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ID Title Author Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication) STC Words Pages
A02166 The repentance of Robert Greene Maister of Artes. Wherein by himselfe is laid open his loose life, with the manner of his death Greene, Robert, 1558?-1592. 1592 (1592) STC 12306; ESTC S119749 13,805 32

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be the day wherein I was born and haplesse be the brests that gaue me sucke Why did God create me to bee a vessell of wrath Why did hee breath life into me thus to make me a lost sheepe Oh I feele a hell already in my conscience the number of my sinnes do muster before my eies the poore mens plaints that I haue wronged cries out in mine eares and saith Robin Greene thou art damnd nay the iustice of God tels mee I cannot bee saued Now I do remember though too late that I haue read in the Scriptures how neither adulterers swearers theeues nor murderers shall inherite the kingdome of heauen What hope then can I haue of any grace when giuen ouer from all grace I exceeded all other in these kinde of sinnes If thus vppon earth and aliue I feele a hell oh what a thing is that hell where my soule shall euerlastingly liue in torments I am taught by the scripture to pray but to whom shoulde I pray to him that I haue blasphemed to him that I haue contemned and despised whose name I haue taken in vaine No no I am in a hell Oh that my last gaspe were come that I might be with Iudas or Cain for their place is better than mine or that I might haue power with these hands to vnlose my soule from this wretched carcasse that hath imprisoned so many wicked villainies within it Oh I haue sinned not against the Father nor against the Sonne but against the holy Ghost for I presumed vpon grace and when the spirit of God cried in my mind thoght and said drunkennes is a vice whoredome is a vice I carelesly in contempt resisted this motion and as it were in a brauery committed these sinnes with greedines Oh now I shall crie with Diues to haue one drop of water for my tongue but shall not be heard I haue sinned against my owne soule and therefore shalbe cast into vtter darknesse and further I shall not come till I haue paid the vttermost farthing which I shal neuer be able to satisfie O happy are you that feele the sparks of Gods fauour in your hearts happy are you that haue hope in the passion of Christ happy are you that beleue that God died for you happy are you that can pray Oh why doth not God shew the like mercie vnto mee The reason is because in all my life I neuer did any good I alwaies gloried in sinne and despised them that imbraced vertue God is iust and cannot pardon my offences and therefore I would I were out of this earthly hell so I were in that second hell that my soule might suffer tormentes for now I am vexed both in soule and bodie In this despairing humor searching further into the said Booke of Resolution I found a place that greatly did comfort mee laid before me the promises of Gods mercie shewing mee that although the Iustice of God was great to punish sinners yet his mercie did exceede his works and though my faults were as red as skarlet yet washt with his bloud they shoulde bee made as white as snow therein was laid before mine eyes that Dauid who was called a man after his owne heart did both commit adultery and sealde it with murther yet when hee did repent God heard him and admited him to his fauour Therin was laid before me the obstinate sinne of Peter that not onely denied his Maister Christ but also forswore himselfe yet so soone as hee shed tears and did hartily repent him his offences were pardoned Therein was laid open the theefe that had liued licentiously and had scarse in all his life done one good deed and yet hee was saued by hope in the mercies of God Therein was also laide open how the seueritie of the Law was mittigated with the sweet and comfortable promises of the Gospell insomuch that I began to be somewhat pacified a little quieted in mind taking great ioy and comfort in the pithie perswasions and promises of Gods mercie alleadged in that Booke And yet I was not presently resolued in my conscience that God would deale so fauorably with me for that stil the multitude of my sinnes presented me with his Iustice and would therefore reason thus with my selfe Why those men before mentioned were elected and predestinated to be chosen vessels of Gods glory therfore though they did fal yet they rose againe did shew it in time with some other fruits of their election But contrariwise I the most wicked of all men was euen brought vp from my swadling clouts in wickednes my infancy was sin my riper age increast in wickednes I tooke no pleasure but in ill neither was my minde sette vpon any thing but vpon the spoyle then seeing all my life was lead in lewdnes and I neuer but once felt any remorse of conscience how can God pardon mee that repent rather for feare than for loue Yet calling vnto mind the words of Esay that at what time soeuer a sinner doth repent him from the bottome of his heart the Lord would wipe away all his wickednes out of his remembrance Thus beeing at a battaile betweene the spirite and the flesh I beggane to feele a greater comfort in my mind so that I did teares confesse and acknowledge that although I was a most miserable sinner yet the anguish that Christ suffered on the Crosse was able to purge and cleanse me from all my offences so that taking hold with faith vpon the promises of the Gospell I waxed strong in spirite and became able to resist and withstand all the desperate attempts that Sathan had giuen before to my weake and feéble conscience When thus I had consideratly thought on the wretchednes of my life and therewithall looked into the vncertainty of death I thought good to write a short discourse of my the same which I haue ioyned to this treatise containing as followeth The life and death of Robert Greene Maister of Artes. I Neede not make long discourse of my parentes who for their grauitie and honest life is well knowne and esteemed amongst their neighbors namely in the Cittie of Norwitch where I was bred and borne But as out of one selfe same clod of clay there sprouts both stinking weeds and delightfull flowers so from honest parentes often grow most dishonest children for my Father had care to haue mee in my Non-age brought vp at schoole that I might through the studie of good letters grow to be a frend to my self a profitable member to the common-welth and a comfort to him in his age But as early pricks the tree that will proue a thorne so euen in my first yeares I began to followe the filthines of mine owne desires and neyther to listen to the wholesome aduertisements of my parentes nor bee rulde by the carefull correction of my Maister For being at the Uniuersitie of Cambridge I light amongst wags as lewd as my selfe with whome I consumed the flower of