank_v god_n that_o my_o fortune_n be_v not_o utter_o ruin_v consider_v how_o all_o help_n and_o hope_n have_v fail_v i_o in_o my_o cure_n and_o otherwise_o how_o costly_a diversion_n have_v be_v unto_o i_o whereby_o to_o support_v myself_o and_o how_o unfit_a i_o have_v be_v in_o the_o mean_a time_n to_o look_v to_o my_o estate_n debauch_n and_o gluttony_n have_v spoil_v many_o a_o body_n and_o fortune_n scrupulous_a abstinence_n and_o care_n i_o though_o i_o acknowledge_v my_o fortune_n and_o estate_n leave_v i_o be_v such_o as_o by_o this_o time_n i_o can_v in_o likelihood_n have_v so_o improve_v as_o that_o my_o quality_n shall_v not_o require_v a_o better_a yet_o this_o give_v i_o leave_v to_o make_v appear_v that_o be_v engage_v to_o marriage_n before_o eighteen_o year_n of_o age_n i_o have_v my_o quality_n leave_v unto_o i_o with_o a_o estate_n of_o revenue_n not_o above_o six_o hundred_o pound_n per_fw-la annum_fw-la de_fw-la claro_fw-la little_a improvement_n to_o be_v make_v of_o a_o long_a time_n by_o reason_n of_o long_a lease_n and_o jointure_n park_n and_o house_n i_o have_v to_o betray_v i_o and_o i_o be_v leave_v so_o bare_o as_o my_o predecessor_n die_v at_o michaelmas_n i_o have_v nothing_o to_o sustain_v i_o till_o the_o next_o rend_v day_n this_o will_v trouble_v a_o tender_a spirit_n to_o know_v which_o way_n to_o turn_v especial_o with_o other_o cross_a circumstance_n in_o fortune_n i_o must_v insert_v one_o vow_n make_v by_o i_o which_o cost_v i_o a_o great_a part_n of_o my_o estate_n have_v against_o my_o intention_n entangle_v my_o conscience_n thereby_o upon_o a_o unhappy_a accident_n of_o the_o great_a house_n at_o turn_v into_o my_o hand_n at_o such_o time_n when_o i_o be_v thorough_o resolve_v for_o thrift_n in_o a_o most_o private_a course_n a_o quite_o other_o 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its_o root_n from_o myself_o but_o rather_o from_o fatal_a mis-accident_n and_o predecessor_n undue_a consideration_n the_o good_a god_n be_v please_v to_o bless_v my_o son_n and_o make_v he_o as_o happy_a as_o i_o have_v be_v unhappy_a for_o my_o whole_a life_n since_o i_o have_v be_v a_o man_n have_v be_v but_o a_o conflict_n with_o the_o worst_a of_o disease_n and_o a_o wearisome_a seek_v for_o contentment_n plunge_v in_o a_o inextricable_a gulf_n of_o all_o misery_n another_o man_n possible_o will_v not_o have_v come_v off_o so_o well_o in_o fortune_n body_n or_o mind_n good_a god_n how_o vain_a and_o miserable_a a_o thing_n be_v man_n without_o thy_o good_a spirit_n to_o direct_v he_o by_o nature_n corrupt_v by_o art_n sophisticate_a and_o confound_v how_o lose_v in_o the_o ignorance_n and_o inexperience_n of_o youth_n how_o short_a of_o the_o tranquillity_n of_o other_o creature_n how_o often_o ruin_v by_o accident_n by_o mistake_a course_n i_o by_o that_o which_o man_n call_v good_a nature_n yet_o happy_a in_o worldly_a account_n be_v they_o who_o nature_n lead_v they_o not_o only_o to_o affect_v thrift_n which_o many_o by_o reason_n of_o other_o not_o bad_a affection_n imperfect_o do_v but_o to_o make_v it_o their_o pleasure_n their_o felicity_n which_o humour_n thorough_o possess_v they_o please_v profit_v and_o advance_v they_o in_o fortune_n and_o reputation_n whilst_o other_o breed_v to_o more_o ingenuous_a and_o fair_a appear_a way_n and_o study_n unthrifty_o miscarry_v how_o ill_o &_o unadvised_o do_v parent_n provide_v for_o their_o young_a heir_n give_v they_o tutor_n for_o learning_n and_o art_n neglect_v their_o instruction_n in_o true_a virtue_n and_o use_v of_o the_o world_n and_o their_o fortune_n how_o lamentable_a it_o be_v to_o see_v many_o who_o if_o leave_v to_o themselves_o will_v do_v well_o enough_o in_o the_o world_n overswaied_n by_o other_o and_o so_o turn_v out_o of_o their_o way_n as_o that_o they_o can_v recover_v themselves_o but_o alas_o why_o suppose_v i_o it_o will_v go_v well_o with_o we_o if_o leave_v to_o ourselves_o who_o know_v nothing_o more_o assure_o than_o this_o that_o all_o humane_a wit_n and_o resolution_n be_v vain_a without_o the_o powerful_a grace_n of_o god_n to_o assist_v we_o that_o i_o implore_v that_o alone_o be_v my_o comfort_n and_o support_v that_o sweeten_v all_o the_o bitterness_n of_o fortune_n unto_o i_o and_o but_o for_o that_o i_o will_v a_o thousand_o time_n as_o resolute_o and_o constant_o have_v leave_v this_o life_n as_o other_o fond_o and_o dote_o embrace_v it_o christian_a religion_n have_v need_n be_v maintain_v in_o our_o heart_n by_o a_o strong_a hand_n from_o above_o see_v it_o abridge_v we_o not_o only_o of_o our_o general_a liberty_n of_o this_o world_n delight_n but_o even_o of_o the_o freedom_n of_o leave_v the_o world_n when_o it_o afford_v no_o delight_n unto_o we_o june_n the_o seven_o 1637._o many_o thing_n concur_v to_o make_v i_o melancholy_n as_o a_o complexion_n sanguine_a incline_v to_o delight_n and_o pleasure_n yet_o withal_o a_o natural_a scrupulosity_n of_o election_n sensible_a of_o fair_a reputation_n and_o thrift_n affect_v with_o knowledge_n and_o at_o length_n a_o conscientious_a tenderness_n of_o faith_n and_o religion_n work_v i_o the_o great_a happiness_n but_o not_o without_o great_a perplexity_n i_o be_v young_a enter_v at_o court_n and_o by_o accident_n quick_o disheartened_a for_o that_o course_n the_o use_n of_o my_o fortune_n in_o the_o country_n be_v by_o want_n of_o mean_n to_o keep_v a_o comely_a house_n and_o other_o many_o cross_a respect_n not_o free_a unto_o i_o and_o though_o afterward_o i_o be_v draw_v to_o housekeep_v against_o my_o will_n and_o discourse_n yet_o both_o in_o my_o estate_n and_o disease_n by_o the_o care_n &_o retiredness_n incident_a thereunto_o especial_o in_o a_o short_a fortune_n it_o prove_v most_o pernicious_a unto_o i_o my_o disease_n likewise_o be_v much_o if_o not_o original_o occasion_v in_o my_o body_n by_o a_o overusing_a of_o new_a treacle_n against_o a_o danger_n of_o the_o plague_n which_o i_o fall_v into_o by_o mr._n sanders_n his_o death_n thereof_o near_o to_o i_o in_o his_o travel_n with_o i_o at_o his_o return_n from_o london_n the_o first_o of_o king_n james._n as_o also_o by_o a_o overspare_n and_o evil_a diet_n who_o for_o long_o together_o feed_v on_o little_a meat_n of_o good_a nourishment_n but_o only_o fat_a dredging_n skin_n and_o such_o like_a and_o in_o truth_n scarce_o ever_o man_n of_o my_o strong_a constitution_n and_o health_n give_v less_o way_n to_o himself_o in_o please_v his_o appetite_n this_o and_o much_o more_o wrought_v a_o alteration_n upon_o my_o mind_n and_o make_v i_o seek_v a_o supply_n of_o former_a pleasure_n by_o entertain_v myself_o with_o study_n and_o
at_o thy_o good_a pleasure_n set_v a_o period_n to_o that_o life_n which_o i_o only_o hold_v in_o expectation_n of_o a_o happy_a discharge_n and_o dissolution_n by_o thou_o amen_o amen_n november_n 5._o 1637._o a_o physician_n once_o tell_v i_o upon_o repair_n to_o he_o for_o my_o disease_n that_o i_o be_v to_o resort_v to_o god_n call_v upon_o he_o for_o his_o grace_n and_o guide_v myself_o by_o he_o or_o to_o like_a effect_n i_o think_v it_o then_o strange_a and_o improper_a in_o his_o profession_n but_o i_o have_v find_v it_o speak_v like_o my_o good_a angel_n for_o there_o be_v no_o such_o anchor_n nor_o such_o receipt_n to_o a_o trouble_a to_o a_o agitate_a soul_n the_o melancholy_a humour_n once_o predominant_a in_o despite_n of_o judgement_n and_o resolution_n will_v obtrude_v importunate_a thought_n and_o fancy_n take_v occasion_n from_o almost_o every_o object_n to_o make_v a_o troublesome_a and_o discourse_a impression_n make_v thing_n otherwise_o of_o easy_a resolution_n anxious_a and_o vex_v represent_v difficulty_n as_o fast_o as_o design_n whereunto_o free_a spirit_n be_v not_o in_o the_o least_o sort_n obnoxious_a they_o be_v in_o a_o clear_a light_n and_o alacrity_n delight_v in_o themselves_o entertain_v and_o divert_v with_o ordinary_a conversation_n business_n and_o pastime_n while_o the_o other_o droop_v and_o howsoever_o often_o natural_o quick_a will_v play_v upon_o the_o wing_n the_o melancholy_a clog_n check_n and_o pull_v they_o to_o the_o ground_n god_n alone_o be_v the_o hercules_n that_o can_v purge_v that_o augean_a stable_n the_o aesculapius_n who_o can_v give_v relief_n ordinary_a physic_n be_v but_o a_o palliation_n nay_o often_o a_o aggravation_n of_o the_o disease_n the_o powder_n call_v kellowayes_n powder_n with_o god_n blessing_n be_v to_o be_v prize_v for_o it_o go_v to_o the_o root_n it_o work_v at_o length_n and_o so_o as_o the_o patient_n may_v sleep_v play_v go_v on_o in_o a_o ordinary_a diet_n and_o course_n a_o common_a and_o long_a course_n which_o urge_v keep_v in_o weaken_v and_o make_v tender_a be_v mischievous_a and_o incompatible_a if_o such_o powder_n breed_v inconvenience_n epsam_fw-la religion_n water_n though_o but_o a_o draught_n in_o a_o day_n at_o morning_n wonderful_o allay_v and_o rectify_v as_o also_o the_o use_n of_o new_a and_o good_a cider_n these_o with_o god_n grace_n constant_a exercise_n and_o a_o moderation_n of_o the_o mind_n be_v incomparable_a probatum_fw-la god_n have_v give_v i_o so_o strong_a a_o body_n and_o mind_n to_o bear_v the_o injury_n i_o have_v receive_v from_o myself_o accident_n and_o course_n of_o physic_n that_o i_o admire_v may_v it_o please_v he_o to_o make_v my_o life_n and_o death_n to_o his_o glory_n november_n 6._o 1637._o good_a god_n of_o thy_o great_a goodness_n continue_v thy_o mercy_n upon_o i_o and_o as_o i_o have_v hitherto_o prove_v the_o truth_n of_o all_o worldly_a thing_n to_o be_v nothing_o but_o vanity_n and_o vexation_n of_o spirit_n so_o be_v thou_o to_o i_o joy_n and_o comfort_n it_o be_v true_a that_o my_o nature_n education_n course_n of_o life_n and_o disease_n require_v society_n and_o diversion_n the_o consideration_n of_o my_o past_a and_o present_a fortune_n be_v full_a of_o sadness_n but_o thou_o can_v raise_v light_a out_o of_o darkness_n and_o joy_n from_o sorrow_n thy_o good_a spirit_n be_v the_o spirit_n of_o comfort_n and_o without_o thou_o there_o be_v true_o none_o thou_o have_v bless_v i_o so_o far_o as_o to_o have_v allay_v satisfy_v and_o expel_v all_o my_o worldly_a fancy_n i_o have_v fit_v my_o house_n and_o fortune_n to_o my_o son_n in_o as_o much_o as_o i_o affect_v and_o be_v capable_a bless_v it_o unto_o he_o and_o by_o thy_o grace_n exempt_v he_o from_o these_o unquietness_n which_o i_o have_v find_v there_o be_v no_o perfect_a no_o solid_a happiness_n in_o this_o world_n teach_v he_o to_o bear_v such_o inconvenience_n as_o may_v be_v better_o bear_v than_o seek_v with_o a_o unquiet_a unsettle_n to_o be_v avoid_v it_o have_v be_v to_o i_o a_o great_a disease_n to_o over-humour_n myself_o therein_o there_o will_v in_o all_o condition_n be_v something_o amiss_o a_o mind_n curious_a and_o impatient_a be_v a_o great_a mischief_n thus_o appear_v that_o which_o have_v be_v observe_v that_o man_n seldom_o or_o never_o betake_v themselves_o to_o good_a and_o right_a course_n till_o such_o time_n as_o a_o press_a necessity_n i_o may_v rather_o say_v god_n compel_v and_o enforce_v they_o necessity_n i_o have_v ever_o say_v be_v the_o sure_a reformer_n then_o and_o not_o till_o then_o and_o often_o after_o smart_n we_o contract_v ourselves_o and_o contain_v and_o refrain_v our_o extravagancy_n presumption_n dissolution_n and_o luxuriant_a fancy_n november_n 6._o 1637._o a_o search_v spirit_n fall_v among_o the_o crudity_n and_o cavil_v of_o this_o world_n sophistry_n and_o imperfection_n be_v a_o great_a oppressor_n it_o be_v well_o if_o contention_n lay_v only_o as_o some_o affirm_v in_o the_o brink_n and_o not_o in_o the_o depth_n of_o science_n search_n show_v it_o far_o otherwise_o it_o be_v a_o happy_a spirit_n that_o can_v pass_v light_o over_o the_o thing_n of_o this_o world_n and_o even_o in_o matter_n and_o mystery_n of_o faith_n curiosity_n be_v neither_o safe_a nor_o allowable_a i_o be_o something_o of_o the_o nature_n of_o those_o dog_n which_o come_v into_o a_o strange_a place_n rest_v not_o till_o they_o have_v ferit_v every_o corner_n it_o be_v likewise_o a_o natural_a importunity_n with_o i_o in_o any_o thing_n that_o concern_v i_o in_o mind_n body_n or_o fortune_n not_o to_o take_v full_a rest_n till_o such_o time_n as_o to_o my_o capacity_n i_o have_v run_v over_o all_o that_o seem_v to_o belong_v to_o such_o resolution_n willing_o i_o sit_v not_o down_o short_a of_o other_o man_n i_o mean_v in_o honesty_n decency_n and_o knowledge_n much_o less_o short_a of_o myself_o world_n yet_o if_o we_o serious_o and_o curious_o mind_v these_o earthly_a thing_n they_o be_v full_a of_o scruple_n and_o vexation_n if_o we_o slight_v they_o a_o deliberate_v nature_n want_v much_o of_o satisfaction_n and_o contentment_n and_o do_v as_o it_o be_v brutifie_v and_o sin_n against_o itself_o yet_o so_o shall_v it_o as_o well_o minus_n dolere_fw-la as_o gaudere_fw-la it_o be_v that_o which_o i_o have_v long_o since_o find_v and_o affirm_v that_o if_o we_o set_v our_o heart_n on_o these_o worldly_a matter_n they_o prove_v foolishness_n and_o perturbation_n if_o we_o be_v cold_a and_o dull_a in_o they_o all_o thing_n be_v alike_o but_o it_o be_v the_o misery_n of_o a_o hot_a complexion_n that_o it_o require_v entertainment_n hot_a full_a and_o stir_v etc._n etc._n where_o grace_n once_o infuse_v itself_o all_o earthly_a trouble_n be_v evacuate_v that_o alone_o be_v friend_n pleasure_n and_o advantage_n enough_o it_o be_v all-sufficient_a all_o consolation_n perfect_a then_o good_a god_n the_o inestimable_a gift_n of_o faith_n which_o thou_o have_v give_v i_o it_o be_v true_o thy_o gift_n flesh_n and_o blood_n can_v afford_v nor_o relish_v it_o thy_o way_n to_o it_o be_v wonderful_a often_o sharp_a but_o most_o sweet_a in_o the_o conclusion_n i_o kiss_v thy_o rod_n i_o rejoice_v in_o my_o affliction_n and_o feel_v that_o i_o have_v perish_v if_o i_o have_v not_o perish_v thou_o who_o have_v rebuke_v the_o wind_n and_o they_o have_v obey_v thou_o rectify_v my_o spirit_n and_o calm_v all_o suggestion_n all_o storm_n within_o i_o then_o may_v melancholy_a be_v infectious_a but_o not_o mortal_a then_o shall_v i_o live_v and_o die_v to_o thou_o and_o thy_o glory_n which_o be_v all_o my_o ambition_n all_o my_o prayer_n november_n 7._o 1637._o i_o have_v not_o find_v any_o thing_n more_o strange_a nor_o be_v more_o abuse_v in_o any_o thing_n than_o that_o constitution_n of_o soul_n which_o be_v frequent_a and_o more_o or_o less_o incident_a to_o we_o all_o so_o mix_v so_o heterogene_a so_o pregnant_a and_o right_a of_o understanding_n in_o some_o thing_n and_o so_o dull_a and_o wrong_v in_o other_o such_o common_o be_v they_o which_o most_o disturb_v the_o world_n as_o dissonant_n from_o weakness_n as_o true_a strength_n of_o judgement_n exhibit_v according_a to_o the_o say_v such_o production_n as_o a_o fool_n can_v not_o and_o perfection_n will_v not_o so_o appear_v docile_a and_o capable_a of_o reason_n and_o improvement_n and_o yet_o in_o effect_n so_o insensate_a incorrigible_a and_o unalterable_a as_o it_o be_v hard_o to_o conceive_v how_o such_o incongruity_n and_o inconsequence_n shall_v consist_v in_o the_o same_o subject_n or_o in_o truth_n how_o they_o can_v quadrate_n with_o a_o soul_n rational_a and_o instructible_a but_o there_o be_v assign_v to_o we_o all_o a_o natural_a stature_n in_o all_o thing_n which_o no_o art_n food_n or_o industry_n can_v enable_v we_o to_o exceed_v the_o order_n of_o
and_o felicity_n and_o nothing_o but_o the_o perfect_a joy_n of_o heaven_n can_v satisfy_v the_o perfection_n and_o summum_fw-la bonum_fw-la affect_v soul_n when_o we_o have_v say_v and_o do_v what_o we_o can_v we_o be_v in_o such_o a_o mist_n and_o confusion_n of_o thing_n so_o short_a sight_v through_o our_o false_a perspective_n that_o there_o be_v much_o chance_n in_o discern_v the_o truth_n and_o right_a way_n even_o of_o thing_n within_o our_o reach_n and_o capacity_n in_o despite_n of_o all_o our_o search_n and_o circumspection_n god_n be_v all_o in_o all_o without_o he_o see_v we_o shall_v not_o see_v and_o understanding_n we_o shall_v not_o understand_v who_o refer_v to_o nature_n and_o our_o natural_a universality_n of_o faculty_n and_o not_o to_o his_o extraordinary_a influence_n be_v blind_a to_o his_o grace_n and_o operation_n by_o he_o we_o live_v move_v and_o have_v our_o be_v and_o no_o thing_n or_o faculty_n work_n but_o through_o his_o grace_n and_o providence_n fantasy_n in_o we_o be_v like_o the_o sail_n of_o a_o ship_n without_o it_o we_o want_v much_o of_o ornament_n and_o motion_n with_o a_o predominancy_n of_o it_o we_o be_v in_o danger_n of_o over-setting_a without_o it_o many_o thing_n otherwise_o delightful_a be_v dull_a and_o insipid_a and_o if_o it_o be_v over_o pregnant_a it_o ordinary_o ruin_n and_o befool_v we_o it_o be_v our_o soul_n perspective_n multiply_v object_n at_o one_o end_n and_o lessen_v they_o at_o the_o other_o it_o be_v a_o better_a servant_n than_o master_n happy_a they_o who_o steer_v and_o ballast_n can_v rule_v and_o command_v it_o it_o be_v a_o horse_n that_o must_v be_v bear_v with_o a_o hard_a hand_n if_o it_o get_v head_n it_o transport_v we_o to_o much_o inconvenience_n and_o hardly_o contain_v itself_o within_o any_o limit_n of_o judgement_n and_o reason_n all_o thing_n take_v their_o tincture_n from_o it_o it_o be_v to_o be_v less_o than_o man_n to_o want_v it_o and_o more_o to_o bridle_v and_o over-rule_v it_o god_n alone_o can_v temper_v and_o moderate_v our_o inordinate_a fancy_n they_o and_o affection_n he_o alone_o be_v commensurable_a to_o our_o vast_a desire_n moderation_n have_v ever_o be_v a_o hard_a virtue_n the_o most_o conscientious_a spirit_n have_v ever_o be_v subject_n to_o superstition_n and_o idolatry_n strength_n of_o fantasy_n be_v apt_a to_o multiply_v itself_o beyond_o measure_n irreligious_a heart_n cut_v the_o gordian_a knot_n which_o they_o can_v untie_v to_o distinguish_v betwixt_o god_n and_o man_n must_v be_v from_o god_n and_o not_o from_o man_n man_n may_v endeavour_v and_o concur_v but_o god_n alone_o can_v clear_v and_o confirm_v my_o good_a god_n i_o will_v with_o thy_o good_a grace_n let_v my_o heart_n loose_v to_o no_o other_o object_n than_o thyself_o and_o what_o be_v please_v unto_o thou_o so_o shall_v i_o have_v fullness_n of_o joy_n nor_o shall_v i_o regret_n or_o envy_v the_o most_o splendid_a employment_n or_o fantastical_a delight_n where_o with_o this_o world_n siren-like_a enchant_v the_o mind_n of_o such_o as_o dote_v upon_o it_o smile_v thou_o upon_o i_o and_o let_v the_o world_n frown_n or_o scorn_n the_o world_n kiss_n be_v poison_n the_o embrace_n confusion_n they_o carry_v their_o sting_n with_o they_o but_o thy_o favour_n be_v present_a and_o eternal_a felicity_n if_o the_o very_a enjoy_n of_o our_o fancy_n and_o feed_v they_o be_v a_o kind_n of_o surfeit_n and_o oppression_n what_o be_v it_o to_o fail_v be_v cross_v and_o miscarry_v in_o they_o little_a sail_n and_o little_a fancy_n make_v the_o best_a and_o safe_a voyage_n to_o conclude_v these_o shred_n and_o ejaculation_n which_o may_v weary_v but_o never_o satisfy_v either_o myself_o or_o any_o other_o for_o there_o be_v evermore_o and_o better_a to_o be_v say_v our_o artificial_a infirm_a and_o perplex_a condition_n be_v to_o a_o curious_a strong_a mind_n a_o natural_a and_o strong_a distraction_n a_o large_a and_o various_a prospect_n work_v upon_o and_o divide_v the_o fancy_n and_o with_o a_o divulsion_n breed_v a_o kind_n of_o convulsion_n in_o the_o spirit_n and_o a_o solution_n of_o that_o sweet_a continuity_n and_o harmony_n which_o god_n have_v ordain_v natural_a unto_o we_o original_a and_o actual_a sin_n inhabit_v in_o we_o deserve_v that_o and_o much_o other_o punishment_n if_o god_n of_o his_o great_a grace_n and_o indulgence_n give_v we_o not_o a_o clew_n of_o his_o thread_n to_o guide_v we_o we_o be_v confound_v and_o lose_v in_o this_o world_n labyrinth_n he_o be_v we_o and_o the_o world_n prop_n and_o if_o it_o have_v not_o please_v he_o wonderful_o to_o assist_v and_o support_v i_o with_o extraordinary_a strength_n of_o resolution_n and_o his_o good_a spirit_n i_o have_v a_o thousand_o time_n perish_v in_o my_o error_n and_o confusion_n wild_a affection_n which_o lead_v grave_a reason_n by_o the_o nose_n have_v undo_v i_o a_o vertiginous_a spirit_n and_o my_o own_o weight_n and_o strength_n have_v oppress_v i_o and_o well_o may_v i_o miscarry_v see_v the_o strong_a spirit_n be_v in_o the_o multiformity_n of_o their_o discourse_n most_o obnoxious_a to_o find_v reason_n to_o fortify_v themselves_o in_o the_o gross_a obliquity_n to_o we_o in_o propriety_n be_v all_o sensuality_n vanity_n foolish_a presumption_n sophistication_n and_o corruption_n of_o truth_n with_o innumerable_a exorbitancy_n and_o folly_n but_o to_o god_n only_o good_a only_o wise_a just_a merciful_a and_o omnipotent_a be_v ascribe_v all_o honour_n and_o glory_n for_o evermore_o amen_o amen_n good_a god_n i_o be_o the_o work_n of_o thy_o hand_n and_o now_o happy_o of_o thy_o good_a spirit_n let_v thy_o mercy_n work_v with_o i_o and_o upon_o i_o to_o the_o end_n and_o eternity_n tot_o contra_fw-la unum_fw-la caput_fw-la conspirantibus_fw-la quis_fw-la potuissetresistere_fw-la nisi_fw-la dei_fw-la optimi_fw-la maximi_fw-la speciali_fw-la gratia_fw-la aspirante_fw-la there_o have_v need_n in_o truth_n be_v a_o extraordinary_a supply_n and_o support_v of_o reason_n and_o grace_n against_o the_o strange_a and_o strong_a fond_a impression_n of_o the_o melancholy_a humour_n november_n 25._o 1637._o it_o be_v say_v that_o if_o a_o horse_n can_v be_v equal_o place_v to_o provender_n on_o each_o side_n of_o he_o he_o will_v soon_o starve_v then_o resolve_v i_o be_v ambiguous_o constitute_v balance_v in_o disposition_n betwixt_o contemplation_n and_o action_n thrift_n and_o comeliness_n pleasure_n of_o the_o body_n and_o mind_n vice_n and_o virtue_n country_n town_n and_o court_n private_a or_o public_a course_n of_o life_n and_o no_o wonder_n if_o dubia_fw-la torquent_fw-la the_o world_n be_v a_o riddle_n a_o entangle_a skaine_n vexatious_a to_o extricate_v to_o intend_v our_o mind_n and_o affection_n much_o upon_o it_o be_v as_o well_o misery_n as_o vanity_n it_o pay_v we_o with_o a_o cloud_n in_o stead_n of_o juno_n torment_n in_o stead_n of_o contentment_n we_o often_o lose_v substance_n for_o shadow_n and_o felicity_n by_o over-searching_a it_o there_o be_v a_o proportion_n of_o wit_n most_o conducible_a to_o this_o world_n resolution_n and_o happiness_n if_o we_o exceed_v or_o come_v short_a of_o that_o element_n either_o the_o height_n and_o fineness_n of_o the_o air_n agree_v not_o with_o our_o lung_n and_o subsistence_n or_o we_o be_v dampt_v and_o suffocate_v in_o a_o over_o earthly_a and_o phlegmatic_a dulness_n as_o in_o square_a pave_v stone_n such_o only_o endure_v the_o earth_n and_o open_a weather_n as_o be_v neither_o overhard_a nor_o soft_a so_o be_v it_o in_o the_o temper_n of_o man_n spirit_n for_o the_o undergo_n of_o this_o world_n incident_n happy_a such_o as_o most_o slight_o pass_v through_o it_o yea_o god_n himself_o require_v that_o we_o esteem_v it_o as_o but_o a_o passage_n to_o eternity_n a_o point_n a_o nothing_o in_o respect_n he_o only_o can_v fill_v and_o satisfy_v the_o curious_a soul_n i_o can_v be_v sorry_a that_o the_o pleasure_n of_o this_o life_n concern_v i_o neither_o in_o use_n nor_o affection_n when_o i_o consider_v their_o sting_n their_o molestation_n and_o emptiness_n compare_v with_o the_o sweet_a comfort_n of_o god_n favour_n and_o the_o blessedness_n of_o everlasting_a life_n there_o like_o the_o upper_a region_n dwell_v all_o peace_n purity_n and_o glory_n here_o all_o corruption_n meteor_n of_o imperfect_a mixtion_n storm_n and_o calamity_n there_o be_v our_o true_a country_n and_o region_n where_o when_o god_n shall_v have_v refine_v we_o we_o shall_v live_v and_o shine_v more_o glorious_a than_o the_o star_n i_o have_v promiscuous_o specify_v the_o cause_n and_o original_n of_o my_o melancholy_a disease_n i_o be_v deep_o engage_v in_o it_o before_o i_o suspect_v it_o and_o have_v give_v so_o much_o way_n to_o it_o to_o take_v root_n in_o i_o as_o make_v the_o cure_n most_o difficult_a it_o be_v a_o goliath_n but_o we_o must_v not_o like_a david_n fight_v against_o it_o with_o our_o own_o arm_n
the_o grace_n of_o god_n be_v all-sufficient_a but_o humane_a strength_n most_o incompetent_a once_o discover_v i_o manful_o resist_v it_o else_o i_o have_v never_o near_o so_o long_o subsist_v i_o use_v diversion_n which_o be_v the_o humane_a first_o second_o and_o best_a remedy_n i_o oppose_v labour_n &_o constantia_n ferendo_fw-la &_o feriendo_fw-la like_o a_o parthian_a i_o flee_v and_o fight_v but_o prayer_n have_v be_v my_o most_o effectual_a remedy_n it_o be_v a_o devil_n that_o be_v not_o otherwise_o cast_v out_o physic_n be_v a_o feeble_a exorcism_n but_o when_o by_o hearty_a prayer_n i_o humble_v myself_o to_o god_n and_o implore_v his_o aid_n i_o ever_o rise_v from_o the_o ground_n like_o a_o other_o antaeus_n with_o renew_v and_o revive_v spirit_n god_n make_v i_o thankful_a for_o his_o mercy_n have_v surpass_v the_o transcendency_n of_o my_o folly_n happy_a the_o wound_n that_o meet_v with_o that_o good_a samaritan_n happy_a the_o disease_n that_o bring_v we_o to_o the_o cure_n of_o such_o a_o physician_n i_o have_v read_v how_o plutarch_n complain_v of_o man_n infirmity_n who_o can_v in_o nothing_o keep_v or_o measure_n or_o constancy_n in_o truth_n affection_n in_o our_o mind_n resemble_v overmuch_o the_o motion_n of_o the_o wind_n in_o the_o air_n they_o rise_v and_o take_v their_o course_n sometime_o in_o moderation_n sometime_o in_o storm_n they_o discontinue_v they_o change_v they_o whirl_v and_o all_o so_o strange_o and_o irregular_a as_o we_o neither_o can_v well_o conceive_v or_o control_n we_o neither_o know_v whence_o they_o proceed_v nor_o where_o they_o will_v end_v the_o object_n of_o our_o pleasure_n and_o discourse_n possess_v we_o with_o a_o drunkenness_n with_o a_o giddiness_n the_o strong_a and_o hot_a mind_n be_v most_o intent_n most_o mercurial_a most_o unsettled_a and_o volatile_a thence_o have_v grow_v a_o observation_n of_o the_o frequent_a change_n and_o trouble_n in_o the_o florentine_a more_o than_o the_o venetian_a state_n now_o what_o mean_n have_v we_o to_o fix_v this_o mercury_n the_o natural_a temper_n be_v hard_o to_o alter_v the_o inconstant_a body_n act_v too_o much_o upon_o the_o soul_n thou_o o_o god_n can_v only_o effect_v so_o great_a and_o supernatural_a a_o work_n faith_n alone_a and_o a_o christian_a hope_n can_v become_v the_o anchor_n of_o our_o soul_n to_o maintain_v they_o firm_a and_o secure_a against_o our_o own_o and_o the_o world_n wind_n wave_n and_o rock_n no_o other_o than_o thy_o divine_a armour_n can_v resist_v no_o other_o than_o thy_o divine_a water_n can_v quench_v the_o fiery_a dart_n which_o satan_n and_o the_o world_n throw_v against_o we_o and_o ourselves_o shoot_v to_o fall_v on_o our_o own_o head_n thou_o who_o make_v we_o can_v only_o mend_v we_o thou_o be_v the_o sole_a physician_n of_o the_o soul_n our_o knowledge_n be_v imperfect_a in_o the_o flow_n of_o our_o blood_n our_o elementary_a humour_n and_o the_o anatomy_n of_o the_o body_n much_o more_o in_o the_o motion_n of_o the_o mind_n thou_o oh_o god_n who_o make_v it_o and_o inspire_v it_o understand_v it_o better_a than_o ourselves_o it_o be_v of_o thy_o privative_a jurisdiction_n and_o thou_o alone_o can_v steer_v can_v rectify_v and_o fix_v it_o we_o mis-know_a ourselves_o and_o thou_o when_o we_o attribute_v to_o ourselves_o a_o presumptuous_a selfe-ruling_a power_n we_o have_v not_o motion_n but_o from_o thou_o by_o thou_o and_o through_o thy_o daily_a providence_n support_n and_o assistance_n it_o be_v so_o in_o all_o creature_n in_o many_o of_o they_o their_o motion_n be_v without_o discourse_n and_o involuntary_a but_o in_o we_o thou_o give_v the_o will_n and_o the_o deed_n january_n 13._o 1637._o how_o sacred_a and_o serious_a aught_o to_o be_v and_o be_v our_o religion_n how_o in_o this_o galley_n most_o look_v one_o way_n and_o row_v another_o how_o yet_o some_o people_n entertain_v sin_n with_o a_o national_a denization_n some_o ironical_o sport_n and_o play_v with_o they_o as_o nature_n game_n some_o make_v they_o venial_a which_o in_o god_n audit_n will_v find_v another_o account_n to_o what_o cross_a battery_n of_o honour_n nature_n law_n custom_n and_o religion_n be_v our_o frailty_n expose_v poor_a humane_a soul_n curious_a of_o rectitude_n curious_a of_o knowledge_n no_o wonder_n that_o thou_o suffer_v such_o distraction_n such_o convulsion_n example_n which_o shall_v rectify_v thou_o betray_v thou_o thy_o leader_n who_o shall_v guide_v thou_o in_o a_o clear_a and_o constant_a way_n wander_v and_o confound_v thou_o and_o in_o their_o partial_a and_o self-interessed_n subtlety_n lose_v themselves_o and_o thou_o natural_o i_o affect_v truth_n and_o be_o impatient_a of_o imperfection_n especial_o such_o as_o i_o appear_v capable_a to_o remedy_n and_o till_o i_o seem_v to_o discover_v what_o may_v be_v commodious_a and_o rational_a i_o can_v resolve_v but_o right_a and_o truth_n have_v so_o various_a a_o aspect_n and_o dwell_v in_o such_o a_o cloud_n and_o crossness_n of_o apprehension_n that_o if_o god_n of_o his_o great_a grace_n make_v not_o himself_o the_o guide_n of_o the_o good_a well-affected_a soul_n it_o stray_v it_o lose_v itself_o and_o become_v overwhelm_v with_o this_o world_n confusion_n and_o obliquity_n thus_o work_v my_o fancy_n thus_o accidental_o enfeeble_v be_o i_o put_v according_a to_o my_o nature_n to_o walk_v strong_o in_o weakness_n moderation_n be_v the_o hard_a of_o virtue_n my_o daily_a prayer_n to_o the_o almighty_a shall_v be_v that_o he_o will_v please_v to_o bestow_v it_o upon_o i_o i_o great_o need_v it_o against_o my_o nature_n against_o myself_o i_o be_o at_o at_o a_o evil_a exigent_n employment_n i_o want_v and_o be_o weak_a to_o undergo_v it_o yet_o idleness_n and_o vacuity_n of_o thought_n as_o unnatural_a unto_o i_o i_o can_v bear_v i_o have_v do_v and_o will_v endeavour_v my_o uttermost_a to_o compose_v myself_o to_o subsist_v and_o entertain_v myself_o towards_o god_n my_o neighbour_n and_o myself_o in_o the_o most_o religious_a discreet_a and_o charitable_a temper_n that_o i_o can_v etc._n etc._n december_n 11._o 1637._o it_o be_v hard_a for_o a_o man_n to_o dissect_v and_o paint_v out_o himself_o yet_o have_v i_o thus_o adventure_v upon_o it_o according_a to_o the_o life_n and_o truth_n and_o without_o flattery_n in_o a_o look_a glass_n they_o say_v we_o see_v ourselves_o by_o reflection_n of_o the_o beam_n of_o our_o sight_n upon_o ourselves_o in_o the_o mirror_n of_o my_o misfortune_n i_o have_v thus_o reflect_v upon_o myself_o but_o i_o confess_v true_a discern_v be_v towards_o outward_a object_n we_o be_v natural_o blind_a to_o ourselves_o beside_o the_o mist_n that_o self-love_n and_o interest_n raise_v upon_o we_o i_o have_v touch_v in_o one_o passage_n that_o the_o melancholy_a humour_n and_o choler_n adust_a must_v not_o be_v violent_o stir_v in_o respect_n of_o the_o rage_n and_o distemper_v it_o often_o so_o procure_v in_o full_a and_o soul_n especial_o long_o unstirred_a body_n but_o i_o profess_v my_o course_n have_v be_v by_o all_o mean_n inward_a and_o outward_a to_o search_v it_o to_o the_o root_n i_o go_v much_o upon_o the_o rule_n of_o quod_fw-la movet_fw-la removet_fw-la expurgation_n and_o what_o i_o hear_v once_o from_o a_o good_a doctor_n that_o obstinate_a insisting_n often_o work_v great_a and_o strange_a effect_n i_o have_v long_o for_o bear_v physic_n even_o when_o i_o most_o need_v it_o so_o still_o incorrespondent_a have_v my_o condition_n be_v unto_o itself_o some_o reason_n i_o have_v that_o neither_o i_o can_v nor_o will_v admit_v it_o but_o have_v i_o not_o by_o god_n instruction_n and_o long_a degree_n bring_v myself_o to_o be_v able_a to_o work_v upon_o myself_o in_o a_o extraordinary_a way_n exercise_v myself_o by_o his_o support_n and_o support_v myself_o in_o a_o great_a strength_n of_o body_n and_o mind_n i_o can_v not_o near_o have_v subsist_v i_o have_v by_o many_o year_n and_o degree_n bring_v myself_o to_o it_o it_o be_v for_o i_o alone_o and_o therefore_o i_o can_v prescribe_v anything_o therein_o to_o other_o there_o be_v a_o mean_a and_o discretion_n belong_v to_o all_o thing_n but_o certain_o melancholy_a obstruction_n be_v so_o tough_a and_o lead-like_a that_o they_o be_v immovable_a to_o ordinary_a course_n and_o medicine_n and_o extraordinary_a must_v be_v cautious_o and_o gradual_o employ_v inveterate_a they_o consist_v of_o a_o fat_a waxen_a viscous_a impacted_a and_o tartarous_a substance_n such_o as_o vegetable_n slip_v by_o without_o penetration_n mineral_n be_v more_o effectual_a in_o such_o a_o difference_n as_o betwixt_o the_o stroke_n of_o a_o cudgel_n or_o sword_n a_o natural_a crisis_n and_o evacuation_n be_v above_o all_o but_o we_o have_v so_o clog_v and_o entangle_v ourselves_o beyond_o the_o quiet_a of_o nature_n and_o of_o other_o creature_n that_o be_v and_o physic_n be_v thereupon_o become_v more_o necessary_a in_o truth_n
though_o the_o melancholic_a patient_n have_v a_o wolf_n by_o the_o ear_n of_o his_o disease_n trouble_v in_o hold_v and_o stir_v and_o unsafe_a to_o let_v go_v yet_o i_o esteem_v it_o a_o poor_a resolution_n to_o suffer_v a_o root_a mischief_n which_o be_v present_o noxious_a and_o will_v more_o and_o more_o grow_v dangerous_a upon_o fear_n of_o adventure_n where_o there_o be_v any_o the_o least_o hope_n of_o deliver_v ourselves_o in_o supportable_a evil_n admit_v and_o excite_v rather_o to_o any_o hazard_n than_o a_o miserable_a toleration_n a_o hopeless_a condition_n be_v most_o calamitous_a a_o well-built_a body_n will_v endure_v and_o work_v out_o very_o much_o like_o a_o good_a ship_n against_o soul_n weather_n at_o sea_n i_o i_o thank_v god_n be_v such_o that_o have_v not_o my_o mind_n like_o a_o evil_a steersman_n infinite_o even_o of_o late_a be_v injurious_a unto_o it_o i_o have_v by_o god_n grace_n infallible_o prevail_v both_o against_o my_o giant_n disease_n and_o infinite_a intervening_a unfriendly_a accident_n but_o by_o god_n help_n i_o daily_o mend_v and_o hope_v to_o leap_v over_o the_o wall_n nil_fw-la desperandum_fw-la in_o christo_fw-la nil_fw-la auspice_n christo._n l'industrie_n est_fw-fr de_fw-fr nous_fw-fr l'heâ—rex_fw-la suceez_fw-fr de_fw-fr dieu_fw-fr december_n 11._o 1637._o to_o give_v we_o courage_n in_o misfortune_n it_o be_v well_o say_v of_o fortune_n that_o her_o course_n be_v irregular_a and_o that_o we_o ought_v not_o to_o despair_v of_o she_o for_o often_o when_o she_o appear_v to_o threaten_v we_o with_o imminent_a ruin_n she_o be_v true_o in_o the_o article_n and_o catastrophe_n of_o our_o good_a and_o advantage_n it_o be_v more_o verify_v in_o the_o way_n of_o god_n nothing_o more_o ordinary_a with_o he_o then_o by_o humble_v we_o to_o exalt_v we_o and_o to_o strew_v the_o path_n to_o heaven_n with_o affliction_n caesar_n animate_v his_o pilot_n by_o carry_v he_o and_o his_o fortune_n it_o be_v a_o vain_a presumption_n but_o he_o who_o the_o almighty_a be_v pilot_n to_o can_v sink_v nor_o miscarry_v to_o demonstrate_v his_o power_n and_o awake_v the_o faith_n of_o his_o favourite_n he_o permit_v as_o to_o his_o disciple_n the_o storm_n to_o rise_v and_o wave_n to_o threaten_v destruction_n and_o in_o his_o mighty_a and_o supernatural_a reskue_n appear_v his_o sweet_a comfort_n his_o great_a glory_n nec_fw-la deus_fw-la intersit_fw-la nisi_fw-la dignus_fw-la vindice_fw-la nodus_fw-la as_o the_o divine_n affirm_v that_o tentation_n proceed_v from_o the_o devil_n may_v be_v distinguish_v by_o their_o violent_a and_o sudden_a surprise_n so_o may_v divine_a deliverance_n be_v infallible_o know_v by_o the_o sudden_a and_o extraordinary_a help_n that_o we_o receive_v from_o they_o at_o such_o time_n as_o our_o condition_n appear_v unto_o we_o most_o irremediable_a and_o desperate_a i_o have_v infinite_a matter_n and_o thanks_o to_o render_v to_o my_o maker_n to_o my_o saviour_n but_o in_o nothing_o more_o than_o that_o of_o his_o abundant_a mercy_n he_o have_v be_v please_v to_o lead_v i_o through_o sea_n through_o wilderness_n of_o trouble_n and_o error_n by_o a_o cloud_n by_o fire_n by_o the_o thunder_n of_o his_o voice_n by_o infinite_a wonder_n for_o near_o forty_o year_n together_o to_o bring_v meat_n last_o to_o his_o happy_a land_n of_o promise_n that_o be_v to_o peace_n joy_n and_o repose_v in_o he_o where_o alone_o flow_v all_o true_a happiness_n and_o fix_a contentment_n there_o can_v in_o truth_n be_v no_o constant_a courage_n without_o a_o firm_a faith_n and_o assurance_n of_o god_n favour_n towards_o we_o that_o alone_o fortify_v we_o against_o danger_n darkness_n and_o death_n december_n 12._o 1637._o it_o be_v true_o say_v that_o we_o know_v so_o much_o as_o we_o put_v in_o practice_n nor_o be_v the_o notion_n and_o float_a impression_n of_o the_o brain_n without_o a_o through_o tincture_n of_o the_o heart_n and_o soul_n any_o effectual_a science_n and_o so_o it_o be_v that_o virtue_n be_v constitute_v a_o habit_n and_o not_o only_o a_o babble_a scientifical_a discourse_n of_o the_o mind_n until_o i_o consider_v this_o i_o often_o wonder_v to_o see_v the_o best_a clerk_n often_o the_o worst_a man_n as_o well_o as_o none_o of_o wise_a man_n read_v and_o study_v common_o rather_o for_o curiosity_n to_o censure_v to_o learn_v language_n and_o the_o course_n and_o manner_n of_o the_o world_n to_o maintain_v a_o side_n to_o gain_v bread_n and_o knowledge_n like_o other_o man_n rather_o than_o truth_n virtue_n and_o piety_n to_o gather_v opinion_n and_o to_o appear_v good_a rather_o than_o to_o be_v propound_v to_o ourselves_o wrong_v object_n no_o wonder_n if_o we_o miss_v the_o right_n which_o make_v so_o many_o scholar_n who_o study_n to_o get_v the_o best_a live_n less_o virtuous_a in_o their_o life_n than_o other_o who_o more_o virtuous_o and_o spiritual_o then_o worldly_a affect_v study_v rather_o to_o nourish_v then_o cloth_n to_o die_v then_o paint_v their_o mind_n corrupt_a nature_n like_o a_o deprave_a stomach_n turn_v and_o assimilate_v all_o nourishment_n it_o make_v a_o alien_n of_o foreign_a instruction_n and_o govern_v itself_o by_o its_o own_o law_n nay_o ordinary_o against_o our_o will_n and_o resolution_n nature_n relapse_n and_o ravish_v we_o from_o our_o moral_n from_o our_o metaphysicals_n sensuality_n prevail_v and_o we_o prevaricate_v with_o our_o conscience_n when_o i_o approach_v god_n sanctuary_n this_o be_v yet_o less_o strange_a unto_o i_o there_o as_o copernicus_n have_v place_v the_o sun_n in_o the_o centre_n of_o this_o universe_n who_o influence_n and_o magnetic_a virtue_n give_v life_n and_o motion_n to_o all_o material_a creature_n so_o be_v it_o clear_a that_o the_o immaterial_a mind_n of_o man_n have_v its_o life_n and_o motion_n only_o from_o the_o good_a spirit_n of_o god_n and_o unless_o by_o his_o influence_n and_o inspiration_n he_o carry_v our_o instruction_n and_o information_n to_o the_o root_n except_o he_o alter_v reform_v and_o season_v our_o heart_n like_o hasty_a shower_n all_o pass_v away_o whereas_o a_o sound_a heavenly_a dew_n work_v a_o better_a water_v and_o fruitfulness_n want_v of_o that_o divine_a irradiation_n make_v we_o such_o mungrill_n such_o half_a christian_n as_o we_o ordinary_o be_v acknowledge_v our_o faith_n and_o saviour_n in_o our_o tongue_n and_o deny_v he_o in_o our_o life_n god_n of_o his_o great_a grace_n grant_v we_o his_o save_a spirit_n and_o we_o shall_v as_o well_o practice_n as_o seem_v to_o know_v and_o profess_v amen_o amen_n december_n 14._o 1637._o no_o wonder_n that_o i_o search_v into_o the_o abstruse_a cause_n and_o proceed_n of_o my_o disease_n for_o i_o be_o a_o wonder_n to_o myself_o that_o a_o sanguine_a complexion_n with_o a_o natural_a strength_n of_o body_n and_o mind_n and_o none_o of_o the_o most_o impertinent_a in_o wit_n and_o discourse_n shall_v fall_v into_o so_o great_a a_o confusion_n and_o consumption_n of_o mind_n body_n and_o fortune_n without_o some_o outward_a most_o apparent_a violence_n but_o beside_o what_o i_o have_v former_o express_v i_o consider_v that_o steep_v myself_o in_o my_o beginning_n in_o the_o study_n of_o mountain_n essay_n which_o be_v full_a of_o scepticism_n and_o a_o kind_n of_o moral_a mortification_n in_o cry_v down_o the_o delight_n and_o presumption_n of_o this_o world_n prove_v to_o a_o taint_a and_o tender_a mind_n a_o great_a amatement_n and_o blunt_v with_o a_o anxious_a disposition_n of_o doubt_n in_o the_o ordinary_a course_n and_o pleasure_n of_o this_o life_n that_o and_o much_o adverse_a accident_n nip_v i_o in_o my_o first_o spring_n otherwise_o in_o all_o probability_n i_o who_o in_o that_o lowness_n and_o oppression_n of_o spirit_n which_o have_v possess_v i_o can_v yet_o so_o bear_v up_o as_o in_o some_o measure_n to_o become_v seek_v and_o respect_v by_o the_o better_a sort_n may_v have_v be_v somewhat_o more_o than_o i_o have_v be_v in_o the_o eminency_n of_o this_o world_n but_o the_o great_a and_o good_a god_n have_v otherwise_o ordain_v nor_o be_o i_o without_o hope_n that_o he_o who_o have_v to_o this_o day_n so_o wonderful_o support_v and_o convert_v i_o will_v thereby_o work_v his_o glory_n and_o my_o good_a it_o be_v true_a that_o my_o course_n have_v be_v most_o improsperous_a yet_o never_o of_o a_o gross_o irrational_a or_o unthrifty_a election_n i_o have_v in_o truth_n be_v so_o far_o from_o humour_v myself_o in_o the_o impulsion_n of_o nature_n or_o most_o delightful_a object_n of_o my_o fancy_n that_o i_o have_v main_o resist_v myself_o therein_o it_o have_v please_v god_n to_o make_v i_o a_o instrument_n of_o cross_v and_o punish_v myself_o in_o whatsoever_o i_o most_o place_v my_o mind_n the_o obstinate_a continuance_n of_o my_o disease_n and_o the_o fail_n of_o those_o who_o i_o have_v trust_v and_o rely_v upon_o have_v abuse_v i_o i_o have_v lose_v much_o
pleasure_n and_o profit_n whereof_o i_o may_v have_v be_v capable_a but_o for_o myself_o i_o regret_n it_o not_o for_o alas_o how_o vain_a how_o transitory_a how_o full_a of_o vexation_n be_v the_o best_a of_o earthly_a commodity_n etc._n etc._n truth_n have_v be_v say_v to_o be_v the_o object_n of_o the_o understanding_n and_o good_a of_o the_o will_v totus_fw-la teres_fw-la atque_fw-la rotundus_fw-la express_v a_o honest_a man_n yet_o a_o bowl_n perfect_o round_a except_o upon_o a_o ground_n exact_o plain_a hold_v not_o well_o its_o straight_a line_n and_o way_n a_o strong_a bias_n better_o maintain_v itself_o against_o whampe_n and_o unevennesse_n so_o do_v a_o man_n bias_v with_o some_o sinister_a affection_n often_o run_v a_o more_o constant_a and_o thrive_a course_n than_o he_o who_o have_v constitute_v truth_n and_o true_a good_a his_o mistress_n but_o himself_o be_v round_o and_o his_o way_n uncertain_a and_o uneven_a he_o vary_v and_o fluctuate_v according_o as_o i_o have_v often_o say_v truth_n to_o we_o be_v such_o obscure_a high_a twinkle_a star_n that_o we_o hardly_o fasten_v upon_o they_o what_o please_v we_o be_v only_o certain_a unto_o we_o i_o speak_v in_o a_o natural_a way_n for_o supernatural_o in_o faith_n alone_o be_v all_o truth_n all_o good_a certainty_n and_o pleasure_n till_o god_n give_v i_o that_o happy_a gift_n i_o be_v a_o bowl_n without_o bias_n a_o ship_n without_o steer_n or_o star_n i_o be_v more_o than_o most_o miserable_a if_o my_o resentment_n my_o heart_n and_o affection_n be_v set_v upon_o this_o world_n but_o i_o humble_o thank_v god_n it_o be_v far_o otherwise_o with_o i_o and_o now_o as_o there_o ever_o have_v be_v a_o difference_n make_v between_o such_o as_o cast_v themselves_o into_o open_a and_o eminent_a mischief_n and_o such_o as_o fall_v into_o unhappy_a consequence_n of_o evil_n unforeseen_a so_o hope_v i_o to_o find_v favour_n i_o and_o pardon_n from_o the_o better_a sort_n and_o the_o worst_a i_o respect_v not_o and_o as_o that_o prince_n who_o plain_a in_o personage_n and_o habit_n be_v by_o mistake_v set_v to_o drudge_n for_o his_o own_o entertainment_n and_o be_v discover_v and_o demand_v what_o he_o mean_v answer_v that_o he_o do_v penance_n for_o his_o evil-favourednesse_a so_o be_o i_o content_v to_o undergo_v and_o submit_v myself_o to_o the_o not_o undeserved_a penance_n of_o my_o fate_n with_o a_o acquiescence_n of_o fiat_n voluntas_fw-la tua_fw-la sed_fw-la libre_fw-la a_o nos_fw-la a_o malo_fw-la january_n 2._o 1637._o nemo_fw-la laeditur_fw-la nisi_fw-la a_o seipso_fw-la never_o prove_v itself_o more_o true_a then_o in_o i_o i_o have_v be_v both_o agent_n and_o author_n of_o my_o misery_n and_o suffering_n i_o have_v be_v both_o criminal_a and_o tormenter_n god_n make_v i_o strong_a i_o have_v make_v myself_o weak_a god_n entrust_v i_o with_o many_o talent_n of_o advantage_n above_o other_o i_o have_v misemployed_n and_o abuse_v they_o and_o myself_o from_o my_o youth_n i_o have_v suffer_v his_o scourge_n and_o terror_n with_o a_o trouble_a soul_n yet_o such_o be_v his_o mercy_n unto_o i_o that_o it_o be_v good_a and_o happy_a for_o i_o that_o i_o have_v be_v trouble_v as_o i_o have_v turn_v unto_o he_o he_o have_v be_v gracious_o please_v to_o turn_v his_o countenance_n of_o favour_n towards_o i_o heal_v my_o wound_n with_o the_o sovereign_a balm_n of_o his_o grace_n and_o refresh_v my_o soul_n with_o his_o water_n of_o life_n humble_v i_o to_o exalt_v i_o and_o chastise_v i_o in_o a_o fatherly_a correction_n to_o prevent_v my_o eternal_a punishment_n how_o sweet_a oh_o lord_n be_v thy_o mercy_n beyond_o comparison_n beyond_o my_o expression_n the_o false_a and_o flatter_a joy_n of_o sensuality_n be_v mere_a sourness_n bitterness_n and_o vexation_n in_o respect_n continue_v thy_o grace_n unto_o i_o perfect_a thy_o own_o work_n and_o make_v i_o a_o instrument_n of_o thy_o glory_n confirm_v i_o in_o the_o contempt_n of_o this_o world_n vanity_n and_o as_o on_o i_o so_o work_v upon_o the_o world_n by_o thy_o almighty_a spirit_n thy_o save_a health_n that_o thy_o will_n may_v be_v do_v in_o earth_n as_o in_o heaven_n nothing_o but_o thy_o all-powerfull_a spirit_n can_v effect_v it_o draw_v we_o and_o we_o shall_v come_v and_o let_v it_o be_v through_o tribulation_n sorrow_n fire_n and_o whatsoever_o long_a or_o short_a a_o fair_a or_o rugged_a way_n so_o it_o lead_v to_o thou_o we_o shall_v be_v happy_a above_o measure_n amen_o amen_n sweet_a saviour_n let_v thy_o precious_a wound_n cure_v i_o and_o save_v my_o soul_n which_o be_v by_o purchase_v thou_o january_n 15._o 1637._o beauty_n and_o the_o delight_n of_o the_o eye_n consist_v in_o well-ordered_a lustre_n of_o colour_n proportion_n and_o motion_n yet_o forbear_v it_o not_o to_o be_v extraordinary_o affect_v in_o the_o enjoy_n of_o such_o object_n as_o the_o appetite_n and_o fantasy_n have_v prescribe_v to_o themselves_o for_o a_o necessary_a or_o voluptuous_a satisfaction_n whereby_o 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world_n delight_n be_v our_o proper_a portion_n of_o thy_o assignment_n but_o thy_o great_a grace_n have_v enlighten_v i_o and_o with_o a_o strong_a hand_n teach_v i_o to_o choose_v the_o better_a part_n i_o have_v since_o thy_o illumination_n affect_v above_o all_o thing_n to_o set_v forth_o thy_o grace_n mercy_n and_o glory_n but_o pardon_v i_o oh_o lord_n they_o surpass_v my_o poor_a ability_n i_o be_o a_o earthen_a vessel_n weak_a and_o craze_a as_o unable_a as_o unworthy_a to_o be_v a_o fit_a instrument_n to_o sound_v forth_o thy_o praise_n i_o be_v ambitious_a to_o have_v wrought_v thy_o divine_a love_n upon_o other_o that_o they_o with_o i_o may_v constitute_v thou_o the_o sole_a scope_n and_o lord_n of_o their_o counsel_n their_o project_n their_o action_n but_o a_o full_a and_o rich_a magazine_n than_o i_o and_o a_o strong_a health_n be_v require_v pardon_v oh_o lord_n that_o i_o withdraw_v myself_o conscious_a of_o my_o weakness_n and_o inability_n but_o what_o my_o pen_n can_v attain_v my_o tongue_n and_o action_n shall_v by_o thy_o grace_n endeavour_v to_o supply_v january_n 14._o 1637._o charity_n imply_v the_o love_n of_o god_n and_o man_n without_o it_o whatsoever_o we_o pretend_v we_o be_v infidel_n object_n of_o hatred_n to_o our_o maker_n to_o our_o inferior_n what_o condition_n can_v be_v more_o contemptible_a no_o delight_n be_v comparable_a to_o that_o which_o reflect_v upon_o a_o good_a mind_n from_o its_o own_o goodness_n extend_v upon_o other_o especial_o when_o our_o conscience_n bear_v we_o witness_v that_o we_o do_v it_o out_o of_o a_o true_a love_n and_o obedience_n to_o our_o most_o merciful_a and_o omnipotent_a god_n to_o pretend_v faith_n and_o be_v without_o charity_n be_v to_o mock_v god_n and_o ourselves_o better_o be_v it_o for_o we_o to_o be_v like_o beast_n without_o all_o knowledge_n of_o god_n then_o to_o play_v
or_o the_o world_n to_o hope_v the_o least_o good_a effect_n from_o any_o production_n of_o i_o you_o have_v often_o in_o your_o course_n and_o profession_n give_v and_o daily_o give_v better_a and_o happy_a proof_n of_o yourself_o that_o way_n the_o stuff_n second_o which_o you_o find_v in_o my_o piece_n be_v in_o truth_n and_o so_o ever_o i_o conceive_v it_o most_o unfit_a for_o the_o sight_n of_o any_o other_o than_o a_o cordial_a and_o familiar_a friend_n the_o presence_n of_o sore_n infirmity_n and_o cripple_n disease_n be_v fit_a for_o a_o hospital_n or_o almeshouse_n than_o the_o stage_n they_o excite_v pleasure_n in_o none_o and_o compassion_n but_o in_o few_o and_o well-disposed_a person_n i_o affect_v privacy_n and_o love_v not_o to_o expose_v myself_o and_o my_o error_n to_o censure_v guilty_a of_o my_o imperfection_n especial_o of_o fool_n and_o deprave_a disposition_n in_o truth_n melancholy_a and_o human_a frailty_n and_o dysaster_n will_v hardly_o meet_v with_o anyother_n idoneous_a and_o compassionate_a judge_n than_o such_o as_o have_v feel_v and_o smart_v in_o their_o sad_a unhappy_a effect_n every_o piece_n be_v intend_v the_o last_o and_o they_o be_v too_o wild_a and_o incoherent_a to_o make_v a_o team_n but_o as_o i_o have_v former_o say_v use_v your_o pleasure_n reduce_v if_o you_o will_v and_o can_v my_o chaos_n into_o method_n cut_v off_o repetition_n there_o be_v matter_n enough_o to_o prune_v and_o burn_v little_a for_o fruit_n correct_v destroy_v part_n or_o all_o if_o you_o retain_v anything_o the_o labour_n will_v be_v the_o less_o to_o let_v it_o be_v mere_o i_o and_o thus_o i_o commit_v myself_o and_o it_o to_o god_n and_o you_o his_o will_n and_o you_o be_v wrought_v on_o i_o and_o i_o february_n 12._o 1637._o true_o and_o exact_a definition_n be_v acknowledge_v to_o be_v most_o difficult_a and_o knowledge_n of_o cause_n to_o be_v most_o abstruse_a false_a division_n and_o strain_a proportion_n abuse_v we_o faculty_n and_o 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sound_v my_o retreat_n in_o thy_o own_o holy_a scripture_n thou_o have_v reveal_v thyself_o sufficient_o for_o our_o knowledge_n for_o our_o eternal_a happiness_n and_o salvation_n there_o alone_o be_v the_o habitation_n of_o light_n and_o truth_n and_o there_o alone_o and_o in_o thy_o christ_n shall_v i_o find_v thou_o i_o will_v affect_v no_o other_o knowledge_n no_o other_o writing_n be_v propitious_a unto_o i_o february_n 15._o 1637._o to_o my_o above_o mention_a friend_n the_o conclusion_n you_o have_v former_o see_v how_o i_o engage_v myself_o to_o verse_n and_o break_v loose_a from_o it_o there_o be_v indeed_o a_o kind_n of_o wantonness_n and_o constraint_n incident_a to_o it_o which_o agree_v not_o with_o my_o austerity_n and_o affect_a liberty_n i_o be_o even_o in_o prose_n too_o much_o a_o libertine_n impatient_a of_o method_n abandon_v to_o confusion_n i_o have_v partly_o though_o imperfect_o make_v to_o appear_v the_o calamitous_a progress_n of_o my_o disease_n with_o the_o happy_a and_o admirable_a deliverance_n and_o issue_n to_o the_o good_a of_o my_o soul_n and_o no_o incompetency_n in_o fortune_n wherein_o i_o doubt_v not_o but_o i_o shall_v move_v as_o well_o joy_n as_o compassion_n in_o such_o as_o be_v good_a and_o well_o affect_v towards_o i_o i_o have_v not_o be_v former_o void_a of_o good_a inclination_n my_o best_a be_v ever_o a_o affection_n to_o god_n good_a man_n and_o goodness_n but_o my_o disposition_n therein_o be_v so_o imperfect_o sanctify_v and_o fortify_v that_o it_o please_v the_o divine_a power_n to_o cast_v down_o all_o my_o fence_n to_o turn_v my_o best_a wisdom_n and_o intention_n to_o solly_n and_o to_o expose_v i_o to_o the_o scorn_n of_o such_o as_o in_o my_o natural_n i_o may_v have_v scorn_v such_o ordinary_o be_v the_o world_n and_o the_o corrupt_a disposition_n of_o man_n especial_o the_o worst_a and_o most_o degenerous_a that_o we_o over-measure_n ourselves_o by_o our_o own_o foot_n like_o lewd_a filthy_a boy_n we_o 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support_v and_o deliver_v i_o there_o be_v no_o despair_n till_o we_o become_v incapable_a of_o all_o manner_n of_o cure_n and_o subsist_v february_n 26._o 1637._o i_o have_v often_o deceive_v myself_o in_o think_v myself_o at_o my_o end_n the_o like_a happen_v in_o my_o writing_n and_o before_o i_o shut_v up_o these_o ill-favoured_a imperfect_a representation_n though_o what_o i_o have_v already_o say_v may_v partly_o satisfy_v my_o intention_n in_o express_v that_o it_o have_v be_v more_o my_o disease_n then_o myself_o which_o have_v be_v the_o chief_a actor_n in_o my_o misfortune_n yet_o know_v that_o the_o worst_a the_o strange_a and_o most_o of_o my_o story_n be_v not_o bring_v upon_o this_o paper_n stage_n it_o be_v too_o tedious_a and_o unfit_a for_o view_v not_o only_o in_o the_o story_n of_o particular_a man_n but_o even_o of_o state-resolution_n and_o public_a action_n and_o
he_o take_v but_o thrive_v so_o ill_o therein_o his_o beast_n grow_v joyless_a faint_a and_o famish_a he_o who_o depend_v much_o upon_o his_o beast_n grow_v much_o deject_v study_n care_n and_o thought_n to_o set_v all_o right_a and_o do_v all_o for_o the_o best_a bring_v he_o as_o low_o as_o first_o his_o steed_n be_v bring_v after_o much_o time_n art_n cost_n the_o beast_n become_v as_o vigorous_a and_o lusty_a as_o before_o ill_o now_o they_o sort_v the_o one_o wild_a the_o other_a tame_a zeal_n to_o his_o master_n help_v to_o make_v he_o poor_a jockey_n must_v ride_v the_o beast_n will_v run_v away_o he_o strive_v and_o pull_v and_o use_v his_o best_a of_o art_n to_o check_v his_o pride_n and_o force_v he_o to_o obey_v so_o long_o till_o both_o be_v sink_v out_o of_o heart_n the_o master_n now_o come_v in_o to_o this_o disorder_n and_o find_v jockeye_n want_v of_o strength_n and_o skill_n by_o his_o all-taming_a art_n bring_v all_o in_o order_n and_o fashion_a horse_n and_o man_n 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dear_a son_n our_o saviour_n sake_n to_o who_o with_o thou_o and_o thy_o holy_a spirit_n be_v all_o glory_n for_o ever_o amen_o amen_n march_n 20_o 1637._o this_o be_v the_o misery_n of_o writing_n and_o condition_n of_o matter_n if_o we_o pass_v thing_n slight_o over_o our_o short_a touch_n make_v little_a or_o no_o impression_n and_o if_o we_o inculcate_v they_o with_o long_a insisting_n and_o repetition_n we_o prove_v nauseous_a and_o tedious_a i_o be_o guilty_a of_o both_o my_o sun_n rise_v fair_a but_o soon_o be_v overcast_v strong_a wanton_a jovial_a active_a free_a and_o bold_a moral_o good_a by_o nature_n i_o be_v cast_v saturn_n and_o inexperience_n all_o control_v god_n i_o shall_v say_v good_a only_a i_o remain_v and_o by_o his_o goodness_n better_a goodness_n gain_v the_o cloud_n be_v go_v and_o i_o be_o over-bl_a a_o faggot_n second_o fire_n be_v sometime_o best_a poor_a busy_a fool_n walk_v fair_o to_o your_o grave_n live_v long_o you_o can_v you_o may_v die_v to_o 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and_o quiet_a retreat_n from_o the_o world_n and_o worldly_a care_n have_v long_o be_v as_o you_o know_v and_o still_o be_v all_o my_o ambition_n it_o be_v easy_a to_o wish_v then_o to_o find_v my_o appetite_n to_o the_o world_n be_v never_o much_o howsoever_o i_o have_v appear_v if_o ever_o it_o have_v be_v any_o thing_n it_o be_v now_o past_a my_o conversation_n be_v more_o in_o the_o other_o world_n than_o this_o and_o that_o the_o rather_o see_v if_o my_o distaste_n mislead_v i_o not_o the_o generality_n of_o man_n spirit_n be_v not_o possess_v with_o that_o sweetness_n courtesy_n familiarity_n indulgency_n and_o love_n to_o goodness_n as_o be_v wont_a to_o be_v but_o here_o my_o paper_n force_v i_o to_o a_o end_n and_o to_o profess_v myself_o as_o you_o shall_v ever_o find_v i_o 1640_o be_v sincere_o affectionate_a friend_n and_o servant_n du._n north_n sen._n a_o sudden_a free_a and_o opportune_a discourse_n to_o the_o present_a 28._o of_o march_n 1641._o our_o weather_n be_v 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