forgiven him CHAP. VIII Of the oblation of Christ on the Cross and resignation of our selves The voice of the Beloved AS I willingly offered up my self unto God my Father for thy sins my hands being stretched forth on the Cross and my body naked so that nothing remained in me that was not wholly turned into a sacrifice for the appeasing of the divine Majesty so oughtest thou also to offer up thy self willingly unto me every day as a pure and holy oblation with all thy might and affections in as hearty a manner as thou canst What do I require of thee more than that thou entirely resign thy self unto me Whatsoever thou givest besides thy self is of little account in my sight for I seek not any gift of thine but thy self 2. As it would not suffice thee to have all things whatsoever besides me so neither can it please me whatsoever thou givest if thou offerest not thy self Offer up thy self unto me and give thy self wholly for God and thy offering shall be acceptable Behold I offered up my self wholly unto my Father for thee and gave my whole body and blood for thy food that I might be wholly thine and thou remain mine But if thou abidest in thy self and dost not offer thy self up freely unto my will thy oblation is not entire neither will the union between us be perfect Therefore a free offering up of thy self into the hands of God ought to go before all thy actions if thou wilt obtain freedom and grace For this cause so few become inwardly free and illuminated for that they are loth wholly to deny themselves My saying is undoubtedly true unless a Man forsake all he cannot be my Disciple If thou therefore desirest to be my Disciple offer up thy self unto me with thy whole affections CHAP. IX That we ought to offer up our selves and all that is ours unto God and to pray for all The voice of the Disciple THine O Lord are all things that are in Heaven and in Earth I desire to offer up my self unto thee as a free oblation and to remain always thine O Lord in the simplicity of my heart I offer my self unto thee this day for a sacrifice of a perpetual praise to be thy Servant for ever Receive me with this holy oblation of thy precious body and may this be for my good and the good of all thy People 2. I offer unto thee O Lord all my sins and offences which I have committed before thee and thy holy Angels from the day wherein I first could sin to this hour upon thy merciful altar that thou mayest consume and burn them all with the fire of thy love and wash out all the stains of my sins and cleanse my conscience from all offences and restore to me again thy grace which I lost by sin forgiving me all my offences and receiving me mercifully to the kiss of peace 3. What can I do with my sins but humbly confess and bewail them and intreat always thy favor I beseech thee hear me graciously when I stand before thee my God All my sins are very displeasing unto me I will never commit them any more but I bewail and will bewail them as long as I live and am purposed to repent and according to my utmost power to please thee Forgive me O God forgive me my sins for thy holy Names sake save my soul which thou hast redeemed with thy most precious blood Behold I commit my self unto thy mercy I resign my self into thy Hands Do with me according to thy goodness not according to my wickedness and iniquity 4. I offer up also unto thee all whatsoever is good in me although it be very little and imperfect that thou mayest amend and sanctify it that thou mayest make it grateful and acceptable unto thee and always perfect it more and more and bring me also who am a slothful and unprofitable profitable creature to a good and blessed end 5. I offer up also unto thee all the godly desires of pious persons the necessities of parents friends brethren sisters and of all those that are dear unto me and that have done good either to my self or to others for thy love and that have desired and begged of me to pray for them and all theirs that they all may receive the help of thy grace and comfort protection from dangers deliverance from pain and being freed from all evils may joyfully give worthy thanks unto thee 6. I offer up also unto thee my Prayers especially for them who have in any thing wronged grieved or slandered me or have done me any damage or displeasure and for those also whom I have at any time sadded troubled grieved and scandalized by words or deeds wittingly or at unawares that it may please thee to forgive us all our sins and offences one against another Take O Lord from our hearts all jealousy indignation wrath and contention and whatsoever may hurt charity and lessen brotherly love Have mercy O Lord have mercy on those that crave thy mercy give grace unto them that stand in need thereof and grant that we may be counted worthy to enjoy thy grace and attain to life everlasting Amen CHAP. X. That the holy communion is not lightly to be forborn The voice of the beloved THou oughtest often to have recourse to the Fountain of grace and of divine mercy to the Fountain of goodness and of all benignity that thou maist be healed of thy sins and passions and be made more strong and vigilant against all the temptations and deceits of the Devil The enemy knowing the great good and advantage which comes by the holy Communion endeavoreth by all means and occasions to withdraw and hinder faithful and pious persons from it 2. Some when they purpose to fit themselves for the holy Communion suffer worse assaults of the Devil For that wicked spirit as it is written in Iob cometh amongst the sons of God to trouble them according to his accustomed malice or to make them over fearful and perplexed that so he may diminish their affection or by subtile assaults take away their faith to the end they may either altogether forbear the Communion or at least come unto it but coldly But there is no heed to be taken of his frauds and suggestions be they never so filthy and hideous but all is to be turned back upon his own head Thou oughtest to contemn and scorn him a miserable wretch and not to omit the holy Communion for his assaults and the troubles which he raiseth 3. Oftentimes also an excessive care for the obtaining such a degree of devotion and some anxiety about confessing thy sins hindereth thee Follow herein the counsel of the wise and put away all doubt and scruple for it is an hindrance to the grace of God and prejudiceth the devotion of the mind For every small vexation and trouble omit not the holy Communion but the sooner confess thy sins and willingly forgive others
be specially beloved if thou be in great devotion and sweetness for by these things a true lover of virtue is not known neither doth the profiting and perfection of a Man consist in these things 3. Christian. Wherein then Lord Christ. In offering thy self with all thy heart unto the will of God not seeking thine own interest neither in great nor little neither for a time nor for ever so that thou keepest one and the same countenance with thanksgiving both in prosperity and in adversity weighing all things with an equal balance If thou be of such courage and so patient in hope that when inward comfort is withdrawn from thee thou preparest thy heart to suffer greater things and dost not justify thy self as though thou oughtest not to suffer these and so great afflictions but justifiest me in whatsoever I appoint and praisest my Holy name Then thou walkest in the true and right way of peace And thou shalt have undoubted hope to see my face again with great joy And if thou attain to the full contempt of thy self then shalt thou enjoy as great abundance of peace as this thy state of sojourning in this World is capable of CHAP. XXVI Of the excellency of a free mind which humble Prayer sooner gaineth than Reading CHristian Lord it is the work of a perfect Man never to slack his mind from the attentive thought of heavenly things and as it were to pass without care amongst many cares not like a dull sluggard but by the priviledge of a free mind adhering to no creature with inordinate affection 2. I beseech thee my most gracious God preserve me from the cares of this Life lest I should be too much entangled thereby And for the many necessities of the body lest I should be caught by pleasure And from whatsoever is an obstacle to the Soul lest broken with troubles I should be overthrown I say not from those things that worldly vanity so greatly desireth But from those miseries that as punishments and as the common curse of mortality do weigh down and hinder the Soul of thy Servant that it cannot enter into freedom of Spirit as often as it would 3. O my God the ineffable sweetness embitter unto me all carnal comfort which may draw me away from the love of eternal things and may wickedly allure me to it self by the beholding of some present delightsome good Let me not be overcome O Lord let me not be overcome by flesh and blood Let not the World and the short glory thereof deceive me Let not the Devil and his subtil fraud supplant me Give me strength to resist patience to suffer and constancy to persevere Give me instead of all the comforts of the World the most sweet unction of thy Spirit and in lieu of carnal Love pour into my Soul the Love of thy name 4. Behold Meat Drink Cloaths and other necessaries for the maintenance of the body are burdensome unto a fervent Spirit Grant me to use such refreshments moderately and not to be intangled with an over great desire of them It is not lawful to cast away all things for that nature is to be sustained But to desire superfluities and those things that are rather pleasurable thy holy Law forbiddeth For otherwise the flesh would Rebel against the Spirit Herein I beseech thee let thy hand govern me and teach me that I may not exceed CHAP. XXVII That private Love most hindreth from the chiefest Good CHrist. Son thou oughtest to give all for all and to retain nothing of thy self Know that the Love of thy self doth hurt thee more than any thing in the World According to the Love and affection thou bearest them so doth every thing cleave unto thee more or less If thy love be pure simple and well ordered thou shalt be free from the bondage of things Covet not that which thou mayest not have Be not willing to have that which may hinder thee and deprive thee of inward liberty It is strange that thou committest not thy self wholly unto me from the bottom of thy heart with all things that thou canst desire or have 2. Why dost thou consume thy self with vain grief Why art thou tired with needless cares stand to my good will and thou shalt suffer no detriment at all If thou seekest this or that and wouldest be here or there to enjoy thine own commodity and pleasure thou shalt never be at quiet nor free from trouble of mind for in every thing somewhat will be wanting and in every place there will be some that will cross thee 3. Not every external thing therefore attained and heaped together helpeth thee but it rather availeth if thou despise it and dost utterly root it out from thy heart which thou must not understand only of thy revenues and wealth but of thy seeking after honor also and thy desire of vain praise all which do pass away with this world The place availeth little if the spirit of fervor be wanting neither shall that peace which is sought abroad long continue if the state of thy heart be destitute of a true foundation that is unless thou stand stedfast in me thou mayest change but not better thy self For when occasion doth happen thou shalt find not only those things which thou soughtest to fly but a great deal more A Prayer for purging the heart and obtaining of Heavenly wisdom 4. Christian. Strengthen me O God by the grace of thy holy Spirit Give me to be strengthened in my inward Man and to empty my heart of all unprofitable care and anguish not to be drawn away with the sundry desires of any thing either mean or precious but to look upon all things as passing away and that my self do also pass away together with them for nothing is permanent under the Sun where all things are vanity and vexation of spirit O how wise is he that so considereth them 5. Grant me Lord Heavenly wisdom that I may learn above all things to seek and find thee above all things to relish thee and to love thee and to think of all other things as they are according to the disposal of thy wisdom Grant me prudently to avoid him that flatters me and to suffer patiently him that contradicts me For it is a great part of wisdom not to be moved with every blast of words nor to give ear to an ill flattering Syren for so we shall go on securely in the way which we have begun CHAP. XXVIII Against the Tongues of Slanderers CHrist. Son take it not grievously if some think evil of thee and speak that which thou wouldest not willingly hear Thou oughtest to judg the worst of thy self and to think no Man weaker than thy self If thou dost walk spiritually thou wilt not much esteem of flying words It is no small wisdom to keep silence in an evil time and inwardly to run to me and not to be troubled with the judgment of Men. 2. Let not thy peace be in the
are most necessary unto a faithful soul. 304 That he who is to communicate ought to prepare himself with great diligence 309 That a devout soul ought to desire with her whole heart to be united unto Christ in the Sacrament 312 Of the fervent desire of some devout persons to receive the Body of Christ. 314 That the grace of devotian is obtained by humility and denial of our selves 316 That we ought to manifest our necessities to Christ and crave his grace 319 Of fervent love and vehement desire to receive Christ. 321 That Man be not a curious searcher of the Sacrament but an humble follower of Christ submitting his sense to faith 324 THE FIRST BOOK CHAP. I. Of the Imitation of Christ and contempt of all wordly vanities HE that followeth me walketh not in darkness saith the Lord. These are the words of Christ by which we are admonished that we ought to imitate his life and manners if we will be truly inlightned and be delivered from all blindness of heart Let therefore our chiefest endeavor be to meditate upon the life of Jesus Christ. 2. The doctrine of Christ exceedeth all the doctrines of holy Men and he that hath the Spirit will find therein an hidden Manna But it falleth out that many who often hear the Gospel of Christ are yet but little affected because they are void of the Spirit of Christ. But whosoever will fully and feelingly understand the words of Christ must endeavor to conform his life wholly to the life of Christ. 3. What will it avail thee to dispute profoundly of the Trinity if thou be void of humility and art thereby displeasing to the Trinity High words surely make a Man neither holy nor just but a virtuous life maketh him dear to God I had rather feel compunction than understand the definition thereof If thou didst know the whole Bible and the sayings of all the Philosophers by heart what would all that profit thee without the love of God and without grace Vanity of vanities and all is vanity but to love God and to serve him only This is the highest wisdom by contempt of the world to tend towards the Kingdom of Heaven 4. It is therefore vanity to seek after perishing riches and to trust in them It is also vanity to hunt after honors and to climb to high degree It is vanity to follow the desires of the flesh and to labor for that for which thou mayest afterwards suffer more grievous punishment Vanity it is to wish to live long and to be careless to live well It is vanity to mind only this present life and not to foresee those things which are to come It is vanity to set thy love on that which speedily passeth away and not to hasten thither where everlasting joy is permanent 5. Call often to mind that Proverb That the eye is not satisfied with seeing nor the ear filled with hearing Endeavor therefore to withdraw thy heart from the love of visible things and to turn thy self to the invisible For they that follow their sensuality do stain their own consciences and loose the favor of God CHAP. II. Of the humble conceit of our selves ALL Men naturally desire to know but what availeth knowledg without the fear of God Surely an humble Husbandman that serveth God is better than a proud Philosopher that neglecting himself laboreth to understand the course of the heavens Who so knoweth himself well groweth more mean in his own conceit and delighteth not in the praises of Men. If I understood all things in the world and were not in charity what would that help me in the sight of God who will judg me according to my deeds 2. Cease from an inordinate desire of knowing for therein is much distraction and deceit The learned are willing to seem so to others and to be accounted wise There be many things which to know doth little or nothing profit the soul and he is very unwise that is intent upon other things than those that may avail him for the welfare of his soul. Many words do not satisfie the soul but a good life comforteth the mind and a pure conscience giveth great assurance in the sight of God 3. How much the more thou knowest and how much the better thou understandest so much the more grievously shalt thou therefore be judged unless thy life be also more holy Be not therefore extolled in thine own mind for any Art or Science which thou knowest but rather let the knowledg given thee make thee more humble and cautious If thou thinkest that thou understandest and knowest much know also that there be many things more which thou knowest not Affect not to be overwise but rather acknowledg thine own ignorance Why wilt thou prefer thy self before others sith there be many more learned and skilful in the Scripture than thou If thou wilt know or learn any thing profitably desire to be unknown and to be little esteemed of by Man 4. The highest and most profitable reading is the true knowledg and consideration of our selves It is great wisdom and perfection to esteem nothing of our selves and to think always well and highly of others If thou shouldst see another openly sin or commit some hainous offence yet oughtest thou not to esteem the better of thy self for thou knowest not how long thou shalt be able to remain in good estate We are all frail but thou oughtest to esteem none more frail than thy self CHAP. III. Of the doctrine of truth HAppy is he whom Truth by it self doth teach not by figures and words that pass away but as it is in its self Our own opinion and our own sense do often deceive us and it discerns little What availeth it to cavil and dispute about dark and hidden things whereas for being ignorant of them we shall not be so much as reproved at the day of judgment It is a great folly to neglect the things that are profitable and necessary and give our minds to that which is curious and hurtful we have eyes and see not 2. And what have we to do with Genus and Species the dry notions of Logicians He to whom the Eternal Word speaketh is delivered from a world of unnecessary conceptions From that one Word are all things and all speak that one and this is the Beginning which also speaketh unto us No Man without that Word understandeth or judgeth rightly He to whom all things are one he who reduceth all things to one and seeth all things in one may enjoy a quiet mind and remain peaceable in God O God who art the Truth make me one with thee in everlasting charity It is tedious to me often to read and hear many things In thee is all that I would have and can desire Let all Doctors hold their peace let all creatures be silent in thy sight Speak thou alone unto me 3. How much the more one is united within himself and becometh inwardly simple and pure so
much the more and higher things doth he understand without labor for that he receiveth intellectual light from above A pure sincere and stable Spirit is not distracted though it be employed in many works for that it works all to the honor of God and inwardly being still and quiet seeks not it self in any thing it doth Who hinders and troubles thee more than the unmortified affections of thine own heart A good and godly Man first of all disposeth within himself those things which he is outwardly to act neither do they draw him to the desires of an inordinate inclination but he ordereth them according to the prescript of right reason Who hath a greater combat than he that laboreth to overcome himself This ought to be our endeavor to conquer our selves and daily to wax stronger and to make a further growth in holiness 4. All perfection in this life hath some imperfection mixt with it and no knowledg of ours is without some darkness An humble knowledg of thy self is a surer way to God than a deep search after learning yet learning is not to be blamed nor the mere knowledg of any thing whatsoever to be disliked it being good in it self and ordained by God but a good conscience and a vertuous life is always to be preferred before it But because many endeavor rather to get knowledg than to live well therefore they are often deceived and reap either none or very slender profit of their labors 5. O if Men bestowed as much labor in the rooting out of vices and planting of vertues as they do in moving of questions Neither would there so much hurt be done nor so great scandal be given in the world nor so much looseness be practised in religious Houses Truly at the day of Judgment we shall not be examined what we have read but what we have done not how well we have spoken but how religiously we have lived Tell me now where are all those Doctors and Masters with whom thou wast well acquainted whilst they lived and flourished in learning Now others possess their livings and perhaps do scarce ever think of them In their life-time they seemed something but now they are not spoken of 6. O how quickly doth the glory of the world pass away O that their life had been answerable to their learning then had their study and reading been to good purpose How many perish in this world by reason of vain-learning who take little care of the serving of God And because they rather choose to be great than humble therefore they become vain in their imaginations He is truly great that is great in charity He is truly great that is little in himself and that maketh no account of any height of honor He is truly wise that accounteth all earthly things as dung that he may gain Christ. And he is truly learned that doeth the will of God and forsaketh his own will CHAP. IV. Of wisdom and providence in our actions WE must not give ear to every saying or suggestion but ought warily and leisurely to ponder things according to the will of God But alas such is our weakness that we rather often believe and speak evil of others than good Those that are perfect Men do not easily give credit to every thing one tells them for they know that humane frailty is prone to evil and very subject to fail in words 2. It is great wisdom not to be rash in thy proceedings nor to stand stiffely in thine own conceits as also not to believe every thing which thou hearest nor presently to relate again to others what thou hast heard or dost believe Consult with him that is wise and conscientious and seek to be instructed by a better than thy self rather than to follow thine own inventions A good life maketh a Man wise according to God and giveth him experience in many things How much the humbler one is in himself and more subject and resigned unto God so much the more prudent shall he be in all his affairs and enjoy greater peace and quiet of heart CHAP. V. Of the reading of holy Scriptures TRuth not eloquence is to be sought for in holy Scripture Each part of the Scripture is to be read with the same Spirit wherewith it was written We should rather search after our spiritual profit in the Scriptures than subtilty of speech We ought to read plain and devout books as willingly as high and profound Let not the authority of the Writer offend thee whether he be of great or small learning but let the love of pure truth draw thee to read Search not who spake this or that but mark what is spoken 2. Men pass away but the truth of the Lord remaineth for ever God speaks unto us sundry ways without respect of persons Our own curiosity often hindreth us in reading of the Scriptures when as we will examine and discuss that which we should rather pass over without more ado If thou desire to reap profit read humbly plainly and faithfully never desire the estimation of learning Inquire willingly and hear with silence the words of holy Men dislike not the parables of the Elders for they are not recounted without cause CHAP. VI. Of inordinate affections WHensoever a Man desireth any thing inordinately he is presently disquieted in himself The proud and covetous can never rest The poor and humble in Spirit live together in all peace The Man that is not yet perfectly dead to himself is quickly tempted and overcome in small and trifling things The weak in Spirit and he that is yet in a manner carnal and prone to sensible things can hardly withdraw himself altogether from earthly desires And therefore he is often afflicted when he goeth about to withdraw himself from them and easily falleth into indignation when any opposition is made against him 2. And if he hath followed therein his appetite he is presently disquieted with remorse of conscience for that he yielded to his passion which profiteth him nothing to the obtaining of the peace he sought for True quietness of heart therefore is gotten by resisting our passions not by obeying them There is no peace in the heart of a carnal Man nor of him that is addicted to outward things but in the spiritual and fervent Man CHAP. VII Of flying vain hope and pride HE is vain that putteth his trust in Man or Creatures Be not ashamed to serve others for the love of Jesus Christ nor to be esteemed poor in this world Presume not upon thy self but place thy hope in God Do what lieth in thy power and God will assist thy good affection Trust not in thine own knowledg nor in the subtilty of any living Creature but rather in the grace of God who helpeth the humble and humbleth those that are self-presuming 2. Glory not in wealth if thou have it nor in friends because potent but in God who giveth all things and above all desireth to give thee himself
our future amendment and proficiency in spiritual things CHAP. XXIII Of the meditation of Death THere will very quickly be an end of thee here therefore see what will become of thee hereafter To day a Man to morrow none and out of sight out of mind O the stupidity and hardness of Mans Heart who thinketh only upon the present and hath no more care of what is to come Thou shouldest so order thy self in all thy thoughts and actions as if to day yea this very moment thou wert ready to depart Hadst thou a clear conscience thou wouldst not greatly fear death It were better to avoid sin than to fly death If thou art not prepared to day how wilt thou be prepared to morrow To morrow is uncertain and how knowest thou that thou shalt live till to morrow 2. What availeth it to live long when we are so little the better by long living Alas length of days doth oftner make our sins the greater than our lives the better O that we had spent but one day well in this world Many there are who count how long it is since their conversion and yet ful slender oftentimes is the fruit of amendment of life If to die be accounted dreadful to live long may perhaps prove more dangerous Happy is he that always hath the hour of his death before his eyes and daily prepareth himself for to die If at any time thou hast seen another Man die make account thou must also pass the same way 3. When it is morning think thou mayest die before night and when evening comes dare not to promise thy self the next morning Be thou therefore always in a readiness and so lead thy life that death may never take thee unprepared Many die suddenly and when they look not for it for the Son of Man will come when we think not of his coming When that last hour shall come thou wilt begin to have a far different opinion of thy whole life that is past and be exceeding sorry thou hast been so careless and remiss 4. O how wise and happy is he that now laboreth to be such an one in his life as he wisheth to be found at the hour of his death A perfect contempt of the world a fervent desire to go forward in vertue the love of discipline the painfulness of repentance the readiness of obedience the denying of our selves and the bearing any affliction for the love of Christ patiently will give us great confidence we shall die happily Whilst thou art in health thou mayest do much good but when thou art sick I see not what thou art able to do Few by sickness grow better and more reformed as also they who wander much abroad seldom thereby become holy 5. Trust. not to friends and kindred neither do thou put off the care of thy souls welfare till hereafter for Men will sooner forget thee than thou art aware of It is better to look to it betime and do some good beforehand than to trust to other Mens courtesies If thou beest not careful for thy self now who will be careful for thee hereafter The time that is now present is very precious now are the days of salvation now is the acceptable time But alas that thou shouldst spend thy time so idlely here where thou mightest purchase to live eternally hereafter The time will come when thou shalt desire one day or hour to amend in and I cannot say that it will be granted thee 6. O beloved from how great danger mightest thou deliver thy self from how great fear free thy self if thou wouldst be always mindful of death Labor now to live so that at the hour of death thou mayest rather rejoyce than fear learn now to die to the world that thou mayest then begin to live with Christ. Learn now to contemn all earthly things that thou mayest freely go to Christ. Chastise thy body now by repentance that thou mayest then have assured confidence 7. Ah fool why dost thou think to live long when thou canst not promise to thy self one day How many have been deceived and suddenly snatcht away How often dost thou hear these reports Such a Man is slain another Man is drowned a third breaks his neck with a fall from some high place this Man died eating and that Man playing One perished by fire another by the sword another of the plague another was slain by Thieves Thus death is the end of all and Mans life suddenly passeth away like a shaddow 8. Who shall remember thee when thou art Dead Do do now my beloved whatsoever thou art able to do for thou knowest not when thou shalt die nor yet what shall befal thee after thy death Now whilst thou hast time heap unto thy self everlasting riches think on nothing but the salvation of thy soul care for nothing but the things of God Make now friends to thy self by honoring the Saints of God and imitating their actions that when thou failest in this short life they may receive thee into everlasting habitations 9. Keep thy self as a stranger and pilgrim upon the earth and as one to whom the affairs of this world do nothing appertain Keep thy heart free and lifted up to God because thou hast here no abiding city Send thither thy daily prayers and sighs together with thy tears that after death thy spirit may with much happiness pass to the Lord. Amen CHAP. XXIV Of Iudgment and the punishment of Sins IN all things have a special aim to thy end and how thou wilt be able to stand before that severe Judg to whom nothing is hid who is not pacified with gifts nor admitteth any excuses but will judg according to right and equity O wretched and foolish sinner who sometimes fearest the countenance of an angry Man what answer wilt thou make to God who knoweth all thy wickedness Why dost thou not provide for thy self against that great day of judgment when no Man can excuse or answer for another but every one shall have enough to answer for himself Now are thy pains profitable thy tears acceptable thy groans audible thy grief pacifieth God and purgeth thy soul. 2. The patient Man hath a great and wholesome purgatory who though he receive injuries yet grieveth more for the malice of another than for his own wrong who prayeth willingly for his adversaries and from his heart forgiveth their offences he delayeth not to ask forgiveness of whomsoever he hath offended he is sooner moved to compassion than to anger he often offereth an holy violence to himself and laboreth to bring the body wholly into subjection to the spirit It is better to purge out our sins and cut off our vices here than to keep them to be punished hereafter Verily we do but deceive our selves through an inordinate love of the flesh 3. What is it that that infernal fire feeds upon but thy sins The more thou sparest thy self now and followest the flesh so much the more hereafter shall
patiently for God the present evils of this Dost thou think that the Men of this World suffer little or nothing Look into the life even of them that live in greatest delicacies and thou shalt find it otherwise But thou wilt say they have many delights and follow their own wills and therefore they make small account of their tribulations Be it so that they have whatsoever they will but how long dost thou think it will last 3. Behold the wealthy of this World vanish away like smoak and there shall be no memory of their joys past Yea even while they live also they rest not in them without bitterness irksomeness and fear For the self same thing in which they take their delight is oftentimes unto them the cause of sorrow They have their desert who for that they inordinately seek and follow delights they do not enjoy them but with shame and sorrow 4. O how short and false how inordinate and filthy are all those pleasures Yet so Drunken and Blind are Men that they understand it not But like Dumb beasts for a little pleasure of a corruptible life they incur the Eternal death of their Soul Do not thou therefore my Son go after thy Lusts but forsake thine own will Psal. 37. Delight in the Lord and he will give thee the desires of thy heart 5. For if thou desire true delight and to be more plentifully comforted by me behold in the contempt of all wordly things and in the cutting off all base delights shall be thy blessing and abundant comforts shall be given thee And how much the more thou withdrawest thy self from all comfort of Creatures so much the sweeter and more powerful consolations shalt thou find in me But at first thou canst not attain unto them without fome sorrow nor without a laborious conflict Thy old custom will make resistance and thou must overcome it with another custom that is better Thy flesh will murmur but thou must bridle it with fervor of Spirit The old Serpent will sting and trouble thee but by Prayer he shall be put to flight and by profitable industry thou shalt stop the way against him CHAP. XIII Of the humble obedience of a Subject according to the example of Christ. CHrist. Son he that endeavoreth to withdraw himself from obedience withdraweth himself from grace And he that seeketh things private shall lose the publick He that doth not willingly and freely submit himself to his Superior it is a sign that his flesh is not as yet perfectly obedient unto him but oftentimes kicketh and murmureth against him Learn therefore readily to submit thy self to thy Superior if thou desirest to subdue thine own flesh For the outward enemy is sooner overcome if the inward Man be not wasted There is no worse enemy nor more troublesome to the Soul than thou art unto thy self not agreeing well with the Spirit Thou must of necessity have a true contempt of thy self if thou wilt prevail against flesh and blood 2. Because thou lovest thy self as yet too inordinately therefore thou art afraid to resign thy self wholly to the will of others But what great matter is it if thou that art Dust and nothing submit thy self to a Man for God when I the Almighty and highest Soveraign who created all things of nothing humbly submitted my self unto Man for thee I became the most humble and abject of all Men that thou mightest overcome thy pride with my humility Learn to obey thou that art Dust. Learn to humble thy self thou Earth and Clay and put thy self under the Feet of all Men. Learn to break thine own will and to yield thy self to all Subjection 3. Be vehement against thy self and suffer not pride to live in thee But so humble and submit thy self to all that every one may go over thee and tread thee as dirt of the Streets under their Feet Vain Man what canst thou complain of What canst thou answer foul sinner to them that reprove thee who hast so often offended God and so many times deserved Hell But mine eye hath spared thee because thy Soul was precious in my sight that thou mightest know my Love and always remain thankful for my benefits and that thou mightest continually give thy self to true subjection and humility and mightest bear patiently the contempt of thy self CHAP. XIV Of the secret Iudgments of God to be considered lest we be exalted in our good deeds Christian. Thou thunderest forth thy Judgments over me O Lord and shakest all my bones with fear and trembling and my Soul is fore afraid I stand astonished when I consider that the Heavens are not pure in thy sight If thou hast found wickedness in Angels and hast not pardoned them what shall become of me Stars fell from Heaven and what do I presume that am Dust They whose works seemed commendable fell into the lowest misery And I have seen them that did eat the Bread of Angels to be delighted with the husks of Swine 2. There is therefore no sanctity if thou O Lord withdrawest thy hand No wisdom availeth if thou ceasest to Govern No strength helpeth if thou leavest to defend No chastity is secure if thou dost not protect it No custody of our own profitable if thy sacred watchfulness be not present For if we be left of thee we sink and perish but if thou vouchsafest to visit us we are raised up and live We are inconstant but by thee we are established we wax cold but by thee we are enflamed 3. O how meanly and humbly ought I to think of my self how little yea nothing ought I to esteem it if I seem to have any good O Lord with what profound Humility ought I to submit my self to thy bottomless judgements where I find my self to be nothing else but nothing and nothing O unmeasurable weight O sea that can never be passed over where I find my self only and wholly nothing Where then is the lurking hole of glory Where is the confidence conceived of virtue All vain glorying is swallowed up in the deep of thy judgements over me 4. What is all flesh in thy sight Shall the clay glory against him that frameth it How can he be lifted up with vain words whose heart is truly subject to God All the world cannot lift him up whom the Truth hath subjected unto it self Neither shall he be moved with the Tongues of all his praisers that hath setled his whole hope in God For as for them that speak behold they all are nothing they shall pass away with the sound of their words but the truth of the Lord remaineth for ever CHAP. XV. How we are to stand affected and what we are to say in every thing which we desire CHrist. Son say thus in every thing Lord if it be pleasing unto thee let this be done in this sort Lord if it be to thy honor let this be done in thy Name Lord if thou seest it expedient for me and allowest it
to be profitable then grant unto me that I may use this unto thine honor But if thou knowest it will be hurtful unto me and not profitable to the health of my soul take away this desire from me For every desire proceedeth not from the holy Ghost though it seem unto Man right and good It is hard to judge rightly whether a good Spirit or the contrary drive thee to desire this or that or whether also by thine own spirit thou be moved thereunto Many are deceived in the end who at the first seemed to be led by a good Spirit 2. Always therefore whatsoever occurreth unto thy mind to be desired let it be desired and prayed for in the fear of God and with Humility of heart and above all thou oughtest to commit the whole unto me with resignation of thy self and thou oughtest to say Lord thou knowest what is best let this or that be done as thou pleasest Give what thou wilt and how much thou wilt and when thou wilt Deal with me as thou thinkest good and as best pleaseth thee and is most for thy honor Set me where thou wilt and deal with me in all things according to thy will I am in thy hand turn me and turn me again which way soever thou please Behold I am thy Servant prepared for all things for I desire not to live unto my self but unto thee and O that I could do it worthily and perfectly A Prayer for the fulfilling of the will of God 3. Grant me thy Grace O most gracious Jesus that it may be with me and labor with me and persevere with me until the end Grant me always to desire and will that which is most acceptable unto thee and best pleaseth thee Let thy will be mine and let my will ever follow thine and agree perfectly with it Let my will and nill be all one with thine and let me not will or nill any thing else but what thou willest or nillest 4. Grant that I may die to all things that are in the World and to love to be contemned for thy sake and not to be known in this world Grant that above all things that can be desired I may rest in thee and may quiet my heart in thee Thou art the true peace of the heart thou art the only rest out of thee all things are troublesom and unquiet In this very peace that is in thee the one chiefest eternal Good I will sleep and rest Amen CHAP. XVI That true comfort is to be sought in God alone WHatsoever I can desire or imagine for my comfort I look not for it here but hereafter For if I should alone have all the comforts of the world and might enjoy all the delights thereof it is certain that they could not long endure Wherefore my soul thou canst not be fully comforted nor have perfect delight but in God the comforter of the poor and the helper of the humble Expect a while O my soul expect the divine promise and thou shalt have abundance of all good things in Heaven If thou desire inordinately the things that are present thou shalt lose the celestial and eternal Use temporal things and desire eternal Thou canst not be filled with any temporal goods because thou art not created to enjoy them 2. Although thou shouldest enjoy all created good yet couldst thou not be happy thereby nor blessed but in God that hath created all things thy whole beatitude and happiness consisteth not such as is seen and commended by the foolish lovers of the world but such as the good and faithful Servants of Christ expect and the spiritual and pure in heart whose conversation is in Heaven sometimes have a foretast of Vain and short is all humane comfort Blessed and true is the comfort which is received inwardly from the Truth A Religious Man every where carrieth with him Jesus his comforter and saith unto him Be present with me Lord Jesus in every place and time Let this be my comfort to be willing to want all humane comfort And if thy comfort be wanting let thy will and just proving of me be unto me as the greatest comfort for thou wilt not be angry always neither wilt thou threaten for ever CHAP. XVII That all our care is to be placed in God CHrist. Son suffer me to do with thee what I please I know what is expedient for thee Thou thinkest as Man thou judgest in many things as humane affection perswadeth thee Christian. Lord what thou sayest is true Thy care for me is greater than all the care that I can take for my self For he standeth very totteringly that casteth not his whole care upon thee Lord so that my will may remain right and firm towards thee do with me whatsoever it shall please thee For it cannot be but good whatsoever thou doest with me 2. If it be thy will I should be in darkness be thou blessed and if it be thy will I should be in light be thou again Blessed If thou vouchsafest to comfort me be thou Blessed and if thou wilt afflict me be thou ever equally blessed Christ. Son Thus thou oughtest to be minded if thou wilt walk with me Thou must be as ready to suffer as to rejoyce Thou oughtest to be as willing to be poor and needy as full and rich 3. Christian. Lord I will willingly suffer for thee whatsoever thy pleasure is shall befall me I will receive indifferently from thy hand good and evil sweet and sowre delightful and sorrowful and give thee thanks for all that befalleth me Keep me from all sin and I will neither fear death nor Hell so as thou dost not for ever cast me from thee nor blot me out of the Book of life what tribulation soever befal me shall not hurt me CHAP. XVIII That temporal miseries after the example of Christ must be born patiently CHrist. Son I descended from Heaven for thy Salvation I took upon me thy miseries my own love and not any necessity drawing me thereunto that thou mightest learn patience and not grudgingly bear temporal miseries For from the hour of my birth until my death on the Cross I was not without suffering of grief I suffered great want of temporal things I often heard many complaints against me I bore patiently shame and reproaches for benefits I received ingratitude for miracles blasphemies for Heavenly Doctrine reprehensions 2. Christian. Lord for that thou wert patient in thy life-time chiefly fulfilling herein the commandment of thy Father it is reason that I a miserable sinner should shew my self patient according to thy will and for my souls welfare bear the burden of this corruptible life as long as thou wilt For although this present life be burdensom yet notwithstanding it is now by thy grace made very gainful and by thy example and the footsteps of thy Saints more plain and tolerable to the weak Yea much more comfortable also than it was in times past in the old Law
remember not that I have done any good but have been always prone to sin and slow to amendment This is true and I cannot deny it If I should say otherwise thou wouldest stand against me and there would be none to defend me What have I deserved for my sins but Hell and everlasting fire I confess in very truth that I am worthy of all scorn and contempt and it is not fit that I should be remembred amongst thy holy ones And although I be unwilling to hear this yet notwithstanding for the truths sake I will lay open my sins against my self that so the sooner I may obtain mercy at thy hand 3. What shall I say being guilty and full of all confusion I have nothing to say but this I have sinned Lord I have sinned have mercy on me pardon me suffer me a little that I may bewail my grief before I go unto the land of darkness a land covered with the shadow of death What dost thou so much require of a guilty and miserable sinner as that he be contrite and humble himself for his offences Of true contrition and humbling of the heart ariseth hope of forgiveness the troubled conscience is reconciled to God the favor of God which was lost is recovered Man is preserved from the wrath to come and God and the penitent soul meet together with an holy kiss 4. Humble contrition for sins is an acceptable sacrifice unto thee O Lord savoring much sweeter in thy presence than the perfume of frankincense This is also the pleasant ointment which thou wouldest should be poured upon thy sacred feet for thou never despisest a contrite and humbled heart There is the place of refuge from the angry face of the enemy there is amended and washed away whatsoever defilement elsewhere was contracted and whatsoever is polluted CHAP. LIII That the grace of God doth not joyn it self with those that savor of Earthly things CHrist. Son my grace is precious it suffereth not it self to be mingled with external things nor earthly comforts Thou oughtest therefore to cast away all hindrances of grace if thou desire to receive the infusion thereof Choose therefore a secret place to thy self love to live alone with thy self desire the conversation of none but rather pour out devout Prayers unto God that thou mayest keep thy mind in compunction and thy conscience pure Esteem the whole world as nothing prefer attendance upon God before all outward things for thou canst not attend upou me and be delighted also in transitory vanities Thou oughtest to sequester thy self from thy acquaintance and friends and to keep thy mind void of all temporal comfort So the blessed Apostle Peter required that the faithful of Christ should keep themselves as strangers and pilgrims in this world 2. O how great a confidence shall he have at the hour of death whom no affection to any Earthly thing detaineth in the world but the sickly mind is not yet capable of so retired a heart neither doth the carnal Man understand the liberty of him who is inwardly recollected Notwithstanding if he will be truly spiritual he ought to renounce as well those which are strangers as those which are near unto him and to beware of no Man more than of himself If thou perfectly overcome thy self thou shalt with more ease subdue the rest It is a perfect victory to triumph over our selves For he that keepeth himself subject in such sort that his sensuality be subdued to reason and reason in all things be obedient to me he is truly a conqueror of himself and Lord of the world 3. If thou desire to mount unto this height thou must set out couragiously and lay the Ax to the root that thou mayst pluck up and destroy that hidden inordinate inclination to thy self and unto all private and Earthly good Of this sin that Man too inordinately loveth himself almost all dependeth whatsoever is throughly to be overcome which evil being once overcome and subdued there will presently ensue great peace and tranquillity But for that few endeavor perfectly to die unto themselves and altogether to go out of themselves therefore they remain intangled in themselves and cannot be lifted up in spirit above themselves But he that desireth to walk freely with me it is necessary that he mortifie all evil and inordinate affections and that he should not earnestly adhere unto any creature by private love CHAP. LIV. Of the different motions of Nature and Grace CHrist. Son mark diligently the motions of Nature and Grace for in a very contrary and subtil manner these are moved and can hardly be discerned but by him that is spiritually and inwardly enlightned All Men indeed desire that which is good and pretend some good in their words and deeds and therefore uuder the shew of good many are deceived Nature is crafty and seduceth intangleth and deceiveth many and always proposeth her self for her end but Grace walketh in simplicity and avoideth all shew of evil pretendeth not deceits and doth all things purely for Gods sake in whom also she finally resteth 2. Nature will not willingly die nor be kept down nor be overcome nor be subject to any nor be subdued but Grace mindeth self mortification resisteth sensuality seeketh to be subject is willing to be kept under and will not use her own liberty she loveth to be kept under discipline and desireth not to rule any but always to live and remain wholly subject unto God and for God is ready humbly to bow unto all Men. Nature striveth for her own commodity and considereth what profit she may reap by another but Grace considereth not what is profitable and commodious unto her self but rather what is profitable to many Nature willingly receiveth honor and reverence but Grace faithfully attributeth all honor and glory unto God 3. Nature feareth shame and contempt but Grace rejoyceth to suffer reproach for the Name of Jesus Nature loveth idleness and bodily rest but Grace cannot be idle but willingly imbraceth labor Nature seeketh to have those things that be curious and glorious abhorreth that which is mean and course but Grace delighteth in plain and humble things despiseth not rough things nor refuseth to wear that which is old and torn Nature respecteth temporal things rejoyceth at Earthly gain sorroweth for loss is moved with every little injurious word but Grace thinketh on that which is everlasting and cleaveth not to temporal things she is not troubled with losses nor disquieted with hard words for that she hath placed her treasure and joy in Heaven where nothing perisheth 4. Nature is covetous and doth more willingly receive than give she loveth proper and private things but Grace is bountiful and liberal to all shunneth private interest is content with a little thinketh that it is more blessed to give than to receive Nature is bent to the creatures to her own flesh to vanities and to many vagaries but Grace draweth unto God and unto goodness