I do think my Sins are so great that it is impossible for them to be pardoned J. Do not think or say so for all things are possible to him that believeth Mark 9.23 P. But my Sins are so red I think all the Water in the Sea cannot wash them away J. Though thy Sins be as Scarlet they shall be as white as Snow and though they be red like Crimson they shall be as Wool if thou wilt turn to me from them for my Blood can cleanse thee from all Sin Esa 1.18 1 John 1.7 P. But Lord if I should turn to thee from them yet they are written down and thou wilt not blot them out Jer. 18.23 J. I am he that bloteth out thy transgressions yea have bloted out as a thick cloud thy transgressions and as a Cloud thy Sins return therefore unto me for I have redeemed thee Esa 43.25 44.22 P. But if I should return unto thee yet when I Sin again thou wilt remember my Sins J. No I will pardon thee and thy Sins and iniquities will I remember no more Heb. 10.17 P. Oh Lord I am the child of wicked parents and thou hast said thou wilt visit the Sins of the Father upon the Children to the third and fourth generation J. If a wicked Father begets a Son that seeth all his Fathers Sins which he hath done and considereth and doth not such like that Son shall not bare the iniquity of the Father Ezek. 18.14.20 Ezek. 16.3 to the 13. P. But Lord were there any wicked parents that had good Children J. Yes many as wicked a Ahaz had good Hezekiah So b Idolutrous Amon zealous Josiah and ungodly Saul had Godly Jonathan a 2 Kin. 16.20 with 2 Kin. 18.3 b 2 Kin. 21.21 22. with 2 King 22 2. P. Lord what if I be a Bastard and the Child of whoredom J. That doth not hinder thee neither to be saved for my servant c Jeptha was a Bastard so was my servant Phares who is reckoned in my own Genealogie Compare Gen. 38.18 29. Ruth 4.12 with Mat. 1.3 c Jud. 11.1 with Heb. 11.32 P. But Lord is there not such a Scripture that a Bastard shall not enter into thy Congregation until the tenth Generation J. Yes there is such a d Scripture and that should make People shun the Sin of Whoredome but that doth not exclude men that are born Bastards after the Flesh if they be Born again of the Spirit either out of my Church on Earth now in the days of the Gospel or yet out of Heaven Deut. 23.2 P. But what Lord if my Father was a Bastard J. Neither doth that hinder for Sarah the brother of Phares who was a Bastard begot my two wise and Godly Servants Ethan and Heman compare Gen. 38.30 1 Chron. 26. with Psal 88. and Psal 89. the titles of both being of Heman and Ethan P. Oh Lord I am a very old Sinner and have one foot already in the Grave and I fear it is too late for me now to be called J. No it is not too late for I call some at the ninth hour yea some at the e eleventh hour Which is but one hour before night or a little before death And I will pour out of my Spirit upon old men in these Gospel daies Mat. 20.6.9 Joel 2.28 with Act. 2.17 P. But Lord I have committed such great and hainous Sins both by speaking and doing that I am affraid it is in vain for me to seek Mercy J. Though thou hast spoken and done evil things as much as thou couldest yet return unto me and I will not cause mine anger to fall upon thee for I am merciful Jer. 3.5 P. How shall I look upon thee Gracious Lord for I have multiplied sins against thee J. As thou hast multiplied sin so will I (f) Or will abundantly pardon multiply pardons if thou wilt return unto me the Lord Esa 55.7 P. Oh but Lord I scarce think that any so wicked as my self were saved for I was an Idolater an Adulterer a Thief a Drunkard and what not that was wicked J. Such were many of my servants that are now in heaven but I according to my own kindness and pitty to them saved them by washing sanctifying and justifying them by my own (g) Or power Name Blood and Spirit 1 Cor. 9.6 9 10 11. Tit. 3.3 4 5 6 7. P. Oh but merciful Saviour I was a Ring-leader of others into sin and I enticed and drew many into wickedness and therfore my case is far worse then others J. As thou wast a Ring-leader and Enticer of others into sin so I can make thee a guide and leader of others into and in the way of righteousness as I made thy Country-man Levi and others P. But that which makes me fear most is because I was a Blasphemer Reviler and Persecuter of thy people yea many of thy Saints did I shut up in Prison J. Yet thou shalt have mercy because thou didst it ignorantly through unbeliefe 1 Tim. 1.13 P. Oh but Lord I finde my heart is hardened through the deceitfulness and custome of sin that I cannot hope it will ever be otherwise J. I can and will take the stony heart out of thy flesh and I will give thee a heart of flesh Eze. 36.26 P. Lord wilt thou do all for me J. I must do all for thee for without me thou canst do nothing Phil. 2.13 Joh. 15.5 P Lord what then shall I do J. Before I teach thee what thou must do I will first shew thee what I have done and suffered for thee P. Good Master I desire to know that J. 1. I left my own glory and came into the world to save thee and such sinners as thou art John 17.5 1 Tim. 1.15 2. Though I was the onely Son of my Father and in his own form and equal to him yet I took upon me the form of a servant for thee and thy brethrens sake Joh. 1.14 Phil. 2.6 7 8. 3. Though I was Heire of all things and Possessor of Heaven and Earth yet I became poor and hungary that thou mightest be made rich Heb. 1.2 Gen. 14.19 and 2 Cor. 8.9 4. Though I deserved honour and glory yet I was reviled threatned and perscuted by my own Creatures and all for my good will to thee Heb. 2.9 1 Pet. 2.23 5. Though I had no sin yet I was made sin that thou poor sinner mightest escape sin 1 Pet. 1.19 and 2.22 2 Cor. 1.21 6. Though I was a Law-giver and Law-maker yet I became under the curse of my own Law that I might redeem thee from that curse Esa 33.22 Gal. 3.13 7. When I had power over mine own life and no man could take it from me yet I laid it down for thee that thou mightest have life Joh. 10.18 Rom. 5.6.9 1 Joh. 3.16 8. Though I was my fathers delight and an object of his love from everlasting yet I became an object of his wrath for my love
to thee Prov. 8.30 Psa 88.16 102.10 9. When thou wast an enemy and stranger to God my Father I made peace between him and thee and reconciled thee to him by my death and sufferings Rom. 5.10 Col. 1.20.21 Eph. 2.12 13. 10. When thou wert a slave to the Devil and a fire-brand of Hell I did rescue thee from the power of the one and redeem thee from the plague and punnishment of the other 2 Tim. 2.25 Amos. 4.11 Heb. 2.14 1 Thes 1.10 P. Oh Lord I did not deserve any of this from thee J. True thou didst not deserve it but yet I did it freely and out of my love to thee Rom. 3.24 Eph. 5.2 P. Are all my sins Lord satisfied for and done a way by thy death J. Yes they are perfectly satisfied for and absolutely done away out of my fathers sight never to be imputed again to thee 2 Cor. 5.19 P. And is there nothing now in the way that hinders me to be saved J. No there is nothing for I have taken all things out of the way that hindred thee to be saved Col. 2.14 P. And am I to do nothing to be saved J. No nothing at all towards thy own salvation for I have bought thee from death and purchased thee life and salvation 1 Cor. 6.20 1 Pet. 1.18 19. Eph. 1.14 P. Shall I then be saved Lord J. Yes if thou wilt believe and trust wholly and only upon me and upon my righteousness and merits thou shalt be saved Joh. 3.36 Rom. 9.33 and Rom. 10.9.11 P. Lord I would believe but I partly am afraid to believe and partly I am so weak I cannot believe J. Thou poor fearful heart fear not but be strong Esa 35.4 But tell me why thou are afaid P. Least I should presume or least I should believe and have no ground for my faith J. It is not presumption for thee to do what I command thee but it is obedience and is not my word of promise a sufficient ground for thy faith 1 Joh. 3.23 Joh. 5.24 P. Doest thou then Lord command me to believe J. Yes fear not believe on me and thou shalt be saved Lu. 8.50 with Act. 16.31 P. But Lord though thou commandest me yet I have no power to believe J. I will write my Laws in thy heart and will inable and give thee power to believe Heb. 8.10 Mat. 12.21 P. Lord if thou wilt also give me power to believe I will acknowledg I am nothing but what I am in thee and that I have nothing but what I have received from thee J. Doest thou not believe P. Oh yes now Lord I do believe Joh. 9.38 J. This is the work and gift of God that thou doest believe for flesh and blood hath not wrought this in thee Joh. 6.29 Eph. 2.8 P. Oh Lord I do acknowledg it to be thy work but I am afraid I shall loose this faith again J. I that am the Authour of thy faith will also finish it be therefore of good chear for thou art one of my Fathers children and of my Saints and my spirit shall abide in thee for ever Heb. 12.2 Joh. 1.12 Joh. 4.14 John 7.38 39. P. Lord I have sinned against thy Father and against thee and I am unworthy to be called either his Son or thy Servant Luk. 15.21 J. Son thy sins are forgiven thee sin no more Luk. 5.23 John 8.11 P. Lord I am afraid I shall sin again though I desire and resolve never to do it But what Lord if I should sin against my will J. Thou canst not sin willingly and wilfully for my seed of grace will remain in thee and if thou sinnest through weakeness and frailty I will be an Advocate propitiation for thy sins 1 Joh. 3.9 1 Joh. 2.12 P. Is it then thy will Lord that I should have forgiveness of my sins and doubt no more J. Yes sure for these things have I spoken that thou shouldest have a full assurance and doubt no more P. But what if Sathan when he sees me sin will tempt me to doubt again J. Say unto him that I am faithful and just to forgive thee thy sins and that my blood cleanseth thee from all sin 1 Joh. 17. P. But Lord wilt not thou have me to confess my sins J. Yes I will have thee confess them and forsake them 1 Joh. 1.9 Prov. 28.13 P. But Lord is it thy mind that I should always be sorrowful J. No but it is my mind rather that thou shouldest always rejoyce and have strong consolation Phil. 4.4 Heb. 6.18 P. Oh Lord I cannot chuse but cry and mourn and be ashamed and hate my self for all my former wickedness and ungodliness Ezek. 16.61 J. Thou maiest do that and yet hold fast thy confidence for the spirit of mourning and the spirit of grace and adoption may be in thy heart at once and the one not destroy the other Zac. 12.10 P. Lord how is that J. Thou maist mourn at the sight of thy sins as they were committed against me and for thy denying felling and crucifying me and yet thou maiest believe because I have said so that they are all pardoned As Josephs brethren cryed and complained for their guiltiness in selling him yet they were glad that he was alive and could help them in their distress Gen. 42.21 22. P. Now Lord thou hast taught me what I should do in respect of my self but now Lord I would do something for thee J. Come then and follow me Mat. 9 9. And be arose and followed him The second Conference between Christ and a Pharisee Pharisee THen one of the Pharisees came to him and asked him what shall I do to work the work of God John 6.28 Jesus This is the work of God that thou believe in him viz. me whom he hath sent Joh. 6.29 Ph. But Master what good thing shall I do that I may have eternal life Mat. 19.16 J. If thou wilt be saved by doing then keep the Commandements Ph. I have kept them all from my youth Mat. 19 20. J. Then thou art no sinner Ph. Yes we are all sinners but I thank God I am not as other men are Extortioners Unjust Adulterers or even as this Publican Luke 18.11 J. Why what doest thou more than this Publican Ph. I fast twice in the week and give tithes of all that I possess and concerning the Law I live blameless Luk. 18.12 Phil. 3.6 J. Hast thou never read that they which followed after the Law of Righteousness have not attained to the Law of Righteousness Rom. 9.31 Ph. No I never observed that but I remember another text where God saith I gave them my Satutes and shewed them my Judgments which if a man do he shall live in them Ezek. 20.11 J. Daest thou think to go to heaven by doing Ph. Not by doing only but by doing good and departing from evil J. But doth not the Law say cursed is he that observeth not all things that are written in the words
Sin was in power in Paul when it could carry him captive and sold under sin and that he found a law in his members warring against the law of his mind and bringing him into captivity to the law of sin Rom. 14.23 Christian Oh but neither Paul nor any other Saint hath sinned presumptuously as I have done Ch. My servant David pray'd that he might be kept from presumptuous sins for he was subject thereunto Ps 19.13 It is probable that David sined presumptuously in kiling Vriah and so are the best of my Saints Christi But Lord I have rebelled against thee Ch. So did my servants of ‖ old but I have received ‖ gifts for the Rebellious and to me belongs mercies and forgiveness though thou hast rebelled against me Dan. 9 9 ‖ Is 1.2 and 63.20 ‖ Is 68.18 Christian Oh but my Rebellion is the worst Rebellion of all for I have rebelled against the light I have professed thee and yet I have belied thee and made an hypocritical profession I seemed like Judas to be thy friend whilst in my heart I did not love thee Ch. The house of Israel and the house of Judah dealt treacherously against me the Lord and belied me and Ephraim my dear Son compassed me about with lies yet was I gracious to them Jer. 5.11.12 Hos 11.12 with Jer. 23.6 and 31.20 Christian But Lord Ephraim was never so wicked as I am and guilty of such Lukewarmness Hypocrisie and Backsliding as I am guilty of Ch. Yea Ephraim was a cake not turned And Ephraim fed upon winds and provoked me to anger most bitterly yet my bowels did still worke toward Ephraim that I could not destroy him Hos 8.8 and 12.1.14 with 11.8 Christian But I increased in sin and the more mercies I received the more my heart was exalted Ch. Even so did Ephraim sin more and more according as he was filled so his heart was exalted Hos 13.2 6. Christian But Lord what didst thou do to Ephraim Ch. I drew them with the cords of man and with bands of love and I was as the dew unto them Heb. 11.4 and 14.5 Christian Oh but I have forsaken the Lord and backslided from thee Ch. So did Israel and Judah Jer. 2 13. and 3.6 and 4.16 Christian But Lord I find that my heart is bent to continual backsliding yea my bakslidings are encreased Ch. So were ‖ they yet I healed their backslidings so will I heal thine also Hos 14.4 Jer. 3.14.22 ‖ Hos 11.7 Jer. 5.6 Christian But I have fell into gross sins that hath dishonoured thee and caused thine enemies to blaspheme Ch. So did my servant David 2 Sam. 12.14 and others of my Saints Christian I but then he did mourn and repent greatly for his sins but I cannot do so for I find my heart as hard as an Adamant Ch. So my people Israels hearts formerly were as hard as a Rock Adamant and Flint Jer. 5.3 Ezek. 3.9 Christian Oh but I have been long yea ever troubled with this hardness of heart Ch. Though thou hast yet I will take the stony heart out of thy flesh and I will give thee a heart of flesh Ezek. 36.26 Christian But I cannot repent me of the hardness of my heart Ch. What though yet I am exalted to give repentance unto thee Act. 5.31 Christian Oh but I do not find that I am sensible enough of my sin for if I were I should mourn and be ashamed for all the wickedness which I have committed against thee Ch. When thou doest see me whom thou hast pierced and when thou seest that I am pacified towards thee then thou shalt mourn loath thy self and be ashamed for all thy sins and abominations which thou hast committed against me Rev. 1.7 Ezek. 6.9 and 16.63 Christian But Lord I am a very great sinner and I would fain see the nature and number of my sins that I might truly repent me of them and be humbled for them Ch. If thou see all thy sins with their nature number and aggravations thou couldst never look upon them but with despair as Cain and Judas And it is not so much the sight of sin as the sight of my Love Grace Goodness and Glory that will lead thee to repentance and humble thee for thy sins Luk. 7.42.47 Zach. 12.10 Rom. 2.4 Esa 6.5 Gen. 4.13 Mat. 27.3 4 5. Christian Oh Lord I know I am as wicked a sinner and as ungodly a wretch as ever lived but though I know this yet methinks I am not broken with the sence thereof I cannot weep nor shed tears for my sins Oh no! I go many times to prayer and to hear Sermons and there is no more working nor relenting upon my soul then if I were a dead stock or stone Ch. Oh my dear soul do not thou belie thy self for I have heard many a sorrowful sigh comming from thy heart and I have seen many a teare drop from thine Eyes and I will yet pour out more of the Spirit of mourning upon thee But what if thou didst noâ— find these things in thy self yet I have offered up strong cries and teares unto my Father for thee Ezek. 9.4 Psal 34.17 Zack 12.11 Heb. 5.7 Christian Oh Lord that I had but faith to believe that I for my selfe Ch. Have faith in me and be not faithless but believing Mat. 11.22 Joh. 20.27 Christian Lord I find sâ— much Atheism and unbelief in my heart that I have oftentimes questionings in my selfe concerning God and concerning the Scriptures and word of God Ch. These are the temptations and suggestions of Satan and my own Disciples were and are troubled with them Luk. 24.25 Christian Oh Lord I am troubled with a thousand temptations Ch. Yet fear not my loving and dear Child for thou hast divers temptations yet it is that which my best Saints have had and I will not suffer thee to be tempted above what thou art able but I will succour thee in thy temptations and I will make a way that thou shalt escape and be delivered out of temptations Jam. 1 2.1â— Cor. 10.13 Heb. 2.18 2 Pet. 2.9 Christian But I think nâ— Saint hath such temptations aâ—â— mine for sometimes I am tempted to kill my selfe and sometimes to kill others in so much that I cannot look upon any weapon waters or the like but I am ready to do my self away therewith Ch. Satan tempted me to cast my selfe off the Pinacle of the Temple and he also tempted many of my dear Children to destroy themselves but do not thou harken to the Accuser for he doth accuse thee to me and me to thee but rather say unto him Satan it is written my Lord Jesus hath over-come thee and I hope through his blood and through his might and spirit to overcome thee likewise say also my God hath commanded me not to kill another nor to do hurt or violence to my selfe therefore get thee behind me thou Lier Murtherer and Enemy for I will put my trust in
thou hast and take up thy crosse daily and follow me else thou canst not be my Disciple Luke 14.26 27. Ph. This is a hard saying who can hear it and he went away sorrowful and followed him no more Joh. 6.60.66 Mat. 19.22 The third Conference between Christ and a doubting Christian Christ COme unto me all ye that labour and are heavy laden and I will give you rest Mat. 11.28 Christian Oh Lord I am a poor heavy laden sinner that would come unto thee but cannot come Ch. It is true O soul no man can come unto me except the Father which hath sent me draw him Joh. 6.44 Christian How then Lord shall I come unto thee Ch. I and my Father are one and we give power to the faint and to them that have no might we add strength Joh. 10.30 Esay 40 29. Christian Lord I am altogether without strength therefore draw me unto thee and I will come Ch. I will draw thee unto me with the cords oâ— a man with bands of love and with loving kindness Hos 11.4 Jer. 31.3 Joh. 12.32 Christian But Lord noâ— I look upon my selfe I see I am unworthy to come unto thee yea unworthy of the least of thy mercies Ch. So said my servant a John the Baptist and b Jacob and c others yet do not judge thy selse as the d Jewes did unworthy of eternal life a Mat. 3.11.6 b Gen. 32.10 c Luk. 7.7 Mat. 8.8 d Acts 13.46 Christian Iâ— such men as John Baptist and Jacob did judge themselves unworthy how many thousand times more unworthy am I a wretched and wicked sinner Ch. It is true neither they nor thou could be worthy of your selves but yet I am willing to account you worthy As the prodigals Father did his Son Luk. 15.21 22. Luk. 20.35 and 21.36 Rev. 3.4 Christi But Lord if therâ— were any thing that were good in me it might a little incourage me to come unto thee but I find nothing but evil in me Ch. Dost thou not knowâ— that without me thou canst e do nothing and that a man can f receive nothing except it be giveâ— him from heaven Why theâ— dost thou stay away from me who must g work all thy workes in thee And c Joh. 15.5 f Joh. 3.27 g Esa 26.12 2 12. 2. Because thou seest nothing but evil in thee thou shouldst thee rather come unto me who am the h Fountain wherein thy unclean soul must be washed and unless I i wash thee thou canst not be clean nor have any k part in me h Zac 13.1 i Eze. 36.25 and 1.9 k Joh. 13.8 Christian True Lord thou art the Fountain and welspring of life and it is thy blood and nothing else that can wash a way my sins but how can I come near to thee who am so wicked that for â—ught I know have counted thy blood an l unholy thing l Heb. 10.29 Ch. Thou poor dear and doubting soul what if thou hadst had a hand in crucifying me as the Jewes had yet cannot I forgive thee as I did many of them But thou hast not counted my blood an unholy thing for thou still desirest to have thy sins washed away by it Act. 2.36.41 Christian What the Jewes did they did ignorantly but I have sinned against knowledge which makes my sins worse then theirs Ch. If thou hast sinned against knowledge ye thou hast not sinned so but that thou maist be forgiven For my dear Disciple Peter sinned against knowledg when he denied with an oath that he knew me not Mat. 26.72 Christian Oh but yet my sins are worse then his for his sin was but one sin and that a suddain and short sin but I have sinned many sins and continued long in them Ch. So did my beloved servant David who was a man according to my own heart commit several sins together as Murther Whoredome c. and continued a while too in his sins Christian Oh but Lord those servants of thine though they sinned against thee yet they expressed a great deal of sence of their sins and sorrow for them but I can neither be sensible of nor sorrowful for mine Ch. Oh sweet soul thou mistakest and forgettest thy selfe for thou dost often confess thy sins before me with sence shame and sorrow And I hear the daily bemoaning and complaining and saying I have n sinned against the Lord woe is me for I am undone n Job 7 20. Psal 51.4 Lam. 5.16 Christian Oh good Lord it is not without a cause that I cry woe is me I am undone for I think there is no soul in such a dangerous and desperate condition as mine is in Ch. Why doest thou think and say so Christian Because I have sinned that unpardonable sin against thy spirit Ch. Oh thou poor and precious soul thou dost but think so and fear so But tell me how canst thou sin that sin against my Spirit and yet pray for more of my Spirit and so much prize my Spirit as thou dost Christian Oh Lord I have often grieved and quenched thy Spirit and is not this to commit that unpardonable sin Ch. My own dear and loving children may and do sometimes grieve my spirit by sining and quench the gracious motions of it and yet do not sin that unpardonable sin Eph. 4.30 1 Thes 5.19 Esay 63.10 Christian Oh but I can â—â—â—nk no less but that I have â—â—â—â—â—red that sin for I have had hard cruel and desperate thoughts in my heart against the Holy Spirit Ch. Though my child thoâ— hast had such thoughts in thy 〈◊〉 yet thou hast noâ—â—â—oken evil of my Spirit as the Jewes did which is the sin of blasphemy and that unpardonable sin Mat. 12.24 28 31. Mark 3.22 to 30. Christian Lord I am not sure but that I have spoken evil words of thy spirit for I know I have many times uttered vile bitter and cursed words Ch. Notwithstanding thou didest through the violence of thy temptations and in the bitterness of thy Soul speak such words as my servants Job David Jeremy Jonah and Peter did yet thou hast not done despightfully nor sinned maliciously and wilfully against my Spirit of grace as Reprobates doe Heb. 10.29 Job 3. to 13. and 10.18 and 23.15 16. Psa 31.22 and 116.11 Jer. 20.14 c. Jonah 4.3 4 9. Mat. 26 27 74. Christian Oh I have been and still am very wilful and have often sinned wilfully and thou sayest in thy word that if any sin wilfully after they receive the knowledge of the truth their remaineth no more sacrifice for sins Heb. 10.6 Ch. Thou dear soul have not I heard thee often in prayer complaining of and bewailing thy sins and beging earnestly for power against them therefore it is rather against thy will then wilfully that thou dost sin Christian Oh but I find sins in power in my soul which if I were a Saint they would not be so Ch. My servant Paul found sin so strong in him that he confessed he was carnal
Christ though he kill me and I will endeavour to live to serve him though he should afterwards damn me Mat. 4.5 Rev. 12.10 Job 12.13 Exod. 20.13 Act. 16.28 Job 13.15 Christian Though I dâ— sometimes resolve against Satans temptations and labour to resist them yet I find my temptations are renewed and I am not able to withstand them for they come in as a flood upon me Ch. I that say unto the proud waves hitherto shalt thou come but no further I will by my spirit put the Enemy Satan to flight when he comes in like a flood against thee Job 38.11 See Esa 59.19 Marg. Christian But Lord I find am not only troubled with fear and sad temptations but also with strong and powerful corruptions Ch. I will subdue all thy iniquities and thy sins shall not have dominion over thee Mich. 7.19 Rom. 6.14 Christian Oh but this doth much trouble me that I do not find any love in my heart to thee Ch. What though thou dost not yet I will circumcise thy heart and thou shalt love me and when thou apprehendest my love to thee thou wilt love me again Deut. 30.6 1 Job 40.19 Christian I have sinned Lord against thy mercies and abased thy love yea loveâ— my sins more then thee therefore I cannot think that eveâ— thou wilt look upon me with any love or delight Ch. So did my servant David and my people Israel do yet as I loved them so will I love theâ— freely and betroth theâ— to me in loving kindnesâ— and mercy 2 Sam 12.8 9. Hos 2.5 and 14.4 and 2.9 Christian But Lord â— have not only sin'd against thy mercies but against thy corrections and chastisements also Ch. So did my people Israel formerly do for when I smote them they went on forwardly in the way of their evil hearts but I led them and restored comforts to them Esa 57.17.18 Christian I but my condition is worse then all that for I have been long under the means of grace and yet I am altogether fruitless and like the barren Fig-tree Ch. Thou troubled soul in me is thy fruit found and I will purge thee and thou shalt bring forth fruit abundantly for they that are planted in my house shall flourish and be fat and like a green Olive Tree Joh. 15.5 Psal 92.12 13 14. Christian I Lord its true if I were a branch in thee and a true member of thy house then I could believe these promises of thine alas I am neither of both but separated from thee and thy people C. Do not say that thou art none of mine for â— have bought thee with my blood and do not speak that thou art separated from my people for I will give thee in mine house and within my walls a place and a name of Sonâ— and Daughters Esa 56.3.5 Christian Sure if I were not an out-cast and a Reprobate I should not be thus as I am in a wilderness condition Ch. Israel was counted an out-cast and she cried out yet I was then a God to her and she a people to me Jer. 30.16.17.22 Christian Oh if I were but one of thine I should then count my self the happiest in all the world Ch. Fear not my Spouse for I am thy Husband and thy Father Christian If I were one of thy Children thou wouldst not hide thy selfe from me as thou dost Ch. I have hid my selfe and my face from some of my Prophers and people of old and yet it was in love to them and so it is to thee Psal 88.14 Esa 8.17 and 64.7 Christian But thou hast hid thy self from me and thou seemest also to be angry with me Esa 54.5 Jer. 31.9 Ch. Fury is not with me towards thee and though I be angry yet my anger is but for a moment Esa 27.4 and 54.8 Christian Yet Lord thou hast been angry with me a long time for thou hast forgotten me Ch. Zion did say so the Lord hath forsaken me and my Lord hath forgotten me yet I had not forgot her for she was graven upon the palmes of my hands Esa 49.14.15 Jer. 51.5 Christian But Lord if thou had'st not forgotten me thou would'st never have left me in such a wilderness and barren condition as I am in Ch. I have allured thee into the wilderness that I might speak comfortably unto thee Hos 2.14 Christian I have been many years in trouble and terrours and wanting peace in my soule which could not possibly have been if I had truly believed in thee Ch. But now will I speak peace unto thee and I will guide thee into the way of peace Psal 85.8 Luk. 1.79 Christian Lord wilt thou speak peace unto me and guide me into the way of peace i. e. The Preachers Lips that Preach't peace Ch. I will create the fruit of the lips Peace Peace and my spirit shall be in thee and his fruit shall be peace to thy soul Esa 57 19. and 55.12 Christian But Lord thy word saith there is no peace to the wicked Ch. No not to a man that will persist in his wicked way and doth not nor will not believe in me but thou art one of those that I bore the chastizement of thy peace and one of the children of peace Esa 53.5 and 54.13 Christian But Lord how can I have peace seeing a man cannot have peace before and without he does believe Ch. Thou shalt have faith and peace and I will give peace through believing 2 Thes 3.16.6 Christian But Lord theâ—â— I must know that I am one of thine Ch. Thou shalt know that I am the Lord thy God and that thou art one of my people Ezek. 34.30 Christian Oh how shall I know that Ch. My spirit shall bear witness with thy spirit that thou art my Child Rom. 8.16 Christian But how shall I know that it is thy spirit that beareth this witness and that it is not the spirit of delusion Ch. Thou maiest know that by its power in working in thy heart which no other spirit can work alike as also by the earnest and fruits thereof 2 Cor. 5.5 and 7.22 Gal. 5.22 23. Christian Lord what else shall I believe besides being one of thine Ch. Dost thou believe that Christian Yes Lord I do believe that thou art Jesus the Son of God and the Saviour of the world Act. 8.37 Joh. 6.69 and 11.27 Ch. But dost thou believe that I am thy Saviour Christian Lord I do believe that there is no other way to be saved but only by thee Act. 4.12 Ch. But dost thou believe that thou shalt be saved by me Christian Lord I do believe help my unbelief Mar. 9.24 Ch. To thee it is given to believe Phil. 1.29 Christian now Lord I doe believe Ch. What dost thou now believe Christian I believe that thou loved'st me and did'st give thy self for me and that thou art my Lord and my God and that I am justified and shall be saved by grace Gal. 2.20 Joh. 20.28 Act. 15.11 Ch. How
soul should redeem some special time for secret and private duties 85. It is the will of Christ that Christians should rejoyce more in what Christ hath done for them then in what they have done or can do for him 86. Christ kept the Law legally Christians kept it evangellically He kept it perfectly they kept it with full purpose and endeavour 87. Ask thy soul O Christian whether he be willing to receive Christ upon his own Terms and for his own sake and to accept of pardon and life through him freely without looking at all upon thy own righteousness Art thou contented that Christ should be honoured in and by thee and that thou shouldst be despised and dishonoured for his sake 88. God doth never out-speak or out-promise his Power Truth and Faithfulness 89. He is a strong Christian that seeks Gods Glory more then his own salvation but he is no Christian that seeks neither 90. It is a great ease to and an unburtherning of the to confess sin sensibly humbly brokenly and with hatred to it 91. Christ and sin are most magnified in the eyes of believers in their affliction but in a very different manner and to a different end For Christ appears as the greatest good and sin as the greatest evil and then Christ will be most desired and sin most despised 92. It is the duty of a Christian to suspect and search himself when he doth not know evil by himself 93. Account the least spiritual thing better then the greatest and best of outward and temporal things 94. Keeking from sin is Soul-preservative Physick but repentance for sin is Soul-Restorative Physick 95. Strive greatly to have and excercise a good conscience toward God and men to commit thy Soul Life and condition to the Lord and then expect the worst of men and the steb of Christ 96. Thou must die once whether thou suffer or no and thou canst but die once if thou suffer 97. The sins of Christians are new sufferings to Christ and the sufferings of Christians are wounds of Christ Eph. 1.30 Ezek. 6.9 98. Labour to act those Graces chiefly that are most contrary to your Master-sins 99. A Christian may know the weight of sin by the sufferings of Christ for if that strong Bar of Steel did bend under the weight of our sins what shall poor weak man do who is but a reed or rush 100. Sathan accuses God to men and men to God but Christ excuses and answers all his accusations against his people 101. He that will not take example from others shall make an example himself 102. O Lord as a sign that I shall be able to die for thee let me find my corruptions dying in me by power from thee 103. He that loves not Christ more then his life is like to lose Christ and his life but he that loves Christ more than his life will be sure to save and keep both Mark 10.49 Luke 14.26 104. Christians should account restraints from sin great mercys to them but Recoveries out of sin with spiritual advantage greater 105. Sin hath no Mother but a mans heart nor Father but Satan 106. Satan draws the Soul into it either by Power or Policy by Force or by Fraud 107. A Christian should desire to have his heart tyed to the Lord and to be strong in faith upon Christ in Love to Christ and in Resolution for him 108. The reason why men do not more magnifie Gods grace is because they do not behold their own vileness and the reason why men do not see their own vileness more is because they do not apprehend Gods goodness more clearly and fully 109. When a Christian comes to be as weary of his sins as of his afflictions God will certainly put an end to them 110. There will be a reviving of old sins if there be not effectual repentance for them and a care by faith through all duties and ordinances to get new strength against them and a constant watch kept over them 111. A Christian comes not to know the weakness of his grace till the spirit ceases to work in and by it nor the power of his corruption till Satan works therein by his Temptations 112. It should trouble a Christian much to have such Graces as he receives from God beget so little good in him 113. The Lord would soon turn from his wrath if men were turned from their wickedness 114. He commands most and best that commands in love humility and self-denyal 115. The world is a great nothing deluding the bad and disturbing and distracting the good 116. The Holy Law of God teaches a man to see his own deformity and requires from a man Conformity to it self 117. Sathan works more upon men by slight then by might avoid therefore his cunning and thou wilt avoid his cruelty 118. He hath not learned to rule well that hath not learned to obey well 119. An even through-paced self-fearing heart-melting Christian is always best 120. Rusling opinion-souring and Church-renting persons and professors have commonly more self then grace if any at all 121. The less a man strives for himself the more will Christ strive for him 122. Thoughts of our own death will much tend to deaden sin 123. Prayer is a good preparative to suffering when Christ had prayed he went out to meet Judas Joh. 18.4 124. Be never at peace with sin Satan or Christs implacable Enemies 125. In two cases 't is hard to act Faith 1. When there is nothing sensible or visible to second and support it 2. When there is very much of these outward things to fill and take the senses withal 126. As Christ was saved from death though he died Heb. 5.7 So are true Christians when they overcome death by their resurrection through Christ 127. Learn by lighter crosses to look and prepare for heavier 128. As our good works and â—â—rformances should have an operation upon our souls and hearts to strengthen faith so should our weaknesses and sins to work Repentance 129. No power can keep him in Bond whom truth and innocency acquits 130. If thou hast faln into sin through violent temptations seek speedily for Repentance for it recovery out of it and Reformation under it If God hath kept thee from falling still fear watch pray and live by faith in Christ 131. Prepare your self for death and pull out its sting 1. By bewailing sins past 2. Turning to God in time to come 3. Purposing a new life none can dy ill that hath had a care of living well perswade your self if you live well you shall die well and if you die well doubt not but you shall have Eternal Happiness 132. Wish not for a long life so much as for a good life he hath lived long who hath lived well a short life in grace endeth in an everlasting life of Glory 133. Distrust not Gods providence in any matter although you see the means wanting neither when you have them let them be reâ—â—ed
certain godly persons LEt us prav unto God so to furnish us with Faith and Patience that we may rather dye ten times then to deny him once it is very requisite that the Members of Christ comfort one another make prayers together confer one with another so shall you be stronger and Gods spirit shall not be absent from you but be in the midst of you to teach you to comfort you to make you wise in all godliness patient in tribulation and strong in persecution Ye see how the congregation of the wicked by helping one another make their wicked Religion and themselves strong against God his truth and his people If any smart Gods people shall be the first if any suffer shame they begin if any be subject to slander it is those that he loveth so that Christ sheweth no face nor favour nor love almost in this world outwardly to them but doth as it were lay clay upon the sore eyes of those that are sorrowful yet the patient man seeth as St. Paul saith life hid under these miseries and adversities and light and sight hid under this foul clay The will of our Father be done in all things if he will life life be it if he will death death be it It is a trouble to loose the treasures of this life but yet a very great pain if they be kept with offence to God cry call pray and in Christ daily require help succour mercy wisdome grace and defence that the wickedness of this world prevail not against us We began well God preserve us to the end This life is short and miserable happy are they that can spend it to the glory of God We may be tempted of the world the flesh and the Devil but yet although these things pinch yet they do not pierce and although they work sin in us yet in Christ no condemnation to them that are grafted in him Mr. Richard Rooth In a Letter to certain Martyrs condemned at Colchester OH dear hearts in Christ what a Crown of glory shall ye receive with Christ in the Kingdome of God Oh that it had been the good will of God that I had been ready to have gone with you for I lie in the Bishops little ease in the day and in the night I lie in the coal-house and we look every day when we shall be condemned for they say I shall be burned within ten days before Easter but I lie still at the pools brink and every one stepeth in before me but we abide patiently the Lords leisure in many bonds in fetters and stocks by which we have received great joy in the Lord. Oh my dear hearts now shall you be cloathed with long white garments upon mount Sion with the multitude of Saints and with Jesus Christ our Saviour who will never forsake us Oh blessed Virgins you have played the wise Virgins part because you have taken oyl into your lamps that you may enter with the Bridegroom when he cometh into everlasting joy But as for the foolish they shall be shut out because they made not themselves ready to suffer with Christ nor venture to take up his Cross O how precious shall your death be in the sight of the Lord dear and precious in his sight is he detah of all his Saints Farewell mine own dear Hearts and pray the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you all Amen Pray pray pray By me Richard Rooth written with my own blood Mr. John Philpot In a Letter to Mr. R.H.R.G.M.H. and J.C. GLorious is the course of the Martyrs at this day Never had the Elect of God a better time for their glory then this is Now may they be assured under the Cross that they are Christs Disciples for ever Many go on well till they come to the Pikes and then they turn their backs and give over in the plain field to the shame of Christ and his Church that hath so faint hearted Souldiers in his camp at the time of need in that wherein his glory ought most manfully to be shewed Be content to have your Faith tryed every day by some Cross or other as it pleaseth God to put it upon you and if God put no grievous Cross upon you let your brethrens Cross be your Cross which is a certain token of true brotherly love Hitherto we have not resisted unto blood-shedding our blood must not be too dear for the Lord and then his Kingdome shall not be too dear for us We have taken our Press-mony a great while let us now learn to serve him faithfully and not to fly out of the Lords camp into the world as many do Mr. John Careless To several Martyrs condemned to die for the truth in New-Gate SO great honour is not permitted to the highest Angel in Heaven as to suffer for the name of Christ Full glad may you be that ever God gave you a life to lose for his sake A weak Faith hath ever a cold charity annexed unto it which is quenched with every unkind word Nothing can anger the malicious mind and cankered heart of Satan more then the mirth gladness and hearty rejoycing of Gods Children in their good Christ Only Christs true Disciples do mourn for his absence therefore they shall doubtless rejoyce in his presence which will be so much the more joyful by how much the more his absence is sorrowful According to your Faith and as you believe so shall it be unto you and as you think God to be unto you such a one you shall find him to be think therefore ever sweetly of the Lord and of his goodness Mr. John Careless In a Letter to Mr. John Bradford NOw with a merry heart and joyful tears I take my farewel of you mine own dear brother in the Lord begging him to send us shortly a joyful meeting in his kingdome that we may both sing praises together unto him with his holy Angels and blessed spirits for ever and ever Farewel thou blessed of the Lord farewel in Christ depart unto thy rest and pray for me for Gods sake Well I will hope in God and pray all night that God would send me some comfort to morrow and if the Lord give you leasure to morrow let me hear four words of comfort from you for Gods sake Oh that my life and a thousand such wretched lives more might go for yours Oh why doth God suffer me and such other poor worms to live that can do nothing but consume the Alms of the Church and yet take you away so worthy a work-man and Labourer in the Lords vineyard But wo be to our sins and great unthankfulness which is the cause of taking away of such instruments of the Lord as should set forth his glory and instruct his people if we had been thankful to God for the good Ministers of his word we had not been so soon deprived of them The Lord forgive our great ingratitude and his and give us true repentance and
faith and stretch forth his hand of mercy over us for his dear Son Christ his sake take not away all thy true Preachers out of this Realm O Lord but leave us a seed least England be made as Sodom and Gomorrah when thy true Lots are removed and gone But why go I about to mingle your mirth with my mourning your just joy with my deserved sorrow if I loved you as I pretended I should surely rejoice with you most hartily and praise God from the very bottom of my heart I should praise God night and day for your excellent Election in and through his great mercy I should give him most humble thanks for your vocation by his Gospel and your true knowledg in the same I should earnestly praise him for your sweet justification whereof you are most certain by Gods grace and spirit I should earnestly pray to him for your Glorification which shall shortly ensue I should rejoice and be glad to see you dignified by the Crown of Martyrdome and to be appointed to that honour to testifie his truth and to seal it with your blood I should highly extol the Lord who hath given you a glorious victory over all your Enemies visible and invisible and hath given you grace and strength to finish your Course as you have begun Oh that the time were now come that I might put off this frail Tabernacle of the flesh in this heavenly security quietness of conscience in Jesus Christ Yours for ever in the Lord Jesus John Careless living in hope against hope Mr. John Careless to Mr. Philpot. MY dearly beloved brother God hath brought you into a straight place out of your pinching and painful seat in prison you have plentifully poured upon me your precious Oyntment the sweet Savour whereof hath greatly refreshed my faint and tired soul Ah good Jeremiah hath Pashur put thee in the Stocks why now thou hast the reward of a Prophet thy glory never began to appear until now Oh good Mr. Philpot which art a principle Pot indeed filled with most precious liquor as appeareth by thy plenteous pouring out of the same O Pot most happy ordained to honour by the high Potter thou dost contain heavenly treasure in thy earthen vessel Oh Pot thrice happy in whom Christ hath wrought a great miracle altering thy nature and turning water into Wine and that of the best out of whom the Master of the Feast hath filled my cup so full that I am even overcome in joy of the spirit through the same Be not offended dear heart at my Metaphorical speech for I am disposed to be merry and with David to dance before the Ark of the Lord and though you play on a painful pair of Organs the Stocks not very comly nor easie to the flesh yet the sweet sound that came from thence to me from you causeth me thus to speak Oh that I were with you in the body as I am present in spirit that I might sing all care away in Christ Jesus our blessed Saviour and Redeemer from all trouble for now the time of comfort is come Mr. Laurence Sanders In a Letter to the true Professors of the Gospel MY dear friends in the Lord the times are perilous and dangerous we must therefore be circumspect and not solace delight our selves in carnal security but with a joyful and contented mind we must now venture into the ship of Christs Cross and afflictions and now let us seriously weigh and consider all the perils dangers and hazards that we must expect to meet in our journey to our heavenly Countrey yet let us account it comfort enough in this dangerous Voyage that we have the company and fellowship of such an adventurer as our blessed Lord Jesus to go along with us when he was once in the ship with his Disciples with his word he did asswage the swelling of the dangerous Seas and he hath not left us alone in this ship either to sink or to swim but will be awaked if he be call'd upon by importunate prayer Holy Breathings OR A Divine Dialogue between Jesus and the Soul With other Poems Mat. 11.28 Come unto me all ye that labour and are heavy laden and I will give you rest Soul COme unto me what voice is this I here Iesus It is the sweet voice of thy Saviour dear He calleth labouring sinners to him flee He calleth laden sinners such as thee He calleth sinners bids them come away He calleth all Oh why then shouldst thou stay He calleth such as by sin are undone He calleth thee therefore unto him run Soul But how I should come to thee Blessed Lord Sin is the only thing by thee abhord And I am nothing else but sin and thou Wilt not of sin of the least sin allow Besides thou art in heaven and how shall I Reach unto thee thou art above the sky And I poor creature grovling on the earth The mold from which at first I came by birth Iesus Remember soul my blessed word that saith That coming to me is alone by Faith Soul Thou Lord that puttest faith into mans heart Bestow on me that gift to me impart Such other graces as may let me see My want of Christ that I may come to thee My sins thou know'st a heavy burden are A load that is too big for me to bear No slave that 's under Turkish Tyranny Is under such sad bondage as am I. But it is unto thee O Christ I come Believing in thee Oh make me a Room Within thy Arms take me into thy heart And since my Faith is weak strong Faith impart Iesus Poor Soul take comfort though thy Faith be small A grain of mustard seed's smallest of all Yet I of mustard seeds of Faith allow So that thy Soul unto my Scepter bow Nay of one grain a wonder let it be To thy poor soul that such love is in me That I accept of Faith even of the least That I receive so poor so vile a guest As wretched man who nothing hath to bring To make him acceptable but his sin Soul O blessed Jesus mount me on the wing Of Holy Faith let me not feel the sting Of conscience but let me answer all That I believed and went at Christ his call My Saviour call'd and I unto him went He gave me Faith and helpt me to repent I come with sorrow that I sinned have I come with Faith that thou my soul wilt save It is but weak O Lord I must confess It is a feeble hand yet ne're the less It is the hand of Faith and it is true It lays holds on thee claiming but its due And that is Rest which thou hast promised me And my poor soul is restless till with thee Rest is that good all creatures do desire Rest is that good to which all Saints aspire If th' bodies resting after labour be So sweet so pleasant as we know and see Then what is it to have the soul to rest In