all my neglects of my relative Duty I desire to own thy Righteousness and that thou hast punished me less than my Iniquities deserve I bless thee that thou hast spared to me my dear Husband I beseech thee mightily to furnish him with the Gifts and Graces of thy Spirit and give him a long continuance in this Life very instrumental to thy glory the benefit and great advantage of thy Church and People and at last full fruition of thy self in eternal Glory Lord I bless thee that thou still intrusts us Parents to a Child I beseech thee bless this onely one and inable us with much Wisdom and Diligence to exhort instruct and train up for thee her thou hast yet spared to us Good Lord bless her and she shall be blessed Bless her in Soul with the plentifull Effusions of thy Holy Spirit and all the Graces of it Bless her Body with an healthfull Constitution and Honour her with long Life in the ways of Righteousness Suffer not her heart to be set on the gilded Vanities of this World but grant her of the things of this Life what thou thinkest good for her and be thou her God and Portion and when thou shalt conclude her days on Earth I beseech thee receive her to thy heavenly Kingdom Amen Amen I am sensible of the length of the preceding Section and will not make it longer by a needless and useless Apology needless to those who are acquainted with the actings of that sweet Spirit that breathed so fragrantly in her on such occasions and useless to those who are not only Strangers but Enemies to such a temper of Mind and had it contained but twenty lines would have esteemed it too long by fifteen of them I shall endeavour brevity in those which follow SECT XVII Renewed Assaults of her Enemy by Temptation THis was her almost constant trouble for many Years which she used to call emphatically Her Affliction For 't was with her one of his living Members as with our Blessed Lord her and our Head of whom I noted above When the Devil had finished all his present Temptations he departed from him for a season which clearly intimates his returning to renew his Assaults She sometimes had a breathing time vouchsafed her by the gratious Restraints God laid upon her Enemy but usually not very long for using to afford her the best Assistance that I could I sometimes for some Weeks or Months have refrained to mention them that I might not awaken the sleeping Lion and she taking no notice of them I have often said I hope my Dear thou hast been now some good space free from thy Affliction Alas my Dear would she reply with a deep sigh I have kept silence because I would not weary thee with my continual complaints And other whiles would gratefully acknowledge God's goodness in yielding her some Respite some Calms and quiet Intervals Yet after the Day God so strongly comforted her by Habakkuk i. 12. though I cannot say she was wholly free I do not remember she ever complained of her Temptations being either too fierce or frequent as they had been before nor did she once mention them in her last Sickness Blessed be God's goodness to her This cruel but cowardly Enemy usually made his fiercest Onsets when she was exercised with Indisposition of Mind or Body I will give one Instance of each First Under Indisposition of Mind with great Sorrow In the beginning of May 1680. an Affliction befel me my former Troubles returned upon me A wound not healed brake forth with deep Trouble of Mind much Afflicted with blasphemous Suggestions The good Lord rebuke them and with his All-sufficient Grace cast out of my Soul whatever may offend and provoke him to so severe a Scourge which in my own strength I am not able to stand under so unsupportable is the burthen But the good Lord give me to see that by the supporting Grace of his former Compassions I am preserved from the poisonous infection of them Satan taking advantage of my melancholy Disposition growing upon me after the Death of my dearly beloved Child Mrs. Margaret Cox renewed these Assaults And as in such Cases the subtile malitious Enemy will follow his blow home as far as he is suffered and multiply every Molehill into a Mountain as we speak Proverbially so he endeavoured to increase her disquiet by another very small Circumstance For she proceeds in her Complaint I had also a great damp and check on my earnest Endeavours to teach my little Boy his Book He at little more than three Years old would read well in his Primmer on a sudden he forsook it not through any evil Disposition in him I am not able to give an acccount of it but it occasioned me much grief and trouble But I bless God for his Mercy to me Half a Year after I began a-new with him and he hath with greater readiness to it and love of it learned much better than before So indulgently condescending was the divine Goodness to relieve her suitably and prevent the occasions her Enemy catch'd at to disturb her by Secondly Under Indisposition of Body by a long Sickness It pleased God to suffer my old Enemy impetuously to assault me This Visitation was very cloudy which then I could not see through nor apprehend God's Goodness though he vouchsafed many discoveries of his Favour to me I shall not multiply Passages of the same import nor pursue all the Methods her Christian Prudence made use of for her support as frequent Conference with my self and some few choice Christian Friends whom she much esteemed for their great Piety experience in spiritual Matters and prevalence with God in Prayer She made no noise with her Troubles revealed them but to few and to those whom she judged fittest to counsel and comfort her and sympathize with her in her Temptations as having had Experience of the like or been oft consulted by them who had But her best Defence was to take to her self the whole Armour of God and her chief Refuge was to the Throne of Grace to appeal to God who comforteth them who are cast down and to wrestle with God for help in time of need whom she used to importune to teach her hands to war and her fingers to fight in her spiritual Warfare and to carry on the War at his own Charge because the Quarrel was his and managed against the grand Enemy of his Glory as much as of her Peace I shall transcribe a Paper which I find Endorsed thus In time of Temptation writ by me Elizabeth Walker O Most holy wise powerfull gratious faithfull unchangeable and eternal God I thy poor afflicted Creature tossed on Waves and Billows of Sin and Temptation fly unto thee for Refuge in this Storm begging of thee thy supporting Grace helping me against the Assaults of my spiritual Enemies by what wile soever they invade my Soul with abhorr'd impure Motions vile and detestable Suggestions which
through thy Grace I loath O blessed Lord and enter my solemn Protest against them Defiance and Detestation of them Good God I would not have an irreverent thought of thy sacred Being incomprehensible and most excellent Perfection and transcendent Glory which I would and do with my whole Heart Soul and all the Powers of my whole Man with all integrity acknowledge and subscribe to with mine own Hand to which O Lord I beg the Seal of thy Spirit as a Witness to my Soul that I am in Christ Jesus thy Child and Servant Elizabeth Walker Engaged I am O Lord by Covenant with thee in Baptism to fight thy Battels I beseech thee put on me that whole and compleat Armour that I may be able to resist my strong Enemies which war against my Soul and fight against thee Blessed Lord I desire to prostrate my self at thy Feet in the deepest sense of my own Unworthiness that thou shouldest look upon and help such a Miscreant and forlorn Sinner But for his sake that never sinned I beseech thee support me with thy compassionate Mercy to me a loathsome and defiled Sinner and give me not over to spiritual Judgments hardness of Heart blindness of Mind Impenitency an evil Heart of Unbelief departing from thee Give me not up into the Hands of them that hate me and would work my Ruine I beseech thee do not chuse my Delusions leaving me to a deceivable Heart to which I dare not trust without the Guards of thy Holy Spirit Leave me not O God to my own strength in which I cannot doe the least good and without thine shall fall into the greatest evils of Soul and Body and sink to the bottom of the bottomless Pit of Sin and eternal Misery from which O God I beseech thee let thy unfathomed Mercy in Christ Jesus speedily prevent me and give a mortal stab to all my Corruptions by what Course soever thou wilt take with me only let me fall into thy Compassionate Hands Good Lord bind up my Wounds and heal my Putrifying Soars I beseech thee forsake me not in the time of my older Age when Strength faileth and suffer not the defects of my Body to become the Sin of my Soul I beseech thee suffer no Tryal to be above my Strength but Blessed Lord thou that hast suffered being Tempted make a way for me that I may be able to bear it I beseech thee lay that Hand on me thou tookest hold on Peter with that I may not sink in the deep Waters in which there is no standing Good Lord suffer no Weapon formed against me to Prosper but bring me up out of my Astonishments and Confusions of Soul though the Enemy break in like a Flood let thy Holy Spirit in my Heart lift up a Standard against him Good Lord take a full Possession of my Soul and suffer no Rival with thee let me be guided governed and acted by thee Good Lord let no Sin have Dominion over me I beseech thee fill my Heart and Soul with the Graces of thy Blessed Spirit Deep Reverentialness of thee much Love Fervour and Zeal for thy Glory which I beseech thee cause to be ever very and exceeding dear and precious to me and suffer not the Envenomed Arrows of my Enemy to stick on me but I beseech thee quench all those Fiery Darts the Poison of them drinketh up my Spirits Good Lord apply to my Soul that healing Balsam made of the Blood of the Son of God and with an Indelible Character let thy Law be written on my Heart O Blessed God Father Saviour Sanctifier I beseech thee make this the transcript of my Soul in an Holy Life in Submission and Obedience to thee in all things with all possible Adoration Thanksgiving and Praise unto thee O Lord most due in Heaven and on Earth to which I say Amen Amen Amen She Read also all the good Books with intentest Diligence she could enquire out or be informed of on this Subject and wept Buckets of Tears to quench those Fiery Darts which though she had an Excellent Eye brought her many Years since to the use of Spectacles and caused her oft to use the Psalmist's Expression My Eye is Consumed because of Grief and waxeth Old because of my Enemy And would often Pray that her Bodily-Infirmities might not be her Souls Dis-advantages and say That though they were not her Sins they were the Effects of them Thus was her Life a continual Warfare in which she fought the good Fight of Faith and was more than Conqueror through him that loved her and helped her and I am comfortably upon good Grounds persuaded hath received a glorious Crown of Righteousness from him whose Appearance she so heartily Loved and so constantly and earnestly waited for Her Warfare is accomplished and she rests from these and all her Labours and as she overcame in his Strength who taught her Hands to War and Fingers to Fight and covered her Head in the Day of Battel so to him be all the Glory and Eternal Praises Amen Amen SECT XVIII Friends she used to Pray for I Subjoyn to the Precedent an Account of another Paper which as the last abovenamed I found in a distinct Sheet with this Title A Catalogue of Christian Friends whom I desire in a peculiar manner to present in my poor Prayers to God at the Throne of his Grace and that God would doe for them for Soul and Body above what I can ask Then follows this Prayer GRacious God thou hast commanded to Pray for all Men but especially for the Houshold of Faith Lord thou never saidst Seek my Face in vain but hast with great Condescention and Encouragement Invited thy People to make their Addresses to thee for themselves and others And hast joyned with the Command thy Promise to hear and grant agreeable to thy Will what is best for us Lord thou givest Liberally and dost not upbraid and wilt not send thy People away Empty seeing thou always hast it plentifully by thee I come unto thee in the Name and for the Sake and alone Righteousness Merits and Mediation of thy Son and my alone Saviour Jesus Christ in the behalf of my Self and Christian Friends Lord I beg of thee for thy Church and peculiar People and by name present before thee some known to me my Christian Friends them and their Joynt-Relations Good Lord shower down on them the Blessings of Prayer Gracious God I do beseech thee extend thy choicest Favours to my most near Relations my Dear Husband my Dear Grandson his Father and his Relations with my other near Relations Good Lord be very gracious to our Neighbouring Ministry Mr. Alchorne Mr. Hublon Mr. Loe Mr. Arrowsmith Doctor Fuller Mr. Siday with the rest Lord give them the Plentifull Encrease of their Labours the ingrafting many Souls into thy Kingdom And be very gracious to those who have known my Soul in Adversity and have been earnest Petitioners in my behalf at thy Throne of
Introduction pag. 3 SECT I. Of her Birth and Parentage pag. 5 An Account of her Book out of which most is transcribed concerning our selves and Children Time and Place of her Birth pag. 9 Her Parents Her Father 's early Prudence and a strange over-ruling Providence which brought him to be a Citizen which was the spring and occasion of many consequent Mercies to her and others pag. 10 The tenderness of her Spirit when a Child pag. 13 A great fault she was guilty of when young which was turned to her benefit in future Caution pag. 14 Her Father 's great Care of her and Confidence in her pag. 15 SECT II. How she was first awakened to a deep Sense of Religion by Temptation pag. 17 The first Onset by a blasphemous suggestion pag. 18 How she overcame the Temptation to Atheism pag. 19 Her long struggling with Temptation and the first glimpse of Comfort pag. 20 Kept half a Year by it without sleep or very little pag. 22 Means of her Recovery and some gradual Relief of which she hath an excellent Passage pag. 24 Yet she suffered renewed Onsets pag. 25 SECT III. Of our Marriage remarkable Passages concerning it pag. 27 SECT IV. Her Life in concise Epitome pag. 30 SECT V. How she spent a Day pag. 32 Rose constantly at Four of the Clock Spent two hours with God in secret An account of the rest till bed-time pag. 41 SECT VII For the number Six is omitted by the Printer How she spent a Week ibid. Her exact circumspection in sanctifying the Lord's Day Her whole method in it to Page 44 Monday Mornings Prayers for the Church of God which she constantly observed with great Zeal and Charity both for all the Foreign Churches and our own for many years ever after she had been informed of that commendable Custom set up in so many Families quite through the Nation ibid. Constantly spent Friday the Passion-day in Fasting and Prayer or if she foresaw Diversion unavoidable on that day chose one before it pag. 48 SECT VIII How she spent a Year Where are set down the Heads of the following Sections pag. 49 SECT IX Her Character as a Wife pag. 51 In time of Health to Page 55 In times of being Sick to Page 61 SECT X. Of her Lyings-in in Child-bearing ibid. SECT XI Of the Baptising our Children Her very commendable Practice on that occasion pag. 64 SECT XII Her Care of the Education of her Children pag. 66 to pag. 82 I give no touch at the Particulars of this long Section because I arnestly recommend the reading of the whole often over as being very Exemplary and usefull SECT XIII Of monthly Sacraments Her constant Communicating and serious Preparation pag. 82 SECT XIV Of her Writings pag. 84 SECT XV. Discreet management of her Family pag. 86 SECT XVI Visitations by Sickness on our selves or some of our Children pag. 92 to pag. 115 This is so large and hath so many exemplary passages of indefatigable Watchings fervent Prayers gratious Answers humble Submission to God that I leave them to the Reader 's own Observation SECT XVII Renewed Assaults of her Enemy by Temptation pag. 115 The usual Seasons of which were Indispositions of Mind by Sorrow or of Body by Sickness pag. 116 Her Methods of Resisting 1. Conference with Experienced Christians 2. Reading suitable Books 3. Entring her solemn protest against them under her hand in appeal to God which you find Page 119. with this Title In time of Temptation writ by me Elizabeth Walker followed with a most devout pathetick Prayer SECT XVIII Friends she used to pray for by name and the form of Prayer in which pag. 123 I name those in the Body of the Prayer but omit to name them in the Margin above Thirty Heads of Families not being set down in order according to their Qualities SECT XIX Some trying Calamities on the Nation on Friends or Family and signal Deliverance from Dangers pag. 126 The great Plague and the number that died ibid. The Fire the number of Churches and Houses burnt pag. 127 Other Afflictions on particular Friends pag. 12â— On our selves pag. 129 to pag. 13â— SECT XX. Of our going to Tunbridge-Wells ibid My reasons of writing on it How she made that placâ— of Divertisment and Hurry a place of Retirement anâ— Vacancy to Devotion to pag. 14â— SECT XXI Of keeping our Wedding-day and Enteâ—tainment of our Friends ibid SECT XXII Of the Marriage of our only Daughter and her Death in Child-birth the same Year yet leaving a Son pag. 148. 'T is no wonder she wrote so much of heâ— own who used not to pass by what concerned others 〈◊〉 the Lady Mary Rich and the Lady Essex Rich theâ—â— Marriages with a devout Prayer for each pag. 149. Thâ—â— is a large Section most transcribed from her own Papers full of most excellent Devotion and humble Submission to God's smarty blow to pag. 161. And then 〈◊〉 most pathetick tenderness to the Dear Child pag. 16â— SECT XXIII Acts and Kinds of her great Charity ibid An account how it might be call'd her Charity though she were a Wife and great Charity by which shâ— gave though all she had to give were in truth but little I allowed her what my small Estate would afford all she gave of that was properly her own Charity and mine also in several respects might properly be called her's to pag. 171. She gave considerably more every Year out of her allowance than she spent upon herself She would buy Cloath from London by the whole piece to Clothe the Poor cause strong Linsey-woolsey to be made to give away imploy the Poor who wanted Work never buy any thing too cheap of the Poor People c. was bountifull to her poor Relations pag. 175 Yet never reproached her self or me by a sordid garb but secured her own decency with great Prudence while she relieved the Poor with great Charity pag. 176 Her Charity in Pains was next to that of her Purse in getting and using her skill in Physick and Chirurgery and Women labouring with Child pag. 180 Her forgiving Charity pag. 181 Her Moderation towards them who were not of the same Communion pag. 182 to pag. 185 SECT XXIV Of her care to promote God's Glory and the Salvation of Souls pag. 185 SECT XXV Several Graces in which she was most Eminent pag. 188. Knowledge Faith Charity Patience Sympathy with others pity to the Poor Repentance Reverential Fear of God Love Obedience Sincerity Modesty Courage Meekness Contentedness Thankfulness Tenderness of Conscience Improvement of Time Zeal Humility from pag. 188 to pag. 209 Her Sickness and Death pag. 210 The APPENDIX pag. 232 Directions to her Children concerning Prayer pag. 214 to pag. 223 Some Heads of Prayer formed according to those Directions pag. 224 Marks of a Regenerate Estate pag. 229 to pag. 233 A Consolatory Letter written to the Right Honourable Isabella Countess of Radnor upon the surprizing Death of her dearly-beloved Daughter the
yet more occurred in every one well worth observing To begin with the first day of the Week or the Lord's Day the Queen of days the first-born of all the Children of time in her esteem to which she accounted a double Portion to be due of religious observance and most raised Devotion and always paid it She was scrupulously sollicitous both of the Negative and Positive Duties she judged to be required on that day both to prevent the violation of that holy Rest and to sanctifie it I might subjoin a short Treatise of that Subject if I should collect and put together what I meet with from her own Pen concerning it in several places For the first as she gave it the full dimensions in early rising so she would not suffer it to be intrench'd upon by any works but of absolute Necessity and Mercy ordered things so that her Maids must never make a Cheese that day and would seldom use the Coach to carry her to Church except in extremity of way and weather and though none gave freer welcome on other days would forbear inviting any on that day to prevent diversions and if Friends sometimes came in would as soon as it was possible without uncivil rudeness withdraw into her Chamber After Dinner at which she especially eat sparingly on that day to prevent drowsiness at Church She constantly called all the Family together to hear them read the Scriptures and if any Neighbour were sick within such distance as would not hinder her timely attending publick Worship would not fail to visit them and all the day she practised her self what she oft advised others Isa 58.13 She turned away her foot from the Sabbath from doing her pleasure on God's Holy Day and called the Sabbath her delight the holy of the Lord honourable and honoured him not doing her own ways nor finding her own pleasure nor speaking her own words but delighted herself in the Lord and in his Service For the positive Duties Being early up she spent as much time in dressing her Soul to meet God and as little as was possible in adorning her Body to the Eyes of Men though always with a grave and decent neatness She always retained a profound Reverence for the Name and Presence of God so that she was always attentively devout at Prayers and Sermons to which she brought all her Servants with her that they might not stay loitering idly at home or by the way and her Eye and Example would awe the ruder youth into becoming Carriage for which end she would sometimes rise up and look about her with good effect After publick Worship finished she would retire for a considerable time to recollect and pray over the Sermons and after finishing what was her custom on other days to doe Besides the Servants reading every one a Chapter when my weariness would not allow me to repeat the Sermons she would desire my Curate to read some good Book and oft would she do it her self She read in the Family the Lord's Day the seven night before she died good part of Dr. Sherlock's Treatise of Death and I must say I remember not I ever heard Man or Woman exceed her in this kind I confess with shame I could not doe it so well for tho' she altered not a Syllable of the Author's words her Reading might be called a Reading and giving of the Sense for tho' she read quick she did it so smoothly and distinctly and would place the Emphasis upon some word in every Sentence so intelligently without any affected tone or vehement alteration of her Voice that the change was scarce perceptible not so much as betwixt what we call flat and sharp in Musick and yet would strangely facilitate the understanding of the Sense to low Capacities an infallible evidence of her clear understanding it herself After Family Prayer spending some little time more than on other nights in committing her self to God she went to Bed and adding to her usual Ejaculations Praises for the liberty of another Sabbath Prayers for acceptance of the days Services and pardon for the Iniquities of her holy things she went to rest and such were every Week's First-fruits On Monday Morning awaking with God and having blown off the Ashes which veil'd the Embers kindled by the ardent Fervour of the preceding days Devotions she kindled them into an holy Flame with which having offered up the daily Morning-Sacrifice she next brought her Peace-offerings for the whole House of Israel She had a very publick Spirit and enlarged Heart on which she always bore the concerns of Zion and preferred Jerusalem above her chief Joy She stretched out her craving hands over the World as you 'll find her express her self that the mighty God who calleth the Earth from the rising of the Sun to the going down thereof would shine out of Zion the perfection of Beauty that he would pity them who sit in darkness and the region and shadow of Death that he would destroy Satan's Kingdom and set free those who are in bondage to it that he would exalt the Kingdom of his dear Son till the little Stone cut out of the Mountain without Hands might become a great Mountain and fill the whole World and all the corners of it might see the Salvation of God that he would effectually call out of Babylon his captivated People that yet are detained in it that he would water abundantly with the fruitful Showers of his Grace all the Churches which his own Right-hand hath planted and that he with whom is plenty of Spirit would pour it out abundantly and furnish himself with fit Instruments to carry on the work of his own Glory and Salvation of Souls that he would give Pastors after his own Heart who might feed his People with Knowledge and Vnderstanding that they may be delivered from Ignorance Error Heresie and all Ungodliness that they may adorn the Gospel with such a Conversation as becomes it that all over whom the Name of Christ is called might depart from Iniquity Beseeching the Lord to pour out abundantly the true Spirit of the Gospel on all who made profession of it with all its Operations and Graces as a Spirit of Wisdom Knowledge and the Fear of God of Faith and Holiness Repentance and universal unreserved new Obedience especially as an healing Spirit of Unity and Peace mutual Forbearance true Christian Charity and Brotherly-Love and as a mighty Spirit of Grace and Supplication to obtain these Blessings for themselves and one another for the Churches of the neighbouring Nations round about by name that God would give them one Heart and one way that the nick-names of Lutherans and Calvinists might be forgotten and Ephraim and Judah might be one Stick in the Lord's Hand especially for the distressed Protestants of France that God would turn his Anger from them cause them to be pitied by their Brethren and effectually relieved that God would shew them why he contended with them help
that Nature indicated thereby what must relieve and rising up in my Bed I stretched out my left Arm and humbly committing my self and the Success to God said I would Bleed again The Physicians then consented and proceeded to the Operation and opening a Vein in my Left Arm the Blood sprang out so abundantly that they drew at least ten Ounces After the closing the Orifice being laid down again My Dearest Dear who had been all my Sickness my tenderest Nurse my wakefull Watcher and all yea more than could be wished or expected or possibly performed without a spring of so strong and endearing Affection to give and guide the Motion became my Chaplain if I may have leave to use such an Expression and before the Symptoms she hath mentioned arrived at their height kneeled down by my Bed-side and wrestled with God in Prayer with such spiritual Fervency and expressed herself so appositely so pertinently so suitably and with such holy Ardour poured out her Soul to God as I never knew exceeded if equalled by the ablest Christian or Minister in all my Life Surely if ever the promise of pouring out a Spirit of Grace and Supplication was signally made good it was then made good to her and the effects of it to me for as she was a true Daughter of Abraham an Israelitess indeed she rose from her Knees a Female Israel she prevailed with God I fell into so great a Sweat as was scarce ever known and though the Night was full of the Symptoms she names which so afflicted and affrighted her yet she retained her Presence of Mind to assist me with holiest Words and kindest Deeds In the Morning Symptoms abated and when Dr. Needham came and had felt my Pulse He told me he came directly from Dr. Willis who dyed that day at Eleven a Clock of my Disease but added with a Smile he would not have told me so but that my danger was past and said That under God my last night's Bleeding and Sweating saved my Life without which humanely speaking I could not have escaped blessed be God who put that Resolution into my Mind and heard her earnest Prayers Now to return to her Pious gratefull Words I desire to bless God for every Circumstance of his Mercy in my Dear Husband's Sickness The helps and love of Friends the use of Physick with other means the constant and frequent Visits of Neighbour-Ministers their Prayers for us and of many other Friends and good People in our behalf to which I ascribe a great share of indulgent Mercy in sparing to me a little longer my Dear Husband God did not cast out the Prayer of the Afflicted but in my Distress when I cryed unto him he graciously inclined his Ear unto me and helped me Good Lord enable me with my yet continued Mercy mutually to acknowledge thy Kindness and by an exemplary holy Life to declare thy great Goodness to us Building up each other in our most Holy Faith as Heirs together of the Grace of Life And this Mercy wherewith thou yet intrusts me Lord help me more to improve to my Spiritual Advantage and continue him to length of Days with the abundant Gifts and Graces of thy Holy Spirit a choice and signal Instrument of thy Glory I bless thee for thy supporting Mercy in my Relative Duty in my many sorrowfull Nights and Watchings that when my Sleep departed from me I still might make my Addresses to thee who never slumberest nor sleepest for thou always seest the afflictions of thy People and knowest their Sorrows and wilt not despise them that seek thee thou hast restored Comfort to me and to my Mourners praised be thy Mercy 'T is hard to pass-by her tenderness to me of so recent Date as my last Year's Visitation which held me so many Months and brought me so low and at length settled in my Right-hand with such swelling and lameness as took away its use and under God I owe the recovery of it to her Skill and Pains and Kindness by her frequent bathing fomenting and annointing of it and preparing other both inward and outward Medicines so far to use my Pen to pay this small tribute to her happy Memory SECT X. Of her Lyings-Inn in Child-bearing GOD was pleased to give her strength to go out her full time of eleven Children six Sons and five Daughters besides some abortive or untimely Births And if ever Children were Baptized in their Mothers Belly excuse the Expression doubtless hers were so I mean solemnly Consecrated to God with fervent frequent Prayers and wash'd in a Jordan of her Tears who bore them as truly in her Heart as Womb. I find all their Births recorded with most savory and devout Reflections tho' some with more Enlargement as attended with more signal Circumstances I might transcribe them all that the sweet Spirit of Praise which breaths so fragrantly in every of them might kindle and excite the like Temper in others no Incense being more gratefull to the Nostrils of that God who saith He that offereth Praise glorifieth me but I must contract The twelfth of July 1651 God mercifully Deliver'd me of my first Child In 1652 I being big with-Child had an high Fever and was after a great and very hot fit delivered of a Daughter Aug. 29. Being Lord's Day between four and five in the Morning my Fever turned to an Ague and held me ten Weeks and brought me very low yet God in his Mercy graciously spared me and restored my Health I bless him for it Feb. 5. 54. God delivered me of a third Child our first Son God gave me a fourth Deliverance of a Daughter still-born Dec. 23. 55. I went my full time and might have been ever big Blessed be God that spared his unworthy Creature God gave me a gracious Deliverance of a fifth a Son May 15. 57. God gave me a Mercifull Deliverance of a sixth Child a Daughter June 8. 58. After a long and hard Labour continued three days and three nights in great Extremity all about me despairing of Life God mercifully Delivered me of a seventh Child a Son October 22. 59. which Mercy much affected my Dear Husband and for which my Deliverance I most humbly Bless God I confess I never knew to what degree I loved her till that time and never experienced such Raptures of Joy and Thankfullness for any worldly Matter as on that occasion the Impression of which was so deep that the remembrance of it hath a pleasing relish even to this Day God gave me a gracious Deliverance of an eighth Child a Son still-born after an hard Labour December the 11. 1660. In this Lying-in I fell into Melancholy which much disturbed me with Vapours and was very ill It pleased God to suffer my old Enemy very impetuously to assault me c. But more of this when I touch the return of her Temptation God gave me Deliverance of a ninth Child a Son October 9. 1662. God graciously gave me a
Husband but she that maketh ashamed is as Rottenness to his Bones Prov. 31.17 She looketh well to the ways of her Houshold and cateth not the Bread of Idleness She stretcheth forth her Hands to the Poor yea she reacheth forth her Hands to the needy She riseth also while it is yet Night and giveth Meat to her Houshold Col. 3.18 Wives Submit your selves to your own Husbands as is fit in the Lord. Eph. 5.22 Wives submit your selves unto your own Husbands as unto the Lord and the Wife see that she Reverence her Husband 1 Pet. 3.1 6. and ver 3 4 Likewise ye Wives be in Subjection to your own Husbands even as Sarah obeyed Abraham calling him Lord. Let not your adorning be platting of the Hair wearing of Gold or putting on of Apparel But let it be the hidden Man of the Heart in that which is not corruptible even the Ornament of a meek and quiet Spirit which in the Sight of God is of great Price Good Lord grant me this with all the other Graces of thy Holy Spirit Amen Amen Amen This last named Scripture was the Glass which she always drest herself by with exemplary modest Decency as became a grave and holy Matron and a Minister's Wife as she would often urge as one reason of the plainness of her garb which was never sordid or negligent though always in Black never appeared abroad in any other Colour so much as to a Knot or Ribbon I with great Thankfulness acknowledge she was my Crown and Glory and thâ— Heart of her Husband did safely trust in her The fourth Head which she Collected out oâ— the Scriptures for her Childrens use is Thâ— Threatnings in God's Word he hath denounc'â— against Sinners to keep your Hearts in aâ— awfull Fear that you neglect not God remembring that as he has and was so he stiâ—â— is and will be Just in the Punishment of thâ— Breach of his most Holy and Righteous Commands in observing of which there is greâ—â— Rewards If his Wrath be kindled but a little who can abide it but who knows the Power oâ— it How then shall we be able to dwell witâ— Everlasting Burnings and devouring Fire Stand in Awe therefore and Sin not Then follow no less than forty nine Pageâ— closely written of God's severe Threatningâ— against Sin and Sinners in general and the particular kinds of Sin all exactly cited as to thâ— Book Chapter and Verse Oh how richly diâ— the Word of God dwell in her How did shâ— Meditate in it Day and Night That she coulâ— so readily turn to almost any place only by heâ— own Memory and Observation for she woulâ— sometimes though seldom come to me intâ— my Study and say Pray My Dear tell me wherâ— are such Words repeating them for I know noâ— how to find them by a Concordance never having used one The fifth Head The Promises for the Pardon of Sin the faithful Sayings of God worthy of all Acceptation Jesus Christ came into the World to Save Sinners yea the chief of Sinners in him all the Promises are yea and in him Amen Then she begins with Gen. 3.15 He shall â—ruise thy Head a very comfortable Word to â—er who had so many Conflicts with the Old â—erpent her Enemy as she always called him Then follows a choice Collection in ten Pages which she concludes with Rom. 10. For the â—cripture saith Whosoever believeth in him shall â—ot be ashamed The Sixth Head The Promises to Perseverance in Grace God which begins a good Work in the Hearts of his People will perfect it for he works all our Works in us and for us and to him be the Glory who is the Author and Finisher for we are kept by the Power of God through Faith unto Salvation Then follow twenty nine Pages of such Promises The seventh Head The Promises in Affliction for Support and Comfort God doth not willingly grieve the Children of Men there has no Temptation overtaken you but such as is common But God in his Faithfulness will not suffer it to be above Strength but will with the Temptation also make a way to escape for he knows our Frame whereof we are made and will not contend for Ever Then folloâ— twenty one Pages of these Promises upoâ— Habak 1.12 Art not thou from Everlasting O Lord my God my Holy one we shall not dyâ— She adds Blessed be God for these Words anâ— all his blessed Promises for which a Reasoâ— will appear afterwards when she shews whaâ— support they yielded her in an hour of Temptation in the close she directs her Words 〈◊〉 her Children for whose use chiefly she haâ— taken this Pains Having these great and precious Promiseâ— cleanse your selves from all filthiness of Flesh anâ— Spirit perfecting Holiness in the Fear of God For Godliness hath the Promises of this Lifâ— and of the Life to come therefore seek first tâ—â— Kingdom of Heaven and its Righteousnesâ— and all these things shall be added unto you Theâ— concludes thus I intend not by this Collection of Promiseâ— and Threatnings transcrib'd out of Scripture 〈◊〉 take you off from the Historical and preceptâ—ry part of God's word to which as nothing 〈◊〉 to be added so nothing is to be diminish'd froâ— it but only to get Wine and Oil near-hand these precious Cordials not far off when mosâ— need of them therefore I request and chargâ— your Conscientious Reading all the Truths oâ— God revealed in your Bible the Holy Scriptures The eighth Head An abbreviation of Faith and Christian Principles which saith she I have collected out of divers Authors with some things of my own conceptions as God helped my understanding This contains eleven Pages and is a very judicious and usefull and methodicall discourse but because she distinguisheth not between what was her own and what she collected from others I transcribe nothing out of it She concludes it thus These Truths I do with the best of my judgment assent to and beseech God to establish my heart in the firm belief of his Word Good Lord let my Faith be sound and saving also The ninth Head I may call a Body of Divinity which she gives no intimation whether it were collected from others or of her own Composure as she did in what went before and therefore I have reason to think it was her own It begins with a description of God as to his Essence Persons and Attributes then proceeds to his works of Creation and Providence c. and proves by apposite Scriptures all she sets down 'T is very methodical and clear in 44 Pages If I have any judgment an able Divine need not be ashamed to own it and I think it would be no reproach to wish That all could exceed it When she hath spoken of Death and the Resurrection she adds Good Lord fit me for a dying hour Bring me to it In thy infinite Mercy be with me in it and carry me through it And after three Pages in which she describes
sometimes two by the Glass She would be attentive at the reading the Scriptures in the Family and ask her Sister the meaning of some Passages she understood not She would constantly goe alone to Prayer She told one of the Maids the Devil tempted her to Play at Prayers but she had pray'd against him and that he did not trouble her so much since She desired one of her Sisters to grant her a Request and said that she must not deny her Which was Not to refuse any good Counsel when ever it was given her but to accept of it from whom soever it came Another time being with her Sisters as they sate at Work she told them all those things would be dirt in Heaven And it most concerned them to get their Sins Pardoned and an Interest in Jesus Christ Discoursing of the Vanity of this World and Happiness of being Good and fit for Heaven As she had opportunity she would frequently be giving good Counsel with much Sweetness and Gravity If she were ill she would strive to hide it for fear of Grief to her Father and my self saying when we ask'd her how she did Pretty well I thank God Four Days before she died when the Maid went to help her up in the Morning she told her she was very Sick but God would doe her good by that Sickness and she should love him the better for it In this last and short sickness she had very serious apprehensions of Death Said she should die but was not afraid of Death And desired she might die quietly and without disturbance The Physician desiring to give her a little Wine ask'd her if she loved Sack she answered No. He desired her to take a little She said she would if he pleased but she did not love it to fuddle with A few hours before she died she desired to go to Bed out of which she had been taken by reason of the Flegm that troubled her and I being unwilling she said she would now go to Bed for adieu and for all Where she fell a sleep in Jesus enfolded in the Arms of Everlasting Mercies She resigned up her Soul with these and the like Expressions Lord let me come to thee my Lord and my God And Lord Jesus receive my Spirit I acknowledge the Words were given her but she readily received them and oft repeated though she could not speak but with difficulty she had been so affable and winning to all Rich and Poor that many shed more Tears for her than at the departure of their own Children she was much desired in Life and of all who knew her much lamented at Death How partial soever this Relation may seem to any and as from bribed Affection yet I assert the Truth to God's Goodness who hath ordained Praises in the Mouths of Babes and Sucklings and hath I humbly hope now perfected the same in the Consummation of her Eternal Bliss in the Fruition of himself to his Everlasting Praises I have hitherto in this Account left out many remarkable Passages for Brevity let me obtain liberty to transcribe the rest of the Paragraph verbatim word for word as her Pen left it Lord I bless thee that of Eleven for whom I Praise thee thou hast yet spared me two I beseech thee if it may consist with thy good Pleasure continue them in this World keeping them from the Evil of it to a good Old-Age choice Instruments of thy Glory God Lord Sanctifie them with thy Grace and holy-Holy-Spirit and with an Indelible Character and Inscription stamp thy own Image on them that they may be thine by Grace and Adoption Lord be thou their God and Portion I beseech thee put them not off with any thing less than thy self Good Lord I beg that thou wilt take a through and full Possession of their Souls and give them to retrieve my Errors by a more early knowing serving and loving of thee and punish none of mine Iniquities with their Sins but keep them blameless to thy Everlasting Kingdom and bind up their Souls in the bundle of Eternal Life Amen Amen January 23. 1669. Was a day of Mercy to me in the midst of my Affliction being Lord's Day my sweet Mary lying then Dead with us in the House the extremity of my Affection forced me into the Chamber where she then lay a cold piece of Clay I there poured out my Soul to God in Prayer and from thence returned into to the Chamber of my signal Mercies I have received from God who comforteth those who are cast down Though he denied my vehement Desires and wrestlings with him in the time of her Sickness for her longer continuance with me in this World the Lord abundantly made up and compensated my Loss I took my Bible and my Intention was to Read in the New-Testament to allay my own Grief with the dolorous Sufferings of my Saviour but my Bible suddenly fell open in my Lap and my Eye presently fixed upon Habbak 1.12 which was powerfully set home upon my Heart with great Comfort and Refreshment with full Measure running over streams of Mercy and Loving Kindness yeaâ— of tenderest Mercies flowing into my Soul an Eternal God in exchange of a transient Comfort The Lord tendered me himself who is from Everlasting with this Propriety the Lord my God opposing his all-sufficient Righteousness against all my Unrighteousness My Holy One I should not Dye but Live Lord how hast thou silenced my inordinate Passions and Affections in superabundantly out-bidding all Creature-Comforts and Relations I beseech thee enable me so to live here that I may ever live with thee where I shall sin no more and Grief Sorrow and Sighing shall flee away The same Lord's Day in the Afternoon my Daughter Elizabeth whom God gave me June 8. 1658. to our great Satisfaction and Comfort suddenly broke out into a Flood of Tears and most Pathetical Vehement Desires after God and his Grace with Confession and bewailing of her Sins with such sensible and suitable Expressions as shewed it came from her very Soul which drew plenty of Tears of Love and Admiration from us all O my God how shall I love thee how shall I Praise thee for this Grace which I trust was the Work of thy Blessed Spirit Good Lord confirm and establish the Thoughts of her Heart before thee for Ever This day was a Tragi-Comedy if I may so speak Bitterness turn'd into surprizing Sweetness Weeping had continued for a Night but Joy came in before the succeeding Morning even Joy unspeakable and full of Glory I never remembred my Dear under such transports of Spiritual Peace and Satisfaction as from the Consolations of God from the Manifestations of his Love which flowed into her Soul from that Scripture above-named and I may truly say the Impressions of it never wore wholly off but even at many Years distance the naming of those Words would renew the Spiritual Relish she tasted in them and the briny Tears for the natural
her God was pleased to give her much Honour and Esteem in this World with which she retained a lowly Mind with much sweet obliging Kindness to all acquainted with her She was very Friendly to the meaner sort very kind and charitable to poor People to whom she had a very compassionate Heart and bountifull Hand in relieving of them which she did with great Privacy though God hath been pleased since her Death to make it known by them in their Acknowledgments and bewailing their loss of her I bless God she lived very desirable and dyed much lamented she was a very loving dutifull Child to her Parents a very endearing Wife to her Husband and very sweet in all her Relations she was very acceptable to all her Husband's Kindred by whom the loss of her was much bewailed God was pleased to make her married condition very Satisfactory to herself and all concerned and though God was pleased to conclude it in so short a time taking her out of this Life scarce eleven Months from her Marriage which was accompanied with great Joy and Kindness of Friends yet God filled it with the close crouded manifestations of his Love and Favour to her yea her whole Life from her Cradle to her Grave to which she went with much Decency and Honour and which is much more valuable unblemished free from the gross defilements of this World The Lord was pleased to fit her for himself by a tender crazy Constitution of Body she was much afflicted with Head-Ach and other Illness which she bore with much quietness and submission under God's Hand by which he led her to the consideration of a better Life About four Years of Age on days of Prayer and Fasting she would sit by me the whole Day and at Prayer hold up her little Hands which in her riper Age with continuance from her Childhood she performed more understandingly She was constant in Religious Duties conversant in God's Word the Holy Bible which whilst she was a Child she oft read through and got much Scripture by Heart Also read many good Authors several good Books her Dear Father or my self commended to her which Practice she did not decline neither before nor since her Marriage She constantly at least twice a Day made her Addresses to the Throne of Grace in Prayer When she was very young she would give an account of a Sermon and repeat most of the Particulars or Heads of it and as she was religiously habituated from her Childhood I do humbly hope God confirmed her by his Grace to Perseverance in the Ways of God She would excite others not only in her own Practice but by her Counsels as to their Souls Concerns Amongst other her good Advices as her Dear Husband since her Death hath informed me she said to him ' That she did not question but he Prayed alone before he had her and said so did she and desired him to continue the same that one Prayer might not be lost by their Joint-Prayer which they used once a day going together alone to seek God besides publick and Family-Worship They oft said that nothing should more oblige them to each other than their mutual Love to each others Souls in their helping one another in their way to Heaven I bless God for his signal kindness to her in him so near and dear to her not only making them one Flesh but one Soul and both one Spirit in himself In the time of her Travail and following Sickness she was very Meek and Patient as in all her former Sicknesses and Pain The Disease took her Head which deprived her of her Understanding but I bless God that so guarded her Tongue that she did not dishonour him The Lord was pleased to give her some little relaxation of her Disease in which Intervals she exprest her self Piously And desired of her Relations the carefull and good Education of her Child said she had oft begged of God in the behalf of her Relations by Marriage and for those who were not disposed of that God would fix them so as might be their best advantage both for Soul and Body and desired there might continue a Loving Respect between both Families which I do beseech God to preserve Her Disease did not give her leave to express herself as otherwise she might have done much more to God's Glory and the Comfort of her Friends But Blessed be God for his Grace bestowed on her that her Evidences for her Eternal Happiness were not to seek upon her Dying-Bed but were in the safe Hand of our Saviour and sealed with the Signet of God's Right-hand with an indelible Character and Inscription of God's Holy Image and Law on her Heart by his Holy Spirit as a Title to those Eternal Mansions of Glory purchased for her with the precious Blood of her dear Redeemer Jesus Christ in which Blessed Estate I humbly hope she is in the Everlasting Fruition and Enjoyment of God his Elect Angels and those Blessed Spirits of the Just made perfect Her Flesh also shall rest in hope of a glorious Resurrection when Mortality shall be swallowed up of Immortality God will joyn Soul and Body in an indissoluble Union with himself in that abundant Entrance into the Everlasting Kingdom of our Lord Jesus Christ so shall she be for ever with her Lord in thy Eternal Praises In which Persuasion good Lord quiet my Heart that I may acquiesce in thy unerring Wisdom Good Lord scatter the Foggs and Mists of my unruly Passions that hinder the sight and view of thy reconciled Face and Favour to me I beseech thee Pardon my Sins and Offences which have provoked thee to this manifestation of thy displeasure against us bereaving us of our Children that of eleven none remains and of this the loss more grievous than any of the rest though they with her through thy Kindness very desirable to us but she our last one and all Lord shouldst thou take my Forfeitures how destitute should I be not only of Children but of all thy sustaining Mercies and above all in the irreparable loss of thy self who art abundantly better to me than Sons and Daughters Good Lord sanctifie to me this Dispensation and help me to find out the accursed thing which provoked thee to smite with so heavy a Blow I beseech thee with this correcting Hand beat off the busie Flies of Sin and Temptation that they may not corrupt my Soul Good Lord cleanse me from all filthiness of Flesh and Spirit that I may perfect Holiness in thy Fear run with Patience the Race thou hast yet set before me finish my Course in thy Service and conclude my Life in this World to thy Glory in the Salvation of my Soul for Christ's Sake Lord as for my self I beg of thee to be very Gracious to those related to us by the Marriage of our Dear Child though thou hast loosed the Knot that so nearly joyned our Families I beseech thee do not untie those
and Songs of Thanksgivings who did so anticipate that State and Work whilst here below She hath left sixteen whole Pages of one form of Thanksgiving which she begins thus Lord what shall I render to thee for all thy unspeakable Benefits in thy Mercies to me I beseech thee in the remembrance of them let thy Holy Spirit excite and stir up in my Heart a thankfull Acknowledgment Lord I bless thee for thy self in whom all Perfection is Eternal and Unchangeable an Everliving and Immortal God filled with all adorable Excellency the Author and Original of all things the first Principle of all good who art most amiable to an Intellectual Eye most adequate and proportionable most suitable to Immortal Beings Thou Lord art the Felicity and Bliss of Souls c. And so she proceeds sixteen whole Pages without any vain Tautologies only beginning the several Paragraphs with Lord I bless thee or the like this is written the most curiously of any thing I yet have found of hers and continues to the End with most raised Fervours of Holy Praises I can scarce forbear to say with flowing streams of sweet and Pious Eloquence I will venture my Reader 's Candour to excuse my adding the last Lines I bless thee for the hopes I have of a glorious Resurrection when thou wilt be glorified in thy Saints thou wilt say to the North give up and to the South keep not back that thy Sons may be brought from far and thy Daughters from the ends of the Earth and all as Faithfull Depositories shall restore to thee at that universal Jubilee then shall my Dust arise and Praise thee I bless thee for thy Kingdom afree Donation and Inheritance of thy Saints there shall be no pricking Briar or grieving Thorn when I shall neither fin nor sorrow any more but for ever be in the Exaltation of Eternal Bliss where thy Angels Cherubims and Seraphims adore and worship thee with the highest fervour of Zeal and Love and where my Soul shall shine in its full Strength in thy Everlasting Praises Amen Amen Amen And there is not one Line less warm and savoury in all the other than are this Beginning and Conclusion of it The time would fail me to recount and reckon up all the other Graces in which she was Eminent and to blazon their Lustre and reflect their Brightness The tenderness of her Conscience which was very remarkable as I could Evidence in many Particulars this Pulse of her Soul beat very quick but withall was very even and uniform she used not to strain at Gnats and swallow Cammels Her Rule was in dubious Cases always to chuse the safest to the best of her Judgment not to consult with Flesh and Blood and be swayed by the Advice they suggested to do nothing rashly but with due and prudent Deliberation She was affraid of Sin as Sin and therefore of all Sin and would abstain from all appearance of Evil. Though she was not such a Stoick as to esteem all Sins equal yet she esteemed none in it self little because there is no little God to sin against no little Law to be despised no little Heaven to be lost no little Hell to be endured But an Almighty God a Royal Law an Heaven of unconceivable Glory and an Hell of endless and easeless Torments were concerned in all and it renders the least Sin in its own Nature a very great one to venture on it boldly against the light and dictates of Conscience Her Care to improve that Inch of precious Time on which so vast an Eternity depends was very signal She squandered not an Hour scarce suffered a Moment to run waste she used she knew no Games nor needed other to relax or recreate her Spirits but vicissitude and variety of commendable Imployment the change of Business sufficiently relieved her when she was weary of one she counted it a Refreshment to set upon another As a Traveller who sometimes Rides and sometimes Walks but still proceeds continues his Journey changes his Posture but not his Design and few ever made Religion their Business more intently and with fewer Interruptions Her publick Spiritedness should not be forgotten the concerns of the Nation especially of the Church lay very near her Heart She preferred Jerusalem before her chief Joy I will wrap up this Section with two which were diffused and spread over all the rest Her Zeal and her Humility Zeal is not so properly a distinct peculiar Grace as the Cream and Flower of them all the Oil which swims upon the waters of the Sanctuary the Varnish which both preserves them from fading and gives a shining advantageous Lustre to all the Colours with which the lively Picture of the new Creature is drawn not a distinct piece of the Divine Armour but the Edge and Keenness the Furbishing and Brightness both of offensive and defensive Arms. Her Zeal was very vigorous and lively she knew not what it was to be dull and sluggish Whatever her Hand found to do she did it with all her Might and Nature which too often is the remora of Grace in her was a nimble and useful Hand-maid to it She had an agile active Body Spare and Lean feared to be Fat saying She hated to be clogged with a foggy bulk of Flesh and of a vivacious sprightly Soul and these streams being in the right Channel Whafted her as Wind and Tide to her desired Port and Harbour that she was never becalmed or Wind-bound but Sailed amain and kept on her Course with swiftest Expedition till she had finished it with Safety and with Joy not that I ascribe it solely or chiefly to these but principally to the Divine Gales of the Holy Spirit of God so freely and plenteously vouchsafed to her that Wind which Bloweth where it listeth And for ever Blessed be his Goodness which so often filled her Sails Lastly She was cloathed with Humility as the Apostle counsels this I might call her Dust-gown for the aptness of the Allusion but it hung not so loose about her but was girded on with the Girdle of Truth about her Loins she wore it constantly no dress was more becoming herself or others in her Account she studied to bring it into Fashion by her Example and Advice she bought several of Mr. W. A's Treatises of that Subject to give to Friends those who received them will attest it and I hinted before she had made preparations to write a Tractate of it Amongst other things she had to say of it she had prepared this Encomium That it is the Foundation that gives Stability the Strength which gives Security the Ornament that reflects Beauty and the Completion which gives the finishing stroaks to all other Graces I shall not after all this need to draw her Character distinctly if I do any thing in that it shall be added in the close of all I am now arrived at my Mournfull Heavy Loss and her much waited for and desired Gain and great
unwritten Paper which remains may seem to imply she designed more This is just the fortyeth part of what she had written for her Childrens use being 6 Pages in her Book of Twelve score so that I have enough if I would enlarge to tire my self and satisfie not to say clog my Readers But I will consult my own ease and theirs in adding little more of what an account is given Sect. 12. under Eleven or Twelve distinct Heads I confess I am tempted to add the Example to the Rule I mean the large Form of Prayer and Thanksgiving each containing 16 Pages But I 'll forbear only as I toucht a few Lines of the beginning and end of the Thanksgiving before So I shall give a little taste of this Prayer which she begins thus Good Lord give me to know thee who passest all Knowledge and though I cannot comprehend thee in the perfection and fullness of thy Glory yet vouchsafe to give me to apprehend thee in thy Love and pardoning Mercy to me a poor miserable Sinner who in my first Being was invested with an happy and righteous Estate from which O Lord in my first Original I soon declined c. And so proceeds most humbly to acknowledge the guilt and pollution of Original Sin as I think yea know most Orthodoxly If our Bibles our Articles our Homilies yea our Liturgy be more Orthodox than Socinus and those Ephramites who lisp his Sibboleth because they cannot or will not pronounce aright the Shibboleth of the Church of England's good old Doctrine Then she proceeds to a large Confession of actual Sin both of Omission and Commission against both Tables Acknowledging the demerit of them proceeds to sue out the Pardon of them in these words O God thou knowest my foolishness and my Sins are not hid from thee I beseech thee pardon my Iniquities and blot out my Transgressions though they be as a thick Cloud Good Lord wash me from my Impurities in that Fountain set open for Sin and for Vncleanness the precious Blood of Jesus Christ which is not only able to expiate my guilt but to cleanse me from all my filthiness that through his stripes I may be healed and cleansed from all my Original and Actual Defilements c. Having enlarged upon this she proceeds to pay for Sanctification and Inherent Righteousness that she may be a new Creature in Christ Jesus then most fully and earnestly against Temptation then for the Assistance of the Spirit to render all God's Ordinances and the means of Grace effectual then for growth in Grace for Comfort for an Heavenly frame of Heart and Life for assurance and manifestation of God's Love to her then for Wisdom to consider her latter End and to be helped in that Spiritual Arithmetick so to number her Days as to apply her Heart to true Wisdom then that God would fit and prepare her for her Dissolution that when her days shall be consummated on Earth her Corruptible may put on Incorruption and her Mortal put on Immortality Then she concludes with these Words Then shall Death my last Enemy be vanquished and swallowed up in Victory and from thy unworthy Creature Everlasting Praises shall be rendred unto thee through Jesus Christ that giveth me the Victory for thou hast redeemed my Soul from the Power of the Grave I beseech thee receive me into thy Eternal Kingdom and Glory that neither Death nor Life things present nor things to come may be able to separate me from thy Love O God which is in Christ Jesus my Lord. Then she proceeds to Pray for the Church of which a taste was given in her Monday-morning Prayers Sect. 7. pag. 45. Gracious Lord the Mercies I ask of thee for my own Soul I earnestly beg of thee for thy Church and People Blessed Lord Thou hast made the Earth by thy Power established the World by thy Wisdom and stretched out the Heavens by thy Discretion thy Arm is not shortned that thou canst not Save Good Lord take care of Zion build up the Walls of Jerusalem that in Zion there may be Deliverance and Holiness in thy House let the Mountain of thy House be established in the top of the Mountains be thou a Wall of Fire round about and her Glory in the midst thereof But I forgot my self 't is hard to stop my Pen. Then I beseech thee especially for the Land of my Nativity the Nation of which I am a sinfull Member here is a large Paragraph The next is for the World Give thy Gospel a free and glorious Passage through the World Good Lord pity those that sit in the region and shaddow of Death Then I beseech thee be mercifull to all the Sons and Daughters of Sorrow and Affliction the Disconsolate the Sick those who contend with Poverty Imprisonment Reproach Disgrace Then for them who suffer Persecution for the Truth Then for her Relations I confess I am almost ashamed that I have thus mangled so excellent a Prayer so Piously so Judiciously in such suitable Scripture Phrase and Language I think it had been better to have transcribed the whole or let it quite alone but her Friends may command a Copy of it if they please Having finished her Intercessions for others she returns to conclude with renewed Petitions for herself which I will venture to set down Good Lord be the God and Portion of me thy unworthy Creature and of those so dear unto me give me a Relation to thee an Affiance in thee and a Dependance upon thee that in all my concerns I may come to thee in whom are all my fresh Springs the riches of free Grace to poor Sinners and treasuries of Mercies purchased with the Precious Blood of Jesus Christ I beseech thee with-hold not thy tender Mercies from me but give me of that hidden Manna the sweet refreshing Incomes of thy Holy Spirit into my Soul and when my Heart is overwhelmed I beseech thee lead me to the Rock that is higher than I for thou hast been a shelter to me Lord be thou a strong Tower to me to which I may continually resort for whom have I in Heaven but thee And if I know any thing of my own Heart there is none comparative on Earth that I desire besides thee thou art my God besides thee there is no Saviour I beseech thee guide me with thy Counsel and when I shall go hence and be no more in this World I beseech thee receive me into thy Glory Then follows the Thanksgiving full as large as the Form of Prayer and if it may be more Spiritual raised and Divinely Savoury but I will not repeat the Errour to mangle it and set down so Imperfect Pieces and spoil its Beauty but signifie to her Friends that I shall freely allow them to read the Original which is fairly legible or if they think it worth the while to Copy it out or at more leisure to Print some few Copies of it and others of her usefull
Sheep and his Lambs You have put your hand to God's Plough good Mr. Ph. let not the flattery or fear of Men make you warp from the streight Rule of God's Word You know the most and worst that they can doe and with the same resolution make the Apostles choice Acts 20.24 He that will put the evil day from him may soonest fall by the evil of the day and instead of finding may loose this and eternal Life The evil of Sin will produce much worse than present Sufferings If God call you forth as he did the Martyrs with their Flood to give testimony to the Truth even those Sufferings they esteemed light for the Hope set before them an Eternal Weight of Glory at the greatest length our Lives are not long in this Word Death spares none not the greatest Monarchs a great Man is fallen in our Israel our late Sovereign I have very valuable Thoughts of you you will not despise small things which gives me this Presumption I know you have greater Motives from God's Exiting Grace in you to quicken you to and assist you in your Master's Work than my narrow Scantling can afford happy they that so do they shall neither be ashamed nor affraid when their Reckoning-day comes of which happy number Lord grant you to be I am good Mr. Ph. Your Assured Well-wishing Friend Elizabeth Walker March 15. 84. I publish the following Letter because I intend to give the Book to my plain Parishoners most of whom stand upon the same Level with him to whom it was written Persons of higher Rank may pass it by or give it to their plain Country Tenants I thought to have given an account how one of her Sister's Daughters came to be in so low a Condition whose Father might have given every Child more than a Thousand Pound had he continued the Diligence which he used for several Years after his Marriage with her Sister and the fair Portion he had with her but as she was not ashamed of her Condition no more am I and as things were 't is well she had an Aunt to assist her to match with a sober industrious Man and their joint Stock enable them to manage a Farm of about Fifty Pounds a Year on which they hitherto have and I hope will continue to live comfortably and contentedly Cousin Robert Glassock YOU have not a Friend that more truly desires your Welfare than my self and shall be most affectionately glad of your well-being in this present World but I hope I should much more rejoyce in your certain and assured Interest in a better Life I desire you may obtain both of God who is the giver of all good I beseech you that you may to apply your self to that direct Rule and guidance of God's Word which counsels you to seek the Kingdom of God with his Righteousness in the first place and then you have the Promise of him that is both faithfull and able to perform his Word That the things of this life shall be added unto you as an additional to your future Happiness to which if you could gain the Wealth of the whole World 't would be but like picking up of Straws and Pebbles compared to that Blessed Estate for any thing in Exchange he will make a bad Bargain that ventures the loss of his Soul It was the saying of a good Man that gave a right Judgment That the whole Turkish Empire was but a Crust the Master of the House threw to the Dog How then shall not God the Lord of the whole Universe provide for them of his own Family that are Heirs of the Kingdom of Heaven I request you let it appear to whom you belong shew it by your Christian Profession in the whole Course of your Life to which your Baptism hath engaged you with the Inscription of God's Law which get writ with an indelible Character by the Finger of his Spirit upon your Heart by the use of God's Word you may acquaint your self in your Bible There God gave his Commandments in few and plain words that the meanest Capacity might understand and remember them A great part of the Bible is an Exposition of them You can read it is your Mercy improve that Talent to your Master's use You cannot doe his Will except you know it Therefore as God's Word directs you so observe to doe his Will that you may have regard unto all his Commandments in keeping of them there is great reward Therefore mind the Precepts and put them into practice heed the threatnings against whom and for what that they may deterr and affright you from the way of Sin that you may avoid the end of Punishment Take notice of the Promises and value them as they are worth make them yours by fervent and frequent Prayer and fulfilling the Conditions of them This I do earnestly request of you and the same of your Wife and that you will Pray together and a-part that you may be Heirs together of eternal Life Set up religious Worship in your little Family the smalness of your Family will not excuse the neglect God as he doth require it he will regard where there is but Two or Three he hath promised to be with them I beseech you do not deferr in any known Duty least disuse give you more difficulty to future performance Habitual Customs are most prevalent But to quicken you to this Duty consider for the default of it God's threatning Jeremiah 10. the last I pray you take that Counsel 1 Chron. 28.9 Not to be so bad as others is a step to a good Life But he that goes no farther will fall short of eternal Life I have so good thoughts of you your disposition is not to the Debaucheries and Vices of some but negative Righteousness is not enough With other religious Duties I have already mentioned I most earnestly press you to a strict Observation of the Lord's Day Sanctifie God's Seventh Day and he will Bless your Six Days Labour It will also be a good Hedge not onely to secure your eternal State but all that God may bless you with in this World See the two last Verses of the 58. Isa Read the whole Chapter it may be very profitable to excite you but I beseech you do not violate that Holy Rest by unnecessary Employments in worldly Affairs nor spend that Day in Idleness or Sleeping more than you would in the other Six Days Do not sacrilegiously rob God of his Worship in any part of his Day do not divert by vain talk but give every proportion of time the Duties it requires Be not like those that were weary of the Sabboth Amos 8.5 See likewise Malachi 1st and 3d. Mark the extent of the Fourth Commandment it doth not only require Masters of Families but reacheth all under their Charge their care is required as well for their Souls as their Bodies or else there is no difference made of them from their Cattle therefore you must
Kingdom of Satan may fall and the Kingdom of Christ be exalted that the Gospel may continue where it is and sent where it is not and received in the Love of it through the World Pray for all afflicted as their case requires and with thy Prayers and Praises give thanks to God for the prime Fountain of all his Mercies Christ Jesus In particular thou mayst mention at the Throne of Grace what Christ hath done and suffered for humble contrite Sinners Labour and beg for such a frame of Spirit such God not despise Express thy thankfulness for what Christ hath instituted and ordained in his Church for the Benefit and good of his People Thou mayst in particular express with Prayers and Praises That all may be applicatory to thy self These are short hints thou mayst enlarge God giving thee his Spirit of Grace and Supplication Let not vain Thoughts mingle with religious Duties beware of those wandring Vagrants do not take such Company with thee when thou drawest near to God in any Religious performance lest it be like offering strange fire provoke God rather to consume than bless thee but keep off those busie Flies they may not corrupt thy Sacrifice Say to all disturbing Thoughts as Abraham said to his Servants when he went to the Mount to Sacrifice Stay you here below till I go to Worship God Fervent Prayer is very prevalent with God of it may be said what is said of Faith which is a justifying Grace without which it is impossible to please God Heb. 11. For he that cometh to God must believe that he is and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him Good works are the Life of Faith being well performed for matter and manner without which Faith is Dead and God is not the God of the dead but of the living as the body without the spirit is dead so without works faith is dead also St. James 2. The great things a lively Faith hath done fervent Prayer hath done the same The little Book I sent thee was thy dear Mother's it is a good Discourse of Prayer Dear Johnny let thy Prayers and Praises with the sweet Incense of thy Love to God be offered to him on the golden Altar of an humble and sincere Heart in the mediation of Jesus Christ and put no religious Duty off with that foolish idle Excuse I have not time lest thou as the foolish Virgins were be unfurnish'd of Oil for the Lamp of thy Christian Profession and for thy neglect shut out of the Kingdom of Heaven If Time for Play Recreation Eating Sleeping or the like a due proportion of Time may be gained from them for thy best therefore thy most concern those indispensable Duties on which thy eternal welfare so much depends the neglect of them may be thy inevitable Ruine in this Life and that to come for Godliness hath the promise of both Therefore seek the Kingdom of Heaven in the first place and the things of this present Life shall be added to thee as may be good for thee The things of this World compared to God and Heaven are but Straws and Pibbles St. Paul calls them dross and Luther said The whole Turkish Empire is but a Crust God throws to the Dog God hath provided better things for those that love and seek him In this world is our preparatory Life for our future Estate I have oft said to thee That all Men are about this great Business but in a different way to a different end Good Men prepare for Heaven and Wicked Men prepare for Hell therefore avoid the broad-way of a sinfull Life which leads to Destruction chuse that way which comparatively few find the way of an holy Life the end of which is Peace which the World cannot give Dear Johnny Do not deferr thy great concern to serve God and save thy Soul more worth than Ten thousand Worlds Many much younger than thee have set about this great work Thou hast oft read Mr. Smythies's Book of the Benefit of early Piety also thou hast had a civil and religious Education and many more Prayers than thou art Days old Thy dear Grandfather's Care Counsel and Prayers mine have not been wanting as far as able to perform in my care and love of thee let them not condemn thee but labour to answer the end of them that thou mayst not disappoint God and us to thy own detriment and loss Dear Johnny where much is given the more will be required Time is precious use all lawfull Industry and Diligence for thy well being in this World and make all subservient for a better to come Thou knowest not how long God may continue thy Friends to thee She was not continued three Months nay thy own Life is uncertain all things in this World are so and there is no retrieving an Errour on the other side of Death Do not procrastinate take the wise Man's Counsel what thy hand findeth to doe doe it with all thy might which inferrs speed and diligence for the obtaining internal and external Blessings Deferring made St. Augusting cry out Too late too late Lord did I love thee Dear Johnny Do not put God off with a decrepid Love and the chill Spirits of old age and bodily Infirmity by which the operative Faculties of thy Soul through the organical Powers of the Body may be obstructed with defect and impeded with the ill Habits and Customs of Sin Avoid this Danger give to God the vigour and strength of thy Life let it be without blemish By God's appointment the young was brought to him in Sacrifice Do thou as Righteous Abel give to God thy firstlings thy first Love and suffer no Rival or Competitour with it it was the Test Christ put to his Disciples If ye love me keep my Commandments Dear Johnny I used to mind thee St. John thy own name let him be thy Example in thy Love to God he was the youngest Disciple most eminent in Christ's Love He was called the Disciple whom Jesus loved Dear Johnny Be not taken with the Gauds and Vanities of this World in any of the profers of it they will bite like an Adder and sting like a Serpent if they draw thy Heart from God Be not deceived by them they will put a lye in thy right-hand promising more than they can give Be not affected with vain Glory it is but a Puff of breath soon exhaled and will vanish from thee Yea so are all the things of this World for the duration of them Remember thy Baptismal Covenant with God thou didst promise to forsake the Pomps and Vanities of this World the Devil and all his Works and sinfull Appetites to them I was a Witness to this Engagement and one of thy Sureties Dear Johnny let thy Baptismal Vow through Grace preserve thy Morals untainted Let none be corrupted by thy ill Example and be not thou infected by the evil manners of others Speak no obscene or scurrilous Language