such a sort of Water but only differ in the making it you pour in some Salt and then exorcise the Devil out of both the Creatures before he was ever in them and afterwards ascribe the Lord knows what efficacy to this rare composition but for all that I believe Athenaeus's Holy Water if a man would try it is as good as yours to all intents and purposes and confers a much Grace to such as discreetly use it Durandus and the Doway-Catechism give several Pious Reasons for the Sacerdotal Tonsure Now Herodetus tells us the very same custom was used by the AEgyptian Priests but they as we are informed by him did it not upon the score of Religion but only to keep themselves from being Lousy and no question on 't shaving in that hot Climate where you see the fashion first began was very commendable and as I take it requisite for the Laity as well as the Clergy and this reason I look upon to be ten times more satisfactory and solid than what your Divines give for the Tonsure for it 's the easiest thing in the World to turn that into a Religious Observation which at first was only a Civil Custom and then to give abundance of fine plausible Reasons for the doing of it A man might easily trace the rest of your superstitious practices and tell you whence you had them but that Mr. Bays would require too much time and therefore I shall on purpose pass them by That which vexes me most is to see that the people of your Communion are not content to do these foolish ridiculous things but they must offer such reasons for them as if they were of Divine Institution Let him kiss me with the kiss of his Mouth therefore the Priest must kiss the Altar Thou shalt see my back parts therefore the Priest must turn his back to the people Wash me again therefore the Priest must wash his hands twice Put off thy Shooes for this place is holy Therefore the Bishop at Mass must change his Shooes and Stockings Christ is the Rock and therefore the Altar must be of Stone and therefore say I if such Reasons as these will hold Water two Priests may play a Game at Cards upon the Altar and do no harm at all but edify the Congregation for the Ace may put them in mind of the Unity and the Tray of the Trinity and the Knave of Iudas and so on till they have run through the whole History of the Christian Religion And thus likewise they may play at Sword and Buckler to signifie the perpetual scuffle between the Flesh and the Spirit and what a fine Buckler Faith is and thus instead of Incense they may smoak a Pipe of Tobacco which by the by is less chargeable than Incense and will serve much better to fright the Devil out of Church to denote that sinful man is Dust and Ashes and to represent the Conflagration to them Thus they may play at Blind-mans Buff to show how blind the Sons of Adam are in their Natural State and and thus they may do ten thousand such freaks as these and yet not want very good reasons to support the practice of them because there is nothing in the World too fulsom and gross for superstition to swallow and for ignorance and interest to justifie And now Mr. Bays we have run over all the objections you made against the Church of England and endeavoured to answer them Now if you please to perform the second part of your promise and give us your reasons why you settled in the Romish Communion you 'll extreamly oblige us But first Boy fill us a Dish of Tea apiece Bays Well Gentlemen I shall give you my Reasons tho I must tell you beforehand I expect no other answers to them but Banter and Drollery from persons of your complexion But as I have already been a Confessor for my Religion so if my Destinies require it I am ready to be a Martyr for it as my Brother Poet Prudentius was before me Crites Oh I understand your meaning you have lost your Laureats and Historiographers place whether you abdicated or forfeited it is not now the question Here Boy give Mr. Bays a Dish of Tea and now dear Confessor prithee begin Bays To make short work of it then being well satisfy'd of the truth of the Christian Religion but Crites And was 't thou so little Bays But how can a man believe thee Come if the truth were known I am sure thou hast the Alcoran in the belly of thee nay don't despair dear Confessor Louis le Grand will set the great Turk upon his Leggs again one of these days Bays Nay Sir if you are at that sport I have done Eugen. Why prethee Mr. Bays I took thee for a man of more Philosophy and all that than to be thus disturb'd for so small a matter I thought you had been of Socrates's opinion that all creatures could not affront you Bays I am indeed Sir and thank you heartily for reminding me of him so now I 'll proceed Being as I told you very well satisfied of the truth of the Christian Religion but not so well satisfied that the Church of England was the true Church I cast my eyes round about me and discover'd in the Church of Rome several particulars which no other Communion of Christians in the World cou'd pretend to as Infallibility Unity Uiversality Antiquity and Clemency and therefore here I settled After some conversation and experience I found here to be a Church of so severe a Discipline so examplary a Devotion so admirable an Unity so majestic a Grandeur that I believe I may be pardon'd the expression if I say she has been so far from debauching and corrupting that she has even improv'd the Christian Religion Crites Nay I 'll say that for your Church Mr. Bays she has as good a hand at improving of hints as ever any Church in the World had As for example the Rhetorical Apostrophes and Flourishes of the first Fathers to the Saints she has improved into a solemn Invocation of them Eugen. The idle conjectures of some melancholly persons about a middle place in the fourth Century she has improv'd into a real Purgatory peopled it with inhabitants and by certain refrigerium's so corrected the unwholesomness of the air that it wou'd be now nothing nigh so great a punishment to pass a winter there as any where under the Line Crites The Virgin Mary's salutation she has improved into a Prayer the Real Presence into a Corporal one the civil respect that was formerly given to the Relicks of Martyrs into a Religious Veneration of them Eugen. Primitive Institution left us only two Sacraments which she has since improv'd into seven The first Missionaries of our Religion bequeath'd but twelve Articles to be believ'd by us and she has lately improved them into the jolly number of aff's Buckram-men twenty four Crites St. Paul tells us of one
hopes that false dealing and dissimulation were of no Religion but a little experience in the World and the first year of the late Reign sufficiently convinced me of the contrary We were from all quarters arraign'd for mis-representing your Church when no body as I know of was guilty of that Crime but only your selves To say the truth Popery is like some sort of Painting which is to be view'd at a convenient distance and by an ill light for otherwise the courseness of the colours will appear too visible and upon that score it must be acknowledg'd your Missionaires lay under a temptation to palliate some of the grosser Doctrines but I question whether that way of proceeding did not do you a more sensible disadvantage than you were aware of Your Predecessors I am sure though they lay under the same inconveniences managed the cause with more sincerity they argued like Gentlemen of Honour and maintained all the controverted points as long as they were tenable at last when they were beaten out of the field they entrenched themselves behind an Ecclesiastical Mud-wall of Fathers and Councils and contented themselves as well as they could with the Churches Infallibility They had the charity to believe that most of their Adversaries could write and read that some of them had travelled abroad and now and then for curiosity peeped into a Popish Chappel and therefore thought it an ill advised policy to deny those practises that were too notorious to be disowned but generously endeavoured to defend them Whereas the modern Polemics as if they had fallen amongst a Herd of meer Indians that had never conversed with the rest of mankind were for putting the most intollerable shams in the World Your Religion was unpalatable enough of all Conscience before these Spiritual Pioneers undertook the handling of it but their awkward management made it a thousand times worse than ever Transubstantiation of it self the Lord knows is a very mortifying Self denying Doctrine but two Czars and two Transubstantiations are one too many for a Town or a Church and to oblige us to renounce our reason and senses almost in every other Doctrine as well as that was an insupportable presumption We were told Mr. Bays you never made any formal addresses to the Saints to the utter confusion of the Breviaries and the Missal and if they had told us at the same time that the Fanatics never made any formal addresses to K. James for his charitable Indulgence we could not tell how to help our selves we were informed that the Deposing Doctrine was no principle of your Church to the everlasting shame of the Laâ—eran Council that only a civil respect was paid to Images and Reliques that cutting of Throats for the score of Religion was a great sin that the Scripture was no Dumb letter no Weathercock nor Nose of Wax as was formerly given out with abundance more of such pretty Tenets for which many an honest Heretic has had his Tabernacle carbonadoed beyond Sea A certain worthy Author supposed to be Georgius Barzon the titular Bishop of Waradin in a Treatise which he dedicated to the Emperour some twelve years ago tells him that he was no longer oblig'd to tolerate the Lutherans in Hungary because tho he had sworn to make no invasions upon the Augustan Confession yet he was at large now whether he would observe his Oath or no since the Protestants had departed in several particulars which he there mentions from that Confession After this followed as all the world knows one of the bloodiest Scenes that ever that Country saw which whether it were owing to this Incendiaries Sophistry I cannot tell but any one may see he was a well-wisher to the design Now if we Mr. Bays had been so malicious as to have trumped the same Card upon your Priests writ a Letter to the Pope and told him Worthy Sir Whereas certain persons here in the Kingdom of England who pretend themselves to be true Catholics have shamefully denied and misrepresented most of the established Doctrines of your Church have discarded your deposing power and made you dwindle from the Universal Bishop into the Western Patriarch nay and to do greater affronts to your unerring Person have acquainted all His Majesty's Subjects that you eat and drink just for all the world like other men and keep a Close Stool too for your private occasions nothing of which we could have believed before This is to acquaint your Infallibility with their Names and Offences that you may reduce them to their duty in time for we are afraid if they continue still to make the same advances into Heresie as they began that they 'l every man of them turn Protestants before the year 's ended and so become chargeable to the Parishes where they live Had we done this Mr. Bays as you know we had reason enough to do it I dare not take upon me to conjecture what had been the event whether immuring between four Walls or a Pilgrimage to Lapland or their Ecclesiastical Livery pull'd over their Ears but certain I am that he had disown'd them for his Sons as heartily as a former Pope disowned a certain French Bishop that was sent to him in his Military Habit. As I was a saying before Mr. Bays your Predecessors managed the controversie much more like Gentlemen than those that pretended to manage it after them in the late Reign If they palmed any spurious Fathers upon us it is to be considered that such artifices were the ancient laudable practice of their Church witness Constantine's Charter and the forgery of the Nicene Canons that they found them ready cut and dried to their hands and so drew them out of the Papal Armory to support a declining cause that could not otherwise subsist and how far this policy is allowable in a state of war I leave it for the Casuists to judge After all Forgery it self as odious and despicable as it looks is not in my opinion half so black a crime as down-right lying as you know Mr. Bays counterfeiting another mans hand is nothing near so bad as denying his own There is some art and dexterity required in the one but there is nothing but barefaced impudence or cowardise in the other He that puts false Dice upon me at play will be reckned as the world goes now adays an expert Gamester and I only to be blamed that would suffer my self to be so imposed upon but he that shall tell me Seven and Four is not Eleven or that a Deuce is a Cinque is to be used after another manner Therefore I could methinks willingly excuse your Ancestors who conjured up some supposititious Authors to defend the principles of their Church because it had been our fault if we had not discoverd the trick but I shall never forgive those everlasting Blockheads that disowned most of the Doctrines of their Religion all the while they were a practising them within doors If it had been
they say in the Lake of Sodom Feathers sink and Iron swims All the World knows how remarkably Costerus and several other of your Divines have refined upon this point and 't is observable in your Canon Law that so many Acts of Fornication are required to make the Indictment large enough to comprehend a poor Sinner that they 'l excuse not only the immortal Theodora's and Marozia's of former Ages and the Donna Olympia's of this but perhaps all the She-traders since the times of Rahab and Lots Daughters A Woman had need now a days if the Doctrine of your Church be true to live as long as one of the Patriarchs Wives before the Flood to have time enough to work out the painful and laborious Character of a Whore But we Mr. Bays dare not play such tricks with Religion dubb Vices by the Name of Virtues or what is full as bad keep a disputable Virtue at the expence of keeping at the same time an unquestionable Sin whatever interest or advantage may suggest we dare not make such large purliews for outlying Consciences not we Mr. Bays Nobis non licet esse tam disertis Qui legem colimus severiorem Eugen. As my friend very well observes Mr. Bays we don't think it worth the while to maintain a controverted virtue at the expence of maintaining an uncontroverted Sin while you of the Church of Rome have never a Virtue to boast of that is not attended with some Crimnal Inconveniences Thus you maintain your pretended Chastity at the expence of allowing publick Fornication your obedience to your Patriarch at the expence of Sacrificing your obedience to your natural Prince your Monastic Poverty at the expence of Perjury and Hypocrisie your Unity at the expence of an Unchristian Inquisition the Grandeur of your Worship at the expence of Idolatry your pretension to Miracles and Antiquity at the expence of Lying and Forgery your Charity at the expence of Superstition and lastly the Devotion of your People at the expence of Ignorance and the Unpardonable Sacriledge of taking away their Bibles Crites Nay sometimes Mr. Bays matters go worse with you as for example when you perswade People to the utter undoing of their Families to leave all they have to a lazy Herd of Spiritual Gluttons for the saying of their Souls when you perswade young Virgins in defiance of their Parents to run into a Nunnery for the obtaining of Heaven when you perswade Wives to leave their Husbands Husbands to leave their Wives Kings to oppress their Subjects Subjects to depose their Kings for the remission of their sins this is unless I am mistaken making one sin compound and attone for another like a decay'd Tradesman that borrows Money in one place and contracts a fresh Debt to pay off one of a longer standing Eugen. So now Mr. Bays if you think fit we 'll shut our hands of Celibacy for I 'm as weary of it as a Poet is of a discourse of Religion a young Lawyer of Navigation a Citizen of Heraldry or a Courtier of Trade we have dwelt too long upon this point and 't is high time now to proceed to a new one Bays Well Sir if you find it burns your fingers I am content to drop it not but that it is still tenable enough and may be defended on to the end of the Chapter I shall then in the next place consider the divisions of your Church which to confess the truth chiefly prevailed with me to quit your Communion Crites This is very strange Mr. Bays for I think that man that leaves the Church of England upon the score of her divisions and then goes over to the Romish Party is guilty of the same piece of wisdom as he that to avoid an Ague leaves the Hundreds in Essex to go into the most unwholsome part of Kent Eugen. Or one that to avoid being Cuckolded removes his Wife from Cheapside into the Pall-Mall or Covent-Garden But prithee proceed little Bays Bays It were an infinite trouble to reckon up all the Sects and Subdivisions into which the Protestant Religion is split a man had better run the Gantlet through a Genealogy Chapter in the Chronicles or what is worse read over one of Ch-sw-lls Weekly Papers that is stuff'd with the Names of the Scotch Lords than be bound to number them And yet they all pretend to be in the right Quote Scripture to support their Cause and damn one another as heartily as ever Interloper did the East-India Company Out of this passage Let every thing be done decently and in order the Established Church has rais'd the whole frame of her Hierarchy her Ceremonies and her Liturgy as you know in the late blessed times the Fanatics out of Curse ye Meroz rais'd several Regiments of Horse and Foot for the Service of the good Old Cause On the other hand because it is elsewhere written that the Christian Devotion is to be perform'd in Spirit and Truth those Adamites in Religion your Dissenting Brethren have stript her stark naked and divested her of all those deceent ceremonies that she used in the Purest and most Primitive times Crites Very smartly argued by my troth Mr. Bays Bays I wont mention ten thousand other particulars wherein you differ for what I have already taken notice of is sufficient for my purpose Now what relief is there to be had in this critical affair how shall the differences be made up between you Or how shall a man be satisfied which Party is in the right and which in the wrong All of them have Texts of Scripture to alledge for themselves as well as you of the Established Church and if you lead 'em a dance amongst the Fathers and appeal to their decision of the matter why they 'll tell you they mind what the Fathers say no more than the Bullies of the other end of the Town mind one of my Lord Mayors Proclamations for living soberly and keeping the Sabbath Alas those Antiquated Gentlemen of the three first Centuries knew little or nothing of the power of the Gospel one honest Presbyterian Weaver wou'd make no more difficulty of bantering a full dozen of 'em if he met 'em in his way than one of your Iniskilling men does of routing a whole Regiment of Irish Poor blind Prelates they had no more interest in Christ than the Laplanders have in the Guinea Company and as for the hidden mysteries of Grace they are as unfit to be consulted as a Physician in a case of Conscience or one of the Judges of the Kings-Bench about the Longitude of the Sea Thus you see Mr. Crites to what a pretty condition you have brought your selves you first of all began the trade of garbling Fathers and Counils and reserving what made for your own interest and advantage and your Brethren since have totally rejected 'em or if they vouchsafe now and then to cite 'em in the Margin which let me tell you is as extraordinary a condescension as it is
you 'l ridicule the regaling one self with the most provoking Meats and the most generous Wines by that name The Poor indeed fast in the literal sense because they can't help it otherwise they might make a shift to relieve nature well enough and with such kind of devout Fasters every Church in the World is sufficiently stock'd and ours amongst the rest for you may find large Herds of 'em every day in the Temple-Walks the Irish Coffee-house or the Piazza's in Covent-Garden Eugen. The truth on 't is Mr. Bays you had done much better to have let this business of fasting and all that alone because amongst Friends be it spoken to charge us with that which you your selves practise with such dexterity of management looks as odd as it wou'd be for a protected Parliament mans man to rail at the priviledges of Alsatia or for one of Pen's Herd to rail at the Five Bishops for not swearing to the present Government or lastly for one of the Heralds at Arms to quarrel with Chaplains and Poets for flattering of Families The other plea about Ceremonies is a thousand times more justifiable and to say the truth is the only proper Objection that a Dramatic Poet can make to the Reformed Religion Bays Well I am glad however that once in my life-time I had the grace to light upon something which is proper as you call it and sutable to the occasion I gad I utterly despair'd of meeting you in so good a humour for hitherto you have us'd me like an Infidel and denied every thing which I propos'd And now Gentlemen let me see how you 'l excuse the Dishabillé of your Church as to the point of Ceremonies You cannot but be sensible how solemn and august the Church of Rome is in her devotion but you I am sure can pretend no such matter Crites Very right Mr. Bays we cannot while the people of your Communion have nothing but Show and Ceremony in their Publick Worship as in the Lives of their Saints they have nothing but sheer Miracle to entertain ' em We have as much Ceremony I 'm sure as decency requires as much as is sufficient to hide the nakedness of Religion and to use any more we think it as great a Solecism as it had been for Adam when he only design'd to cover his Nakedness to have cloath'd himself all over with Leaves like the Green man in the Distillers Coat of Arms. Eugen. 'T is otherwise with you Mr. Bays for you have laid so much Italian Paint upon the Matron that 't is scarce discernable of what complexion she is whether Christian or Pagan We yield to you I confess in the Gayety and Chargeable Dress of Devotion and the reason of it is very plain for it has ever been the Talent of the wicked World to cultivate Superstition with more expence and cost than the Truth it self as you know most of the Limberhams of this end of the Town keep their Misses a great deal finer than their Wives The Religious of the Three First Ages tho it must be acknowledged that out of a Principle of Decency they admitted as much Ceremony as was consistent with the Nature of Christianity yet they never carryed the matter to such extremities as afterwards they were they placed no Sanctity in the observation of them and the ceremonies they retain'd wanted no Theolological Dictionaries or Rationale's to explain them they were obvious to the meanest apprehension and entertained upon solid substantial grounds such as the promotion of piety and the like and not for amusing the ignorance of the people or for advancing the interests of an ambitious Priesthood 'T is indeed very true that every Nation of the World tinctur'd the Christian Religion when it came into their hands more or less with the customs of their own Country This is visible from the conduct of the Graecians who being some of the earliest receivers of Christianity modell'd it in a short time according to their own fancies and inclinations they were a free generous drinking people and accustom'd all along to make much of themselves in their Sacrifices and Libations and so when they made profession of a new Religion which one would have thought might have restrain'd them from sueh extravagancies yet they were resolved to introduce good eating and good drinking into their Churches and so they did till at last their entertainments grew so very scandalous and irregular that they were obliged to lay them aside On the other hand the Italians who had the advantage of recommending their own Scheme of Religion to this part of the Western World by having the Imperial seat in their own Country were naturally inclined to Musick and Painting and all that Pageantry that serves to entertain the senses This sort of divertisement failed not after some time to creep into the Church and as we read the Old Romans used upon some extraordinary occasions to make whole Cities nay Provinces and Countries free of their City so their Successors afterwards out of the same principle of Latitude and Generosity made either all or most of the Old Pagan Ceremonies free of the Christian Religion The Spaniards in their Mosarabic service which still continues in some Churches in Spain made use of Horses and Morris Dancing which as a certain Bishop pleaded for them at the Council of Trent were very significant ceremonies and so without question they were for Horses might be excused out of that Verse in the Psalms where it is said He rides upon the Heavens as it were a Horse And as for Dancing besides that it is sufficiently countenanced from the Levites Dancing before the Ark may very symbolically denote that our souls ought to observe the same agility in the peformance of spiritual Duties as our bodies do in that nimble exercise If the Danes had had the opportunity of prescribing a mode of Worship to the world I make no question but Kettle-Drums had been by this time Iure Divino and used in Churches as well as the Ladies in America keep up the drinking of Chocolate in their Churches a custom which their Priests indulg'd them in long before their conversion and which as Mr. Gage informs us they still continue One that reads in Livie all that foolish superstition that was practis'd in Old Rome and sees the same if not a great deal grosser practis'd in the New would certainly conclude that the Popes had transcrib'd all their Ceremonial out of him so that it had been very well for you Mr. Bays if Gregory the Great could have totally destroy'd that Authors Works as he endeavour'd for then perhaps you had either not practis'd that idle Pageantry which now you do or else you might have passed for the Inventors whereas we now very well know whence you had the Originals In Athenaeus's time the Receipt of making Holy Water was by taking a Fire-brand from the Altar and dipping it into the Water you retain in your Church much
pray take notice of that word for 't is of my own Coining you shall see me prove the infallibility of our Church within the compass of two lines Then granting this Unerring guide we want That such there is you stand oblig'd to grant Pray Gentlemen observe the force of this argument for I protest to you 't is exceeding pretty an Infallible guide is very necessary to direct the Church here upon Earth to set People in the right way and show 'em what is Heresie and what not This I 'm confident no body that has any guts in his brains will deny Now from this very Principium because he 's necessary I conclude I gad that there is such an Infallible guide Crites By your favour Mr. Bays I don't see that this conclusion of yours is very naturally deduced for you know we want ten thousand things in the World which yet are not be had for Love or Money For instance your Seamen that make long Voyages want an unfailing Pilot to conduct 'em to their Port want unfailing Brandy and Bisket and Water to serve 'em all the way want unfailing breezes of Wind to carry 'em thither and home again and yet you will not say Mr. Bays that because they want all these unfailing circumstances that therefore they are possess'd of them I am sure the East-India Company wou'd allow you a better Pension than your late Historiographer Royals place amounted to if you cou'd make your words good And therefore that solid argament in your Canon-Law Si Dominus Deus non fecisset Papam infallibilem Dominus Deus non fuisset discretus Which you Translate he were else wanting to supply our needs Will not pass with me I 'le assure you Bays Mr. Eugenius your friend here begins again to be rude and uncivil he denies plain demonstration and therefore I have done with him But I know you to be of a person of a better temper and so I 'le go on It then remains that only Church can be The Guide that owns unfailing certainty You see I prov'd before that a guide was necessary that therefore we had one Now I' gad by another argument full as invincible I Establish this undeniable truth that the Church which owns such a guide is certainly possess'd of him Crites Of what I prithee Little Bays Bays Why Lord Sir of the Infallible Judge Crites Is it the same thing then to pretend and to have This I confess is a secret that I was never made acquainted with before but now I intend to make the best use on 't I can This is therefore to acquaint all the Goldsmiths Mercers Vintners and Linnen-Drapers in or about the City and lines of Communication that I Crites am infallibly possest of an Estate to the value of ten thousand Pound per Annum somewhere in the North and that whosoever shall presume to deny me credit for two or three thousand Pounds worth of Goods is a rude person and I 'le throw him into Jail for his Pagan Infidelity But Mr. Bays I fancy it wou'd be worth a manswhile to know where this same infallibility resides to have a little conversation with him for I 'de willingly be resolv'd in some such material points as these Whether Mr. Hobbs or Dr. Wallis had the better end of the staff de Quadraturâ Circuli Whether is in the wrong Mr. Flamsted or Captain Blackborough about the Longitude of the Sea Whether a North-East passage is to be found to China Whether it is not rank Non-sence to prove those things which you call unwritten Traditions out of the written word and if so whether Bellarmine does not deserve to be toss'd in a Blanket for citing twenty several places in Scripture to prove a Purgatory by Whether Old Mr. Sclater of Putney's Galatinus was ever Circumcis'd or no and lastly what Dr. Walker meant by his five Theses of Church Government Can you satisfie a friend to this particular Bays What where he Lodges Oh most easily Sir for you may either meet with him at home in Cathedra with a Urinal in one hand and feeling the pulse of Madam Religion with the other or else playing at Shuttle-Cock with his Domestics in the Conclave at Ave-Mary-lane or lastly if it be Term time and a great deal of business stirring abroad at the Sign of a General Council near Westminster-Hall Crites But pray Mr. Bays what is the reason that this same infallibility shifts his Lodgings so often for I am afraid he comes as dissonestly by what he pretends to as the French King by his acquisitions upon the Rhine Methinks now if it had been my good fortune to have stumbled upon this extraordinary prize this Unerring Elixir vitae I shou'd have taken the same Methods that your City-quacks and Captains of Ships and Casters of Nativities use and certify'd the World in Bills Printed for that purpose that I live next door to the Pope's Head over against the Exchange and am to be spoke with at my Lodgings every Morning from Seven till Eleven and in the Afternoon from Two till Six that the poor shou'd have Advice for nothing and that if I had any occasions to stir abroad I wou'd certainly leave word with my Nephew Don Marco Ottoboni what Tavern or Coffee-House I was gone to with this Latin Sentence in the bottom of the Paper Nulla notitia ut experientia But before we part with this Subject one word more and then I have done Suppose Mr Bays any person from the difficulty of finding out this infallible judge shou'd be apt to imagin he 's no where to be met with but in the Isle of Pines or so how wou'd you satisfie him pray Bays Only with half a dozen lines out of my Poem Sir and then let me see whether this scruple wou'd ever offer to stare him in the Face any more The doubtful residence no proof can bring Against the plain existence of the thing Shew him but these lines and the fine simile about Sight that whether it be per emissionem or as some hold per receptionem specierum yet that still no body denys there 's such a thing as Sight show him but these lines I say and if you 'l give me leave to quibble upon my own words I 'le lay ten to one that he presently finds an Emission of his Scruple and the reception of the truth Crites That is as much as to say Mr. Bays because your own Doctors are not yet agreed wherein the substance of the Mass consists for some of 'em place it in the Act of Consecration others make Consecration and Sumption together the Essence of it and some again stand up for Fraction shall a grim Logician thence conclude that your Doctors believe there 's no Sacrifice at all Bays Shall he Mr. Crites shall he Sir No I gad unless he 'l prove himself a Coxcomb for his pains Eugen. But Mr. Bays hold a little I pray I 'de desire you not to lay