of thy righteousness The mortified Christian tolling his own knell LOrd since death is my passage into thy presence why sufferest thou the thought thereof to be terrible unto me This consideration affrights me more then death it self O Lord I cannot without some reluctance think that suddenly I shall see man no more upon the face of the earth Doubtless the light is pleasant to the eyes and a joyful thing it is to behold the Sun The Grave cannot praise thee Death cannot celebrate thee they that go down into the pit cannot hope for thy truth The living the living he shall praise thee as I desire to do this day Consider ô Lord I desire to walk before thee in truth and with a perfect heart O my God take me not away in the midst of my dayes Thy years are throughout all Generations Hast thou so little work for me to do that thou allottest me so short a time and bringest upon me sorrows and weaknesses so fast Lord I came into the world on thy errand and I live onely upon thy allowance I am not to be my own carver My God my goodness extendeth not unto thee thou needest neither my service nor my being certainly 't is but nature in me that thus affects to serve thee in life when thou callest on me to glorifie thee by death Let it abundantly content me O Lord that whether waking or sleeping dead or alive I shall be always thine and always live together with Christ Lord help me to consider what a poor derivative thing I am what a meer dependant upon thee And let the consideration of thy Majesty and glory swallow up all those petty interests of my own which I create in my self to my self Help me in every passage and particular of my life and death to say as is right meet my bounden duty the will of my Lord be done O Lord let me not dare to be displeased at any thing whatsoever it be that is thy pleasure Suffer me not though with the softest voyce of my Soul to interrogate upon thy proceedings or to whisper to my self what 's the reason the Lord will thus deal with me Though thou shouldst cut off like a Weaver my life and deprive me of the residue of my years Though thou shouldst like a Lyon break all my bones and from day even till night with pining sickness and faintness make an end of me Yet let me be dumb and not open my mouth because it is thy doing Nay O Lord open my mouth wide to say Behold the unprofitable servant of the Lord be it unto me as thou pleasest Into thy hand Lord I resign my Body and Soul Lord Jesus receive my spirit Come Lord Jesus come quickly Amen The Jubilee THy Vows are upon me O God I will sing and give thanks Open thou my lips that my mouth may shew forth thy praise That I may extoll thee with the best member I have and that my tongue may sing aloud of thy righteousness and of thy goodness Why is it Lord that I am thus straightned towards thee who art so enlarged unto me Why is it that my thanksgivings are usually confin'd to the very enquiry onely what I shall render unto thee for all thy benefits towards me But O Lord what can I render unto thee since all I have is thine First O Lord I prayse thee that thou hast put it into the heart of thy servant thus to ascribe all I have unto thee and thus to give unto thee of thine own From thy goodness O Lord I have received my being and every thing which maketh it not a burthen and a misery unto me Thou openest the hand of thy liberality and suppliest all my necessities Lord I praise thee for the many temporal blessings thou hast here afforded me and yet that thou hast not given me my portion in this life or my good things in it I prayse thee for those unutterable and endless joys which thou of thy grace hast prepared for me and of which thou hast already wrought in me some participation by hope through Christ the fountain of all my good Praysed be thy name for that discipline and method of grace which thou art pleased to take to fit me for that thy Kingdom I prayse thee O Lord for bringing me into the wilderness to humble me to prove me to know what was in my heart and then to speak comfortable words to me That thou art pleased as a man chastneth his son so to chasten me to cross my will and frustrate my designs and all to do me good in the latter end I prayse thee for correcting me in measure for considering how frail a creature I am and not suffering my spirit quite to fail under thy hand Oh what great troubles and adversities hast thou shewed me and yet didst thou turn and refresh me and broughtest me from the deep of Hell again O Lord thou knewest my Soulin all her adversities When I said I was cast out of thy presence yet then wert thou neer unto me and receivedst my prayer In the multitude of terrible and distracting thoughts within me thy comfort O Lord through thy sons blood refresh'd my Soul I prayse thee O Lord for the long striving of thy Spirit with me whereas thou mightest without me offer of grace have left me unto that Death which I have more than once chosen Lord thou continually bearest with my evil manners Thou sparest when I deserve punishment and according to thy unspeakable goodness rewardest me good for evil O Lord I daily undo my self and loose the works thou hast wrought I daily pierce my Soul through with poysoned darts yet thou art my continual help and my constant health How many times do both my flesh and my heart fail me Yet Lord thou art alwayes the strength of my heart and my portion for ever They that follow after lying vanities for sake their own mercies But it is good for me to draw nigh unto my God I have put my trust in thy name oh thou most High The Authors concluding Vote for himself and the Reader O Lord let the dross and the hay and the stubble in this book be burn't with fire but the Author sav'd at thy great day through thy Sons blood Suffer no Reader to turn that to an occasion of uncharitableness toward me which I design'd for his good Suffer no Reader to think I sought my self in that I have told him somewhat that thou hast done for my Soul Grant also that none may think of me beyond what with judicious and charitable eyes and ears he heareth of me or seeth in me And Lord thou knowest I have not the least cause to be proud of that FINIS Pray 2. Pray 3. Pray 4. Pray 5. Pray 6. Pray 7. Pray 8.
piercing even to the dâ—â—â—ding asunder of soul and spirit Let others seek for grounds to believe the Scriptures thy inspiration This satisfyeth me that none could so lay open the inmost secrets of the heart but thou alone who onely knowest it O Lord I many times think that in reading other books I have discovered mysteries and yet upon review of thine I see the same things there and oh how much clearer Oftentimes O Lord I meet with things both within me and without which when I seek to know they are too painful for me until I flie unto this thy sanctuaâ—â— and then I understand them O Lord I have seen an end of all perfection but thy Commandments are exceeding broad To thy Law and to thy Testimonies let all men have recourse They that speak not according to this word have no light in them Behold all they that kindle fires and compass themselves about with their own sparks Though they walk never so presumptuously and pleasantly in the fire and the sparks they have kindled yet this shall they have at thy hand they shall lie down in sorrow As for me O Lord I am a stranger upon Earth oh hide not thy Commandment from me Suffer me not to choose unto my self any of those blind guides my vain minde or subtile adversary would accommodate me with Lord whither should I go from thee Thou hast the words of eternal life Let thy word be a Lamp to my feet and a light unto my path Let thy Statutes be my Song in the house of my Pilgrimage Grant that here beholding thy glory in this glass when I awake up I may be satisfied with thine Image The hopeful Souls conflict between extremities SVffer thy Servant O Lord who is but dust and ashes thus to expostulate with thee in the bitterness of his Soul Lord what a riddle and a wonder am I to my self How many characters read I in my heart which I understand not and how many see I there which I cannot read How oft am I in a great straight my Soul being dejected and my Spirit confounded within me how oft am I at a loss and know not what to think of my self One while I finde my Soul somewhat confident in thee and am ready to say I shall never greatly be moved Thou Lord of thy goodness seemest to have made my â—ill so strong Anon thou but hidest thy face and oh how am I troubled One while my fingers seem to drop Myrrhe in following after thee and ere I am aware my Soul carryeth me like the Chariots of Ammi-nadab Anon all my Wheels are taken off and I finde nor foot or heart to draw or move toward thee One while I can with joy and cheerfulness look into the Holy of Holies through the vail of thy Sons flesh Anon with the Publican I dare not so much as lift up my eyes unto heaven and say I am deservedly cast out of thy sight One while I think the high holds of my heart levell'd to the foot of Christ and the way of the Lord prepar'd in my Soul A while after I seem to descry Mountains yet unremov'd Now I perswade my self thou hast in good measure cast my heart into the mold of Christianity Anon I cry out oh in how little am I a Christian I one while laugh at my weaknesses follies and mistakes to consider how oddly and strangely I cheat and deceive my self soon after I am astonish'd and confounded at fouler discoveries and then again in hopes of thy pardoning and subduing my corruptions I say return unto thy rest ô my Soul and yet I keep not long there Every day new wonders appear within me and I know I am far still from seeing to the bottom of my heart Lord all things are naked and bare before thee thou understandest my thoughts afar off thou knowest my foolishness and none of my sins are hid from thee Lord though I know not what I am yet I know thou canst make me what thou wilt Search me O God try my heart and my reins suffer not any way of wickedness to remain with me but guide me in the way everlasting Work truth in my inward parts and in my hidden part make me to understand Wisdom O let my heart be sound in thy Statutes that I be not ashamed The humble Soul's Agony with natural Pride O Lord God of Hoasts the terrible and Omnipotent thou settest thy self in battel-array against the proud How shall I approach thy presence with a proud heart when the Mediator between thee and man admits none to him but the humble and lowly Yet oh meek Jesu amongst them certainly thou invitest those that are sensible of that are heavie laden with their pride and desire to be humble Holy Father thy poor creature hath all the causes in the world to be humble whether I respect thee above or hell beneath or the weaknesses of body and mind in my self or without me the eminent gifts thou hast bestowed upon others of the least of which I am not as uncaple as unworthy Yet O Lord none of these considerations will prevail on my corrupt perverse treacherous heart without thy blessing without thou set them home upon me Thou canst level the Mountains and bring down the high and lofty and make the rough smooth and the crooked straight Thy smallest breath can rend the Cedars My sad experience with my natural fears make me almost despair of prevailing against this corruption of ever performing the least part of my duty without this taint attending it My God my whole trust is in thee with thee I know all things are both possible and easie I cast my spirit into thy hands undertake for me Be surety for thy servant in that which is good that the proud do me no harm Suffer me not to think the pride of my heart then mortified when charm'd onely by some passionate reflection or warm application Suffer me not to think it extinct when with drawn onely or hid in some corner of my brest Suffer me not to make terms with this enemy or conceit I am humbled and be proud in that Rather oh Lord let the Messenger of Satan buffet me so that thy grace be sufficient for me Rather let him foyl me so that I rise by my fals and through thy grace prevail by being overcome Yet oh Lord how long shall I cry out by reason of the oppression of the enemy I beseech thee for thy Anointed's sake and thou wilt not turn away his face let me not go all the day long this heavily whilst the enemy magnifies himself and triumphs over me Arise O Lord command deliverances for me Attend unto my cry for I am brought very low deliver me from my persesecutor for he is too strong for me Bring my Soul out of prison that I my praise thy name Ô compass me about with Songs of deliverance Open my mouth wide with thanksgiving and let my tongue sing aloud
Drops of Myrrhe OR MEDITATIONS AND PRAYERS Fitted to divers of the preceding Arguments O Lord my strength be not silent unto me lest if thou make as though thou hearest me not I become like them that go down into the pit Psal. 28. 1. My Beloved is gone down into his garden to the beds of Spices to feed in the garden and to gather the Lillies I am my beloveds and my beloved is mine he feedeth among the Lillies Cantic. 6. 2 3. LONDON Printed by R. W. for Rich. Davis in Oxon. 1653. The Arguments 1. A Prayer for a distracted Church and State 2. A Prayer for the Spirit of moderation and discerning 3. A Meditation and Prayer concerning the perfection of Gods Word 4. The hopeful Soul's conflict between extremities 5. The humble Soul's Agony with natural pride 6. The mortified Christian tolling his own knell 7. The deliver'd Soul's Iubilee 8. The Authors concluding vote for himself and the Reader An Advertisement to the READER BEcause there are abundance of excellent forms of Meditations and prayers for all occasions already in Print and the generality of men now with Saul's Army choose rather to fast and faint then save such honey from dropping on the ground which probably if tasted might illuminate the eyes I shall not add much of this nature as namely particular Forms of confession humiliation of supplications intercession thansgivings but only some few Portions excerpt or enlarged from my own private Devotions which I thought most pertinent to some of the matters foregoing God sanctifie them to the humble Readers use For a distracted CHURCH and STATE Prayer I. OH Lord God the great and terrible that rulest heaven and earth that puttest down one and settest up another and none may say unto thee what dost thou Look down from the hibitation of thy holiness and thy glory and behold with an eye of pity this wretched Nation O Lord things are now at that pass that we know not which way to look Our eyes are up unto thee merciful God save or we perish Let not the oppressions and calamities that have already befaln us seem small in the eyes of thy compassion though we confess thou hast punished us much less then our iniquities deserve But for thy mercy sake which is over all thy works for thy sons sake who taketh away the sins of world let it be enough Let there be no more such terrible shakings and earthquakes among us Let the prayers of thy small remnant more prevail with thee for pardon and mercies then the abominations of wicked men and hypocrites for judgement and vengeance Sanctifie thy bitter providences to such as it hath pleased thee to afflict and debase Give them submiss patience under thy all-ruling-hand and a joyful harvest from their sorrows even if it be thy will in this life if otherwise in the next and however thou disposest O thou most Just and most Wise of particular persons and interests yet let the interess of thy Gospel be Advanced the hearts of thy people established and comforted and the patient expectation of the humbled and injured satisfied Arise Oh Lord let not man prevail Thou who â—â—â—est between the Cherubims shew thy self Shew thy self a Defender if the innocent One that humbleth those that exalt themselves that taketh the crafty in his devices and maketh the hypocrite a terror to himself Lord God of Hoasts Let not them have occasion to say with their mouth or in their heart that thou God hearest not or seest not or that thou God hast forsaken the Earth Let a Book of Remembrance be written for those that fear thee and yet speak often for thy truth and put up into thy bottle every tear shed by those whom it pitieth to see our Zion thus in the dust Return Oh Lord how long stoppest thou thy ears and wilt not hear thy people pray Be pleased for thy Sons sake yet at length to make this Land a praise in the Earth an holy Church and a Religious prosperous State Take away from amidst us the spirit of delusion and strife and hatred and hypocrisie and pour out a Spirit of love of equity and of truth Remove every stumbling-block and rock of offence every galling thorn and pricking briar to the spirits of such as desire to fear thy name and make the way of the Lord so plain in the Land that the waifaring man though a fool may not err therein And cause all of us however at present unhappily devided yet at length with unanimous hearts to say Not any of our wills but the will of our Lord be done Amen For the Spirit of moderation and discerning OH Lord the Father of Lights and fountain of Wisdom Into how many parties and interests are those that profess thy name devided How many lay claim to thy truth that in the same particulars contradict each other And how many colours are found out to make each pretence seem probable How difficult is it to determine which is right how uncomfortable to hover between uncertainties how dangerous to resolve at a rash adventure Oh Lord thy unworthy Servant hath a long time sadly considered these premises and amidst those floods of doubts and controversies which now cover the face of thy Church can scarce with Noah's Dove finde one dry place whereon to rest his foot Oh my God I betake my self to the Ark my refuge My eys are up unto thee Thou hast bid those who want wisdom to ask of thee who givest liberally and upbraidest no man Vouchsafe me I beseech thee for thy Sons sake a share in that thy promise That thy Spirit shall lead me into all truth Give me a discerning spirit that I may discern between things that differ and a stable minde with a settled judgment that I may not be toss'd about with every wind of doctrine but let my senses be so exercis'd that I may prove all things and firmly hold whatsoever is good And because knowledge puffeth up but love edifieth joyn humility and charity with my knowledge and effectually bow my heart to do thy will and then thy promise is That I shall know it Furthermore O Lord because of all thy attributes thou commendest none more to our imitation then those of love mildness grant O Lord that I may not deceive my self and think it a piece of Religion to be bitter against my Brethren but make me to study and practise that wisdom which is first pure then peaceable gentle and easie to be entreated full of mercy and good fruits without partiality and hypocrisie O Lord grant me my request for thy Sons sake Amen Meditation and Prayer concerning the Word of God HOw perfect is thy Law O God which converteth souls Thy Testimonies O Lord which make the wise simple how sure are they Thy Statutes are pure and râ—joyce the heart Thy Commandment is pure and enlightens the eyes Thy Word is quick and powerful sharper then any two-edged sword