bee without this heate he that hath that Sun cannot be without this light When my great and enormous sinnes had plunged me into the sea of misery finding no other meane of helpe in that fearefull danger I catched vp and tooke hold of the planke or boordof Repentance to saue me from drowning Repentance hath two faces and so looketh two wayes backward and forward to sinnes past and holinesse to come I haue grieuously lamented my offences formerly done and importunately begged pardon for them accounting this remission because thou art pleased O God so to esteeme it my iustification I now earnestly craue a cleane heart and a new spirit that being clensed I may keep my selfe cleane that being renewed I may entertaine newnesse of life for my sanctification For if I fall againe vpon the same rock of presumption which caused my shipwracke before it will plainely appeare that I haue not really acted but formally counterfeited repentance in which case I must pronounce an heauie doome against my selfe for dissembled holinesse is double wickednesse wickednesse masking vnder the sinfull vayle and vizard of hypocrisie Repentance neuer attaines her Crowne and Garland till shee haue brought forth amendment of life after lamentation for sin to make some kind of reparation That which thou requirest of me O God is my heart and how can I deny thee one thing that hast giuen me all things for what haue I that I haue not receiued of thee Well then I resolue as it is meet to giue thee my heart But when I looke into my heart by the helpe of thy suruey for it is thou that declarest vnto man what and how ill his heart is I finde it so foule and full of corruption as I am ashamed to present it vnto thee in that plight Nay I tremble to thinke that thy Pure and Radiant Eyes should behold such a puddle and sincke of sinne as lurketh in my heart For alas euery imagination of the thoughts of my heart is onely euill continually Were my heart such as it should be I would cheerefully giue thee my heart O Lord therefore create in mee a cleane heart Thou madest my heart first in Adam hee marred it and I in him by disobedience from him to all his posterity the contagion of this pollution is spred and propagated wherefore create my heart againe create it a cleane heart either a cleane heart or no heart at all I affect purity of heart by thy grace for indeed I cannot so much as affect much lesse effect it without thee Vnlesse thou take the worke in hand it will be vndone My heart that is originally and totally vncleane by naturall generation and daily soiled by actuall transgression cannot become cleane and neate without spirituall washing and supernaturall regeneration and that is thy proper operation Seeke not to new make mould my defiled hart out of the forebeing matter thereof That may seeme a strange enterprize and fruitlesse worke But thou O God who by thy power madest the world of nothing by thy powerfull grace Create which is thy peculiar attribute a cleane heart within me To create is not to make a thing out of the power of any subiect or matter formerly being But to create is to make a thing of nothing and that is an act of diuine power that is a case excepted and a prerogatiue reserued to thee alone The production of grace in a gracelesse heart is a wonderfull and gracious creation Create in mee powerfully and of nothing without any 〈◊〉 matter create in me 〈◊〉 and for nothing without any precedent merit of mine a pure heart so 〈◊〉 thou crowne in mee not my deserts but thine 〈◊〉 gifts if ought proceed from my heart to my tongue or hand not displeasing vnto thee Worke this worke thy selfe and take the praise of it to thy selfe alone O God Not vnto mee not vnto me I doe iterate and ingeminate my disclaymer but vnto thy Name giue all the glory It is another manner of power to make the quality then the substance of the heart yea it is a harder taske to make a heart cleane that hath beene soiled with the filth and tainted with the putrifaction of sin then to make a pure and innocent heart at the first The more shall be my thankfulnesse if thou O Lord vouchsafe me so great a fauour I will not curiously enquire into the meanes or manner of atchieuing this worke Let me henceforth really finde by the imaginations and inclinations of it that it is a cleane heart conformed as it may be in the frailty of 〈◊〉 flesh 〈◊〉 thy holy 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 all is well As a woman 〈◊〉 by the stirring of the 〈◊〉 in her wombe that 〈◊〉 hath conceiued so 〈◊〉 me feele by the effectuall motions of thy good 〈◊〉 that I am begotten anew vnto a liuely 〈◊〉 by the resurrection of Christ according to his abundant mercy The summe of all is Giue me O Lord what thou enioynest and then enioyne mee what thou pleasest I am of no ability to do what thou commandest and therefore am enforced to beseech thee thy selfe to do in me what thou requirest to bee done of me Create a cleane heart in me If my heart as the spring and conduit head be pure and cleane the waters that flow thence though conueighed in earthen pipes will be cleare still my secret thoughts my open words my visible workes though they sauour somewhat of earth and flesh will not be altogether vncleane and vnsauoury A man must bee twice borne ere he can enter into the kingdome of heauen As he is made to the similitude of the first Adam so must he be made to the similitude of the second Adam and the regeneration is a more excellent worke then the generation the re-creation then the creation In the first man was wrought out of clay in the other God workes grace out of sinne In the former he breathed a soule into the dead body here he breatheth his holy Spirit into a dead heart In the creation he made man perfect in all his members In this re-creation not only all the members of the body but the faculties of the soule also must be framed anew It is a greater matter to raise a man dead in sinne then to raise a rotten carkasse out of the graue In the one birth and the other the heart is the first 〈◊〉 that is enlyued my 〈◊〉 must first take fire 〈◊〉 can I neuer bee 〈◊〉 with the true zeale of 〈◊〉 glory and mine owne saluation In the first creation this 〈◊〉 Chaos and darke 〈◊〉 was couered by thy 〈◊〉 without any contradiction or resistance Thou spakest but the word and all was readily done and perfectly framed But in my re-creation my flesh or my spirit or my fleshly spirit doth oppose and incounter thy holy Spirit grieueth and maketh it sad laboureth to quench it euen then when it striueth to reuiue repaire and reforme me This is notoriously verified
grieuous and irkesome will the damage and disgrace be to euery or any of these respectiuely Thou O God art our Master and to serue thee is to raigne with thee Thou art our Father and what greater preeminence then to bee the Sonne of God Thou art our King and to be in subiection to thee is our chiefest dominion How then doth it concerne me being an vnfaithfull Seruant a prodigall Childe and a trayterous Subiect to beg earnestly of thee my bountifull Master my louing Father my gracious Soueraigne that thou wilt not take away thy 〈◊〉 banish me from thy fight nor expell mee from thy Courts As the soule doth excell the body and the 〈◊〉 the flesh beyond proportion so the one losse is incomparably greater then the other Thou O God art present with me by thy good Spirit and so long as I haue this Ghest in my soule I haue the fruition of thee and thy presence wherefore suffer not this noble Ghest to be dislodged and taken from mee Thou and thy Spirit are vndeuided companions If thou cast me from thy presence thou takest thy holy Spirit from me and if thou takest 〈◊〉 Spirit thou takest thy selfe from me I doe yet enioy thy presence in a sort I behold thy countenance though full of anger I feele thy Spirit within mee though sad and grieued for I find contrition in my heart confession in my mouth and confusion in my face for my grieuous offences I hate my sinnes and my selfe for my sinnes This smoake cannot ascend but from that fire of thy Spirit this fruit cannot grow but from that roote of repentance Howbeit when I behold the vglinesse of my offences with an vnpartiall eye and consider how hard harsh a thing it is for Purity and Holinesse to dwell or abide with wickednesse and filthinesse I tremble and quake in an awefull feare that thou wilt as iustly thou mayest depriue me of thy gracious presence and bereaue mee of thy blessed Spirit Lord thou art in all things by thine Essence thou art in all places and at once by thy Power and presence I may well bee asked Whither wilt thou flye from his Spirit or whither wilt thou goe from his presence c If thou shalt say The darkenesse shall couer me euen the night shall bee light about thee Yet thou canst and wilt cast me from thy presence and withdraw thy holy Spirit from me if I be settled vpon the dregs of my sinnes without remorse in contempt of thy Maiestie and abuse of thy mercie If thou in thy iust iudgement and wrathfull indignation abandon mee from thy presence thou castest me out of thy prouidence and protection thy blessed Spirit doth quite desert mee I am banished out of the land of the liuing into the Desert of desolation which is without the compasse of the whole Vniuerse that thou didst create and d'st vphold In that case happy were I to bee no more but I shall be most vnhappy to bee and continue helpelesse and hopelesse in endlesse misery Thy holy Spirit is by a speciall title stiled The Comforter by excellencie because all other comforters and comforts are cold and vncomfortable without and beside it I haue I confesse with griefe many times checked this Spirit when it hath presented good motions to my minde and good desires to my hart I haue grieued it exceedingly while I carelesly neglected and stubbornely refused the good counsell it ministred vnto me Howbeit sithence without this Comforter I must bee for euer comfortlesse in the depth of discomfort I 〈◊〉 thee not to take vtterly and finally thy holy Spirit from me Thy gifts O Lord are without repentance therefore I trust I shal neuer be without repentance whō thou louest once thou doest euer loue if thou begin thou wilt perseuere to loue Although I doe not alwayes feele the graces of thy Spirit in my sinfull soule yet I shall 〈◊〉 trust haue 〈◊〉 euer because once I had them My sinne may take away the sence and 〈◊〉 for a while but not the interest and property if I may so say which I haue in thy blessed Spirit Which notwithstanding the fruition of this Spirit being so precious and the losse of it so inualuable I cannot but in feare and anxiety of soule instantly pray that it may not be taken from me Although the seed of thy Word whereby I am begotten againe to a liuely Hope be immortall and incorruptible yet it is so choked with the weeds of fleshly desires so intangled with worldly allurements it lyeth so buried in the furrowes of my hard and stony heart as I may much doubt and in a manner distrust the shooting and springing of it vp againe without an extraordinary influence of thy heauenly grace which cannot descend vpon me vnlesse my humble and earnest prayers ascend vp to thee Wherefore retaine mee O Lord in thy fauour and permit thy blessed Spirit not onely to soiourne for a season but to remaine continually with me Let me so keepe a doore in the Sanctuary of my soule which is one of thy Courts as I may neuer suffer this Ghest to goe out of it 12 Restore vnto mee the ioy of thy saluation and vphold mee with thy firme Spirit or stablish mee with thy free Spirit I Doe not say Giue mee what I neuer had but restore vnto mee what I had and haue lost by mine owne fault and folly It is a greater fauour to restore then to giue in as much as it is a greater vnhappinesse to lose a Iewell which I had then neuer to haue had it Priuation is a greater punishment then want It is the height of misery to haue beene happy To come out of darknesse into light out of sicknesse into health out of perplexity into security out of sorrow sadnesse into ioy and gladnesse and so by the contrary to come out of cheerfulnesse into pensiuenesse sets out more liuely and causes to be felt more sensibly both the one and the other condition One contrary is a foyle vnto another We then make the tru est valuation of thy greatest mercies O Lord when we are for a time depriued of them which is one speciall cause why thou takest them from vs that by the want we may learne the worth of them and shew our selues accordingly thankefull because thou diddest vouchsafe vs the fruition of them so long and much more ioyfully imbrace and charily preserue them when thou pleasest to restore them to vs againe For as the eyes cannot discerne a goodly obiect when it is held close vnto them but when it is remoued in some distance so our vntoward vnthankfull hearts cannot iudge of the excellency and sweetnesse of present graces but when they are withdrawne a while from vs then doe we more cheerefully behold and fully obserue the riches of thy bounty mercy in them This ioy of thy saluation consisteth in an assured
quickly slips from good Meditations and Actions slides from honest purposes and proceedings vnlesse it bee sustained by thy Spirit But being quickned and enlyued by thy Spirit though otherwise dead I shal liue in thee by thee for thee all my thoughts words and workes shall breathe continually thy praise and glory Thy Spirit O Lord is the life of my soule as my spirit is the life of my body if my spirit faile my body perisheth if thy Spirit desert my soule my soule cannot but fall irrecouerably Wherefore vphold mee with thy Spirit Thy Spirit is free in it selfe As the winde bloweth so the Spirit breatheth where it listeth As it is a free so it is a freeing Spirit a Spirit of liberty which deliuereth me from the bondage of Sinne a Spirit of Adoption whereby I cry Abba Father As the Spirit is free so are those that are led by the Spirit free ingenuous bold and couragious it infranchizeth and naturalizeth me in the heauenly Hierusalem This Spirit hath power to helpe all my infirmities it hath skill and will to frame my Supplications within me to be expressed if not by tongue voyce yet by sighes and grones vnutterable but still intelligible to thee it can preserue mee from falling it can raise mee after I haue falne and then so establish mee that I shall neuer come againe into danger of relapse or recidiuation My spirit thus vpheld and established by thy free Spirit what is it else but a cheerefull alacrity and forward disposition to imbrace any thing that is good for it owne sake and for thy sake without any by or secondary respect whatsoeuer banisheth all drowzy dulnesse and vntoward listlesnesse in thy seruice that putteth wings to my obedience and maketh it not to walke slowly but to flye nimbly in the accomplishment of thy errands and directions that causeth me to doe ingenuously what becommeth me for loue of vertue and not for feare of the whip basely When thou hadst appointed that the first 〈◊〉 of euery beast should bee set apart to thee thou diddest specially ordaine that if it were the Foale of an Asse it should be redeemed with a Lambe if it were not the necke of it should bee broken thou wouldest not haue it sacrificed vnto thee at any hand Surely it may well seeme that this is alterius rei 〈◊〉 a kinde of riddle and that by this shaddow thou wouldest shew thy 〈◊〉 of slothfulnesse and 〈◊〉 want of life and cheerefulnesse in thy seruice that an Asse being one of thy dullest creatures Sloth is wont to bee pictured riding on an Asse thou wouldest not bee honoured by the sacrifice of such a beast Thou O Lord louest a swift hearer a cheerefull giuer a zealous Petitioner a voluntary Souldier and a diligent 〈◊〉 for all which purposes thy free and firme Spirit will strongly enable and support mee continually Wherefore establish mee with thy free Spirit O Lord. 13 Then will I teach transgressors thy wayes and sinners or impious persons shall be conuerted vnto thee WHen thou hast vouchsafed graciously to bestow vpon mee those graces whereof I haue gracelesly 〈◊〉 my selfe then will I 〈◊〉 my selfe gratefull vnto thee I will 〈◊〉 that dutie of thankefulnesse so sutable to humanity so agreeable to piety it being a thing good and commendable 〈◊〉 and profitable pleasant and dilectable 〈◊〉 gracefull to returne praises and thankes to thee for thy mercies duly to acknowledge and truly to 〈◊〉 thy singular fauours in such manner as I can and by such meanes as are within the reach of my weake and worthlesse ability I will not follow the common fashion of worldly men who like barrels sound when they are empty but are still when they are full who craue earnestly when they feele want but are dumbe and silent when their turne is serued I solemnely vow and will really performe thankfull acknowledgement for so great benefits when I haue receiued them Thou O God by difburthening man of his sin doest impose a burthen of gratitude vpon him A benefit is a burthen to an ingenuous minde that cannot rest quietly but lyeth shut vp as it were in prison straightly till it haue procured liberty by venting some kinde of retribution Although there can be no proportion betweene thy infinite goodnesse and my not onely finite but infinitely weake meanes of requitall yet inasmuch as for a more bountifull fauour a larger returne of 〈◊〉 is of congruence required and the greatest blessing that can bee bestowed vpon a mortall man in this life is peace of conscience intended by the ioy of thy saluation and implyed in the firme support of thy free Spirit I will indeauour in way of 〈◊〉 to doe thee the best seruice that any man can performe vpon earth that is I will teach thy wayes to Transgressors and cause as much as in me lyeth sinners to bee conuerted vnto thee I will teach such as wander and goe aftray how to come into the way Againe those that goe by-wayes I will teach thy wayes that is the wayes of thy directions which leade vs by a right line as it were through the maze of this miserable world to the land of Canaan that happy country which we should so loue and long for Conuerted sinners are the fittest conuerters of sinners The sickly Physician who hath not onely read in his Booke but felt in his body the maladies whereupon hee is consulted is the likeliest man to worke a cure vpon his patient Goodnesse of it owne nature is apt to spread and inlarge it selfe It is the most naturall and kindly worke of each liuing creature to engender a like vnto it selfe As in nature so is it in nurture also An honest well-disposed man will striue as much as hee can to make others good and godly A chast and sober man will endeauour to restrayne and reclayme others from wantonnesse and drunkennesse the like may bee said of all other vertues and vices The rule of Charity requires that he who hath beene raysed out of the dyrt and reskued out of the myre should lift vp others who lye wallowing therein If we be once inflamed with the loue of God and godlinesse wee shall labour to kindle the zeale of others set them on fire also Bad men are and why should not good men much more become Incendiaries This is the matter and effect of my gratitude which though it may seeme to be no great matter For my goodnesse extendeth not to thee neither art thou any whit the better for my being better any way the grace is thine the good is mine alone yet I know it to bee very aceptable and highly pleasing vnto thee being so louing and gracious so couetous of mans saluation as thou dost euen hunger and thirst after his conuersion Thou dost euen long for our returne home from out of those farre remote countries wherein wee haue wandred and spent our patrimony of thy gifts in wickednesse to
whom shall I addresse my selfe Hell will not the earth cannot relieue me and I dare not lift vp mine eyes to Heauen hauing so highly offended against Heauen and before thee the great King of Heauen I am assailed on euery side assailed by mine own iniquities assailed by thy graces Where may I shrowd my selfe from my sinnes How can I hide mee from my selfe Where may I expect succour Whence may I hope for helpe sithence thy graces which I haue turned into wantonnesse doe conuince me of foule ingratitude doe multiply iniquities vpon me and euen arme thy mercies against me The extremity of my Condition is such as will afford no long time of deliberation In briefe there is one onely way left of escape and euasion and that is by flying from thee to fly to thee to appeale from thy seate of Iustice to thy throne of Mercy as to thy Court of last resort which is alwaies open Either that way or no way can I be rescued from vtter destruction The most odious sinne of desperation wil but plunge me further into the depth of damnation But with the Lord there is maruailous mercy and plenteous redemption By this meanes it is possible without it impossible to saue my sinfull soule Wherefore my resolution is in the lowest degree of humiliation in the deepest straine of contrition faithfully and yet in a sort fearefully to repose my selfe vpon his infinite and vnspeakeable compassion I will pierce mine entralles and pricke the heart of my corrupt heart to the quicke I will let out a flood of teares which are the bloud of my soule I will mingle my zealous and humble prayers with those salt and brackish teares I will knocke hard at his mercy gate and cry aloud Miserere A MEDITATION VPON THE PSALME of Mercy 1. Haue mercy vpon me O God according to thy great mercy and according to the multitude of thy tender compassions blot out my transgressions THAT which I begge at thy hands O God is mercy for of many properties in thee which are all essentiall to thee there is none so vsefull none so delightfull to my perplexed soule as is thy mercy Were it not for thy Mercy thy Maiesty would affright thy Wisedome confound thy Iustice condemne and thy Power destroy me as on the other part through the sweete mixture of thy Mercy thy Maiestie will reuiue thy Wisedome enlighten thy Iustice acquit thy Power preserue me and euery of thy other Attributes will contribute to the aduancement of my inestimable benefit and endlesse good In Mercy all my prayers and petitions are comprized by Mercy all my defects and desires are satisfied for Mercy all my prayses and thankes are returned Euery thing that hath being doth naturally affect continuance and well being Euery Man doth or should desire his chiefe good and true happinesse which consists in thy remission of his sinnes in his reconciliation to thee and that is the blessed and kindely fruite of thy gracious and tender mercy alone A sinner I am and who is not Therefore I cannot seeke for happines in freedome from sinne that is aboue the nature of man but in the free pardon of my sinne by grace which surmounts all the sinnes of all the world Thou didst looke downe O Lord from all eternity out of thy highest throne of Heauen by way of Suruey among the sonnes of men in all ages and generations all things and persons being euer present vnto thee to see if there were any that would vnderstand and seeke after thee But vpon exact enquiry returne was made they were all found corrupt and abominable There was not one that did good no not one Which for greater vehemency and euidence of the truth is repeated the second tyme and purposely recorded by an infinite foresight to take away all colour of doubt and to impose perpetuall Silence to such as afterwards might deceiue themselues and abuse others with an opinion of their owne iustice and holinesse as answerable to thy diuine law and meritorious of thy louing fauour Wherfore I present this lamentable supplication and sing this dolefull ditty though framed for my selfe 〈◊〉 yet fitting euery of the sonnes of Adam generally Haue Mercy vpon mee O God I call vpon thee O God at this time by the name of Elohim which purports the Trinity of Persons and not of Iehouah which denotes the Vnity of substance in the Godhead for my threefold sinne doth iustly occasion mee to fixe mine eyes vpon the Three persons distinctly Vpon thee O Father who art power against whom I haue offended by abuse of my regall Power in murdering Captaine Vriah and his whole troope Vpon thee O Sonne who art Wisedome by vsing finenesse and fraud in carrying closely and cunningly contriuing the murder Vpon thee O holy Ghost who art goodnesse whom I haue grieued by defiling my hands with blood and body with 〈◊〉 which is or should be thy temple and habitation When I implore thy great Mercie I imply my great misery The Phisick of the body must be attempered to the malady If the receipt be giuen vnder the due Dosis it may moue but it will not remoue the peccant humors Desperate diseases must haue soueraigne 〈◊〉 for meane medicines will neuer cure great griefes If the plaster bee too skant for the sore If the wound be not throughly teinted and wholy couered it will neuer bee well cured or soundly recouered As it is in the diseases and sores of he body so is it also in 〈◊〉 of the soule One deepe 〈◊〉 another the depth of sinne requires the depth of grace and a depth of misery calleth for a depth of mercy If I aske my selfe why is thy Mercy great for that there is no cause of thy mercy but thy Mercy I must answere by the effect Because thou canst 〈◊〉 my soule from the nethermost hell from such anguish of body from such perplexity of spirit from such terrors and torments as are ready to ouerwhelme mee in the pit of destruction If I aske how great is thy Mercy I must giue an answere answerelesse I know it to be meruailous great but how great it is I cannot comprehend The immensity of it I haue assayed to shadow out by such resemblances as the world affords to outward sence for the shallow conceits and weake capacities of mortall men being not able with my thoughts to reach much lesse with my tongue or penne to expresse it The height of thy mercy I 〈◊〉 to the altitude of the Heauen aboue the Earth the bredth to the distance of the East from the West the depth to the affection of parents to their children butalas these are no euen matches for that which is limited and finite hath no proportion at all with that which is vnlimited and infinite Thy Mercy O Lord is as thou art thou art great without quantity as thou art good without quality Thou art not merciful but mercy not good but goodnesse not louing but
pleasing because they were offered with a louing and sincere heart vnto thee Thou doest not accept the person for the sacrifice but the sacrifice for the persons sake The truth and sincerity of the heart is all in all with thee Lastly that it is not so much any vprightnesse in me in regard of the worth and dignity much lesse of the perfection and purity of it that ministers this comfort vnto mee but as it is a fruit of thy fauour and a token of thy loue not it selfe so much as that whereof it giueth me assurance and that in two respects First as it is a signe and seale of my Adoption assuring me that I am thine adopted child For my regeneration whereby this sincerity is wrought in me doeth ratifie and seale vp my Adoption the old man harboureth no such ghest None are thy Adopted but such as are thy regenerated children and on the other part all that are thine by Regeneration are thine by Adoption also Now as earthly parents loue their children not so much for their wit and comelinesse as because they are theirs so doest thou O God loue thy children because they are thy children If thou doest not loue them before they haue they shall neuer haue any thing to make them bee loued of thee So then this beginning of true grace argueth thy child and a weake child of thine being yet thy child as well as a strong may in that regard expect a childes portion in thy heauenly inheritance Secondly as it is an earnest or Gods-penny of my glorification For this sincerity is the earnest of that Spirit which thou giuest me before-hand for full 〈◊〉 of the faithfull performance of all thy gracious promises afterward Therefore as a penny giuen in earnest bin deth as strongly as a pound the person that giueth it being a sufficient man Euen so the least measure of true grace being thy earnest bindes thee to the faithfull ac complishment of all thy fauours promised to all thy faithful seruants whatsoeuer It is thou only ô Lord that preparest my heart and workest this truth in it and thou wilt neuer frustrate the desire that thou thy selfe hast there wrought As no man canseeke thee but hee that hath found thee so no man can desire grace but hee that hath grace for euermore hee that desireth Grace hath grace to desire it It is thy gracious Proclamation The Lord God will be mercifull yea hee hath beene alreadie and is mercifull to those that set their hearts aright that desire to feare his name Whereupon I take heart and say Then shall I not bee confounded when I haue respect to all thy precepts and when I am vpright with my God The louing kindnesse of the Lord is from euer and for euer vpon those that thinke vpon his commandements to doe them and therefore vnto such also is ioy in plaine termes promised The righteous shall bee glad in the Lord and trust in him and all without exception that are but vpright in heart shall reioyce And therefore hauing by warrant of the blessed Spirit pronounced them blessed not that neuer sinned but that haue sincerely repented their sinnes and in whose soule there is no guile I conclude with an Iniunction awarded vnder the seale of the same Spirit and laid vpon all such to reioyce Be glad ye righteous and reioyce in the Lord be merry not onely in your owne selues and soules but euen with acclamations and iubilations shout for ioy all you that are vpright in heart The summe of all is I doe not finde my heart so free from sin or so full of grace as it would and should bee but I finde it to be true plaine and vpright wherein I appeale to thee O thou searcher of hearts not such as hath no sinne for it hath in a manner nothing but sinne but such as loues no sinne not such as wants no grace but such as is hum bled for want of grace hauing the grace to feele that want 6. In the secret of my heart thou shalt teach me wisdome or Thou shalt teach the seacrets of wisdome in my heart or hidden part THe conscience of my vnfained sorrow for sin on the one side my true desire to serue thee better hereafter on the other doe raise my dciected soule and make me beleeue and hope that thou in thy gracious goodnesse wilt teach me more wisedome euen the mystery of godlinesse and art of Religion which is the soule of the soule in the secret of my heart I say thou shalt because I begge earnestly and hope confidently that thou wilt teach mee such Wisedome The teaching of the inward man by the true instruction of heauenly wisdome the end wherof is eternall saluation belongeth to thee alone It is thy proper and peculiar worke whereupon thine elect ones are termed The taught of God for flesh and blood reueales not these things vnto me Hee hath his chaire in heauen that teacheth the heart and to thy schollers it is only giuen to know the secrets of thy Kingdome Therefore I trust thou wilt teach me thy wayes and thy statutes thou wilt open mine eyes that I may sce the wonders of thy Law thou wilt giue me true vnderstanding and send me thy good Spirit as a perfect Pylot to leade and guide me into all truth goodnesse This is the wisedome of the heart and brest not of the head and braine whereby I shall become not more learned or politicke but more godly 〈◊〉 vertuous not more able to discourse and dispute but to doe and liue well 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 become righteous that is by a little variati on of the word right wise For whē all is said done That is right wisedome which makes me wise vnto Saluation That is not seeming and shining but sound and solid wisedome that is reall and operatiue not speculatiue and formall wisedome The true information and thereby Reformation of the soule is the soule of wisedome It is neuer taught enough which is neuer sufficiently learned and this wisedome is of that nature that the soule is neuer satiated therewith but is still hungry and couetous of more I haue heard and read many lessons by way of instruction in this wisedome but either through my dulnesse I could not apprehend them or through my obliuion I could not remember thē or through my infirmity I could not practise them Howbcit by the supereminent authority of thee the Teacher the excellencie of the matter taught and the increase of my diligence all happily concurring together I hope at length to attaine the depth of wisedome in the deepe and secret corners of my heart 7 Purge me with Hysope and I shall be cleane THe tongue wil be licking where the tooth is aking the finger will be touching where the paine is fretting The Leprosie of my sinne is so irkesome and lothsome vnto mee as
I cannot but it erate my earnest Petition and re-enforce my humble Prayer to bee purged thereof and for the fitter application and better operation of the purgation to bee purged with Hysope Thou O Lord didst appoint Hysope to be vsed in thy Law for diuers purposes In the institution of the Passeouer the blood of the Lambe was appointed to bee sprinkled vpon the doore cheekes with a bunch of Hysope and with a Scarlet lace In the purgation of the Leper the bunch of Hysope was to bee dipped in the blood of the Sparrow In the burning of the red Heifer which was to bee chosen without spot or wrinckle the Priest was to put in Hysope besides Cedar wood and Scarlet By the blood of the Lambe the Sparrow and the red Heifer the blood of that immaculate Lambe was vndoubtedly prefigured and represented By the bunch of Hysope the besprinkling of the soule with that blood and the applying of it thereunto by faith by the red or crimson lace the vnion and communion of thy Saints was shaddowed who are tyed together by a True-loues knot and sprinkled with that same blood for the remission of their sinnes Whiles I suruey the vertues and qualities of this herbe to vnfold this riddle of thy Law I may iustly take occasion as to magnifie thy goodnesse O God who hast prouided so powerfull a medicine to cure all mans corruptions so to obserue thy wisedome who for our better apprehension hast so fitted the signe and figure to the thing signified and represented thereby Hysope whence I borrow this Allegory hath many things whereby it doth aptly and neerly resemble Christ. It is obscure base and low the Hysope as the lowest herbe is opposed to the Cedar as the tallest tree In the person of Christ I haue said I am a worme and no man the reproach of men and despised of the people all they that see me doe scoffe at me they 〈◊〉 a mowe with the lip and they wagge the head Hysope growes of it selfe among stones not planted by man Christ was hewne out of the Rocke without hands Hysope is bitter and sowre vnpleasing to the taste so Christ his Crosse by which we are crucified to the world the world vnto vs is harsh and vnsauourie to flesh and blood Though Hysope bee sowre it is wholesome for the body The bitter medicines are euer the better so the Recipe of repentance albeit odious to the flesh is most profitable to the soule The doctrine which is seasoned with salt and Hysope is fitter for vs then that which is sweetened with honey For on the one side honey was neuer appointed to be vsed in any sacrifice on the other side not any sacrifice but was to bee seasoned with salt Hysope as Physicians tell is powerfull to purge the lungs The humility of Christ like Hysope doth purge our pride which floteth in the lungs and is discouered by the fuming puffing and blowing thereof Hysope being hot in operation doth cut and extenuate the grosse and flegmaticke humours of the body So true grace takes away all the dulnesse and drowzinesse of my Spirit makes me feruent in prayers and zealous in holy duties Hysope euacuateth the body nourisheth the natiue colour cureth the biting of Serpents prouoketh the appetite sharpeneth the sight warmeth the blood cooleth Feauers So grace purgeth by contrition spitteth foorth by confession warmeth by charitie seasoneth by temperance quencheth the fiery inflamations of vnruly passions maketh vs hungry after righteousnesse quicke-sighted to discerne our own errours and faults yeeldeth remedies against the stings of concupiscence restores againe that spirituall vigour which we daily lose by our manifold transgressions Hysope hath many vertues and properties if well vsed for the health of our bodies But that which is shaddowed by it towit the bloud of Christ cures all the diseases of the soule and clenseth vs from all our sinnes With Hysope this blood is sprinkled vpon vs that is by faith it is applied to our consciences to purge and purifie them from dead workes 7 Wash me O Lord and I shall be whiter then snow BEcause I finde my selfe so spotted with the staines so polluted with the dirt and drosse of my sinne so soone soyled againe after my washing euen in the teares of repentance so prone with the Dog to returne to my vomit with the Hog to the myre wherein I formerly wallowed therefore I harpe still vpon this string which I touched before I doe iterate this Petition also and cry againe Wash me c. If thou Lord bee pleased to wash mee often and thorowly I shall not onely be freed from the foule blacknesse which my grieuous sinnes haue cast vpon mee but I shall become neate faire and white yea whiter then snow If I wash my selfe with snow water saith holy Iob and make my hands neuer so cleane yet shalt thou plunge me in the ditch or myre that is thou shalt discouer an vncleannes in me which was not perceiued before and mine own clothes shall abhorre me But if thou Lord bee pleased to wash me I shall be whiter then snow that is I shall abandon all euill affections and preserue my heart pure and holy consecrating all the faculties of my soule and members of my body to thy true and sincere seruice Can the Blackamore change his skinne or the Leopard quit his spots If that cannot be yet thou O Lord canst so wash me that I shall be whiter then snow That which is impossible by nature is possible and factible by grace That foulenesse which is propagated to mee by discent and bred in me by naturall generation as also nourished and increased by continual actuall transgression is not only remooued but quite changed by free iustification and supernaturall regeneration If my sinnes bee as red as skarlet thou canst make them as white as wooll if they bee like crimson thou canst make them whiter then snow O wonderfull mysterie O incomprehensible miracle that blood should make me white that the washing and bathing of my soule in the blood of that immaculate Lambe should make wee whiter then snow that euen the garments of thy Saints by washing in this blood should become white which yet shall bee reuealed to and wrought vpon thy Saints I shall bee white heere by grace yea whiter then snow I shall bee bright heereafter in glory brighter then the starres yea then the Sunne in the firmament grace heere shall be the beginning of glory there and glory there shall bee the complement and perfection of grace here This is arcanum 〈◊〉 diuini a secret of thy Diuine state and gouernement which thou shalt I am hopefull thou wilt not onely teach by infallible demonstration but also worke by thy blessed Spirit his powerfull operation in the secrets of my heart The cause of the snow his whitenesse is held by Philosophers to bee the store of ayre shut vp by the
extremity of cold in the cleere water that distilleth from the cloudes Thy celestiall ayre and light which surpasseth all bodily and naturall whitenesse being gathered into my soule when it is melting into the teares of repentance makes it cleere and bright euen to admiration Christ by washing my soule hath taken my spots out of mee vpon himselfe hee himselfe remaines all 〈◊〉 and stained with my sinnes insomuch that the Spouse is amazed at it and wondring demands Wherfore doest thou weare garments all spotted and dyed with blood like vnto them that stampe grapes in the wine-presse Thy seruant Moses out of his kinde and vndeserued loue tooke an Aethiopian woman to his wife No wife is deformed in her owne husbands eyes if he be such a husband as he ought to be The mysticall Moses who in loue hath married himselfe vnto his Spouse the Church not onely blacke and deformed but vgly and filthy in her selfe hath by his gracious election of her though neither by her beauty nor manners recommended vnto him made her because he so esteemeth her faire comely and graceful he hath changed her color and complection yea and her nature and condition too so as she sticks not to say I was black by nature but I am faire by grace Can that which is blacke as Pitch or Ebeny become perfectly white and whiter then snow yes verily for my state by adoption and regeneration in Christ is of more perfection then Adam his happiest condition in Paradise This might and did faile that can neuer alter or decay but abides firme and sure to all eternity Blacke by the art of man can take no other hue nor can this whitenes by the fraud or force of the prince of darkenesse be euer either darkned or defaced Snow is white without and within on euery side Thy Grace will make mee not like a painted sepulcher faire without and foule within not hypocritically specious but really sound and sincere and the beauty of the soule thus washed will infinitely exceede the whitenesse of any body yea euen of snow it selfe Make mee to heare of 〈◊〉 and gladnesse c. O Lord I beg of thee the whole tree of life growing by the riuer side in the Garden of Eden whose roote is iustification by remission of my sinnes and whose fruite is true ioy and consolation in thy gracious fauour There may bee a roote without a stocke as when a Tree is hewne downe a stocke without 〈◊〉 as in the winter season but nor fruite nor stocke where no roote is The forgiuenesse of my sinne is the root of all my ioy O Lord giue me the fruite of that roote and that will assure me of the roote of that fruite Vnlesse thou make me I cannot heare Vnlesse thou open mine eare the voice of gladnesse will not enter or if it goe in at the one it will go out at the other eare I shall be neuer the better for hearing Thou must not only tel me the tale but finde me eares also thou must not onely present the obiect but enable my faculty also to perceiue or receiue it The Adder or Cockatrice is as some say naturally as some others cunningly deafe laying the one eare close to that ground stopping the other with his tayle purposely to preuent the skill of the Charmer who seekes to enchant him in such sort as he shall not be able either to bite or sting So man in his pure or rather impure naturals is either sencelesly deafe and cannot or voluntarily deafe and will not heare any voice that tends to the spirituall solace of his soule no not the sound of sound ioy not the melodious noise of true gladnesse vnlesse thou that sendest the tidings of Grace doe giue him the grace also to entertaine those tidings Now what is the end and indeuor either of this corruption by nature or peruersenesse by will but that none of thy words or spels O God none of thy holy Spirit his motions or inclinations may haue power wickednesse being so powerfull to charme or inchant me but that I may still bite and sting still hurt and annoy both my selfe and others I desire ioy and gladnesse doubled that is both of soule and body and I cannot rest contented with one or two or a few comforts I seeke to haue them multiplied that as my tribulations were increased so in like proportion my consolations may be inlarged and I terme this ioy and gladnesse indefinitely because this is the onely solid ioy and true gladnesse All other ioyes are but toyes like false fires and counterfet 〈◊〉 such as deserue not the name of ioyes at all I beseech thee O Lord not onely to blot out my transgressions and to take away the guilt of my sins but for the raising of my deiected the relieuing of my distressed soule to let me know so much also let me heare this ioyfull Word in the eare of my heart from thine owne mouth by thine holy breath and Spirit Thy sins are forgiuen thee Not onely bee vnto me a Sauiour but say vnto my soule I am thy saluation For I may stand pardoned and iustified in thy gracious 〈◊〉 and certaine resolution and yet not know so much and not knowing it how can I be but grieuously perplexed fearefully distracted in my conscious distrustfull cogitations Wherefore O Lord let thy Spirit certifie my spirit that All is peace Let my soule sensibly feele though it cannot fully conceiue this peace which passeth all vnderstanding To a Prisoner conuicted and condemned for high treason to cruell death and euery houre expecting execution according to course of Iustice what greater ioy can there bee then to heare of a gracious and free pardon of all his offences from his Soueraigne This is the true character of my selfe and euery other sinner in respect of our spirituall condition Wee were damned before wee were borne in sinne since our birth wee haue liued in sinne we haue multiplied sinne vpon sinne wee haue drunke vp iniquity as a fish drinketh vp water wee haue committed sundry hainous and horrible treasons against thy diuine 〈◊〉 to say nothing of other capitall crimes wee haue after all this wilfully drawne downe thine indignation and called for thine eternall vengeance vpon vs In this deplorable and euen desperate case what more welcome tydings then to heare of this Iubile Sinne doth not onely bring me into a dull slumber but euen into a dead sleepe also In sleepe all my sences are bound vp as it were in chaines when I am fast asleepe I heare nothing at all Wherefore awake me O Lord and make me to heare Make mee to heare thy Word the conduit of comfort openly taught with such diligence and deuotion as is meete make mee to heare the secret whisperings of thy blessed Spirit with such reuerence and obedience as is requisite make me so to heare as I may beleeue faith commeth by hearing with thy blessing
and then I shall not faile to heare of this redoubled ioy and gladnesse which my sorrowfull perplexed soule doth so much hunger and thirst after I doe the more earnestly desire and affectionately long to heare of this ioy because it is an assay and foretaste of that ioy which I hope fully to enioy in heauen it is not the pawne or pledge that must bee returned againe but the earnest or Godspenny which continues still with the receiuer of a farre greater ioy heereafter and where thou giuest earnest thou neuer failest to performe the bargaine This ioy is great in the present exhibition far greater in the future expectation no meane ioy in the meane time while I liue in this valley of teares the life of grace but glorious and vnspeakable ioy hereafter in the life of glorie such ioy in the end as shall be without end in the heauenly 〈◊〉 where there shall be peace without trouble plenty without want light without darkenesse health without sickenesse melody without discord security without feare felicity without misery ioy without interruption or intermission ioy vpon ioy ioy exceeding all ioy without or beyond which there is no ioy at all If I heare this word of comfort in this life which giueth mee title and interest Thy sinne is forgiuen thee I shall be sure then to heare the warrant for possession and fruition Enter good seruant into thy Masters ioy Without this ioy there is nothing but disquiet and discomfort nothing but 〈◊〉 and horror nothing but apprehension of wrath and vengeance The wicked who heareth nothing of this ioy feeleth no serenitie or tranquillity of minde but as holy Iob saith is like a woman that is alwayes in trauaile like the raging sea still foaming and casting vp dirt and myre on the other part the penitent sinner who in anguish of soule harkeneth after these tydings deriueth ioy from the wel-head where there is Gods plenty as they say fulnesse of most sweet and delightfull comforts euen a torrent or strong running streame of pleasures flowing perpetually He shall haue incomparably more ioy than the worldling whose corne and wine and oyle are increased and therefore may lay him downe in peace and rest in security because thou makest him to dwell in safetie Such as the matter is whereof ioy ariseth and consisteth such is the ioy it selfe If the matter bee slight flitting and momentary as the world and the flesh are how can the ioy be constant solid and durable On the other side the ioy that is grounded vpon so precious a foundation as remission of sinne and reconciliation with thee how can it bee but vnchangeable and inexplicable This ioy will eate vp all false ioyes and flitting delights which men fansie to take in the pleasures of sinne as the Rod of Aaron did deuoure the rods of the Aegyptian Sorcerers This ioy like water will quench and extinguish all the hot desires and fiery lusts of the world and the flesh whatsoeuer That the bones which thou hast broken may reioyce I made my moane heeretofore that my bones were sore vexed that there was no peace or rest in them by reason of my sinne I now professe that they were not only crushed and bruized but euen disioynted and broken that is the most strong able powers and faculties of my soule and body which I describe by the name of bones haue been oppressed battered as it were with the terrible pangs and restles tortures which I haue suffered by the hammer of thine indignation conceiued against my grieuous and enormous transgressions But if thou Lord wilt now be pleased after my vnfained repentance to make me heare of this ioy and gladnesse all these bones 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 with the 〈◊〉 and marrow of thy 〈◊〉 shall in iust 〈◊〉 and 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 cry out Lord who is 〈◊〉 vnto thee It is thy 〈◊〉 and manner of proceeding O Lord with thy dearest children Thou makest the wound and bindest it vpagaine thou smitest and healest againe thou killest and quickenest againe thou castest downe to the nethermost hell and thou raisest vp againe to the heauen of heauens shewing and declaring thereby thine irresistable power to worke mine humble obedience 〈◊〉 vnspeakable wisedome to breed my reuerent admiration thy seuere Iustice to beget mine awefull feare thy supereminent tender mercy to purchase mine affectionate loue towards thee The deeper mine humiliation is the greater will bee mine exaltation the sowrer the sorrow is the sweeter will the succeeding gladnesse prooue when thou shalt please to affoord it vnto me for not my spirit onely but all the parts of my soule and body will exceedingly reioyce when after these tempestuous stormes I shal safely arriue at the hauen of rest and contentment For as water is more grateful to the way-faring man after a long drought and a calme more 〈◊〉 to a sea-faring man after a terrible tempest so will my deliuerance bee after my tribulation O how beautifull will thy mercy appeare after the depth of my miserable affliction How shall I reioyce 〈◊〉 euer I was sorrowfull How shall my bones bee glad that euer they were broken I shall gratefully acknowledge that thy 〈◊〉 and thy staffe haue 〈◊〉 mee that is I shall take comfort that euer I was chastized with them and that according to the multitude of my griefes thy consolations haue made my minde ioyfull that is for euery sorrow that I receiued in time of my tribulation I shall receiue a consolation after my deliuerance O then what a madnesse is it to buy a little vaine idle frothie and momentany pleasure at so deare a rate as the vexation and anguish the terrors and tortures both of soule and body which none can conceiue by imagination but he that feeleth and he that feeleth is not able by any representation to expresse Hide thy face from my sinnes and blot 〈◊〉 all my transgressions Because my sinne is the source of my sorrow and the bane of my blisse I make this the burthen of my song and doe reiterate my Prayer for pardon I beseech thee once againe O Lord either to remooue thy sense from the obiect or the obiect from thy sense hide thine eyes from such an vgly sight looke another way behold any thing rather then it or if being all Eye thou canst not but see all things that are and so all my sinnes if they be at all O Lord blot them out let not them be to be seene blot them out all and at once vna litura with one dash of thy pen efface all my transgressions Hide thy face not from me but from my sinnes Thou hast charged me louingly Seeke my face and I haue answered resolutely Thy face Lord will I seeke If thou withdraw thy face from me woe is me I shall bee like those that goe downe into the bottomlesse pit wherefore still shew me the light of thy countenance looke vpon thy
not onely in the aliens reprobates but euen in the domesticks of the houshold of faith in thy most inlightned and best disposed children euen in the Elect themselues and those that are sealed vp for the Day of Redemption Wherefore I must say freely as I may truly I am thy workemanship not onely of thy power as all other creatures are but of thy mercy also created in Christ vnto good workes whereof he is the sole Author and Actor working effecaciously in mee both the will and the deed according to his good pleasure O Lord giue me a liuely Faith thy Gift alone which hath power to quicken my dull to enlyue my dead to purifie my impure heart Giue me grace stedfastly to beleeue thy Word to take sure hold of thy promises euermore to cleaue and sticke fast to thy goodnesse Kindle this fire in my soule which will inflame my loue of all good duties on the one and on the other side waste and consume eate vp and de uoure my concupiscence and all my carnall desires and cause them to returne into that dead sea whence they were first exhaled Renew a right Spirit within me Hee whose spirit is deserted by Gods Spirit loseth the vigor and viuacity of his spirit his spirit waxeth old crooked in him Sinne where it inuades makes such spoile and hauocke of all goodnesse and vertue in the soule as it cannot subsist vnlesse it be timely repaired and truly renewed by repentance When a man lyes groueling vpon earthly and houering vpon fleshly desires his spirit which should directly 〈◊〉 vpward is bowed downe and made crooked A 〈◊〉 spirit then is a sincere and vpright heart raysed and lifted vp into heauen and heauenly things What is sinne else but an obliquity a depriuation or deprauation of that rectitude and vprightnesse which was originally and should be continually in the soule if it were throughly purged and purified I haue impayred this rectitude and vprightnesse which once I had in some measure by my heynous and enormous transgressions and therefore resort to thee for helpe who onely art able to renewe and repaire it againe Giue me O Lord a spirit rectified in it selfe directed by thy Spirit corrected by thy discipline and erected to thy glory a spirit firme without failing constant without varying and durable without decaying that I may happily choose new waies walke in them carefully and perseuere in them constantly giue me grace to turne ouer a new leafe as they say to abandon the old man with the lusts and affections thereof and to put on the new man and so to serue thee in holinesse and newnesse of liuing all the dayes of my life hereafter I doe wittingly and thankefully ascribe the purity of my heart to thy Creation the vprightnesse of my spirit to thy renouation alone as to giue thee thy due honour so to preuent and anticipate the proud and fond conceit of those men if any such there be or shall be hereafter who to grace thēselues wil abate the power diminish the lustre of thy grace who though they cannot but confesse that they neede the assistance of thy Spirit that they are holpen by thy both preuenting and following grace yet betweene those two graces for their own credit will needes vainely interpose or rather violētly intrude mans reason whereby he chuseth what is good and mans will whereby he assenteth to thy diuine power in the blessed worke of regeneration But hereby I take secret comfort in my selfe to preserue my perplexed soule from vtter despaire that I discerne the foulenesse of my heart feele the weaknes of my spirit and therefore pray earnestly for a purification of the one and a renouation of the other for I know I cannot craue either of those graces without some measure of grace As the sunne cannot be seene but by the Sunne nor the light be perceiued but by meanes of the light so neither can I begge a full cleansing of my heart without some cleanenesse in it nor a through-renouation without some newnesse in my decayed spirit at least in true affection and vnfaigned desire Cast me not away from thy presence and take not thy holy Spirit from me I feare and cannot but feare thy face and yet I feare withall to be cast from thy face 〈◊〉 presence Mine owne 〈◊〉 makes me on the one side to feare the face of a seuere Iudge and my worthlesse weaknesse on the other being not able to subsist at all without the light of thy countenance makes mee desire thy presence and sight What-euer thou doe with me while thou lookest vpon me I shall indure though not without feare and perplexity But if thou cast me quite away from thy presence I am vtterly vndone for euer The presence of the Physicion is a present if not helpe yet comfort to the sicke patient But thy presence Lord being the soueraigne Physicion ministers all comforts and cures all maladies both of soule and body Therefore I loue the habitations of thy house and the place where 〈◊〉 honour dwelleth As the hunted and chased Hart desireth the water brookes So longeth my soule after thee When shall I come and appeare before thee O how amiable are thy Tabernacles My soule euen longeth and fainteth for the courts of the Lord. One day in thy Courts where thou art present and resident is better then a thousand elsewhere I had rather bee a dorekeeper there then to dwell at liberty and in iollity in the tents of the vngodly The priuation of Gods presence is the position of all misery and the withdrawing of his countenance drawes with it all manner of discomforts Heauen it selfe were not heauen if thou wert not there present and Hell could not be hell if thou wert not absent thence To bee cast out of thy presence is to be cast out of ioy into sorrow out of light into darkenesse out of life into death not the first onely but the second also out of heauē into hel The very sight and vision of thee is of it selfe and in it selfe the height of happinesse In thy presence is the fulnesse of ioy and at thy right hand is plenty without satiety of pleasure and delight for euermore Wherefore though I haue multiplyed and increased my contumacie beyond all measure yet I beseech thee O Lord not to excommunicate me I submit my selfe with teares in mine eyes and anguish in my heart humbly and wholly to thy discipline I am content to endure any penance rather then to bee banished from thy presence What the want of this presence is none can know but he that feeleth and he that feeleth cannot make another know by any relation Hee may indeuour to shaddow it out slenderly but hee is not able fully to expresse it If the Master turne his seruant out of doores if the Father abandon his sonne from his fight if the King command his subiect from the Court that hee come not within the Vierge how
slaine from the beginning of the world yet as a fruite of our repentance expects from vs a holy reuenge vpon our selues We must iudge our selues that wee bee not iudged and least our iudgements become fruitlesse and elusory We must put them in execution seuerely without pitty or partiality Let vs therefore preuent his face of Maiesty his countenance of Authority by confession wich confession is a profession of forsaking our former faults The Iudge we cannot the iudgement we may preuent if we take the opportunity and repent truly and timely of our sinnes thou wilt mercifully and graciously repent thee of the iudgements denounced doomed against vs. Therefore it be houeth euery man to keepe a Court at home and therin to sit as chiefe iustice to indict and arraigne himself at the barre of his owne conscience where he findes the fault there to inflict punishment In as much as at these Assizes the heart must needes be found the greatest offender because from the heart doth flow all vaine and sinfull imaginations all idle and wicked words all lewde and scandalous actions let him doe Iustice vpon his heart in the first place let him correct the pride of it by humiliation the wantonnesse of it by contrition the iolity of it by sorrow the stubornenesse of it by weeping the gluttony of it by fasting the couetousnesse of it by almes-giuing and so according to the rule of Physicke cure each contrary by his contrary affection The physicke must bee applied to that part of the body which is ill affected the salue laid vpon the place that is sore Where the sinne breedes swels there must the sinner cut and launce He must pricke his heart to the quicke and let out store of teares as the former and latter rayne As our hearts haue beene fatted and pampered as it were with sinne so they should grow leane and meagre againe by sorrow for sinne Looke how much the lesse I spare my selfe so much the more wilt thou spare me My repentance doth in a sort execute thy vengeance and with a temporall vexation doth preuent and auoide thine eternall damnation by casting me downe it lifts me vp by making me vgly in mine own it presents me pure in thine eyes by accusing it doth excuse by condemning it doth acquite me It is a kind of vnhappinesse to be seared and cauterized with an hot yron and fretted with an eating powder but those meanes and medicines which doe cure by sharpenesse and sowernesse by the benefit which they procure doe excuse their distastfulnes and by the succeeding profit do allay the present paine By sin thy spirit takes occasiō to increase grace not by the nature of sinne but by the soueraignety of that spirit which euen of sinnes makes a plaister against sin For I being as sicke of sorrow as of sinne may hopefully resort to thee the Physitian of my soule whose end of comming into the world is to cure the sicke especially such as feele themselues sicke enen at the heart I must breake my golden Calfe that is any idoll of sinne which my corrupt heart doth serue and worship I must burne it with zeale and with contrition grinde it to powder and then strowing it vpon the water of teares drinke it vp againe By this thy gracious meanes an Antidote will bee drawne out of poyson the oyle will cure the bitings of Scorpions the worme wil gnaw the wood the moth the cloth that bred it the very excrements of my sinfull soule like dung and mannor will fatten and make it fruitefull in goodnesse The hunted and wounded Hart by eating of an herbe knows how to helpe and heale himselfe and to make the arrow that pierced his ribbes to fall to the ground The Swallow when she hath put out the eyes of her young ones knowes by an herbe of her owne name how to restore their sight againe Thy herbe of grace the iuyce whereof is our repentance doth expell the fiery darts of Sathan shot by sinne into our soules and this eye-salue doth cause vs though neuer so much blinded with sinne to see both our error in committing and thy mercy in pardoning our offences The most powerfull rhetoricke to mooue thee to pitty is repentance and the most delightfull Musicke in thine eares is that dolefull ditty tuned to a trembling tongue and a quauering voyce peccaui in coelum c. Against thee against thee onely I haue offended The string bends the strongest bowe the fire mollifies the hardest steel the Goates blood breakes euen the Adamant I hope my harts humble and melting repentance will appease thy hottest and heauiest indignation conceiued against me The most worne and torne linnen by contusion and grinding in the Mill makes smooth and white paper Euen so my most base and rotten ragges of vanity and wickednesse by true contrition with thy benediction will produce a cleane heart and renew a right spirit within mee The corruption and consumption of the one will prooue the generation or regeneration of the other To sacrifice to kill are expressed by one and the same word in holy writ because euery sacrifice was slaine in thy Leuiticall lawe but this breaking of my heart and offering my body in sacrifice to thee is an Euangelicall sacrifice because therin which may seeme strange the sacrifice is slaine and yet liueth For it is my faith not my death which thou seekest thou thirstest for my holy desires not my polluted blood thou art appeased with my willingnesse to renounce the world not with my departure out of the world This was Abraham the Father of all thy faithfull ones his sacrifice which thou requiredst of him For what did Abraham but offer his owne body in his Son What didst thou require of him but his Faith who as thou diddest command his Sonne to be offered so thou wouldest not suffer him to be killed I hold it a wise and an aduantageous course in any man to dye to sinne that hee may liue to righteousnesse to mortifie the old man that hee may bee quickened in the new to dye daily that hee may liue eternally Wherefore I will dye that I may not dye I will wound my hart with temporary contrition that I may auoyde the deadly wounds of 〈◊〉 who desires my euerlasting destruction I will liue a dying life that I may not dye a 〈◊〉 death For thy sake are we killed all the day long and right deare in thy sight is this death of thy Saints Here I can bee contented to stirre vp an holy emulation betweene those that thus dye and such as are stoned burned or otherwise done to death for defence of thine honor and testimony of thy trueth who by excellency are termed Martyrs These dye but once and at once their paine is soone past but the other dye a lingering death they dye daily and continually It is accounted a mittigation of cruelty and a
kind of mercy to put men to death quickely This Martyrdome of mortification God doth highly prize without that other which is by effusion of blood this must goe before that and that without this is of no worth nor deserues the name of Martyrdome at all Whose Martyrdome shall I dare to compare with the various hideous and tedious sufferings of holy Iob The best is this contention for immortalitie will not onely be mortall but soone at an end The Martyrs of both sorts so I tearme them because they dye in and for thee shall haue fulnesse of felicity to satiate their largest desires for they both shall haue both ioy without measure and life without end they shall both enioy abundance of pleasures at thy right hand for euermore The summe of all is I must drench and drowne my sinnes and the corrupt affections of my wicked heart in the sea of sorrowfull repentance and then my soule will nimbly and swiftly swim to the land of promise and hauen of happinesse They that will offer this sacrifice their hearts must fall from the high mountaine of pride downe into the lowest valley of humiliation and they must bee bruised with the fall pained with the bruise I will present an humble bruised and sorrowfull heart vnto thee Thou O Lord art nigh to them that are of a contrite spirit who speake to thee in bitternesse their soule who crye like the Draggon and Ostriche for griefe of their sinnes committed They who cry De profundis out of the deepe are not in the deepe their very crye reares and raises them vp Thine eare is within mans heart thou perceiuest the hearts first relenting before it come to the tongues relating I did purpose and say within my selfe I will confesse my sinne and thou tookest notice thereof and forgauest the iniquity of my sinne Thus saith the High and lofty One that inhabiteth eternity whose Name is holy 〈◊〉 dwell in the High and holy place with whom with him that is of a contrite and humble spirit to what end to reuiue the spirit of the humble and to reuiue the heart of the contrite ones Thou wilt not despise nay thou wilt highly prize graciously receiue 〈◊〉 and comfort thou wilt giue them beauty for ashes the oyle of ioy for mourning the garment of gladnesse for the spirit of heauinesse As a bone in the arme or legge once broken and being well set againe growes stronger then if it had neuer beene broken so our hearts being well and soundly healed by true repentance of the sores and bruises of sinne become more firme and stable then euer they were before Thus my foule fall becomes foelix culpa I am after a sort happy in my vnhappinesse for out of my great misery through thy greatest mercy a greater happinesse doth arise then euer I felt before 18 O be fauourable to Sion for thy good pleasure HEE that prayes to thee must not pray for himselfe alone Howsoeuer hee beginne with prayer for himselfe when he hath gained some interest in thee for himselfe hee may the sooner preuaile for others hee must end with prayer for thy Church hee must not end till hee haue recommended the whole Church in his prayers vnto thee He that is a liuely and feeling member of that mysticall body whereof thy Christ is the head must pray for the whole body As in the naturall body the heart feeles the akeing of the head and the head the oppression of the heart the heart and head both doe resent a fellon in one of the fingers and the gowt in one of the toes the stomacke simpathizeth with the braine and the braine with the stomacke so and much more is it in the mysticall body True Christians are like those Twynnes who are reported to haue wept and laughed slept and waked liued and dyed together They must weepe with them that weepe mourne with those that lament suffer hunger thirst nakednesse and imprisonment with others their brethren afflicted with such crosses participate with them in all their miseries and aduersities what soeuer Captaine Vriah mine honest seruant could say The Arke and Israel and Iudah abide in Tents and my Lord Ioab and the seruants of my Lord are incamped in the open field and shall I then goe into my house to eate and drinke and lye with my Wife While they are in ieopardy I cannot be in iollity while they liue in feare I cannot enioy security Wherefore be fauourable to Sion to thy Church and chosen I being one of them must abide one and the same fortune and condition with them This is that vnion of the Saints in thy Christ that communion of them among themselues which cannot easily bee comprehended much lesse fully expressed and yet must it bee constantly belieued and will be in some measure continually resented The Church is represented by the name of Sion Sion the holy Mountaine in Hierusalem which thou louest from whence thy lawe should come and where thou wilt dwell for euer Iehouah hath chosen Sion and desired it for his seate and said This is my rest here will I sit euen to perpetuity But besides this generall I acknowledge my selfe tyed by a speciall obligation to pray for Sion for there was no let on my part but that the whole kingdome of thy Christ might haue fallen to the ground for I being raised from the dunghill to the Diadem from the Parke to the Pallace from following the Ewes great with young to feede thy people and anoynted King to the end I should gather thy Church together by my Apostasie haue scattered and wasted it so farre forth as there is great cause to feare the vtter ruine and desolation thereof Wherefore by force and in remorse of conscience I beg for the sustentation and preseruation of thy Church through thy free and vndeserued mercy Thou O Lord art the onely founder of this choise Company and corporation As out of thy loue onely thou didst single and select them from other refuse people before the foundation of the world as by the same loue thou hast supported and preserued them amids all dangers and disasters euer sithence so I beseech thee still to continue thine ancient accustomed and affectionate fauour to them Let not my vnhappinesse impeach their happinesse let not the darke and foggy mists of my wickednes ecclipse the light and luster of thy countenance towards them let them be still as deare vnto thee as the apple of thine owne eye doe not spill them for my faults but spare mee and them for thine owne sake Thou doest often and mayest alwaies punish the people for the sins of their Princes Wherefore I beseech thee not onely to pardon my sins to my selfe but to be fauourable to my people also and not to suffer them to smart and suffer for my offences It is I that haue sinned and done euill indeed but as for these sheepe what haue they done let
a greater cannot be bestowed vpon the soule of man whiles it is confined within this valley of teares inclosed within this bodie of death And because through the frailty of my flesh and the fraud of Satan I am so prone to recidiuation and backe shding so ready to fall away from thee euen 〈◊〉 many Apostasies pardoned vnlesse I be still vpheld and supported giue me thy free spirit that 〈◊〉 may cheerefully thy firme spirit that I may constantly accomplish thy blessed will and 〈◊〉 in 〈◊〉 good duties that 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 vnto me And for that thankefulnesse is the best returne for benefits receiued and the strongest meanes to purchase new fauours giue mee grace as to promise so to performe gratitude euery way and euermore highly to esteeme and zealously to affect the reducing reclaiming and conuerting of sinners and impious persons those that erre in their religion or conuersation or both as the most acceptable seruice that can be done vnto thee vpon earth Teach me to vse all earnest compellation and powerfull insinuation to winne thy fauour againe when I haue forfeited it by committing some grieuous sin especially quicken mee by faith to make a particular application and appropriation as it were of thy saluation to mine owne soule which pious presumption and holy ambition thou art well pleased withall Giue me grace with the deepest straine of my hart and the loudest tone and tune of my voyce to magnifie thy marueilous goodnesse Though I be lesse then the least of thy mercies yet teach me in duty and discretion for more bountifull fauours to returne more plentifull praises If I be deliuered from a crying sinne I ought of congruence to sing aloud of thy iustice which giuing assurance of thy mercy by performance of thy couenant of grace cannot but produce an exultation of the heart and an exaltation of the voyce and tongue in the celebration of thy iust praises But alas how can I make that poore returne for thy rich mercies which mee thinkes I ought to vowe and promise When all is done I must therein also craue thy blessed assistance that thou wilt be pleased to open my lips and to vntie my tongue strings I must owe thee for that grace also and goe on thy score euen for those praises which onely by Eccho I resound vnto 〈◊〉 Blessed be thy name O Lord who in my deepest distresse and heauiest condition for my sinnes when I seeke for ease and reliefe tellest mee the meanes whereby thine anger may be appeased and thy fauour redeemed Thou requirest no sacrifice that with labour and charge should bee purchased abroad but such as is or should be at home and within me thou expectest no other satisfaction from me but the humiliation of my proud heart and the sorrow of my rebellious soule O wonderfull goodnesse O vnspeakeable mercie What more fauourable termes can be deuised or propounded then that thou wilt accept my submission and reconciliation so as I will aske thee forgiuenesse humbly and freely professe and expresse effectually mine hearty repentance for the manifold sinnes I haue committed against thy divine Maiestie Out of the the apprehension of this louing kindnesse and tender compassion if there were nothing else I ought to melt into teares of griefe breake my heard hart bruize my obstinate spirit which haue transported me so farre and plunged me so deepe into thy displeasure O Lord inable mee whom thou hast ordained a Priest for this purpose to offer daily and duly this acceptable sacrifice vnto thee which I should the more willingly present because it no way intends the destruction of my body but the correctiō of my soule I am only to slay my sensuality to quell my vnruly affections and subdue them to thy holy will for mine own good not to impech nature but to increase grace and for my better incouragemēt to this mortification thou art graciously pleased to vse this protestation that If I iudge my selfe thou wilt not iudge me if I chastise my selfe thou wilt not condemne mee if I execute my owne iust and vnpartiall sentence against mine owne heart the capitall offender thou wilt fauourably spare and mercifully pardon mee for euer O Lord I pray not for my selfe alone but for thy whole Church wheresoeuer dispersed howsoeuer distressed vpon the face of the earth As I pray that thou wilt bee mercifull to mee particularly so I beg also that thou wilt be fauourable to Sion vniuersally Being a member of that mystical body whereof thy Christ is the head so long as I haue spirituall life in me I cannot but resent such afflictions as any of thy chosen do sustaine ô Lord I pray thee for Ierusalem the kingdom wherein I liue that peace may be within her walls prosperity in her palaces I cannot but out of honest affection wish well to my brethren neighbours and companions that their persons may be protected their walls of wood or stone reedifyed fo often as neede requireth that not for necessity onely but for comelinesse also But I must still professe that I regard the Case for the 〈◊〉 sake which is compassed therewith the Common-wealth for thy house and that portion of thy Church that is preserued therein I respect chiefely Sion thy darling and the ioy of the whole earth My precious goods are imbarqued in that ship What fortune betides them I am contented shall befall me I will sympathise reioyce and mourne with them vpon all occasions I doe acknowledge no neerer affinity no deerer consanguinity no better fraternity then is Christianity nay my spirituall kindred is of more esteeme with mee 〈◊〉 any naturall or legall coniunction whatsoeuer O Lord shew thy fauor to Sion for thy good pleasures sake shee hath no other motiue to induce thee no other mediator to intercede with thee Bee gracious to her for his sake in whom thou art well pleased Be pleased of thy selfe thine owne goodnes for thy selfe thine owne glory to shew this loue vnto thy Spouse though foule in her owne nature yet faire by thy gracious acceptation These graces O Lord which I begge zealously for my selfe and others I beseech thee to grant mercifuly that I may 〈◊〉 thee with prayse and prayse thee with loue that I may thankefully acknowledge thy gracious goodnesse and in testimony thereof render vnto thee all honour and glory all manner of prayses and thankes all the dayes of my life euen for euer and euer Amen FINIS Bern. ad frat in Mon. Tertul. de Paenit Aug. in 〈◊〉 51. Chrysost. in hunc Psalmum Psal. 103. Melius impressum quà m expressum innotescit In his non capit intelligentia nisi quantum attingit 〈◊〉 Bern. in Cant. 3. Qui non gustauerit non intelliget quà m 〈◊〉 sapit mel Aug. in Psal. 30. Rom. 5. Miserationum Dei nec magnitudo mensurari nec multitudo numerari potest Basil. Ierem. 31. Psal. 38. Iob. 7. Iohn 13. Rom. 12. 〈◊〉