rejoyce in by an eye of faith fore-seeing it a forehand God gives a promise after that the thing so he delt with us by his Sonne first sent him in a promise after that in substance to be our life light and glory rest peace comfort and salvation in all wants and from all wants of all kindes and nature Well this Christ and God that sent him and the Spirit too is the Stream of sweetnesse where all your comfort lyes unlesse it be in the creature which withers like the grasse when it is cut and grows no more if creature comforts be cut off or withering one of these they are or else they are not momentany but induring which I am sure they are not from my own experience no more then a dreame which is but a fancy when the man awakes may fancies riches honours pleasures profits in the dreaming houre thou mayst doe the like and not enjoy at all what thou labourst for whilst thou seekest it in the creature runne thou mayst and win not seek thou mayst and finde not try thou mayst and taste not the sweetnesse thou expectest true some lyes in every flower but the Bee that skips from one to another all the Summer long can scarce fill her Hive but grant that she doe how quickly is she rebl'd and strangled too at last O thou 〈◊〉 Christian after pleasures profits riches lands and livings death will one day strangle thee and râ—b thâ—e to of all those sweet comforts thou ever gâ—therste here the Manna would not keep but in the pot of gold no more will the creature but in God and Christ and therefore what thou hast lay it up 〈◊〉 Christ and lay it out for Christ and the thou shalt be sure to finde it like bread upon the waters after many dayes but thou that seekest none and hast none but God Christ and the Spirit thou hast all already yea more then all the world ten thousand times can give thee for thou hast all All they seek and crave thou hast found in God Christ and the Spirit and hence it is that a poore Christian who hath Gods love Christs pardon and the Spirits seale can beare up his head and smile in his heart though purseless and penyless houseless and homelesse ragged poore and hungry in a chearfull way when many rich and great men complaine of a thousand wants whilst the true Christian in the sence of Gods love wants nothing but if some poore Christian 〈◊〉 as many there are wailing and weeping like to Hagar for want of this or that comfort a Wife a Childe estate pardon this or that comfort light or knowledge loe this seeming want is in thee only thou dost not see it for where Christ is all is and therefore look about thee yea look and if Christ bee in thee I dare say thou shalt finde more sweetnesse and drink too more delight out of this little Booke then in all the creature comforts thou ever yet enjoyest and therefore when the world is still and thy Spirit quiet in a leasure houre tast try read and if yee be deceived pardon me for I am a weake froward doubting Christian and yet I hope a growing though it be but slowly let us pray for one another for I will for you and the Israel of God while my name is William Blake A Word and but a Word to many of my fellow Christians who think they have no ability to raise write or speak to a portion of Scripture in a linct and profitable way for want of learning I dare say to thee whoever thou art if the Spirit of God be in thee lend him thy sleep or meditation when thy businesse of the world is ever and thy Spirit quiet he will feed thy thoughts beyond thy expectation I dare pawn my life for it these few lines was brought to my hand in this way and therefore try and see if William Blakes words be not true A STREAME OF SVVEETNESSE from the Spirits breathing Revelat. chap. 3.21 To him that overcomes will I give to sit with me in my throne as I have overcome and am set with my Father in his throne THis is the revelation of God by Jesus Christ unto John and therefore it is said blessed is he that readeth and he that heareth What this mystery or prophecie I blessed is that soul for ever as in the first chap. and the third verse In the seventh verse Christ saith he comes Amen saith the Bride come Lord Jesus quickly In the last of the Revelation and in the second chapter and the seventh vers To him that overcomes will I give to eat of the Tree of Life This tree is Christ and his leaves are for the healing of the Nations Rev. the 22. and the 2. v. And in the last of the 10 v. A Crown of life And in the latter end of the 11. v. A promise of no hurt by the second death In the 17. v. A promise to eat of the Manna that is hid This Manna was the sweet food that the children of Israel fed on in the Wildernesse Christ is this Manna but his sweetnesse is a hidden thing to the carnall world and in the 25. A promise to rule over Nations and further I will give him the morning Star this Star is Christ as Peter tels us saying Wait untill the day dawn and the Starre arise in your hearts In the 15. ver of the 3. chap. Christ tels his Church That he that overcomes shall be clothed in white array I then shall he stand with boldnesse before Christ when Kings and Princes shall cry to the hills and mountains to fall and cover them Revel the 16. And further I will not put out his name out of the book of life and in the 12. ver I will make him a standing Pillar in the house of my God and I will write on him the name of my God and the name of the City of my God and my name The name of my God that is he shall be so filled with his divine nature that it shall be as visible as a name in his forehead And now in the 21. ver which I first mentioned a further promise is laid downe as if Christ had not enough yet spoken to engage his Church against hers and his enemies namely the world flesh and devill Well according to my light I shall hint at the meaning of Christ in these words and first Observe The universallity of the promise it is a promise to him any him high low rich poor young old bond or free man or master maid or mistresse O but the world does not alwayes so one gaines the victory and another gets the honour or reward many times But secondly What is meant by overcomming surely to get the masterdome or upper hand with those we encounter with this masterdome is got two wayes by a Captain or a souldier by a Captain or a Champion so David engaged with Goliah and his slaying him
turnd to dust and must give account of this dust to Christ for he shall one day send them to all the winds to pick it up as himselfe speaketh Secondly I Iohn saw the holy City new Jerusalem descending down from God prepared as a Bride She descended or came down from God Observ Nothing comes up to God but that descends from God Flesh and blood saith Christ cannot inherit the Kingdome of God no it is a corrupt thing but corruption shall put on incorruption and mortality put on immortality but this incorruption and immortality too descends from above and therefore I saw her descending down from God the spirit and power of the mighty God may be the thing for which the Evangelist saith I saw new Ierusalem comming down from God out of Heaven But in the third place I saw new Ierusalem comming down prepared or trimmed like a Bride a Bride is trimmed or adorned with new or beautifull garments old spotred garments are ill beseeming the Bride and therefore she never doth aray her self but in lovely ones Well then here is according to my light the meaning of these words and I think the very naturall sence of the spirituall as I may so say or the spirituall meaning of the Spirit of God in these words I John saw the boly city the new Iernsalem comming down prepared as a Bride the righteousnesse of Christ Iesus God man imputed reckoned and given to man by God and put on by the mighty Spirit is the newnesse of it and the adornment of her and this righteousnes of God 2. Cor. 5. and the last yea it is the righteousnesse of God For he was made sinne for us who knew no sinn that we might be the righteousnesse of God in him Well by this mighty Spirit of God is Ierusalem arayed in this righteousnesse wrought out by Christ for her and so given by God for that same purpose namely Ierusalems adornment and now he beholding her in this he must needs say I saw her descending down from God out of heaven trimmed as a Bride When she is trimmed and arrayed by God Christ and the Spirit yea and she must needs be now lovely and Bride-like beautifull doth the spotted moon and twinckling stars adorne the cloudy element and make it so lovely that a David cries out O Lord how wonderfull are thy works Psalme 8. v. 3. then must needs Christ the Sun of suns and angels too to make his Ierusalem beautifull when he shall cloath her with his own righteousnesse as with a garment downe to the ground Ofriends this righteousnesse of Christ is the wedding garment of new Ierusalem and in this garment saith Iohn I saw her comming as a Bride trimmed for her husband Christ the King of kings Saints and Angels surely the kings daughter is all glorious without as well as within for her cloathing is all embroidered gold wrought out by Christ and put on by the Spirit O when the Saints shall wait on Christ up and down the heavens in this garment or righteousnesse of his how princelike will his attendance bee when ten thousands of these shall stand before his throne yea ten thousandmillions of these with as many Angels to them shall all as one joine to sing his victories over sin death hell men and devils in this garment of love and livery of his favour what sparkling beames will passe from one to the other like suns reflecting on each others glory yet all from Christ like Moon and starres in their horizon And now O thou poor and prodigall sinner what thinkest thou of that day when it shall be said bring hither the best robe and the gold ring for this my once lost but now found son O what a change will here be when the rags in which thou tendedst hogs shall be taken off and thou cloathed with thy eldest brothers garment brought thee will not thy change be like Ioshuahs in putting off his filthy garment yea truely will it if dust were turned to gold and common stones to jewels nights to dayes and falling Commets to fixed stars and then againe to beaming suns yet all was nothing I say all these changes were nothing to that change that Christ maketh with sinners when hee takes off their sins rags and righteousnesse and puts on his own righteousnesse on them and therefore well might John say I saw her trimmed as a Bride when he had trimmed her with his own righteousnes thou art comely in my comelines saith Christ to the spouse Well reader I hope in this interpretation that thou and I am one and doe agree that this is the beauty of the new Jerusalem that the Spirit means by wedding garment and beautifull adornment And mark because it is this she is trimmed with therefore is she said to be seen comming down from heaven as having none of this bravery but from God Christ and the Spirit Secondly I saw new Jerusalem comming down in an uniform manner shee came not tumbling nor dropping now and then a piece as I may so say nor in a scattering manner but I saw new Ierusalem the whole Church as one single person comming down from God the whole church is but one Bride as I may so say for Christ the Bridegroom neither doth hee look on her any other wayes nor should wee but we are like the silly country people who sometimes take the Courtier for the Prince and the lachey servant for the master so we many times take the son for the Bridegroom and the lasie professor who makes a fait show when as indeed he is but a beggarly time server and hath no true grace nor vertue for the noble and royall Christian though there be not such an outward show in respect of talk and perfection which I speak not against in a sincere heart but as I said before Christ counts his church but one and so the Angel invites saying behold ye the Bride the Lambs wife and so saith himselfe my love my dove she is but one the onely one of her mother And this may justly reprove many in our dayes who will distinguish the Church of Christ into as many parcels as are formes or judgements and congregations every one thinking themselves to be the true Church when as at the best they are but a piece of his Jerusalem as I apprehend and that for these reasons First Jerusalem or the Church of God though she consist of many Iewes and Gentiles called and uncalled yet in truth she is but one church or body of which Christ is the head Secondly every particular person of the whole Church of Christ being arayed and trimmed by God and Christ may be called by the name of one single person and so counted the Spouse of Christ Againe I saw new Jerusalem comming down as a Bride here he makes no distinction of bond or free high or low Independant Anabaptist Presbyterian this or that forme of fellowship but he saw all these as in one
that will come come Christ loudly calls you and the Spirit still invites you and the Bride would faine perswade you from her own experience that she hath of this river why will you not then come away and take the water of life you may have it if you will now take it freely so saith the Bride and the Spirit And now friends ye see what this river is how freely you may have it yea you I meane the worst of sinners come away then come away and drinke abundantly come I say for the name of God come and drink For the name of God what is that His goodnesse and his kindnesse his unchangeable goodnesse his transcendent goodnesse his infinite goodnesse O for this his goodnesse sake come and drink for the name of Christ come and drinke For the name of Christ what is that His love his love his bleeding love his dying love his living love his eternall love O for Christ his loves sake sinners come away for the name and sake of the Spirit come and drink The name of the Spirit what is that His freeing name his sealing name his comforting sweet name his leading name his pleading name sake come away O sinner in the name of God and for the sake of God Christ and the Spirit come and drinke O sinner I should invite thee too for thine own soules sake but what is that to God Christ and the Spirits sake but stay me thinks I heare one say what is it to drinke of this river of life First it is to delight your selves in it yea drinke for delight as well as for thirst O then ye sonnes of men why will ye not come hither that your soules might be delighted with draughts of living water Secondly yea drinke to quench your thirst O come and quench your thirst in this pleasant river yea quench all kinds of thirst in your soules your thirsts for profits pleasures and contents come quench them here for here you may and no where else men who have runne to creatures to quench their thirsty soules have found them all a lie and so will you too who run and call for creature waters to quench their feverish soules Thirdly ye drink to coole your selves come hither drinke drinke and then ye shall lay all your heates your worldly heates your lustfull heates your sinfull heats O thou laborious Worldling thy bottle will be empty what shall thy soul then do when death like night comes on thee I say what will you doe O me thinks I heare thee even crying out drink drink or else I die I die Why doe you not give me drink but let me thus lye burning and dying too for thirst of that which once was freely offered to mee but now cannot be bought with prayers teares nor cryes nor all my worldly riches which I once overvalued and thirsted after more then God Christ or heaven have you never heard dying worldlings thus complain surely you have why doe you not that are alive and living come then unto this river and drink of this same water and thee I would too who art heated with lust with burning lust of uncleannesse pride passion and such like fiery distempers burning in thy soul as if hell fire was already kindled in thee O friends those lusts which lye so secret smothering in thy soule will one day breake forth into dreadfull flames burning round about thee Have you never seen a dying sinner dispairing of mercy lie in the midst of these flames burning and dispairing and no friend able to bring him any comfort no not in the least Againe ye drink for comfort to comfort your hearts but poore hearts know this there is no true comfort but in God Christ and the river and unlesse you come to this river of pleasure this soul-comforting water of life ye shall live comfortlesse ye shall die comfortlesse and be damnd for want of it God hath decreed true comfort shall be no where but in himself his Son and river John 15.26 ye know Christ promised his Disciples a comforter and what was that Comforter I pray but the Spirit and the river mentioned O me thinks I might perswade you to this river a drop a drop of it will sweeten any condition art thou poore sick weak what aylest thou man take a drop take a drop of this river I will warrant you comfort but here I would invite and not discourage for a world such poor Christians that are heated with temptations and corruptions that they goe mourning and sighing by reason hereof and Satans temptations filling them with feares and doubts that they cry out like David O I shall one day perish by corruption and temptation such a corruption sayes one and such a corruption sayes another me thinks they grow stronger and stronger and I feare at last will be my ruine O my friend let me tell thee two things and doe thou remember them First no soule is damnd for the presence of sin but for the love of sin marke me I say it is not the presence of sin but the love of sin that damns My second word is this to thee O complaining sinner sinne flutters most when it hath its deaths wound as soon as Christs comes into our hearts he wounds sinne to the heart as I may so say by giving a sight of it a dislike and hatred to it Well thus Christ wounds sinne and it may be now sinne like some fowle whose necke is broken beats the wing and flutters as if it were alive well so doth sinne whose neck Christ hath broken in the soule beates the wing and fluters keepes more sputter now then ever Well friend remember these sputterings are the death pangs of sinne I the death pangs and be but patient thou shalt plainly see them to be no otherwise and therefore doe not fill thy heart with feares of ruine for it shall never be for thou like David shalt overcome Saul thine enemy I meane corruption but in the meane time come away to the river drinke drinke and it will strengthen thee and coole thee O but now me thinks I heare some soule say I would drinke with all my heart but I am an unworthy poore sinner O friend the more poore the more worthy to Christ art thou poore then goe to Christs doore he feeds the poore but the rich he sends empty away Againe Thou art unworthy What dost thou meane by unworthy Thou seest no reason why Christ should give thee the water of life nor the Spirit I beleeve thou dost not I verily beleeve thou art unworty in thy self and cannot see any reason why Christ should give thee the water of life But Friend know there is a worthynesse in Christ and so thou mayst be worthy or any poore sinner who layes hold on Christs worthynesse and so goes to the Father in the worthynesse of the Son for the water of life and the river But to be plaine with thee thou art indeed a proud
his river and therefore friend sit down it is midnight yet in thy soul if the day break and Christ the starre arise in thee thou shalt see this river yea the depth of it in some measure a depth beyond all depths thou ever metst withall Here one depth calls to another like the eccho to the voice Gods decrees and purposes answered by his Sonne These depths are clearly seen by looking into this river and if thy sight be strong indeed then thou shalt see the sonnes of men like precious stones and pebbles lying in the bottome from thence plummed up by Christ to swim a top as in a sea of pleasure Eightly a river is cool and bathing we go to rivers in Summer heats to cool and bath our bodies O come hither and bath your Souls your heated Souls heated with sinne heated with guilt heated with apprehensions too of wrath heated with Satan and temptations truly many a poore soul is heated by sinne and then chased by Satan for his sin so heard that his soul even fainteh well friend my advice is come unto this river for here thou mayest cool and bath thee Ninthly a river is alwayes moving and working so is the Spirit it is active in the souls of Gods people though sometimes not descerned I sleep but my heart awaketh saith the Spouse in the Canticles Thou art dead and dull in praier many times but the Spirit being wakefull sees thee and after chides thee for it sometimes thou art nodding in the creature but the Spirit wakes and jogges thee by secret calling on thee which if thou refusest to heare then he sayes little for the present but sends some afflictions to thee and if that do not do then he sends another and another every one sharper then the former and so makes thee heare to the purpose agine in the tenth place A river is reflective ye may see your selfe or shadowes in a river and by the Spirit you may see your self your face your souls your hearts your natures and affections the heart saith Salomon who knows it truly none but the Spirit and the Spirit dwelling in it therefore by the by Thou that sayest and complainest of a hard and sinfull heart sure it is the Spirit in thy heart that gives thee thus to see it and all its windings from God which are more then the doores of Solomons Temple Secondly it shows you your nature and corruptions which have more sinne in it then there is poison in the world sinne in nature is like an old running sore which cannot be stopped or if it be it breaks out again so sinne in nature stops pride and out comes covetousnesse stop that and out comes pride and prodigalitie stop up that and then back againe to old unwearied father worldling drunkennesse stopt does the like lust runs as long as it can in old filthy fornicators but when it is spent they turne to baudy talkers I have seen old carnall fellows laugh and wiker at their youthfull pranks in the feasts and Iunkets yea such as have had one foot in the grave poore miserable men did they know their own condition the reckoning they must give for every idle word and every sinfull action which Christ speaks in Matthew one thought one serious thought of that would strike us dead as Belshazzar that great King was at the hand-writing in the midst of his feast with his Nobles dinking healths in bowls of Gold his countenance fell his joynts loosened and his knees knockd one against another no more but remember this filthy sinner Thirdly it showes your affections and which way they stream and run a man by nature can never see how wide they run from God and Christ sometimes biasse drawn by a wife a child a husband sometimes by the world and the worlds pleasures profits which like two strumpets entises all not kept by Christ and as dangerously takes them as that strumpet Salomon acquaints the young man with and how her paths go down to hell Again by the Spirit you may see your name in the Lambes book your wedding robe and Supper with your rest and glory in the Throne of Christ O thou foolish man that spendest thy dayes in gazing up and down the world let me exhort thee to come hither for here 's an object worth the seeing and thou O Christian friend let me intreat thee also to looke into this river this clear and Christall river but stay a little me thinks I heare one say what is it to look into this river First it is not to look into your own light for that is blind and hath no reflection at all Secondly it is not to look with anothers light for that is as if you would look by anothers eyes but to be short if you would see this pure living river First come in Gods light to see and then ye shall see is it not a thousand better lights that will show you the greatest light a thousand candles cannot show the sunne nay a thousand torches nor a thousand starres cannot you must see him by his owne light or not at all but first look into this river by the light of God and then it will be a river of pleasure indeed unto thy soul all its streames will be pleasurable and glad thy very heart Psal 46.4 there is a river the streames thereof shall make glad the City of our God Yea all its turnings will delight thy soul Secondly Looke in this river by the light of Christ he is the true light that enlightens every man that comes into the world and therefore called the light of lights Iohn 8.12 I that is the right way indeed if ye mean to see if men will neglect God and Christs light then let me tell them they shall never see they shall never finde this well of life this river of life let them look their eyes out let them look their lives out wise men have tryed wise men strived but Oh alasse in vaine for they could never find it but rather more were blinded The Father shewes us the Sonne and the Sonne shewes us the Father No man knowes the Father but the Sonne and he to whom the Sonne reveales him no man knowes the Sonne but the Father and he to whom the Father doth the like So likewise the Spirit shewes the Sonne Behold the Lambe of God so saith the Sonne Behold the River of God as in this text and all the world cannot shew us the Father but the Sonne nor all the world cannot shew us the Sonne but the Father Behold this day saith God have I begotten him nor all the world cannot shew us the Spirit nor the River of life the Well of life nor the Fountaine of life but the Sonne therefore saith Christ Buy of me eye salve that yee may see Rev. 3. last v. How blind was Bartholmew till Christ came and opened his eyes just so was thy soule and is thy soule without Christ I am the light
laying choise and precious strong and stable foundation time and age out lasting foundation heaven earth Saints and Angels foundation Secondly It might be very well called new Ierusalem if you consider her builders old Ierusalem was built by Bricklayers Carpenters and such like crafts-men the choysest of them but thou O new Ierusalem by God Christ and the Spirit therefore art thou said by Paul to be made without hands wee looke for a City whose builder and maker is God thy Husband is thy maker the God of the whole earth shall he be called thy God and he onely none laid one stone in thee but he none found a stone but he no nor stick nor straw as I may so say for he found all in his own eternall purpose O saith God this and this shall be a stone to make me a Ierusalem where I will dwell for evermore but these I will not use throwing millions by which was as likely as any if he had pleased to use them to set his glory of But as God found all so Christ beares all We on him are built saith Paul as a spirituall house unto the Lord built by the Spirit for as God findes all and Christ bears all so the Spirit builds all by his Word and Prophets Fourthly Ierusalem was built for the honour of the Jewish nation but thee O new Ierusalem for the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ who will shew his glory in thee because his love is set upon thee yea thy very gates more then all the dwellings of Iacob Fiftly Old Ierusalems wals and gates was but common stone but thine O new Ierusalem are built of all manner of pretious stones yea thy very gates are pearle O glorious city thy wals thy gates are precious living stones thy pavements are pure Gold Revel 21.18 O King Solomon where is thy glory all thy glory was but a dark shadow of this glory O Ierusalem city of the great King which he hath built for his Jewels and by his Jewels and the Sons of Sion more pretious then choyse Silver to dwell with him Christ and Angels for ever and ever Sixtly It is called new Ierusalem in respect of her watchmen and keepers O Ierusalem God did once set watchmen on thy wals but did they keep thee nay they could not keep thee they could not save thee for thou wast raced even to the ground But thou O new Ierusalem hath God and Christ within thee Angels round about thee well may thy gates be open day and night Revelations the 21. all safety is in thee all protection round about thee who was wont to be frighted from fears within and dangers round about Seventhly in respect of her light thy light O Ierusalem was not to be compared to thine O new Ierusalem thy light was but sun moon and creatures light but thy light O new Ierulem is this sun Suns and glory Angels are the sun of thy Sun and God is the Sun of Angels and glory too O new Ierusalem the glory of this God in thee is the light of thee the increated glory the uncreated glory O Ierusalem that is thy light therefore is thy light the light of lights and the light of life too the glory of the Lord and of the Lambe in thee are the light of thee O Ierusalem therefore is thy light the light of lights and the light of life too Now thou shalt need light of sun and moon no more no more for ever thou moon give place unto the sun thou sun give place unto the Lambe and unto the Lord for they must shine and ye must out for ever and let them shine thy day throughout thy long and endlesse day thy nightlesse day thy time and age out-lasting day It is said Abraham rejoyced to see Christs day O ye seed of Abraham Isaac and Jacob rejoyce in this your day for it will make amends for all your nights your nights of sorrow fear and trouble your longest nights your darksome could and stormy ones yea David tells you so saying though sorrow endure for a night yet joy commeth in the morning I this morning hath a noon of joy in it this mornings dawning hath and when ye by its dawning see O then what joy what peace what hope what rest thou canst not tell but doest enjoy thy wish thy would thy onely wish thy onely would which when thou hast thou ever cravest just as the child which suckes and cries and craves but hath Eightly it is called new Ierusalem in respect of her glory thy glory was gates walles temple towers riches strength and numeration of people But for thy glory O new Ierusalem it doth more excell all this then ever Solomons did the poorest Pesant for this read the 60 of Isa Arise and shine for the glory of the Lord is risen on thee the full glorie the true glorie which Moses could not behold and live no man can see my glory and live saith God to Moses but to thee O new Ierusalem when darknes shal cover the earth with al the dwellers therein then shall the Lord arise upon thee and his glorie shall be set and seen on thee yea such a glorie which shall confound the world yea confute the world of madnes and folly the world hath never seen thy glorie O new Ierusalem but when it doth shame shall cover her face and for shame shall kings and princes call to the hills and mountaines to fall upon them O Ierusalem the Gentiles shall walk in thy light then shalt thou see and shine and be astonished at thy own glorie the seas shall convert her treasure and the Gentiles their riches to Midian Ephah and Sheba shall bring their gold and incense unto thee for I will saith God beautifie the house of my glory verse 7. The yles shall waight upon thee the ships of Tharshish shall bring their sons their gold and freely offer to thee because of the name of the Lord thy God the holy One of Israel hath glorified thee Kings shall minister unto thee therefore thy gates shall be continually open they shall not be shut day nor night verse 12. and those kings and nations that will not serve thee shall be utterly destroyed O when will kings and nations minde this prophesie till then they will never submit their proud hearts cannot submit to lick the dust of thee O Ierusalem as David speaks Psalme But they shall submit like Iosephs brethren yea they that did afflict thee shall fall down at the soles of thy feet and call thee Sion the holy One of Israel And whereas thou hast been despised so that men went by thee I will make thee an eternall glory and a joy from generation to generation and thou shalt suck the milk of Gentiles and the breasts of kings yea the breast of Christ as I may so say the King of kings in whose breast lies a sea of sweetnesse where you may suck and smack smack and suck I and so
and yet I dare say there are some sinners at whose doore Christ hath knocked twenty years by preachings teachings afflicting and admonishing by his word and his Spirit and by example too But what doe I speake of twenty yeares are there not some gray-headed sinners at whose doore Christ hath often knockt heretofore but now they are deaf and cannot heare and the things belonging to their peace are hid from their eyes as once from Ierusalems for whose misery Christ wept and so will ye over your own souls one day in flames of hell O me thinks I see poor souls sit looking on one another weeping bitterly for their folly in not minding Christs knocks when time was O saith the aprentise wringing of his hands with heart breaking sighs I was seven yeares in a godly family where my master prayed read and expounded every day by which Christ oft knockt at my heart and made me to resolve for to let him in but I was yong and thought it was too soon to hear him yet but I made account to do it when my time was out but Christ then did not knock or at least I minded him not for the world wife and children came upon mee that I did not once minde him And so another Bible-carrier doth much the like O saith he in these flames weeping I went twise every Sunday in the yeare to the Church with my wife and family heard-prayers took my booke turnd to text and proofes and had Christ knocking at my heart too but I know not how still I forgot all and Christ knocks too who at last left to knock at all but I went still to Church with my neighbours according to the custome with old father worldling who would alwayes talk of businesse going home and comming putting all good things quite out of my minde for which cursed be the time that ever I did see him for it may beels I might have minded something what I heard of there as well as many others whom wee counted puritanes because they would still be talking what good matter they had heard and how sweet it was talking of the uses but as we followed after wee laughing for to hear them goe conning over the sermon one to another all the way home not at all minding what he said to us but how he met with such a one and such a one and never minded once at all our selves like unhappy soules for which we must lie in the flames for ever to repent our folly and houle for our misery in not harkening unto Christ when the time was which never shall be more O saith wrinkled faced hypocrite in the flames at the bottome I deceived my self many an honest Christian too like a cursed wretch for I was a great professor seven years together in which time Christ gave me many a hard rap at the door of conscience for my hollow-heart sometimes telling me I was a masked sinner and had a rotten heart ayming at the world name fame credit all the while profession was in request going up and down with many honest Christians and would be talking with them in matters of religion for many by ends little minding Christs thundring knocks against such as I crying woe woe woe to the hypocrites Scribes and the Pharisees one that did love much to have preheminency though a great professor bearing sway and rule just like a Bishop over the Church of Christ lord and master-like saying he was chief and must be beleeved and obeyed in his forme minding this his owne selfe and interest more then the honour of his master or the good of poore Christians whom hee seldome went to visit without his doctors fee or the hope of a sermon if in case he died worth him five pound Woe woe to those that so neglect the Church of Christ and the poore Saints who sometimes lies in cottages and sellers where their worships will not come it is to mean a thing because they are masters and called Rabbi Rabbi which the true Disciple never aymed at But stay I had like to forget one sinner more where Christ hath long stood and usually doth yea longer then at any doore besides I mean the simple Christian or the ignorant Christian who knowes not right or left hand in religion more then his grandmother taught him bringing of him up according to the custome which their parents left them building their religion on the old race yet must still be called Christian for his baptisme sake which I speak not against but the mans ignorance which the Lord knowes I pitty for truely at these poore soules doore doth Christ knock many times but the soule is so simple it doth not know Christ when he knocks but gapes and stares on the Parson in the pulpit when it is Christ that knocks at the heart with life light and knowledge which is more worth then jewels crownes and kingdomes yea the gold of Ophir and the rich ships of Tharshish but poore simple sotted and deluded soule thou knowest not the want of this knowledge Christ and thy souls misery for want of knowledge And here mistake me not for I doe not mean unlearned men more then learned men for truely many of them which are great Grecians know not the A.B.C. in the new creature but by heare say poore simple souls how many such be there in the world doe you not know thousands that are cryed up for wise able men though not such great Schollers yet cried up for able men fit for Jewry Judge or Justiceship which I doe not speak against but honour yet I say I will take a young stripling in the school of Christ without an haire on his face shall winde him like a childe in the worke of conviction for sin Christ knocking at thy heart and the Spirits working in the new man and old and sound experienced things I say in these things he will wind your old sollid blades many Churchwardens who should be knowing men as well as Furre-gowned where Christ hath often knockt before ever that came on him but now he thinks it is enough to sit by his white rod in a majestick way with a black soule by cheating of the poor to feast his own ungodly gut with capon sack and claret till his belly be so swelld that Christ cannot come at his heart or seldom doth hereafter for for the most they turne drunkards not that I mean right blading cursed or down right drunkards but I mean in a dry way without any roaring by clubbing pot after pot and then an half pint and another to that with a point at the last to set the reckoning right and a gell of strong water to close up their stomake I am sure I know some that will sit with a coughing and spauling discourse from four to six from six to eleven with aserious discourse in a cavilere way of a turn that shall be but I do not know when and so they drink healths saying
Angels clothed with splendor from the God of glory And now what thinkst thou of it sinner if thou shouldst see a lovely Princes arayed and clothed in golden Tissue lac'd and trimm'd with Jewels it were a gallant sight but O alasse ten thousand of these were all but nothing to set off thy glory O arayed Saint by God and Christ in righteousnesse But when shall I have this glory saith the sinner quickly quickly Behold I come quickly Rev. 22.20 and will then give it thee and all that long for my appearance as Paul saith of his Crowne which he tels you is laid up for him and all that loves Christs appearance But thirdly I meane by Christs sweet knocks Christ telling thee of his Fathers counsell and purpose and of thy being wrapt up in this counsell and purpose of God like time between eternities O friend saith Christ my Father loved thee from all eternity and chose thee to him from all eternity a vessell for his own Glory Name and Fame that thou mights shew in ages to come the exceeding riches of his grace Ephes 4.5.6 O this must needs be sweet indeed for Christ to tell thee of a love before time and a love out lasting time yea all time and ages O when a sinner fits poring of this love in respect of person God the lover in respect of time before all worlds then saith he O Lord God what is man that thou art so mindfull of him and what am I but lesse then the least of all thy mercies as Iacob once said which was of old towards me And why me O Lord God a poore gentile sinner a runnagado sinner who had neither house nor home nor grace nor vertue but hell and sinne and cursed nature and yet thou lovest me more then all and chose me out of all my neighbours kindred house and family wherein were many sweet and many courteous many wise and many knowing but none but I chosen the youngest of them all the poorest of them all the sinfullest of them all yet I obtained mercy for his purpose sake O saith the sinner me thinks I even see how God rould me in his thoughts and all the sonnes of men too saying this shall be a vessell and this shall be a vessell and this shall be another but these I will not use throwing millions by which were as like as any if he had pleased to use them to set his mercy off but he refused both mighty ones and many and chose a little remnant of which my soule was one to set his love upon which hath no height nor depth but over-spreadeth all and leaves no roome to think the ground or reasons of it but onely free-grace which makes the soule still wonder and leaves him at a lost why he should be the man to be exalted so above his fellow creatures which are alike unto himselfe but for free graces sake which onely lookt on him and made him what he is which makes him stud and still to say it is God alone doth all according to his purpose But secondly I meane by Christs sweet knocks his acquainting thee with himselfe First In respect of his love which thou art by nature more ignorant of then ever Iosephs Brethren were of him who eate and drunke with him but knew him not to be their Brother till teares and bowels said it was he whom they unkindly sold The sinner doth the like full many a time by Christ when he comes to the heart and tels them of his dreames as Ioseph did his Brethren how they must bow to him and eke submit their soules unto his yoaks of love his sweet and just commands which thing they cannot away with but huncht him for his newes by greiving of his Spirit but Christ now makes a famine by wants and straights and knocks and brings them down by need to save their hungry soules which now doe see the need of Christ his love and righteousnesse which he cannot hide from them but by his sweet knocks acquaints them with his love himselfe like Ioseph with his bowels And in respect of his love which was and is beyond all loves Greater love saith Christ to the sinner hath no man then this to lay downe his life for his friend but mine is greater O unkind sinner an enemy to me who loved thee in thy blood and loved thee in thy sinne and hid thee from displeasure which thou once laidst liable too till I in love did free thee but this thou little mindest nor all my loves for many yeares together in hunger cold and wants in life in death still for thy sake And thus Christ acquaints the soule with his love by his sweet knocks and wider opens the sinners bowels then ever Joseph did his Brethren But secondly I meane by Christs sweet knocks his acquainting the soule with his lovelinesse as well as of his love which washed us from our sinnes in his blood Revel 1. v. 5. O saith Christ sweetly knocking at the sinners doore in a woing way Sinner sinner behold me behold me my locks are wet with the dew of the night Cant. 5.1 How long shall I knock and stand for pitty let me in I am the rose of Sharon the sweetest of ten thousand the Lilly of the vallies the fairest of ten thousand How canst thou chose but love me sinner Behold me behold me with the Crowne that my Father crowned me Proverbs And now for my own sake sinner with my crowne and glory let me in I am the fairest I am the sweetest that ever will come woing to thee how canst thou thus deny me O thou hard hearted sinner that ever I met with to stand me out so long who am the rose the lilly and starre of heaven too which twinkles day and night and darkens Sun and Moone which cannot come neere unto me I am so farre excelling for beauty light and luster and yet still undervalued by thee O proud and scorning sinner But yet behold me once againe and if thou canst deny me I will never try thee more nor shall my spirits strive with thee when as it is in vain and thus Christ acquaints the sinner of his lovelines by his sweet knocks But thirdly Christ acquaintes the sinner with his union O saith Christ I am Adam too yea flesh of thy flesh and bone of thy bone thy brother sister husband friend and father Matth. 12.48 49. Wilt thou deny all these relations and fall below nature then farewell sinner but I am still the same and cannot yet deny my self in no respect to thee O strange unkind and forgetfull sinner of me thy husband head and vine in whom thou livest as in thy root when once thou knowest these sweet relations which are more strong then death and sweeter too then sugred wines the honey or the honey-comb yea and the rose of Sharon the sweetest in the world But what my union is for sweetnesse it is for time and length and this I
for her husband but what is their grief or loss to thine unhappie sinner thou hast lost a father indeed or at least one that would have beene a Father to thee when time was in Iesus Christ yea a sweet and loving Father for them that have found him have found him so to be yea a Father as farr excelling all relations and Fathers too for sweetness as the universall sweetness does the single Pink. Men may talk of losses by wife and children husbands friends and Parents but all is nothing unto thine O unhappie sinner they have lost pebbles but thou hast lost a Iewell yea a God as farre excelling Iewels Crowns and Kingdomes as they for lustre beautie worth and sweetness love and lovelinesse excell straw and stubble chaffe and vanity Yea and lost it too for nothing which must needs cut the soul and split thy Spirit too when it thinks on it O saith a poore Soul I have lost the heaven of heavens for dust and ashes a few dying creatures saith the worlding and I too saith the wanton for my Dalilah this or that sinne which at the last betrayed me Iudas-like in-into mine enemies hands death hell and Devils where I must lie yea weep and wail and see no God no hope no help nor pity for millions of yeares as that young man the Apothecarie once said to his servant in his despair and horrour And if then too there were but any hopes to see God at last it would be some comfort but this everlasting departure and never seeing more is a hell to hell and a hell in hell to think upon which every carelesse sinner will one day find though he now makes a ship of God and thinks there is no danger of finding him or at least finding him when he needs he is so mercifull that if he crie but Lord Lord in a dying houre God is so near and mercifull that he will be straight found I will not lessen his mercie and say absolutely thou shalt not but friend let me tell thee thousands and ten thousands have found it otherwise witnesse Francis Spira and those despairing Sinners which thou seest daily dying so which would give a thousand worlds might they live a little longer O saith one in his burning feaver would I could live to see God a reconciled God in the face of Iesus Christ I would be contented to lie a thousand yeares in this Feaver and I too saith another in this Gout and I too saith a third with his bowells twisted in his belly which pains are all intollerable yet all would fain live in them to find a God before they die O foolish man O foolish sinner what shall I like thee unto but unto that simple man that built his house upon the sands of peradventure I hope and thinke to finde God when I die for all these Puritans be so stritkt though I take my pleasure and live in my sinnes and doe as my neighbours Mr. Custome and the rest well friend I will take thee at thy word peradventure thou mayst But wilt thou venture thy soule thy deare and pretious soul upon a peradventure O foolish sinner hast thou ever another soule to save if this miscarry dost not thou lose all and for a peradventure which may take and yet it is a thousand to one if it doth But with this parable before mētioned I shal conclude now for thy souls sake hearken to me whoever thou art that readest these lines this little book mind me for it is a truth and shall be so when thou and I am rotten that Christ is the rock yea the rock of ages and whoever builds on him shall stand yea stand and stand firme when the windes blow and whistle and raines fall like hailstones driven by the winde and the stormes beat yet thou shalt stand and stand firme in all these stormes and troubles and afflictions and temptations yea in death and judgement too shalt thou stand where millions yea and millious too shall fall whilst thou stands firme on thy rock Christ thy sure foundation and see the face of God too for thy comfort after all these stormes like the Sunne after an April shower or a haven after many weary leagues by day and night like Paul upon the Seas of Creet Acts 28.38 But how thou must build upon this rock know and let all the world know it is by the mighty power of faith wrought in the heart by the eternall Spirit of the mighty God and not by the workes which we doe or can doe by all created power Here followeth a briefe Exhortation which I gave in my owne house at my wifes Funerall to our friends then present FRiends and Neighbours I am beholding to you all for your love and loving presence at this time I have one request to you yea all of you which I hope no one will be offended at It is to joyn with me to speake a word to God after a word to you and to my owne heart which if I know It is not through pride nor any self-seeking end and could this Corps have beene conveniently longer kept I would have had Mr. Sedgwick whom she loved heard and profited by to have preached her Funerall Sermon But seeing it is as it is and my self am more concernd in this then all the world I take leave from you without any more request to you hoping you will take my meaning to be good where my expressions are short and broken for I had neither time nor a quiet mind but a few houres meditation last night when want of sleep had much besotted me But what improvement shall we now make by this my wife your sister friend and harmlesse neighbour Anne Blakes death And to improve it First see what is your end a grave a coffin wil house you all O call in then your thoughts your wide and wandring thoughts and mind your change with seriousness before it comes which will not be long you may be confident Secondly see what you yea all of you must part with at first or last your friends your nearest dearest sweetest friends your sons and daughters your wives and husbands O this grave and death will have them all which once I little minded but now I must and cannot but mind this death this cruell death which hath so haunted me and will doe you ere it be long but I hope he will not be so quick with none of you a sonne a daughter a loving wife in six weeks space O nimble quick cruell death how hast thou stolen my nearest sweet and dearest comforts Odeath where hadst thou this full and large Commission Was it given thee by chance O no I know it was not thou canst not take by that Commission a bird a sparrow much less a daughter sonne and wife O death this Commission it was from the Lord for he gives and takes Iob the first The Lord gives and the Lord takes and blessed be his name O
comming down as a Bride and now what shall I say of this Jerusalem comming down in her bravery First she is richly cloathed for it is in the righteousnesse of God which is sometimes called a decking or trimming with ear-rings or jewels Isaac trimmed Rebecka so and how lovely was she then in his eyes surely very lovely O when Christ shall look on his Rebecka trimmed with his righteousnesse as with ear-rings and jewels how lovely will she then be will he not then say Thou art all faire my love thou hast ravished my heart with one of thine eyes as Solomons songs 4.9 Yea she will ravish as I may so say the very heart of God to behold her in his Sons righteousnesse or bravery in the day of her espousals to him when she is thus cloathed as a Bride for Christ the King of kings O now who can behold any deformity in her she is invisibly cloathed and covered with his righteousnes from head to foot as I may so say FINIS Revel chap. 3.20 Behold I standat the doore and knocke and if any man hear my voyce c. I Shall very briefly hint at these words without any preface at all Behold that is a word seriously to consider 2. The Person I what I is it I the Lord of life light and glory 3. His Posture Behold I stand I the King of Kings and Lord of Lords O high and low great and humble Christ 4. the Place Where is that At the doore Behold I stand at the doore 5. Behold I stand at the doore not gazing up and down but I stand knocking for this end to see if any man will heare and open and then I will come in and sup with him or refresh him with my presence But first Behold this is a word never used in Scripture but upon some very serious great and weighty matter this word Behold in Scripture is like a fiery Beakon on a mighty Hill which is to give warning to all Inhabitants round about or like the silver Trumpet in the Law which was blowne to call the People of God together to the worship and service of God or like a Larum in the night to the Souldier which cries arme arme arme all or like an Ensigne or Banner which being displaid gathers all to heare and see For these reasons the Spirit useth it in Scripture Bhold a Virgin shall conceive and beare a Sonne and his name shall be called Jesus Behold the Lambe of God which taketh away the sinnes of the world John 1.29 Behold I come quickly Revel 3. And so in the last of the Revelations to which the Spouse saith Amen come Lord Jesus come quickly Secondly Take notice of his patience Behold I stand I the Lord of life and glory I the Saviour of the world I the Sonne of God the Lambe of God that was dead but am alive and live for evermore I that have this title on my thigh the King of Kings and Lord of Lords with the keyes of death hell in my hand binding loosing and remitting whom I please Thirdly His Posture he stands he sits not Behold I stand and knocke What is that wait for admittance which doth denote his humility and patience O humble Christ Lord of life light and glory King of Nations Saints and Angels how dost thou abase thy selfe to wait the sinners leisure If a great man should wait at a beggers doore how would men wonder Loe Christ waits at thy doore O beggerlesse sinner here is humility indeed Christ the King of Kings who hath ten thousand times ten thousand Angels at his heels waits at thy doore O gentle sinner did you ever see a Prince with his Nobles waiting at a beggers doore no I dare say no but heare is Christ the Prince of Princes waiting at the sinners doore whilst Angels and arch-Angels waits for a beck with all readinesse to doe his will and this they count their heaven too Princes uses to send their pardons to malefactors but Christ brings them and waits the sinners leisure too Christ seeing thou hast abased thy selfe God shall highly exalt thee above all the Princes of the Earth and Angels too in Heaven for to which of them hath he said Sit thee on my right hand till I make thy enemies thy footstoole O all must submit to Christ and therefore it is said At his name shall every kneee bow both in heaven earth and under the earth that is to say Angels men and Devils must submit or be disposed by his appointment to light life and glory or wrath hell or darknesse even which he please but it denotes his patience too as well as humility if men be not ready to receive courtesie we usally withhold them But Christ waits with patience the sinners leisure who is ever busie when Christ comes to him in his house or calling the pleasures profits of the world buying selling eating drinking marrying like the old world who could not all heare Noahs preaching no more then they at Christs knocks O Christ Why shouldest thou wait seeing the sinner is so carelesse to neglect his own welfare Because I am God and not man and my patience must be like my selfe farre above yours as the Heavens are above the earth so is my patience above all Men and Angels and if it were not so I should have no admittance no where for I come to no sinners doore but they make me stand and wait sometimes they doe not know me and sometimes they will not know me and seldome it is too they minde me unlesse it be in some great trouble sicknesse death or danger and then they cry help help with their bitter teares helpe O Christ helpe which many times I doe and after comes and sees them Doctor like when they are well and free but then they think I am paid by their old prayers and so will scarse admit me or desire me to sit down my company now is burthensome though once they thought it otherwise in their distresse and misery But O Christ thou art the desire of all Nations who would not desire and minde thee for thou givest Jewels Crownes and Kingdomes yea Life Light and Pardons to all that do admit thee but even the sinner mindes not nor knowes not thy gifts nor the richnesse of it or at least way see no want of pardon light or knowledge no if he did he would not stay so long waiting at his doore how long O Christ ten yeares at some and twenty yeares at others yea forty yeares have I waited till I was greived with them and swore they should never enter in unto my rest Well sinner happy is it Christ hath so much patience to waight thy leasure do not abuse this patience lest he leave thee and forsake thee and swear against thee by damning of thee for neglecting and abusing his goodnesse many poor souls are in hell now for this very sinne neglecting Christs patience standing at their hearts knocking for admittance
sinner thou art proud I say and art ashamed to have this water of life on Christs owne termes freely but wouldst faine buy the river by a worthynesse in thy selfe O let me see thee let me see thy face ô covetous man What wouldst thou buy Christs purchase over his head that is the plaine english of it get thee gone O proud sinner and come againe beggar-like with a Bottle and a Dish that is a a poore empty and unworthy soule this is the way man if thou meanst to speed for truly I think for a sinner to bring any thing of his own worthynesse to God and Christ is as great a sinne as thou canst commit this is an affronting sinne it affronts God and Christ as if they were sellers of the water of life which they can as freely give to a thirsty soule as raine to the thirsty ground What cost or charge or labour is it for God to raine downe showers to water the earth when it lyes gaping for it I say it is no charge or labour to God who hath his clouds and bottles full and a word from God and they straight shower down and doe not give over till they have satisfied the dry ground so truly can and will God raine down this water of life to a poore and thirsty soule gaping for it When the poore and needy cry for water and there is none I the Lord will heare Isaiah 41. But againe I say as at first this is an affront to God and Christ to bring any thing for a paile yea a soule full of the water of life it is the high-way to overturne his free grace which God will have exalted above the heavens and that it might be known in the earth he freely sent yea gave his Sonne unsought uncravd and will he sell the river thinke you that is purchased by his Sonne doe not thinke so it overturnes the glory of his free grace freely offered unto all that freely will accept it and this was Gods designe to make his glory known unto the sons of men which they have little minded I say the designe of God from all eternity was to set up his name his free grace in giving Christ the bread of life and the Spirit the water of life freely to the sonnes of men Iohn 6.48.32.33 and 48.9.10 Iohn 4.20.21 Iohn 7.37 O God delights to make all his attributes known his Justice Power Wisdome But the glory of his grace freely giving Christ and the Spirit This is that which especially he would have exalted in the world and the sonnes of men admire him in God would be admired for his bounty to give so like himselfe a Christ a River of life freely I say God thinks not much to give all this for the magnifying of his free grace that his bounty and himselfe might be admired and we the sonnes of men cry out and say who who is a God like unto thee that pardons iniquity by forgiving iniquity transgression and sinne giving life Christ and the Spirit freely Now I say this was Gods designe Before all worlds and for this designes sake even the glory of his grace Iohn 3. v. 16. he gives his Sonne and Spirit freely Now when a Soul will not come to God nor accept of God his Sonne the Spirit freely but would bring some kind of worthynesse for his Sonne and river thou overturnest this grace shearly overturnest it O what a fearfull thing is this to buy Christs river I tell thee thou buying Christian Christ will not sell one drop for Iewels Gold nor Silver for he bought to give and thou talkst of buying by so much repentance tears and I know not what O but now me thinks I heare some poore soule say I see no worthynesse in my selfe neither looke I after a worthynesse or expect to have a drop of the river of life for any worthynesse of my owne I loath my selfe and condemne my selfe for I finde my selfe wholly carnall fold under sinne and in the selfe condemning way have I like a Beggar waited at Christs doore for the bread and water of life praying and craving Christ for it night and day but I am still unserved and yet I see thousands served who have not waited half so long as I. Well friend Beggers must be so served that they may learne how to wait if you give a Beggar he like a Fidler straight is gone and many have served Christ so sometimes for a creature comfort for a supply of helpe in time of need for a wife for a childe sometimes given by Christ sometimes spared by Christ from death in sicknesse which as soon as Christ hath given them they straight runne away and scarce say I thank you Christ but runne straight away till they know not what to doe for another such like Almes and Friend many serve Christ so for the river of life O they would faine have the water of life and are night and day at Christs doore by prayers sermons c. When Christ hath once served them with a prettie deale of assurance about the river and their soules these beggars straight are gone away into the worlds cares and pleasures where Christ heares no more of them for the river nor nothing else a long time after but this Christ takes very unkindly from them that they should as soon as ever their own turn is served by Christ come no more at Christ till some great necessitie even drives them and it may be Christ sees thee that thou wouldst serve him so too and therefore makes thee wait a little a little do you call it when I have waited whilst many have been served and some that I know very well but I am still unserved Wel friend do not be angry if Christ makes the last first the first last by this they all learn to wait Christs leasure which is a lesson he wil teach his poore who beg for the bread of life the river of life and such things I say he will learne them all I all to wait his leasure first or last But stay my friend it may be thou art served already I have seen beggars well served and yet begging presently after as if they were starved it may be thou doest do so about the river let me ask thee one question and answer me truely have you never had no bread nor water from Christ at no time Yes I must confesse the truth and will seeing you put me to it I was one time very earnestly begging in my closet all alone by prayer and then Christ indeed gave me a good draught of the water of life the bread of life I mean the Spirit which satisfied me for two or three dayes and made my heart very lightsom and chearfull And I will tell you of another time when I was at a sermon where I got a sup and a bit too for he was speaking how freely Christ did give poore sinners the river of life the well of life the
Spirit inviting thirsty sinners crying come come to me ye weary sinners ye thirsty sinners and so forth and then he was speaking of that of Mat. 5. v. 3 4. Blessed are they that thirst for Christ and mourne for sinne which my soul then did and truely this proved a great deal of comfort to mee But I remember many a time besides this I have had much comfort by the word when ministers have clearly opened the Gospel-promises but sometimes yea many times I hear such sweet Gospel-texts and precious things held from them which hath filled me even as with marrow and fatnesse and I haue even thought with my selfe all these comforts held forth by them belong to mee But as soone as hee had held forth his comforts now saith he I will give you some markes and signes how a poore soule may know this belongs to him I remember I gave great attention to him but before he had done with his marks and signes I had lost my comfort againe by thinking none of it belongs to me for I had not so repented me of my sins as he shewed me True repentance there to be which he said was a turning from all sinne to Christ and a forsaking of all my sinne for Christ and a sorrow for all my sinnes by which I had dishonoured Christ This one mark he did so abundantly branch out that before hee had done with this one mark and signe of that sinner to whom this comfort belongs I had lost my comfort I am sure but he went to twenty more marks and signes I think and at last said if these marks and fignes be in you then these comforts belong unto you but if they be not then you deceive your selves but in the conclusion he said indeed if wee would repent and wash away our sinnes by that like David forsake all our sinnes and bring our whole hearts to Christ and denie the world the pleasures and profits of the world and abundance more which I cannot now stand to name but all this I am sure he bad me and others to do before we did presume to lay hold of any comfort so that whereas I was in hopes of being comforted I was not but rather cast down but at some other time Christ served me freely with comfort from his word for which I blesse his name and thus I have told you what comfort Christ hath given me ere now But yet I will tell you of one or two wayes more by which Christ uses to come and serve mee with comfort giving the water of life to mee One way in Christian meetings commonly called conventicles heretofore but I have in these meetings found much of Christ and comfort to my poore soule at our last meeting I think there was some twenty of us all met in a friends house purposely to discourse of Christ and wait on Christ expecting all comfort from Christ and whilst we were speaking and discoursing of Christ in that place I think verily we were every one refreshed onely by telling how Christ useth to serve us sometimes presently and sometimes not at all but seemed to be angry with us for asking some carnall things so at last wee found many things Christ would never grant to any of us but rather seemed to frown upon us for asking some things which we had all been a craving of him so at that time we considered what might be got by begging and parted but this I do remember a scoffing Ishmael called it a tub preaching And one time which I shall never forget I was walking all alone by Christs doore in a way of meditation of his bounty love and franknesse to such poore fellowes as I and while I was walking thinking nothing God knows Christ stept out and puld me in set me down and himself by me and supt with me we had whole flagons of wine then of which I drank very freely and I dare say I shall never forget this bout So the next day I told half a dozen Christians waiting at Christs door in a sermon how I had sped the day before they bade me thank God saying they had never such good fortune nor such discoveries of Christs love Friend friend I rejoyce to heare these sweet relations of your experience but let me tell you I am ashamed and so may you well be but however I am to think how you complaind nay murmured but now and said Christ had never served you of the water of life but you had waited so long and so long and I cannot tell how long you made me beleeve how Christ had served thousands and not you Friend I am ashamed to thinke how you have abused Christ by your false complaints of Christ surely it is a great sinne in you I pray doe so no more But now mee thinks I heare one say but I am a poore thirsty soule I doe not know when in prayer sermon christian conference either I was so refreshed and therefore what would you have me doe who am even scorcht with heat and thirst I thirst for Christ and would rather have him then the world a thousand times if I know my own heart What would you have me doe dost thou say Let me tell thee first how well I like this complaint of thine Surely by this complaint of thine and the high prising of this river it doth argue his streames strongly running in thy soule Yea let me tell thee my thoughts This I doe beleeve t is from the presence of Christ and the Spirit in the soule that any soule living is drawne forth to desire Christ or the Spirit you know the naturall man desires not the things of God but is dead to every good worke or desire and sure cannot indeed desire any thing in a spirituall way before God workes it in his soule Now friend if God or Christ hath wrought a strong desire after the well of life the river of life the spirit let me tell thee I verily beleeve he hath given it thee already for this desire in thy soule is to me a strong evidence of it I for my part doe firmly conclude when I heare any soule complaine for want of Christ and the Spirit saying of Christ and the Spirit his soule had rather have Christ and the Spirit then all the pleasures profits of the world I say I doe conclude this to be the work of God in the soule This is true a naturall man may have a heart quame and a heart wish to die the death of the righteous as wicked Balaam once said O that I might die the death of the righteous and that my last end may be like theirs I say A wicked man may desire to bee ownd of Christ nay more to give all the world for Christ at the last hower when they come to see a necessity and their souls damn'd for want of Christ O how will a carnall man dying mourn and beg and cry for Christ and howl for Christ too