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A77565 Five new playes, (viz.) The madd couple well matcht. Novella. Court begger. City witt. Damoiselle. By Richard Brome. Brome, Richard, d. 1652?; Brome, Alexander, 1620-1666.; Cross, Thomas, fl. 1632-1682, engraver. 1653 (1653) Wing B4870; Wing B4866; Wing B4868; Thomason E1423_1; ESTC R202038 142,986 500

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No I could weepe for that Gua. How ha what 's that This money 's mine againe and thou art not If thou dost wish one dayes procrastination Degenerate brat changeling Fla. Deare Father Father Gua. Th' ast seene thy last of happinesse all content From this black minute and thy selfe are strangers Fla. Sir I beseech you heare me Gu. Get you in I 'le mew you up where never Sun shall show Into what endlesse misery I 'le cast thee Nor any sound bring succour to thine Eare To call thee back from torment Fla. Sir deare sir Gua. My selfe will be your Keeper Cook and Carver Fla Indeed you will be sorry Gua. Sorry for what Fla. For the mistake you run away withall Gua. Didst thou not say thou wept'st because to morrow was come so nigh Fla. So nigh and yet not come sir Fearing how many dangerous houres are thither Gua. Ha! I beginne to be now sorry indeed Fla. Loves Minutes sir are dayes and houres are years When each protracted multiplies our feares Gua. Now I am sorry with all my heart and here 's a Thousand checqines to expiate my trespasse But do not let thy husband know of them Till he redeeme a fault to their full value Oh mine own Girle my honey honey Girle Fla. Was not I sir applauding of your wisdome And giving you the glory of my comfort In this approved match Gua. Thou didst thou didst With teares of joy I must confesse thou didst Fla. Had you but heard me out I had magnified My fortune sprung out of your providence Gua. Speake yet and I will heare attentively Fla. First then how first your admirable wisdome Weighing how I had setled my affection Upon Francisco excellent in parts Of noble blood how ever low in fortune You gave your free consent knowing your estate To be a portion fitter to restore him Unto the dignity of his Ancestors Then to be added to anothers Muck-hill That I should be his wife Gua. What 's this you say Fla. Nay deare sir flie not off Gua. Well on then on Fla. I say you gave consent that I should be Wife to that noble Gentleman pray sit still sir As you had foreseene my future happines Only in him consisted sir untill This wealthy heire young Fabritio You Neighbour Trades-mans Son of great estate Was by his father tender'd unto you For me a husband then unseene by mee But since I must confesse a proper man Worthy a fitter Wife Gua. Sweet Modesty Fla. But that your wisdome needs will have it so By reason that his heapes may purchase honour Which to'thers wants can never wash away But farewell him I must looke this way now And crown your wisdome with this closing point That whereas I betroth'd was to Francisco And Pantalonies Sonne unto another A Lady as t is justified at Rome You force me on this man the fittest husband On whom to make my party good hereafter Who shall not dare to upbraide my breach of faith Gua. And i st not a sound policy my Flavia A Bell rings But now no more old Pantaloni comes I take it How now dos he not come Enter Nanulo Nan. Signor Pantaloni sir intreats you Meet him on the Rialto instantly That you may goe to the Advocates together Gua. It is my Flavia interchangeably To seale your Marriage covenants make thee happy Looke to my house and havings keepe all safe I shall be absent most part of this day Be carefull Girle thine own speciall good Requires thee to 't and therefore I dare trust thee Fla. Happy successe attend you sir whilst I Rest here in prayers for you Gua Thanks my child Come sirrah lock the doore But first d ee hear Beware that none have entrance in my absence Except Fabritio Pantalonie's Sonne Or such as I have warranted looke to it Nan. With due respect Gua. Come lock the doore I say Exit Fla. I I be sure of that and I could wish My thoughts were prisoners too that they might fly No further then the casement or the wicket Where they loose things get out and nothing bring Back to this heart but cold and sad returnes O my Astutta Enter Astutta Ast. Now or never helpe me Fla. As thou didst ever dreame what true love was Fancy some way to quit me of this bondage Or else contrive this houre to be my last Ast. What! would you disobey your Father what So good so carefull and so wise a Parent Fla. O doe not vex me into longer life Either speake helpe or let me die in silence Ast. Yes at sixteene you would die at sixteene Fla. Else let thy pitty of my youth preserve me Ast. O Cupid what a Termagant tyrant art thou Over poore subjects of sixteene There is not one Among a hundred of those ticklish Trifles But is more taken with a Toy at sixteene Then six and twenty because by that time The edges of most maydenheads are allayd Fla. Nay deare Astutta hast thou thought a course Ast. What to prevent your Father my good Master Thinke you I can turne traytor to his trust And crosse his purpose for your Marriage Fla. If Knife or Poyson Fire or Water may Remove this wretched cause I 'le do it else Ast. Yes you were best leape from the top o' th' house Into the Cavail grande and there perhaps Some courteous Gondaliar may catch you up And waft you to some house of deare delight Fla. Thou tortur'st me Ast. You see the doore is shut And Go-by-ground your fathers Giant here More sterne then Cerberus holds fast the Key You can make no excursion nor let in Any attempt for your redemption No Letter or a Message can approach you But by this Gyant-dwarfe your Fathers Agent Though I my selfe were wicked to assist you Fla. O couldst thou be so vertuous Then I know Some quaint devise would issue from thy braine To conjure and controwle his weaker spirits Thou knowst I have command of Gold and Jewells Enough to buy a Senators large conscience Doe thou command it all to win him to us That petty thing Dos he appeare bribe-free Is he the only officer uncorrupted Enter Nanulo Nan. Madona Flavia newes Fla. What I beseech you Nan. From your elected Bridegroome brave Fabritio Ast. Dissemble patience as you are a woman Or hope to be and heare him handsomely Fla. How dos hee Nanulo Ast. That was well said Nan. VVell and respectfull towards you it seemes For hee desires you not to stir abroad As I could wish you would not Fla. Insolent slave You know I may not stir beyond the Key You keepe and yet you wish me stay within Ast. VVill you marre all the reason Nan. The reason is he meanes to send anon A Mercadante from the Merceria The famous Pedler woman of this City VVith her most precious wares for you to choose VVhat you shall like and take them as his presents A ceremony us'd on wedding Eves Such Rings such Things such Knacks such Knots Bobs Such Curles such
say I was sent or writ for at all more then by a Dreame or Vision But here I am and meane to remaine to night I hope the house can afford you another Bed in 't Mr. Bellamy and you to leave mee to my owne Friend-wife I like the lodging most curiously sweete Friend and I prethee le ts try heartily what luck we may have in a strange place I would so faine have a little one like thee Bel. I 'le leave you to your wishes a good night to you Al. Pray sir a word first husband be farther Sa. Faces about Tom Saleware and march forwards Al. You told mee sir of a hundred pound that your sweete Lady Thrivewell sent me Bel. 'T is true I have it for you Al. But shee has since countermanded you to keepe it has shee and to mock my expectation of that and you why have you foold me thus Bel. I rather should suspect your craft in this prevention but love forbids me and I must conclude 't is witchcraft in your husband Al. Come let 's kisse friends and sweet to morrow night I will prevent his Witchcraft in the full enjoyment of our free pleasures be you true to me Bel. May all that 's Man in me forsake me else Al. Another kisse and then good night Sa. Are you still whispering no matter let 'em whisper Bel. Good night Exit Al. Now may the spirits of all injur'd women be added to mine owne for my revenge which I this night will dreame of slighted and mock'd hee and his like shall know That when a yeilding woman is so crost All thoughts but of revenge with her are lost Sa. O hee 's gone Ally Friend I would say And now I prithee tell mee how or why thou cam'st hither Al. Will you pardon me Sa. Yes faith I were no friend else Al. 'T was but to try if I could make thee jealous Sa. In waggery did not I say so when doe my prophecies faile Al. But what brought you hither thinke you Sa. A Letter from one Anonimus but I 'le eate Spiders and breake if you sent it not Al. Give me the Letter Sal. Where is it facks I ha' lost it Al. 'T was I indeed that sent it Sa. Did not I say so too and that it should ha' been Anonima Sapientia mea mihi when doe my prophecies faile I 'le to bed instantly while the prophetick spirit is in mee and get a small Prophet or a Southsayer Al. No I 'le have no bed-fellow to night Sa. Nere the lesse for a hasty word I hope Friend Al. I am at a word for that Sa. I 'le lie upon thy feet then Al. Well you may draw the Curtaines and sleepe by me Sa. Sapientia mea mihi stultitia tua tibi Puts in the bed Exit ACT IV. SCENE IV. Phebe passes over the stage in night attire Carelesse followes her as in the darke Car. MAdam Madam sweet Madam 't will not be day these three houres stay but three minuits longer but a touch more she 's whipt into her Chamber Could I but finde the Dore I know my Unkle's from home O shee returnes with light that 's well Enter Lady a light La. What aile you Are you mad Car. Would not any man be mad for losing such a Bed-fellow sweet Madam let us retire without any noise La. What an insatiate beast are you would you undoe for ever both me and your selfe Car. Not with one doe more I warrant you come away Madam Madam somebody knocks mainly at the gate and I believe it is my Master return'd before his time Enter Closet La. I cannot thinke 't is he Car. 'T is the Rogue my man I warrant drunke and has forgot I turnd him away but he shall spoyl no sport Come away Madam La. Closet goe your wayes downe and hearke before you Clo. I will Madam Exit Car. So now come Madam I commend you in the charge you have given your watch-woman La. What charge doe you guesse Car. Why to tell my Unkle if he be come that hee must not come neare you that you have had no rest to Night till just now you are fallen asleepe and so forth La. Goe you are a wicked fellow I am sorry for any the least favour I have done thee and doe thou dare to attempt me once more I 'le ha' thee turnd headlong out of my dores Car. I have got her with child to night with a sparke of mine owne spirit and longs already to doe me mischiefe The boy will be like mee therefore 't is pity to knock 't o' the head But come Madam tother crash and good night must I drag you to 't La. Touch mee but with a finger and I 'le raise the House Car. You dare not sure and now take heed you vex me not have you not been my whore La. You dare not say so for spoyling your fortune Car. Faith but I dare and if you will not obey me in a course of further pleasure to night fetch me a hundred peeces to take a course abroad withall doe yee looke I 'le make you fetch me hundred after hundred Huswife when I want it or shall be pleas'd to call for 't All comes out else the gates of your fame flies open Lady I will proclaime our Act La. Dare you forfit your own Reputation so Car. I shall gaine Reputation by 't in the company I keepe abroad and if the Cuckold my Unkle come to the knowledge of it at home I shall possesse him that you lustfully tempted me to it La. Canst thou be so villanously impudent to destroy thine own fortune to ruine me Car. You may conceale all then and so will I and mend my fortune by yours I will live bravely upon your fortune and the heire which I have got to Night shall inherit it my Unkles estate And therefore indeed I would have all conceald for my childs good or rather for mine owne for it shall goe hard if I put him not into a course in his minority to consume the estate upon me before he come to age La. I am undone Car. And O that ever I did it La. Thou Villaine hast undone me Car. Come I 'le doe you agen and then all 's whole agen Y' are both undone O you prodigious monsters That have betwixt you made me monster too What 's to be done but that I kill you both Then fall upon my sword Enter Thrivewell Saveall Sav. Sir you resume the temper of humanity And let the Law distinguish you from them You neither are to be their Executioner Nor to fall with them Thr. Life to me is torment Car. O the Devill what a case am I in now La. Pray heare me sir Thr. Can more be said to aggravate thy shame Or my affliction then I have heard already Sa. Let me intreat you heare her La. What shame did you or what affliction I Suffer when you discoverd unto me Your bargaine of a hundred pound in Saleware You understand me How was life a torment To
Purles such Tricks and Trilly bubkins As Mayds would turne no Mayds almost to see 'hem And can you yet be angry at such newes VVith me the gladsome bringer Ast. Very good I have heard of this rare Pedler-woman And that shee is much us'd in close affaires Twixt parties Hee and Shee and doe not doubt Since you make golden offers gentle Mistresse To worke her to your ends as neare d ee marke As womans wit may reach at such a pinch Pray let her come Fla. VVell sir you know I shall not stir abroad VVhen shee is come shee 's welcome with my thanks Returne so by the messenger Nan. Most readily Exit Ast. Now Mistris if I chance to set the sadle On the right horse that is to place your Mayden-head VVhere you would faine bestow it I trust you will Out of your store reward me with a dowry Fit to convey me to a Tradesmans Bed Fla. Yes and wish there a second Maydenhead On the condition Ast. Well be chearfull then And cleare those cloudy looks awake your senses Refresh your temples rowse invention up I have found ground to build on but there lacks Much rewing squaring joynting to make sure Against all stormes our lofty Archi'ture Come up to councell Fla. Now thou comforts me Exeunt Om. ACT II. SCENE I. Enter Pantoloni Guadagni Nicolo with a Zaffies habit under his arme Pan. IS this Checquino's house your Advocate Gua. It is and Prospero your learned Councell Is with him here attending too our comming Pan. T is well Give me my writings Nicolo Please you to enter I 'le dispatch my man Exit Guad And follow instantly Now Nicolo About the serious busines Nicolo In which this morning I instructed you Nic. For your revenge sir Pan. Right my Apprehension On that discourteous cursed Curtezan T will breed me more delight then all the dalliances I could have found in her most free ambraces I hug my quick and sweet invention for it Here take this gold this bright refulgent gold Twenty Checquines and promise twenty more On the performance of the brave exploy't T will take unto my wish I doe foresee 't Nic. T will be sir such a notable Revenge That the report of it in after-ages Will either mortifie concupiscence In young lascivious Harlots or at least Fright out of 'em their itch of wronging age They shall no more dare to put youthfull tricks On yeares and gravity Pan. Right my Nicolo Nic. Sli'd sir and if you should not be revengd An old man should not step in the Bordello Without the taunts of Boyes and Gondeliers Crying take heed old man you be not serv'd As the Movella fitted Pantaloni So in short time the City were well serv'd When age shall be asham'd to crawle to lechery Pan. Right witty Knave Go heartily about it Thinke what a Master t is thou dost it for That has no slender tie upon thy duty One that has bred thee from a youngling up To this maturity Nic. I must acknowledge it Pan. And Nicolo it was no petty kindnes To manumize your Father from the Galley Which you cannot forget Nic. Yet must I heare it Pan. But I 'le urge thee no further Boy be carefull Worke but this for me with effect and speed And bind me as a Father to thy need Exit Nic. You have even spoyl'd all now I had as good a mind And thought to ha' gone as heartily about This peece of villany as the Devill that Is in my Master could devise or wish Till that ore-doing spirit put me out Could he not see 't was well and mischievous Enough in conscience but himselfe must crosse it Dos he thinke by redeeming of my Father To slave me with his boasts and foule upbraydings Had he still rowd i' th' gally I not knowing The toyle the smart and griefe had been his own Now I inherit what was then his paine Hearing continually the clash of 's care And his fell stripes out of this Bablers mouth Which more then kills my thanks it wreaks my Spleen To brag of benefits one hath bestowne Doth make the best seeme lesse and most seem none So often times the greatest curtesie Is by the doer made an injury Enter Fabritio Fab. Nicolo well met I saw you house my Father And waited for you Come you shall draw neare This is a neare friends Lodging Gentlemen Piso Francisco Hora at a Table Wine c. My fathers speciall man I told you of Pray bid him welcome Hor. Most intirely Please you to sit sir Here 's a short potation Pi. But good Lyatico I assure you sir I 'le be your taster to quit feare of danger Piso drinks And now I 'le let you know we have made oath Upon this nimble master of invention This sprightly liquor to be firme and faithfull To one another in a present project Take you the lame and grow in one with us Nic. May I not aske what end your project aimes at Fra. Nor what nor unto whose Pi. Let it suffice We carry that about us shall end you They draw Stillettoes And presently if you comply not with us Nic. Nay nay by faire meanes Gentlemen I pray I am apt enough to mischiefe of my selfe Looke yee I sweare with you He drinks Hor. T is well Now know T is for the good of your young Master here Nic. Then you would use me in some treachery Against my old one Pi. Thou art a Soothsayer Nic. Look you I 'le sweare againe I like your oath Your deep Lyatick oath here wondrous well He drinks Fab. T is well done Nicolo try the bottome of 't thrice Nic. I will comply now and complot with you And was indifferently prepar'd before Provided alwayes that it tend not to Danger of 's Life Fab. Cou'dst thinke me such a Villaine Nic. Nay if it were 't were no disparagement To stake my head with yours But Gentlemen Please yee fall roundly now upon the busines I have now sworne enough Pi. Then you must answer To these intergatories First do you know If the old men Guadagni and Pantaloni Doe hold their purpose for their match to morrow Betwixt Fabritio here and Flavia Nic. They are marying of 'em now at their Lawyers By Deed and Covenant under Hand and Seale I left them and their Bookes there now together And for the Priest to morrow is the day Hor. Is not Fabritio mist at home this morning Nic. No not at all the old man's mind 's so carried Upon the wings of this new marriage fortune I cry you mercy sir you are the Gentleman I thinke that should have had her Fra. In good time sir Nic. In good time may you I 'le do something for you Fab. Honest deserving Nic Nic. Sir thus it is My Master sent in my young Masters name The more to indeare his service and his care To the young Lady that the Merchantesse The rich Shee pedler of the Merceria Should visit her to day with all her wares For her to take her
dash I will say that though my outside were glorious yet of purpose I left my inside lowsie Enter Sneakup like a Citizen Sed O Dii Quem video nonne Mr. Sneakup Cra. See my worshipfull Father-in-Law Now the Woodcocks shoot into the glade Sneak. Pray ye peace you must not know me Sar. O monstrum horrendum May not you and I know one another Sneak. Pray go home and ask my wife Enter Crasy in haste Cras. Mr. Crasie Is not one Mr. Crasie here Sneak. Yes Sir Here is Mr. Crasie for a need Sir Cras. Well done Be bold Sir Let not your dissimulation be read in your eyes You know me give me the Jewells Sneak. Yes Sir Cras. Let me alone to present them to his Grace and praise them before you are call'd Sneak. Will you do so Sir Cras. Yes For you know I must not seem to indeare them before your face For that would smell rank of correspondency Sneak. You say right Sir Cras. But betwixt us both wee 'l make a shift to cheat him Stay you here I will returne instantly O Mr. Sarpego Your Pupill will come and conduct you presently Thus sometimes by deceit deceit is known 'T is honest craft by wit to get ones own Exit Enter Ticket Rufflit Toby To. My Quondam Pedagogue Sar. My Nuper Alumnus Come present me to the Grace of Greatness I am ready behold I am approach'd according to thy intreats to approve thy praise and mine own perfection Set on His Grace shall see that we can speake true Latin and construe Ludovicus vives Go set on Tob. I cry you mercy Sir Upon my troth I tooke you for Mr. Sarpego my learned Tutor He is very like him Is he not Gentlemen But now I come to my selfe againe I remember this was never his walke nor these his cloaths Sar. Sent you not a Nuntius or a Messenger for me intimating that it was his Grace his instant desire to entertain me as his Instructor Tic. Alas he has over-studied himself You were best let blood in time Sir Sar. Sent I not you by the same messenger your ten pound Tob. My ten pound Ha ha ha I would laugh i faith if you could bob me off with such payment Ruff. Sure Sir you use some Dormitaries Best shave your head and 'noint it with Oyl of Roses Tob. Father Father Sneak. Pray peace son The plot will be discover'd else Tob. The plot what plot Sneak. The Jewells are sent in What I am Mr. Crasie now you know I shall be sent for in to his Grace instantly Tob. Midsummer Moon Midsummer Moon Sneak. In very truth son hit as 't will I say we are beholding to Mr. Holywater Tob. Heaven not blesse me if I understand not the Baboons mumpings better then your speech You are more dark then Delphos What Holywater Sneak. Why the Gentleman you know you sent to bring M. Crasie to serve his Grace with Jewells Tob. Father Heaven pardon me For sure I have a great desire to call you Cockscomb I sent no man nor is there any so stiled as Holywater about the Court Tic. Do you not want sleep sir Ruff. Or have you not seen a spirit sir Tic. Or have you not over-mus'd or over-thought your selfe as wee doubt Mr. Sarpego here has done Tob. Or has not my mother over-beaten you father You may tell me Sneak. Son I am not so very a foole but I perceive I am made a stark Asse Oh sonne thy father is cozen'd and thy mother will beat me indeed unlesse your charity conceal me in the Court here till her fury be over Ticket Hee shall stay at my Wives Chamber Rufflit And there instruct us in the passages of this cozenage Tob. Do not weep father My Lady Ticket will appease all Ruff. Adieu Mr. Sarpego Lure your braines backe againe Exeunt Sar. Sic transit gloria Mundi The learned is Cony-caught and the lover of Helicon is laugh'd at The last six-pence of my fortune is spent and I will go cry in private Exit ACT. IIII Scene I. Enter Crasy like a Dancer Cras. NOw whilst my politike Mother-in-Law is in expectation of her great adventure and my worshipfull Father-in-Law stinks at Court for feare of her I in this last disguise will pursue my new affairs Me-thinks these Jewells smile on me now more chearfully then when they were mine owne before First to my honest Punk Crack meets Crasie at the doore Crac. Who would you speak with Sir Cras. With thy sister Dost thou not know mee Jeffrey Where is she Look better on me Cras. O is it you Sir Hang me if I knew you in this habit though I was set here on purpose to watch for you Cras. What 's the matter Jeffrey Crac. Sir she is fallen into a new fit of Melancholy Some new project she has in her noddle But she desires you to worke upon this he gives him a paper I dare not be seen to talk with any body Exit Cras. What new device is this he reads Since I last saw you your Mother-in-Law Mrs. Sneakup has earnestly dealt with me to make me a Bride for her sonne Tobias If there may be any thing wrought out of it to benefit you I will suddenly take occasion to break with the Foole Wolsie of whom I am heartily weary and after be wholly disposed by you Sure this wench studies nothing but my profit Well I have thought already to make the best of her Now to my new Mistresse This is the house and here 's her maid Enter Bridget Bri. Would you speak with any here Sir Cras. With your Mistresse I take it Mistresse Crasie Bri. May not I deliver your mind unto her Sir Cras. My business is of weight and secresie yet you may tell her here is the Gentleman that her Doctor sent her Bri. O she expects him most impatiently Pray enter Sir She 's ready for you there before you Sir Exit Crasie A businesse of mine owne makes me wait here I think I saw my learned Love make this way But he alas though small in fleshly growth By reason of his high preferment is Now growne too great for me Enter Sarpego musing 'T is hee I know his stature Though not his cloaths the Ensigns of his greatness In which how big he seems though but a sprawler So cloaths can make men greater but not taller He 's deep in study I dare not interrupt him Sar. I have adventur'd though with trembling feet Unto this Mansion to exonerate At least extenuate my suspirations For my dear loss The Lady of this place Who had an equall venture and hath suffer'd In the same Fate with me may ease my sorrow Solamen miseris socios habuisse doloris I of my wrongs and she of hers shall clamor But ecce noster ubi esset Amor Bri. Most worshipfull Sir welcome from Court If your poor Handmaid may presume to say so Sar: Where is your Mistresse I mean your grand Matrona Mrs. Sneakup Bri. In the first