was offered with strength of Argument against gain-sayers She was eminent for the grace of Humility and when I have said that she was of an humble spirit what can be said more This the Apostle would have us to be cloathed withall 1 Pet. 5. 7. Humility is the ornament of all Graces It s that Salt that seasons the best parts and graces So humble was the spirit of this excellent Gentlewoman that the poorest might have free access unto her and receive curteous language from her mouth and liberal almes from her heart and hand both being opened wide for their relief The observation of this humble deportment from her child-hood gained the heart of her dear Husband unto her long before she was ripe for her Marriage Her humble spirit evidently appeared by her condescending to them of low estate the servants in her Family the poorest and meanest in the Parish where she lived will bear witness to the truth of this particular She was of a meek and quiet spirit which as the Apostle saith 1. Pet. 3. 3. is in the sight of God of great price All her Relations will attest her meek deportment and how much she hated brawls and contentions Her very enemies if they would speak their consicences can testifie her readiness to pass by injuries So far she was from rendring reviling for revilings that she endeavoured to recâ—mpence â—vil with good and prayed for such as despitefully used her professing that it was the desire of her â—â—ul to do her very enemies all the Christian offices of love which lay in her power Special notice ought also to be taken of her Wisdome and Gravity in the ordering of her conversation Her discourses were savoury administring Grace to the hearers and tending to edification Her behaviour was modest and grave though she was of a cheerfull spirit yet it was without levity She was no tatler busie-body no medler in the affairs of others She was no gadder up and down from house to house hearing and telling of news as too many do to the wounding of the reputations of others The vain and frivolous discourse of some who came to visit her was an heavy burden and affliction to her spirit The dicourses of such as tended to the defaming and blasting others reputation were a great grief and trouble unto her and when she heard such discourses she would endeavour to turn the stream another way and move such discourse as might be profitable for the souâ—s good Her Love was very eminent towards all those that feared God she was with David a Companion to such a lover of their acquaintance who were the Saints the excellent ones Psal. 16. 3. Insomuch as when she apprehended any thing of God though in persons inclining to separation and of a contrary judgement from her she was so compassionate as to labour with much sweetness and candour to convince them of their errours and to wâ—n them to the truth imitating herein the holy practice of learned Musculus who gained some Anabaptists and Sectaries by kindness and benefits and 〈◊〉 them as much by love as by arguments Her holy Courage deserves special notice for though she was humble meek and loving yet she was stout and couragious in declaring her judgement upon just occasions before those whom she knew to be contrary minded hating compliance against conscience and doubting alwayes the soundness and sincerity of those who duâ—st not own their opinions She was much of her worthy Fathers temper in that particular who hath been often heard to say that a Coward can hardly be an honest man and much of Esters resolution desiring rather to suffer her self than sluggishly and silently to see the truths of God to suffer She was a praying Christian She was much in prayers and tears much in a sacred acquaintance and holy communion with God Her gift in prayer was very great She was much in her Closet alone and there much upon her knees An excellent patern for womens imitation which by no means should suffer that great duty to be omitted It was a Character of Paul when converted Act. 9. 11. Behold he prayes Praying Christians are the best Christians they are prevailing Christians and as Reverend and holy Mr. Dod was used to say Never dâ—spair of that person who can but pray She was â—ixed and 〈◊〉 in Religion having frequently read the Scriptures 〈◊〉 many â—ound orthodox and practical Divines she became settled rooted and grounded in the truth She was one that held fast her profession without wavâ—ing She was not 〈◊〉 about with every wind of Doctrine Eph. 4. 14. neither was she of their humours who for politick ends comply with all companies in their opinions She kept close to the publick Ministry where she lived there she heard the word faithfully dispensed She neither was of their opinion nor practice who out of I know not what kinde of singularity separate from the Ministry of a godly Pastor and Husband Her delight was very great in Gods Ordinances and she was glad when they said Let us go to the house of the Lord in company She had such an high esteem of and longing desire unto the house of God that when her strength failed her she would be carried thither by reason of lameness the feet of her body were weak but the feet of her soul her affections were strong nimble and vigorous Look upon her in her Relations as a Wife a Mother and Mistress and you shall see she was mindefull of her duty to God in them all Her great care and endeavour was to set up God in her Family in order whereunto she bestowed great pains in Catechising of her children and other near Relations committed unto her charge Her great design was to bring them all up in the fear and admonition of the Lord and to inculcate again and again that main and needfull lesson of Remembring their Creator in the dayes of their youth Much pains she took in Catechising and instructing her servants especially before they were to receive the Sacrament of the Lords Supper She used to examine them of the Sermons they heard and she customarily read over those Sermon Notes to them which she had taken â—t Church that so they might be the better prepared to give an account thereof to her Husband God was pleased to give her several Olive branches round about her Table well bred well Catechised and well governed and of very great hopes As Eunice and Lois instructed young Timothy so she instructed those hopefull little ones in the holy Scriptures and acquainted them with the knowledge of God in their tender years Thus according to Solomons counsel they were trained up in the way wherein they should walk Prov. 21. 6. and that even from their childhood insomuch as one of them though very young hearing a neighbour using the name of the Lord upon a sleight occasion reproved him for it alleadging the Commandement
All that thou sees't and readest is Divine Learning thus vs'd is water turn'd to wine Well may wee then despaire to draw his minde View heere the case i' th Booke the Jewell finde 〈◊〉 sculpsit P. V. A. M. fecit A COLLECTION OF THE LIVES OF Ten Eminent Divines Famous in their Generations for Learning Prudence Piety and painfulness in the work of the Ministry Whereunto is added the Life of GVSTAVUS ERICSON King of Sueden who first Reformed RELIGION in that Kingdome and of some other Eminent Christians By Sa. Clarke Preacher of the Gospel in St Bennet Fink London Be ye followers of me even as I also am of Christ 1 Cor. 11. 1. Brethren be ye followers together of me and mark them which walk so as ye have us for an ensample Phil. 3. 17. Ministri vita censura Cynosura LONDON Printed for William Miller at the Guilded Acorn near the Little North-door in St. Pauls Church-yard 1662. To the Candid Reader CHRISTIAN READER I Here present thee with another Volume of the Lives of Ten Eminent Ministers of Jesus Christ and of some other Christians The acceptance of my former Labours in this kinde hath encouraged me to make some further progress herein We see how diligent the Papists have been to write and publish the Lives of their Rome-canonized Saints though most of them were but Ignes fatui that led men into Boggs of Errour or blinde leaders of the blinde as the Pharisees were in our Saviours time till both fell into the ditch How much more diligent and carefull should we be to perpetuate the Memories of those who were fixed Stars not in the Antichristian but in the true Church of Christ And truly if any Church in the Christian world since the Reformation much more through Gods great mercy hath the Church of England abounded with such And now what doth the Lord require of us but that we should be followers of those who through faith and patience inherit the Promises Good examples are for imitation bad for evitation Good examples put a kinde of life into men Even tired Jades seeing other Horses to gallop will easily be put into a gallop also and experience shews that its a good means for our quickning duely to observe the examples of such as have been forward in godlinesse according to that of the Apostle Phil. 3. 17. Mark them which walk so as you have us for an example It s the Spirits end in guiding some men in the right way and that eminently that by their walking therein they might excite others to follow them And it s also a special end of Regestring the Histories of the Saints departed For whatsoever was written aforetime was written for our learning and this is the best learning which we can reap from such Records to imitate their Excellencies and if it be possible to outstrip them therein God in his wisdome hath not Regestred them that they should be known onely as matter of Story for our delight but for our direction and imitation and to shew that the things which he requires of us are possible seeing they have been done by others before us as also to shew the way and means more plainly how to do them and to declare how gratefull and acceptable they are when done For the Scriptures are not penned altogether in a commanding stile but have sweet alluring Examples mingled with the Precepts There are four wayes saith an eminent Divine of teaching Rule Reason Similitudes and Examples The two former enjoyn but work not upon the affections and as for Smilitudes they are for illustration onely Examples conform us in a sweet alluring manner and that we may receive good from good Examples these Rules are to be observed 1. We must eye and pry into them which is the very end why God hath left us a continuall succession of good Examples 2. We must eye them not to observe their weaknesses to discover their shame for this is a poysonous disposition neither may we observe them thereby to take liberty to the flesh from what is amiss in them but we must eye them as we look into Glasses to dress and adorn our selves thereby 3. We must eye them for imitation We must look upon the best and the best in the best We must not compare our selves with those who are inferiour to us in Gifts and Graces For he that thinks himself good by comparison is not good at all St. Paul saith Brethren be ye followers of me even as I am of Christ He propounded to himself the most excellent pattern of all even of Christ himself and he blamed the Corinthians because they measured themselves by themselves 2 Cor. 10. 12. 4. We must labour for soft and sanctified hearts for a stony heart will receive no impression 5. We must look to every one that hath any good thing worthy imitation For in every Christian there is something imitable and therefore St. Paul longed to see the Romans that he might be comforted by their faith Rom. 1. 12. 6. Lastly In things concerning which there is no certain rule to direct us we ought to imitate the Examples of the most holy and sober Christians as in the fashion of our apparrel the length of our hair c. And as good examples are very profitable so there is much danger in those that are evil which by reason of the corruption of our natures are great incentives and allurements to sin Nemo errat uni sibi sed dementiam spargit in proximos accipitque invicem saith Seneca No man erres to himself also but disperseth and communicates his folly to his Neighbours alone and interchangeably receiveth the like from them And as evil Examples are hurtfull in all so they are most pernicious in superiours For seldome do these tall Cedars fall but they beat down all the low shrubs about them Thus Magistrates by their evil example corrupt their subjects Parents their children Masters their servants and especially Princes their people seeing all the Country either for fear or flattery is apt to conform to their Examples Ea conditio est Principis ut quicquid faciat praecipere videatur saith Quintilian Princes actions stand for precepts and their examples have the power of a Law to draw their subjects to imitation As the Heliotrope moves after the Sun so do subjects follow the manners of their Princes Regis ad exemplum totus componitur Orbis Alexander the Great used to carry his head on the one side whereupon his Nobles and Courtiers in imitation of him did the like The common people saith one are like a flock of Cranes as the first flyes all the rest follow after or as a Beast where all the body follows the Head Rulers sins do much hurt as by imputation Delirant Reges plectuntur Achivi so by imitation For man is an Apish creature apter to be led by his eyes than by his ears Magis intuentur quid fecerit Jupiter quam quid docuit
so far from cooling and diminishing as that they encreased and that deservedly to his last rather than decreased amongst all that had learned Christ in humility and truth And as for those few silly seduced ones who were carried away towards his latter end with a spirit of giddiness through the secret and subtile insinuations and whisperings of false Teachers in corners who with as much ignorance as confidence delude the simple by great swelling words of vanity and uncouth phrases abhorrent from Christian Religion sobriety and truth and which wise men lament while fools who are ignorant of the depths and methods of Satan applaud and admire endeavoured in their virtigenous fits to eclipse his credit and splendour yet his pious and affectionate Essayes to reclaim them with the spirit of meekness as also his fervent Prayers and yearning Bowels for their reducing turned all their revilings to his greater lustre and glory amongst all such as were able to discern of things that differ and willing to approve the things that are excellent Not long after Mr. Crook's first setling in this his Pastorall charge he happily married a Wife of his own Tribe and after his own heart who was the eldest daughter of that Reverend Mr. Walsh an holy and painfuâ—l Minister in Suffolk a great and rare Light in his time and famous for his Ministeriall labours his fervent zeal and abundant charity She was a very prudent and gratious woman a most loyall loving and tender wife zealous and active for his encouragement credit and comfort in all things especially in his Ministry to which she constantly bore such hearty respect and reverence as did much quicken and enlarge him in the work of the Lord. She was also continually studious and carefull to free and ease him of all emergent occasions avocations and businesses of ordinary concernment that so he might with the more freedom follow what his soul most delighted in his diviner imployments and enjoy himself and friends in his necessary relaxations In a word her behaviour was such as becometh holiness a teacher of good things to the younger women and in her Family a worthy pattern and a great promoter of godliness in all that conversed with her and to her Husband a meet help indeed and so she continued all the dayes of their conjugall relation Children he left none besides those spiritually begotten unto Christ by his labours in the Gospell His great delight and indefatigable pains in preaching so many years so frequently was almost beyond all example for he constantly preached if in health thrice a week besides his extraordinary labours on many emergent occasions which he cheerfully embraced as rejoycing in all opportunities of doing good and that abroad as well as at home In all his Sermons which were many thousands his expressions were choice grave solid weighty savoury and seasonable His applications home and pertinent strongly enforced and set on from Divine authority by a sweet and moving elocution a masculine eloquence fervent zeal and strength of love to the souls of the hearers He knew very well how to set forth 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 abstruse points plainly and how to manage 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 plain truths elegantly not in the words of mans wisdome but which the Holy Ghost teacheth Alwayes speaking in Christ as of God in the sight of God He was not like one that makes a Feast once a moneth or once a quarter letting his Family beg or starve in the intervals Nor like such as visit the Pulpit twice every Sabbath day yet bring no new matter with them scarce once a moneth but still are setting on the same dishes with a little new garnish even unto nauseousness But our Mr. Crook as he layed in richly so he layed out liberally and prudently like a ready Scribe instructed to the Kingdom of God or a good Housholder who brings forth of his treasury things both new and old And albeit he could by his quick invention profound Judgment and faithfull memory things rarely meeting in the same man dexterously dispatch that with little labour which costs other men much pains yet he seriously professed with rejoycing that he never durst serve God with that which cost him nothing well knowing that industry adds weight and respect both to the matter and speaker whereby his words became as goods and nails fastened by that great Master of the Assemblies which are given from one Shepherd His Motto was Impendam expendar I will spend and be spent which he cheerfully verified For he counted not his life dear in comparison of preaching the Gospell and of finishing his course with joy and the Ministry he had received from the Lord Jesus to testifie the Gospell of the Grace of God When he was told by his Physician who was very carefull to preserve his life that he might live longer if he would preach seldomer Alas said he If I may not labour I cannot live what good will life doe me if I be hindred from the end of living Et propter vitam vivendi perdere causam When through age and weakness he was disenabled from travelling abroad any more to perfume other Congregations with the sweet odours of his pretious ointment and when by reason of his years and infirmities he might very well as an emeritus miles have sued out even in the Court of Heaven it self a Writ of ease and have passed the rest of his dayes in rejoycing over his Triumphs and Trophies yet would he never give over studying and Preaching till all strength of Body gave him over Yea he often preached even when his legs almost refused to carry him any more to Church and that with much spirit and unexpected vivacity even as a mighty man refreshed with the Wine of Gods Spirit And being some years before his departure sensible of the daily approaches of Death which he long expected to his exhausted and decayed body almost ready to be deserted of its Divine Soul he did severall times preach his own Funerall Sermon as supposing he should never preach more and that not without the tears proceeding from the grief of his loving and beloved hearers And when after such preaching and rejoycing in it he invited as his constant manner was such Ministers and Friends as came to hear his Lecture to his Table he would force himself to sit with them although for the most part he was forced to be silent by reason of the expence of his spirits and much rejoyced that he had once more imployed his Masters Talent and enjoyed the precious society of Saints in whom was all his delight He used often to say to his friends that rejoyced with him and blessed God for him that he was nothing but a voice as being troubled at the decayes of nature growing upon him more and more whereby his feeble body was disenabled from serving his still active soul and his Tongue being no longer able to
University being a means to set up Lectures in many of them and very often assisting in them and as our Savior is observed by some Divines to have preached more frequently the nearer he was to his departure so this his faithful servant as it were presaging that his day would be but short towards his evening he made the more haste and speed in his journy towards his end and yet more abounded in this work of the Lord and now findes That his labour is not in vain in the Lord 1 Cor. 15. 58. Thus of him as a Minister And lastly as he was a Christian he was active for God as his Saviour Act. 10. 38. Going up and down and doing good and though otherwise modest yet when the case required it bold in a good cause He was spiritual in communion and a quickner of those with whom he conversed Fruitful in discourse by which the frame of his spirit might easily be discovered Frequent in asking questions which was both his humility and Christian good husbandry thereby to improve himselfe his time and company Affable he was to others of much humility and low thoughts of himself and of great integrity and singleness of heart towards God his Truth Ordinances wayes and servants of a very publick spirit and much affected with the various conditions of the State but especially of the Church and people of God He was a most loving Husband to his wife and a dutiful son to his Parents and in his life time very helpful to his other Relations Many poor both of the University and Town do now feel the want of his bounty which they tasted of in his life time and both they and others had done more at his death as appeared by his intentions of it in the draught of his Will had not the suddenness of his change prevented it In a long continued Quartan God had knocked at his door which in the interim of his recovery awakened him to get all within ready against the coming of his Lord which though to his friends was unexpected yet found not him unprepared In his short sickness he expressed to an intimate Friend his great comfort and joy in Gods discriminating electing-love and to a Reverend Doctor about half an hour before his departure who enquired of him about the setling of his outward estate and inward peace he readily and without the least hesitancy answered that throâ—gh the mercy of God in Christ his peace was made and that he quietly rested in it whereby it seems as was said by one he had his Faith at his fingers ends and having before given all diligence to make his calling and election sure though he was somewhat suddenly called out of this life yet had he an abundant entrance set open to him into the everlasting Kingdome of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ departing quietly in the Lord Decem. 18. 1653. As to himself he had lived a fruitful and gracious life and therefore as Clemens Romanus speaks of some of the first and best Bishops he closed up all with a happy and blessed death and as to others he lived approved and dyed desired and very much lamented He was a great Friend to the publication of the lives of godly and eminent Ministers and Christians and assisting to me in procuring information concerning the Lives of some of those Worthies whom I have formerly printed Dr. WILLIAM GOUGE The Life and Death of Dr. Gouge who dyed Anno Christi 1653. WIlliam Gouge was born in Stratford-Bow in the County of Middlesex Novem. 1. Anno 1575. His Father Mr. Thomas Gouge was a godly Gentleman His Mother was the vertuous and pious Daughter of Mr. Nicholas Culverel a Merchant in London and she was sister to those two famous Preachers Mr. Samuel and Mr. Ezekiel Culverel she had also two sisters who were married to those two famous and learned Divines Dr. Chaderton the Master of Emanuel College in Cambridge and Dr. Whitaker the Regius Professor of Divinity in the same University so that by the Mothers side he came of a stock of eminent Preachers Our William Gouge in his younger years was first trained up in Pauls School London and was afterwards sent to a Free-school at Felsted in Essex where he was trained up three years under the publick Ministry of his Uncle Mr. Ezekiel Culverel by whose labours he was much wrought upon and if not first begotten yet much built up in his holy Faith as himself often expressed From thence he was sent to Eaton where he was educated other six years during all which time he was more than ordinarily studious and industrious for when other boyes upon play-dayes took liverty for their sports and pastimes he would be at his book wherein he took more delight than others could finde in their Recreations whereby he profited beyond many his equals At this time whilst he was a Schollar at Eaton he was possessed with an holy fear of God was conscionable in secret prayer and in sanctifying the Sabbaths and was much grieved at the ordinary prophanation thereof by sports and pastimes which were then and there too much allowed as he did oft-times in his life with much thankfulness unto God express From the School at Eaton he was chosen to Kings College in Cambridge whither he went Anno Christi 1595. and at the first entrance of his studies he applied himself to P. Ramus his Logick and grew so expert therein that in the publick Schools he maintained and defended him insomuch as when on a time divers Sophisters set themselves to vilifie Ramus for which end the Respondent had given this question Nunquam erit magnus cui Ramus est magnus which some of the Sophisters hearing and knowing the said William Gouge to be an accute disputant and a stiff defender of Ramus they went to the Divinity Schools where he was then hearing an Act and told him how in the other Schools they were abusing Ramus he thereupon went into the Sophisters Schooles and upon the Moderators calling for another Opponent he stepped up and brought such an argument as stumbled the Respondent whereupon the Moderator took upon him to answer it but could not satisfie the doubt This occasioned a Sophister that stood by to say with a loud voice Do you come to vilifie Ramus and cannot answer the Argument of a Ramist Whereupon the Moderator rose up and gave him a box on the ear then the School was all on an uproar but the said William Gouge was safely conveyed out from amongst them When he was Senior Sophister he was chosen Moderator of the Sophisters Acts in the publick Schools which was a place of great credit and he began every Act with a solemn speech in Latine which was not usual in those dayes and it added much grace to the Act. The said William Gouge took his degrees in order performing for every one of them all those
was exceeding skilful and dextrous as many hundreds in the City have found from time to time being sought unto far and near by such as groaned under afflictions and tentations many of whom through Gods blessing upon his labours were restored to joy and comforts out of unspeakable terrors and torments of Conscience He was of a most sweet and meek disposition yea such was his meekness of spirit that it seemeth not to be paralleld For though he lived with his wife above twenty years yet neither childe nor servant could ever say that they saw so much as an angry countenance or heard so much as an angry word proceed from him towards her all her life long Some have observed that towards his latter end in his visage he did much resemble the Picture that is usually made for Moses Certainly he was the exact Effiges of Moses his spirit and in this resembled him to the life that he was one of the meekest men that this Generation hath known He was as a great peace-keeper so a great peace-maker having an excellent dexterity in composing of differences he was far from doing wrong to others and as far from revenging wrong done to him by others Notwithstanding which he suffered much both by the speeches and also by the actions of evil and envious persons yet his manner was rather to pray for them than in any harsh manner to retaliate like for like He alwayes judged that revilers and injurious persons wronged themselves more than him Sundry scandalous and false aspersions were cast upon him yea by such persons as were guilty of those very crimes which they laid to his charge For some who lived by the unwarrantable trade of Usury to justifie their own unlawful practices have not stuck to charge the same upon him though he was alwayes free from it never putting out any money to use either by himself or any other for him neither directly nor indirectly as he hath been often heard to affirm both in his life time and not long before his death Being chosen President of Sion College according to the custome when he left his Office he preached a learned and polite Latine Sermon ad clerum which he delivered by the strength of his memory without the help of his notes which shewed that though his body was decrepit and feeble yet his intellectuals were vivid quick and vigorous He was very charitable especially to the godly poor according to that direction of the Apostle Gal. 6. 10. where he exhorts us to do good to all but especially to the houshold of Faith He maintained some poor Schollars in the University wholly at his own charge and contributed liberally towards the maintenance of others Indeed he set apart a Sacrea stock as he called it a portion for the poor proportionable to his receits which he faithfully distributed Yea he was of such a charitable and bountiful a disposition that though his Father left him a competent estate yet such were his annual disbursements for his kindred and others that stood in need of relief that from the time of his Fathers death till his children came to be of years and so to call for their portions he laid up nothing of all his comings in whereby it may appear that they who out of envy cry up his estate to be greater than it was do consequently cry up his bounty and charity For that whatsoever his estate was it was wholly laid out for the relief of such as stood in need necessary expences for his Family only excepted which as it doth appear by his Papers so in his life time he professed it to some of his Children and truly as in other things he excelled many others so in this he excelled himself He was very conscientious in the expence of his time from his youth to the very time of his death His custome was to rise very early both in the Winter and Summer In the Winter time he constantly rose so long before day as that he alwaies performed all the exercises of his private devotions before day-light And in the Summer time he rose about four a clock in the morning by which means he had done half his work before others began their studies If he happened to hear any at their work before he began his studies he would say as Demosthenes spake concerning the Smith that he was much troubled that any should be at the works of their Calling before he was at his He was a man of much temperance and sobriety both in his eating drinking and apparrel And for Recreations howsoever many pious persons do spend time therein and that lawfully in warrantable Recreations yet he spent none of his so whence it was that he was never expert in any kinde of sports He hath been often heard to say that he never took any journey meerly of pleasure in all his life-time Study and pâ—ins were alwayes both in youth and age his chefest pleasure and delight yea it was his meat and drink to be doing the will of his heavenly Father wherein he took as much pleasure and delight as natural men do in their eating and drinking or in their disports and pastimes Such was his deportment in his conversation that there was scarce a Lord or Lady or Citizen of quality in or about the City that were piously affected but they sought his acquaintance and were ambitious to enjoy his company wherein they took much content and found much benefit to their souls thereby And whereas many persons of quality out of their great respect to him came to visit him he would so endeavour to order their conference as might tend most to their edification and if their visits were meerly complemental he soon grew weary and accounted it a burden to him He was alwayes of a very friendly and courteous disposition in so much as the meanest not only of his own Parish but of the City found easie access to him and he was as easie to be intreated yea ready to do what good he could to all And amongst other Graces his humility was very eminent and exemplary Though others knew 〈◊〉 when his face did not shine yet he knew not when it did He that readily could observe the least glimpses or appearances of any worth in others would not acknowledge them in himself He was as it was said of Nazianzen high in imployments and abilities but low in his disposition and resentment of his own worth He was not observed to be puffed up either with the multitudes that flocked unto his Ministry which were many and great nor with any applauses of men but would still say That he knew more by himself to abase him than any could know to extol him yea so eminent was his Humility that he charged his Executor to whom he committed the care of his Funeral that there should no Green-staffe be laid upon his Herse though this usual respect
be too much taken up with quaint and Historicall flourishes there is a sensible decay of the power of God amongst us An Exotick or strange tongue in the publick Congregation whatever men think of it is set out as a sign of Gods displeasure 1 Cor. 14. 21 22. It feeds such humors as should rather be purged out It had no good effect in the Church of Corinth Mens wits will waxe wanton when they be not over-awed by the plain power of Gods Word When Preachers keep not close to the very words of our Lord Jesus Christ 1 Tim. 6. 3. and to the Doctrine that is according to godliness but love to be tampering with another Doctrine though not with another in the main but even in the manner of delivery only as when it savours too much of the pomp of humane eloquence saith Calvin when it differs from the stile of the Holy Ghost saith Danaeus the people be in danger of turning aside to vain jangling to perverse disputings desiring to be teachers and such like matters The Gold upon the Pill may please the eye but it profits not the patient The Paint upon the Glass may feed the fancy but the room is the darker for it The Sword of Gods Spirit can never wound so deep as when it 's plucked out of these gaudy Scabbards Nakedness deforms too too many in these dayes but it is the best garnishing and Ornament the truth can have A sober dress best becomes a grave Matron There be words as well as things which the Holy Ghost teacheth 1 Cor. 2. 13. The Arrows fetched out of Gods own Quiver will pierce the deepest and make the people fall the soonest under Christ. The weakness of God is stronger than men Pauls weapons were mighty The sincere milk of Gods Word will make Christs Babes to grow best This curious age is too too much given to the affectation of words and phrases and cadencies and holy Dr. Sibs was wont to say that great affectation and good affections seldome goe together The swelling words of vanity may tickle the ear tip the tongue and please in matters of discourse but when it comes to push of Pike they afford but little comfort Mr. Capel had another manner of wisdome than that of words He was an able Minister of the New Testament not of the letter but of the Spirit that hath given doth give and will give life 2 Cor. 3. 6. Having this hope then he used great plainness of speech and by the manifestation of the truth he commended himself to every mans conscience in the sight of God and thereby hath so well seasoned the Country where he lived that the fruit of it without doubt will remain and be seen many years after His Prayers were lively and fervent He was a man that had a very large measure of that Spirit of grace which is a Spirit of Supplication He was so well fitted with abilities to open his mind to God as if with blessed Bradford he had been almost ever upon his knees He could tell his own errand or any other mans at the Throne of grace with as good freedome and to as good purpose as any man living He would not be rash with his mouth when he came before God nor set out what he had to say there with painted eloquence or Court-like complement but his mouth used to be filled with such savoury Arguments as very well became an humble Suppliant He was far from those battologies and miserable extravagancies that too many prayers are stuffed with He would pour out his soul to God at all manner of times upon all manner of occasions with all manner of Prayer and Supplication and with that admirable variety of all sorts of quickening and feeling meditations that it would even ravish the hearts of those who had the happiness to be partakers with him therein Yet for all this he was clear in his opinion for the lawfulness of the use of set Forms of Prayer according to the tenet of all our best and most judicious Divines and according to the practice of all Churches even the best reformed saith Mr. Rogers now and in all former ages So saith Mr. Hildersam yea and Mr. Smith himself saith upon the Lords Prayer though as then he was warping and afterwards wandred far in the wayes of Separation that it was the practice of the ancient Church and of all the Reformed Churches in Christendome of the Churches immediately after the Apostles nay saith he of the Church in the time of the Apostles as may probably be gathered out of 1 Cor. 14. 26. This hath also been the practice of the best lights that ever were set up in the Churches of Christ. It is very well known that the flower of our own Divines went on in this way when they might have done otherwise if they had pleased in their Prayers before their Sermons Nay Mr. Dod himself would seldome end his devotions in his own Family but with the use of the Lords Prayer Nay yet more Mr. Cartwright Hist. Christ. p. 3. p. 535. thinks it very probable that Christ his own self made use of a set Form at meales It is not good to cast stones of offence in the way of our weak Brethren who being of meaner parts want ability memory and audacity to conceive Prayer especially before others that they be not taken off from nor disheartened in this so comfortable and necessary a service of God nor may we lay a trap or snare for our own feet Who knoweth what times may pass over him If God should plunge us into the Ditch and leave us labouring in the noose the loftiest of us all may be faign to take relief from and to make use of these poor contemptible props and crutches as some deem and call them When the soul is so troubled that it cannot speak but Chatter only like a Crane and Swallow Psal. 77. 4. When it is so full of grief that it can do no more than sigh and groan and make a confused noise as Psal. 55. 2. it will then be glad to catch at any thing to give it self vent by Dr. Harris tells us of a second Bradford that in time of his distress was fain to adopt Mr. Bradfords words and to spread them before God as his own because he had said more for him as he thought than he could say for himself I knew saith mine Author a rare and eminent Divine indeed that would be as often upon his knees as any man that ever I conversed with that would sometimes be in such damps that had no more to set before God to give his heart ease by than the words of David in the one and fiftieth Psalm Well might then this knowing Divine of ours that had been so tossed with tempests be tender of that that might be so usefull for poor trembling hearts in a stormy day Get to God therefore as thou canst Sad judgements be upon our people Spirituall
improper in matters of Religion they savour of singularity breed rents and divisions between Preachers and people and take off the minde from things more essential Learned men have observed that Hereticks gat great advantage by the unwary speeches of the Fathers Some of Calvins expressions that were not so well pondered have done no great good to some in our times Nestorius fell into his Heresie by defending an improper speech of his and Eutyches thinking to mend it fell into the other extream Dr. Thomas Tailor speaks much to this point to very good purpose in his Progress to Holiness p. 134 135 154. and concludes that if we will keep the faith of our Fathers we must keep the words of our Fathers Our Mr. Capel was a man of a single heart He was with Jacob Gen. 25. 27. a plain man i. e. A downright honest man as the Original signifies A very Nathaniel an Isralite indeed Joh. 1. 47. in whom though there was some infirmity yet there was no guile He had much of the wisdome that is from above and was as far from Hypocrisie as most men living If all others were of his temper Momus had no need to complain of the want of a window into any mans breast He was what he was indeed and in truth without dissimulation He was very high in his conformity to those Primitive Christians Act. 2. 46. and left a brave President to all that would be what they should be in this particular We of this doubting and deceitful Generation had need to look about us and see what was here set before us in very legible Characters that we may learn to be more above board in our dealings We are faln into an age like that of the Prophets wherein every one hath too much of the Hypocrite We may well cry Help Lord for the faithful fail with a double Heart and double tongue do they speak The most be for all Tides and Times as mutable as the Weather-cock For any manner of Mode so as they can serve their own turns by it Some can be any thing but what they should be We have need to beware of men where every brother will supplant The Hypocrite with his mouth destroyes his Neighbour Prov. 11. 9. It is indeed good to be wise as Serpents but withall we should be innocent as Doves Though it be just with God that the deceiver shall be deceived and some like it well yet is it not just in those that do it They that turn aside to crooked wayes shall be led forth with the workers of iniquity Psal. 125. 5. Plain dealing is a Jewel yea though it be in sin as this acute man tells us in his â—entat Part. 3. It s a dainty fine thing in our confessions repentance and in all wherein we act He that useth it what ever men say or think shall neither live nor dye a beggar Downright honesty is the best policy It is delightful to God Prov. 12. 22. and it will be a comfort to us 2 Cor. 1. 12. This is our rejoycing and we never eat â—ur meat with more gladness than when we do all with singleness of heart Act. 2. 46. Mr. Capel was a very useful man in his life He was with Melancthon born for the common good and lived for the publick benefit of the whole Country Whilst he was at his Pastoral charge he gave himself fully and wholly to Reading to Exhortation and Doctrine and his profiting appeared unto all men so that he was generally and that justly reputed a man approved of God rightly dividing the word of truth It is well known what pains he took and to how good purpose during the whole time of his abode there which was about one and twenty years He preached constantly twice every Lords day and besides preached a Lecture constantly every week though he had but an infirm body till by reason of sickness he was taken off And then besides his Sabbath-dayes work he preached onely upon the Festival dayes His lips were touched with a coal from the Altar It may truly be said of him as it was of Musculus that his words pierced like a two-edged sword He could when he pleased be a Boanerges a son of Thunder but his bent was most to be a Barnabas a son of Consolation He was a true Evangelical Preacher and comforted many a drooping heart by his labours in publick and gave abundance of satisfaction in private to many troubled spirits that used to resort to him out of all Countries both far and near He also shewed himself to be a Tree of Gods own planting by bringing forth more fruit still in his age When the times were such some flying so extreamly high the Ceremonies being pressed with rigour and grievous penalties inflicted that he being tender in matters of Conformity must needs quit his Pastoral charge which was Novem. 27. 1634 he betook himself then to his little Cell as Samuel did to his Ramah that had never been looked upon if he had not come thither no more than Islebium and Bretta if not for Luther and Melancthon and there he had more health and cheerfulness of spirit than formerly which he improved well for the publick advantage For There he fell upon the Practice of Physick He indeed had bent his studies that way before hand foreseeing what would follow yet would he do nothing in that kinde it not being his Calling so long as that great work of the Ministry lay upon him But when he had quit the more special tye of the care of mens souls he then took himself to be at more freedome and having a License sent him by the Bishop of Gloucester to authorize him he fell upon the cure of mens bodies and being of great sufficiency his fame was quickly spread abroad He was looked upon as a very Trismegistus or a second Aesculapius He could do much at the diving into a disease and in applying such medicines as were proper and fit Not like some that will be tampering with that Profession and give their doses at adventure He was quick yet in cases of difficulty and danger he would weigh things well In desperate diseases he would adventure far according to the rules of Reason what he gave should be safe He mixed all with his own hands he would stoop to the meanest and serve all at an easie rate His Receits amounted not to the half nay not to one quarter of a common Apothecaries Bill He was blessed by God with great and good success and had resort especially towards his latter end out of his own and other Countries so that he had not leasure to sit at his own meals in quiet Yea many times he was quite tired out till God called him to rest His words were seasonable and savoury His tongue was a Tree of life His lips fed many Whosoever came near him should have something dropping if he did but
it the subject of their discourse He was much more than he seemed to be not loving to make a noise in the world but accounting it better to do than to speak In his works of charity to the poor he was no less discreet than private When he met with fit objects his hand was more ready to give than his tongue to proclaim it Indeed he was no friend to idle lazy canting persons who live on the sweat of other mens brows These he looked upon as the Pests of the Commonwealth nor could he think it charity to relieve such to the prejudice of the publick and to their own destruction But Gods poor and the Houshold of Faith lay neer his heart Whosoever shall survey his large Bills of weekly and quarterly allowances besides considerable summes given to poor Ministers and especialiy to their Widows and Orphans who never knew whence it came and shall adde thereunto his Legacies bequeathed in his Will to charitable uses cannot what ever others thought of him but judge that his charity exceeded the ordinary proportion of his revenues Naturally he was of a stout and masculine temper yet through Grace he attained to a great measure of humility He was mean and low in his own eyes and had more undervaluing thoughts of himself than all the world besides had of him He was very sensible of that enemy which he often complained of viz. Discouragement which he used to stile The childe of Pride and Unbelief It must needs be acknowledged a great measure of humility that could keep a man lowly under such abilities attainments and such general applauses as he met with in every place His usual saying was that he valued no man for his gifts but for his humility under them Neither should he expect much from any man were his parts never so great till he was broken with Afflictions and Temptations It was his observation that the humblest Preachers converted most souls not the choisest Schollars wâ—ilst unbroken He would sometimes use this speech which though a seeming contradiction yet hath it much truth in it It is better to be an humble Devil than a proud Angel He never affected popular applause variety of Pulpits Printing c. as one conscious to himself of I know not what unworthiness neither ever came he thus abroad but when by importunity he was haled to it 2. Consider him as a man in his Morals whether in the Government of himself in particular or of his Family or his greater trusts and in all you shall finde him like himself excellent and almost without a parallel In regard of himself he was exactly temperate confining himself to hours for diet sleep c. He would often say That he would rather pour liquor into his Boots than into his mouth between meals He was a strict observer of those Laws of Sobriety which St. Paul had pressed upon Ministers and which himself in his Drunkards Cup had taught others He used to eat seasonably and sparingly which without question was one great means of preserving such vigorous spirits to so great an age His onely play time was Saturdayes in the afternoon then he used to unbend and disburden himself by some innocent Recreations but onely ad Ruborem He was a man of an excellent deportment and sweet behaviour whereby he won much upon all with whom he conversed Grave he was without affectation pleasant without levity Indeed he never loved to hear himself talk and therefore by some was judged too reserved but when he knew with whom he had to do he was communicative enough No man was more candid or fuller of civility none more open or free to entertain or return discourses He was very cautious before he struck a league of intimate friendship with any man but when he had once chosen he was cordial firm and constant his head hand tongue pen feet purse all were now no longer his own but his friends It is said of the French that whatsoever cloaths they wear whatsoever Garb they accost you in becomes them so well as if nothing else did and a great Critick in men as well as in Books used to say of our doctor that whatsoever he did or spake became him It was a rare thing to see him angry If at any time the folly of others had discomposed him or their sin had provoked him yet could he quickly command himself and convert his passion into wholesome instruction Though himself had great parts both natural and acquired yet would he never sleight or undervalue much less contemn or discourage any whom he judged to be right in the main He was very sparing in his censures of others gentle to all and severe onely to himself He had a special gift of forgetting injuries but would offer none His memory was never more faithfull than in retaining civilities received to which he would industriously make what proportionable returns lay in his power He much feared lest he should give any occasion of suspicion that he either forgot or neglected any because he could not readily recall mens names which occasioned him to say That if he lived long he should forget his own name with him in Valerius At meals his manner was to be sociable and facetious yet still he took occasion to enquire of the Publick and how it feared with particular Towns and Families whence he would alwayes extract something for matter of Prayer or Prayer or Praise in his Thanksgiving after meat In his Family he had that qualification of a good Bishop mentioned by the Apostle that ruled well his own house He had an excellent method in the education of his Children which was this In general his care was to maintain his authority over them yet even that authority was equally tempered with lenity and gravity He loved them without fondness and ruled them without rigour In particular so soon as they could use their tongues they were made acquainted with the Historical part of the Scriptures As soon as they could use their legs they were set to School and when they could remember any thing of a Chapter read or bring home any part of a Sermon his care was to instruct them in the Fundamentals of Religion Their childehood being past he would call upon them for the practice of Religion and was a diligent observer of their private performance of Religious exercises wherein their Mother was no small help to him When they grew up to more maturity he diligently observed their capacities inclinations but especially their constitutions when he could guess at that sin which was like to prove their dilectum delictum their darling corruption he accordingly suited their Callings so as that sin might be least nourished and most beaten down The rule which he gave them was this When you are youths chuse your Callings when men chuse your wives only take me along with you It may be old men may see further than you
was of their own Country and neighbourhood The Kings spirit was too great to like of conditions from his Subjects yet his wisdome prevailed to take into consideration the condition of his affairs He considered that Christian was now in Norwey That Winter was newly begun That the Norwegians were inclined to assist Christian And that if the Dallcarles should be further provoked the issue might be doubtfull He therefore dissembled his displeasure and sent them a Governour according to their desire But at the end of three years he raised an Army and seized upon the chief Authors of this rebellion and put them to death and further to bring down the pride of the Dallcarles he seized upon their liberties and so levelled them with the rest of the people This was the first malignant design against the Government of Gustavus in favour of the cause of the deposed King which like a Granado firing in the air spent it self before it fell but it proved not the last For soon after the King of Denmark died leaving Christian a prisoner to the Lords of Denmark who differing in their opinions as to the election of a King spent two years in an Interregnum during which time some sought to promote the Son of the deceased King which was but a child and therefore more capable of counsell and herein the Bishops joyned Others acted for the Duke of Holst and some were for restoring Christian then a prisoner to the Crown again This was one summons to the King of Sueden to look about him and kept him off from punishing the Dallcarles for the matter about the Bells But there was another thing that was no less dangerous though the effect was not like to be so sudden and that was this About this time there was a change of Government in Lubeck from the Popish to the Lutheran way which although in it self it suited well enough with the King of Suedens mind yet in such alterations there is commonly one man more active than the rest who in such alterations of Religion becomes an instrument of altering the Government And such an one the Lubeckers had fitted for the purpose His name was Woolweaver a man whose education was answerable to his name Him they made Consul of the City and he being gotten up was blown higher by affecting popularity and undertaking to be a Protector to the poor who were now much encreased in the City the principal cause whereof he alledged to be the King of Suedens abridging them in their priviledges contrary to his agreement made with them when they assisted him in his Wars as also that he had countenanced trade from and with the Hollanders and other Nations for a remedy whereof Woolweaver counselled them to endeavour to draw the Danes to joyn with the Lubeckers against all trading with Sueden from without the Baltick Sea But the Danes told them that they thought it not meet to conclude in things of that nature till they were better settled in their Government and were ageeed about the party that should be their King And finding it more necessary to keep good correspondence with Sueden because of the endeavours of a party amongst themselves to advance Christian to the Throne again they acquainted the King of Sueden with the designs of the Lubeckers Woolweaver stormed at this and without blushing faces about and propounds to the King of Sueden to joyn with him against the Hollanders But Gustavus his counsel was rather to manage well the matter concerning Denmark than to enter into new engagements For saith he the Danish affairs are as a Sea of many currents wherein if you steer not an even course and keep not constant watch you may be in danger of Shipwrack and therefore as imbarked in one and the same Ship with Denmark let us bend our whole counsel in the speedy settlement of the Government thereof so as may best conduce to the concurrent interest of both Nations Woolweaver finding himself thus disappointed in both these places grew angry and like one lifted up from below lifted up his thoughts higher than his wits served him and in his carere vaunteth that as he had advanced Gustavus to the Throne so he would pull him down again and thereupon entertained correspondency with the Runnegadoes of Sueden which Gustavus being quickly sensible of he seized upon the persons goods and priviledges of the Lubeckers in Sweden The Lubeckers also dealt in the like manner with the Suedes in Lubeck Wool-weaver in the mean time aiming at no less than the Crown of Sueden held private intelligence in Sueden and stirred them up to civil broils that might busie the King at home and first he prevailed with the Earle of Hoy who had married the Kings sister and being a person of great interest he prevailed with the people especially with those of Smalland to disaffect them towards the King which done the Earl withdraws himself his wife and children to Lubeck under pretâ—nce for his health sake but being there arrived he was made Commander in chief of all the disaffected Suedes who repaired unto him It s the usual fate of great men seldome to be contented with their present state they think that either their own merits are not rewarded enough or their inferiours too much and so through discontent striving to be higher they fall lower The Earle of Hoy thought it not enough to be the Kings brother by marriage and Lord Lieutenant under Gustavus in Sueden but he must become General of a party of discontents under Woolweaver against his King his brother his kindred and Country and what he gained thereby will afterwards appear In the mean time many retire to him out of Sueden principally by reason of the disturbances in Smalland which himself had kindled before his departure thence and which afterwards were fomented by a company of lawless persons who had combined themselves against the Kings Justices there and carried themselves with so high an hand that it came to blood even to the slaughter of the Kings Lieutenant in that Country and when the King had suppressed them by force of Arms yet they maintained a kinde of theevish War till they could retire themselves to the Earle of Hoy whose party being thus increased waited all advantages which occasioned the King of Sueden to stand rather upon his watch than upon his defence for they did him no harm God having provided other means to clip their wings without the labour of the King of Sueden For Woolweaver according to his design being strengthened by these aides soon imployed it about his principal work which was to settle his Neighbours the Danes in a fitting posture for his purpose For the present condition of Denmark was this The Nobles were divided as was said before about the election of a King divers were for John the son of the former King though a childe and that principally upon the
further happiness upon earth than to maintain what he had gotten yet was he once over-reached by the Livonians who proffered to commit themselves to his protection which he refused yet when they were much endangered by the Muscovites he sent aid unto them who engaging too far and the Livonians hanging behinde the whole burden was left upon the Suedes who finding the Muscovite too heavy for them and the Livonians heartless or faithless withdrew their assistance betimes and made their own peace It s a usual policy amongst Princes to be slow in advancing their eldest Sons who are to succeed them into places of Government and not without cause for in such cases especially in times and places of darkness their designed successours if well gifted by nature or education may prove heads of parties and factions and thereby put the present Governours to much trouble the one being looked upon as the rising the other but as the setting Sun Yet it seems more prejudicial to the people to have a raw and unexperienced Governour set over them who knows not how to govern himself And therefore if Ericus had been more experienced in Government he might have proved either more advised by the overruling direction of his Father or else he would have discovered himself so far as that he would never have been trusted and so many troubles might have been prevented which ensued afterwards But it is vain to call back things which are already past the time draws on a pace which must determine the work of this great King He had now governed the Kingdome of Sueden long and had seen many changes in other Nations as well as his own and yet must outlive one more in Denmark before he leaves the world For about this time died Christian the third King of Denmark by whose decease the Kingdome was put to the hazard of an other Election which concerned Sueden not a little for Christian the captive King was yet alive and had another fair opportunity to try the curtesie of the Lords of Denmark But they being unanimous for the choice of Frederick the Son of the Duke of Holst him they Crowned and Christian was still set aside Unhappy man that having lived a prisoner seven and twenty years in his own Nation could not in all that time by his carriage gain a better opinion amongst the Nobility of Denmark but that still he remained under the note of an impenitent and obstinate Tyrant It is the opinion of wise men that the breach between a King and his people is like the Divorce between a man and his wife never to be made up again and yet the difficulty lyes not in any determinate judgement or rule upon the Case as that of Divorce doth and therefore comes not within the compass of impossibility but in the distemper of the parties by ambition on the one side and jealousie on the other both hard to be cured yet the first leading the way to the second if that be first allayed the second may be cured And this Christian might have observed in the example of Carolus Canutus his corival in the Suedish Throne who having been Crowned King and fought successfully against the Danes and Norwegians ruled somewhat too imperiously for which he was ejected out of his Throne and yet afterwards being re-admitted he ruled in that manner that he dyed satisfied with honour and the love of his people But Christian was of another temper he would fain come again into the Government but not under restraint nor with submission nor by leave nor with the love of his Nation but still depending upon a forreign interest and the power of the Emperour he was looked upon as an enemy and his return as that of the unclean spirit that would render the latter condition of the Nation sevenfold worse than the former For he that is a King indeed though wrongfully rejected will still bear the minde of a King to desire the peoples good and will endeavour to deserve their love But he that depends upon the forreign interest of such as are professed enemies to a peoples Religion and Liberties disowneth interest in his people and therefore cannot rationally expect any re-acceptance if that Nations Religion be right either by the leave of God or liking of the people Now whether Christian took conceit at this Election seeing no hope of ever gaining a better condition than for the present he was in Writers mention not but he dyed presently after even within one moneth of the death of Christian the third and in the Seventy eight year of his age And Gustavus out-lived him and all these changes well-nigh two years seeing his people in a settled condition for Justice Religion and Peace amongst themselves and with all their Neighbours thriving in Trade industrious in Husbandry Skilfull in improving the benefit of their Mines Potent both at Sea and Land and himself blessed with repute and honour both from his own people and strangers Successfull in all his affairs and leaving a numerous posterity behind him And having lived seventy years and thereof raigned thirty eight years he gave in charge to his children to endeavour the peace and to maintain the liberties of their Country but especially to preserve the purity of Religion without the mixture of humane inventions and to live as brethren in unity among themselves All which also he left as a memorial â—ealed up in his last Will and so he resigned up his spirit to God Anno Christi 1562. So lived Gustavus or Augustus for the name is the same which perhaps minding him of imitation made him exceed his patern His aims out reached the Roman Empire and were higher than the world His difficulties and dangers greater His enemies more desperate by conjuncture of the Devils His labour and industry not unlike His success beyond all even to wonderment If he came short of Austustus in his time of Government wherein the difference was not much yet he exceeded him in the manner It being with such an excellent temper of Monarchy with popularity He preserved the peoples liberty with the honour of a King and common security without pride of Tyranny The people living as well under the King without servitude as in a popular estate without sedition and yet he attempered all with just liberty of conscience and the true worship and service of God which he owned as the chief Diamond in his Crown and conveyed all to his successours by a better and more enduring settlement than Augustus did or could attain unto His worst enemies never publickly taxed him with any crime but covetousness And Thuanus a Writer of credit in those times gives no countenance thereto Nor did the Patrimony left by him to his children hold forth any such thing and therefore if any such thing were it was for the service of the state of Sueden wherein if he spared not others it s confessed by all that he spared not
36. that then every man shall be judged Jude 15. and every secret thing shall be brought to light Rom. 2. 16. and that the judgement will be most just and so confessed by all Rom. 2. 5 6. why then should I fear the last Judgement seeing he shall be my Judge who is my Brother Advocate and Redeemer He that was willingly judged for me will give no hard sentence against me yea he hath already absolved me from my sins and given me the earnest of his Spirit and the seal of the Sacraments and I have judged my self that I may not be condemned with the world 1 Cor. 11. 32. I do beleeve that the glory of Heaven is unspeakable and incomprehensible by us here on earth 1 Cor. 2. 9. that is it eternal Matth. 25. 45. and that it is the gift of God proceeding onely from his free Grace not our merit Luke 12. 32. his free gift bestowed onely upon the Elect Rev. 21. 27. O that I could by the effectualness of contemplation behold the greatness of this felicity which is provided for me yet as I can conceive it I cannot choose but long to be absent from hence that I may be present with the Lord 2 Cor. 5. 8. whos 's admirable beauty I shall clearly see and know as I am known and that with a perfection both of holiness and happiness such holiness as will not onely free me from all sin but from all possibility of sinning such happiness as that ceasing from all labour and sorrow I shall enjoy an eternal Sabbath and shall be free to all the treasures of Heaven and with the fruition of Gods glorious presence shall enjoy the sweet society of all the glorified Saints and Angels And all this as it is unuterable so it is unalterable For as I cannot be disappointed of it because it is certain so I cannot be deprived of it because it is eternal How then should the hope of the future life but swallow up the afflictions of the life present and why should I fear Death when being dead I shall be so blessed Yet was not her Faith elevated so high but that she could readily apply it to promises of an inferiour degree For as she trusted in God at all times as David teacheth Psal. 62. 8. so did she in all things whether temporal or eternal In straits and difficulties for the affairs of this life she had that ready at hand Commit thy way unto the Lord trust also in him and he shall bring it to pass Psal. 37. 5. If at any time she was sinisterly censured by any one her faith applied that promise to her heart He shall bring forth thy righteousness as the light and thy judgement as the noon day Psal. 35. 6. And whatsoever it were that came upon her as a cross her faith was either as a wreathe betwixt her shoulders and it that it did not pinch her or a remover of it from her self to him who was best able to bear it by vertue of that Warrant Psal. 55. 22. Cast thy burthen upon the Lord and he shall sustain thee and that done her faith which teacheth to keep an eaven pace with the promises not making haste Isa. 28. 16. by anticipating the time of accomplishment taught her soul to wait upon God as Davids did Psal. 62. 1. to effect his own work at his own time in his own way and manner wherein she would not prescribe any thing at all By this daily exercise of her Faith she gained a great deal of freedome and lightsomness of spirit which admirably appeared in her deportment upon great disappointments of that which was her own due and unexpected payments unto others when she hath seen no way of supply for the present occasions she hath believed that Gods providence would effect what her forecast could not when she was not wanting in the use of means and that he could furnish her with that which should be sufficient albeit for the present she saw not how nor by what means it would come to pass and therefore when she had done what belonged to her duty in the affiance of her Faith she rested quiet and remained cheerful and slept neither the less nor the worse for it and that which confirmed her confidence the more was that she still found by experience that God was most worthy to be trusted That her Faith was as good as it was great appeared by the effect of it in her Devotion and Piety which was suitable to her knowledge of God and her faith in him by both which as she had a clear apprehension of him so none had more dear and devout affections to him or more assured signs of such than she as appeared in these particulars She was frequently and fervently conversant with God besides the publick in her private supplications and therein was he most favourably familiar with her for he sent forth his Spirit into her heart whereby she cried Abba Father Gal 4. 6. The Spirit of Grace and Supplication Zach. 12. 10. which enabled her in an extraordinary manner and measure to pour out her soul into his bosome and though she duely esteemed of the solemn prayers of the sacred Assemblies whereof a learned and pious Divine said that never any one prayed well privately who contemned or neglected the publick prayers of the Church and never sleighted or censured set forms of Prayer yet could she and that excellently well conceive Prayer and vary her Petitions as the present occasion did require Yea in this Devotion she was so abundant in apt and pertinent expressions that indeed it was admirable that one so silent in her common conversation with the world should be so fluent and eloquent in her entercourse with God Nor was she more copious in speech than fervent in spirit For such was her holy violence in Prayer as that she seemed not to knock at Heaven Gate for another to open it but to make a battery upon it her self and to break in by the powerful importunity of her supplications Her service also of God in this kinde was no dry Devotion but steeped and drenched in showres of tears and though her prudence used as much privacy as might be herein yet such a singular gift could not be hid from her servants and some secret female friends who sometimes when they were sick or possessed with fears or pains of child-birth they would move her with importunity to pray with them and when she yeelded to them and God to her by answering her request they were apt as there was cause to impute the good effect to her fervent supplications A female friend of hers who was her bed-fellow in London for many weeks together and thereby was a partaker of her daily Devotions professed that she was so plentifully furnished for utterance of her requests to God that she never wanted variety of meet words to be presented unto him but when a surcharge of sighs and
tears put her Prayers to a pause When the heart is full of love the mouth is filled with praise of a person most deservedly and most dearly beloved whereof we have an example in this vertuous Gentlewoman who when time company and occasion did invite her to communicate to others the good matter which her heart had indited of God she used her Tongue as the pen of a ready writer Psal. 45. 1. And when she had that great King for the subject of her speech she spake of him with such hearty and savoury relishes of sacred delight and reverence and with such an affectionate force as if her soul were ready to leap out at her lips into the ears of others to kindle the same holy fire in their hearts who heard her which burned in her own bosome longing as David did that others might taste and see the goodnâ—ss of the Lord Psal. 34. 8. that they might be Rivals with her in her Religious love and glad she was when any sinner was converted or any already called better enabled to promote the glory of God and that was the end which she principally aimed at in her godly discourse of him In giving vent to her heart in this duty she could spend her spirits with great delight both to her self and to those choice friends who had opportunity to hear her when just occasion was ministred unto her and yet when she had spoken best she found matter of complaint in her own expressions as being too faint and too flat and so far below that which was meet for the Majesty of the great God insomuch as all the acceptation which she desired of him was but to pardon her presumption as the errour of her love for taking upon her to speak of his Excellency and the weakness of her spirit and speech which made her fall infinitely short of doing him right in the publication of his praise Another evidence of her dear affection unto God was the great love which for his sake she bore to whom or whatsoever had any near relation to him according to that 1 Joh. 4. 21. He that loves God must love his brother also and he must love him rather in a direct than in a collateral line as Gods childe rather than as his brother more for Gods sake than for his own The dearest degree of love belongs to those persons and things which are nearest to him and to such she bore a sincere and singular good will As to his Saints with David Psal. 16. 3. and to his true Religion and worship both at home and abroad the happy progress and prosperity whereof was with her as Jerusalem with David preferred above her chiefest joy Psal. 137. 6. and it was a great affliction to her heart to hear any ill tidings of any good man or any good cause She highly prized Gods word and in the blessed Sacrament of the Lords Supper she felt such a sweet refreshing as might make amends for the severity of her frequent fasting so that for her part and portion of it in respect of the common sort of Communicants she might say I have meat that ye know not of Joh. 4. 32. Dainties which infinitely exceed whatsoever delighteth or pleaseth a sensual pallate For the house of God she shewed her self just of Davids minde when she said I have loved the habitation of thy house the place where thine honour dwelleth Psal. 26. 8. and How amiable are thy Tabernacles O Lord of Hosts my soul longeth yea even fainteth for the Courts of the Lord Psal. 84. 1 2. If by any imperious impediment she were kept from the Church as by sickness in her body c. her soul was love-sick by her longings to be there and whereas many women take a little occasion to absent themselves from it she would many times force her feeble body to carry her soul to the Sanctuary though the day before she were confined not only to her chamber but to her bed whereby though she hazarded her health yet it pleased God so graciously to accept of her zeal to his House that she was never the worse for those pious adventures She kept a great distance from doting on the world which St. James condemns as enmity to God Jam. 4. 4. Though while she lived she could not choose but be in the world yet did she so love her dear Lord Jesus Christ that for his sake she was exceedingly estranged from the world which appeared 1. By her estrangement from sensual delights which she shewed by her frequent fasting from meats and drinks By her abstinence from such sports and pastimes as before her conversion she had been too immoderately addicted unto and by her fiâ—m resolution to forbear Marriage after her widowhood and to rest in that condition wherein she might best attend upon the service of God Indeed her love and delight in communion with God made her mindeless of meat and careless of provision for the flesh Well she knew that though fasting makes the body weak as David saith My knees are weak through fasting and my flesh faileth of fatness Psal. 109. 20. yet it strengthneth the spirit and maketh it vigorous in conflict and victorious in the event yea fasting and prayer make a potent combination which is able to drive the strongest Devil out of his usurped possession as Matth. 17. 21. These two she used not onely as weapons against the Devil but as wings to elevate her soul God-ward and heaven-ward yet herein was she observant of our Saviours rule Mat. 17. 18. that she fasted without an appearance of fasting onely the next day it might be discerned by her faintness she having spent her spirits in spiritual exercises the day before For those sports and pastimes wherein formerly she had taken too much contentment she not onely abstained from them but much complained of her vanity in them Her eyes which before were used to behold them with delight now shed tears of shame and sorrow that formerly she had set her minde so much upon them and now she imployed them in the more frequent and affectionate reading of the holy Scriptures wherein she took more delight than she had done before in the most pompous Spectacles set out to take the eyes with gazing and the minde with wonder And as for Marriage her heart was so devoted to her Lord Christ that though she had divers fair invitations to it by such as both for profit and credit and other considerable respects were worthy rather to be desired than denied yet she resolved not to change her condition in that kinde and that not onely in love and loyalty to her former Husband but that she might be more free to serve God according to that of St. Paul 1 Cor. 7. 34. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord that she may be holy both in body and spirit but she that is married careth for the things
good and a charitable neighbour and a true and constant friend Towards her latter end she fell into some bodily distempers wherein she had fits or trances like the embrions of death which by a gradual failing of her spirits left her at last unable to speak or move yet without any great alteration in her countenance which by some was conceived to be a spice of the Mother it was short and not sharp for she felt no pain yet when she returned to her self she found that she was commonly more feeble than before Upon the Munaay sevenight before she dyed was the first assault given which set Deaths pale colour upon her face and fingers from the middle joynts towards the ends her nails turned to a blewish black which being rubbed a while returned again to their former complexion and she remained that night indifferent well the next day her disease appeared in the form and quality of a kindely ague and so continued mostly tâ—ll within three or four daies before her end then it turned from an intermitting Ague to a continual Feaver that afflicted her with extream burning and other pains which commonly accompany such a disease especially when it rageth most as it doth towards the latter end During her sickness having the free use of all her faculties her soul no doubt was exercised in holy meditations for whâ—h she had kept in store many particulars of importance to be remembred at her departure out of this world Her desires were strong for a speedy dissolution so that she implored God with the request of David Psal. 38. 22. Make haste to help me O Lord my salvation and Psal. 40. 13. Be pleased O Lord to deliver me O Lord make haste to help me And this she desired that she might have a joyful meeting with him and fruition of him after whom her soul longed even then when her life was most lightsome and her condition most comfortable And now the time drew near that her desire was to be granted in that kinde which she most desired by the power of death to pass to the Authour of life which she did in such a calm manner that when she was thought to be but asleep she was found to be dead on Friday August the 17. Anno Christi 1638. The Life and Death of Mr. Ignatius Jurdaine who dyed Anno Christi 1640. IGnatius Jurdaine was born at Lime-Regis in the County of Dorset Anno Christi 1561. And when he was yet young he was sent by his Friends to the City of Exeter to be brought up in the profession of a Merchant and from thence being about fifteen years old he was sent into the Isle of Garnsey and God by his good providence having brought him to that place did also there effectually call and convert him by his Grace So that from that time he resolved to be like that wise Merchant in the Gospel Mat. 13. 46. to part with all for that Pearl of great price whereas others did make it their great work and highest design to get the pelf of the world and to load themselves with thick clay Hab. 2. 6. And in testimony of his thankfulness to God he left by Will a considerable Legacy to the poor of Lime where he was born and to the poor of Garnsey where he was new born God seasoning his heart with Grace in his younger years the general course of his life did for the future relish of it according to that of Solomon Prov. 22. 6. Train up a childe in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it For as he was trained up in Religion from his youth so he continued not only in the form and profession but in the life and power of it until his old age and death In the whole tenour of his life his piety was most eminent and indeed there have been few observed to hold such constâ—nt and close communion with God as Mr. Jurdaine did It was his constant practice for many years together even to his old age to arise between two and three of the clock in the morning and that even in the coldest seasons of the year and to spend the time in secret meditation and prayer until six a clock which was the appointed time for his Morning-sacrifice in the Family at which time he was called from his secret devotions to the exercise of Religious Family-duties And if at any time he had over-slept himself as he accounted it and did not rise until four a clock he would much bemoan himself for the loss of so much precious time wherein he might have enjoyed sweet and comfortable communion with God Surely had he not experimentally found much sweetness in this his spiritual converse with God as David did Psal. 104. 34. he could not have continued so constantly therein And having thus awaked with God in the morning and renewed his acquaintance with him day by day it s no marvel that he did walk with him all the day long after In all his affairs and dealings his care was to walk very exactly and sincerely according to St. Pauls direction Eph. 5. 16. But though in all things he studied to approve himself to God and to walk as in the sight of God 2 Cor. 2. 17. yet could he not escape the malicious censures of men who charged him to do all in Hypocrisie He well knew that he had the imputations of dissembling and hypocrisie cast upon him by men void of charity and sincerity but the testimony of his own conscience did more comfort him than the uncharitable censures of men dejected him and he used upon that occasion to take up the words of Job Till I dye I will not remove mine integrity from me Job 27. 5. Many have oft heard him to profess that he would not willingly commit a sin to get a world though the evil which he would not do that did he as Rom. 7. 25. as it is incident to the best of men yet did he bewail it with grief of heart The sincerity indeed both of his intentions and actions hath been questioned by some who were not ashamed to say that under colour of doing Justice when he was a publick Magistrate and providing for poor he robbed the poor and helpt to keep his own house which was due to the poor But for that falshood that was thus charged upon him there were none that could ever better clear him from it than himself not onely his conscience witnessing for him before God but his books wherein he kept an exact Record of all the money which he received by way of mulct from Swearers Drunkards c. according to the Law and the Officers that distributed the money testifying his integrity before men so that might truly say with Jacob Gen. 30. 33. My righteousness shall answer for me and so it did herein both before God and men Nay he was so far from depriving
the poor of their right that he added much of his own distributing sixpences and shillings even when he had no money in bank He had not onely the testimony of his own conscience and of good men for his upright and just dealing but even of such who had little goodness in them A prophane Gentleman jeeâ—ing at his heavenly discourses another of good quality though of little piety replyed Well Gentlemen you may laugh at him but on my conscience he meaneth well and whosoever of us goeth to Heaven shall meet Mr. Jurdaine there He was a man that made conscience of all the duties and exercises of Religion both in private and in publick His frequent discourses of Heaven and the way thereunto and assurance of his interest therein did declare that his heart and conversation were much in Heaven He used 〈◊〉 take occasion to confer of spiritual and heavenly things with all sorts of men that he conversed with One should seldome hear him speak but of heaven and heavenly things His heart was so full of heaven that he could not but utter and breath it forth in his discourses with men and especially with those whose hearts and faces were towards Heaven When he was at Table receiving his dayly food he did usually minister occasion of holy discourses and diverted vain and unprofitable talk to such edifying speeches as might minister grace to the hearers according to that exhortation Eph. 4. 29. He took occasion from earthly things to speak of heavenly as from the sweetness of the creatures to speak of the infinite sweetness which is in God from feasting on earth to the sitting down with Abraham Isaac and Jacob in the Kingdome of heaven Matth. 8. 11. and feasting with God and his blessed Saints there And when the Table-cloath was taken away he would often say In heaven there is no taking away here we are soon satisfied and cloyed but there will be such a feast that we shall be continually delighting our souls with it without any cloying And his manner was to close his meals with singing some short Psalm He delighted much in reading good and holy books and especially that Book of books the sacred Scriptures wherein he most delighted and thereby shewed that he had the property of a godly man set down Psal. 1. 2. 119. 97. The word of God was his meditation all the day long yea both day and night He did not onely read the Bible above twenty times over but he read it with special observation as appeareth by the Asterisks and marks in the Bible which he used making particular application to himself The like course he took in reading over that usefull Book of Mr. Rogers his seven Treatises and other practical books wherein he was very conversant and his collections out of several Authours do abundantly testifie And he took so much delight in reading that voluminous and excellent Book of the Acts and Monuments of the Church that upon occasion he told a Friend that he had read it seven times over His zeal for God and his glory and against Idolatry prophaneness and other evils whereby God was highly dishonoured was most eminent and remarkable He was a man of an Anti-Laodician temper he had well learned the Apostles direction Rom. 12. 11. To be fervent in spirit serving the Lord and not the time He was far unlike Ignatius Loiola the Founder of the Order of Jesuits who was a man of fire that was set on fire by â—ell to promote the cause of the Prince of darkness but he had an holy fire kindled in his heart from heaven whereby he did burn with zeal for the advancement of Gods glory and an holy indignation against sin and errour He would if it had been possible have burnt up all the dross and fiâ—th that corrupted the Truths of God and that was contrary to the wayes of holiness and therein he was very like to Ignatius the Martyr Neither did his zeal carry him beyond knowledge like that of the Jews Rom. 10. 2. when in his zeal he used often to cry out Fie upon discretion For he condemned only that counterfeit pretence of discretion which was taken up and pleaded against true and regular zeal And truly if carnal discretion be set up and cried up like the worldlings Idol it is the part of true Christian zeal to cry it down He was a very strict and conscientious observer and sanctifier of the Christian Sabbath or Lords Day He did then rise very early as on other dayes if not earlier and called upon those in his Family to rise early on that day saying This is Gods day and as we do expect that our servants should rise early to go about our work on our dayes so God expects our early rising on his Day to go about his work and service And he used carefully to attend upon Gods holy Ordinances The feet of them that dispenced the Gospel were beautiful in his eyes as Rom. 10. 15. more beautiful than their faces to many others He was one of those Saints that sate down at Gods feet to receive his word Deut. 33. 3. as Disciples used at the feet of their Teacher implied Act. 22. 3. and he was very desirous and willing to learn of any that came with the Lords message unto him He was a Mâ—ason an old Disciples Act. 21. 16. yea a Disciple when he was old It never came into his heart to cast off Ordinances no not when he had attained to an high measure towards perfection He was a constant writer of Sermons even when he was old and that not for his own benefit alone but for the good of his Family to whom he did constantly repeat the Sermons And if he found himself overtaken with drowsiness in hearing the word an infirmity incident to age his manner was to stand up and to rouse up himself that he might hear the more attentively He knew that Religion consisted not in hearing repetition and profession but in practice and therefore his care was to digest his hearing and knowledge into an holy conversation His love was so great to the Ministry of the word and the Lords holy Ordinances that he did intirely love and affect all faithfull and painfull Ministers though their gifts were but mean but he could not away with a lazie Ministâ—r though he was never so learned Where fidelity and learning meet together in one Minister Oh! how highly would he reverence him And being desirous not to go to Heaven alone but to draw others with him his usuall course was when he went with his Family to Gods house to make an exhortation to his children and servants that they should consider into whose presence they were going and whom they were to hear even that great God to whom they were to give an account of every word which they should hear and therefore he required them carefully to store it up for their practice and
his Court when he came after divers good admonitions given him he told him that though he was never so great a Gentleman he could no more go to Heaven whilest he took such courses than he could eat that stone pointing to a great stone in his Court and then required him to pay five shillings for his Oaths which he did Then he told him that he must put in sureties for the good behaviour This the Gentleman refused to do alleadging that he was a stranger Whereupon Mr. Jurdainâ— commanded the Constables to carry him away to prison till he would find sureties which accordingly they did and as he was going into the prison door he desired that he might return back again and he would give Bail When he came to Mr. Jurdainâ— to do it he again gave him many good instructions and the Gentleman though he was a man of a very high spirit gave him many hearty thanks for his good counsell and promised amendment for the time to come The Master of Bridewell could witness how many disorderly persons were sent thither by Mr. Jurdains Warrants more than by any other Justices in his time The Stocks and Whipping-post could testifie what swearers drunkards unclean persons and such like notorious offendors were punished principally by his indifferent execution of justice And if any of the offenders that were liable to the censure and penalty of the Law desired to be spared he would tell them Here be my children whom I dearly love and yet if any of them should commit such offences they should suffer as you must do and therefore I cannot remit of the penalty of the Law What excuses or fair pretences soever they made he caused the Law to be executed upon them yea and that the more severely because of the greatness of the crime and the greater dishonour that redounded to the Name of the most high God thereby When some scandalous offenders for the gross sin of uncleanness were accused and questioned before the Court and some present for by-respects pleaded for them desiring to have them spared he wished the Watchmen that were at the Gates to keep out the Plague it being a time wherein some neighbour-Towns were infected should be called home For saith he the Plague is in the Guild-Hall of the City Adding further that if they did not execute the Law upon them he would complain of them to the Council Table And thereupon after much contest there was Order taken for their severe and just punishment He was ever very vigilant especially in the year of his Mayoralty when the government of the City lay upon him both to prevent and remove disorders Insomuch as he would go himself with the Constables to search for idle and disorderly persons on Sabbath dayes at night and at the end of the Assizes and Sessions and in Fair weeks c. Yea he did not only execute justice but he shewed himself zealous therein manifesting the greatest indignation against those evils whereby God was most highly dishonoured as swearing and Sabbath-breaking Indeed swearing was most odious unto him and had there been a greater penalty than was at that time appointed by the Law of the Land he would most readily have inflicted it But by his punishing as many as were brought before him it struck such an awe into the generality as that some that lived at that time in the City and near the place of the greatest concourse of people the Corn-market observed that they did not hear an Oath sworn for many years together He did not only maintain his zeal against swearing and swearers of the ordinary sort and rank of men but even of the highest that came within the verge of his authority As for example A Gentleman of great quality and much favoured at Court was heard to swear five or six times in the City Mr. Jurdaine having notice of it sent some Constables to demand the penalty for swearing The Gentleman was of an high spirit and at this time accompanied with the chiefest of the County of Devonshire and there were divers hot spirits about him The Constables pressed towards the room where he was saying that Mr. Jurdaine had sent them to demand the aforementioned penalty and it was like to have broken forth into a great and dangerous contest but a prudent Gentleman of a more moderate temper and one that feared an Oath stepped forth to them and told the Constables that this Gentleman was of an high and impatient spirit and had great company about him I fear therefore said he that the event may be of sad consequence if you pursue your intentions at this time yet the Constables seemed unwilling to depart till they had what they came for the Gentleman seeing this said I will now pay the six shillings to you for him and I promise you faithfully that I will take a convenient time to admonish the Knight when it shall do him more good than the rigorous exaction of the penalty of the Law can at this time and so they departed It is credibly related that Mr. Jurdaine being summoned to appear in the Star-chamber for an act of Justice wherein it was supposed that he went somewhat beyond the strict letter of the Law being there in the presence of some of his Judges who were Noble men and hearing them to swear divers Oaths he told them that they must pay for every oath that they had sworn or otherwise he would make it farther known When he was Mayor of Exeter he did much reform the open prophanation of the Sabbaths For whereas the Hullers had wont to set their Mills agoing on the Sabbaths he put a stop upon them for that whole day knowing that that whole day was to be dedicated to God and his worship and service and whereas it was usuall to sell fruit and herbs and other things on the Lords holy day as also Bowling Cudgel-playing and other prophane pastimes were then much used by his zeal and vigilancy and by the care of other Officers under him they were wholly left off though not without much reluctancy opposition and some danger at the first for there were commotions and tumults and great resistance made against him but by his constant zeal for God and his day and Gods blessing upon the same they were at last suppressed and quelled And not onely when he was Mayor but ever after being a Justice of Peace in which Office he continued for twenty and four years he was much taken up in the execution of Justice yea sometimes for the whole day from morning till night So that he did not onely execute Judgement in the morning as Jer. 21. 12. after he had been with God in the Mount of heavenly meditation but all the day long as Moses sate to judge the people and the people stood before Moses from the morning untill the evening Exod. 18. 13. And when he was out of power as a Justice he discovered his
the godly and the miserable condition of the wicked in their death and so for ever unto all eternity it pleased the Lord so much to affect my heart with it as from that time my heart was wrought over to a desire to walk in the wayes of God But at that time I fear I did not go upon a right principle for I then did not eye the glory of God in it but only my own safety that it might be well with me for ever But quickly after that I had but begun to set my face towards Sion I was set upon with many temptations and perplexities in my thoughts which were very troublesome to me at all times but especially when I was alone the consideration whereof brought such an horrour upon my conscience insomuch as I did not know what to do That little I had whether from education or from the light of Nature caused a striving in me continually against those thoughts of Atheisme which were most terrible unto me I was sensible that it was a fearfull sin to have any such thoughts to lodge within my brest but I desired from my soul to be freed from them and had continuall reasonings within me against them and yet still for a long time I was troubled but could not acquaint any with my condition I did not think that it was so with any other as it was with me In this strait when I knew not which way to turn me even there did the Lord extend his compassion towards me in my greatest extremity in directing me to read Calvins Institutions and especially that part that treats of the Creation Whereupon the Lord was pleased to give in such satisfaction to my soul concerning those things about which I was troubled as that from that time forwards I was not violently assaulted in that kind But no sooner was I freed from that trouble but new ones sprang up For the very remembrance of that horrid sin of Atheisme left such a terrour upon my spirit as made me fear that I had committed that sin against the Holy Ghost and so my condition seemed to be not only for the present but in my apprehension then for ever most miserable All other sins though never so great I knew upon true repentance were pardonable but this sin that I lay under the fear of I knew out of the Word of God should never be pardoned which caused many sad fears upon my spirit known to God alone For the removall of these fears the Lord in mercy directed me to the reading of Mr. Scudders Works where are laid down the marks of that sin Upon perusall whereof the Lord was pleased to satisfie my misgiving heart by a clear manifestation to my soul that I had not committed that sin and so assured me that though my sins were great yet were they pardonable which put me more chearfully upon the use of such means as the Lord had directed me unto And having satisfaction given in concerning this particular there was a great burden taken off from my spirit Although I found no grace in my heart nor discovery of the love of God unto my soul yet in that there was but a possibility there was a ground of comfort administred to my heart which I formerly feared that I should be shut out from But still my fears remained that I was not one of those in particular for whom Christ died The more I looked into mine own heart the more I saw of sin and Satan discouraging me from having any hope that the Lord should accept of such a vile sinfull wretch as I was who had entertained such sinfull thoughts I likewise thought how small the number was of those that should be saved in comparison of others and my repentance I feared came short of that which was required in the Gospel As for faith I could not find the least measure of it in my soul with many other sad discouraging thoughts But when I was most perplexed with fears and doubts even then did the Lord graciously dart in some beams of his reconciled countenance as I was reading something in Mr. Scudders Christian daily Walk c. which the Lord set home upon my soul and brought into my soul so much joy and comfort at the present as neither my tongue nor Pen can express But this joy remained not long for I quickly lost the sense of it yet the remembrance of it was sweet unto me at all times But after this all my former fears returned afresh again upon my heart only I had a door of hope opened that when God saw it best for me he would return and renew his reconciled countenance unto my soul in the clear light and apprehension thereof and this was when I was about sixteen years of age After which time the Lord did exercise me with various dispensations For for two years space I was by providence cast upon a place where I heard very little powerfull preaching small helps for the good of my soul but what the Lord was pleased to give in by the use of private means But his power and abundant mercy was much seen in that time that though I had not much comfort yet the Lord was pleased to keep up my spirit in a way of depending upon him and my fears were less at that time than formerly when I had more helps So gracious was tâ—â— Lord unto me in keeping me alive in a time of famine After this through Gods goodness I was sometimes under the preaching of a powerfull Minister Mr. Bateman of Ockingam who was Crowned with the conversion strengthening and building up of many souls unto whose preaching the Lord gave me such a blessing as I seldome if ever went away from hearing him without comfort Though I came to hear him with many doubts upon my spirit yet the Lord so ruled and directed him as if his Sermons had been only concerning my particular and he fully acquainted with the whole condition of my soul. Sometimes the Lord directed me to some supporting Promises upon which I relied But those Promises which were made to Believers though I highly prized them yet I durst not apply them to my self fearing that I had no interest in them But that Promise Prov. 28. 13. He that confesseth and forsaketh his sins shall find mercy And that 1 Joh. 1. 9. If we confess our sins he is faithfull and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness And the Promise is 1 Joh. 2. 1 2. If any man sin we have an Advocate with the Father Jesus Christ the Righteous and he is the propitiation for our sins and not for ours onely but for the sins of the whole world and the Invitation Isa. 55. 1. Ho every one that thirsteth come ye to the waters and he that hath no money come ye buy and eat yea come buy wine and milk without money and without price together with