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A49773 Concerning marriage a letter sent to G.F. and with it a copy of an answer to a friends letter concerning marriage, and some queries and his reply to the answer and queries and an additional to G.F.s reply containing 13 queries concerning marriage, also the manner how the parties intending marriage are to go together / published by Benjamin Lawrence by the consent and advice of friends. Lawrence, Thomas, 1645?-1714.; Lawrence, Benjamin. 1663 (1663) Wing L684; ESTC R31690 11,646 18

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place of waiting for Gods stirring and manifestation Gods stirring is the time for faith to act in what the light doth manifest whether to be kept secret or declared Hester shewed it not to her people nor her kindred for Mordecai had charged her she should not tell it hast thou faith have it with thy self before God Paul had revelations not lawful to utter and things to utter that some could not bear but when a word came to the Prophets from the Lord they did declare infallibly This saith the Lord and in the New Testament as the spirit gave them utterance and no otherways But Preachers and Professors since Antichrists rise and reign say Revelation is ceased and none now can know and speak infallibly as the Prophets and Primitive Saints did but learned men declare truths according to Scripture which is not true neither for all the learned men in the World with all their Libraries and learning cannot know one line of Scripture but by revelation of the same spirit that gave it forth and all that I have put this question to confess the same Note Now this Querie is ended let none question a year after whether particular absolute infallible assurance be but whether Do I live in it and am I diligent to attain and keep it to my comfort These Queries and Answers are to expel the confusion that may arise in many why some have assurance of faith in particulars and not others and not finding it ordinary by experience have denied infallible assurance wholly and that all who have had stirrings to seek God and wait for his Counsel might be certain and to stop the hasty proceedings of some not rightly qualified who though they profess truth yet endeavour to marry as the World do also to denote unto others who are tender their lawful liberty to marry in the Lord. Admonition 1. To the unmarried that they shut out all motions to marriage that are not of God 2. To the married that they be helps to put away all sin and witness the bed undefiled 3. To them that would have married and have had many offers but failed to consider whether they have not been ignorant or negligent of Gods stirrings and have followed carnal desires and self-ends the usual provocations to the Worlds marriages but to some that God will shew his loving kindness and favour there are two ends of such long delays in mercy 1 To break down and utterly destroy the body of sin and death from whence carnal lusts and self-ends arise 2. To qualifie them to receive his blessing to be married in the Lord to know Gods call Gods stirrings and Gods will concerning marriage by an absolute and infallible knowledge and assurance and so come out of the defilement and come to enjoy the honourable marriage But the Worlds marriages can never be happy though they have their carnal desires and self-ends in riches honours and pleasures c. Cain Cham Esau had riches honors pleasures Nations Cities Dukedoms and Musick Tubal-Cain the first inventer of Organs but Cain was a Vagabond out from the presence of the Lord C ham accursed and Esau lost the blessing and all of them and their seed enemies to Gods people to this day though they may abound in worldly wealth pomp and pleasures If any object in mans wisdom concerning this writing first witness in life what is here declared in words and try if that may not answer all objections The manner how parties intending marriage are to go together Concerning the manner see G.F. in his book concerning marriage whereof here are some particulars inserted First After the thing is known between the parties themselves before any thing is concluded let it be declared unto friends who are able in the wisdom and power of God to see and feel into it if they see the thing in the light and power of God to stand Then 2. Declare it in the meeting or meetings to which the parties do belong towards the end of the meeting by the parties themselves or some friend or friends as they are moved both parties being present 3 If any have to object against it then the matter be laid before friends the next general meeting appointed to consider of things relating to friends to see into it and end it 4 About twelve friends met together they may declare their testimony how the Lord hath joyned them there was a marriage in Canaan and Christ and his Disciples were called to it not married in a corner by one called a Minister for mony 5 A Certificate by friends may be then given of the day moneth and year that it may be recorded Rebecca's friends blessed her so the people and Elders blessed Ruth and so may friends do by words or silence as moved of the Lord. 6 As any is moved they may declare it to the Magistrate or in the midst of the Market to such parties outward dwelling if moved or they may not 7 The things that cannot be owned by all friends and have unity within the power and spirit of God may not be recorded Who comes together as it was in the beginning comes over the Jews Gentiles and Apostate Christians the honourable marriage and the bed that is undefiled T. L. THE END
contend against it affirming that none can be free from sin on this side the grave and not only live in sin but profess they must do so if such marry their marriage is of the World in the fall out of the power of God and his image not as God joyns and though they may be faithful one to another yet they are not faithful to God out of the doctrine of Scripture are in the defiled bed their children unclean 2 Querie Whether the marriage bed be undefiled whilst any kind of sin remaineth Answ He that believes hath passed from death to life and so from the sin and overcomes the sin Turn to G.F. Letter pag 2. lines 23.24 To know marriage as it was in the beginning before man fell is a state before defilement was lin 27.28 and such as live in sin and say they never look to be otherwise in this life are not they in the defilement is not all sin defilement is not their bed defiled and all that they do to the unclean all things are unclean though they may be faithful each to other concerning bodily act Here the honourable marriage of Gods joyning out of transgression goes over the head of the Worlds marriages of mans joyning in the sin though they boast and mock at the simplicity of truth and them that live in it 3 Querie What is the difference between such as can witness freedom from sin and do keep the enmity under and marry and others that do not only live in sin but are in enmity against them that hold there is freedom from sin Answ The first are of Gods joyning both in the image of God out of the fall again lin 1.2 overcome the sin and marry as others do not as passive as it was in the beginning before defilement was lin 18.19 others joyn in their own wills and affections out of the power of God and his image not as God joyns but as man joyns have trouble in the flesh cares differing children unclean and many sad effects which are incident to all marriages in the fall 4 Querie Whether children of Parents who are both or either of them out of transgression are conceived and born in sin or are they clean and holy Answ There is a state where the believing wife sanctifies the unbelieving husband and the believing husband sanctifies the unbelieving wife else were your children unholy but now they are clean which is through the sanctification which is through the belief he that believer hath passed from death to life and so from the sin and overcomes the sin lin from the 17. to the 27. Is it a small thing to consider or did Parents seriously weigh what their children do inherit from them in the seed it might be a motive to throughout sanctification to all tender-hearted Parents for their childrens sake Zachariah and Elizabeth both were just before God and John was filled with the Holy Ghost from his Mothers womb God created one man and one woman out of transgression Mal. 2. that he might have a godly seed to replenish the earth and subdue it 5 Querie Whether deadness and losing the condition be not the more incident to some minding marriage Answ All deadness and losing the condition comes in going from the power of God lin 21. 6 Querie Whether children may not marry without consent of Parents and whether Parents may not give or deny their consent to their children in marriage Answ In the beginning God made them male and female whom he joyns together let no man put asunder lin 10.11 no not natural Parents but give their consent then answered Laban and Bethuel and said This thing is proceeded of the Lord we cannot say unto thee evil nor good Also spiritual Parents give their consent Paul gave his consent to the Apostles Bishops Ministers any if need so require let them marry But such marriages as man joyns not as God joyns Parents may deny their consent Paul denied his consent saying Be not unequally yoked with Infidels Isaac and Rebecca denied their consent and Isaac said unto Jacob Take not a wife of the daughters of Canaan and Jacob obeyed his father and his mother Gen. 28.7 Obey them that have the oversight of you and submit your selves for they watch for your souls be obedient to such as have given themselves to minister to the Saints and to all that help with them and labour All Friends that intend marriage take counsel of the ministers of truth not conclude marriage first and acquaint them with it after but be obedient to Parents that your days may be long in the land and the earth may be repelnished with an holy seed that may rule in righteousness who are obedient to their spiritual Parents cannot disobey their natural father and mother who are not to force their children to marry against their consent the Parents and kindred called Rebecca and said Wilt thou go with this man and she said I will go 7 Querie Whether any may know Gods will absolute and infallible concerning their marriage as whether such a person be appointed of God to be a a fit help forasmuch as some have been so perswaded yet failed Answ To know marriage as God joyns is to know it as it was before man fell lin 1. a certain knowledge this is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh Adam knew Gods appointment Abraham knew Gods appointment and said God will send his Angel and thou shalt take a wife for my son from thence Laban and Bethuel knew Gods appointment and said This thing is proceeded of the Lord for this cause Gods wil manifest Gods appointment Gods ordinance shall a man leave father and mother and cleave to his wife Some marry in their own wills and say it is Gods will Can any be obedient to Gods will and not know it or not know it certain this the Worlds Preachers and Professors cry none is infallible say they what then do they preach for to make people doubt or what shall any hear such for that cannot tell certain Who abides in the light are in the unity joyned to the Lord are one spirit one in desire delight and sweetness one will what man wills God wills if ye abide in me and my words abide in you saith Christ ask what you will and it shall be done unto you delight thy self in the Lord and thou shalt have the desire of thine heart not in thy own but in Gods time The Jews after they did come out of Egypt did go together there might be something stirring of God at first lin 4.12 the state of the Gentiles and the Christians there might be something stirring from the Lord as particularly Hester lin 13. Jews Gentiles Christians Gods stirrings have been in all generations and all Gods stirrings are absolute and infallible and that of God in every one which Answers is infallible and when any one is restored out of the fall his assurance may be infallible also