carnal_a motive_n be_v a_o poor_a thing_n lord_n how_o be_o i_o distract_v and_o tear_v in_o piece_n with_o these_o thought_n nay_o lord_n if_o thou_o will_v have_v i_o go_v with_o these_o burden_n on_o my_o soul_n do_v whatever_o seem_v good_a in_o thy_o eye_n if_o i_o may_v but_o drudge_n in_o thy_o house_n though_o i_o lie_v among_o the_o pot_n yet_o to_o be_v a_o scullion_n in_o thy_o house_n be_v better_a than_o to_o sit_v at_o the_o table_n of_o prince_n lord_n i_o be_o undo_v except_o thou_o work_v a_o miracle_n of_o mercy_n yet_o if_o i_o be_o undo_v it_o may_v be_v before_o thou_o give_v i_o over_o and_o discover_v i_o to_o the_o world_n thou_o will_v let_v i_o do_v something_o more_o that_o i_o may_v glorify_v thou_o and_o edify_v the_o people_n nay_o it_o may_v be_v thou_o may_v suffer_v i_o as_o long_o as_o i_o live_v to_o do_v much_o of_o which_o thou_o may_v have_v glory_n lord_n if_o my_o heart_n be_v not_o upright_o yet_o o_o that_o my_o action_n and_o my_o preach_n may_v be_v such_o that_o man_n see_v and_o hear_v they_o may_v be_v stir_v up_o to_o glorify_v thou_o by_o do_v those_o thing_n sincere_o which_o ay_o it_o may_v be_v do_v out_o of_o hypocrisy_n i_o be_o sure_a too_o much_o hypocrisy_n lord_n i_o have_v beg_v for_o such_o a_o heart_n as_o may_v not_o deceive_v i_o nor_o dishonour_v thou_o o_o my_o god_n what_o shall_v i_o do_v nay_o lord_n what_o will_v thou_o do_v i_o be_o undo_v unless_o thou_o do_v work_v mighty_o above_o all_o that_o i_o can_v speak_v or_o think_v according_a to_o that_o mighty_a power_n wherewith_o thou_o do_v raise_v the_o lord_n from_o the_o dead_a o_o that_o i_o may_v be_v so_o raise_v that_o i_o may_v return_v no_o more_o to_o corruption_n medit._fw-la xlvi_o by_o this_o i_o know_v and_o be_o sensible_a it_o be_v not_o for_o any_o man_n to_o live_v by_o his_o own_o strength_n by_o my_o know_v how_o impossible_a it_o be_v for_o a_o sick_a man_n to_o recover_v without_o thou_o if_o a_o live_a man_n can_v speak_v how_o can_v a_o condemn_a man_n live_v without_o thou_o if_o live_v bone_n can_v move_v how_o can_v dry_a bone_n live_v lord_n thou_o meet_v i_o not_o at_o duty_n thou_o speak_v not_o to_o i_o there_o thou_o speak_v to_o i_o in_o mercy_n and_o i_o answer_v not_o in_o judgement_n and_o i_o carry_v myself_o as_o a_o sleepy_a man_n that_o be_v unwilling_a to_o be_v awake_v what_o will_v thou_o do_v with_o i_o lord_n when_o i_o will_v neither_o speak_v to_o thou_o nor_o answer_v thou_o when_o thou_o speak_v o_o the_o weakness_n of_o my_o grace_n and_o the_o power_n of_o thy_o mercy_n those_o sin_n i_o have_v have_v a_o mind_n to_o commit_v thou_o have_v take_v from_o i_o the_o opportunity_n to_o commit_v it_o be_v a_o comfort_n to_o i_o that_o i_o have_v not_o opportunity_n but_o it_o will_v be_v a_o great_a comfort_n not_o to_o have_v a_o mind_n a_o instance_n according_a to_o the_o rule_v give_v for_o meditate_v on_o the_o scripture_n a_o meditation_n on_o these_o word_n isa_n 66._o 2._o but_o to_o this_o man_n will_v i_o look_v even_o to_o he_o that_o be_v poor_a and_o of_o a_o contrite_a spirit_n and_o tremble_v at_o my_o word_n let_v we_o serious_o consider_v o_o my_o soul_n that_o if_o a_o angel_n or_o god_n himself_o from_o heaven_n have_v speak_v these_o word_n in_o our_o hear_n as_o once_o christ_n do_v to_o paul_n when_o he_o be_v go_v to_o damascus_n sure_o i_o think_v they_o will_v have_v very_o much_o affect_v we_o be_v the_o word_n of_o god_n less_o his_o word_n because_o it_o be_v write_v i_o read_v that_o the_o apostle_n 2_o pet._n 1._o 17_o 18_o 19_o speak_v of_o a_o voice_n that_o he_o himself_o hear_v from_o heaven_n say_v that_o he_o have_v a_o more_o sure_a word_n of_o prophecy_n that_o be_v as_o i_o conceive_v that_o he_o be_v no_o less_o sure_a that_o the_o word_n of_o the_o prophet_n be_v the_o very_a word_n of_o god_n than_o those_o that_o he_o hear_v with_o his_o ear_n then_o lâ—t_v we_o not_o be_v less_o affect_v with_o these_o word_n then_o if_o we_o ourselves_o have_v hear_v god_n himself_o speak_v they_o 2._o nor_o let_v we_o think_v that_o they_o less_o concern_v we_o then_o if_o we_o have_v earnest_o beg_v of_o god_n to_o tell_v we_o what_o he_o will_v have_v we_o to_o be_v &_o do_v and_o as_o a_o answer_n of_o our_o prayer_n we_o have_v hear_v he_o speak_v to_o we_o from_o heaven_n in_o particular_a to_o this_o man_n will_v i_o look_v that_o be_v of_o a_o poor_a and_o contrite_a spirit_n and_o tremble_v at_o my_o word_n for_o doubtless_o god_n have_v not_o cause_v his_o word_n to_o be_v write_v in_o vain_a at_o a_o venture_n for_o whosoever_o shall_v read_v it_o but_o know_v not_o who_o they_o be_v shall_v read_v it_o but_o he_o know_v every_o particular_a person_n to_o who_o hand_n his_o word_n shall_v come_v and_o know_v his_o word_n shall_v come_v to_o my_o hand_n and_o i_o shall_v read_v these_o weary_a word_n and_o therefore_o cause_v they_o to_o be_v write_v in_o particular_a for_o my_o sake_n though_o not_o exclusive_o christ_n die_v for_o all_o his_o people_n yet_o paul_n say_v that_o he_o love_v i_o and_o give_v himself_o for_o i_o and_o christ_n do_v think_v particular_o of_o paul_n and_o so_o of_o every_o one_o else_o for_o who_o he_o die_v and_o give_v himself_o up_o as_o a_o sacrifice_n and_o ransom_n particular_o think_v on_o and_o intend_v every_o one_o that_o shall_v be_v save_v by_o his_o death_n if_o a_o minister_n shall_v go_v to_o one_o that_o be_v give_v to_o swear_v and_o tell_v he_o of_o the_o heinousness_n of_o that_o sin_n and_o lay_v it_o home_o to_o his_o conscience_n in_o private_a it_o general_o do_v affect_v he_o more_o than_o to_o hear_v the_o same_o sin_n reprove_v in_o public_a yet_o he_o shall_v as_o particular_o apply_v it_o then_o though_o he_o have_v not_o in_o this_o respect_n so_o much_o reason_n to_o apply_v it_o as_o i_o have_v to_o apply_v these_o word_n to_o my_o own_o soul_n for_o the_o minister_n do_v not_o nor_o can_v actual_o and_o particular_o intend_v every_o one_o that_o be_v guilty_a of_o the_o sin_n he_o reprove_v for_o he_o know_v not_o every_o particular_a person_n that_o be_v guilty_a of_o the_o sin_n he_o reprove_v as_o god_n do_v every_o one_o that_o read_v his_o word_n therefore_o let_v we_o take_v this_o and_o apply_v it_o to_o ourselves_o as_o if_o god_n have_v send_v these_o word_n write_v with_o his_o own_o hand_n to_o we_o in_o particular_a when_o it_o be_v say_v that_o the_o scripture_n be_v write_v for_o our_o learning_n etc._n etc._n rom._n 15._o 4._o i_o conceive_v the_o meaning_n be_v not_o only_o by_o way_n of_o sufficiency_n but_o by_o way_n of_o intention_n efficacy_n &_o decree_n in_o resgect_n of_o his_o people_n that_o be_v not_o only_o that_o there_o be_v a_o sufficient_a matter_n in_o scripture_n to_o instruct_v we_o but_o that_o god_n do_v intend_v and_o decree_n that_o this_o place_n of_o scripture_n shall_v instruct_v every_o particular_a one_o of_o his_o people_n that_o be_v instruct_v by_o it_o 3._o and_o indeed_o what_o be_v the_o reason_n that_o i_o now_o read_v these_o word_n and_o do_v now_o intend_v to_o meditate_v on_o they_o be_v it_o not_o or_o certain_o it_o ought_v to_o be_v that_o i_o shall_v try_v whether_o i_o be_o such_o or_o whether_o i_o have_v such_o a_o heart_n and_o spirit_n as_o these_o word_n signify_v and_o if_o i_o be_o not_o so_o much_o as_o i_o ought_v to_o be_v that_o i_o shall_v humble_v myself_o and_o be_v as_o true_o sensible_a and_o as_o much_o affect_v and_o much_o more_o than_o i_o be_o with_o those_o bodily_a infirmity_n that_o lie_v upon_o i_o and_o if_o so_o be_v there_o be_v a_o receipt_n give_v i_o which_o i_o have_v a_o long_a time_n seek_v for_o and_o endeavour_v to_o get_v be_v assure_v that_o if_o i_o have_v it_o it_o will_v cure_v i_o sure_o i_o shall_v not_o only_o read_v it_o because_o i_o may_v be_v able_a to_o tell_v other_o what_o will_v cure_v such_o a_o disease_n or_o to_o enable_v myself_o to_o discourse_n of_o that_o matter_n but_o i_o shall_v read_v it_o with_o abundance_n of_o joy_n and_o unquestionable_a resolution_n to_o take_v it_o alas_o lord_n why_o do_v i_o not_o read_v thy_o word_n so_o also_o where_o the_o unquestionable_a remedy_n of_o all_o spiritual_a disease_n be_v set_v down_o sure_o it_o be_v my_o senselesness_n of_o the_o mischief_n of_o these_o spiritual_a distemper_n that_o make_v i_o so_o little_o affect_v with_o grief_n for_o they_o and_o with_o joy_n that_o i_o have_v find_v out_o the_o remedy_n for_o they_o 4._o
ourselves_o of_o the_o scope_n of_o the_o word_n that_o so_o we_o may_v the_o more_o full_o understand_v their_o drift_n and_o aim_n and_o we_o be_v not_o to_o let_v the_o truth_n pass_v until_o we_o have_v by_o effection_n examination_n or_o resolution_n some_o way_n advantage_v ourselves_o in_o the_o most_o holy_a faith_n or_o some_o way_n else_o benefit_v our_o soul_n by_o a_o general_a view_n take_v of_o the_o word_n of_o the_o text_n we_o may_v see_v the_o abundant_a sweetness_n and_o fragrancy_n of_o the_o word_n of_o god_n as_o we_o do_v the_o odour_n of_o flower_n by_o scent_v they_o now_o meditation_n draw_v forth_o the_o honey_n of_o the_o flower_n into_o our_o bowel_n and_o nourish_v we_o thereby_o the_o beauty_n and_o odour_n of_o flower_n be_v very_o delightful_a but_o they_o nourish_v not_o so_o bare_a understanding_n of_o the_o word_n themselves_o do_v rather_o delight_v then_o profit_v we_o and_o if_o we_o go_v no_o further_o it_o be_v but_o so_o much_o on_o in_o order_n to_o solemn_a divine_a meditation_n i_o look_v upon_o it_o as_o one_o of_o the_o great_a sin_n of_o the_o professor_n of_o england_n that_o the_o read_n studying_z and_o meditate_v upon_o scripture_n be_v so_o much_o neglect_v hence_o people_n grow_v not_o in_o knowledge_n i_o have_v write_v the_o great_a thing_n of_o my_o law_n and_o they_o be_v strange_a thing_n unto_o you_o say_v god_n hos._n 8._o 12._o do_v any_o man_n let_v the_o letter_n of_o his_o friend_n lie_v by_o he_o and_o never_o read_v they_o if_o lawver_n shall_v never_o read_v law_n book_n but_o have_v they_o in_o their_o study_n it_o will_v be_v very_o absurd_a how_o wonderful_a will_v they_o be_v to_o seek_v in_o the_o resolve_v of_o case_n if_o upon_o the_o thousand_o part_n so_o good_a ground_n as_o we_o have_v that_o the_o scripture_n be_v the_o word_n of_o god_n we_o shall_v hear_v of_o some_o prophecy_n from_o god_n set_v down_o what_o will_v be_v the_o doom_n of_o england_n and_o all_o these_o public_a transaction_n will_v not_o every_o one_o be_v industruous_a to_o get_v it_o and_o read_v it_o we_o have_v a_o more_o sure_a word_n of_o prophecy_n and_o that_o which_o teach_v of_o matter_n of_o far_o great_a concernment_n than_o the_o temporal_a welfare_n of_o this_o nation_n and_o yet_o it_o lie_v by_o we_o as_o a_o thing_n forget_v the_o rule_n for_o meditate_v upon_o the_o scripture_n be_v either_o those_o which_o high_o concern_v the_o matter_n of_o meditation_n or_o the_o right_a manner_n of_o they_o for_o the_o right_a manner_n of_o our_o meditation_n let_v it_o be_v with_o all_o reverence_n and_o humility_n and_o sense_n of_o god_n majesty_n upon_o our_o spirit_n and_o how_o utter_o unable_a we_o be_v to_o understand_v the_o word_n of_o god_n without_o the_o spirit_n of_o god_n if_o any_o one_o in_o the_o pride_n of_o his_o heart_n shall_v think_v by_o the_o strength_n of_o his_o gift_n and_o part_n save_o to_o understand_v the_o mystery_n of_o salvation_n he_o will_v find_v himself_o quite_o mistake_v for_o as_o god_n send_v the_o rich_a empty_a away_o so_o he_o will_v send_v the_o wise_a and_o the_o prudent_a ignorant_a away_o it_o seem_v a_o strange_a carriage_n in_o christ_n to_o rejoice_v in_o the_o spirit_n that_o god_n have_v hide_v the_o mystery_n of_o the_o gospel_n from_o the_o wise_a and_o prudent_a it_o be_v wonderful_a arrogance_n for_o any_o one_o to_o think_v he_o can_v know_v god_n without_o his_o leave_n whether_o he_o will_v or_o no_o or_o think_v to_o see_v god_n by_o any_o light_n but_o by_o his_o own_o he_o may_v as_o well_o see_v the_o sun_n without_o the_o sun_n one_o put_v a_o question_n why_o christ_n come_v not_o as_o moses_n or_o as_o a_o prince_n but_o in_o the_o form_n of_o a_o servant_n nor_o as_o john_n the_o baptist_n in_o a_o outward_a austear_n way_n but_o come_v eat_v and_o drink_v he_o be_v answer_v among_o many_o other_o thing_n especial_o for_o this_o that_o he_o may_v deceive_v the_o reason_n of_o man_n for_o have_v he_o come_v in_o the_o outward_a form_n and_o manner_n of_o a_o prince_n then_o humane_a reason_n may_v have_v something_o to_o build_v upon_o that_o he_o be_v the_o messiah_n outward_a mortification_n be_v in_o high_a esteem_n with_o the_o world_n but_o inward_a mortification_n and_o to_o be_v inward_o holy_a without_o proclamation_n be_v most_o sincere_a the_o second_o thing_n for_o the_o manner_n of_o your_o meditation_n if_o you_o will_v meditate_v aright_o be_v to_o come_v with_o a_o indifferent_a mind_n and_o take_v heed_n of_o bring_v the_o creature_n to_o your_o mind_n but_o bring_v your_o mind_n to_o the_o scripture_n and_o hear_v what_o the_o lord_n will_v say_v unto_o you_o three_o let_v your_o meditation_n upon_o scripture_n be_v very_o serious_a we_o be_v to_o know_v god_n as_o well_o as_o to_o love_v he_o with_o all_o our_o mind_n &_o strength_n we_o may_v do_v the_o thing_n of_o the_o world_n well_o enough_o and_o yet_o mingle_v many_o thought_n of_o god_n with_o our_o worldly_a employment_n but_o we_o can_v mingle_v the_o thing_n of_o god_n and_o the_o world_n together_o four_o let_v the_o end_n of_o your_o meditation_n be_v to_o raise_v holy_a affection_n and_o to_o have_v strong_a resolution_n for_o god_n then_o ever_o you_o have_v before_o not_o only_o to_o know_v more_o of_o but_o that_o we_o may_v have_v a_o great_a love_n to_o god_n or_o else_o it_o be_v not_o meditation_n but_o study_n chap._n xv._n several_a rule_n for_o the_o subject_a of_o our_o spiritual_a meditation_n 1._o the_o first_o rule_n to_o be_v observe_v in_o the_o choice_n of_o a_o subject_a for_o your_o meditation_n be_v this_o viz_o to_o choose_v those_o place_n of_o scripture_n to_o meditate_v upon_o as_o be_v most_o suitable_a to_o your_o master_n sin_n as_o if_o your_o master_n sin_n be_v pride_n choose_v those_o scripture_n to_o meditate_v upon_o which_o be_v most_o in_o speak_v against_o pride_n and_o set_v down_o god_n hatred_n and_o detestation_n of_o it_o or_o his_o severe_a judgement_n execute_v upon_o it_o and_o all_o his_o threaten_n against_o it_o as_o you_o may_v see_v in_o several_a place_n that_o set_v down_o the_o evil_a nature_n or_o effect_n of_o it_o and_o so_o of_o any_o other_o sin_n that_o be_v not_o thy_o master_n sin_n for_o it_o be_v of_o great_a concernment_n and_o a_o sure_a sign_n of_o sincerity_n to_o keep_v ourselves_o from_o our_o own_o iniquity_n thus_o you_o find_v david_n speak_v of_o himself_o that_o he_o keep_v himself_o from_o his_o own_o iniquity_n psal._n 18_o 23._o 2._o meditate_v upon_o those_o scripture_n which_o you_o find_v suitable_a to_o the_o dispensation_n of_o god_n providence_n as_o when_o the_o church_n be_v in_o danger_n of_o persecution_n then_o meditate_v upon_o those_o scripture_n which_o either_o command_n you_o to_o have_v or_o do_v commend_v the_o saint_n of_o god_n for_o have_v a_o sense_n of_o the_o saint_n suffering_n upon_o their_o spirit_n set_v down_o the_o place_n that_o make_v promise_n to_o those_o that_o be_v sensible_a of_o the_o suffering_n of_o the_o saint_n and_o also_o those_o place_n that_o do_v set_v out_o god_n love_n to_o his_o people_n and_o promise_n of_o support_n and_o deliverance_n to_o they_o in_o the_o time_n of_o their_o adversity_n meditate_v also_o upon_o the_o history_n of_o god_n deliverance_n of_o his_o people_n in_o their_o great_a straits_n and_o also_o of_o the_o way_n and_o method_n of_o his_o deliverance_n of_o those_o prayer_n also_o that_o prevail_v with_o god_n for_o their_o deliverance_n in_o such_o case_n 3._o meditate_v upon_o those_o scripture_n which_o be_v suitable_a to_o man_n personal_a providence_n as_o if_o thou_o be_v rich_a then_o meditate_v upon_o those_o scripture_n that_o set_v down_o the_o danger_n and_o the_o duty_n of_o the_o rich_a if_o thou_o be_v afflict_v with_o sickness_n poverty_n or_o disgrace_n imprisonment_n meditate_v upon_o those_o place_n which_o set_v down_o thy_o duty_n in_o those_o condition_n and_o those_o promise_n that_o set_v down_o comfort_n for_o thou_o in_o those_o condition_n meditate_v upon_o those_o scripture_n which_o set_v down_o the_o carriage_n of_o saint_n in_o thy_o condition_n and_o how_o god_n support_v they_o and_o at_o last_o deliver_v they_o 4._o let_v your_o meditation_n be_v upon_o scripture_n suitable_a to_o your_o temptation_n as_o if_o you_o be_v tempt_v to_o uncleanness_n as_o joseph_n be_v then_o meditate_v upon_o those_o scripture_n which_o speak_v against_o uncleanness_n it_o be_v fit_a to_o meditate_v of_o the_o heinousness_n of_o sin_n in_o such_o case_n and_o not_o of_o those_o scripture_n that_o may_v increase_v your_o temptation_n but_o of_o those_o that_o may_v remove_v they_o as_o a_o person_n under_o desertion_n be_v not_o to_o meditate_v of_o those_o scripture_n
late_a or_o my_o repentance_n more_o profound_a in_o the_o midst_n of_o this_o consideration_n i_o can_v hardly_o say_v but_o think_v with_o myself_o why_o shall_v i_o delay_v or_o refrain_v my_o enjoyment_n of_o god_n and_o be_o ready_a to_o say_v within_o myself_o the_o false_a joy_n in_o god_n be_v better_o than_o the_o true_a joy_n of_o the_o world_n these_o joy_n be_v too_o sweet_a to_o let_v go_v lord_n jesus_n when_o thou_o kiss_v i_o with_o the_o kiss_n of_o thy_o mouth_n i_o will_v kiss_v the_o son_n lest_o he_o be_v angry_a lord_n thou_o be_v too_o good_a for_o i_o if_o i_o may_v say_v so_o how_o can_v i_o ever_o expect_v that_o thou_o shall_v come_v near_o i_o more_o the_o poor_a love_n i_o have_v make_v i_o say_v a_o thousand_o world_n and_o a_o thousand_o heaven_n for_o my_o god_n the_o small_a beam_n of_o the_o light_n of_o thy_o countenance_n be_v so_o sweet_a lord_n if_o thou_o will_v but_o continue_v the_o joy_n thou_o sometime_o afforde_o i_o have_v enough_o i_o need_v not_o the_o comfort_n of_o the_o world_n to_o make_v it_o up_o nor_o fear_v the_o affliction_n of_o the_o world_n though_o one_o need_v continual_a supply_n comfort_n to_o support_v one_o yet_o they_o can_v not_o spend_v they_o meditat._n xliii_o i_o will_v go_v to_o god_n say_v david_n he_o be_v my_o exceed_a joy_n a_o sweet_a say_n o_o that_o there_o be_v such_o a_o heart_n in_o i_o yet_o i_o have_v a_o uninflamed_a heart_n a_o freeze_a heart_n if_o i_o leave_v all_o thing_n and_o myself_o i_o shall_v find_v thou_o but_o these_o poor_a joy_n of_o the_o world_n quench_v the_o joy_n of_o the_o spirit_n i_o shut_v out_o the_o glorious_a beam_n of_o thy_o heat_n and_o light_n and_o light_v up_o the_o candle_n of_o the_o creature_n which_o have_v neither_o heat_n nor_o light_n in_o comparison_n of_o thou_o when_o i_o go_v about_o to_o rejoice_v in_o thou_o my_o sin_n come_v and_o tell_v i_o that_o they_o must_v be_v mourn_v for_o first_o any_o thing_n lord_n any_o thing_n so_o that_o i_o may_v do_v what_o be_v please_v in_o thy_o sight_n i_o be_o willing_a to_o stay_v for_o my_o joy_n while_o thou_o be_v please_v to_o give_v they_o only_o i_o beseech_v and_o desire_v these_o three_o thing_n of_o thou_o 1._o that_o i_o may_v not_o want_v grace_n though_o i_o want_v joy_n 2._o that_o i_o may_v not_o go_v about_o to_o make_v up_o the_o want_n of_o thy_o joy_n with_o carnal_a joy_n let_v i_o not_o kindle_v a_o fire_n &_o walk_v and_o rejoice_v in_o the_o light_n and_o spark_n of_o what_o i_o have_v kindle_v etc._n etc._n 3._o that_o though_o thou_o have_v kindle_v joy_n yet_o that_o i_o may_v have_v sorrow_n that_o be_v spiritual_a lord_n how_o abundant_o good_a art_n thou_o to_o they_o that_o love_v thou_o i_o lie_v under_o the_o weight_n of_o thy_o love_n and_o thy_o joy_n when_o i_o come_v hungry_a and_o thirsty_a to_o 〈◊〉_d to_o be_v satisfy_v with_o thy_o joy_n to_o 〈…〉_z lie_v now_o as_o a_o ship_n upon_o 〈…〉_z while_o the_o tide_n of_o thy_o 〈…〉_z and_o lift_v i_o up_o and_o carry_v i_o into_o the_o ocean_n of_o thy_o goodness_n when_o mary_n magdalen_n stand_v weep_v at_o the_o sepulchre_n thou_o do_v call_v she_o by_o her_o name_n and_o she_o forget_v all_o her_o sorrow_n she_o leave_v her_o tear_n the_o sepulchre_n and_o the_o aâ—gel_n and_o cry_v out_o rabboni_n my_o heart_n make_v i_o believe_v that_o i_o will_v give_v the_o whole_a world_n to_o see_v jesus_n christ_n for_o i_o think_v if_o i_o can_v see_v he_o i_o shall_v lie_v down_o at_o his_o foot_n and_o beg_v his_o grace_n and_o he_o will_v not_o deny_v i_o this_o be_v part_n of_o my_o weakness_n and_o want_n of_o faith_n for_o he_o hear_v my_o prayer_n as_o full_o and_o be_v as_o willing_a to_o grant_v they_o now_o he_o be_v in_o heaven_n as_o if_o he_o be_v on_o earth_n lord_n jesus_n thou_o that_o never_o do_v deny_v any_o poor_a soul_n that_o come_v to_o thou_o for_o grace_n and_o pardon_n thou_o never_o send_v they_o empty_a away_o but_o grant_v their_o request_n have_v mercy_n upon_o i_o o_o lord_n my_o need_n and_o want_n be_v as_o many_o and_o as_o great_a as_o many_o and_o as_o great_a as_o any_o of_o they_o all_o and_o if_o my_o sense_n of_o my_o misery_n be_v not_o so_o great_a my_o misery_n be_v so_o much_o the_o great_a meditat._n xliv_o lord_n i_o perceive_v that_o spiritual_a sorrow_n and_o spiritual_a joy_n be_v whole_o thy_o work_n for_o my_o sin_n be_v as_o many_o as_o great_a and_o of_o as_o deep_a a_o dye_n as_o any_o in_o the_o world_n that_o be_v not_o the_o sin_n against_o the_o holy_a ghost_n and_o i_o be_o full_o and_o sensible_o convince_v of_o it_o that_o they_o be_v so_o and_o yet_o i_o be_o as_o senseless_a as_o if_o my_o condition_n be_v quite_o hopeless_a for_o be_v it_o not_o so_o can_v i_o possible_o be_v so_o fear_v as_o i_o be_o thou_o have_v say_v i_o will_v take_v away_o the_o stony_a heart_n lord_n if_o thou_o will_v work_v who_o or_o what_o can_v hinder_v my_o corruption_n and_o my_o sin_n have_v and_o do_v harden_v my_o heart_n by_o have_v and_o commit_v they_o nor_o will_v they_o soften_v it_o by_o consider_v they_o what_o hinder_v thou_o from_o take_v away_o the_o infidelity_n and_o stoniness_n of_o my_o heart_n if_o that_o hardness_n and_o infidelity_n do_v why_o that_o be_v the_o thing_n to_o be_v cure_v if_o i_o be_v not_o sick_a i_o need_v not_o a_o physician_n lord_n i_o say_v not_o this_o to_o justify_v myself_o for_o it_o be_v thou_o of_o thy_o free_a grace_n that_o must_v justify_v i_o for_o i_o be_o lose_v and_o so_o for_o joy_n and_o comfort_n though_o i_o read_v and_o hear_v of_o the_o comfort_n that_o thou_o pour_v out_o on_o other_o i_o be_o not_o move_v nay_o those_o very_a story_n and_o say_n which_o have_v former_o inflame_v i_o now_o be_v as_o spark_n fall_v into_o the_o sea_n warm_v not_o at_o all_o alas_o when_o i_o shall_v meet_v thou_o at_o the_o last_o day_n thy_o mercy_n they_o shall_v testify_v against_o i_o when_o they_o shall_v witness_v my_o sleighting_n of_o they_o my_o fruitlesness_n under_o they_o and_o unthankfulness_n for_o they_o what_o can_v i_o say_v alas_o my_o poor_a soul_n we_o be_v undo_v but_o that_o day_n be_v not_o come_v yet_o one_o hour_n more_o the_o lord_n it_o may_v be_v will_v give_v i_o come_v lord_n jesus_n come_v quick_o come_v into_o my_o poor_a soul_n for_o i_o be_o afraid_a to_o meet_v thou_o at_o the_o tribunal_n of_o thy_o judgement_n if_o thou_o be_v on_o the_o earth_n methinks_v i_o can_v go_v with_o confidence_n to_o thou_o that_o thou_o will_v hear_v i_o but_o now_o thou_o be_v in_o heaven_n i_o can_v bless_v be_v they_o who_o have_v not_o see_v and_o yet_o believe_v lord_n i_o have_v receive_v double_a for_o all_o my_o sin_n in_o respect_n of_o any_o profit_n or_o pleasure_n i_o have_v have_v by_o they_o i_o have_v have_v full_a measure_n press_v down_o and_o run_v over_o but_o alas_o my_o vexation_n of_o spirit_n be_v more_o gall_n than_o all_o the_o pleasure_n that_o i_o have_v have_v that_o have_v be_v worldly_a the_o loss_n and_o want_n of_o the_o discovery_n of_o thy_o love_n can_v be_v recompense_v with_o all_o that_o the_o world_n have_v thy_o love_n be_v better_a than_o wine_n indeed_o in_o respect_n of_o the_o offence_n to_o thou_o every_o prayer_n deserve_v hell_n meditat._n xlv_o lord_n i_o be_o as_o afraid_a of_o comfort_n as_o of_o terror_n for_o when_o i_o have_v comfort_n i_o be_o subject_a to_o pride_n myself_o in_o they_o and_o instead_o of_o have_v sweet_a thought_n of_o thou_o have_v high_a thought_n of_o myself_o affliction_n breed_v sorrow_n and_o comfort_n pride_n sorrow_n be_v better_a than_o pride_n my_o preach_n be_v my_o temptation_n and_o and_o my_o accuser_n if_o i_o preach_v not_o the_o strict_a way_n of_o god_n my_o negligence_n condemn_v i_o and_o if_o i_o domy_n sermon_n condemn_v i_o for_o my_o life_n be_v hell_n i_o be_o afraid_a of_o publish_v something_o i_o have_v by_o the_o help_n of_o thy_o spirit_n write_v leave_v my_o life_n shall_v do_v no_o more_o harm_n by_o scandal_n than_o the_o write_n shall_v do_v good_a by_o direct_v to_o holiness_n and_o yet_o sometime_o i_o think_v that_o if_o i_o publish_v and_o own_v such_o write_n they_o will_v be_v a_o strong_a engagement_n to_o live_v more_o holy_o but_o i_o have_v something_o against_o that_o also_o for_o that_o motive_n will_v in_o short_a time_n lose_v its_o strength_n such_o waxen_a wing_n will_v melt_v and_o let_v i_o fall_v to_o my_o former_a way_n and_o that_o holiness_n which_o be_v bear_v up_o with_o such_o
not_o this_o the_o act_n of_o a_o imperious_a whorish_a woman_n as_o god_n himself_o do_v phrase_n it_o ezek._n 16._o 30._o and_o do_v but_o read_v that_o chapter_n and_o you_o shall_v see_v whether_o you_o have_v not_o a_o buse_v all_o the_o blessing_n of_o god_n more_o than_o they_o do_v they_o spend_v they_o in_o honour_n to_o and_o in_o worship_v of_o idol_n and_o can_v one_o make_v a_o base_a idol_n in_o the_o world_n to_o fall_v down_o and_o worship_v it_o then_o one_o self_n 4._o let_v we_o consider_v what_o be_v the_o remedy_n of_o this_o sin_n 1._o consider_v how_o much_o hell_n there_o be_v in_o thy_o heart_n what_o a_o base_a and_o vile_a wretched_a nature_n thou_o have_v consider_v what_o the_o scripture_n speak_v of_o man_n in_o their_o natural_a condition_n and_o be_v sure_a the_o scripture_n which_o be_v write_v by_o the_o spirit_n of_o god_n do_v not_o use_v to_o do_v as_o those_o vain_a man_n do_v who_o when_o they_o praise_v or_o dispraise_v care_v not_o whether_o their_o expression_n be_v true_a or_o false_a so_o they_o be_v high_a enough_o and_o they_o rather_o strive_v to_o speak_v as_o much_o as_o they_o can_v as_o then_o much_o as_o they_o ought_v surely_n whatsoever_o the_o scripture_n have_v speak_v be_v make_v good_a to_o the_o utmost_a by_o those_o that_o be_v in_o hell_n and_o will_v by_o every_o man_n on_o earth_n do_v god_n withdraw_v his_o restrain_v sanctify_a grace_n and_o be_v those_o spark_n of_o hell_n fire_n that_o be_v in_o every_o one_o by_o nature_n blow_v up_o to_o a_o flame_n and_o heighten_v by_o those_o suffering_n that_o be_v there_o inflict_v 2._o consider_v how_o little_a good_a and_o how_o much_o corruption_n there_o be_v in_o our_o best_a action_n from_o what_o carnal_a ground_n and_o for_o what_o carnal_a end_n we_o perform_v our_o holy_a duty_n sure_o there_o be_v more_o sin_n in_o our_o best_a action_n than_o ever_o yet_o we_o have_v discover_v in_o our_o great_a abomination_n do_v but_o meditate_v upon_o those_o several_a consideration_n set_v down_o in_o the_o meditation_n of_o our_o sin_n &_o it_o will_v be_v a_o great_a preservative_n and_o remedy_n against_o pride_n last_o resolve_v with_o thyself_o never_o unless_o the_o glory_n of_o god_n may_v be_v thereby_o advance_v to_o speak_v or_o do_v any_o thing_n that_o may_v cause_v other_o to_o have_v high_a thought_n of_o thou_o or_o at_o least_o not_o to_o that_o end_n whatever_o good_a duty_n thou_o do_v whether_o of_o prayer_n or_o alm_n etc._n etc._n do_v they_o as_o secret_o as_o may_v be_v let_v not_o thy_o left_a hand_n know_v what_o thy_o right_a hand_n do_v though_o thou_o be_v exceed_o to_o be_v humble_v for_o thy_o sin_n because_o they_o offend_v and_o dishonour_n god_n and_o scandalize_v religion_n yet_o let_v not_o this_o at_o all_o trouble_n thou_o that_o thereby_o the_o esteem_n that_o man_n have_v of_o thou_o be_v much_o abate_v to_o conclude_v pray_v earnest_o as_o if_o thou_o be_v to_o pray_v for_o thy_o life_n for_o it_o be_v thy_o life_n that_o god_n will_v humble_v thou_o desire_v god_n to_o afflict_v thou_o or_o use_v any_o mean_n that_o he_o will_v sanctify_v to_o that_o end_n and_o when_o thou_o have_v finish_v thy_o meditation_n consider_v what_o passage_n have_v most_o affect_v thou_o and_o keep_v it_o in_o thy_o thought_n that_o by_o of_o ten_o think_v of_o it_o thou_o may_v be_v humble_v and_o make_v to_o be_v of_o a_o poor_a and_o contrite_a spirit_n that_o god_n may_v delight_v in_o thou_o and_o that_o thou_o may_v delight_v in_o he_o now_o to_o the_o king_n eternal_a the_o immortal_a invisible_a and_o only_o wise_a god_n be_v honour_n and_o glory_n for_o ever_o and_o ever_o amen_n meditat._n i._o of_o the_o end_n for_o which_o we_o be_v create_v preparation_n 1._o be_v convince_v of_o and_o affect_v with_o the_o presence_n of_o god_n 2._o desire_v of_o god_n to_o assist_v thou_o with_o his_o spirit_n consideration_n 1._o consider_v god_n do_v not_o create_v thou_o for_o any_o need_n he_o have_v of_o thèe_v for_o though_o thou_o shall_v do_v all_o that_o he_o command_v thou_o thou_o be_v a_o unprofitable_a servant_n to_o he_o but_o thou_o come_v wonderful_o short_a of_o do_v what_o god_n command_v but_o only_a to_o declare_v and_o exercise_v his_o bounty_n and_o goodness_n to_o thou_o in_o bestow_v upon_o thou_o his_o grace_n in_o this_o life_n and_o his_o glory_n in_o the_o life_n to_o come_v but_o as_o it_o be_v in_o deuteronomy_n plain_o set_v down_o thou_o shall_v love_v the_o lord_n thy_o god_n wâ—th_v all_o thy_o heart_n and_o all_o thy_o strength_n and_o all_o thy_o mind_n and_o to_o this_o end_n he_o have_v enrich_v thou_o with_o understanding_n to_o know_v he_o remembrance_n to_o be_v mindful_a of_o he_o will_z to_o love_v he_o imagination_n to_o represent_v his_o benefit_n to_o thy_o thought_n eye_n to_o behold_v the_o wonder_n of_o his_o work_n and_o a_o tongue_n to_o praise_v he_o etc._n etc._n 1._o thou_o be_v full_o convince_v of_o this_o thou_o will_v plain_o see_v that_o it_o evident_o follow_v which_o be_v the_o next_o thing_n to_o consider_v that_o whatsoever_o be_v contrary_a to_o this_o end_n that_o hinder_v thou_o in_o or_o from_o know_v love_a serve_a and_o enjoy_v of_o god_n must_v be_v avoid_v and_o abhor_v as_o the_o great_a mischief_n that_o can_v befall_v thou_o in_o the_o whole_a world_n 2._o the_o second_o thing_n that_o plain_o follow_v from_o this_o be_v that_o thou_o shall_v be_v little_a or_o nothing_o trouble_v for_o the_o loss_n of_o any_o thing_n which_o though_o thou_o lose_v thou_o may_v notwithstanding_o serve_v god_n thou_o may_v lose_v thy_o riches_n and_o yet_o thou_o may_v be_v holy_a therefore_o thou_o must_v not_o mourn_v nor_o grieve_v for_o the_o loss_n of_o friend_n of_o health_n etc._n etc._n 3._o nor_o must_v thou_o much_o desire_n and_o endeavour_v for_o those_o thing_n which_o no_o way_n further_o thou_o in_o this_o great_a business_n of_o know_v serve_a and_o follow_v god_n but_o they_o be_v to_o be_v account_v superfluous_a and_o frivolous_a 2._o consider_v the_o folly_n and_o madness_n of_o those_o who_o live_v no_o otherwise_o then_o as_o if_o they_o have_v be_v create_v for_o no_o other_o end_n then_o to_o drink_v and_o eat_v and_o sleep_v and_o dance_v and_o game_n or_o to_o get_v riches_n or_o such_o like_a foolery_n certain_o if_o these_o people_n be_v ask_v whether_o they_o do_v in_o their_o conscience_n think_v that_o god_n create_v they_o that_o they_o may_v spend_v their_o life_n in_o dance_v &c_n &c_n they_o can_v not_o say_v yes_o none_o can_v imagine_v that_o have_v any_o understanding_n that_o at_o the_o day_n of_o judgement_n god_n will_v ask_v they_o why_o they_o do_v not_o dance_v more_o and_o game_n more_o and_o gain_v more_o riches_n 3._o consider_v serious_o with_o thyself_o whether_o thou_o live_v suitable_a to_o the_o end_n of_o thy_o creation_n think_v with_o thyself_o that_o when_o that_o time_n which_o thou_o spend_v in_o eat_v drink_v sleep_a recreation_n visit_n vanity_n be_v take_v from_o thy_o life_n what_o a_o small_a pittance_n be_v leave_v for_o god_n and_o for_o the_o work_n of_o thy_o particular_a call_n nay_o thy_o sleep_a eat_a drink_v recreation_n shall_v all_o be_v do_v some_o way_n or_o other_o to_o enable_v and_o fit_v thou_o the_o better_a for_o the_o service_n of_o god_n but_o alas_o how_o seldom_o be_v it_o that_o thou_o have_v think_v of_o fit_v thyself_o for_o god_n service_n by_o eat_v drink_v etc._n etc._n nay_o how_o many_o time_n have_v thou_o make_v thyself_o unfit_a for_o god_n service_n by_o such_o thing_n now_o before_o thou_o go_v any_o further_o be_v full_o convince_v of_o these_o truth_n and_o if_o any_o scruple_n shall_v remain_v which_o can_v tho_o a_o man_n be_v but_o true_o rational_a argue_v and_o pray_v they_o away_o for_o though_o it_o may_v be_v some_o objection_n may_v be_v too_o hard_a for_o thy_o argument_n which_o notwithstanding_o seldom_o come_v to_o pass_v since_o thy_o consideration_n must_v be_v of_o truth_n so_o plain_a evident_a and_o obvious_a which_o all_o grant_n yet_o no_o scruple_n will_v be_v too_o hard_a for_o thy_o prayer_n affection_n 1._o be_v ashamed_a and_o confound_v within_o thyself_o that_o thou_o have_v live_v so_o contrary_a to_o thou_o own_o principle_n and_o that_o thou_o have_v mind_v that_o little_a or_o nothing_o in_o do_v of_o it_o as_o a_o thing_n by_o the_o bye_n which_o if_o now_o thou_o do_v but_o serious_o think_v of_o it_o thou_o plain_o see_v to_o be_v the_o main_a business_n of_o thy_o life_n say_v thus_o alas_o o_o my_o god_n what_o do_v i_o think_v of_o when_o i_o think_v not_o of_o thou_o what_o be_v i_o mindful_a of_o when_o i_o forget_v thou_o alas_o