may not rush into this Mystery I must be unshod that I may enter in and stand upon holy Ground No man cometh to the Son but whom the Father draweth I may get the notion of something about it but can come to no heart-enjoyment without the Unction of the Spirit of Christ to possess and so to lead me in within the shadow of this Almighty Redeemer 'T is wearisom and barren work to gape towards this Mystery by a meer speculative Search and therefore I would fain make it my design to give away my whole self in every step of this Enquiry to Jesus Christ that I may be taught this mysterious Privilege as the truth is in him whom thus to know is Eternal Life And therefore with a holy fear and tenderness I desire to wade according to the Scriptures into this Deep by the Spirit which searcheth the deep things of God As a foundation for further search How to enjoy Christ actually I find that Christ himself 1 Cor. 3. 11. and a Conscience purged from guilt by means of his death Heb. 9. 14 15. are things enjoyable and so offered and held forth in the Gospel My work in the next place is to enquire how I may actually enjoy an Interest in so high a privilege I am in the first place under a sense of my own necessity to lie down at the Foot of God and suffer Jesus Christ as crucified and risen again to march with all his Train into my heart and take Possession there and then am to suffer his Spirit shutting my eyes and stopping my ears against carnal Reasonings to lead me into a willing Resignation to this crucified and risen Christ my Redeemer which is a spiritual Marriage to his Person A notional Landskip of this state will not serve my turn O thou in whom all the Promises are Yea and Amen renew a right Spirit within me and let my very Soul be moulded into the Truth by every Meditation My Guilt has increased upon me this day I have lost my Thirst after God and do find my strength to waste my Drift is not pure and am carried away into a withered frame and my heart cannot return The sounding of thy Bowels is able to bring me back and enlighten me with the light of Life An impure Eye cannot behold thee nor a surfeited Mind eat of this Manna My Disease is great but there is no healing Medicine to be had but in thee O my Redeemer Wouldst thou in earnest O my Soul be cured and effectually enjoy the Redemption of Christ Then retire thy self only to him and let thy eye be singly fixed there Render up thy Guilt to him who has bought it out of thy hands Withdraw thy sholder from the burthen and with a loathing of thy self and thy sin leave it upon Jesus Christ his Father and thine laid thy Guilt upon him already upon the Cross and when thou dost by Faith lay thy Guilt upon him thou dost not crucifie the Son of God afresh but dost only put to thy Seal that he is the Lamb of God that taketh away the sins of the World He bought thy sins to destroy them he shed his Blood that thy Guilt might be condemned and waits upon thee to bring them forth to him for Execution 'T is not a pain but a pleasure to him that a Sinner delivers up his sins to him because the Vengeance he sustained for sins has fixed a day of Vengeance in his heart against the daily Guilt of his Redeemed and Revenge is sweet Whatever Bryars and Thorns are set before him in Battel he will go through them and burn them together Isa 27. 4. and 63. 5 6. He sustained the Curse satisfied Justice and returned to his Father with the tokens of his Conquest and now attends in the Gospel upon the Elect to cause them to shake themselves from their Dust and bring forth their Dead the Slain of the Lord to the Burial A Sinner then lays his sins on Christ when he believes that God the Father laid them upon him God the Father imposed the burthen and a Sinner by Faith concurs and melteth under the sight of Divine Justice and cries out Even so O Father because it pleased him to bruise him Even so O dear Redeemer because thou lovedst not thy Life to the Death that thou mightest redeem me by thy own Blood I leave my sins upon the Sacrifice of thy Flesh and would crave leave to look upon him whom the Father made an Offering for my sins and whom I have pierced and in the view of this costly Redemption would mourn over him as a Man mourneth for his only Child But yet that I may improve this mysterious Happiness to the more full advantage I would beg help from the Lord to assist me with a true view of the real Existence of those things which relate to Jesus Christ and God's Covenant concerning me and with me in him and what is the mysterious method and power of the actual exercising of Faith thereupon The real Existence of all Gospel-privileges The Gospel is a real thing is witnessed by the Scriptures which do positively attest that those things are so and so as is exprest But such is the cursed Treachery of my heart that the custom of reading and hearing those things makes them seem common and debaseth their Majestick Worth and so beholding them through a literal and common Estimate my eye loseth at once their true colour and certainty which infeebles my Apprehensions as to the lively Belief of their real Existence And in order to the curing of this Disease I am waiting on the God of Light and Truth to breath upon my heart such a quickned frame of Meditation as may humbly and effectually steer my Soul to the Mark which I aim at Unmortified Invention would be busie to hammer out some Answer to my Query but alas 't is a Physician of no value For who can reason a blind Man into the use of his sight He only who brings Life and Immortality to light is able to make the things that appear not to be seen Hast thou not heard O my Soul that thy true and only welfare lies in things which neither the eye of the Body nor the natural eye of the Mind can attain to How self-denyingly then shouldst thou attempt this Search And therefore lest thou catch a shadow instead of substance turn thy self once more by Prayer to him who opens the eyes of the Blind who hath promised he will not give thee a Stone when thou askest Bread for thy necessity And then First Consider To what end dost thou profess that thou believest the Scriptures to be the Word of God unless also thou puttest to thy Seal that it is the very Will and Mind of God exprest in those words of truth Consider also that 2. The most serious discourse of the people of God about spiritual things although their hearts are not under an equal degree of
as the Word of the over-living God saying I would so read the Scriptures or other good Books that in reading I would drink in the matter or things therein presented and have my heart to feed thereon all the while And that we should judge of every part of holy Scripture according to the proportion of Faith and body of Truth And more particularly touching the THREATNINGS we meet with in Scripture we must note they are always to be understood with a secret implied Condition that notwithstanding if we return to God they shall not be inflicted on us But when God swears to his Threatnings there he makes it good as in the Case of the unbelieving Israelites And for Scripture-PROMISES we must not look on any Promise but in and through Christ in whom alone they are Yea and Amen And that we should labour after the believing sight of a Promise which is more worth than all the Gold and Silver in the World And therefore we should catch at the Promises having a Right to them in Christ as a Man swimming lays hold on a thing when he sees himself in danger and bear our selves nakedly on them as a Swimmer upon his Bladders And for this get a through Belief that there is but one God that this God is the same his Covenant the same and ever the same that his words are the same as ever they were in Noah Abraham and David's time putting our selves in their Case As put case I were Noah Abraham Moses c. And we must come up to this Persuasion that God ever abideth faithful and that the Kernel of the Promise both then and now is God's Will in Christ And touching the COMMANDS of the Word we must note That 't is heavy work to eye God's Command only in our Obedience without looking to him for strength for to us under the Gospel God never intended the Commandment any otherwise than as a Rule not as our Strength for Power belongeth unto God he gives Power and Strength to fulfil his own Commands He was a strict Observer of His Observation of the Sabbath the Lord's Day and could not endure either to speak himself or hear spoken by others any thing that tended to withdraw the heart from the Sanctification of that sacred Season and would allow of nothing else to be then said or done but what was of Mercy and meer necessity according to that word in Isa 58. 13. and Lev. 19. 30. Ye shall keep my Sabbaths and reverence my Sanctuary beside the express Injunction in the fourth Commandment He exceedingly loved the Habitation of God's House and the place where his Honour dwelleth He valued the Gospel-Ministry at a mighty rate He esteemed not of Men for Learning and Parts where he saw the Grace of God wanting and that they preached themselves and not Jesus Christ but where both concurred he had always the greatest Reverence and Veneration for them And to prepare himself and Family for the due Celebration of the Sabbath and for the Ordinances of that day he was heard to offer up in Prayer such Petitions as these That God would draw nigh to us in the powerful Working and Operation of his Grace and cause the Dew of Heaven to fall upon us that our Fleece might not be dry that our Witheredness might pass from us That we might have a Verdure a Greenness on our Spirits and be anointed as with fresh Oyl That as he hath presented us to another Sabbath so he would make it a good day to us giving us throughout the day that Thirsting and Hungering to which the Promise is intitled and cause his Omnipotent Arm to bring Salvation and establish it in our hearts granting us the Light of Life and making us so to hear that our Souls might live be made fat with the Fatness of his House and be made to drink of the River of his Pleasures That no Guilt might abide on us but be taken wholly away and our Souls freed from the Captivity of a Fleshly Mind and Will That he would cut those Fetters asunder and work some Renewing upon our hearts some spiritual Strength Warmth and Refreshing That we might have a free Intercourse with him throughout the day praying in Prayer and hear in Hearing and see the Face of God in his Ordinances and they made powerful and transforming That Jesus Christ might come in his Kingly Power in the Ministry of his Word and destroy all the Bonds of the Prince of Darkness That he would not suffer the evil Angels to disquiet and disturb his People in their waiting on him but that they might attend upon the Lord without distraction That in what we do we might honour him who is the Lord of the Sabbath That he in Jesus Christ might be well pleased with us and see and behold his own Working in us and upon us and say It is very good Taht he would grant us a solid Consideration of things spiritual and a higher prospect thereof so as to affect our hearts and that our Scope and Aym in all things might be to please him and profit our own Souls That he would grant us his Presence and Teaching and the Operations of his Spirit in the use of his Word which is spiritual and that our time and life be spent in his fear That our Hopes be upward our Considerations inward and our Converse with spiritual things as those that are above in the Mount with God c. And his manner was in the Evening of the Sabbath after the publick Solemnity was over to repeat himself or by some other in his Family both the Sermons preached on that day with Prayer both before and after the same accompanied with the singing of a Psalm after which he supped and then concluding the day again with solemn Prayer he retired himself to his private Devotion and so went to Rest He had a great Insight into the His Insight into Spiritual and Divine things Mystery of the Gospel and Divine things And this is evident in the several following Discourses in his Letters c. and in such Expressions as these That there is a Tang and Touch of the Gospel which only the Called of God knows And that none can know Christ savingly but those that are united unto him CONCERNING GOD'S UNCHANGEABLENESS That though Man be Changeable yet God stands to his Purpose and Promise appearing Righteous in his Works either in conquering a Sinner by his Justice or overcoming and removing of his Sin through Grace by Faith and so saving the Sinner ordering the very Sin of the Elect to exalt his Mercy Though Sin is not in its own nature but by Accident the cause of glorifying God's Grace And so most justly he punisheth the sinful World for their own Sins and the Sins of the Elect in their Mediator OF GOD'S LOVE AND TENDERNESS to his People That God never comes into any Soul but he leaves a Blessing behind him he pays well for
when he taught his Disciples that Prayer Could I but pray this Prayer in the Latitude of it I should think my foot within the threshold of Heaven The main Gospel-killing work lies The blessedness of a mortified Vnderstanding and mortified Will. in mortifying the Understanding and the Will into the Wisdom and Dominion of the Spirit and in regard my present Controversie is against my own Carnal Will I would deal with that first did not my unmortified Understanding stand in the way My unmortified Understanding can easily dally with all the Notions about the Trinity Law and Gospel Promises and Covenant Faith and every Grace of the Spirit and every Duty of Godliness and yet but trifle all the while The renewed Understanding sucks in the lively Evidence of the Mind of God in all those things and is called the Demonstration of Spirit and Power 1 Cor. 2. 4. and the very Mind of Christ 1 Cor. 2. 16. This Mind of Jesus Christ represents to Faith the infinite God wrapped up in every Particle of his Word and is the Spirit of every revealed Truth Hence comes that Expression You have not so learned Christ Ephes 4. 20. A renewed Understanding is not taught by Words and Sentences be they what they will and though never so good but by the Mind of God and Christ in them Ephes 4. 21. The whole Volumne of the Scriptures is but as it were a small hint of the unmeasurable Will of God And this is the reason why the Scriptures though the words are the same and not altered yet do they by the Spirit speak variety of Instructions in the Unity of the same Truth as the Spirit pleaseth to reveal it self therein which doth not at all argue defect in the Scriptures but infiniteness in the Mind of Christ therein contained This Fulness of the Mind of Christ in the Word is that which makes it divide between the Soul and the Spirit the Joynts and the Marrow and is a Discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart Heb. 4. 12. A renewed Understanding makes use of the Word and all the Expressions therein but as the Door by which to enter into the whole Vision of God in Jesus Christ and the Revelation of his Will and so takes up the Truth truly in the method in which the infinite God is pleased to condescend A renewed Understanding sees the Mystery of Truth to be Substance and Life through that report of it which words do speak It converseth with Life through the Conduit of Words Phrases and Terms It gives way to the Truth as it is in Jesus by believing and not mangle it with carnal Reason and so makes way for the renewed Will to give Obedience by believing doing and suffering the Pleasure and Will of God The renewed Will is one with God's Will in a way of Submission thereto It lies down broken heartedly in the pleasure of God 'T is zealous in Obedience secure in believing quiet in suffering because the Will of God reigneth and cannot be disappointed It makes the Soul in all things give thanks and rejoyce evermore It grieves where the Holy Spirit is grieved and it delights where God delights If God say to Abraham Offer up Isaac he doth it with joy Reluctancy is gone because the Will of God dwells in the renewed Will and the Consultations of Flesh and Blood are mortified It grieves for Sin because it crosseth the revealed Will of God and yet rejoyceth in Hope because all things shall work together for good to them that love him The renewed Will is always renewing it self by Faith in Christ and looking into the Law of Liberty It thanks God heartily for Life Death Health Sickness Success or Disappointment in High Degree or Low Degree because 't is baptized into his Will And that the nature of this new Creation in the Will may provoke my heart to withdraw from the Servitude of my corrupt Will I would ponder the nature of it a little further The first Parent of the Grace of Adoption by Jesus Christ was the good pleasure of the Will of God in his Decree Ephes 1. 5. and actual Conversion by the Word is the Operation also of the Will of God Jam. 1. 18. which bringeth forth a Birth in the new Man of the same likeness Psal 110. 3. Thy people shall be willing in the day of thy power and by this the truth of all Obedience is measured Isa 1. 19. It is also the first thing the Spirit of God hath in its eye and which doth in a way of Acceptation fill up the defect of all other Service 2 Cor. 8. 12. The State of Death in Sin is Captivity to the Will of Satan and the Flesh and Subjection to the Will of God is the First-born from the Dead it first appears and so goes on as the living Token of true Christianity and never ceaseth till 't is filled with the Fulness of God who brought it forth and so it is the undoing Principle to Flesh and Blood and captivates Fear Care and Bondage into the Liberty of Jesus Christ the Eternal Son of God and makes Christ and a Believer no longer twain but one in the Union and Operation of the Spirit whereby the Dominion and sure Protection of God secures the Soul as the Waters cover the Sea Here I stick and here I groan Alas alas for this day of the Lord Oh for this day spring from on high to reveal this light and breath in the Life of this renewed Understanding and Will from the rolling bowels of his own Grace and Spirit I am sick yea I am sick my Pen shakes my heart quivers with desire after this renewing Work Give way O Carnal Mind of Unbelief Darkness Sin and Vanity that my heart may faint away into the bosom of this changing Power of the Spirit of Christ who has redeemed it This glorius Work of renewing The use of the Scriptures the Mind is carried on by the eternal Word of God by which he made the World All Creating Work is effected through the eternal Word the Son of God by the eternal Spirit from the everlasting Father in which God is all in all This eternal Word hath declared himself by a word of Faith Reconciliation and Comfort contained and expressed in a way suitable to the Capacity of Humane Sense Reason and Understanding in the Scriptures that so the incomprehensible Will of God might look into the heart of Man through the inlets of natural Sense and the faculties of a natural Mind making them subservient in this renewing Change Therefore is it made visible to the eye and receivable by the ear retainable by the memory and meditable by the heart in the use of the Scriptures and so doth in a rational way by Reproofs Instructions Convincements and Comforts bring forth the new Creature and hold it in a Spiritual Union and Fellowship with the Father Son and Spirit through a daily Increase tending to the
his Entertainment before he parts And more particularly That if a poor Child should come to his Father and say Father I would not offend you it goes to my very heart when-ever I do offend and grieve you Teach me therefore O my Father so as that I may not offend you in what I do Will not hereupon an indulgent Father compassionate such a Child And hath not God much more pity towards his Children who is the Fountain of Love and Tenderness Of the DIS-RELISH of SPIRITUAL THINGS to a GRACELESS HEART That the things of God and of Soul-Concern are but a dry Morsel to a Carnal heart that such an one may talk of Heaven of the Glory and Happiness thereof and may seem to be somewhat taken therewith but if a good Bargain or some Worldly Profit interpose the heart of such an one is presently taken up and tickled with another kind of delight Also Of the vast difference betwixt a true Christian and one that is not so That a Christian indeed is a strange thing one that outwardly appears to live in the World like others yet there is something within him unseen that is as different from what is in others as Heaven and Earth CONCERNING TRUE FAITH That it is the giving up of our Souls to God in an Act of Reliance on him for himself and those things we desire of him according to his Will that Assurance is rather the Flower or Seal of Faith than Faith properly That Christians are often much mistaken about Faith in taking it for a sure Confidence and Belief that God will help and deliver c. But Faith chiefly consists in a Recumbency and Reliance on God a leaning a rolling upon him to help us or for whatsoever Mercy we desire of him and not that he will help or deliver out of such a particular trouble or to bestow on us such or such a thing we want or remove such an Evil we fear that being rather the Product Effect and Privilege of Faith Many complain they have not Faith when they have no Assurance of God's Performance though they are all the while in the Exercise of Believing and that Faith is the Faith that justifies and true Faith is such as realizeth things absent remote and future That it is not the nearness of a thing makes it real but Faith seeth a thing to be real though afar off when we are apt to judge many times of the reality of things because they are near Also true Faith dwells in a pure Conscience it makes its Nest there it purifies the heart His Faith in God's Covenant His Faith in God's Covenant and Promise and Promise instead of many other Instances appeared in these short Sayings That those who cannot live nakedly upon a Promise in the want of a thing will not know how to use it as they should when they have it and if I were sure to live but one Hour this should be my Exercise The Acting of my Faith upon God's Promises and whilst the Soul is thus in an adventurous Frame this is not Presumption neither cannot be It also exerted it self in Prayer in such Expressions as these That the Lord would arm us by his Fear even with that Fear that is the Concomitant of Love and let them both be united in us for it is one Clause of the New Covenant that he will put his Fear into our hearts that we may fear him and his Goodness and that his Name be great in our Eye that may preserve us from departing from him That the Covenant of his Grace might be a Tree of ripe Fruit to us and that the Hand of Grace might shake it that the Fruit may fall down and we may gather it up for our daily Refreshment Nothing doth more satisfie me in the verity of the Religion I His Argument for the Truth of Christian Religion profess than the Oneness of the hearts of the People of God who all give in the self-same Testimony of the Work of Grace in the heart the same Spirit of Faith breathing in them all His Love to God and Christ was seen in the Course of his His Love to God and Christ Obedience to Divine Commands and his great Submission to all afflictive Dispensations from God Also in his great Love to the People of God in his frequent secret and close Communion with God here and a longing desire to be translated by Death into his immediate Presence and Fruition His Assurance of God's Love His Assurance of the Love of God His Practical Discourses Letters the solemn Covenant he entred into with God and his Dying Speeches do throughout plainly demonstrate And it was greatly promoted and maintained by his often renewing and ratifying of his said solemn Covenant some of which Ratifications annexed thereto are here inserted in his own words as followeth Finding some motion within me urging me seriously to view over this my Covenant and considering it was a most deliberate and voluntary Engagement and that God with whom I have to do remembers it and fails not on his part and that the frame of my heart is so sinfully prone to cast off the Cords of my Duty and so depart from the easie Yoke of Christ and the unspeakable Privileges of my Covenant-Interest in God my Saviour and having I fear sinfully omitted these three Years a through Review of this my Free-Will-Offering I have this Afternoon once more spread it and my Soul with it through the favour of my God before his face and do now again in his Fear and in Reliance on him willingly renew the same and again bind my self to be the Lord's and to be wholly subjected to his Will to own him as my God according to the full scope and purpose of the Covenant before expressed And now O God of all Grace and Glory let this Covenant that thou hast caused and drawn me to renew with thee be confirmed in Heaven and in the heart of thy poor Servant and casting my self upon thee I claim thee to be my God and I give my self to thee and this Evening an Evening greatly to be remembred the 28th of January 1663. I subscribe irrevocably hereunto with my Hand Henry Dorney Vnder much Infirmity yet in some Integrity in my scope and design I have perused over the forementioned Covenant and do own the same and do this day in Reliance on the good hand of my God enter anew into the Bonds thereof as the state of my most happy and most desirable Liberty and Privilege in which I humbly claim God in Christ to be mine and willingly render my self into the hands of his Power and Grace in all things to be his and at his dispose for ever To which I subscribe with my hand this 20th of February 1664. Henry Dorney It having pleased God after many other considerable Changes and various Trials and Exercises in my Life now of late to reduce me from a single to a
spirit and sence of this short word Saved Isa 49. 6. reacheth The meaning of Salvation far even to the ends of the Earth It importeth a state of security from the evil of sin Mat. 1. 21. of Enemies Luk. 1. 71. of Satan 2 Tim. 2. 26. of Hell Wrath Condemnation 1 Thes 1. 10. from the evil of all distress in this life c. Gen. 48. 16. and hereafter 1 Thes 1. 10. It importeth an investiture and possession of all real good in this life and in that to come viz. Conversion Calling Acts 11. 14. 2 Tim. 1. 9. Justification Sanctification Adoption Strength Acceptation with God Blessing Manifestation of God Knowledge of the Truth and every good thing that may tend to enable the heirs of life to dispatch their work quit themselves victorious and lead them at last to their Fathers house Act. 4. 12. 1 Joh. 1. 9. Jer. 31. 9. Jer. 15. 20. 2 Cor. 6. 2. Psal 28. 9. Isa 35. 4. Act. 11. 14. Deut. 33. 29. the walls whereof are God's part thereby for discharging of which he is made a high Priest and so he procures it and maintains it in the power of a King and reveals it as a Prophet all which Offices he was anointed to and qualified for in his own Person And by reason of that Essential Union with the Godhead in which he stood the Father delights in and owns him as Son of Man and doth every way suit with him as the Father of such a Son who is both God and Man The Spirit also which proceedeth from the Father and the Son doth through the same Union of the Divine Essence also suit with him and operate by and through him as the Spirit of him who is both God and Man in one Person Hence ariseth the Perfection and absolute Compleatness of the Mediatorship I am not alone saith Christ but I and the Father that sent me Joh. 8. 16. And the comforting Spirit shall receive of mine and shall shew it unto you Joh. 16. 14. For the fulness of the Godhead dwelleth in him bodily Col. 2. 9. and joyntly and carries on the work of Mediatorship which was personally untertook by the Eternal Son who is made Emanuel And this answers the Question which Philip made Shew us the Father Hast thou not seen me saith Christ He that hath seen me viz. by the eye of Faith as I really am and ought to be looked upon hath seen the Father Joh. 14. 7. Every Action and Revelation of himself is the Revelation of the Father Son and Spirit in the distinguishable working of each Person and yet united in the same God who worketh all in all Christ suffered as the Son of such a Father and the Father in this design of Mediatorship was cloathed with a true Fatherly Relation to the incarnate suffering Son and the Eternal Spirit which proceedeth from the Father and the Son did put forth his Almighty Essential Vertue in the offering up of the Body of Christ upon the Cross Which Union of Father Son and Spirit in God our Saviour Tit. 2. 13. appears in Joh. 17. and Heb. 9. 14. So that all the Persons in the saving of Man doth as it were concenter and work together in the Person of the Mediator The Will of the Father Joh. 4. 34. The Mercy of the Son Heb. 4. 13 14. And the Power of the Spirit Heb. 9. 14. and Rom. 1. 4. All which being one in the Divine Essence of God meet together in the Person of the Son who is according to the Eternal Decree God and Man through his Union with and in the Godhead God thus manifested in the Flesh and as Father Son and Spirit laying the foundation of Mediatorship in Jesus Christ the Eternal Son God and Man doth also in and with him carry it on as a Father to and Spirit of him who is God-man And for this cause the Gospel is called the Word of Truth in respect not only of the Matter of it but the legal Testimony that it receives from these three Witnesses as the Declaration of the Counsel of their own Essential Will and Purpose And in regard the Son of God in the Name and Co-working of Father Son and Spirit undertook the Mediatorship by taking Man's Nature every mortal person that has the nature of Man stands alike near to him in the Dispensation of the Gospel-Call It puts aside other Mediators The Angels are Spirits and have not Humane Nature in which to mediate for Man Christ himself is nearer to us than they are he is Man The Spirits of Just Men made perfect cannot mediate for us for though they are Humane yet they want living Bodies but Christ has his Humane Body with him and therefore is nearer to Men who are cloathed with Flesh Neither can one mortal Man mediate as a Mediator 'twixt God and Man because though he have the Humane Nature in him yet it is in him personally and not representing the whole Race of Man as the pure Nature of Christ the second Adam doth And besides Mortal Man is but Man but Christ is both God and Man that he might lay his hand on both parties God and Man to reconcile them together as they are reconciled in the Person of the Mediator Col. 1. 19 20 21 22. Promises cannot mediate for Man has no right to them but through Christ first Duties cannot mediate because they are loathsome without a foregoing Interest in Christ Graces cannot mediate because they are Fruits of Reconciliation through the Mediator the Fruit cannot be the cause of the Root from whence they come So that as Jesus Christ in being Mediator took our Nature viz. that Humane Nature that is in every person of Mankind into immediate Union with the Godhead dwelling in his Person so this Jesus Christ God and Man in the Relation he bears to the Father and Spirit and they to him in their mutual concurrence in this great work of his Mediation with him having sealed and anointed him thereto that he might compleatly effect it he is the true immediate Object of a Believer's eye and he who renouncing all other names and helps flies thither shall be saved by him Act. 4. 12. He that seeth the Son and believeth on him shall have everlasting life His appearing in the Promises doth make them a Convoy to bring the Soul to him which would otherwise be no better Guides than the Light to a blind Man His presence in Duties makes them the way and door of approach which would otherwise be no better Guides by single gazing on and using of them than a Lanthorn in a Man's hand can be a Guide by gazing on it and leading himself round about in a Circle by the light thereof not minding the way or the door to find which that light was appointed and intended The Graces of his Spirit are the Beams of that Excellency that is in his Person and the Streams which flow from the Fountain which are subject to
depraved heart lies upon me as a lump of Lead I get nothing by talking with it as Solomon saith of the Fool Answer not a fool according to his folly lest thou be like him Prov. 26. 4. for this talking with Guilt and Weakness draweth my Soul which is made free indeed by the Son of God to the likeness of that Guilt and Weakness and my justified Conscience begins again to lick up the old Vomit of Fear and Bondage but my work is then to cast my self by naked Reliance on Jesus Christ who justifieth the Ungodly Rom. 4. 5. as being compassed about with the Guard of God's free everlasting Justification in the Person of Jesus Christ and having the shelter of this Guard then I may return and plead with Guilt and hear the complaints of my heart and the accusations of my Conscience and give them Answers from the fulness of Christ's Atonement and thus again the Fool if such a term may be used in this comparison is answered lest he should be wise in his own conceit Prov. 26. 5. I mean that the Spirit of Bondage which by the advantage of my own sin pleads rationally against my Peace till Faith comes with the Tongue of the Learned and pleads the Mystery of Free Grace against the Plea of Reason and the Righteousness of Christ and his Holiness against Sin and Guilt Nothing prevailed against Sampson till he betrayed the Vow of God that was upon him so nothing can prevail against the Peace of Justification till Guilt divide between the Soul and naked Reliance upon the personal Perfection of Christs Sacrifice and Mediatorship The Soul that lays his Foundation thus will not boast in himself Rom. 3. 27. nor wrong the Visits of God's favourable Countenance by Pride and Wantonness nor yet despair when Storms arise because his foundation is upon a Rock and his safety is not at all any of his own Handy-work As far as he beholds this All-sufficiency of Christ's Mediatorship the eye affects the heart to security and strength and crumbles all Self-sufficiency to powder and blows away the Egyptian Locusts of Guilt and Fears into the Red Sea and restores Pacification and Quiet to the Conscience and from this glorious Sanctuary the Soul comes forth to do the Actions of a new Life by the vertue of another Spirit the Spirit of Love and a sound Mind and worketh the Works of God in the World and takes pleasure in obeying the Truth and if it were possible it would actually keep the whole Law in as much as being now eternally knit to Christ's Person by Faith the Law by the Spirit of Christ is written in the heart This naked Reliance on Christ's Person was the great endeavour and left to us as the experience of the Apostles A Faith of which nature was exercised eminently by the holy Men of old Abraham Rom. 4. 20. David Psal 71. 16. Paul 1 Cor. 2. 2. and Phil. 3. 8 9. There were two foundational Reasons mentioned why the Soul is wholly to cast it self on the naked personal Merit of Jesus Christ viz. because he began our Righteousness and he only perfected the same for ever and those reasons well weighed have great strength and motive-vertue in them to beget Faith and besides 't is commanded as the absolute Condition of Salvation Act. 16. 31. Believe and thou shalt be saved in opposition to which Unbelief is made in the dispensation of the Gospel the reason of dying under the guilt of sin Joh. 8. 24. For the Gospel doth so perfectly hold out Jesus Christ to be the Propitiation for all the sins of the World through the value of his Death and open freeness of the Tender thereof that the very Hinge of Salvation and Damnation is turned upon the Faith of the heart therein or Unbelief thereof as being the most necessary and suitable Requisites for the stating of the Soul into an actual condition of Life or Death eternally Yea Christ pronounceth forgiveness of sins to the Palsie-man Luk. 5. 20. upon the meer Account of Believing And the Apostle Paul declares the Righteousness of God to be upon all that believe without making any difference upon any other respect Rom. 3. 22. This one thing saved the Thief upon the Cross when he had not opportunity to make Satisfaction for all the Wrongs and Robberies he had done This makes the Apostle Paul so laborious to preserve this Mystery from the least mixture of Legal Righteousness Gal. 5. 2. Because a Believer's State and Life is wholly by Grace 1 Cor. 15. 10. which entirely treats with the Faith of a Believer and not with his Works of Righteousness or Sin the one cannot help nor the other hinder because they are as the Elements of another World as they are called Gal. 4. 3. and can neither mend nor hurt that Justification by Jesus Christ revealed from Heaven to a Believer no more than Earthly Food can feed a Spirit or a material Sword wound an Angel And reason is because the Person of Christ is the Ark where Righteousness and Pardon is kept and conveyed singly by the Spirit of Grace to Faith which is the Acceptance of the same and so it is sure from any personal qualifications on Man's part to hinder it where 't is by the Spirit of Believing accepted Rom. 4. 16. This Justification of a sinner by Faith in the Personal Satisfaction and Righteousness of Jesus Christ is that which lays a firm ground for Assurance of Perseverance because the guilt of sin is done away and pardoned at the first believing on Jesus Christ and if they be then done away their guilt cannot really return for the pardon of sins and remembring them no more are joyned together Heb. 8. 12. Neither can sins committed after the Souls Conversion to God by Faith in Jesus Christ hazard the final state of such an one because his person was made accepted at the first closing with Christ by Faith and Pardon of sins is but the Consequent of the Acceptation of his Person Ephes 1. 6. Rev. 1. 5. So that Christ having espoused a sinner to himself by Faith doth wash him from his filth and presents him to himself at length without Spot Ephes 5. 25 26 27. and the person being recieved upon the account of meer Grace sin has no equal Plea against such an one because the strength of his Plea must be by the Law and Grace having supplanted the Accusation of the Law Joh. 1. 17. the Trial depends in another Court where sin is cast out Rom. 6. 17. And if sin could not at first hinder the Acceptation of the person much less can it procure a Dis-acceptation afterwards Rom. 5. 10. And besides the person of every Convert is considered in his true Interest through Grace in the Person of Jesus Christ in whom all Accusations are fully answered Faith having got this Foundation Encouragment and Rightful Interest in the Remission of Sins Righteousness Life and Peace sets it self by
Spiritual Exercise to put the Soul into sure and quiet Possession thereof in a through and direct levelling its eye at the Object the Person of Jesus Christ and to that end it gets the Soul up above the Reasonings of the Old Man Flesh and Blood into the Mount of Gospel-reason and from thence through the Promises and demonstration of the Word of Truth by the Spirit as through a Prospective-Glass gathers into its eye the lovely view of a compleat Redeemer and gazeth upon him till a Dart strike through the Liver and the Soul be made like the Chariots of Aminadab and is both willingly and safely carried into a holy confidence of the truth of what it seeth and the truth of its own being comprehended within the free and liberal reach of the design of God's Free Mercy in a way of particular Application thereof and cryeth out My Lord and my God And O that my Soul were a little upon the wings of the Spirit to ascend by Faith into this Mount of God my Saviour Why abide I among the Folds of corrupt Nature to hear the bleating of my own Confusions and Lusts seeing the Sword of the Lord and his Gideon is drawn for my deliverance Awake O my Heart awake O my Conscience shake thee from thy Dust let the Testimony of Faith and Spirit of Adoption and Freedom lead my Captivity Captive for ever In this glorious Work Faith seizeth on the Soul as the Angel did seize upon Lot and as it were tear him out of Sodom with this blessed advantage that it makes the Soul willing in the day of God's Power to be pulled with violence out of Sodom out of all its fleshly filth and fleshly state it rejoyceth to see the Blood of former Lusts to be sprinkled on all its Raiment 'T is wrathful against the Inchantments of Self-Pride Man's Applause Carnal Reason Earthly Compliances Fleshly Fears and Distrust It roars against its Sensual Mind and Carnal Consultations as a Lyon over its Prey It unhingeth the Gates of its Captivity and carrieth them up to the top of the Mount never to return again Mighty is this Sampson-Faith when its Locks of sanctified Convictions and Manifestation of Grace are grown up to some happy maturity it looks further and further after Christ in every Scripture it rejoyceth exceedingly to find the free Gift of Christ in such Language as this I will give thee for a covenant of the people that thou mayest say to the prisoners Go forth Isa 49. 8 9. Not by works of righteousness which we had done but according to his mercy he saved us Tit. 3. 5. I am he that blotteth out thy sins for my own sake Isa 43. 25. and will not remember them any more But the poor Soul looks down upon the scars of its own vile heart and daily weaknesses and cries out Oh! but what are these Wounds in my heart and hands these thorns in my sides these pricks in my eyes The Understanding triumphing through Faith replies These are the Memorials of the Wounds with which Christ was wounded in the House of his Friends when he came to his own and they received him not and when the Sword of Indignation awoke against the Shepherd one who accounted it no Robbery to be equal with God he then saved the Sheep and after a sore Conflict slew the Wolf and gathered again the Poor of the Flock who were appointed by the Law of Moses to the Slaughter Arise therefore and be not dismayed at the Witnesses of Christ's Agony which dwells for a season in thy mortal Flesh The Battel was his not thine he mortally wounded the Dragon and the God of Peace will shortly tread down Satan and every Spawn of his under your feet These Enemies are left to prove your Faith Integrity and Patience that you might learn Spiritual War and be renowned by Victory through the mighty Spirit of the Captain of your Salvation Then Faith fixeth its eye again upon Jesus Christ through the Word and beholds him as a Lamb that was slain and yet risen and there sees the Grave where the guilt of Conscience was buried and argueth it self into Freedom Guilt is destroyed and none can raise the Dead but God only but God will not raise it up because he destroyed it himself that he might marry the Justified Soul to himself out of that Destruction of Guilt and Bondage in the Person of his own Son that he might thereby bring forth Life and Immortality to sinners 2 Tim. 1. 10. Rom. 5. 6. by Faith and therefore here Faith strives to keep its eye while hands and feet are working and by this Compass it steers its Course towards the Haven of Safety But the abundant Grace and vastness of this Salvation in and through the Person of Jesus Christ is so great that my eye is dazled I am not able to measure the Heavens I bring my Bucket to hold the Sea and 't is drowned in the great Waters And yet here Faith has a Refuge against Confusion of Mind viz. when it espies a passive sence in all the Justification and Acceptation of the Gospel and in all the Fruits thereof working me up to and making me to be content with a Conformity according to the Measure given me by Jesus Christ Hence are the words discovering it rendred in a passive sense Justified Redeemed and Saved and the Action of this is ascribed only to Christ or God in Christ who justifieth redeemeth and saveth And hence also Faith giveth the Soul Relief against Confusion of Mind about defect of knowledge by the thought of this that though I know little yet I am known perfectly of God Gal. 4. 9. and though I apprehend little of the great Mystery of this Salvation yet I am apprehended fully by Jesus Christ Phil. 3. 12. while I receive him by Faith and am willing to be comprehended and moulded by his Spirit It was but a small thing on Mans part to touch the Hem of Christ's Garment yet that being an Act of Reliance on Christ and subjecting the Soul to him presently there came in Health of Body and Pardon of Sins from that comprehending Relation in which Christ stood to such a Soul The Souls work in Faith or rather that to which the Soul is wrought is a contentedness to receive the Person of Christ by Faith as the Sum and Title of its Interest in more than it can be ever able to receive within its own capacity The Soul that receives the Person of Christ by one true closing hint through Faith receives a rightful Propriety to every Excellency and Perfection that is in God laid up in Christ for that end though the length of that Perfection and Blessing be never fully known As a Man who buyes a Field if no Exception in the Laws of that Nation be made he buyes all the Advantages of that piece of Earth downwards to the very Centre of the Earth and all between that and the Stars albeit
spiritual Warmth do attest those things are really true The more spiritually any thing is preached or spoken it gives the more relishable taste to their inward Man and though they are of divers Nations yet they accord in the same main Principles of the new Creature and the same substantial inward exercise of heart 3. Observe also with what Radical Uniformity the Opposers of Grace do resist the Convictions of his Spirit And besides 4. Doth not thy truest Rest lie in thy nearest Approaches to God in Christ as thy Centre towards which thou art restlesly rowling as the true and real bottom of all thy hope and comfort But wouldst thou indeed know that the matters contained in the Word of Christ are real things Then never read or hear for meer knowledge sake Look for some Beams of Christ's Glory and Power in every Verse Account nothing Knowledge but as it is seasoned with some Revelation of the glorious Presence of Christ and his quickning Spirit Use no Conference about spiritual Truths for Conference sake but still mind the promoting of something for real Edification Use not Duties for Custom and meer Service sake but for Approach and nearer Communion with God Make no person thy Pattern more nor less than as some warmth of the Presence of Christ appears in his Words Walk and Conversation Let thy Recreation be Prayer suffer not Guilt to wranckle wash often in the Blood of Christ do not slightly grieve the Spirit but pray for the fulfilling of the Promise that the Spirit shall teach you all things Let nothing bar up your way from craving pardon of sin and hope of relief And if you thus trade in spiritual things as real they will appear more and more to be real according to the Promise Joh. 7. 17. If any man do his will he shall know c. But alas while I would thus muse my heart into some spiritual Freedom and Activity I am again dismally invaded my filthy and vile heart rebels the Prince of Darkness hath violently broke in upon me my Conscience is defiled and my Peace wounded my Prayers are heartless I have turned my self round into a Giddiness I have lost my Station and am bleating up and down like a Lamb in a large place I got a glimpse of Relief but cannot fix my eye upon it But what gain I by solitary Complaint I have sinned in the sight of God Angels and Men in the sight of my Redeemer in the sight of my own Conscience and Oh that I could pour out my Soul as Water before the Lord It would be a rich Mercy to me to be admitted to tumble at the feet of my Judge and get so near as Mary did to wash his feet with Tears and wipe them with the Hairs of perpetual Resignation to himself and to his disposal of me to purge me in what method soever so I may be clean and the seven Abominations of my heart cast out I would fain say in faith I will yet look to thy holy Temple Blessed be the name of him who is strong merciful gracious and abundant in Pardon Blessed be that God that Redeemer the Lord although unworthy sinful Wretch that I am yet my Righteousness O that God would yet spirit me to enquire into and taste the Bread which came down from Heaven I am searching after the real Existence of Christ and the benefit which flows from Union with him And I perceive that my peculiar Happiness lies not in this that these things have real Existence in themselves but that I know them to exist and my self to exist in them and they in me The things themselves are spiritual I cannot know them naturally but by the Spirit of Faith for Flesh cannot see Spirit In the Mount will the Lord be seen As far as God shines upon my heart and Ordinances so far I behold a real worth and glorious power in them In his light only I see light Psal 36. 9. As far as Grace gets life in my Soul so far I see the real Excellency of it As the Life of God opens it self to my heart so far I live and know the ravishing comfort of spiritual Life for with him is the Fountain of Life when he withdraws his Breath I do as it were return to the Dust for in him I live and move I know no worth in any Christian but as I partake with him in the same Spirit and Life Divine Commands Reproofs and Comforts do so far affect my heart powerfully as my Soul doth live in him who speaketh them The demonstration of spiritual things doth so far appear convincing as my heart is really transformed by them into the Image of Jesus Christ my Lord and my Head Though I have a renewed Principle of Light and Sight yet I cannot exercise the Sense of spiritual Sight till the Son of Righteousness sends forth a Beam to me by which I may behold in the Reflection of his own Light And this binds over my Soul to a necessity of a mortified believing Resignation to the Author of all Light Sight and Strength who is an unchangeable Rock and his work is perfect although I am full of Changes yet this Covenant keeps me from utter falling my strength and sight is ever decaying but he renews his Loving-kindness every Morning O let the day hasten in which I may know as I am known and the shadows of darkness and infirmity slee away I might come to a more real view of Jesus Christ and appropriate him and his benefits nearer to my heart if I had practically learnt the Exercise of Faith God has allowed a venturing boldness to Believing that it may step forth and stand in the breach when all seems to be lost When Lot is taken and Ziglag burnt and all carried away Captive then can Faith turn the day and recover the Spoil Faith is a distinct Grace wrought Faith only brings the heart to Christ freely by the holy Spirit quickning the heart to assent to and rest upon the Word of God upon the account of the Truth of God who spoke it 'T is distinct as Seeing and Hearing is distinct from other Senses 'T is wrought freely by the Spirit and so no acquired Notion it quickens through conveying Life from Christ to the heart by Divine Appointment It assents to and rests upon the Word against the Contradiction of Flesh and Blood It eyes the Truth of God as the Fountain of its Satisfaction and Success And so it first unites the heart to Christ and gives actual Propriety in him and in the Covenant which God made with him before the World was and consequently to all the Blessings contained in the Covenant 2 Tim. 1. 9. Ephes 1. 3 4. As the Gospel offers Christ Pardon and Life so Faith takes it freely not measuring the Ground of accepting it from below but from above It sees the Word to be the breathing of God in Jesus Christ in which all his Attributes are
working and beholds it as it were the audible Voice of God and the very Mind of Christ It cannot be satisfied in the weakness of the Letter but passeth through the Letter immediately to the Person of Jesus Christ and converseth with God in him The whole Scriptures in the eye of Faith is as a pair of Spectacles through which Faith gets the sight and closeth with the Promise It magnifies the Scriptures Ordinances and Sabbaths as they are the Portal through which to enter into Communion and Converse with God himself It believes the Scriptures that makes Report of the Will and Pleasure of God and so passeth through them to the Will Mind and Name of God himself Faith visits as a faithful Guide in its Journey and useth it no farther than a means tending to bring the Soul and God together The Word reports that Christ is there his Life his Strength his Grace is there and requires the Soul to enter in and take it Faith enters in finds and receives it Faith having found its Object and espying the way how to come at it is quickned by the Spirit in pure Obedience to God's Command to attempt some holy Adventures upon the Word and passeth by all Considerations of Flesh and Blood as deaf and blind to all things but what the Word speaketh 't is resolved to take as it were a senceless Journey to Christ even upon the Sea for 't is contented to feel no Ground but the Promise It stays not to enquire whether it hath strength enough to walk or no but looks on the Word of Truth and considers its need and so ventures and by venturing engageth all the Attributes of Jehovah Father Son and Spirit for its relief If I perish I perish The faithful and true Witness hath said Fear not only believe Faith so far as it works doth Faith doth both possess the Vnderstanding Judgment and Will and puts them to exercise persuade the heart of the Truth Power Wisdom and Goodness of God that speaketh and of the true performance of the thing spoken and is singly of it self through the overshadowing of the holy Spirit a principle of appropriating to the heart the Truths spoken from the Mouth of an infinitely true holy and wise God in his Word and so fixeth a blessed Satisfaction in the heart through the real Existence of the things spoken and apprehended by the renewed Understanding so far at least as they are by an actual Exercise of Faith apprehended Luk. 1. 45. Blessed is she who believed for there shall be a performance of the things told her from the Lord. The Understanding being renewed The Vnderstanding exercised views over the Covenant as it was made with Christ before all time Tit. 1. 2. and considers what method God has used to manifest it in the World He created the habitable World and made Man at first righteous and then permitted him to fall into the Breach of the first Covenant viz. of Works whereby he gave entrance and footing to the second Covenant viz. of Grace Gen. 3. 15. and carried it along in a holy Line through the corrupt Race of Mankind before the Flood he then sweeps away the ungodly World and preserves the Covenant-line in Noah and from him carries it on to Abraham and kept it on in its course amidst much Prophaneness and Idolatry that was in the World He then renewed it more distinctly with Abraham and gave it a more visible Being than ever before that time and by reason thereof called Abraham the Father of the Faithful He confirmed it also to Isaac and Jacob who are oftentimes mentioned in the Scriptures as the three grand Witnesses of this Covenant-favour From thence it descended to the twelve Tribes representing the elect visible Church After which it was brought forth in a Typical Demonstration of Christ and his managing of all things needful to make that Covenant applicable which is carried on under the shadows of the Ceremonial Law The Prophets succeed asserting this Covenant of Grace and expounding it At last Christ comes in Flesh and seals it with his Blood and the Apostles are sent sorth to discover and preach this eternal Purpose of Grace to the wide World for calling in the Elect. So that the Covenant of Grace which was made of God in Christ before the Creation of the World appears as the main scope of the Scriptures and issues forth its vertue through all the Promises Fatherly Commands Reproofs Consolations and the Deliverances which are recorded in Scripture as the various Streams Operations Experiences and Effects of the Covenant of Grace in and towards the Heirs of Life It bears the Name of the Old Covenant during the time while the Passover was in use and after the Lord's Supper was instituted it was called the New Covenant both Old and New are one Covenant of Grace differing from the Covenant of Works as far as Grace and Works do differ The Understanding having perused The exercised Judgment the Scriptures and so made its view and deliberated the matter digesting it by Meditation and Prayer the Judgment resolves to make Covenant-refuge its Sanctuary and thereupon forbids the heart to admit the Contradiction of Flesh and Blood and the reasoning of Carnal Wisdom and Observation resolves to determine nothing according to the Flesh endeavours to shut up all passages by which Unbelief carnal Mis-construction and fear were wont to enter and labours to keep open every Port that may admit the naked recourse of the Spirit in the Word and opens the Windows of the Soul to take in the Testimony and Evidence of a faithful and merciful God only And when this mighty Discovery and Conquest is made the foundations of Bondage Terror and Tyranny which before tormented the Conscience and enslaved the heart doth now begin to totter The Understanding and Judgment The Will assents having gone thus far in the Conduct of the Spirit do attempt effectually the persuading of the Will to accept a new Lord viz. the Messenger and Prince of the Covenant him in whom all the Promises are Yea and Amen Sanctified Conviction begins to sway the Will as Nathaniel was moved by Philip to come and see him of whom Moses and the Prophets did write and assuies the Conscience that God is ever mindful of his Covenant has sealed it with the Blood of his own Son and has sworn that it shall stand sure as the Ordinances of Heaven and that no particle of it shall ever fail to which the Will assents But alas how doth my Pen as it were gash my own Soul in writing what I cannot heartily and at full liberty put in practice Oh that my Understanding and Judgment had thus far in a powerful Gale of the Spirit led my Soul forth to the Gates of Freedom and thus far brought me within the Bond of the Covenant How soon would the same mighty Power conquer over my Will to a holy Security and Rest in believing I
of Body or Mind as are suitable to such work 3. Let not the Thoughts be inrodinately devoured in it and to that end 4. Force the heart to read and meditate the Scriptures with more seriousness and labour for an inward value thereof above any other labour or study 5. Judge not any useful Labour Work or Study to be materially evil because your inordinate Affection about it is sinful but rather regulate your desires to Moderation and a right end in what you do 6. Be contented in the measure of your Attainment 7. View the excellency of God in Christ appearing in all created Skill Excellency and Worth Strive to wind up your heart by Creature-Excellencies instantly to a more actual Enjoyment of them as his Gift only and so to himself as the Fountain of Perfection Thus have I been wrestling with a Monster bred in my own Bowels but O Captain of my Salvation breath Truth Faith Vertue and Blessing upon these Meditations or else all my labour is lost and my enquiry into my disease spent in vain Every good and perfect Gift comes down from above and therefore my eyes are to the Hills from whence comes my help Let not the Poor return ashamed of his Hope I leave my Success upon thy hands who hast redeemed me O Lord God of Truth And seeing a gracious God hath favoured me thus far to drill me along sometimes wooing sometimes reproving sometimes comforting and confirming me in the various roulings of my heart in these Meditations from time to time I would now lean upon him to make good all the movings of his Spirit in my heart and issue forth from himself through Christ by his Spirit a suitable Supply according as my daily need and proneness to decay doth require that it may be evidenced to my Soul that these Meditations how much frailty soever I have been laden with under them were not meer Humane Labour and Invention but that the Breath of the Holy Spirit hath been in some true measure present And therefore O thou who art the God of all my Hope be pleased to cause all that love to and desire after pure Union and Fellowship with thee in Christ which hath been at any time working towards thee in any of these Meditations and at any other time to be purged from my personal Guilt that cleaves to the best thing which I do And vouchsafe a Return of my desires from the Throne of Grace as far as any exercise of Spirit in me hath been acceptable in thy sight through my dear Redeemer That whether I sleep or wake the groanings of thy Spirit may be acceptable before thee day and night and though my heart be vile yet let it still be as a Garden watered by thy hand a Soul which the Lord careth for Bring me through the great Waters that one day I may be utterly and eternally delivered from every evil work inward and outward and purely serve love and glorifie thee being presented spotless through Christ among that glorious Host of the Spirits of just Men made perfect LETTERS 1638. To D. B. N o 1. YOur Letter I very gladly received and 't is no small delight to me to see that your eyes are towards Heaven and your desires to the fear of your Maker Before I was hopeful but now I am confident And being the beautiful Light of the Gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ hath enlightned your Soul and purified your Conscience from dead works to serve the living God seeing 't is thus fear not only be strong Be thrifty of your time exact in your course spiritual in your aim bearing about an undaunted Triumph in believing One thing among the rest not unneedful I must advise you that you set your self to pluck up your Spirits and be of a lively heart getting what necessary insight into the World you can that you may the better get within the humours of all people to understand the better how to carry your self in what condition of life soever you shall be in to your own comfort and the shunning of unnecessary Reproach or Contempt but contrarily Credit and Esteem of all even of them that are without The Exercise of Worldly Wisdom Policy Skill and utmost Endeavour must be used albeit not depended on nor the Corruptions of the World practised Something I do the rather write this way as conceiving some other Course of Life will befall you ere long than at present you are in yet still keep close to Almighty God and whereas others in their Course on Earth and creditable Conversation here do sacrifice to their Wits Boldness Contrivance and the like do you endeavour and pray that you may sacrifice to the Will Wisdom and Assistance of God in Heaven made over to you in the Merits of Christ undoubtedly The Lord be with us and grant us unearthly Hearts and Conversations whatever may hereafter betide us There is no Rock like our Rock no God like our God to him I commit my self and you for an everlasting Support 1639. To D. B. N o 2. HAving such an opportunity I could not but write you a few Lines and all that I have to say is Cast your self upon God in Jesus Christ Eat his Flesh and drink his Bloud Be with him upon the Cross be with him ascended into Heaven by the one to be discharged from the Clamours of the Law and the Guiltiness of Conscience by the other to triumph in Assurance of Victory over Sin and Sorrow This Implanting into the Son is by Faith this Life of Faith is fed by Meditation of the Mystery with Prayer and attentive Reading and Hearing with good Conference with experienced Believers and Use of the Sacraments These things I believe your heart doth ponder but we are bound to put one another in mind And next seek and strive in your Service to be laborious faithful discreet separate not the Service of Christ from the Service of your Master serve one in the other strive mightily to temper them well one with the other and then what you put your hand unto do it with all your might c. 1646. To B. J. D N o 3. I Know you are under great Suffering and what word of Comfort or Counsel to write to you I know not only this that it is of the Lord as Jonah was not to be angry you are not to be tortured with Grief That one that two Gourds are withered together Morality and Reason do plead for Patience and Content but your interest in the Maker and Heir of all things may truly argue it much more He that gave you them at first has now called them away The Giver lives though the Gift be withdrawn The Comforter is the same and the substance though the Comfort be removed and the Leaves fallen Haply your thoughts are Where are they Whither gone At rest or not Consider whose eye saw them before they were formed in the Womb the everlasting Decree had disposed of them
Faith only should take up viz. Reconcilement upon free Terms If there be any Sinfulness or any Aggravation of Sin which seems to except it self from the Remedy of Christ's Atonement then certainly the Eye of Faith takes not up its Mark as it should do If there be any Weakness and Darkness and the Soul think to get over it without a humble Resignation of the Case to Christ for help it will find the Cure come badly on A heart which would not have a liberty for sinning can never engage in a free-hearted Adventure on Christ too far for Pardon and Strength Christ never refused any one Sinner that came to him on Earth unless it were the mocking treacherous and spightful Pharisees and therefore I am bound to believe he hears and accepts every unfeigned Request though hardness and darkness do afflict So that I am with my lamenting after him to rejoyce also that he is himself the Corner-stone of that work in my heart that yearns after him in a dry Land I recommend you to the Lord and rest c. 1655. To A. C. N o 22. I Thought good to send you a few Lines which while I am writing serves instead of a Conference there only wants your Answer to every Sentence and the mutual refreshing of your Voice I can at a distance guess at your thoughts I can also take Refreshment in this that the Arm of the Lord seen by you or unseen yet it holds you teacheth you and is always near you We may not think the unchangeable God doth change as oft as we use to change Not every Cloud nor all the Clouds of the Sky are able to hinder the Course of the Sun because the Sun is above them and so is the Covenant of our Peace above our Darkness and Weakness A small matter if Seasons of Weakness and Dulness may be called so is enough when Unbelief is cherished to make as much mischief in the Soul as a Woolf among a Flock of Sheep Indeed every Sin is hateful in the sight of God and a sluggish heart that is rather prone continually to all that is evil inwardly and outwardly than inclined to good is grievous to the Spirit of God But this is perpetually the Refuge that God accounts the Sinfulness of his People their Sickness not their State and to purge and cure them he useth sometimes one Means and sometimes another witness Psal 89. 31 32 33 34. and Isa 27. 8 9. But still the Covenant being wholly of his Contrivement stands fixed in Heaven and Jesus Christ who has both your Nature as much as if your self were there and God's Nature too in one Person to preserve that Covenant in your stead for your good There is no creature-goodness of any sort soever that prefers any person to have an Interest in that Covenant because he sheweth Mercy to whom he will And there is nothing essentially needful to give any one a Right to apply this Covenant but a sense of necessity and a willingness to accept it and be saved by it only As wicked people fancy the way to Heaven so as that they think they can obtain it and yet desire still to keep their sins in their Bosoms and cannot hear of parting with them so many gracious people though beloved of God cannot imagine that Eternal Life being a Blessing of that greatness can be got so easie as by believing only Or if they grant it is to be had only by Believing yet they do so much look upon personal Qualifications by which to try their Faith that unless it be to such and such a degree they think they have not Faith And when they have got the degree they desire they are as much to seek as before And all is because God has left no such Qualifications as things that shall give rest to the Soul for they are but the Garments of Faith That Soul that is willing Christ should both save him and purge him shall be saved and purged and God cannot but account him clean from condemning Guilt I hope you live in the Study and Consolation of these glad Tidings of Gospel-Peace I trust also that God has and doth sanctifie all his Dispensations to your heart that you may be chearful in believing and fruitful in Holiness as one who is taught of the Lord and thus commending you to the Lord your Rock I rest yours in Truth and Love c. 1655. To B. D. N o 23. I Hear that the same hand of a good God that carried you forth hath brought you home to visit the Habitations of some Friends and view the Monuments of others deceased amongst which our Parents and Sister and Grandmother of refreshful Memory How God has dealt with you in that Wilderness of Pits and Snares from whence you came I know not but I hope the Prayers of those deceased in the hand of a living Christ are at this Hour pleading for you The God of all Power preach Freedom of Resignment unto him into your heart I wish there may be more of pure Communion with God in your heart than my feeble Soul can reach unto 'T is rich Bounty from God if I have never so little truth of desire towards him But I may mourn out all my moisture that my hard heart cannot come fully away to him Oh for a broken believing heart the Merchandize thereof is better than the Merchandize of Silver c. Such as have listed themselves into that spiritual Warfare there is no fear of miscarrying while they keep to their Colours and are given up to the Lamb's Conduct 1655. To C. A. D. N o 24. YOurs of the 25th of September last I received and do thank you for your Christian Love and Tenderness therein exprest and for the Heads of that searching refreshing Sermon for indeed nothing can be refreshing but what is searching and convincing The Vertue and the Excellency of Gospel-Remedies can never be welcome nor do their work till they be permitted to search and overcome that Truth may break forth to Victory and there may be healing without Putrefaction at the bottom And when a poor Soul cannot order his own Distempers yet then to consent to and approve of the Soveraignty of the Medicine and Skill of the Physician Could I come up to that Truth Faith and Resignment I should then more magnifie that Grace and be more fruitfully refreshed in the Salvation of God There is a pure Releif in the Gospel conveyable only by the Arm the Spirit of the Lord but it is oftentimes in a great measure spoiled and defiled in a carnal way of Endeavour to receive it To entertain spiritual Truths in the Spirit and to be subjected to their Law and formed over into their Mould Complexion and Constitution this I think were Religion indeed For my own part I view these things at such a distance that sometimes I even doubt whether there be any more than Notion left or if more what it is that
You are a Traveller and shall pass from strength to strength till you appear before God in Sion I perceive you have thoughts about some alteration of your Condition and Oh that the same Guide which directed Abraham's Servant in the behalf of Isaac may go before you I should rejoyce more that you were yoaked with a gracious Mate than with the richest Estate in Britain where the Pearl of Grace is wanting I desire to remember you before the Lord. Be much in Prayer as I doubt not but you are and live above your self and above the World in that Transaction Grace and Wisdom and a Religious Stock are excellent Jewels though cloathed in a mean Dress Prov. 31. I say no more but the Lord who is your Refuge be your Counsellor And as you mind me of our spiritual Bond so I desire still to be mindful of it and that we both may incessantly pray for each other Remember me to Brother Daniel in the Bowels of Jesus Christ Let him and you comfort and strengthen one another in the Lord to whom I commend you remaining yours on the best account c. 1657. To D. H. N o 30. COuld I be more in the Spirit I could then write with more freedom but this I know that if I and you have our faces towarn Sion we shall be brought thither at length Our great work is to cease from our selves that the Spirit of Jesus Christ our Lord might have liberty to work in us and for us I know no such Door to the Mediator as to be resigned over to him and to be yielded up to the Salvation and Power of Free Grace 't is the only wholsome Food and Physick of a Sinner When the Soul is widened by Resignation to him and Self-abhorrency then his naked Redemption is sweet welcome and a Soul-satisfying Remedy I oft see a glimmering of this but my eye is weak yet such glimmerings tell me that there and there only lies the First-fruits and hope of Glory I had rather see God do a little in me and for me than do much my self for God's Little is infinite and my Much is nothing in his sight for me to be accepted thereby Therefore is Faith the only Key of all spiritual Treasure which is hid in Christ and in him only And by this going out of our selves to him we are made his and himself and his Treasures of Pardon Righteousness Wisdom and Perfection is made ours Venture your Prayers upon him though they seem to be cast away after many days they will return You can hardly find that ever Christ reproved his Disciples for any thing but Unbelief or little Faith or for not suffering Infants or others to come to him Let all these things teach you and I what is our chief Duty I leave you to the Lord remaining yours in truth and love c. 1658. To B. D. N o 31. YOur two last Letters have much refreshed me because I perceive it is not the Complement of Invention but the heart-raising Spirit of God has been favourable to you Be craving still be thankful still believe through the Clouds God has thus appeared that he may teach you how to live on him when he appears less to Sense you are Heir always to the same Joy and infinitely more when under the saddest hours Expect Trials for every Grace especially for Faith Winter follows Summer but the end will be Victory and Peace of which you have had I perceive a Taste Covet Christ's Image insatiably and to be at his dispose universally and let us bless his Name night and day I want a heart to bless God enough for his goodness to us the day hastens in which it will be done perfectly I am in health of Body labouring under the shameful load of an evil heart yet in hope of Victory through him who liveth for ever to make Intercession for them who desire to come to God through him only Amongst all business publick or private it is good for you and I to be watchful to keep a constant motion upwards constant Tenderness is a rich Treasury Grace is that incomparable Endowment enough to put a lustre upon every other Requisite What Alliance is greater than to be allied in the Communion of the Spirit I perceive God hath favoured you with an Affliction I hope you shall not go without the Blessing of it Be more importunate for a Blessing than anxious about the Loss or troubling your thoughts about Persons or Instruments or about future Events but commit your self and Estate Body and Soul to God as unto a faithful Creator and rejoyce in the hope of a better Resurrection and groan for nothing but the Body of Sin till it is groaned out of doors 1658. To S. D. H. N o 32. I Am glad to see you strive to get up the Hill and do take the right way Go on and prosper he is near who justifieth you Though he stands as it were behind the Wall he hears your Request and all your desire is before him he himself has undertook the whole Light is sown for you the Harvest is coming Lift up your Head your Redemption is sure and your Waters shall not fail You can never lay too much burthen on Christ he bears up the Pillars of the Earth and has already born your burthen the work is over with him and shall be over with you too shortly Yet a little while and he that shall come will come and will not tarry You are not your own Workmanship but his he has lifted up his hand to Heaven and sworn that Blessing he will bless you and shortly tread Satan and every Corruption under your feet Cling about him he will not shake you off your Prayers are heard your Person is accepted Be not weary everlasting Arms are under you the Battel you are in will prosper The greatness of his Power is not to amaze you but to support you his Righteousness is to justifie you that you may not fear your Judge but reverence and love him who has washed you in his own blood and the business is done already and now there is no revoking of it The more difficulties do appear the more you are to triumph in him who overcame by the Blood of his Cross and will not leave you shelterless he can teach you better than I I leave you to him I perceive by your Letter that my dear friend R. M. is dead or rather now I confidently believe perfectly alive beyond Sin and Toil. I know you are not wanting towards that poor Child take her to Heaven as much as you can along with you Let us pray one for another and we shall not seek that blessed face of his in vain I might write much of mine own leanness and unworthiness and I would I could be more sensible of it so as to lay my starved Limbs on that free heart-reviving heart-renewing Covenant of Grace confirmed in the Person of a crucified and risen
be so When he says Sin shall not have Dominion over you I will circumcise your hearts to love me I will redeem Jacob out of all his trouble I will be with you and deliver you his words are all true but our little exercise of Faith is either like a weak handed Gripe or a leaky Vessel yet our Faith it self is in his keeping and his Intercession is incessant and therefore it cannot utterly fail Dear Sister wait on him pluck up your Soul to the business your labour will not be in vain nor any unfaigned desire after him return disappointed and ashamed Throw Husband Child and self upon him into his Bosom and there lodge together by Faith in the Joy of the Holy Ghost and so take your rest I mean a laborious and yet a sweet Rest for He gives his Beloved Sleep His own Concernments are mixt in ours though his own are chief in his eye yet he can look upon them without beholding ours for the Covenant is made and the Blood that concerns it is already shed and fully accepted the Redemption compleat and the Lord's portion and delight is his People So that he as it were if I may say as it were in so true and real a business raiseth in himself an endless delight by loving his ransomed Seed and in dressing them according to his own heart and shedding out a measure of that Love into their hearts also for carrying on a Spirit of Conjugal Affection in the Souls of his People towards him now till the shadows slee away and we come to know him as we are known of him and so love him without interruption as we are loved of him Is the day near when a thousand fold more of this will really appear than words can utter For who can speak how much there lies in God's Purpose yea in his very heart to do for them for whom he died bought so dear and rescued with so high a hand Deut. 10. 15. How then should we look out to awaken our faith and lift up our heads because our Redeemer is alive and risen and our safety is in him Oh that my own heart and yours were more warmed in such a view I have no more but to recommend you to the Bosom of him who is the God of all Grace Pity Power and Consolation Yours in the hope of this saving Health and Relief c. 1663. To E. D. N o 70. I Received your Letter though not so well spelled as that I received before but as bad as it was a Father can pick out the meaning of his Child for Love is quick-sighted and the best Interpreter of words in the World God is so to me and teacheth me the same to you You wrote you would fain have a tender heart such as the Prophet calls a heart of Flesh but not a fleshly carnal heart What then must become of the hard heart Your earthly Father cannot take that away nor give you the other but beg of him who made the Promise and he can and will both give you the one and do the other also Be not a stranger to him I would part with some of your Affection towards me as far as he allows me that you might spend it on him You cannot speak to me but by a Letter at this distance but you may to God all hours of the day and night Read the Scriptures as the Word of him who deserves all your love and desire I am contented to have it only at the second hand Muse over as oft as you can by what you read and hear how sinful your Nature is and loathsome in God's eye and how wondrous his Goodness is to tell you he lays that loathsomness of yours on Christ and he has by his death brought in eternal Redemption for you Consider his exceeding love and the great travel of his Soul and bitter Agony that you in prizing and flying to him may be freed from the dreadful state of a hard and polluted heart you cannot ask any thing of him to this end only do it reverently and with reliance on him but he is as willing to give it You may open all your heat to him yea you must do it for he loves to have you do it that so your whole heart may be cured and my Child be found at last among the number of them who sing for ever Blessing and Honour Glory and Thanks to him who loved us and washed us from our Sins in his own Blood I leave you to his care c. 1663. To D. H. N o 71. I Have not yet found out a way of Employment but am looking out and do desire to be looking up for my advice and help comes from the Hills as David speaks Disappointments as a wise and faithful God orders them are as useful many times as Success God has not cast me out of his gracious Covenant nor my Soul into murmuring discouragement but tells me the Trial of my Faith is better much better than Gold However 't is with my outward Man yet my chiefest Want is not there and although my sinful and corrupt heart wars strongly against the Spirit and the new Creature yet I believe the Spirit in the Operations of his Grace in the new Creature will carry the day when all is done for our Redeemer is strong I am laden with Darkness Weakness corrupt Lusts Vanity Distrust unsteady and uneven Walking deadness and hardness of heart but I find the Fountain of Mercy for cleansing still open and the Grace Mercy and Truth of God in the Covenant unchangeable and in this stands all my Salvation all my chiefest desire 1 Sam. 23. 5. I want nothing but more Faith more spiritual Light and Furniture more of Christ's Image more renewing in the Spirit of my Mind to have less carnal Carefulness Luk. 12. 22. and more of the just Man's Life Hab. 2. 4. Sin makes a Man poor weak and fearful the Grace of God which brings Salvation makes a Soul rich strong and confident for the Covenant of Grace and the Promises are more than words The Treasure is full and if I could bring my empty Sack in earnest it would be filled in earnest I give you a short hint of my Convictions my Conditions Travels and desires that in the like you may see you are not alone and that we may strive in Spirit together towards the glorious Prize of our high Calling I commend you to your and my strong Rock the blessed and ever-living God c. 1663. To D. H. N o 72. I Am attending what the Providence of God will direct further to Now and then some Doors of Providence seem to open themselves a little but as yet nothing effectually but the God of Providence who is the God of all Grace also rules them and every thing is and will be most beautiful in its season He has glorious Lessons to teach me and others in such a method and Discipline as this is and
knows how and is able to make me and the rest who are alike exercised to learn profit that 's my work at present Bless God with me that our Sun is in the Firmament though Clouds breed darkness his Nature his Word Covenant Mercy and Truth never fails and that is enough Remember that God even the Eternal Word came lived fulfilled all Righteousness died paid our Debts removed away the Curse and overcame in our Nature for us as our Mediator for us only not for himself he needed it not himself Your nature and mine is as really in Heaven as our persons are on Earth and that Magazine is open to every desiring and sincerely hankering Soul Our Redeemer is strong his heart tender his words true his Grace free and his Love strong as Death his Compassions never fail Oh let us love fear adore and believe him and in him alone lift up our heads To him I commend you c. 1663. To B. D. N o 73. I Perceive God has struck you off at last from any further hope about that troublesome business and that you did conceive you should be at London some time this Month. I think there is nothing at this day more remarkably experienced by the People of God than disappointments in the matters of this present Life but certainly 't is not their Doom but their Physick neither is the Dispensation wrath but fatherly Wisdom and rich Bounty to all the adopted Seed He gives his Children bitter Cups but yet healthful at least the issue will prove it so c. 1664. To B. D. N o 74. CLouds and darkness doth grow thicker and thicker but yet there is some light in the Lord in the midst of outward darkness Light is sown and the Harvest will come Our God is everlasting and the Covenant of his Love and Truth sure he is still unchangeably the same in his Grace whatever Changes he orders us to pass through that Promise is the same You shall not be tempted above what you are able What God spake to Jacob is every word of it true for our Faith and Learning Gen. 28. 15. I am with thee and will keep thee in all places c. Make as much room as you can for your Understanding and Affections to feed on Christ our daily Bread for Pardon Protection Direction Purging Blessing and Comfort There I leave you blessing God with you and for you that he doth make you cling upon him and to roll your eye beyond these uncertain momentany things Ply that aim and that work still for the good Will of him that dwelt and dwells in the burning Bush doth not change in the Fire and in the Water he will be with us c. 1664 To W. D. N o 75. THat you are walking Heavenward is the best News one Christian Friend can hear of another I doubt not but that you make that your Journey You as well as others have had that word of Christ fulfilled In the world you shall have trouble and I hope you have found it as true that In me viz. in Christ you shall have peace Certainly inward Peace can be had no where else in him alone that Jewel is to be enjoyed 'T is good that things below do frown when they force a Child of God to retreat and shelter himself in the bosom of him whose Love and good Will is everlasting We have but one great Care to spend our thoughts most about viz. To rest with joy in the Will of God seeking his Glory endeavouring after more of Christ's Image to be renewed in us and so with faith and patience to breath after that deliverance that will put an end to sin and trouble Afflictions are then prosperous when they are blest with a right instructing and weaning efficacy and are useful to render the excellency of things not seen more precious and desirable when they make a Soul to search and pray much and so wind out of the World then they are profitable Physick This is that frame I would be at and who can help us in this great work but he that has promised that he will never quench the smoaking Flax till he hath brought forth Judgment and Righteousness to Victory c. 1664. To D. H. N o 76. THe Lord himself be with you as a Guide Sometime fair Weather and sometime foul we must expect no other a while at the Evening it will be light yea constant clear Light and Peace when all these lower Shadows and Clouds are blown over and gone In the mean while we are sure to have Pardon Favour Life and the blessed Spirit of Life for our relief Our Prayers herein will be granted because we have a bountiful and faithful Promise for it and our Surety ready to make it good Here we are Soldiers but shall overcome through the victorious Blood of the Lamb and his Presence with us through Darkness and Light through Life and Death the Issue will be Victory through him who hath loved us Oh let the Children of Zion rejoyce in their King c. 1664. To B. J. D. N o 77. OUr Relation to each other require not only mutual Remembrance but now and then a Line or two to signifie the same As for News whatever I see or hear I write but little but would employ my thoughts and time in the best way of improvement that I can Time runs out apace with both of us the Redemption of it in order to Eternity will be found the best Wisdom What perilous times the last days will bring forth has been told us already 2 Tim. 3. 1. amongst which a dry heartless form of Godliness instead of sincere power is marked as the Mode of the last times Happy is that Soul that shall be enabled to escape those Rocks and Sands where many are like to split or run aground If God be pleased to conquer our hearts into an ingenious Resignation to his gracious Will and wise Providence and make room enough for his Authority to reign there we shall be more than Conquerors as to other difficulties The Truths we have heard concerning Christ and the way of Life by him being truly realized and become in good earnest of a transforming Power into our Souls that and that only will at length land us on a safe Shoar Let us search much pray and give serious Welcome to the Spirit of Christ our Head and the end of our work will be Peace c. 1664. To B. D. N o 78. WE must always cling upon our strong Refuge our Life our Peace present and eternal Blessedness lies in his hand and under his Covenant and Seal to give forth You are much upon my thoughts that you may be kept sincere and hold the things you have heard and received Let nothing dismay you preserve your Intercourse with Jesus Christ with all watchfulness he will provide things needful in their best season Wait on God creep to Heaven and God will order these outward
let them be glorious in this World in Holiness and be bound up with thee for ever in the Covenant of Grace into which thou hast called them Let my poor Friends that have loved me and have seen but little Grace something it may be they have seen through thy Goodness Oh be with them and make them grow abundantly Let thy Glory arise hasten it let the Kingdom of Christ be exalted Oh that the days of this Darkness may be blown away and let there be a mighty coming in of Truth Holiness Sincerity and spiritual Light and Manifestation that there may be a mighty Child-like Spirit in all thy Children I desire all these Petitions in truth Let thy People be the Wisdom the Truth the Joy of the Earth Be with me and be with all thine and this I beg in the Lord Jesus Let thy good Spirit come upon all thine Oh glorifie thy self now and ever Oh let thy good Will be done Oh let thy own Will be done Let my Will follow thy Will as the Thread follows the Needle and let it be so eternally Let my Soul believe every word that thou hast spoken shall be accomplished Thou wilt never leave till thou hast made thy Name conspicuous and all thy People rejoyce Oh why why why may not the slow coming on now make haste Oh why may not the Growth of spiritual Wisdom be sprouting forth with great Improvement as being the very Operation of the Spirit Why may not Love to thee come and damp all other Loves Why may not the Observation of thy Love thou shewest me be powerful and transforming of my Soul Why should I lie back Lord I am not sanctified at the rate thou usest means for the same Oh that I might have more of the Spirit much much more and may see the Power of God from Heaven mightily changing me Oh let not thy Spirit be wanting Oh let Truth and Power be given in O God fill the World with thy Spirit that thy work may be done tidily tidily Oh let there be a nearness between thee and the Souls of thy People Oh that never that dull Spirit in Religion may come into the World again a God-provoking Temper of Soul Oh that thy People may judge of their love to thee by the very Out-goings of their Souls to thee and account nothing a Token of Love to thee unless the Soul be as it were in some Surprizes of being thine joyned to thee perfectly as if it were about to be carried out of the World I have been a withered dry Branch Oh hasten a Spring-time in one World or another Thou hast given me Truth in the inward parts I bless thee but there is no Answer answerably I wait now I wait every day and every night a poor Waiter I am O Lord be found Oh let God be glorified Oh that I might see Religion to be something I have professed Religion scores of Years one after another and yet to have got no more of the Glory of the Grace of that Religion methinks doth import that the Devil hath a strange debilitating power but God is pleased to leave him to put a slur upon the Glory of Christ's Church in the Life of Grace and to make the ways of God seem not so exceeding different from the way of Flesh as it is and all this for Trial and all this for Shame when the eyes of the spiritual Mind be a little opened Oh when a little satisfaction is got that there is truth of Grace how doth a seduced Soul nuzzle it self in that that it is safe and doth not make out for a great Progress in Grace and Holiness And if God should leave that Soul at last under those terrible Trials that may arise from thence it may shake and put it into a terrible Consternation Alas never can I fly too far from that devouring Lion never can I fly too soon April 16. Ah sweet Grave where I shall not need any cooling Drink Being spoken to from a near Friend viz. I hope the Lord will give you in of himself some such Prospect as he did to Stephen when he was leaving the World He replied I have a little sight of him and I find no dark passage to the enjoyment of him To another Friend he said He that hath you by the hand will never leave you To a near Relation he spake thus Say to your Soul I have a Fountain that will never dry up My Lines are fallen to me in a pleasant place yea I have a goodly Heritage There should be frequent fondnesses between God and us as Children towards their Parents He farther declared that though he had an earnest desire to be gone hence yet if the Lord pleased he could be content and willing to be the last Man in the Brunt of Suffering for his sake and Name in this World or words to that effect Again he spake saying O Lord come quickly come quickly answer me by thy self My wise God is still pleased to continue me though there are no signs of a Reserve for further Service to him in this World I bless the Lord for his Goodness towards me The Consolation of God is no small thing it is no small thing it is strong Consolation the Consolation of Christ is a great thing April 17. A Friend taking his leave of him saying that he was going to visit a Person of Honour he spake to this effect Pray remember me to my Lord and tell him that I am an Expectant hoping for a Meeting where we may dwell for ever April 18. In the Morning he spake saying O Lord how do I pass through nights and days O wise God and dost thou speaking to himself account him so Lord make me to account thee wise and good Lord pardon me and receive me O happy day that is coming O blessed day that is coming I pass through Death unto eternal Life After that he said The Captive shall return there will be no Captivity O sweet Redemption Much of our Heaven here lies but in a little talk about it and when we speak a word of it we have scarce a Thought suitable to the greatness of it Some space after he fetch'd a deep Groan and with his eyes lifted up and his Right hand stretched forth as if the pains of death were upon him he said Sharp and welcome Sharp and welcome And a while after he said praying Lord let me not die with any Guilt upon me but leave it all behind Oh let not any Sin remain in me unrepented of Let not any Concurrence with the least Guilt be in me Let there be upon my Will an edge of Hatred against every Sin Create it in me now Thou canst make me to delight in that that is contrary to my own Will Oh let thy Will be pleasing to me and let my Will be every way according to thy Will Let not the Agonies of Death be too terrible let not the Surge of it be too
April 22. Being the Lord's Day in the Afternoon to a Friend that came to see him he expressed himself thus The Doctor hath told me the lightsomest News to day that he hath told me a great while in acquainting me that there is but little hope of my Continuance long in the World but the Afflictions of God's People lie near my heart Oh to be filled with the Spirit three or four hours in Prayer for the Concerns of Sion He farther spake in his particular Case c. thus What if they that have seen me shall see me no more if he sees me that hath seen my Yearnings and Groanings if he sees me again he will not say he knows me not he is a God that will not forget his Promise He who hath seen my Soul in Travel who hath seen those Pangs of desire that no other hath seen he will be ready to say in the Riches of his Grace Here is poor such a one come to my Gate Come to my Knee Come to my Mercy-Seat Oh for affectionate thoughts of God and getting into him they are things that will not dry up they will not wither that will not be parched up Oh blessed be that heart that is thorow in desires Oh where is that glorious Majesty Oh what is it to come to the first Spring of Spiritual Life To come to God to the God that hath carried me into my threescore and tenth Year with a high hand And now he fore-seeing the remainder of my days would be Sorrow and Labour to the Body he calls me off And what is threescore and ten Years compared with Eternity A poor Pittance of time wherein God hath had very little Service from me Thus I parle a little about it to get some deep thoughts of that unspeakable Majestick Grace Little can I say of my Religion more than this I love the Lord in all he did I love him in all his Image I may say I may lay me down and rest for the Lord sustaineth me I have no other I desire no other Lord glorifie thy Name I have had caring thoughts about my self and others but now thou seemest to determine the matter Thou didst see I could not stand in the Shock but in thy strength I could have stood But thou wilt not cause all thy Waves and thy Billows to pass over me Thou hast had thy Champions and wilt have thy Champions Lord the Clouds arise apace the Wicked are full of Wrath they would root out thy Interest they would make Jacob low they are set upon Mischief and Spight Arise arise O God let the Lamb deliver let the Lamb overcome let thy unreasonable Enemies be turned over to Judgment Beautifie the place of thy Holiness confirm the Weak fix the Staggering Let thy People be able to meet Sufferings to put on Faith and Patience and say Aha Aha We are for God and his Ways Let thy People meet Death meet Losses meet whatever the Enemy can do and say We scorn your Cruelty Oh that thy People may stick by thee when there is nothing but Violence and Contradiction of thy Will O Lord work wonders for thy People break the Arm cut asunder the Bow of the Ungodly Oh let Shame be upon those that would take away thy Worship Glorifie thy self appear and stand an invincible Champion in Israel Let the earth know that thou dost possess the Gates of thine Enemies Let my Soul come into the Bundle of Life let my Soul come to all that that is promised by Jesus Christ I am to receive the Salvation of my Soul with exceeding Joy Am I near to the great Revelation of Christ to know more than ever Solomon did with that Perfection of Nature he had and Attainment of Grace Am I near to attain more than ever Paul could reach to by the Power of Grace and to know more of the Covenant of Grace than Abraham himself did and all the Saints while they were here in the World Oh I am confounded I am confounded and astonished I wonder I wonder at Free Grace and am amazed for want of more Faith The Filthy the Filthy duggle of a respect to my own Works which would follow me and spoil me and spoil all the Mystery of Free Grace c. Oh that now at last the Glory of Free Grace might lift me into the eternal place of it To a near Relation he spake thus Brother you are come to take your leave of me The Doctor as a sweet Messenger told me to day that I am near my Change I am now going from Shadows to Substance from things imperfect to things compleat and the thoughts of it even confound me I have been trading in the things of God for almost threescore years as to the experience of it and now after this long WOOF upon the LOOM it is to be taken off and all of it VIEWED and I know a World of Evil there is but I have always had a Sufficiency of the Grace of the Gospel declared to me that as defects came in they might be removed and by his Grace I have kept on with some desire with some delight with some Faith and Chear and now the RECKONING is to be made O my God there is a great Transaction upon me I throw my self upon Christ in the Gospel I sink if Christ sinks I have had nothing else to rest the Sole of my Foot upon now let thy Mercy be for me Thou hast given me good hope through Grace now Lord answer every good word upon which thou hast caused my Soul to hope Thou hast brought me hitherto so far to the very end of the Wilderness now O God bring me to thy Canaan I have waited for it Many other Sicknesses have not removed me now thou seemest to say This shall Now let me leave all my Filth behind me take it off There is a TRANSLATION let that Translation be effected upon me O Lord let not that Temptation come upon me that I have prayed to no purpose that I have faltered in the things wherein thou hast steered my Soul in Truth and in Spirit Lord let not a dead thought abide with any ugly savour in me now when thy Providences with the Concurrence of thy Servants meaning the Doctors say that thou callest me when they say The Master calleth thee Oh Oh was there ever such a day Had I ever such a day to be standing in the Portal to be waving up my hand to be knocking Oh for an Opening Lord say to me I will open Come in and let us sup together No less O Lord. Answer the Breathings of my Soul all along all my days Thou art faithful thou hast chosen me deny me not O thou that art Truth thou knowest that I have chosen thee Thou knowest my Life in this World hath been Death and Poyson to me without thee and now I come only expecting what thou hast promised and not what I have procured for there hath been my
BATTEL all my days not to look for any thing of my own procuring but to throw my self on thy procuring Grace there hath been the WAR I said if there be not the Son of God to save me all my Works are vain there is no bottom in what I have done It is alone what thou dost in thy Council and Purpose of Grace There I have desired to lie and to comfort my self in and have had comfort therein And upon that score thou hast made me ashamed of the unsuitable Actings of mine thou hast made me ashamed of them Now I would flee over these my great Sins upon the Wings of Faith and now Lord let me have Light and Truth Thou knowest I appeal to thee thy self O God thou knowest things contradictory to thy Doctrine and the Grace contained in it have been my burthen Thou knowest I have not had Quiet but in Reliance on thine own Free Grace and this thou hast done Thou layedst not in this Principle for no use but to assure the Soul thou wilt not mis-lead it O Lord save the present contending part of thy Church in the World This hath been the BATTEL all along Man lost himself quite Thou hast brought in a Salvation and didst give it and thy People have received it and thy People never had Comfort but as this Grace did shine forth Thy Children have been killed and slain for this very thing And now O Lord maintain Oh maintain the great Quarrel What doth all thy Peoples Salvation depend on this and shall the Enemy despoil them of it No no. I am going to thee and let me go upon the Wing of thy abundant Grace and so let all that have found this Grace and have given Credit to it I have a World of Evil to say of my self for I have nothing else but that that I lean upon is the Truth the Vertue the Grace and Faithfulness of my God Lord help me in this great thing and all thy People in this particular that they may be comforted in it and rejoyce in the hopes of it There is none of us yet that hath passed through Death divers Christian Friends being then present many of us have been brought near to it but have not actually passed it And now seeing some of us are dropping into it Lord let not these great things be strange to us nor be little to us as to the settling of our ALL Oh had we made better Markets of it better Improvements we might have been at a mighty Brightness in Holiness Blessed be thy Name we have been kept doing but we have had many Put-bies we have not walked like Persons of so high a Calling but thou pardonest in such a way that the whole Heaven will ring of thy pardoning Goodness Help us to jog on help us to jog on that every one of us may come up and fulfil our Task that when we leave the World we may look upon it as a Memento of that unspeakable thing of a GOD that makes his own Choice between one Soul and another He further prayed thus Help me till I come help me a while O Lord I know I am in the Flesh and have the things relating to the Flesh But O Lord till thou removest me hence be teaching me still care for me still let all things preceding so great a Change be wrought in me and let thy Care Blessing Love and Grace be upon my dear Associates Kindred and Friends I leave behind Lord keep them purge them make them shine more and more make the Generation now and hereafter more holy Let the Vengeance of the Wicked return upon their own heads let none of thine faint in the day of Battel give in Strength Faith superabundant to the Troubles thy People meet with Give Courage Joy and Valour which the Enemy cannot vanquish and rid the World of these Impurities O Lord make haste and destroy Autichrist O Lord meet with the Proud Oh cut their Hoofs make them ashamed with perpetual Confusion and undo their Projects make them stink all the Earth over I leave these things with thee I have perused thy Word through thy Mercy if in any thing I step aside pardon it for thou hast infinite Measures of Pardon with thee O God be with me for ever and receive my Spirit whenever thou takest me out of the World Then he directed his Speech to an aged Person present thus You have lived in Profession long as I have done set your self before God with sincerity as if you had never yet put any Foot in his Paths beg of him Truth in the inward parts beg his Spirit and with full subjection to him account a Communion in it self only considered a pitiful thing and that that is to be feared hath been the occasion of the Ruin of many a Soul See to it that you be a real Member of Christ I do not know but that I have as much reason to question mine own Soul and it may be more than to question yours But hearken a little for now I come to the upshot there is no dallying my God hath a piercing eye the Truths I have heard they are from God The same Care Fear Cautiousness I would have concerning others as of my self Then he spake to all in general Oh that after so much of the Spirit of God appearing we might not be poor simple unlearned things for here we have had a little and seen a little of the Temptations of the Devil and a great deal too much What is the end of our Church-Communion but that we may be brought into the Fellowship of Jesus Christ indeed in-deed in-deed And then he hath taken care for the Outward and the Inward Man to make the Soul steady ingenious and diligent and to study always to honour him to give him Honour and to defend his Honour And thus I hope the Lord will go along with us also Oh Oh Oh let there be none of the ugly stench of a barren Religion Oh Oh Oh that the Holy Spirit may be doing in every one of our hearts that such a little pittance of time may not be lost We are even at the Judgment-Seat every one of us here is a Judgment-Seat Each of us have often Sicknesses and I perceive my concluding Sickness is come and to the Judgment-Seat of Christ I must go Oh for my ADVOCATE he will not hide himself We talk of the World to come and mind not the nature of it the Lord open our eyes I would be at it I would be at it My dear Friends it is a pleasant sight to see one another but suppose before a general known Appearance of Christ we might have a Months time and that to be together one would think with what exceeding seriousness we should improve that time And truly now is much alike in the length of time here It is but a short thing when we have considered it God hath said such a thing and it is true
O Lord wilt thou look down O let not our Seed our Kindred our Relations be a means to fill the Kingdom of Satan further and further We look upon some of our Relations sometimes and there we cannot see the Likeness of Christ the powerful working of their turning unto God we cannot see any thing to give us any assurance or to give us good hope through Grace that there is a happy Eternity abiding them Oh that thou wouldst lessen the Devil's Kingdom and enlarge Christ's Kingdom Why should not the Word in the power of it be received O Lord fall in privately in Retirement upon the hearts of such poor Creatures whom we love but cannot save but thou canst And thou art our God and we love thee and we beg it of thee that thou mayst have a mighty increased Host to sing thy praise for ever and that our Relations may be part thereof considerably We have prayed little for one another in the Spirit for we have done but little work for thee Oh that an Afternoon Prayer may come up before thee and be heard Oh! oh oh while we can let our hearts bleed over sinners that live in their sins Christ had nothing to do but to save Souls in all his Travelling in the World Oh that Salvation may be unto us the great desirable thing the salvation of our own Souls and the Salvation of others It is a great thing to be going just into eternal Fetters and to be going just into eternal Freedom It is a great thing to be going just into the eternal Pound and to be going just into eternal Liberation and every one of us is going and shall go and cannot avoid it into one of these We must in among the damned for ever or in among the saved for ever there is no medium no manner of medium between one and the other Oh for Wisdom Oh for Wisdom we talk freely one to another we are Friends we have delight one in another we visit one another in our well-being in our ill-being we sympathize one with another but all of us one as well as another must pass through this great Trial and these great things there will be no stop no hindrance We have and do approve of one another with some respect but Oh nothing but Truth in the inward parts nothing but coming up to the very mind of the Spirit of God Let the Grace of Christ now be pursued hugely infinitely lets know one another but in the Lord love one another regard one another respect one another only in the Lord and through him and for him and to him O Lord the faculties of Humane Nature will not be disabled when the perfect state comes which are now disabled by sin and disabled by Infirmities Thus now you see my Soul having objects before mine Eye of a great nature and finding my self greatly incompetent for them I grope about them for I know it is my dear and only concern I would not dye like a fool and I would have all my loving Friends partake of that goodness which I have had perswasion and have perswasion doth lye in a sincere closure with those Spiritual things I do insist on it and say my full Faith is in this That whosoever doth reject this Salvation shall have no place in it and whosoever doth not with a whole heart set out for it shall not know it and whosoever shall indeed give a turn over to the Lord for it and commit it self unto God to be tryed to be taught and to be lead such a Soul shall not at all lose the good of it nor any part of the good of it and having this confidence I desire to set me to cling to him who hath called me some years ago and in some measure by his Grace I have heard the Call and accepted it He then directed his Speech to some of his near Relations then present more particularly by way of Counsel c. in such words as these Dear Sister Remember me to your Son and pray tell him from me that I long for his Salvation and let it not be unpleasing news to him that the SCRIPTURE must be his Rule and Delight otherwise he will perish eternally Every thought I have of him doth come with a great weight upon me and my very Bowels do even bleed towards him and it would be glorious News to me to hear that the Almighty had got a compleat victory over his Heart O Lord come in upon his Soul that there may be no dismal perishing Ah ah we have had our days of Friendliness together Lord grant that none of us may be separated each from other with a doleful separation Oh! Oh! that Divine Grace may come with power and do that which our hearts could not be aware of He is the object of our pity oh that he may be the object of God's pity he is able to bound him he can give a broken Leg some stroak upon the outward Man some sickness some providence that may have a Mighty Teaching voice I have often thought God may cause his Conversion work to ring to the Glory of God Oh that you and others may pray greatly And that that poor young Woman may not be as a nullity neither but as one filled with the fruits of the Spirit that Grace may revive in that Family Oh Grace Grace Grace nothing maules down vanity and vileness but the Majesty of Grace Dear Sister now do you set on work we are yet upon pardoning ground Pray much Give away your self to God in length and breadth The Lord make you the brokenedst hearted one and the wisest woman about this Town Rummidge over your Religion again and see whether it come up kindly to the MARK I may say my Soul doth dearly love you and whenever I see you my heart doth in some degree spring a little For my poor sake look out for a TRUE LODGING Well I leave it with you I shall see you shortly again at the Judgment-seat of God I leave this with him my purposes my designs my aymes with him who is holy and sin pardoning His Counsel to his Wife was in these words God hath given you his precious Grace walk humbly labour in all things to come to the very life of it in Religion And I have much perswasion that God will bring this Child meaning his only Daughter in within the Covenant Your great danger is your unbelief there lyes your great danger you have in my observation true Faith strong Faith and yet not ready to put forth in all Cases 't is of a right Grain and it hath the concomitant to it singleness of heart Be Practical be Practical that you be putting of it out every minute for I do think there is a very dear indulgence between Christ and your Soul you have been born down with many cares with many scatterings of heart and Christ hath pittied you under it and owned you under it He hath
able faithful 1 Thes 5. 24. 8. Do I rejoyce in hope Rom. 5. 2. and praise Rev. 5. 9. on this account IV. Upon this Relief by Christ Do I yet go farther as Esther did to execute the Children of Haman after he was dead yea to see the power of the Prince of this World broken in me What is the temper and employment of a redeemed Soul in his justified and renewed state It is to shew forth the vertue of him who hath called us from Darkness to Light from Sin and Bondage to Freedom Holiness and Righteousness Luk. 1. 75. And Oh that this might be and appear in my Soul TO THAT END let my heart suffer and attend to some Questions concerning this whereby I may further know that I am the Lords and not my own Do I account Christ only to be the Fountain and Author of Renewing and Holiness and so cast my self by Faith on him for it as well as for Pardon seeing I cannot think a thought nor will nor do any good thing of my self 2 Cor. 3. 5. Phil. 2. 13. being created in Christ thereto Ephes 2. 10. and quickned therein by him Is the Communion of the Father and the Son in a way of light and leading by his Spirit the Element I breath in so that Holiness is my Choice and sweet delight Rom. 7. 22. Phil. 3. 10 c. and 20. Our conversation is in heaven c. Do I make designs against the Old Man and to cherish the New by the lusting of the Spirit against the Flesh Gal. 5. 17. countermining the devices of Satan 2 Cor. 2. 11. watching trying all means Phil. 3. 11. to increase Holiness Do I chuse and aim at pleasing God in what I do as well as do any thing that is good in it self Isa 56. 4. Col. 1. 10 11. In matters of Worship Do I aim to converse indeed with God himself as having to do with his presence 2 Cor. 2. 17. acting therein to him Col. 3. 16 17. Do I labour to suck sanctified Light and real Holiness out of the Ordinances Psal 36. 8. which is the Fatness of God's House and tends to make the new Creature flourish Psal 92. 13. Do I bow down and comply with every Word of God submitting and assenting to its full scope Psal 119. 127 128. Do I rowl my eye towards God eyeing his Wisdom Goodness Righteousness and Providence in natural things 1 Cor. 10. 31. and in things that providencially come to pass 2 Cor. 7. 6. 2 Tim. 4. 17. Act. 12. 23. This is to walk with God Do I plot which way I may advance the Interest of Christ and his Gospel in the Capacity in which he hath set me 1 Cor. 9. 15 19 23. and to prevent the disparagement of it 1 Pet. 2. 12. Tit. 2. 10. Do I consider whether I go forward or backward in the Trade of Holiness Heb. 5. 12. Whether there be growth or not declining or not Am I gaining and reaching forward Phil. 3. 13. 2 Thes 1. 3. If so it shews my Centre is above In these and such like things the mutual Relation betwixt God and a Regenerate Person do shine forth They are tokens that God dwelleth there and he in God Such an one is in a new State because he has betook himself to the Laws Company and Mode of the new Creation created of God in Christ translated to a state of Life in God Lastly A Christian's renewed State obliges him to glorifie God in Body and Spirit and he doth so viz. 1. WHEN the Soul doth acknowledge God to be that which he is in himself Rom. 11. 36. Of him and through him and to him are all things to him be Glory for ever and ever Amen That he is infinitely excellent in his Nature and in his Works and in his Soveraignty 1 Chron. 29. 11 12 13. 2. WHEN God is acknowledged to be that which he is to us in Jesus Christ Exod. 33. 18 19. and 34. 6 7. 2 Cor. 4. 6. and glorified through Christ 1 Cor. 1. 30 31. 1 Pet. 4. 11. 3. WHEN the Spirit of a Man within him and the outward Man also concurring according to his Capacity do act towards God in an inward complying with and actual demonstration of the glorious Nature Will and Grace of God Which is called a walking worthy of God 1 Thes 2. 12. Col. 1. 10. that is to say conformable to him as the word worthy seems to import comparing Eph. 4. 1. with Eph. 4. 4. and as it were bearing his very Image and thereby manifesting what God is to us and what we are to him viz. that God is ours and we are his Now this acting towards God has great variety of Exercise in Believers for a Believer is the Temple of God in which his Glory is more excellently displayed than in all the World besides A BELIEVER by his peculiar nearness to and interest in God is capacitated as a living and active Agent to glorifie God 1 Pet. 2. 5 9. Levit. 10. 3. more than another who is only passive as Pharaoh was Exod. 14. 17. So then he who is not his own but the Lords and the Lord is his his proper Element is to be glorifying of God in all things 1 Cor. 10. 31. as appears in these and the like Particulars viz. 1. To reverence and adore the Majesty of God in all his holy Attributes and Works as Neh. 9. 6. Jer. 32. 17 18 19. Dan. 9. 4 c. and as David and all the people of God were wont to do 2. To be abased before God in the sence of our Disproportionableness and Corruption as Abraham Gen. 18. 27. Jacob Gen. 32. 10. Ezra 9. 15. Dan. 9. 7. did 3. To justifie God in all his dealings Job 36. 3. Psal 51. 4. as Daniel c. 9. v. 4. with Confession and imploring his Mercy Joshua 7. 19. Dan. 9. 18 19. 4. To honour the Father in the Son Joh. 5. 23. and through him 1 Pet. 4. 11. 5. To own God in Christ as the Fountain of every Grace 1 Pet. 5. 10. and every good and perfect Gift Jam. 1. 17. 1 Pet. 4. 11. and the Establisher and Perfecter of it Matth. 6. 13. Thine is the kingdom power und glory Amen 6. To adore him in his Word 2 Chron. 20. 18. Isa 39. 8. Psal 56. 4. and 119. 106. believing it To worship him with Reverence Psal 86. 6. and 99. 9. and to own him in his people Gal. 1. 24. Matth. 10. 24. and them for his sake 7. To abound with the gracious Fruits of Righteousness Joh. 15. 8. Phil. 1. 11. which are by Jesus Christ to the Praise and Glory of God 8. To confess Christ before Men Matth. 10. 33. suffering reproach 1 Pet. 4. 14. and death for his sake Joh. 21. 19. And now Oh that God would lead my heart through all these things by an impartial Search and cause me to compare my present frame of heart and Resolutions with these particular Truths of
his own Word and bring me up to glorifie him in my Body and Spirit which I trust are his Let me yet farther demand of my self a few Questions which relate to the glorifying of God in my Soul and in my Walk 1. Is it so with me that I cannot be quiet but restless under guilt and distance from God Psal 32. 3 4 5. Do I cry Return O Lord Isa 63. 17. why art thou a Stranger Jer. 14. 8. 2. Do I hanker after more Heart-impressions of the Knowledge of God Exod. 33. 18. and 34. 6. Shew me thy Glory 3. Is the whole Will of God my delight and his Word my daily Diet Jer. 15. 16. Job 23. 12. 4. Do I praise Psal 50. 23. and acknowledge God in daily Providences Gen. 48. 15. Prov. 3. 6. not repining at his Discipline Psal 119. 75. but brought nearer to him by Calamities Isa 17. 7. 5. Do I own him so that the hiding of his face doth darken all other comforts to me Psal 77. 2. and his presence support and satisfie in the absence of earthly comforts Psal 142. 5. as it was with David at Ziglag 1 Sam. 30. 6. 6. Do I so approve my self to God that the Approbation Esteem or Praise of Man doth rather vex than please me when my Conscience within me doth smite me 2 Cor. 10. 18. Rom. 2. 29. 7. In case of guilt and fear Do I cast my self upon the boundless Mercy of God declared in Christ to be pardoned purged and revived as a sufficient Remedy 2 Cor. 12. 9. 8. Do I hanker after pure Communion with God so that my heart pants out Oh that my ways were directed c. Ps 119. 5. Cant. 8. 1. Oh Oh? Ps 38. 9. THESE and such like workings do testifie that God is the highest Good and the Centre of Blessedness and infinitely glorious And in these spiritual Operations the Soul doth declare and witness him to be so and therein do evidence that God is his and he is Gods and hereby is highly privileged God will not take things at the worst with him Matth. 26. 40 41. When such an one is at a loss Mercy will surprize and Deliverance overtake him Ezek. 36. 11. when dull his Ears shall be awakened to hear as the Learned Isa 50. 4. he shall be kept night and day Isa 27. 3. Christ will trim and dress him by the Word Ephes 5. 26. and he will earn towards him Job 14. 15. and be with him in trouble Isa 43. 2 3 c. and God will not be ashamed to be called his God Heb. 11. 16. he will wipe away his Tears teach him by his Spirit pardon his Sins justifie his Person in the Person of Christ and confess him to be his at the last day where he shall see his face with joy Job 33. 26. and ever be with the Lord 1 Thes 4. 17. Happy is the people that is in such a case yea Happy is the people happy is every particular person whose God is the Lord Psal 144. 15. AN APPENDIX A CONFLICT of Mind HOw soon did Peter James and John forget the glorious Transfiguration and fell asleep when the Temptation came How soon is Sight gone when the Sun is eclipsed So it is with me When shall I have skill to discern and resist the beginnings of Decay How soon doth a Troop of Armed Men break in at an unguarded Gap I cannot thrust them out again my self but will rather go to him who hath his Bridle in their Jaws and can both turn them back and also lock the Door against them Oh that I could lift up a Jehoshaphat's Cry to the Lord of Hosts Then would the day clear up and I should yet see my Salvation come flying upon the Wings of the Wind and mounted upon the Glouds for my help I have one hard task to do but O thou to whom nothing is hard reveal thy Will and conquer mine My sore Task and Travel is this How to retain a close Application of Union with God in Christ so as that I may prevent the loss of tender Converse and holy reverential Familiarity and Intercourse with him An immoderate minding of somewhat in it self for ought I can yet see not unlawful has been a thorn in my flesh for several days which has spent much venom against my inward Man but I must not succumb to any Adversary there is no safety but in overcoming Help me throughly O my God at this plunge and thou shalt have the honour of the day I would fain enquire into my Soul how I contracted this Distemper and upon enquiry I find it had such steps as these I was withdrawn I know not how from the tender sight of Christ and influences of spiritual Warmth being damp'd Night came upon me and I considered it not my Soul fell asleep but without any Refreshment I awaked a little now and then but Slumber benummed me that I could not rise up I would fain cry out for help but my words were like an Arrow without Feathers that would not reach the Mark and all this while an earthly and momentany matter of delight solicited my fancy aad proffered some pleasure to my mind and in regard I judged it not materially evil I gave way till it had eaten into my Soul like a Canker and began to build its Nest in the very place which I had lately prepared and devoted for the Entertainment of Christ only It was restless and would not yield to Christ's Supremacy in my Affections but still offered some Moon-light Satisfaction to my Mind insteed of the withdrawn Beams of the Sun and when Christ whispered some Conviction into my heart and made it ake and raised some small yernings after him this Glo-worm glistered upon me and though it had neither light nor heat yet it would pretend a competent Ballance instead of the true spiritual light and warmth which I lately had but now found it was retired at a distance from me for my trial and exercise I discerned the Snare but herein lay my Strait My Judgment told me the matter it self was necessary and that a moderate diligence might be employed about it but neither that nor any thing else must dethrone Christ from the chief Seat in my Affections but I found it had so twisted into my fancy that I knew not how to use my thoughts about it with that moderation as would consist with Christ's supream Government and Sway in my inmost delight and affections So that how to divide between the matter it self and my excessive affection to it to do the one and guard against the other here lies the difficulty The matter on which this inordinate fancy fed it self was something relating to LITERATURE which I judged in its own nature lawful and useful To remedy which distemper I poured out my complaint before the Lord and began to muse the following Meditations How to pursue a lawful thing lawfully Be silent O clamorous unreasonable Sence thy Fancy