extinguish our devouring flames Professions and pretences have beene hitherto on all sides not unfaire O that they may be so contained And now you also on each side our soule and State Physitians looke upon God his truth and publique peace more then your passions selfe interest and policie streâ—ch not your strings too high trust God with the blessing his owne Truth and Oracles feare not the consequence of a truely orthodox assertion may truth and peace bee ever as well your object as pretence faire uniforme harmonious reformed discipline order and government your prudentiall and Christian ayme maintaine our foundations as entire and unshaken as an orderly candid well intended edifice will admit else may you pervert and destroy what you are bound to assert and maintaine Nor will I pretermit you Stars of the greater and lesser magnitude in the Oxford Firmament whose ennobled blood birth station constitute you Patrons and supporters of your Countreys preservation and welfare whose predecessors and progenitors are glorious in the Registers of time as happy advancers and dilaters of the English possessions name and honour Suffer not now our Annals to disgrace your name and memory as the impulsive active Engins to our Kings and Countreys lugubrious irreparable losse commiserate the sighs and groanes of our gasping exspiring defaced Nation Search home into the disguised caâ—ses and Authors of yours and our miseries undeceive disabuse your selves dispell the mists of your distemper'd bewildred spirits and lend at last a hand to save and rescue to stanch and cure our letiferous wounds Let no Roman recorded eterniz'd examples devoted as a willing ambitious sacifice for their Countries deliverance and redemption diffame you in what you owe and to procure can hardly over-doe or suffer Infinite matter you may discover would here offer and suggest it selfe the times require but will not well comport with ingenuitie much for caution much for cure might bee exhibited I have met with conjunctures to have been often versed and engaged in deliberations obnoxious and captious nor have proved my selfe destitute of some abilitie to tread by a line and cut by a thread I am at this instant not unfurnisht of a plentifull Magazin of specious flattering materialls for the present occasion somewhat I had conceived not impertinent to have farther alleaged for my selfe I silence and passe by all confining my selfe to what impremeditately falls and flowes upon my paper my wonted diffusive confusion would fit these troubled distracted times but I will containe if my lines have a propitious Genius though unhappily I have as much despaired as affected to bee able to serve my generation either alive or dead I may possibly with my little erudition prove an illiterate Author of some small fruite and edification at least to the seeking faire industrious mind such is my prayer such my desire How neere my end of writing of abilitie to comply with publique dutie and my lives period concurre I know not The disorder of the times consumes our fortunes and spirits consternates devasts and plunders our soules and consciences I have a long time conceived ordinary taken Oathes especially when multiforme of great and evill consequence and little effect Oathes of course as I was wont to say are coursly observed they passe at length insensibly they cauterize the vulgar they often ensnare when considered like over-iterated frequent Physick they lose their operation as well the tender conscientious as the libertine impatient finding themselves pent and constrained to disentangle they counterworke and perforate them like Sampson they breake their uneasie bands and by a depraved consecution carelessely sleight them letting out their soules to a subsequent dissolution and corruption Warre and custome turne blood and crueltie to nature necessitie of imposing and rigorous coertion render us incompassionate Yet however hee may appeare the honest good Chirurgion being by the inconsiderate ignorant unjustly censured of crueltie and hard-heartednesse by his incisions and other necessary operations of art will to the better judgements stand justified as having acted onely towards cure preservation health and recovery May it please God to overrule and rectifie our hearts blessing us in maintaining our Fundamentals of Faith Hope and Charitie and mee in supporting my selfe by faire and necessary subterfuges and diversions I am no Cabalist one of the open none of the closer Counsells I am neither wise nor good enough yet as the Scripture mentions of the over-wise and over-just am left alone to my solitary unjunctoed selfe my fate not my affections or lazinesse may bee the cause I confesse some unsutablenesse may bee in mee by my default and curiositie making mee in businesse more troublesome and lesse ductile and tractable then ordinary my mind is also too sofâ— and smooth for the questionablenesse anxietie obliquities hardnesse and roughnesse of the present I am naturally active yet daintie and scrupulous of resolutions and undertakings What shall I doe Stirring Spirits must be fomented if I finde no hope of doing good abroad if no evasion I will in all events endevour to make use of my experience to subsist not injurying my self within my self at home I have scarcely to this day become instructed how to forbeare to oppresse how to favour be charitable to and honestly indulge my self but am in a much cleerer light for my guide then formerly and even now which you see is hard for me to do to make use of it I most humbly implore the Grace and Mercy of the Omnipotent upon this disconsolate afflicted deplorate world and me and end Amen March 10. 1644. Un peu de tout Rien come il fault a la Francoise Chorus MAnkind cruell to thy self No beast of prey comes neer to thee Thou need'st no other Rock or Shelf For Shipwrack then thy cruelty Wolves thou destroyedst more wolf then they They never prey upon their kind Nor joy to kill and to betray Where faire subsistence they might finde Wolves in Sheeps cloathing are the worst Poore Sheep that with such Shepherds meet Our sins doe make us thus accurst Ensowring all that would bee sweet No warning nor forbearance could On our obdurate Soules prevaile Wee still doe all but what wee should Our fatall sufferings to entaile Bee wise at last by your own cost Exempt your selves from common scorn Else King and People all is lost All into blood and peeces torn God and your Neighbour take to heart God alone can help impart IF you are a Formalist one who does Stupere in Titulis Imaginibusque here is scarcely so much as a tittle for you exercise your severity somewhere else this doth neither invite nor defie you Master of it self and its own entertainment It rather forbids you as an unwelcome guest Non omnibus dormit what most by chance and something by designe as most things goe the most important peeces carry their Date you must accordingly distinguish the times like me they are no temporizers neither affectedly precisely following nor over Monsterlike
For future times a pattern most exact Faire Ship most fairly fraught for VVar and Peace Untimely sunk scarce launcht into the seas Too glorious rising Sunne soon overcast That shin'st in Heaven for here thy beames were plac't On mould too dull cold worthlesse to beget An active fruitfulnesse answering thy heat Thy flames of vertue were more pure and high Then our weake state could foment with supply No vertue didst thou want or vice possesse That could make great thy worth or glory lesse Furnish't with all materials fit to raise A high superlative of Princely praise A true Minervian issue sprung from Iove Visible vertue forcing us to love As true a vertuous Cyrus naturall As Xenophons fain'd artificiall Faire fire receiv'd as from our Persian King Dead vertue once againe to life to bring Heroick off-spring of that English blood VVhich anciently hath so celebrous stood As faire a splendor to thy Fathers stem As or his Scepter Throne or Diadem If Troy lamented Hector Grecians scourge â—arre greater grief thy death to us doth urge Troy miss'd no Captaines though their Hector dead But whom hath now our Priam fit to lead VVith union and alacrity the Bands Of English Scottish Welsh and Irish Lands VVhose active well born spirits thirsted all To follow such a hopefull Generall VVhose pattern set the coldest mindes on fire VVith glorious thoughts and generous desire Sole able Engine t' have repair'd the fame Of th' once illustrious wither'd English name Such vertue could not actionlesse remaine VVhich made him fly our dulnesse with disdain VVherefore brave Spirits that do inward burn Loving true glory joine with me and mourn And with your slames make him a funerall fire And with him end each thought that did aspire Smother in his Ashes what began to flame And teach your thoughts to study peacefull fame Temper your most untimely ill faln hear VVhich may your ruine not your glory get Except that idle glory you esteem Vying who most effeminate shall seem Most proud affected and like weeds of worth VVhich our best soyles uncultivate bring forth Mourn and lament him Patron of all truth Nay him the soule and glory of your youth Nor never hope an active time to see Except enforc't to act our miserie Happy our Fathers warlike spirits we Haplesse though fortunate our Sons may be To whom this seven yeare retrograde hath brought A Prince with like faire promis'd vertues fraught To top his story with victorious bayes As Iames with sweet of Peace hath blest our dayes Adding as many Crownes as Iames hath done To Crowne his titles with possession Thus glorious Comet with more zeale then art In thy fames dirige I beare a part Which may it pardon finde though hoarsly sung And passe with favour 'mongst th' Elegiack throng As writ by him who having vow'd sword-service Can ill performe a Poets sacrifice Upon the death of Anne of Denmarke Queen of great Britaine and the blazing Starre appearing neere her death taken for the stellifyed spirit of Prince Henry dead not long before BRave soul thou hast prevail'd God hath his owne And wee ill debters were nor paid the loane Of such a Jewell bee thou Henries Star Pointing thy mothers way and not our war Heaven bee appeas'd and grant our prayers and teares Prevent thy further anger and our feares Say that our false hearts to our selves and thee Deriding goodnesse and true pietie Led by our vaine affections as our God Not charitie say this deserves thy rod Let not the Roman petty Gods surpasse Thy rulers mercies Marcus Curtius was To them a sacrifice their wrath to swage Our losse hath doubled his then slack thy rage And grant againe we feele no further paines But blesse our dayes with joy in what remaines Epitaph HEre lies Iames his rich gem the eyes delight The graces mansion our faire dayes good night Glory of the Court object no sooner seene But knowne the gracefull presence of a Queene Rich Jewels shee is said to leave farre more Rich was shee in her pretious vertues store Heaven grant her royall vertues transportation Breed not a dearth unto her sex our nation Vpon the death of my faire Cousin Drury SSay passenger and for her sake Who while shee liv'd had power to make All eyes that on her cast their sight To fix with wonder and delight Daine that these lines one sigh may borrow Breathed from thy heart with generous sorrow To see in this sad Tombe now dwelling The fairest Drury late excelling In vertue beautie and all grace That heaven in earthly mould can place And that which may your griefe increase Is that shee did a maid decease And all that wee in her admir'd With her is perisht and expir'd Matchlesse shee lived unmatcht shee dide Druries sole heire and Suffolks pride Vpon the death of the supereminent Lady Haddington Delineated to the life IMperious soule proud Quintessence of wit Union of natures beautie forcing love Faire Haddington farewell here dead with thee Lie Loves awe sweetnesse life and majestie Manly ambitious spirits hope possest By conquest of fierce beautie to be blest Change your desires for sweare ambition The glorious subject of your hopes is gone Alas nor verse nor picture can expresse The least of her heart-winning lovelinesse Happy who knew her for he knew perfection Such as henceforth hath freed him from subjection Another MOunt up to heaven free soul with Larke-like joy Scorning our earthly base condition Where no malitious envie can annoy Thy faire ingenious disposition There shew thy selfe in thy pure nakednesse Where all thoughts in their simple truth appeare To speake thy selfe with true borne simplenesse Is vertues habit out of fashion here To covet flatter lie bee politique Hunt gaine with greedy falshood and deceipt To bee a devill so an hypocrite Are vertues to gaine this worlds good conceipt Thou wert not such and therefore happy now If faith and truth may happinesse procure Thy life thy truth death doth thy faith avow These are the golden wings that mount thee sure To lasting glory glory bee thy due For being faithfull noble faire and true An Incentive to our Poets upon the death of the victorious King of Swedeland FIe slow Boötes brood what not a line To celebrate a vertue so divine See you not Perseus mounted in the skie Outdoing all the antient Chivalry Expect you till his Steed dash on your braines To make you flow into heroick straines Can your Electrian facultie in wit Raise nothing but meere trash and strawes to it Is brave Gustavus of too solid stuffe His great exploits for your sleight veine too tusse That like poore falsifyers you despaire To profit from a peece so rich and faire Whilst from more triviall subjects you will drive A trade shall make your reputation thrive By ransacking the mysteries of Art To set a luster on some low desert Rouze up at length your over stupid muse Unite all in one quire and bravely chuse No other rapture whereupon
ground and you propitious be To this once powerfull now potentiall dust Concredited to your fraternall trust Till friends soules bodies meet eternallie And thou her tutelary Angel who Wer 't happy Guardian to so faire a charge O leave not now part of thy care at large But tender it as thou wer 't wont to doe Time common Father join with Mother Earth And though you all confound and she convert Favour this Relique of divine desert Deposited for a ne're dying birth Saint Church Earth Angel Time prove truly kind As she to you to this bequest consign'd Grotesque AS often as we speake we are censured but much more severely in our writings against them men take not onely a priviledge of boldnesse but make a kind of necessity of exercising their wit and judgement for feare of being concluded to want understanding if they discover it not in their exceptions they are the evidence that wisemen give in against themselves for a common Jury of fooles to passe upon them it must bee an extraordinary Coat of Mayle that hath no false and weake links searching spirits howe-ever weake in themselves will finde them out I have often observed that the weakest Sex and abilities will as soone discover a flaw and infirmity as the strongest they bend their wits to finde faults as doe the better sort vertues Noble and great Creatures seek not chinks and cranies a blemish in a garment is easily seen when the true web requires a judgement often as fine as it selfe I am no Doctor nor am I paid for cure of Soules and I have ever affected privacy and retirednesse of my poore wit so farre as to have avoided all publike exhibitions more then necessary duty hath imposed upon mee yet that I wrap not my talent wholly in a Napkin I am I know not how fallen upon this sally rather in truth to Register my self to my self then to the world many good wits use to write down their occurring conceits which chance useth to present better then any industry could extract I have bin a great loser for want of such practice I know the better sort such as I would admit and converse with want none of my sleight and pedling furniture yet may I serve to figure and awake unto them some such of their own stuffe as would possibly otherwise never have become elicit but have slept in their Magazine and Chaos My writing is rather to mend my self then others the world had long since been much better then it is if writing would have effected it finde fault with me who list they shall hardly finde or more or grosser then I know by my self Spectators and Censurers of lives and action exercise a Trade as easie as lazy Scepticisme Criticisme and Satyrism seldome miscarry It is as familiar to carpe as hard to write of the times and not to become Satyricall Errors in pretended Science errors in wit fashions and manners are so grosse that they seldome faile to meet with as just an invective and derision as refutation VVhat a businesse we have made to our selves by impatience of our naturall condition by our affectation of that flashy forbidden fruit of knowledge what a deale of Art building furnishing dressing policy and pastime are grown upon it nay what a businesse are our very pastimes become unto us how seriously wee cultivate our trifles our frothy aery ambitions nature made the supply of our mouth provision as well pleasure and pastime as necessity unto us other creatures finde it so and suffer as little hunger as men Examine our own rules and definitions of wisdome and judge whether they belong not more properly to other Animals then to our selves Our fore-fathers were not unsophisticated but what a super-sophistication have wee brought upon our selves more then formerly in plucking down our old often more convenient houses for the fancy of newfabricks then comes the endlesse variation of proud and costly furniture what a coaching what a tyring of truly tyring Women and Taylors what a curiosity of cookery wines and sawces which young men were wont as much to scorne as now they are curious to judge Nature is lost in us our life is become an affected Pageant of show and we are nothing lesse then our selves we are drown'd in our own Arts and follies True honour and vertue are not so much as Themes to discourse of we care not so much as to seeme vertuous honesty is a shamefull simplicity and vertue a net to catch Woodcocks but marke the end and you shall seldome see shame faile to overtake folly pride and vice For my part I abhorre basenesse and degenerosity so much thaâ— naturally I cannot well endure that an unworthy conceit of mee should lodge safely in any breast though fashion be become a kind of superstitious Religion and Religion taken up but for fashion and made superstition God hath cast mee in a better mould and this advantage I finde in goodnesse that as vice hath two contraries one of vertue another of its opposite vice so have vitious men as well the malignity of others as the goodnesse of the vertuous against them where vertue hath only vice for enemy And this benefit it hath that as in a good constitution of body it selfe and exercise will beare out some mis-dyet and mis-accident so will a predominancy of vertue and good reputation maintaine its proprietary against much unhappinesse and misfortune whereas an evill name you know of old is halfe hanged and serves for a milstone to sink an otherwise strong swimmer The strength of a predominant vertuous ingredience appeared in Manlius against his otherwise distastefull austerity as in other Roman Captaines against their remissenesse Gonsalvaes reputation not being made of Cobwebbe-Lawne bore him out against small exceptions There are infinite degrees of soules witnesse Oysters and Plant-animals insomuch as it is to bee doubted whether there bee any such substance as to be termed inanimate every one hath more or lesse its discourse or at least affectations But onely God is absolutely perfect Amongst us he is best who participates least imperfection and in whom vertue carries the greatest sway such deserve an indulgencie and shall finde it as well from God as man I am all infirme and imperfect in minde body and fortune yet this commodity grows even from such discommodity that as valetudinary bodies by a due care and temperance subsist often better and outlive more strong and presumptuous Complexions so doth a skanty yet competent fortune well ordered prove often more happy and lesse wanting then a luxuriant plenty The like may bee affirmed of a tendernesse of mind as Parsimony is a great Revenue so experience when it can Inane abscindere sol'do makes much of little High minds blouds and fortunes hardly moderate themselves and are most subject to inconvenience and ruine such seek to conquer all but themselves the want of which conquest exposeth them to all assaults and spoiles It is a task that few
is all in all for the best of us is subject to be carryed away both against what we know and what we would Such a blindnesse steales us from our selves This Discourse which I have these many yeares at times bin inclined unto and have forborn in respect of the little credit or use which it might beare and the confused nature of it ill befitting my health and condition wrapping my self in an honest conscience to my self and having long since put off the world and worldly censure yet have I at last thus tumultuarily adventured upon it having not cost me much above two houres in one afternoon wherein though I cannot vindicate my self for alas who can against errors so seeming easy to have bin avoided yet I can be content that such of mine as love me and truth should find me here such as I have bin and not such as I may be traduced Iune the first 1637. I Must not forget to thank God that my fortune is not utterly ruin'd considering how all helpes and hopes have failed me in my cure and otherwise how costly diversions have bin unto me wherby to support my self and how unfit I have bin in the mean time to look to my estate Debauch and gluttony have spoyled many a body and fortune scrupulous abstinence and care mine Though I acknowledge my fortune and estate left me was such as by this time I could in likelihood have so improved as that my quality should not require a better yet this give me leave to make appear that being engaged to mariage before eighteen yeares of age I had my quality left unto me with an estate of revenew not above six hundred pounds per Annum de claro little improvement to be made of a long time by reason of long leases and Joyntures Parkes and Houses I had to betray me and I was left so barely as my Predecessor dying at Michaelmas I had nothing to sustain me till the next rent dayes This would trouble a tender spirit to know which way to turn especially with other crosse circumstances in fortune I must insert one vow made by me which cost me a great part of my estate having against my intentions intangled my conscience thereby upon an unhappy accident of the greater house at turned into my hands at such time when I was throughly resolved for thrift in a most private course a quite other way Though I have made alienations for great summes yet know that many thousands I laid out in building at London and buying in Lease and the wood which did but return to me in the sale and many thousands of the sale remained beyond the debts where with my sonne hath been enabled to make some purchases and by Gods grace will make more reparation with the monies remaining I thank God with all my necessities I have left my Sonne both his freedom of choice and Wives portion Whosoever shall take notice of great possessions passed through and away from our Family let them know that the most of them were but in Transitu by the way of Mart never intended to be kept I must be content to appeare the only unthrift howsoever my unthriftinesse had not its root from my self but rather from fatall mis-accident and Predecessors undue consideration The good God be pleased to blesse my Sonne and make him as happy as I have been unhappy For my whole life since I have been a man hath been but a conflict with the worst of diseases and a wearisom seeking for contentment plunged in an inextricable gulf of all misery another man possibly would not have come off so well in fortune body or minde Good God how vaine and miserable a thing is man without thy good Spirit to direct him by nature corrupt by Art Sophisticate and confounded how lost in the ignorance and inexperience of youth how short of the tranquillitie of other creatures how often ruin'd by accident by mistaken courses I by that which men call good nature yet happy in worldly account are they whose natures lead them not only to affect thrift which many by reason of other not bad affections imperfectly doe but to make it their pleasure their felicity which humor throughly possessing them pleaseth profiteth and advanceth them in fortune and reputation whilst others bred to more ingenuous and faire appearing waies and studies unthriftily miscarry How ill unadvisedly do Parents provide for their young Heires giving them Tutors for Learning and Arts neglecting their instruction in true Vertue and use of the world and their fortunes How lamentable it is to see many who if left to themselves would doe well enough in the world over-swaied by others and so turned out of their way as that they cannot recover themselves But alas why suppose I it would goe well with us if left to our selves who know nothing more assuredly then this that all humane wit and resolution are vaine without the powerfull Grace of God to assist us That I implore that alone is my comfort and support that sweetens all the bitternesse of fortune unto me and but for that I would a thousand times as resolutely and constantly have left this life as others fondly and dotingly imbrace it Christian Religion had need be maintained in our hearts by a strong hand from above seeing it abridgeth us not only of our generall liberty of this worlds delights but even of the freedome of leaving the world when it affordeth no delight unto us Iune the seventh 1637. MAny things concurred to make me melancholy as a Complection Sanguine inclined to delight and pleasure Yet withall a naturall scrupulosity of election sensible of faire reputation and thrift affected with knowledge and at length a consciencious tendernes of Faith and Religion working me the greatest happinesse but not without great perplexity I was young entred at Court and by accident quickly dis-heartned for that course The use of my fortune in the Country was by want of meanes to keepe a comely house and other many crosse respects not free unto me and though afterwards I was drawn to house-keeping against my will and Discourse yet both in my estate and disease by the care retirednesse incident thereunto especially in a short fortune it proved most pernicious unto me My disease likewise was much if not originally occasioned in my body by an over-using of new Treakle against a danger of the Plague which I fell into by Mr. Sanders his death thereof neere to me in his travell with me at his return from London the first of King Iames. As also by an overspare and evill diet who for long together fed on little meate of good nourishment but only fat dredgings Skinnes and such like and in truth scarce ever man of my strong constitution and health gave lesse way to himself in pleasing his appetite This and much more wrought an alteration upon my minde and made me seek a supply of former pleasures by entertaining my self with studies and
the Irish Seas so troublesome and dangerous there is a proportion of bearing beyond which wee sink I was in my prime youth encountered with many unfavourable dysasters c. The great change of the Court and long greatnesse of them whom accident c. My absence in travaile hindering my falling in with those times my retirednesse by that course and over-exact study of language which certainly is proper only to children to whom it comes insensibly and is most troublesome to curious spirits these and much more conspired against me I would when my fortune was whole have matched my Sonne then very young and have assured my Lands upon him for a reasonable portion it could not bee My Predecessor after a long and desperate sicknesse lived just enough to marry me and many stranger things then these have befaln me in the Article of a Catastrophe to my fortune November 2. 1637. TO say something still of diverse ambiguities and perplexities incident to my condition and fortune which besides the accidentall melancholy bred in my body could hardly saile to work an alteration and disease upon a minde curious of avoiding inconveniencies and choosing the best my nature was bent to ordinary pleasures yet morally withdrawn to an observation of decency vertue moderation and improvement of knowledge with an acquisite affectation of Philosophicall Morall Civill and Christian perfection wherein as well for vogue fashion and reputation as truth I could not willingly consent to come short of the best When I grew towards manhood being of myself disposed to forbeare marriage untill I should be thirty yeares old and then not to marry without great choyce in fitting my self and obtaining a fulnesse of fortune to set my self at ease in my quality and that estate â— c I saw the inconvenience but Wife Children and my disease made me unfit for another mans house and though I wished yet I could not resolve a change which to me who could never easily admit a resolution with inconveniencies attending it was ever abhorrent my naturall curiosity whose minde was never quiet till all circumstances and conveniencies were run over and over and accommodated by me made all things especially in a seat of my own most troublesome To the melancholy tainted spirit nothing is more unfit then idlenesse nothing more troublesome then its curious discoursing upon resolutions nothing more unfit then confinement to one place yet nothing more hard then to resolve and digest change and alteration Once marryed I was set to seek how to live where to live my birth and breeding was in the City my affection and chiefe seat in Cambridgeshire but many strong considerations diverting mee from it The Court where I was young entred followed might have kept me from that depth of melancholy whereunto travaile study and retirednesse in care and fancy of what belonged to a house drowned mee but that also by accident was unfit for me yet at length for a strong diversion and under so brave a patronage as that of Prince Henry I readventured upon it but his immature death and much sicknesse of my own following upon it with other disproportions finally aliened me from that course Thus and much more hath my life been a conflict with disease and fortune I have formerly touched many more particulars yet not all nor the worst It is one of the greatest in satisfactions of writing to an ingenuous spirit in most important matters to have least freedome there are many Noli me tangere's The contrast of Gods grace and Religion against the impetuosity of naturall affections hath been many yeares my greatest combat I have fought resolutely but received many foiles yet by the infinite goodnesse of my Saviour I have received such most unexpected succour that to my unvaluable comfort I triumph c. I have dedicated my self next to God wholly to my Son and have many years endevoured his good beyond my own I have now made my self his Pensioner and I wish no worldly happinesse more then his prosperity thus with a running pen I ease my minde which though with no serious exactnesse yet with little prejudice to my health for otherwise the strength of my disease would not suffer me to beare the strength and curiosity of my own discourse He who is subject to melancholy let him shun as a Rock at Sea over-studying or tyring of his thoughts and when he finds conclusions come not off cleerly and that a restinesse of discourse grows upon him let him give over for the present not admitting the least tumultuation till such a good and fit time after as he may return new and fresh to work by this meanes shall hee avoid much hurt of his spirits and attain better to his ends In reading also little and little at once shall dispatch more and that without inconvenience of health then much together to the oppression of the soule Ne quid nimis in all things is an excellent instruction How many a man hath tyred his horse by riding a little too fast who might otherwise have come well to his journies end The like is seen in expence a very little contracting would often have given ease and thrist where a very small overspending hath bred continuall want and ruine By my miserable experience I could give many rules upon this worlds course and melancholy Moderation is good but Gods grace is above all and without it nothing can prosper How lustily doth the root feed a tree whose branches are few and small in respect To the all-seeing God be glory for with us but through him dwels nothing but darknesse errour frailty and ignorance November 4. 1637. MY gracious God the support and guide of us and all our actions since thou hast vouch safed to grant mee a firme and happy faith in Christ and love of thee with a contempt of all earthly and carnall joyes confirm unto me I most humbly beseech thee thy heavenly graces and the comfort of thy good Spirit for I abhorre my self whensoever that joy faileth me or any worldly affections assault me none more then I knows their vanity their unsoundnesse their emptinesse of all true and perfect satisfaction such as left mee ever to seek ever unquiet till such time as I wholly resigned my self unto thee The world is a wildernesse of ravenous beasts there is no path no safety no contentment or protection but through thy favour Sweet Lord impart it unto me and I shall finde that quiet and joy of heart which I have ever wanted Helpe me for I shall hate my self if through the infirmity of my flesh and blood I reap not more joy and complacence in my surrender to thee and in thy grace then ever I did or could finde in the most full and flattering pleasures which this instable world affords I have often found thy most mercifull and miraculous reliefe and support beyond expectation beyond naturall conceit Let thy mercy and grace continue with mee to my end and
at thy good pleasure set a period to that life which I only hold in expectation of a happy discharge and dissolution by thee Amen Amen November 5. 1637. A Physitian once told me upon repaire to him for my disease that I was to resort to God call upon him for his grace and guide my self by him or to like effect I thought it then strange and improper in his profession but I have found it spoken like my good Angell for there is no such anchor nor such receipt to a troubled to an agitated soule The melancholy humour once predominant in despite of judgement and resolution will obtrude importunate thoughts and fancies take occasion from almost every object to make a troublesome and discoursing impression make things otherwise of easie resolution anxious and vexing representing difficulties as fast as designes whereunto free spirits are not in the least sort obnoxious they are in a cleare light and alacrity delighted in themselves entertained and diverted with ordinary conversation businesse and pastime whilest the other droope and howsoever often naturally quick would play upon the wing the melancholy clog checks and pulls them to the ground God alone is the Hercules that can purge that Augean stable the Aesculapius who can give reliefe ordinary Physick is but a palliation nay often an aggravation of the disease The powder called Kellowayes powder with Gods blessing is to bee prized for it goes to the root it workes at length and so as the patient may sleep play goe on in an ordinary diet and course a common and long course which urgeth keeping in weakens and makes tender is mischievous and incompatible if such powder breed inconvenience Epsam waters though but a draught in a day at morning wonderfully allay and rectifie as also the use of new and good Sider these with Gods grace constant exercise and a moderation of the minde are incomparable Probatum God hath given mee so strong a body and minde to beare the injuries I have received from my self accident and course of Physicke that I admire May it please him to make my life and death to his glory November 6. 1637. GOod God of thy great goodnesse continue thy mercy upon me and as I have hitherto proved the truth of all worldly things to bee nothing but vanity and vexation of spirit so be thou to me joy and comfort It is true that my nature education course of life and disease require society and diversion the consideration of my past and present fortune is full of sadnesse but thou canst raise light out of darknesse and joy from sorrow thy good spirit is the spirit of comfort and without thee there is truely none thou hast blessed me so farre as to have allayed satisfyed and expelled all my worldly fancies I have fitted my house and fortune to my Son in as much as I affected and was capable blesse it unto him and by thy grace exempt him from these unquietnesses which I have found there is no perfect no solid happinesse in this world teach him to beare such inconveniencies as may be better born then sought with an unquiet unsetling to be avoided it hath bin to me a great disease to over-humour my self therein there will in all conditions be something amisse a minde curious and impatient is a great mischief Thus appeareth that which hath been observed that men seldom or never betake themselves to good and right courses till such time as a pressing necessity I might rather say God compelleth and enforceth them Necessity I have ever said is the sure reformer then and not till then and often after smart we contract our selves and contain and refrain our extravagancies presumption dissolution and luxuriant fancies November 6. 1637. A Searching spirit falne amongst the crudities and cavills of this worlds Sophistry and imperfections is a great oppressor it were well if contentions lay only as some affirme in the brink and not in the depth of Sciences search shews it farre otherwise It is a happy spirit that can passe lightly over the things of this world and even in matters and mysteries of Faith Curiosity is neither safe nor allowable I am something of the nature of those dogges which comming into a strange place rest not till they have ferited every corner It is likewise a naturall importunity with me in any thing that concernes me in minde body or fortune not to take full rest till such time as to my capacity I have run over all that seemeth to belong to such resolution willingly I sit not down short of other men I mean in honesty decency and knowledge much lesse short of my self Yet if we seriously and curiously minde these earthly things they are full of scruple and vexation if we slight them a deliberating nature wants much of satisfaction and contentment and doth as it were brutifie and sin against it self yet so shall it as well Minus dolere as gaudere It is that which I have long since found and affirmed that if we set our hearts on these worldly matters they prove foolishnesse and perturbation if we be cold and dull in them all things are alike but it is the misery of a hot complection that it requires entertainment hot full and stirring c. Where grace once infuseth it self all earthly troubles are evacuated that alone is friends pleasure and advantage enough it is all-sufficient all consolation perfect then good God the inestimable gift of Faith which thou hast given me it is truely thy gift flesh and blood cannot afford nor relish it thy wayes to it are wonderfull often sharp but most sweet in the conclusion I kisse thy rod I rejoyce in my afflictions and feele that I had perished if I had not perished Thou who hast rebuked the winds and they have obeyed thee rectifie my spirit and calm all suggestions all stormes within me Then may melancholy be infectious but not mortall then shall I live and die to thee and thy glory which is all my ambition all my prayer November 7. 1637. I Have not found any thing more strange nor been more abused in any thing then that constitution of soule which is frequent and more or lesse incident to us all so mixt so Heterogene so pregnant and right of understanding in some things and so dull and wrong in others such commonly are they which most disturb the world as dissonant from weaknesse as true strength of judgement exhibiting according to the saying such productions as a fool could not and perfection would not so appearing docile and capable of reason and improvement and yet in effect so insensate incorrigible and unalterable as it is hard to conceive how such incongruities and inconsequences should consist in the same subject or in truth how they can quadrate with a soule rationall and instructible but there is assigned to us all a naturall stature in all things which no Art food or industry can inable us to exceed The ordering of
and felicity and nothing but the perfect joyes of Heaven can satisfie the perfection and Summum bonum affecting soule When wee have said and done what we can we are in such a mist and confusion of things so short sighted through our false Perspective that there is much chance in discerning the truth and right way even of things within our reach and capacity in despight of all our search and circumspection God is all in all without him seeing we shall not see and understanding wee shall not understand who referres to nature and our naturall universality of faculties and not to his extraordinary influence is blinde to his grace and operation By him we live move and have our being and no thing or faculty workes but through his grace and providence FAntasie in us is like the saile of a Ship without it we want much of ornament and motion with a predominancy of it we are in danger of over-setting without it many things otherwise delightfull are dull and insipid and if it be over pregnant it ordinarily ruins and befooles us It is our Soules Perspective multiplying objects at one end and lessening them at the other it is a better servant then Master Happy they whose Steer and Balast can rule and command it It is a Horse that must be born with a hard hand if it get head it transports us to much inconvenience and hardly containes it self within any limits of judgement and reason All things take their tincture from it It is to be lesse then man to want it and more to bridle and over-rule it God alone can temper and moderate our inordinate fancies and affections he alone is commensurable to our vast desires Moderation hath ever been a hard vertue the most conscientious spirits have ever been subject to superstition and Idolatry strength of fantasie is apt to multiply it self beyond measure irreligious hearts cut the Gordian knot which they cannot unty to distinguish betwixt God and man must be from God and not from man Man may endevour and concurre but God alone can cleare and confirme My good God I will with thy good grace let my heart loose to no other object then thy self and what is pleasing unto thee so shall I have fulnesse of joy nor shall I regret or envy the most splendid employments or fantasticall delights where with this world Syren-like enchants the mindes of such as dote upon it smile thou upon me and let the world frown or scorn the worlds kisses are poyson the embraces confusion they carry their sting with them but thy favour is present and eternall felicity If the very enjoying of our fancies and feeding them be a kind of surfeit and oppression what is it to faile be crossed and miscarry in them Little saile and little fancy make the best and safest voyage To conclude these shreds and ejaculations which may weary but never satisfie either my self or any other for there is evermore and better to be said our artificiall infirme and perplexed condition is to a curious strong minde a naturall and strong distraction a large and various prospect works upon and divides the fancy and with a divulsion breeds a kinde of convulsion in the spirits and a solution of that sweet continuity and harmony which God hath ordained naturall unto us Originall and actuall sin inhabiting in us deserve that and much other punishment If God of his great grace and indulgence give us not a clew of his thred to guide us we are confounded and lost in this worlds Labyrinth he is ours and the worlds prop and if it had not pleased him wonderfully to assist and support me with extraordinary strength of resolution and his good Spirit I had a thousand times perished in my errors and confusion Wilde affections which lead grave reason by the nose had undone me a vertiginous spirit and my own weight and strength had oppressed me and well might I miscarry seeing the strongest spirits are in the multiformity of their discourse most obnoxious to finde reason to fortifie themselves in the grossest obliquities to us in propriety is all sensuality vanity foolish presumption Sophistication and corruption of truth with innumerable exorbitancies and follies But to God only good onely wise just mercifull and omnipotent be ascribed all honour and glory for evermore Amen Amen Good God I am the work of thy hands and now happily of thy good Spirit let thy mercy work with me and upon me to the end and Eternity Tot contra unum caput conspirantibus quis potuissetresistere nisi Dei optimi maximi speciali gratia aspirante There had need in truth be an extraordinary supply and support of reason and grace against the strange and strong fond impressions of the Melancholy humour November 25. 1637. IT is said that if a horse could be equally placed to provender on each side of him he would sooner starve then resolve I was ambiguously constituted balanced in disposition betwixt contemplation and action thrift and comlinesse pleasures of the body and minde vice and vertue Country Town and Court private or publique course of life and no wonder if Dubia torquent the world is a Riddle an entangled skaine vexatious to extricate to intend our mindes and affections much upon it is as well misery as vanity it payes us with a Cloud in stead of Iuno torment in stead of contentment we often lose substances for shadows and felicity by over-searching it There is a proportion of wit most conducible to this worlds resolutions and happinesse if we exceed or come short of that element either the heighth and finenesse of the Aire agrees not with our Lungs and subsistence or we are dampt and suffocated in an over earthly and flegmatique dulnesse As in squared paving stone such onely endure the earth and open weather as are neither over-hard nor soft so is it in the temper of mens spirits for the undergoing of this worlds incidents Happy such as most slightingly passe through it yea God himself requires that we esteem it as but a passage to Eternity a point a nothing in respect He only can fill and satisfie the curious soule I cannot be sorry that the pleasures of this life concern me neither in use nor affection when I consider their sting their molestations and emptinesse compared with the sweet comforts of Gods favour and the blessednesse of everlasting life There like the upper Region dwels all peace purity and glory Here all corruption Meteors of imperfect mixtion stormes and calamities There is our true Country and Region where when God shall have refined us wee shall live and shine more glorious then the Starres I Have promiscuously specifyed the causes and originalls of my Melancholy disease I was deeply ingaged in it before I suspected it and had given so much way to it to take root in me as made the Cure most difficult It is a Goliah but we must not like David fight against it with our own Armes
though the Melancholique patient hath a Wolfe by the eares of his disease trouble in holding and stirring and unsafe to let goe yet I esteem it a poore resolution to suffer a rooted mischiefe which is presently noxious and will more and more grow dangerous upon feare of adventure where there is any the least hope of delivering our selves in supportable evils admit and excite rather to any hazard then a miserable toleration a hopelesse condition is most calamitous a well-built body will indure and work out very much like a good Ship against soule weather at Sea mine I thank God is such that had not my minde like an evill Steers-man infinitely even of late been injurious unto it I had by Gods grace infallibly prevailed both against my Giant disease and infinite intervening unfriendly accidents but by Gods help I daily mend and hope to leap over the wall Nil desperandum in Christo nil aâ—spice Christo. L'industrie est de nous L'heâ—rex suceez de dieu December 11. 1637. TO give us courage in misfortunes it was well said of Fortune that her course is irregular and that we ought not to despaire of her for often when she appeares to threaten us with imminent ruine she is truely in the article and Catastrophe of our good and advantage It is more verifyed in the wayes of God nothing more ordinary with him then by humbling us to exalt us and to strew the path to Heaven with afflictions Caesar animated his Pilot by carrying him and his Fortunes it was a vain presumption but he who the Almighty is Pilot to cannot sink nor miscarry to demonstrate his power and awake the faith of his Favourites he permits as to his Disciples the stormes to rise and waves to threaten destruction and in his mighty and supernaturall rescues appeare his sweetest comforts his greatest glory Nec Deus intersit nisi dignus vindice nodus as the Divines affirm that tentations proceeding from the Devill may bee distinguished by their violent and suddain surprise So may Divine deliverances be infallibly known by the suddain and extraordinary help that we receive from them at such time as our condition appeares unto us most irremediable and desperate I have infinite matter and thanks to render to my Maker to my Saviour but in nothing more then that of his abundant mercy hee hath been pleased to lead me through Seas through Wildernesses of troubles and errour by a cloud by fire by the thunder of his voice by infinite wonders for neere forty yeares together to bring meat last to his happy Land of promise that is to peace joy and repose in him where alone flows all true happinesse and fixed contentment There can in truth be no constant courage without a firm Faith and assurance of Gods favour towards us that alone fortifies us against danger darknesse and death December 12. 1637. IT is truely said that wee know so much as we put in practice nor are the notions and floting impressions of the brain without a through tincture of the heart and soule any effectuall Science and so it is that vertue is constituted a habit and not only a babling scientificall discourse of the minde untill I considered this I often wondered to see the best Clerks often the worst men as well as none of wisest Men read and study commonly rather for curiosity to censure to learne language and the course and manner of the world to maintain a side to gain bread and knowledge like other men rather then truth vertue and piety to gather opinions and to appeare good rather then to be Propounding to our selves wrong objects no wonder if wee misse the right which makes so many Scholars who study to get the best Livings lesse vertuous in their lives then others who more vertuously and spiritually then worldly affected study rather to nourish then cloath to Dye then paint their mindes Corrupt nature like a depraved stomach turns and assimilates all nourishment it makes an alien of forain instruction and governs it selfe by its own Laws Nay ordinarily against our wills and resolutions nature relapses and ravisheth us from our Moralls from our Metaphysicals Sensuality prevailes and we prevaricate with our Consciences when I approached Gods Sanctuary this was yet lesse strange unto me there as Copernicus hath placed the Sun in the Center of this Universe whose influence and Magnetique vertue gives life and motion to all materiall creatures so is it cleare that the immateriall minde of man hath its life and motion only from the good Spirit of God and unlesse by his influence and inspiration he carry our instructions and informations to the root except he alter reform and season our hearts like hasty showers all passeth away whereas a sound heavenly dew worketh a better watering and fruitfulnesse want of that Divine irradiation makes us such Mungrills such half Christians as we ordinarily are acknowledging our Faith and Saviour in our tongues and denying him in our lives God of his great grace grant us his saving Spirit and we shall as well practice as seem to know and professe Amen Amen December 14. 1637. NO wonder that I search into the abstruse causes and proceedings of my disease for I am a wonder to my self that a Sanguine complection with a naturall strength of body and minde and none of the most impertinent in wit and discourse should fall into so great a confusion and consumption of minde body and fortune without some outward most apparent violence But besides what I have formerly expressed I consider that steeping my self in my beginnings in the study of Mountaynes Essayes which are full of Scepticisme and a kinde of Morall mortification in crying down the delights and presumptions of this world proved to a tainted and tender minde a great amatement and blunting with an anxious disposition of doubt in the ordinary course and pleasures of this life that and much adverse accident nipt me in my first Spring otherwise in all probability I who in that lownesse and oppression of spirits which hath possessed me could yet so beare up as in some measure to become sought and respected by the better sort might have been somewhat more then I have been in the eminency of this world but the great and good God hath otherwise ordained nor am I without hope that hee who hath to this day so wonderfully supported and converted me will thereby work his glory and my good It is true that my course hath been most improsperous yet never of a grossely irrationall or unthrifty election I have in truth been so farre from humouring my self in the impulsions of Nature or most delightfull objects of my fancy that I have mainly resisted my self therein It hath pleased God to make me an instrument of crossing and punishing my self in whatsoever I most placed my minde The obstinate continuance of my disease and the failings of those whom I have trusted and relyed upon have abused me I have lost much
especially of natures course and proceedings their true and reall motives springs and wayes are in most important effects secret concealed and disguised ordinarily hidden in their originall even from our selves that act we may take copies of others faces but not of their hearts with any assurance It hath been an honest advise to keep a corner of our heart to our selves and if an honest heart ought not in point of discretion to expose it self what truth is to be expected from hypocrisie and dissimulation One absurdity admitted a thousand follow and to the foundation of my disease laid in the excesse of Treacle infinite have been the effects and my sufferings which have flowne from that and other concurring circumstances I have at the entrance of my alteration been ready to sink at the Table I have many yeares since travail'd and slept with cordialls at hand to keep me alive nor left I them till a hearty friend told me the heart must comfort the heart which yet was lame and ineffectuall in my strongest resolutions till I had recourse to God the onely true spirit of courage and resolution to a curious and well-affected minde and a weather-beaten Soule there is no other refuge or harbor of safety satisfaction and tranquillity There are Climates where it seldome or never Raines others which clouds malusque Iupiter urgent In one and the same Country where the earth and heavens in their constant seasons should bee as constantly disposed yet doth the same time of the yeare prove sometimes cold and wet sometimes hot and dry the materials and circumstances appearing the same this must rise from secret Springs and combinations above the reach of our discourse The same diversity and contrariety of effects befals men in their fortunes howsoever in appearance equally constituted God is the cause of causes He hath in all times and Countries provided wonders above the ordinary course of Nature to humble and convince our humane presumption I had a body and a minde so strongly built that had not my spirituall and intellectuall parts predominated in me to withdraw me from a base vulgar abandoning my self to sensuality no man in probability could better have subsisted and maintained himself against ordinary course of dissolution and debauch I had a Spirit naturally tempered to contain and contract it self above all excesse but it s own And even that as well as another it might have bridled had not Melancholy and other adverse conditions surprised and mastered it betrayed unto them under colour of friendship The blood is said to be the bridle of all humours that I lost and much of my good spiâ—its with it in the conflict but God hath proved a better bridle a better spirit unto me Innocent and groundlesse blushings proceeding from the tenuity and waste of my blood and spirits have been none of my least importune and prejudiciall symptomes Such weaknesse joyned with a strong fancy hath made me subject to blush not onely to my self alone but upon any surprise of mention and conceit not only upon any reall occasion but upon what there might be so much as a possibility of in the apprehension of another I have taken my self blushing at the appearing or name of a woman who had shee been Eve and I Adam the humane race would have been in great danger of failing at length custome and complying with a conceited expectation of others produced it c. God hath by his extraordinary grace upon my humiliation furnished me with as strange meanes to subsist as I at the first found extravagant means to keep low and oppresse my self In the depth of Melancholy I have not found so much as a melancholy dream my spirits have taken root from above and have grown upon it Long since after a great disease I had such a tendernesse of spirits and humours that a thick cloud could not passe over me but I felt an alteration upon it It is strange how a transient thought will work and give a suddain stroak to a remote and ill-affected weakned part of the body the minde workes not alone by the heart and brain as is vulgarly conceived but the praecordia and all parts more or lesse contribute and are affected therein and God hath blessed me with a minde so strong that it ever discharged it self in its passions and errors more in my body then its own sufferings but they are still Hippocrates his Twins and must weep or laugh together I have now disburthened my self of all trouble but this of writing I am too inexhaustible therein weary me it doth satisfie me it cannot I will change the Scene and seeing I finde my self so ill a Companion I will seek better company I have ever been over-hard to please in conversation my present affections and habit make me now more dainty what shall I doe I have by Gods great grace recovered in great part those Jewels of peace and health which I had long lost Therefore I will no longer rake in this puddle nor abuse his grace in over-bold and indiscreet presumption Like the stranger belonging to another Country I will transitorily please my self and converse with the common passions and Interests of this world I will spend my time in search of goodnesse and will make much of it where I finde it I will wash my hands in Innocency my Soule in my Saviours blood and wrap my self in my own vertue and his merits relying on his neverfailing mercy Amen Amen March 1. 1637. THough friends be absent conversation lost My bating Soule oft labouring in it self By winds and fortune on the black Sea tost Thou present Lord I feare nor wave nor shelf Thou Father Brother art and Friends to me Be the world whose it list so thou be mine They ne're miscarry who rely on thee Grace stormes dispells more strong then they combine All thrives where thou the pruning Gardener art To thy Plants blastings frugall blessings prove Though Summer heighth and flourishing impart Winter gives strength and Timber to the Grove To thine all sufferings end in joy and rest And th' absence of a wicked world is best Forced delights and contentment are no delight or contentment dispose Oh Lord my affections and I am happy untill I had digested the tough morsels and crudities of this world I could never have had peace and quiet IOckey and his Horse were by their Master sent To honour him in hunting run and race To put in for the Bell and take content In honest sort fitting faire time and place In pride of nature fit for any sport Jolly and lusty both at first they were But shortly after both of them fell short What by mischance by ill-advise and care Soon he became engaged to a match Which cost him dear both on the By and Main He thought himself no easie peece to catch But knew not to resist so strong a train He now conceits he could not hope to win Except his horse were straightly dieted Such course
carelesnesse presumption impatience and a treacherous indulgence to his own humours our common reigning maladies have been the cause Wee are of late so out of our wits that our very mother wit of keeping our selves warme failes both in our mothers and us By naturall heate wee live want of clothes want of cherishing it makes us all suffer Though you know my mind concerning Physitians yet such is their Ius acquisitum that my sonne is under their jurisdiction God send it to his good cold taken upon Physick hath cast him downe I have been present at their Anatomicall discourse of his distemper danger and cure excellent termes to amuse and amase the credulous ignorant enough to worke a cure by the enchantment and charme of their words and language Yet I cannot but compare it to a Rope-dancer whom I have seene doe his tricks and show his Art in a Sack if his footing were right good if other hazard for a neck or limbe But here if their learned blindnesse mistake the poore paying Patient must suffer It is just that they who cannot governe themselves should be ruled by others often worse These and more evills must we suffer as it is in the 14. Chap. of the booke of Wisedome Verse the 22. from the warres of theirs and our ignorance A word or two lesse would have ended with the bottome of the page but howsoever I end well if you continue and accept me Your faithfull Friend and Servant November 12. 1638. The Shepherd Sheep and Wolfe MY true fair-minded Friend I beleeve you now in labour to Preach and mend the vitious world I also wish but little hope to doe it by writing you sow and I write in the Sand wee both dwell at the sign of the Labour in vaine the More will not change his hew nor the Leopards their spots they cannot nay they would not you shall not perswade them they are blemishes no more then the Lady her affected patches on her face they are in fashion and appeare faire in their own eyes as every mans way and pleasure to himselfe we may lament one anothers endevours others will deride us or possibly some will be so good as say Well said well writ and as they use their feasts eate and forget the sober diet breeds the better nourishment example is the better Teacher but it must bee numerous to prevaile Vertue is grown but a name and that neither well understood nor agreed on Some honest men there are Rari nantes in gurgite vasto they may make much of themselves and wrap themselves in their own vertue a habit God knows out of fashion they are fitter for Cloysters then the worlds traffique and like square playing Gamesters shall be sure to bee made a prey and sit down by the losse their strong constitution may resist the corruption of the times they shall not alter them their innocence shall have as little power howsoever commended as fresh waters upon the Seas saltnesse the worlds antiperistasis may better them not they the world But how comes it that so few are honest is it that perfection must bee as rare and hard in Nature as in Art is it that our artificiall confused meat and drink infect our bodies and they our soules is it the perniciousnesse of example in great and powerfull persons who sway the times and seldome originally attain to riches honours and greatnesse by just and honest wayes Or is it that as some species of creatures are of a perverse and evill nature such as live by rapine and destruction such as Apes Wolves c. so man is naturally of a mischievous kind if so them may a good natured man be esteemed a Monster and rather an error then perfection of Nature Is it these or is it not rather the corruption of our mindes and affections by having changed and perverted Nature from her first purity into Artificiall fancy and affectation of enthralling others and inriching our selves So that as women are in respect of their attire often the least part of themselves the like may bee said of man in the disguise of the minde So it is and such punishment is deserved in our desertion and rebellion against God and Nature We are one anothers scourges wee are scourges to our selves If you and I and others are rather Sheep then Wolves let us thank God whose grace it is let us cloathe our selves in our own wooll short Pasture will content us for food little drink more then the dew of Heaven Thither let us tend towards him whose mark we bear the great Shepherd of our Soules Let Wolves be wolves whilest hee is our Shepherd and his good Angels our guard we are safe and happy now and forever let the wolves of this world the Loup-garrons the mankinde wolves devoure what they can they shall devoure but what they can most commonly one another There are so few of us they would else want meat though their rage be great their time is short our comforts are sweeter more permanent as much as they contemn us they are content to make use of our cloathing they reckon us foolish Martyrs of a foolish Philosophy and wee them beasts of a foule deformity They are ugly to God ugly to goodnesse often ugly to one another and ugly to themselves especially when affliction sicknesse and infirmity le ts loose that Band-dog Conscience upon them which they had formerly in their prosperity tyed up and kept in darknesse and sleep hating and hated flattering themselves with strong delusions to one anothers torture for the present and eternall torment hereafter I leave them committing you and all good men the Sheep of God to his inviolable infallible protection Amen Amen November 14. 1638. NO wonder if a perverse nature use perverse and crooked wayes a Serpent cannot goe right craft is the evill mans instrument to evill ends as cunning is sometimes necessary to good men for good purposes evill men are in the dark they are blinde to true vertue and charity their workes are workes of darknesse and their wayes accordingly it is the glory of discreet power in goodnesse to walk fairly and choose the open safe and faire way where others how ever powerfull needlesly encumber and bemire themselves in bryers and bogges As I have often said it is a sweet thing to see knaves miscarry and play the fooles as commonly they doe they like the Woodcock think themselves more concealed then they are as much unduly overweening themselves as undervaluing others I never knew a foole without some kinde of craft nor a wise man affect it MY second Father Brother and spirit of comfort thus yet I am so happy as to converse with you in absence it is a piece of my misfortune to bee at so great a distance from you in the same Town my late long and hasty walke unto you endangered a distemper and sicknesse upon me but as burning with burning so evill of exercise with exercise is cured Naturall
contemperament and heat strength goodnesse and sweetnesse of nature and supernaturall grace excited and maintained I finde the best companions and Physitians of body and soule you are witnesse how necessary they have been of late unto me in the sorrows and troubles I have undergone I thank you for your visit and spirituall comfort you imparted to my relapsed Son hee still needeth it hee hath not wanted naturall heat and courage temper moderation and a well concocted discourse as well as a thorow digestion to some peccant humours of his body I feare he doth Time and conflict with evills have not confirmed and wrought upon him exchange of liberty health and pleasures for disease restraint and paine with an apprehensive contemplation of imminent death this mortall yeare work a melancholick dejection upon his minde and meeting with his infirmity appeare at this time his greatest danger A little ease strength and alacrity of spirits animate his naturall presumption to his harm and a little cloud overcasting him as much exanimates If God had not furnished me with as strong a resolution to flight as I have ever been apt to apprehend the worst events I had a thousand times miscarryed there is no slavery like the feare of death no bravery like the contempt of the world and fortune I have lost possessions friends brothers children but I have found God and have not lost my selfe I have sowed kindnesse and reaped dis-respect my good intentions charity resolution and the grace of God are my reward and ever-relieving cordials I seek not my self abroad nor judge my self or others by the successe others weaknesse and distempers shall not be mine it shall rather fortifie and recollect mee if my exuberance of naturall heate and fancy breed my inconvenience I can make an oyle of the same Scorpion to help me not to have too much is not to have enough Aliquid amputandum is the best constitution luxuriance of Nature is the longest laster at least if violence accident and over-bold indiscreet adventure intercept it not heat is the vehiculâ—m of vertue hot natured plants have the strongest faculties and braveliest resist the vigour and extremity of weather and Winter Thus I play the Pedler with you to you I open my pack of small wares to the world I durst but will not they would but pry and smile and scorn not buy to use to weare and make their own You finde here a great deale of trash but no trumpery many bables and toyes yet some Gloves to weare Knives to cut Linnen to adorn cover and keep warme Looking-glasses to see and order your self Pedlers are not ever unwelcome sometimes they are required at least let my good will make not unwelcome unto you this my good morrow Yet to goe a little further and end where I begun There is a happy and just use to be made of naturall heate of our selves and of Gods creatures instituted as Oyle for cheerefulnesse of countenance and Wine to rejoyce the heart of man that use to finde that to practise without declining either to excesse or fantasticall superstition and rigidity of humane Sophistry prevarication and errour is that wee ought to endevour and pray for in the discreet exercise of a good conscience which God grant us Amen November 17. 1638. THus you see Animal vigilans semper laborat some more remisse some more intense according to the activity of their spirits and occasions but my voyage is well past over and I will not spread my sayles to every winde I will be a stone to my self against the wings of my thoughts sedation shall be my affectation I will spare my fuell and rake up my fire let them make publique bonfires and ring their Bells to warme and sport the world who finde matter and joy to publish mine is inward and shall serve my self till opportunity concurre accept in good part with your wonted favour this my pastime account and register never intended for a work or piece of worth Farewell SOules must have objects strong high-relished The strongest filling fair and permanent Such is Gods love wherewith not nourished Earthly and base must be their nutriment No other love can defecate a soule From wallowing in delights base empty foule THou Lord who first didst nip me in the bud From time to time dost humble mee Lest I should sin by heighth of blood And love the world more then the love of thee I gratulate thy favour confident That so thou doest my soule preserve To bee a well-tun'd instrument To sound thy praise and thy decrees to serve Nor will I envy this mans wantonnesse His honor or the others wealth Esteeming nothing happinesse But to possesse a soule in heavenly health All other joyes infatuate the minde Feeding it with a false content Oh let me still thy favour finde To keep me thine I grudge no chastisement Moderate health and fortune are the best A little fire close set unto And heat sufficient to digest Doe the same things that more abounding doe The more wee have the more we still presume Disordred mindes good states abuse The highest spirits most consume May I have nothing more then grace to use Great Farmes are seldome duely husbanded Ranke grounds abound in noysome weeds Wolves Foxes Goates in wastes are bred He feeds more foes then Friends who many feeds THough Friends be absent conversation lost My bating Soule oft labouring in it self By winds and fortune on the black Sea tost Thou present Lord I feare nor wave nor shelf Thou Father Brother art and Friends to me Be the world whose it list so thou be mine They ne're miscarry who rely on thee Grace storms dispels more strong then they combine All thrives where thou the pruning Gardner art To thy Plants blastings frugall blessings prove Though Summer heighth and flourishing impart Winter gives strength and Timber to the Grove To thine all sufferings end in joy and rest And th' absence of a wicked world is best EAse handsomnesse nor profit 't is to tread Your shooe awry like may of vice be said T is ever best to live and walk upright Things crooked grown hardly return to right May I enjoy a faire and quiet minde Soules work like troubled Seas long after winde GOdly content and quiet of the minde Constitute happinesse resembling Heaven Where soules nor strife nor thirst of action finde Reluctancy is conquer'd all goes even Vertue it self untroubled must proceed Howe're its Acts miscarry or succeed Devotions Et quoniam Deus ora movet Sequar ora moventem Introduction DIvinest Herberts Soule daign that I joyn In Hymns accorded to the heart by thine Unto our Masters glory and admit Mee for a Rivall in thy heighth of love For though thy lofty flight bee farre above My creeping Muse in spirit verse and wit My love both may and ought thy love exceed Since greatest pardons greatest love doe breed Thus living sing we Swan-like singing dye His Panegyrick our own Elegie Others I
honour riches pleasures sensuall The Idols which the world doth most adore I flight as much and so I master all That others creepe to Nothing I implore Lord but thy grace in that more pleasure rests Then all the base delights that flesh suggests IMagination what thou canst produce By thy prolisique pregnant facultie Is a discourse as subtile as abstruse How thy owne species thou dost multiply In what great distance secret sympathy Through ayre or spirits thou act'st on things remote I cannot say with perspicuitie Nor how thy impertitions are begot Distempers and conceits doe verifie Strong fancied objects outwardly appeare Paying in opticall realitie The intromissions of the impregnat Ayre Woâ—ke then my faith by thy great energy Faith upon others warme with charitie The coldnesse of the times to fructifie By its diffusive vertuous qualitie Rise Lord and sympathetically encline To turne to thee thy enemies and mine KNowledge is sweet and bitter faire and lame A great impotor body fram'd of Ayre A chatting flattering and self-painted Dame More in conceite then reall beautie faire How justly could I raise a mutiny Against our self-deceivings till I finde Our errors are not worth the scrutiny Nor truths true subjects of a sensuall mind God found us in our losse and selfe-bred stormes And with his light his Port exhibited Us to disbryer crown'd himselfe with thornes And made us rich in wares prohibited Forbeare beleeve and love is all hee craves All other knowledge is as false as vaine Wee foole our selves and make our selves true slaves To our false dotage faith alone is gaine Thy constant love oh Lord is all my ayme All other affectations I disclaime LOrd I desire my contract to make good What e're befalls should I a loser prove How e're things passe as they are understood Wee cannot lose if wee can say wee love Though as wee feare so thou shouldest prove offended Though vitious longings satisfied would cure Though I could seise what fancy e're pretended Yet would I stoope to nothing but thy lure Charme what thou canst false world deafe is my eare Thou Lord alone canst fill my greedy heart No other object have my hopes or feare Nature adieu for I will live by Art Lord make me Master in thy Arts divine That this worlds Sophistry I may elude Could I as well demonstrate as define Solve as distinguish vice should not obtrude It selfe for vertue I would make appeare The height of pleasure is thy love and feare MY selfe converted Lord as thou hast will'd Others I would confirme and draw to thee That here more perfect though not yet fulfill'd Thy Lawes obedience and our joyes might bee My sinnes and sufferings my compassion breed To see soules not maligne bewitcht by sinne Let thy wounds Sympathy make their hearts bleed Knock hard O Lord and they will let thee in Their soules have cost thee all as deare as mine Vouchsafe that they may equall favour find Hadst thou not forc'd mee I had ne're been thine Open their eyes or they must still be blind But Lord thy will be done best time thou knowest Thy justice or thy mercies to impart Thou ever in thy favours overflowest Thy justice keepe for the malicious heart Charitie binds us to seeke others good How e're thy will and grace have firmely stood NOr Cynthia Starres nor Roses Violets Nightingales Wrens nor our heart-charming Queene Can so surpasse the vulgar delicates That shine and are in triviall beauties seene As doe thy pleasures Lord the worlds delights Which seeme to feed but leave us hungry still Suggesting false distracted appetites Which satisfied with gall and wind do fill Poore flattering fading pleasures sweet to none But groveling Palats Bubles of the minde Compar'd with them you shew how short you come By the discountenanc'd guilty shame you find As is the Galaxia in the skies A light from many hidden lights proceeding Such constant confluence of joy doth rise From Gods sweet influence of grace succeeding Lord guide me in a refluence to thee And worldly affluence my scorne shall bee OH Lord I know I may be thought to sing Triumph before full victory obtain'd But since thy pardon hath vouchsaf'd to bring Mee to thy feast of conscience unstain'd I nothing doubt mercy compleat to finde Why then my soule art thou perplexed still Stere cleare O Lord and pacifie my minde Since thee to celebrate is all my will But my extent it doth too farre exceed To tell the wonders thou hast wrought for mee Accept oh Lord endeavour for the deed My best expressions must come short of thee Then rest my soule repose in God alone Hee is thy countenance helper and thy Lord His mercy never faileth to his owne Such as beleeve and trust unto his word Yet Lord I care not so thy favour last Though Taper-like I spread my light and wast Or though I like the poore flame-courting flie Seeking thy glory singe my wings and die PRevail'd thou hast my God and made me thine A stubborne knotty peece thou hast mee prov'd Seaventy times seven at least thou didst refine And pardon mee by thy example mov'd To labour others good forgive their ill With courage and with love invincible Wee perish Lord except thou vanquish still And worke us to thy will reducible Great to thy Rebells Lord is thy compassion Which doth to us part in thy conquest yeeld In thee wee triumph over sinnes and passion And chase the strongest lusts out of the field Some live in sinne yet find thy grace at last To thee repentance never comes too late I in thy conflicts all my life have past A moment could not well mee subjugate The hardest conquest is the greatest glory 'T is not the course but end that crownes the story Advance O Lord thy conquest still in mee That I may find sweet triumph still in thee QUarrell no more my caâ—ping soule but yeeld Yeeld to thy mighty conquerer and know 'T is for thy good nature hath lost the field And that thy selfe thou to his grace dost owe. Thou hast thy selfe enrol'd into his pay Nature was false and paid thee in base coyne Oh doe not now thy selfe and him betray But fight against his enemies and thine Undisciplin'd licentious was thy course In thy first warfare natures stinging want And emptie pay led thee from bad to worse Sharking thy pleasure was thy food was scant In shiftings and in change thou didst subsist Thy purchases dissolv'd in wast and griefe Oh joy no more in doing what thou list But joy in thy well disciplining Chiefe Happy who are to his command resign'd All else is as the blind to lead the blind REckon we doe without our Host if wee Dispose Oh Lord our wayes irregulate In carnall appetites neglecting thee Sole Founder and upholder of our State As little reckon I as care to live Thou hast cross-byast me to this worlds pleasure Nature hath been as frank to me to give As unto others but another measure Hath
excellent statuary is said to have composed such a Minerva and such a figure of himself in the center of her Target that the whole work bearing upon it it could be no lesse permanent then the main peece I have here presumed to place you as a precious peece of preservation unto me The abridgement of my story shall now follow like a cloudy storm after a faire Sun-shine that I have been most unhappily miserable more then the outward face of nature or fortune discover in me is known to all that know me but true and secret causes are so obscure that it hath been even to my self a most intricate disquisition to finde them Yet besides what may be attributed to the Starres Fate Complexion and an over-ruling hand as in former papers though disorderly I have made to appeare They may be partly reduced to an unseasonable and Marriage accidentall inordinate and indiscreet use of Treacle long and unfavourable dysaster in respect of the Court where I had my Introduction a fortune unproportionable to my quality spirit and ingaged condition A minde curious as well to its own furniture as election of course and no course obvious or faire unto me especially in the distracting ambiguous considerations of my seats and above all for without that I could as well as another have passed over all the rest a super-induced Melancholy from the abuse of such Treacle which wholly altered and disanimated me urging retirednesse study thoughts care and a distastednesse upon me Physick instead of releeving me was my bane over-drawing of blood and over-working my active minde brought and held me in such a lownesse and consumption of spirits whereunto also an over-slender dyet for feare of fatnesse much conduced that howsoever a free boldnesse of spirits and conversation was naturall unto me I have been forced to live so farre under my naturall rate and faculties of Soule that I wanted spirits to counterlook a Cat confusion of eyes memory and gesture with infinite other incident malignant symptomes were the pernicious effects of my disorder my naturall strength and violence of spirit aggravated my disease bred my continuall mischief and by the same strength and Gods better grace I as indefatigably resisted and subsisted long and dangerous Feavours took advantage upon the matter and occasion of my infirmity other desperate accidents in fortune I suffered and much more then all this in the contrarieties of my contracted condition and misgoverned errours It hath pleased God as extraordinarily to support me as by extraordinary and strange wayes to confound deject and bring me towards him No man ever became extream bad in an instant supernaturall goodnes is harder to effect Being now at length throughly conscious of my infirmitie and violence in all my affections and as throughly wrought upon by Gods good Spirit and grace that which I put in execution remained onely fit and necessary for me which is as this King of France hath lately in consideration of extraordinary troubles and in them as great protections of God towards him and his people solemnly committed and devoted himselfe and his kingdome unto the protection of our blessed Lady though somewhat preposterously so have I wholly resigned and consecrated my selfe to God having withall put off or made indifferent unto mee all common and worldly affections and ambitions by meanes whereof I am now as quiet as I have formerly been agitated and troubled abstinence is often lesse difficult then moderation diversion is a powerfull meanes of cure active affections must finde a subject and there is none so happy none so satisfactory as God not to bee affected with goodnesse is not to bee affected with him and to contemne or bee insensible of beautie were to slight one of his Master peeces such onely of my ancient concomitances I cast not off vertue is ever to be prised but most when fairest set Grace goodnesse and beautie are his brightest beames concurring they move to veneration and delight My thoughts shall at this time no further follow such an alluring subject what I would be and resolve I declare what I have been I cannot help possibly I could not many solutions are brought against the arguments of Fate which more confound themselves then avoid it Let Fate be as it will the understanding rises from the senses and the will from it sucâ— constituted causes must produce such effects right elections must needs bee as difficult as happy our passions give tincture to our judgement as a coloured pane of glasse to the Suns beames or as in the Jaundies we see all yellow they depend upon accidents and upon our complexion objects vary according as wee diversly approach them their very being consists often more in fancy and apprehension then truth they are involved in darknes and innumerable circumstances as hard to discerne as accommodate in such circumstances they hourely vary and wee as much It is hard for two ships in motion to hit the one the other it is true that some see clearer and are more circumspect then others yet old and long experienced counsellors are often rejected as the worst resolvers they apprehend too much chance and boldnesse give often the best successe chance according to us holds a predominancy but God is all in all Happinesse and tranquillitie have no other true center or circumference my Spirits naturally working and violent were incapable of rest had I not found it in his grace and favour to mee and my totall surrender unto him Faith is the sole Catholicon and generall Antidote against worldly perturbations Hee hath wonderfully exempted me from scorne from want and all great infirmitie He hath satisfied all my reasonable affectations even to this of writing wherein I have so disburdened my selfe that though it bee hard to write truely and not inconveniently or any thing to the full satisfaction either of others or my selfe yet I have done enough to resolve to withdraw my selfe from it confining my selfe hereafter to write nothing but necessary letters and subscribe my selfe Your Ladiships most humble and faithfull servant Noble Sir YOur late request which was to me an obliging command makes me send you that peece which you honored with your pretended conversion I never thought it any thing till now and now I make it yours that it may receive some further vertue of operation from you and seeing I finde you a proposition convertible I presume to lend you another peece of simple conversion It consists of a few begging verses if you find them blind impute it to their hasty and zealous production They beg a hand from God a favorable eye from you from him fatherly from you friendly correction they need it from you and the lesse you need from them the more your happinesse and their obligation I submit them and my selfe to you as Your faithfull servant TO you whose sincere Faith to God and Christian religion good affection towards mee and good discretion and judgement in all things are
so good in that kinde that it was impossible for me to become pleased therein to forbeare as I have done a long time In this particular which hath been more then most troublesome unto me Fortune according to her custome hath plaid double with me offering me on the one side most casually Grounds in my hands close by my house well-wooded and Park-like which I confesse much surprized my fancy therein Yet on the other side such varieties of perswasion for greater lesse good bad dry or wet Ground wayes thorow or not some neighbours Grounds to be taken in or no and whether or no they might be had difficulty of paling and carriage which I hate for though I love not trouble yet I enduâ—e my own more willingly then of my Friends and Neighbours After these and many other crosse points of offers and retractings of Neighbours and such like I have been led by degrees aliud agens besides my meaning to lay out a small yet sufficient peece of Ground for houshold provision of Venison a Garden to keep me from beging so neer dry fertile pleasant in view convenient and commodious that I would scarsely wish it other it was as it were marked out unto me and for my purpose Yet blinde as I was divers and crosse considerations which this world and I abound in kept me so long from discerning to lay hold of it that I scorn my senses and my self and almost condemn my self to all that I have suffered in my non-sense The inconvenience of pale is avoided for I have enough at hand I am still Master of my Woods my Ground found for Winter and Summer and the goodnesse of it makes it much in little nor would I wish it greater great inconveniences attend a great Park it is a kinde of Whore much in fancy and often kept more for others use then our own it is a wilde Mistris and courted by a kinde of wilde people fiercely riding this way and that way with great hoopings and outcryes upon a very slight errand Our forefathers were not yet without reason who meeting with a world and wildernesse of woods and wastes assigned an otherwise uselesse part thereof to Parkes and Forests It is not so with us want of Tymber and Woods will tame our wildenesse and reduce us to an usefull compasse Never was Land bought dearer then I have paid for my own may house and land prove more happy to my Successours how many years of my life it hath cost me I know not nor much as the world is care This and much more retirednesse Melancholy and Fortune have brought upon me yet considering how ill a wandring or publique course of life would suite with mee I choose rather to suffer and compose as well as I may all incommodities within my selfe then to expose my selfe to such as others finde and thrust themselves into abroad and which would bee to mee more intolerable Quiet is not ill bought at any reasonable rate Vt habeas quietum tempus perde aliquid de tuo jure is a saying which if the Spaniard had practised even to the quitting of the 17. Provinces or I in sitting downe by some forbearances wee might possibly have been both more at ease God hath given him a strong state of dominions and me of body and mind to our owne as well trouble as subsistence Hee maintaines his strength by exercise and so have I done by extraordinary motion agitation and distensions such as to a man of an evener minde and fortune then mine are I confidently affirme shall keepe in health strength free from great inconvenience of colds feavers fulnesse or putrefaction of humors c. vigor of spirits and length of life better then Lessius or Cornarus their staticall diet which is most unnaturall servile subject by their owne confession to great distemper upon the least change or excesse whereas the other comports with any tolerable diet prescribed in reason rather for Monkes Hermites Votaries and persons of a sedentary life then such as are to use the world and labour Thus much have I written in this early of the morning as hastily and wildly and perhaps to as little purpose as Foresters follow their chase which to my owne better instruction and use of my selfe and mine may it please God to blesse Amen December the 7. 1639. Potius inserere virtutem quam disserere de virtute Postscript IF I write wildly and erroneously yet my follies are short and the shortest are the best I had rather write without method and abrupt then as many doe in long intricate and often mistaken distributions and divisions as tedious and unprofitable in some one subject as I am confused and wild in change and varying my scenes Thus Bos lassus fortius sigit pedem and if my soule cannot digest and indure its owne weight strength and discernings it must suffer Perplexed condition of our sophisticated and preternaturall life the wayes of nature are obvious easie certaine The Swallow Crane c. know their seasons and vary not in their course or building of their nests where the most ingenuous and rightaffecting soules amongst us are ever to seeke and even at the best which I call with the illumination of supernaturall grace vexed with our owne scruples and fancies and either forced from the world and natures libertie of delights or like Lot to have their righteous soules contristate with a vaine crooked perverse and wicked conversation IF my peeces appeare not all of a peece constant to themselves but so diversified that I ordinarily fall into a superfetation or various births of male and female at one graviditie If I superinduce and contract into little roome matters of severall and important consideration such as might otherwise have been beaten out into particular and large treatises I hope you will bee indulgent to the sparing of labour as well yours as mine finding in your power to extend or remit your owne either by receiving my coyne for currant or bringing it to the balance or test of a farther yet favorable examination not forgetting that allowance which I have often begged to my acknowledged infirmitie defects confusion and precipitation in their conception and production Passus graviora dabit Deus his quoque finem FINIS EXTRAVAGANTS Dream IF you are at leisure I will tell you my mornings dream which was that in the quality of a Soliciter for Old England in a cause that concerned him for limme life land and liberty which were all drawn to stake by I know not what Promooter I cast my eye on a Friend as I rode into York with the Chiefe Justice of Assize there to be held and desired him to help me to some good Counsellors to plead for me he lookt about him and spyed some portlike men riding on Scotch pads but said they were not for me for they favour'd of the others near them were on hard Scotch saddles but had long since given desperate the cause of Old