reason to thinke my self his child First the child ought to resemble the father Our Sauiour saith Ye shall therefore be perfect as your father which is in heauen is perfect But there is in me no part of the perfection of God either in the vertues of my minde or in the workes of my life and the Apostle Saint Peter saith As obedient children fashion not your selues vnto the former lusts of your ignorance but as hee which hath called you is hoâ—…y so be yee holy in all manner of conuersation because it is written be yee holy for I am holy And if yee call him father which without respect of person iudgeth according to euery mans worke passe the time of your dwelling here in feare By this rule of Peter they which call God their father ought to be holy as he is holy but I am altogether profane They ought to passe the time of their life reuerently in the feare of God but I haue beene and am a contemner of him and their doings should not be after the lusts of their own heart that beare sway in the daies of ignorance but I neuer followed other rule then the lusting of mine owne heart I neuer stroue to suppresse and mortifie them Yea my whole course of life doth proue mee to be the child of another father that hath no place in heauen but was cast out thence for sinne The Lord Iesus said vnto the Iewes Ye are of your father the deuill and the lusts of your father yee will doe Much more rightly by triall of my deedes may it bee said to mee thou art of thy father the deull and the lusts of that father of thine thou hast done While my sinnes thus daily come to remembrance how can I cal God my father And who can call God his father that hath not the spirit of God dwelling in him as the seale and earnest of his inheritance of which spirit Paul speaketh thus Yeâ—… haue receiued the spirit of adoption whereby we cry abba father the same spirit beareth witnesse with our spirit that we are the children of God But this spirit dwelleth not in me if this spirit were in me I should feele at one time or other and in one measure or other the comfortable testimony of that spirit but I feele nothing but feareful horror in my conscience oh that I had and might feele the comfort of this spirit my present tentation witnesseth the absence of it Also if I had the spirit of God in mee the fruits of that spirit would bud and shew forth themselues in mee but all is contrary The Apostle Paul saith the fruit of the spirit is loue ioy peace long suffering gentlenesse goodnesse faith meekenesse and temperance There is none of these to be seene in mee but the fruits of the flesh are plentifull in mee With them I am ouergrowen both in body and soule The Apostle reckoneth them vp in this order The workes of the flesh are manifest which are adultery fornication vnclâ—…annesse wantonnesse idolatry witchcraft hatred debate emulation wrath contention seditions herefies enuy murders drunkennesse gluttony and such like And in these sinnes I haue liued and dwelt and delighted if not in all yet in many of them and if not in many yet in some of them inough to quench the spirit of God if the fire thereof had at any time beene kindled in mee How then can it be that I should haue the holy Ghost And not hauing the holy Ghost how can I call God my father and if I haue no right nor power to call God my father that leaue to craue the forgiueuesse of sinnes and that hope to obtaine forgiuenesse of sinnes which are grounded vpon that commandement of Iesus pertaine not to mee Alas how ingenious men are in the daies of affliction when the burden of accusing thoughts lies heauy vpon them to dispute against themselues They haue not vnderstanding enough to apprehend and taste any thing that is spoken for their comfort but they haue wit to finde out and vtterance to pronounce and feruent passion to vrge any thing that may make for their discomfort But let vs helpe to remoue these stumbling-blockes from before these mens feete that they may walke on in hope and come vnto God by praier Thou thinkest that by that commandement of Christ there is giuen to thee no leaue to aske forgiuenesse of sinne â—…orhope to obtaine forgiuenesse of sin because it is to be craued of an heauenly father And thou canst not call God thy heauenly father thou thinkest thâ—… he is not thy father and that thou nâ—… not his sonne And thou hast two reasons to proue this to thine owne heart First because neither thy vertues noâ—… thy actions doe in any thing resemble God but rather proue thee to be the child of another father opposit to God and secondly because thou hast not the spiâ—…it of adoption to crie Abba Father For thou neither feelest the restimony oâ—… that spirit in thine heart neither doest thou see the fruits of that spirit in thy life but al things euery where contrary I mislike not that thou doest holdâ—… meane opinion of thy selfe and censâ—…rest thy selfe vnworthy the title of Godâ—… child and that thou thinkest honorably of the spirituall kinred that is betweene God and his saints But be of good comfort God saâ—…leth not to be thy father because thou thinkest him not to be neither failest thou to be his child because thou darest not thinke thy selfe to bee his child And these words vrged against thy selfe are no other then the words of the prodigall vnthrift spoken of in the Gospell who in his vertues and actions did nothing as yet resemble his father for hee hanted harlots and liued riotously being euery way as sinfull as thou canst with any words make thy selfe and when by aduersity he was brought to consider of his life and estate as thou now doest he had that opinion of himselfe that thou now hast thinking it not fit to take vnto himselfe the title of a sonne His words are thus set downe by Saint Luke I will a rise and goâ—… to my father and say to him father I haue sinned against heauen and before thee and am no more worthy to be called thy sonne Compare thy selfe with him thou canst not be worse then hee not in thy life more vnlike thy heauenly father neither canst thou be in worse case then he was He for sooke his fathers house and was departed far from God knowing very well from whence he was departed Hee neuer had minde to returne backe againe till misery compelled him of whom we neede not feare to say for it is plaine and cleare that no loue to his father nor to his fathers house but pinching necessity and extreame misery made him a conuert And while hee was abroad what was his course the euangelist telleth vs he wâ—…sted his goods with riotous liuing That is all the blessings
not out of any hatred that they did beare against such vile sinnes but onely for feare of the peoples speech and rather for want of meanes and opportunity to accomplish them then for want of any good will if time place and other things had been answerable And if thou finde that thine is such a generall and confused tentation as namely that thou diddest neuer rightly know nor loue nor feare God and that thine heart was alwaies or now is an euill an hypocritical heart thine estate is so much the more easie that in the dayes of thy security while thou diddest walke according to the course of this world and after the prince that ruleth in the ayre euen the spirit that worketh in the children of disobedience God suffered not the Diuell to thrust thee into presumptuous sinnes after the manner of others and into grosse and desperate sinnes against all rules of honesty wherewith hee might now in this time of temptation torment thy conscience This affordeth much aduantage vnto thee that the diuell can finde no grosse particular sinne to vrge and presse thee withall Here let the afflicted man first consider that hitherto his case is no whit worse then the case of euery man that commeth into the world For Dauid doth tell vs that the best man euen he that prooueth afterwards a man after Gods owne heart yet out of his mothers wombe yea out of his fathers loines proceedeth a sinnefull creature with an euill heart empty of the loue of God and continueth so till God bestow some particular grace vpon him for the conuersion of him And he maketh himselfe an instance heereof speaking thus Behold I was borne in iniquity and in sinne hath my mother conceiued me He was from the wombe and loines a sinner taken in generall termes for a man in whom there was an euill heart not knowing not louing not fearing God And Saint Paul doth tell vs that the holiest man euen he that was from the beginning a chosen vessell to beare witnesse to the name of Iesus Christ before kings and nations yet in his originall estate and first yeares hee is the childe of wrath and dead in trespasses and sinnes as all other men till God in mercy looke vpon him and renew him And hee maketh himselfe among others an instance thereof while hee thus speaketh You hath be quickened that were dead in trespasses and sinnes wherein in times past ye walked according to the course of this world and after the Prince that ruleth in the ayre euen the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience among whom wee also had our conuersation in times past in the lusts of our flesh in fulfilling the will of the flesh and of the minde and were by nature the children of wrath as well as others Paul was a bad as the Ephesians and the Ephesians as bad as all other men til God in mercy conuerted both him them And the Prophet Ieremy telleth vs that there is both generally and particularly in all men and in euery man a heart both wicked and hypocritical wicked to do that which is euill deceitfull and hypocriticall to dissemble in the doing of it and to make shews pretences and excuses that it might be thought not to doe euill And this wickednesse and hypocrisie ro be so deepe and cunning that it deceiueth not onely other men but euen the wicked man himselfe that flattereth and pleaseth himself with his owne pretences and perswadeth his owne soule that all is well and onely God is able to finde out his hypocrisie for thus hee saith The heart of man is deceitfull and wicked aboue all things who can know it I the Lord search the heart c. Other men cannot know it and search it out For the apostle saith What man knoweth the things of a man saue the spirit of a man which is in him A manâ—… owne heart may bee acquainted with his owne thoughts but another man cannot discerne them a man himselfe oft times is not able to discerne his owne wickednesse a vaine and false opinion misleading his blinded iudgement but God searcheth it out because as the Apostle saith There is not any creature that is not manifest in his sight but all things are naked and open to his cies with whom we haue to doe Such is the depth of the wickednesse of mans heart such is his deceitfull hypocrisie that no eye but the all-seeing eye of God no iudgement but his that neuer erreth can see the same And Salomon telleth vs that there is no man iust vpon the earth that doth good and sinneth not And knowing this to be generaly true he challengeth euery man that thinkes that he can say any thing to cleere eyther himselfe or any other saying Who can say I haue made my heart cleane I am cleane from my sinne So that this is the condition of all men till God in his mercy mould them anew by his grace till then they are altogether such as thou in thy troubled heart art charged to be men of an euill heart full of wickednesse and hypocrisie that neither know God nor loue God nor feare God Therefore when thou art charged with such a generall and confused tentation yeeld it to be true that thou art charged withall and stand not to make thy selfe better then thou art withall say vnto thy soule for that I haue no more cause to dispaire of Gods mercy then Dauid had that was such a one in his birth then Paul had that was such a one vntill the day of his conuersion then any other and all other of Gods elect and best beloued children that were euery way such conceiued in sinne borne in iniquitie children of wrath full of vnsearchable wickednesse and hypocrisie neither knowing nor liuing nor fearing God till he was pleased to looke vpon them in his fauour and to conuert them by creating a new heart and renewing a right spirit in them And now that mine eyes are opened by this affrighting of my soule to see my bad condition which I saw not before I will make hast vnto the Lord and will craue that grace at his hands that I now want neither can I nor will I vnderstand this worke of his in letting me see by this fearefull temptation my sinfull estate which in the daies of my peace I did not see to be any other then the fruit of his loue by making me to see my misery to stir vp my soule long drowned in former securitie to seeke with all earnestnes of â—…eale for his help When a sicke man feeleth paine in his flesh he doeth not faintly yeeld to death because he is sicke but from the feeling of his weakenes he taketh occasion to seeke out some learned Phisition craueth his help the more sicke he is the more he desireth and the more earnestly he sueth for his helpe spares no cost and putteth himselfe into
to the outward man and the other is the holy-Ghost who opening the vnderstanding and leading into all truth doth beare witnes to the inward man Now for seed we know that when it is cast into the ground it doeth not presently bring forth ripe fruit nay it doth not presently spring vp and shew it selfe but it resteth for a while in the wombe of the earth hidden from the eyes of men till conuenient time commeth and if any man in the mean time should say I see no fruit aboue the ground therefore there is no seede in the ground hee might be deceiued and the Husbandman and Gardner that had sowne the ground would censure him both of ignorance and boldnesse and time would disprooue him And as for witnesses we know that they do not speake so soone as a man is prouided of thē nor yet so soon as they appeare in publique place but being first prepared and after brought to the place where they should giue testimony they yet stay and keep silence and when the Iudge or Examiner is at leisure then they are called for and speak their knowledge And he that reasons thus there hath yet no witnesse spoken forsuch a mā therfore he hath no witnesse to speake at all for him should shew himselfe a rash man and by the timely voyce of the witnesses would be conuinced Euen so it is too much rashnesse in thee to say that because thou yet hearrest not the testimonie of the Holie-Ghost in thy heart witnessing with thy spirit that thou art the child of God therefore there is no such witnesse at al to speake when God shall appoint And because thou yet seest not the fruits of the spirit in the actions of thy life that therefore there is in thee no seed of the Spirit that may bring forth these fruits in due time Learne to haue patience wait vpon the good pleasure of God in time thou shalt see a blessed chāge heare that testimonie which yet thou hearest not and see those fruits of the Spirit which yet thou seest not And if it were as thou speakest that thou hadst not at all the Spirite as seed lying in secret and attending the time of Spring or as a witnesse prepared to speake when God shal call him fo◅th to giue his testimonie yet the Spirit that is not receiued may be receiued and shall be giuen thee if thou pray vnto God for it We know the words of the Lord Iesus Christ in the Gospel If you which are euill can giue good gifts to your children how much more shall your heauenly Father giue the holy-Ghost to them that desire him So that if there be in thee a true desire to obtaine the holy-Ghost aske and it shall be giuen thee for the Lord is more ready to giue then thou canst be to aske All that matter therefore of thy feare for that commandement of Christ that giueth leaue to ask and hope to obtaine forgiuenesse of sins that it should not belong to thee because it must be asked of them that haue God for their Father and thou thinkest him not to be thy Father because thou doest neither resemble him as yet either in the verues of thy mind or actions of thy life and thou hast not the spirit of adoption by which thou maiest cry Abba Father for thou neither seest the fruits nor feelest the testimonies of that spirit all this matter of thy feare is vaine That commandement of Christ belongeth to thee God is thy Father thou oughtest to pray vnto him for forgiuenesse thou maiest pray vnto him for forgiuenesse and if thou pray thou shalt obtaine forgiuenesse Pray therefore as Christ hath commanded thee and the obseruation of his order shall prooue thine ease CHAP. XX. OVr afflicted sinner was incouraged to pray and to hope for forgiuenesse of his sinnes not onely by the commandement of Iesus Christ which giueth leaue and hope but also and more strongly by the promise of God assuring in plaine words that it shall bee granted to him I will forgiue their iniquitie and will remember their sinnes no more But the nature of his temptation suffering no comfort to enter and abide with him armeth him with an obiection against that incouragement in this manner I know that God hath made such a liberall promise I know that he made it aduisedly vnderstanding himselfe what he promised that hee made it in truth meaning to performe faithfully as much as hee promised and that he remembers his promise for euer for time can not worke forgetfulnesse in him nor any shadow of alteration and therefore it shall be most truely and fully performed But it pertaineth not to mee for any aduantage and benefit of mine for the Prophet telleth vs it is a couenant made with the house of Israel for these are his words This shall be the couenant that I will make with the house of Israel after those dayes saith the Lord. But I am no Israelite howsoeuer you shall take the name for if you vnderstand it in the naturall signification for the children of Iacob in the twelue Tribes of Israel I am not of that kinred I am of the Gentiles And if I were naturally of the seed of Israel yet might I very well loose all lawfull challenge to that promise because Saint Paul saith All they are not Israel which are of Israel But if you take the name in the spiritual signification for a child of promise an heire of grace and a preuailer with God and in that sence was it first giuen to Iacob when he wrestled with the Angell and preuailed not letting him goe vntill hee had blessed him in this signification It doth yet much lesse agree to mee that am rather an Egyptian a Cananite an Edomite and an enimie of God rather then a preuailer with him I neuer wrestled with God by faith and praier as Iacob to preuaile with him but rather I haue wrestled with God by pride and malice as a professed aduersarie I haue bidden defiance to God in the contempt of my proud heart I haue made fierce war against God in my many sinnes striuing to preuaile against him neuer desiring to preuaile with him and thence is it that now in iustice and power hee beareth himselfe so strongly against me Therefore being no way an Israelite and that couenant wherein God promiseth to forgiue and forget sinnes being made with the house of Israel what claime can I make to that promise euen none at all The nature of this disease is very strange that turneth into poison what soeuer is applyed to it by way of medicine or at least way striueth to extinguish all the vertue of those medicines least it might bee cured But this must moue vs to haue the more compassion and to take the more paine to see if God at the last will send comfort and sauing health Thou thinkest that this promise of forgiuing and forgetting sinnes doeth
records belonging to the Church of God and to the people that â—…tend to haue any knowledge of God hoâ—… many hath he heard 〈◊〉 that did so and what were they in the first age of the world that lasted from the creation to the sloud sixteene hundred fifty and 〈◊〉 yeares we read of much wickednesse â—…ow Kain vnnaturally killed his brother Habel how Lamech transgressed Gods ordinance for mariage and gloried in â—…is owne cruelty saying to his wiues in his wicked pride I would stay a man in 〈◊〉 wound and a young man in mine heart We read of the carnal licenciousnesse of the men of the best line How the sonnes of God saw the daughters of men that they were faire and they looks them wiues of all that they liked Yea of the whole race of mankind we reade that the earth was corrupt before God for the earth was filled with cruelty then God looked vpon the earth and behold it was corrupt for al flesh had corrupted his way vpon the earth And their wickednesse was so vile in the sight of God that hee repented to hane made man vpon the earth and hee brought a floud vpon the earth where with he destroied euery creature in whose nostrels was the breath of life And in all this time it is not read that any grew vnto this height of wickednes to incroch so farre vpon the right of God and to be so vnnaturally sinfull as to kill him selfe In so many yeares the Deuill that was a murderer from the beginning could not preuaile so far among the most wicked as to perswade any to lay violent hands vpon himselfe This wickednesse was then vnknowen from the floud to the natiuity of our Lord Iesus Christ for the space of two thousand three hundred and eleuen yeares wee read of horrible wickednesse of warre among natiâ—…s of the tyranny of Nimrod of â—…e building of Babel of the vncleaâ—…esse of the Sodomites of the slaughter of the Sichemites of the tyranny of Phaâ—… of the sinne of the Cananites of the â—…bellion of Korah of the couetousnesse 〈◊〉 Balaam of the sornication of Zimri 〈◊〉 infinit vngodlinesse in euery age of 〈◊〉 in euery generation but of this â—…ind of vnnaturalnesse for men to lay â—…iolent hands vpon themselues we haue 〈◊〉 few examples Saul fell vpon his owne sword and killed himself because â—…e would not come aliue into the hands of the Philistims that preuailed against â—…im in battell and his Armour-bearer â—…couraged by his Lords example did â—…e like vnto himselfe And not many â—…eares after Ahitophel the great counâ—…ller that followed Absolom vpon discontent left Absolom went home to his â—…ne house and hanged himselfe We â—…ad of a fourth whose name was Zimri â—…at being besieged in Tirzah and not able to defend himselfe and the place â—…ent into the Kings Palace and setting the house on fire burned himselfe and these are all that the Scripture recordeth guilty of this impiety for we are not to number Sampson among them whose purpose was not to kill himselfe but to execute the iudgement of God vpon the Philistins which was a worke of his calling in the faithfull and zealous performance whereof hee lost his life And I wittingly passe ouer the history of Razis that fell on his sword and slew himselfe that he might not come aliue into the hands of them whom 〈◊〉 sent to take him leauing the credit of that History to the authority of the writer Whom yet if wee adde to the former the number is not much increased by him So few they were in so many yeeres with whom the ancient murderer could 〈◊〉 to make them enemies of their owne 〈◊〉 And if we consider what manner persons they were with whom he did so far preuaile their wickednesse will seâ—…e to warne any man that hath any dram either of piety or wisdome or care of his owne credit not to put himselfe into the company and ranke of them Saul was a man enuious traiterous perfidious cruell and profane His enuy appeared in this that hee hated Dauid because the Lord prospered him and because the people lioâ—…oured him for that and for no other cause did hee seeke to take away his life His traiterous minde appeared in this that vnder pretences of loue shâ—…wes of the greatest fauour hee sought to kill Dauid giuing his daughter Michol to Dauid to be his wife that she might be the traine to destroy him How persidious and false of faith he was appeared in this that often giuing his promse to Dauid to doe him no harme and giuing it into him aduisedly vpon sight and proofe of Dauids innocency and faith to him he yet euer brake it and vppon euery the least opportunity went out against him with his Army to take him His cruelty appeareth in this besides other proofes thereof that vpon the report of Doeg telling him that Ahimelech the Priest had asked counsel of the Lord for Dauid and had giuen him victuals and the sword of Goliah hee sent for Ahimelech and all the Priests of his fathers house euen fowre-score and fiue men and caused them all to be slaine and destroied also Nob the City of the Priests where Ahimelech dwelt â—…miting with the edge of the sword both man and woman both child and suckling both Oxe and Asse and sheepe with the edge of the sword in most barbarous and inhumane cruelty How profane hee was without due feare and reuerence of God the former act done vpon the Priests of the Lord without regard of the seruice whereunto they were separated to minister at the Altar of the Lord doth plainly show And his preuenting the time appointed of God in offering his Sacrifice when the people were scattered from him and Samuel was not come vnto him But chiefly his profanenesse appeared in consulting with the Witch at Endor As it is written of him Saul said vnto his seruants seeke mee a woman that hath a familiar spirit that I may goe to her and aske of her and his seruants said to him behold there is a woman at Endor that hath a familiar spirit then Saul changed himselfe and put on other raiment and he went and two men with him and they came to the woman by night and he said I pray thee coniure unto 〈◊〉 by the familiar spirit and bring me him vp whom I shall name vnto thee This is an â—…sallible argument of a most profane heart in times of trouble and danger to 〈◊〉 helpe of the Deuill to place hope in him to regard his word and answer These things ought to bee done vnto God onely his helpe onely should be sought in the time of danger in his merâ—…y and truth onely wee ought to trust 〈◊〉 to giue credit to his word which shall stand for euer and from the God of truth to 〈◊〉 for counsell to the father of lies and from the Sauiour to flie for helpe to the destroyer