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A41123 Remains of that reverend & faithful servant of Jesus Christ, Mr. William Fenner, late minister of Rochford in Essex ... now compared with his own notes and published by Simeon Ash, William Taylor, Matthew Poole, John Jackson and John Seabrooke ... Fenner, William, 1600-1640.; Ashe, Simeon, d. 1662. 1657 (1657) Wing F696; ESTC R7304 478,746 332

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and so full of zeal for him though all men forsake thee yet will not I he thought he was so affected that he could compare with all the Apostles and Disciples of Jesus Christ and go beyond them all but afterwards when Christ asked him Peter lovest thou me see his answer Joh. 21.15 his answer was nakedly Lord thou knowest that I love thee he would make no more comparisons though Christ put him upon it there yet he would not be brought to compare any more Now was he less affected towards Christ no but he was less presumptuous Fifthly Activeness of natural disposition may make a man seem to be more affected then indeed he is for a man the more active his nature is and the more spirits he hath the more stirring he hath a man that hath such a disposition will go further then another of a slower spirit there is a great deal more grace required to make an heavy dull natured man to speak a word for God then to make a cholerick man strike a blow for God mens natures differ some men are more active naturally may be one man is full of activity and stirring another man is of a dull disposition will you say this man is deader then he no this man may have more life of grace then he it is as if one man should swim with the stream and another against the stream he that swims with the stream will more easily swim a mile then he that swims against the stream will swim half a mile will you say that this man cannot swim so well as the other no he may be a better swimmer of the twain for this is the thing we are not to judge of the life of our grace by what we do but by what labour we take in doing as the Apostle saith remembring without ceasing your work of faith and labour of love 1 Thes 1.3 may be another man is of a more loving nature then this man but the man that is more unkinde naturally and harsh-natured he labours a thousand times more abundantly then the other who hath most grace of love now the other hath most natural love but this man hath more grace of love as Paul proves he had the life of grace in him because he laboured more abundantly then they all it is not what thou doest but what thou laborest to do he that swims down the stream doth not labour if he should do nothing but stir his hands and feet without any labour the stream will carry him so when a man hath nature to help him he need not labour much but when a man must fetch all out of the hard flint how is he fain to labour there thou mayst try the life of thy affections not by what thou prayest but by what thou labourest in prayer not by what thou remembrest at a Sermon but though thou hast a blockish memory how dost thou labour to remember so it is not the not doing of sin but the labouring against sin hereby thou mayst know whither they zeal and affection be abated in thee So again for a mans self may be he was more active heretofore had a more nimble spirit and temper of body now he is grown more sad and melancholy his head is distempered and grown more weak his memory fails and his understanding decayes that quick disposition of his body is taken down and he cannot do as he did before is the man therefore not so quickned as he was before is he grown more dead may be the man complains certainly he hath cause to suspect himself and he doth not think he is right formerly he could remember a Sermon be fixed in meditation be attentive at the word be fervent in prayer and put forth himself in this fashion now he cannot he was so lively before now he hath not the same activity and therefore begins to call all into question certainly all is not right I answer this doth not follow it is true in many a man it is the deadness of his heart and the decayedness of his spiritual estate that causeth this but it doth not follow that it is so with thee but the cause is this may be thou hast worn out thy tools therefore no marvel thou canst not work so well as formerly take a skilful Musitian whose instrument is crackt and marred he cannot make so good musick upon this instrument as he could when it was sound doth it follow he hath lost his skill no give this man a sound instrument as he had before and he will play as well as ever all our operations not only external but also internal do much depend upon the disposition of the body as for meditation may be when the body was lively and active a man could fix his meditations upon a thing now it is weakned he cannot may be he hath the same desire and delight as he had before but he cannot do it so may be he hath as great a desire as ever to remember the word but his memory is gone so may be he hath as great a desire to put forth himself in any ordinance of God as ever in all his life but his body will not bear it I say the spirits depend much upon the body you may see this in natural operations let a mans eyes fail will any man say that the soul of that man is less able to see then it was no the soul is as able to see in a blind man as in a seeing man in an old man whose eyes fail him as in a young man that hath the quickest sight if this man had an excellent eye given him he would see as well as any body else the soul is able to do it but it wants a tool so many Saints of God cannot do many duties as they were wont not for want of love and zeal and affections but for want of tools it is said 2 Sam. 21.16 that when David waxed old they would not let him go out into the field did they look upon David now as less worthy then before no they looked upon him as more worthy then before the text saith they looked upon him as the very light of Israel though he could not fight for Israel so well as he did before so you shall see many a godly man and reverend father upon his death bed shews no great matter in his dying what because he is dead and is not the man he was no but because he hath worn out his tools he is not the man in regard of operation though he hath the same affections he had formerly Sixthly Extraordinary assistance may make a man seem to be more lively and quickned then indeed he is for God doth assist his people extraordinarily in their beginning 't is true some of his people he doth extraordinarily assist all their life long but he doth not usually do it he doth choose rather extraordinarily to strive and help his people at the first and afterwards