Spirit inviting thirsty sinners crying come come to me ye weary sinners ye thirsty sinners and so forth and then he was speaking of that of Mat. 5. v. 3 4. Blessed are they that thirst for Christ and mourne for sinne which my soul then did and truely this proved a great deal of comfort to mee But I remember many a time besides this I have had much comfort by the word when ministers have clearly opened the Gospel-promises but sometimes yea many times I hear such sweet Gospel-texts and precious things held from them which hath filled me even as with marrow and fatnesse and I haue even thought with my selfe all these comforts held forth by them belong to mee But as soone as hee had held forth his comforts now saith he I will give you some markes and signes how a poore soule may know this belongs to him I remember I gave great attention to him but before he had done with his marks and signes I had lost my comfort againe by thinking none of it belongs to me for I had not so repented me of my sins as he shewed me True repentance there to be which he said was a turning from all sinne to Christ and a forsaking of all my sinne for Christ and a sorrow for all my sinnes by which I had dishonoured Christ This one mark he did so abundantly branch out that before hee had done with this one mark and signe of that sinner to whom this comfort belongs I had lost my comfort I am sure but he went to twenty more marks and signes I think and at last said if these marks and fignes be in you then these comforts belong unto you but if they be not then you deceive your selves but in the conclusion he said indeed if wee would repent and wash away our sinnes by that like David forsake all our sinnes and bring our whole hearts to Christ and denie the world the pleasures and profits of the world and abundance more which I cannot now stand to name but all this I am sure he bad me and others to do before we did presume to lay hold of any comfort so that whereas I was in hopes of being comforted I was not but rather cast down but at some other time Christ served me freely with comfort from his word for which I blesse his name and thus I have told you what comfort Christ hath given me ere now But yet I will tell you of one or two wayes more by which Christ uses to come and serve mee with comfort giving the water of life to mee One way in Christian meetings commonly called conventicles heretofore but I have in these meetings found much of Christ and comfort to my poore soule at our last meeting I think there was some twenty of us all met in a friends house purposely to discourse of Christ and wait on Christ expecting all comfort from Christ and whilst we were speaking and discoursing of Christ in that place I think verily we were every one refreshed onely by telling how Christ useth to serve us sometimes presently and sometimes not at all but seemed to be angry with us for asking some carnall things so at last wee found many things Christ would never grant to any of us but rather seemed to frown upon us for asking some things which we had all been a craving of him so at that time we considered what might be got by begging and parted but this I do remember a scoffing Ishmael called it a tub preaching And one time which I shall never forget I was walking all alone by Christs doore in a way of meditation of his bounty love and franknesse to such poore fellowes as I and while I was walking thinking nothing God knows Christ stept out and puld me in set me down and himself by me and supt with me we had whole flagons of wine then of which I drank very freely and I dare say I shall never forget this bout So the next day I told half a dozen Christians waiting at Christs door in a sermon how I had sped the day before they bade me thank God saying they had never such good fortune nor such discoveries of Christs love Friend friend I rejoyce to heare these sweet relations of your experience but let me tell you I am ashamed and so may you well be but however I am to think how you complaind nay murmured but now and said Christ had never served you of the water of life but you had waited so long and so long and I cannot tell how long you made me beleeve how Christ had served thousands and not you Friend I am ashamed to thinke how you have abused Christ by your false complaints of Christ surely it is a great sinne in you I pray doe so no more But now mee thinks I heare one say but I am a poore thirsty soule I doe not know when in prayer sermon christian conference either I was so refreshed and therefore what would you have me doe who am even scorcht with heat and thirst I thirst for Christ and would rather have him then the world a thousand times if I know my own heart What would you have me doe dost thou say Let me tell thee first how well I like this complaint of thine Surely by this complaint of thine and the high prising of this river it doth argue his streames strongly running in thy soule Yea let me tell thee my thoughts This I doe beleeve t is from the presence of Christ and the Spirit in the soule that any soule living is drawne forth to desire Christ or the Spirit you know the naturall man desires not the things of God but is dead to every good worke or desire and sure cannot indeed desire any thing in a spirituall way before God workes it in his soule Now friend if God or Christ hath wrought a strong desire after the well of life the river of life the spirit let me tell thee I verily beleeve he hath given it thee already for this desire in thy soule is to me a strong evidence of it I for my part doe firmly conclude when I heare any soule complaine for want of Christ and the Spirit saying of Christ and the Spirit his soule had rather have Christ and the Spirit then all the pleasures profits of the world I say I doe conclude this to be the work of God in the soule This is true a naturall man may have a heart quame and a heart wish to die the death of the righteous as wicked Balaam once said O that I might die the death of the righteous and that my last end may be like theirs I say A wicked man may desire to bee ownd of Christ nay more to give all the world for Christ at the last hower when they come to see a necessity and their souls damn'd for want of Christ O how will a carnall man dying mourn and beg and cry for Christ and howl for Christ too
and yet I dare say there are some sinners at whose doore Christ hath knocked twenty years by preachings teachings afflicting and admonishing by his word and his Spirit and by example too But what doe I speake of twenty yeares are there not some gray-headed sinners at whose doore Christ hath often knockt heretofore but now they are deaf and cannot heare and the things belonging to their peace are hid from their eyes as once from Ierusalems for whose misery Christ wept and so will ye over your own souls one day in flames of hell O me thinks I see poor souls sit looking on one another weeping bitterly for their folly in not minding Christs knocks when time was O saith the aprentise wringing of his hands with heart breaking sighs I was seven yeares in a godly family where my master prayed read and expounded every day by which Christ oft knockt at my heart and made me to resolve for to let him in but I was yong and thought it was too soon to hear him yet but I made account to do it when my time was out but Christ then did not knock or at least I minded him not for the world wife and children came upon mee that I did not once minde him And so another Bible-carrier doth much the like O saith he in these flames weeping I went twise every Sunday in the yeare to the Church with my wife and family heard-prayers took my booke turnd to text and proofes and had Christ knocking at my heart too but I know not how still I forgot all and Christ knocks too who at last left to knock at all but I went still to Church with my neighbours according to the custome with old father worldling who would alwayes talk of businesse going home and comming putting all good things quite out of my minde for which cursed be the time that ever I did see him for it may beels I might have minded something what I heard of there as well as many others whom wee counted puritanes because they would still be talking what good matter they had heard and how sweet it was talking of the uses but as we followed after wee laughing for to hear them goe conning over the sermon one to another all the way home not at all minding what he said to us but how he met with such a one and such a one and never minded once at all our selves like unhappy soules for which we must lie in the flames for ever to repent our folly and houle for our misery in not harkening unto Christ when the time was which never shall be more O saith wrinkled faced hypocrite in the flames at the bottome I deceived my self many an honest Christian too like a cursed wretch for I was a great professor seven years together in which time Christ gave me many a hard rap at the door of conscience for my hollow-heart sometimes telling me I was a masked sinner and had a rotten heart ayming at the world name fame credit all the while profession was in request going up and down with many honest Christians and would be talking with them in matters of religion for many by ends little minding Christs thundring knocks against such as I crying woe woe woe to the hypocrites Scribes and the Pharisees one that did love much to have preheminency though a great professor bearing sway and rule just like a Bishop over the Church of Christ lord and master-like saying he was chief and must be beleeved and obeyed in his forme minding this his owne selfe and interest more then the honour of his master or the good of poore Christians whom hee seldome went to visit without his doctors fee or the hope of a sermon if in case he died worth him five pound Woe woe to those that so neglect the Church of Christ and the poore Saints who sometimes lies in cottages and sellers where their worships will not come it is to mean a thing because they are masters and called Rabbi Rabbi which the true Disciple never aymed at But stay I had like to forget one sinner more where Christ hath long stood and usually doth yea longer then at any doore besides I mean the simple Christian or the ignorant Christian who knowes not right or left hand in religion more then his grandmother taught him bringing of him up according to the custome which their parents left them building their religion on the old race yet must still be called Christian for his baptisme sake which I speak not against but the mans ignorance which the Lord knowes I pitty for truely at these poore soules doore doth Christ knock many times but the soule is so simple it doth not know Christ when he knocks but gapes and stares on the Parson in the pulpit when it is Christ that knocks at the heart with life light and knowledge which is more worth then jewels crownes and kingdomes yea the gold of Ophir and the rich ships of Tharshish but poore simple sotted and deluded soule thou knowest not the want of this knowledge Christ and thy souls misery for want of knowledge And here mistake me not for I doe not mean unlearned men more then learned men for truely many of them which are great Grecians know not the A.B.C. in the new creature but by heare say poore simple souls how many such be there in the world doe you not know thousands that are cryed up for wise able men though not such great Schollers yet cried up for able men fit for Jewry Judge or Justiceship which I doe not speak against but honour yet I say I will take a young stripling in the school of Christ without an haire on his face shall winde him like a childe in the worke of conviction for sin Christ knocking at thy heart and the Spirits working in the new man and old and sound experienced things I say in these things he will wind your old sollid blades many Churchwardens who should be knowing men as well as Furre-gowned where Christ hath often knockt before ever that came on him but now he thinks it is enough to sit by his white rod in a majestick way with a black soule by cheating of the poor to feast his own ungodly gut with capon sack and claret till his belly be so swelld that Christ cannot come at his heart or seldom doth hereafter for for the most they turne drunkards not that I mean right blading cursed or down right drunkards but I mean in a dry way without any roaring by clubbing pot after pot and then an half pint and another to that with a point at the last to set the reckoning right and a gell of strong water to close up their stomake I am sure I know some that will sit with a coughing and spauling discourse from four to six from six to eleven with aserious discourse in a cavilere way of a turn that shall be but I do not know when and so they drink healths saying
sinner thou art proud I say and art ashamed to have this water of life on Christs owne termes freely but wouldst faine buy the river by a worthynesse in thy selfe O let me see thee let me see thy face ô covetous man What wouldst thou buy Christs purchase over his head that is the plaine english of it get thee gone O proud sinner and come againe beggar-like with a Bottle and a Dish that is a a poore empty and unworthy soule this is the way man if thou meanst to speed for truly I think for a sinner to bring any thing of his own worthynesse to God and Christ is as great a sinne as thou canst commit this is an affronting sinne it affronts God and Christ as if they were sellers of the water of life which they can as freely give to a thirsty soule as raine to the thirsty ground What cost or charge or labour is it for God to raine downe showers to water the earth when it lyes gaping for it I say it is no charge or labour to God who hath his clouds and bottles full and a word from God and they straight shower down and doe not give over till they have satisfied the dry ground so truly can and will God raine down this water of life to a poore and thirsty soule gaping for it When the poore and needy cry for water and there is none I the Lord will heare Isaiah 41. But againe I say as at first this is an affront to God and Christ to bring any thing for a paile yea a soule full of the water of life it is the high-way to overturne his free grace which God will have exalted above the heavens and that it might be known in the earth he freely sent yea gave his Sonne unsought uncravd and will he sell the river thinke you that is purchased by his Sonne doe not thinke so it overturnes the glory of his free grace freely offered unto all that freely will accept it and this was Gods designe to make his glory known unto the sons of men which they have little minded I say the designe of God from all eternity was to set up his name his free grace in giving Christ the bread of life and the Spirit the water of life freely to the sonnes of men Iohn 6.48.32.33 and 48.9.10 Iohn 4.20.21 Iohn 7.37 O God delights to make all his attributes known his Justice Power Wisdome But the glory of his grace freely giving Christ and the Spirit This is that which especially he would have exalted in the world and the sonnes of men admire him in God would be admired for his bounty to give so like himselfe a Christ a River of life freely I say God thinks not much to give all this for the magnifying of his free grace that his bounty and himselfe might be admired and we the sonnes of men cry out and say who who is a God like unto thee that pardons iniquity by forgiving iniquity transgression and sinne giving life Christ and the Spirit freely Now I say this was Gods designe Before all worlds and for this designes sake even the glory of his grace Iohn 3. v. 16. he gives his Sonne and Spirit freely Now when a Soul will not come to God nor accept of God his Sonne the Spirit freely but would bring some kind of worthynesse for his Sonne and river thou overturnest this grace shearly overturnest it O what a fearfull thing is this to buy Christs river I tell thee thou buying Christian Christ will not sell one drop for Iewels Gold nor Silver for he bought to give and thou talkst of buying by so much repentance tears and I know not what O but now me thinks I heare some poore soule say I see no worthynesse in my selfe neither looke I after a worthynesse or expect to have a drop of the river of life for any worthynesse of my owne I loath my selfe and condemne my selfe for I finde my selfe wholly carnall fold under sinne and in the selfe condemning way have I like a Beggar waited at Christs doore for the bread and water of life praying and craving Christ for it night and day but I am still unserved and yet I see thousands served who have not waited half so long as I. Well friend Beggers must be so served that they may learne how to wait if you give a Beggar he like a Fidler straight is gone and many have served Christ so sometimes for a creature comfort for a supply of helpe in time of need for a wife for a childe sometimes given by Christ sometimes spared by Christ from death in sicknesse which as soon as Christ hath given them they straight runne away and scarce say I thank you Christ but runne straight away till they know not what to doe for another such like Almes and Friend many serve Christ so for the river of life O they would faine have the water of life and are night and day at Christs doore by prayers sermons c. When Christ hath once served them with a prettie deale of assurance about the river and their soules these beggars straight are gone away into the worlds cares and pleasures where Christ heares no more of them for the river nor nothing else a long time after but this Christ takes very unkindly from them that they should as soon as ever their own turn is served by Christ come no more at Christ till some great necessitie even drives them and it may be Christ sees thee that thou wouldst serve him so too and therefore makes thee wait a little a little do you call it when I have waited whilst many have been served and some that I know very well but I am still unserved Wel friend do not be angry if Christ makes the last first the first last by this they all learn to wait Christs leasure which is a lesson he wil teach his poore who beg for the bread of life the river of life and such things I say he will learne them all I all to wait his leasure first or last But stay my friend it may be thou art served already I have seen beggars well served and yet begging presently after as if they were starved it may be thou doest do so about the river let me ask thee one question and answer me truely have you never had no bread nor water from Christ at no time Yes I must confesse the truth and will seeing you put me to it I was one time very earnestly begging in my closet all alone by prayer and then Christ indeed gave me a good draught of the water of life the bread of life I mean the Spirit which satisfied me for two or three dayes and made my heart very lightsom and chearfull And I will tell you of another time when I was at a sermon where I got a sup and a bit too for he was speaking how freely Christ did give poore sinners the river of life the well of life the
for relations sake O friends there is such a neere relation between Christ and a Christian he is the head and you the members he is the Bridegroome and you the Bride he is the vine and you the branches Christ cannot but bid you wellcome nor the father neither for you are all his children how wellcome is a friend a childe a husband after seven yeares voyage when returned what love what embraces doth then passe between them powring heart into heart as it were How sweetly did Josephs and his brethrens bowels yerne one towards another O friends Christ will one day embrace you in his armes with his rowling bowels like a husband his beloved wife after seven yeares absence and you him with teares and kisses of joy and love How glad was Dide queene of Carthage when she had Aeneas prince of Troy to look on and embrace Well friends time will come when thou shalt have thy Christ to embrace and look on who hath endured more broiles ten thousand times then all Aeneas feigned ones Here Christ to look on is admirable and lovely too in broiles O saith the Spouse Who is this that coms from Bozrah with his garments dipped in blood Isaiah 63.1.2 travelling in the greatnes of his strength Christ the prince and Captain of our salvation comes from the fields of slaughter like some noble champion and hath his bloody armes which doth declare him conquerour so Christ here travels from Bozra a field of slaughter this I take to be the crosse of Christ on which he might be well said and did conquer all the Churches enemies yea naild them to the crosse as Paul speaketh by triumphing over them openly upon the crosse Well in this field Christ slayes the law sinne and death making this saying good O death I will be thy death 1 Cor. 15.55 And now comes in warlick vestures which are dipped in this blood declaring him to be the mighty conquerour Well the Spouse sits and sees him at her window comming from the field which is the Spirit in the soule through which she lookes upon these mighty champions Christ Sinne Death and Devils Well Christ foyls and spoyles all by trampling on all which being done he leaves them dead and comes away to refresh himselfe in glory the Spouse spies him in the way and cries out who is this not that shee did not know Christ well enough but she is taken with Christ in the beholding of Christ thus bravely wins the field which Christ never quited til all foild spoild the day his own Well Is the Soule now so taken with the gallentry of Christ that she cryes out for joy and wonder O then how wilt thou be taken when thou shalt see this Christ againe which heare is promised yea stroak the face of this Champion Christ the Prince of our salvation how will she be taken with him then saying O my deare Christ it was my enemies thou ingaged in Bozra and if thou hadst not conquered my soule and thousands more had been undone for ever but seeing thou didst win the day we will name and stile thee most high and excellent and mighty Conquerour King of Saints Prince and Captaine of our salvation which thou for ever shalt be called by Saints and Angels men and Devils poore drooping sinner what dost thou think of this day and this Christ who is thy Champion thy Captaine and Salvation I say what dost thou thinke O malencholy Christian of this day when thou shalt see the face of this Prince and Saviour wilt thou not make one to sing his prayses to sing his victories over sinne death hell men and devils which Angels now are doing and so shalt thou and this shall be thy reward too a full reward indeed for all thou ever didst or suffredst In the mean time bear up bear up thy head O drooping Christian Christ hath conquered sinne death men and devils and yet it may be thou fearest all O foolish sinner weake in faith men are bound sinne and satan wounded yea death and sinne slaine too and all by Christ in Bozra what meanst thou to be troubled O but Sir Sir me thinks I see sinne alive and Satan loose yea both in me I will not deny but thou mayst think so but all is not true that men doe thinke but grant both these be in thee yet if sinne be wounded and Satan bound one cannot long live nor the other doe much mischeife if sinne be wounded it is to the heart be sure of that And when Christ was wounded there by sinne he straight died well I am sure Christ hath wounded sinne there too and it cannot live long O Sir Sir it is livelier then ever it struggles more then ever O friend that is to me as cleare as the day that sinne is just a dying every thing in nature will doe the like what dost thou see dying willing but a Saint and he I must confesse on this consideration that he shall live with God and Christ and behold the face of God and Christ as in the first words I say on this consideration happily he may with a great deale of willingnesse die But who besides the Saint will will man or beast or fish or foule or any other creature No no the fish yawns and gapes the fowle flutters the beast beats it selfe and yels though bound and musled man mournes and cries alas alas why must I die and leave my hopes my wife my childe my lands and livings nay friends and all fetch the Doctor quickly fetch the Doctor save me if it be possible I faine would live a little longer and thus he mournes to think on death and when it comes and drawes neere to him then he growns and gasps and grinnes and stares still striving with it while breath doth last Well friend the fish yawns and gapes the fowle flutters the beast yels man mournes and cries alas what shall sinne doe nothing it were contrary unto nature if it should die without its throwes in thy soule But stay you said Satan was bound I I did so and so he is in two respects Christ hath bound him up from hurting thee Christ hath bound him up from forcing thee First From hurting thee you know if the most notorious theeving rogue in the world lyes bound in a lone womans house hand and foot there was no ground nor cause of feare he is bound hand and foot what can he now doe but curse and swear well she being a weak woman is troubled and frighted notwithstanding but when her husband comes home her feares ceaseth and are gone Well friends know this Christ hath bound Satan for a thousand yeares yea for ever from mischeiving his Saints and Servants and if he be in thee he is bound O no me thinks he is loose he doth so tempt me and accuse me I doe not know what to doe it may be so he doth tempt and accuse thee I did not say Christ had bound Satans tongue no