into_o our_o heart_n 46.8_o isa_n 46.8_o and_o may_v there_o find_v he_o for_o he_o so_o withdraw_v himself_o as_o that_o here_o he_o be_v still_o he_o will_v not_o stay_v long_o with_o we_o and_o yet_o he_o have_v not_o leave_v we_o as_o also_o thither_o he_o depart_v whence_o he_o never_o part_v because_o the_o world_n be_v make_v by_o he_o and_o in_o this_o world_n he_o be_v and_o yet_o come_v into_o this_o world_n to_o save_v sinner_n to_o who_o my_o soul_n now_o also_o confess_v that_o he_o may_v heal_v it_o for_o it_o have_v sin_v o_o you_o son_n of_o man_n 4.4_o ps_n 4.4_o how_o long_o so_o heavy_a heart_a and_o be_v it_o possible_a after_o this_o descent_n of_o life_n itself_o to_o you_o that_o you_o will_v not_o ascend_v to_o it_o and_o live_v but_o whither_o ascend_v you_o then_o when_o you_o set_v up_o yourselves_o on_o high_a and_o turn_v your_o face_n against_o heaven_n first_o descend_v that_o so_o you_o may_v ascend_v and_o ascend_v to_o god_n who_o fall_v before_o by_o 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attract_v we_o and_o i_o mark_v narrow_o and_o perceive_v that_o in_o the_o body_n themselves_o the_o whole_a feature_n as_o it_o be_v of_o they_o be_v one_o thing_n from_o which_o they_o be_v call_v fair_a and_o another_o thing_n their_o decency_n and_o fitness_n namely_o as_o they_o be_v apt_o suit_v to_o some_o other_o thing_n as_o a_o part_n of_o the_o body_n be_v to_o the_o whole_a or_o a_o shoe_n to_o the_o foot_n and_o the_o like_a and_o these_o speculation_n spring_v still_o more_o in_o my_o mind_n from_o the_o multiplicity_n of_o thought_n i_o compose_v certain_a book_n de_fw-fr pulchro_fw-la &_o apto_fw-la of_o fair_a and_o fit_a as_o i_o remember_v two_o or_o three_o god_n thou_o know_v for_o i_o have_v forget_v for_o i_o have_v they_o not_o by_o i_o but_o they_o be_v straggle_v abroad_o i_o know_v not_o whither_o chap._n fourteen_o dedicate_v to_o hierius_n a_o roman_a rhetorician_n much_o admire_v by_o he_o only_o upon_o report_n but_o what_o be_v it_o that_o move_v i_o o_o lord_n my_o god_n to_o address_v these_o book_n to_o hierius_n a_o rhetorician_n in_o rome_n not_o know_v to_o i_o by_o face_n and_o yet_o love_v by_o i_o for_o the_o same_o of_o his_o learning_n which_o be_v very_o eminent_a and_o some_o speech_n of_o his_o likewise_o i_o have_v hear_v and_o they_o have_v please_v i_o but_o please_v i_o far_o the_o more_o because_o they_o please_v other_o who_o much_o admire_a and_o magnify_v the_o man_n that_o he_o a_o syrian_a by_o nation_n first_o train_v up_o in_o the_o grecian_a eloquence_n have_v become_v so_o admirable_a a_o master_n also_o in_o the_o latin_a and_o so_o know_v in_o philosophy_n a_o man_n be_v *_o praise_n and_o present_o upon_o it_o though_o never_o see_v *_o love_a enter_v this_o love_n then_o into_o the_o heart_n of_o the_o hearer_n from_o the_o mouth_n of_o the_o commender_n nothing_o so_o but_o from_o one_o lover_n another_o be_v incense_v to_o love_n for_o hence_o be_v he_o love_v that_o be_v commend_v when_o he_o that_o praise_v be_v suppose_v to_o extol_v he_o with_o a_o undissemble_a heart_n that_o be_v when_o one_o that_o love_v commend_n he_o for_o so_o i_o then_o love_v man_n according_a to_o the_o estimation_n of_o man_n and_o not_o thou_o o_o my_o god_n which_o be_v never_o deceive_v but_o yet_o why_o love_v i_o he_o not_o as_o i_o do_v some_o other_o a_o famous_a chariotier_n or_o huntsman_n etc._n etc._n that_o be_v much_o extol_v by_o popular_a applause_n but_o with_o a_o far_o different_a and_o more_o serious_a affection_n and_o so_o as_o myself_o also_o desire_v the_o same_o commendation_n for_o neither_o can_v i_o endure_v that_o myself_o shall_v be_v so_o commend_v or_o love_v as_o stage-player_n be_v who_o yet_o i_o both_o commend_v and_o love_v yet_o will_v i_o choose_v myself_o rather_o to_o be_v obscure_a than_o in_o such_o a_o manner_n note_v and_o even_o rather_o to_o be_v hate_v than_o in_o such_o a_o manner_n love_v where_o be_v the_o plummet_n that_o give_v motion_n to_o so_o many_o heterogeneous_a and_o divers_a love_n disposed-of_a in_o one_o soul_n what_o be_v it_o that_o i_o love_v in_o another_o man_n which_o same_o thing_n again_o unless_o i_o hate_v i_o shall_v not_o loathe_v it_o in_o myself_o and_o repel_v it_o from_o i_o though_o in_o a_o like_a condition_n both_o of_o we_o be_v man_n indeed_o a_o good_a horse_n be_v love_v by_o one_o who_o yet_o will_v not_o be_v the_o thing_n he_o love_v but_o we_o can_v say_v so_o of_o a_o actor_n communicate_v with_o we_o in_o nature_n can_v i_o then_o love_v in_o a_o man_n something_o i_o will_v not_o be_v though_o i_o be_o a_o man_n man_n himself_o be_v a_o great_a deep_a the_o very_a hair_n of_o who_o head_n be_v all_o number_v by_o thou_o o_o lord_n nor_o be_v any_o of_o they_o want_v unto_o thou_o and_o yet_o those_o hair_n can_v more_o easy_o be_v number_v than_o can_v his_o affection_n and_o the_o motion_n of_o his_o heart_n but_o this_o rhetorician_n be_v of_o those_o who_o i_o so_o love_v as_o that_o i_o wish_v also_o the_o like_a who_o stray_v thus_o 4.14_o ephes_n 4.14_o swell_v with_o ambition_n and_o whirl_v about_o wiâ—h_v every_o wind_n yet_o all_o the_o while_n be_v steer_v by_o thou_o though_o extreme_a secret_o and_o whence_o know_v i_o this_o and_o whence_o so_o confident_o confess_v i_o unto_o thou_o that_o i_o love_v he_o more_o from_o the_o love_n of_o those_o who_o commend_v he_o than_o from_o the_o thing_n for_o which_o he_o be_v commend_v from_o hence_o because_o have_v the_o same_o man_n disparage_v he_o to_o i_o and_o relate_v the_o same_o thing_n they_o commend_v in_o he_o with_o contempt_n and_o scorn_n i_o have_v not_o be_v so_o take_v with_o he_o yet_o certain_o those_o thing_n have_v neither_o be_v another_o man_n nor_o the_o man_n another_o from_o himself_o but_o only_o another_o the_o affection_n of_o the_o relater_n see_v in_o what_o a_o condition_n lie_v the_o feeble_a soul_n that_o be_v not_o yet_o fix_v upon_o the_o basis_n of_o truth_n as_o the_o unconstant_a gale_n of_o tongue_n blow_v from_o the_o breast_n of_o the_o opinative_a so_o be_v she_o carry_v and_o turn_v drive_v forward_o and_o drive_v back_o again_o and_o her_o eye_n be_v becloud_v and_o the_o truth_n not_o discern_v and_o yet_o behold_v it_o stand_v before_o we_o and_o it_o seem_v to_o i_o a_o matter_n of_o great_a importance_n if_o my_o stile_n and_o my_o study_n may_v be_v know_v to_o such_o a_o man_n which_o if_o by_o he_o they_o be_v approve_v i_o shall_v have_v be_v still_o more_o inflame_v if_o dis-esteemed_n my_o heart_n have_v be_v grievous_o wound_v be_v altogether_o void_a and_o empty_a of_o thy_o solidity_n yet_o that_o pulchrum_n &_o aptum_fw-la of_o which_o i_o write_v to_o he_o be_v not_o conceive_v by_o i_o without_o much_o delight_n and_o the_o subtlety_n of_o those_o contemplation_n i_o myself_o admire_v before_o they_o have_v another_o to_o praise_v they_o chap._n xv._o his_o late_a imagination_n concern_v these_o thing_n be_v not_o yet_o enlighten_v by_o the_o scripture_n but_o the_o cause_n and_o hinge_n of_o such_o a_o weighty_a business_n i_o have_v not_o as_o yet_o study_v in_o that_o thy_o sacred_a science_n o_o thou_o omnipotent_a 136.4_o psal_n 136.4_o who_o alone_o work_v all_o these_o wonder_n and_o my_o mind_n range_v through_o corporeal_a form_n and_o fair_a i_o define_v and_o with_o corporeal_a instance_n illustrate_v *_o that_o which_o be_v so_o absolute_o of_o itself_o fit_a *_o that_o which_o be_v decent_a and_o graceful_a from_o application_n to_o another_o an_o i_o cast_v my_o thought_n also_o upon_o the_o nature_n of_o the_o mind_n and_o there_o the_o false_a opinion_n
sing_v the_o psalm_n 101._o psal_n 101._o misericordiam_fw-la &_o judicium_fw-la cantabo_fw-la tibi_fw-la domine_fw-la the_o response_n be_v make_v by_o all_o we_o of_o the_o family_n and_o many_o christian_a brethren_n and_o religious_a woman_n out_o of_o the_o town_n hear_v what_o the_o matter_n be_v come_v to_o we_o and_o whilst_o those_o who_o office_n it_o be_v after_o the_o usual_a manner_n take_v care_n of_o the_o corpse_n and_o funeral_n i_o go_v aside_o in_o a_o place_n where_o most_o convenient_o i_o may_v discourse_v to_o those_o who_o think_v it_o not_o fit_a to_o leave_v i_o then_o alone_o such_o thing_n as_o be_v suitable_a to_o the_o occasion_n and_o with_o that_o balm_n of_o thy_o truth_n seek_v to_o mitigate_v my_o grievous_a pain_n well_o know_v to_o thou_o but_o hide_v from_o they_o who_o diligent_o hearken_v to_o what_o i_o say_v and_o think_v i_o to_o be_v without_o sense_n of_o sorrow_n whilst_o i_o o_o lord_n meanwhile_n in_o thy_o ear_n where_o none_o of_o they_o can_v hear_v i_o much_o chide_v the_o softness_n of_o my_o affection_n and_o force_v back_o the_o flux_n of_o my_o grief_n and_o sometime_o it_o yield_v to_o i_o for_o a_o little_a and_o then_o again_o with_o great_a violence_n reflow_v upon_o i_o yet_o not_o so_o far_o as_o to_o the_o burst_v out_o of_o tear_n or_o change_v my_o countenance_n but_o very_o sensible_a i_o be_v of_o this_o pressure_n i_o suffer_v within_o and_o then_o again_o because_o this_o extreme_o displease_v i_o that_o humane_a thing_n shall_v have_v such_o power_n upon_o i_o which_o according_a to_o the_o lot_n of_o our_o mutable_a condition_n and_o the_o appoint_a method_n of_o their_o succession_n must_v needs_o fall_v out_o with_o yet_o another_o sorrow_n i_o lament_v this_o my_o sorrow_n and_o so_o become_v afflict_v with_o a_o double_a grief_n when_o also_o the_o body_n be_v carry_v to_o burial_n i_o go_v i_o return_v without_o tear_n neither_o in_o those_o prayer_n we_o pour_v forth_o unto_o thou_o when_o the_o sacrifice_n of_o our_o ransom_n be_v offer_v unto_o thou_o for_o she_o the_o body_n be_v set_v down_o by_o the_o grave_a side_n before_o the_o interment_n thereof_o as_o the_o custom_n there_o be_v neither_o in_o those_o prayer_n i_o say_v shed_v i_o any_o tear_n but_o all_o the_o whole_a day_n be_v i_o notwithstanding_o in_o secret_a grievous_o sad_a and_o with_o a_o trouble_a spirit_n beg_v of_o thou_o to_o heal_v my_o sorrow_n and_o thou_o will_v not_o do_v it_o i_o suppose_v to_o show_v i_o even_o by_o this_o one_o experiment_n the_o strong_a bond_n of_o any_o thing_n we_o be_v long_o accustom_v to_o even_o against_o all_o the_o force_n of_o a_o mind_n which_o now_o be_v no_o more_o feed_v with_o any_o of_o these_o deceive_a consolation_n it_o then_o also_o seem_v good_a unto_o i_o to_o go_v the_o bath_n and_o wash_v myself_o have_v hear_v that_o this_o name_n 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d 〈◊〉_d be_v give_v it_o by_o the_o greek_n from_o its_o help_a to_o drive_v away_o the_o anxiety_n of_o spirit_n yet_o i_o confess_v unto_o thou_o father_n of_o orphan_n such_o be_v i_o when_o wash_v as_o before_o neither_o have_v the_o sweat_n of_o my_o body_n carry_v away_o with_o it_o the_o grief_n of_o my_o mind_n after_o this_o i_o sleep_v and_o awake_v and_o find_v now_o my_o sorrow_n not_o a_o little_a mitigate_v and_o as_o i_o be_v alone_o in_o bed_n i_o call_v to_o mind_n those_o most_o true_a verse_n of_o thy_o servant_n ambrose_n tu_fw-la es_fw-la enim_fw-la deus_fw-la creator_n omnium_fw-la polique_a rector_n vestiens_fw-la diem_fw-la decoro_fw-la lumine_fw-la noctem_fw-la soporis_fw-la gratiâ_fw-la artus_n solutos_fw-la ut_fw-la quies_fw-la reddat_fw-la laboris_fw-la usui_fw-la mentesque_fw-la fessas_fw-la allevet_fw-la luctusque_fw-la solvat_fw-la anxios_fw-la o_o god_n the_o great_a world_n architect_n who_o do_v heaven_n roll_a orb_n direct_v clothing_n the_o day_n with_o beauteous_a light_n and_o with_o sweet_a slumber_n silent_a night_n when_o stretch_v forth_o limb_n new_a vigour_n gain_v from_o rest_n new_a labour_n to_o sustain_v when_o anxious_a mind_n dismiss_v their_o care_n and_o gnaw_a grief_n forget_v be_v but_o by_o and_o by_o the_o former_a remembrance_n return_v afresh_o into_o my_o mind_n *_o of_o this_o thy_o handmaid_n and_o *_o of_o all_o her_o conversation_n so_o religious_a and_o holy_a towards_o thou_o so_o affectionate_a and_o observant_a towards_o we_o of_o which_o i_o be_v now_o all_o on_o a_o sudden_a destitute_a and_o i_o have_v a_o mind_n now_o to_o weep_v in_o thy_o sight_n concern_v she_o and_o for_o she_o and_o concern_v myself_o and_o for_o myself_o and_o i_o give_v a_o free_a course_n to_o the_o tear_n which_o i_o have_v suppress_v to_o run_v out_o as_o much_o as_o they_o please_v bathe_v my_o heart_n with_o they_o and_o solace_v myself_o in_o they_o because_o thou_o only_o hear_v and_o not_o man_n who_o may_v perhaps_o proud_o misinterpret_v those_o my_o lament_n and_o now_o o_o lord_n i_o confess_v these_o thing_n unto_o thou_o in_o write_v read_v they_o that_o will_v and_o interpret_v they_o as_o he_o please_v and_o if_o such_o shall_v discover_v it_o a_o fault_n in_o i_o that_o i_o thus_o weep_v for_o my_o mother_n some_o small_a part_n of_o a_o hour_n for_o my_o mother_n late_o dead_a from_o my_o sight_n who_o weep_v for_o i_o so_o many_o year_n that_o i_o may_v live_v in_o thy_o sight_n let_v he_o not_o deride_v i_o for_o it_o but_o rather_o if_o he_o abound_v in_o charity_n assist_v i_o himself_o with_o his_o tear_n for_o this_o my_o sin_n unto_o thou_o the_o common_a father_n of_o we_o all_o brethren_n in_o thy_o christ_n chap._n xiii_o his_o prayer_n for_o his_o decease_a mother_n monica_n and_o father_n patricius_n and_o now_o o_o our_o god_n i_o with_o a_o heart_n perfect_o heal_v of_o that_o wound_n in_o which_o a_o carnal_a affection_n perhaps_o may_v seem_v too_o much_o engage_v do_v power_n out_o before_o thou_o in_o behalf_n of_o that_o thy_o servant_n another_o sort_n of_o tear_n flow_v out_o of_o a_o trouble_a spirit_n from_o the_o consideration_n of_o the_o peril_n of_o every_o soul_n die_v in_o adam_n although_o she_o revive_v in_o christ_n even_o before_o her_o releasement_n from_o this_o sinful_a flesh_n have_v so_o live_v as_o that_o thy_o name_n be_v much_o praise_v both_o in_o her_o faith_n and_o virtue_n yet_o dare_v i_o not_o affirm_v from_o the_o time_n that_o thou_o do_v regenerate_v she_o by_o baptism_n that_o no_o word_n fall_v from_o her_o mouth_n contrary_a to_o thy_o command_n and_o i_o find_v it_o pronounce_v by_o the_o truth_n thy_o son_n if_o any_o one_o shall_v say_v unto_o his_o brother_n fool_z he_o shall_v be_v in_o danger_n of_o hellfire_n 5.22_o mat._n 5.22_o and_o woe_n be_v even_o to_o the_o praisable_a life_n of_o man_n if_o thou_o shall_v examine_v it_o with_o mercy_n lay_v aside_o but_o because_o thou_o make_v not_o strict_a enquiry_n after_o sin_n therefore_o we_o have_v a_o confident_a hope_n to_o find_v some_o place_n of_o indulgence_n with_o thou_o and_o on_o the_o other_o side_n whosoever_o he_o be_v that_o can_v reckon_v up_o his_o true_a merit_n unto_o thou_o what_o account_v he_o unto_o thou_o but_o thy_o own_o gift_n oh_o then_o that_o man_n will_v know_v themselves_o 1.31_o 1_o cor._n 1.31_o and_o that_o he_o that_o glori_v will_v glory_v in_o the_o lord_n i_o therefore_o o_o thou_o my_o praise_n and_o my_o life_n god_n of_o my_o heart_n set_v aside_o here_o her_o good_a deed_n for_o which_o with_o much_o rejoice_v i_o render_v thou_o thanks_o now_o become_v a_o petitioner_n to_o thou_o for_o the_o sin_n of_o that_o my_o mother_n hear_v thou_o i_o i_o beseech_v thou_o by_o that_o cure_n of_o our_o wound_n that_o hang_v upon_o the_o cross_n and_o that_o now_o sit_v at_o thy_o right_a hand_n intercede_v unto_o thou_o for_o we_o i_o know_v that_o she_o deal_v merciful_o and_o from_o her_o heart_n forgive_v to_o her_o debtor_n their_o trespass_n do_v thou_o likewise_o remit_v her_o debt_n to_o she_o if_o she_o have_v also_o contract_v some_o in_o those_o many_o year_n which_o she_o live_v after_o baptism_n forgive_v they_o o_o lord_n forgive_v they_o i_o beseech_v thou_o enter_v not_o with_o she_o into_o judgement_n 9.15_o jam._n 2.13_o mat_n 5.7_o rom._n 9.15_o but_o let_v thy_o mercy_n rejoice_v against_o judgement_n because_o thy_o word_n be_v true_a and_o thou_o have_v promise_v mercy_n to_o the_o merciful_a and_o yet_o that_o such_o be_v merciful_a thou_o give_v it_o unto_o they_o who_o have_v mercy_n on_o who_o thou_o will_v have_v mercy_n and_o show_v compassion_n on_o who_o thou_o will_v show_v compassion_n and_o i_o believe_v 108._o psal_n 119_o 108._o thou_o have_v already_o do_v this_o which_o i_o beg_v of_o thou_o but_o let_v these_o
unto_o thou_o he_o relate_v therefore_o after_o what_o manner_n that_o most_o learned_a old_a man_n and_o most_o expert_a in_o all_o the_o liberal_a science_n who_o have_v read_v digest_v and_o explain_v the_o work_n of_o so_o many_o philosopher_n the_o tutor_n to_o so_o many_o noble_a senator_n that_o for_o a_o monument_n of_o his_o excellency_n have_v erect_v his_o statue_n in_o the_o forum_n romanum_n which_o among_o the_o citizen_n of_o this_o world_n be_v account_v a_o great_a honour_n have_v be_v even_o to_o that_o age_n a_o worshipper_n of_o idol_n and_o a_o partaker_n of_o those_o sacrilegious_a devotion_n to_o which_o most_o of_o the_o roman_a nobility_n be_v so_o zealous_o addict_v that_o they_o now_o worship_v and_o number_v among_o their_o gâ—ds_n bark_v dog_n bark_v a_o egyptian_a god_n worship_v in_o the_o shape_n of_o a_o dog_n anubis_n and_o those_o other_o monstrous_a blood_n of_o deity_n which_o once_o be_v enemy_n to_o the_o roman_a state_n and_o which_o take_v up_o arm_n against_o neptune_n and_o venus_n and_o minerva_n her_o protector_n rome_n now_o supplicate_v and_o serve_v those_o deity_n also_o who_o she_o have_v conquer_v of_o all_o which_o age_v victorinus_n have_v for_o so_o many_o year_n be_v a_o most_o powerful_o eloquent_a patron_n and_o defender_n he_o relate_v i_o say_v in_o what_o manner_n after_o all_o this_o that_o old_a man_n be_v not_o ashamed_a to_o become_v a_o child_n of_o thy_o christ_n and_o a_o infant_n at_o thy_o font_n submit_v his_o neck_n to_o the_o yoke_n of_o thy_o humility_n and_o force_v his_o proud_a forehead_n to_o the_o reproach_n of_o the_o cross_n 18.9_o psal_n 18.9_o o_o lord_n lord_n who_o bow_v the_o heaven_n and_o come_v down_o who_o touch_v the_o mountain_n and_o they_o smoke_n with_o what_o sweet_a and_o secret_a attraction_n do_v thou_o insinuate_v thyself_o into_o that_o breast_n and_o become_v master_n of_o it_o he_o attentive_o read_v as_o simplicianus_n say_v the_o holy_a scripture_n and_o all_o the_o christian_n writing_n he_o careful_o seek_v out_o and_o examine_v and_o then_o say_v to_o simplicianus_n not_o public_o but_o secret_o as_o to_o a_o friend_n know_v that_o i_o be_o now_o a_o christian_a and_o he_o reply_v i_o will_v not_o believe_v it_o nor_o repure_v you_o such_o until_o i_o shall_v see_v you_o within_o the_o church_n of_o christ_n and_o the_o other_o in_o derision_n answer_v he_o again_o and_o be_v it_o wall_n then_o that_o make_v christian_n and_o often_o he_o say_v this_o that_o already_o he_o be_v a_o christian_a and_o sâ—mpliâ—ianus_n often_o iterate_v the_o same_o reply_n and_o as_o often_o be_v the_o jest_n of_o the_o wall_n return_v by_o he_o for_o he_o be_v afraid_a to_o displease_v his_o great_a friend_n those_o proud_a worshipper_n of_o devil_n from_o the_o high_a top_n of_o whoâ—e_n babilonâ—sh_a power_n 29.5_o psal_n 29.5_o as_o from_o cedar_n of_o libanus_n who_o the_o lord_n have_v not_o yet_o break_v he_o foresee_v great_a storm_n of_o wrath_n will_v fall_v upon_o he_o but_o afterward_o by_o continual_a read_n and_o meditate_v he_o gather_v more_o firmness_n and_o fear_v to_o be_v deny_v by_o christ_n before_o his_o holy_a angel_n if_o he_o fear_v to_o confess_v he_o before_o man_n 10.33_o mat._n 10.33_o and_o appear_v to_o himself_o guilty_a of_o a_o grievous_a crime_n if_o he_o shall_v be_v ashamed_a of_o the_o sacrament_n of_o the_o humility_n of_o thy_o eternal_a word_n and_o not_o ashamed_a of_o that_o sacrilegious_a worship_n of_o those_o proud_a devil_n of_o who_o be_v first_o a_o proud_a imitater_n he_o become_v also_o a_o worshipper_n he_o begin_v to_o be_v shame-free_a for_o abandon_v such_o vanity_n and_o to_o blush_v for_o not_o profess_v the_o truth_n and_o all_o on_o a_o sudden_a and_o unexpected_o say_v to_o simplicianus_n as_o he_o tell_v i_o let_v we_o go_v to_o church_n there_o i_o will_v be_v make_v a_o christian_n and_o so_o he_o transport_v with_o joy_n immediate_o accompany_v he_o thither_o where_o when_o he_o have_v be_v catechumenus_fw-la be_v admit_v a_o catechumenus_fw-la initiate_v in_o the_o first_o sacrament_n of_o instruction_n he_o not_o long_o after_o give_v in_o his_o name_n to_o receive_v regeneration_n by_o baptism_n rome_n wonder_v the_o church_n exult_v the_o proud_a see_v it_o and_o be_v grieve_v they_o gnash_v with_o their_o tooth_n and_o consume_v away_o 31.6_o psal_n 112_o 10._o psal_n 31.6_o as_o for_o thy_o servant_n o_o lord_n god_n be_v his_o hope_n and_o he_o no_o more_o regard_v lie_v vanity_n last_o when_o the_o time_n come_v of_o profess_v his_o faith_n which_o profession_n at_o rome_n by_o those_o who_o be_v about_o to_o receive_v thy_o grace_n in_o baptism_n be_v wont_a to_o be_v make_v in_o a_o set_a form_n of_o word_n learn_v by_o heart_n from_o a_o high_a place_n before_o all_o the_o faithful_a he_o say_v it_o be_v offer_v by_o the_o priest_n to_o victorinus_n that_o he_o shall_v perform_v it_o if_o he_o please_v in_o private_a as_o the_o custom_n be_v to_o indulge_v this_o to_o some_o who_o bashfulness_n in_o public_a be_v apt_a to_o be_v timorous_a but_o that_o he_o choose_v rather_o to_o profess_v the_o matter_n of_o his_o salvation_n in_o the_o presence_n of_o all_o the_o holy_a congregation_n for_o that_o there_o be_v no_o matter_n of_o salvation_n in_o the_o rhetoric_n he_o have_v teach_v and_o yet_o he_o have_v profess_v that_o public_o why_o therefore_o shall_v not_o he_o less_o fear_v thy_o meek_a and_o humble_a flock_n in_o pronounce_v thy_o word_n than_o he_o have_v fear_v former_o in_o deliver_v his_o own_o word_n a_o more_o rude_a and_o censorious_a multitude_n as_o soon_o then_o as_o he_o ascend_v public_o to_o repeat_v it_o every_o one_o as_o they_o know_v he_o whisper_v his_o name_n to_o other_o with_o much_o congratulation_n and_o who_o be_v there_o almost_o that_o know_v he_o not_o and_o every_o one_o joyful_a mouth_n in_o a_o low_a murmur_n sound_v victorinus_n victorinus_n such_o noise_n they_o sudden_o make_v in_o exultation_n to_o see_v he_o and_o as_o soon_o be_v they_o silent_a again_o out_o of_o attention_n to_o hear_v he_o and_o so_o he_o pronounce_v the_o orthodox_n faith_n with_o a_o wonderful_a confidence_n whilst_o every_o one_o strive_v with_o the_o arm_n of_o his_o love_n and_o joy_n to_o embrace_v and_o to_o seat_v he_o in_o the_o chief_a place_n of_o his_o heart_n and_o affection_n chap._n iii_o why_o more_o joy_n for_o man_n convert_v than_o have_v they_o be_v always_o professor_n 15.7_o professor_n a_o digression_n till_o the_o 5._o chapter_n luk._n 15.7_o good_a god_n how_o come_v it_o to_o pass_v in_o man_n that_o he_o rejoice_v much_o more_o in_o the_o safety_n of_o a_o soul_n despair_v of_o or_o deliver_v out_o of_o some_o extreme_a peril_n than_o where_o his_o hope_n of_o he_o be_v always_o great_a or_o the_o danger_n escape_v but_o little_o and_o so_o thou_o also_o father_n of_o mercy_n rejoic_a more_o over_o one_o penitent_a than_o over_o ninety_o nine_o just_a person_n who_o need_v no_o repentance_n and_o with_o much_o consolation_n we_o hear_v it_o when_o we_o hear_v in_o thy_o word_n how_o the_o overjoy_v shepherd_n bring_v home_o on_o his_o own_o shoulder_n the_o stray_a sheep_n and_o how_o the_o lose_a groat_n be_v bring_v back_o into_o thy_o treasure_n with_o the_o great_a joy_n *_o of_o the_o woman_n that_o find_v it_o and_o also_o *_o of_o her_o neighbour_n and_o the_o solemn_a gladness_n of_o thy_o whole_a house_n have_v force_v tear_n from_o we_o when_o in_o thy_o church_n it_o be_v read_v concern_v thy_o young_a son_n that_o he_o have_v be_v dead_a and_o be_v alive_a again_o have_v be_v lose_v and_o be_v find_v but_o this_o thy_o extraordinary_a rejoice_v be_v proper_o in_o we_o only_o and_o in_o thy_o angel_n satisfy_v with_o holy_a charity_n whilst_o thou_o be_v always_o the_o same_o who_o know_v all_o those_o thing_n always_o after_o the_o same_o manner_n which_o neither_o abide_v always_o nor_o on_o the_o same_o manner_n how_o then_o come_v it_o to_o pass_v in_o a_o soul_n that_o it_o be_v more_o delight_v in_o thing_n find_v again_o or_o restore_v than_o in_o those_o always_o possess_v for_o many_o other_o thing_n witness_v this_o and_o all_o place_n be_v full_a of_o testimony_n that_o so_o it_o be_v the_o conquer_a emperor_n solemnize_v a_o triumph_n but_o first_o undergo_v a_o battle_n and_o how_o much_o his_o peril_n be_v great_a in_o the_o fight_n so_o much_o be_v his_o joy_n in_o the_o triumph_n a_o tempest_n arise_v at_o sea_n and_o threaten_v shipwreck_n all_o grow_v pale_a with_o the_o fright_n of_o approaeh_a death_n the_o heaven_n and_o sea_n become_v serene_a and_o calm_a and_o their_o joy_n be_v now_o excessive_a because_o before_o their_o fear_n be_v so_o a_o dear_a friend_n fall_v sick_a and_o his_o
experience_n discover_v it_o vulgar_a â—ob_v 8.1_o vulgar_a and_o no_o man_n may_v be_v secure_a in_o this_o life_n which_o be_v whole_o call_v a_o temptation_n that_o as_o he_o may_v have_v be_v make_v of_o worse_a better_a so_o he_o may_v not_o become_v from_o better_a worse_a the_o only_a hope_n the_o only_a confidence_n the_o only_a secure_a promise_n to_o rely_v on_o be_v thy_o mercy_n o_o lord_n chap._n xxxiii_o 4._o his_o remain_a infirmity_n concern_v the_o temptation_n of_o the_o ear_n in_o music_n where_o whether_o music_n be_v useful_a in_o church_n the_o pleasure_n of_o the_o ear_n have_v more_o strong_o ensnare_v and_o captive_v i_o but_o thou_o have_v dissolve_v these_o bond_n and_o have_v set_v i_o at_o liberty_n i_o confess_v i_o do_v now_o still_o a_o little_a repose_n and_o acquiesse_n in_o the_o melody_n of_o those_o sound_n which_o be_v animate_v with_o thy_o sacred_a hymn_n when_o these_o be_v sing_v with_o a_o sweet_a &_o skilful_a voice_n yet_o not_o so_o adhere_v to_o they_o but_o that_o i_o can_v disengage_v myself_o at_o pleasure_n yet_o these_o air_n by_o reason_n of_o the_o divine_a matter_n which_o usher_v they_o in_o and_o procure_v their_o admittance_n do_v seek_v some_o respectful_a entertainment_n also_o in_o my_o soul_n and_o i_o find_v some_o difficulty_n to_o give_v they_o one_o exact_o suitable_a for_o i_o seem_v to_o myself_o sometime_o to_o allow_v they_o more_o honour_n than_o be_v meet_v upon_o experience_n *_o that_o our_o soul_n become_v more_o religious_o and_o fervent_o raise_v into_o a_o flame_n of_o devotion_n with_o those_o holy_a oracle_n when_o sing_v in_o such_o a_o manner_n than_o when_o not_o sing_v at_o all_o and_z *_o that_o all_o the_o affection_n of_o our_o spirit_n according_a to_o their_o manifold_a variety_n do_v find_v answerable_a note_n in_o music_n with_o a_o secret_a harmony_n and_o acquaintance_n of_o which_o they_o be_v much_o excite_v but_o yet_o the_o delight_n of_o my_o flesh_n to_o which_o we_o ought_v not_o to_o yield-ove_a the_o soul_n to_o be_v effeminate_a do_v often_o deceive_v i_o whilst_o my_o sense_n do_v not_o so_o wait_v upon_o reason_n as_o patient_o to_o follow_v it_o for_o who_o benefit_n only_o it_o be_v make_v use_n of_o but_o in_o seek_v its_o own_o contentment_n strive_v to_o run_v before_o and_o to_o lead_v it_z thus_o in_o these_o thing_n i_o offend_v yet_o do_v not_o then_o but_o afterward_o discover_v my_o fault_n and_o sometime_o again_o immoderate_o aware_a of_o this_o fallacy_n i_o err_v on_o the_o otherside_n in_o too_o much_o severity_n but_o this_o very_a seldom_o so_o that_o *_o i_o will_v have_v all_o the_o melody_n of_o those_o sweet_a tune_n in_o which_o david_n pralter_n be_v usual_o suâ—g_v banish_v from_o my_o ear_n and_o also_o from_o the_o church_n too_o and_z *_o that_n course_n seem_v to_o i_o the_o more_o safe_a which_o i_o have_v often_o hear_v tell_v of_o athanasius_n bishop_n of_o alexandria_n who_o cause_v the_o reader_n to_o speak_v the_o psalm_n with_o so_o small_a a_o variation_n of_o tone_n that_o it_o may_v seem_v near_o to_o pronounce_v than_o sing_v yet_o again_o when_o i_o call_v to_o mind_n those_o tear_n i_o shed_v in_o the_o sing_n of_o the_o church-hymne_n at_o the_o first_o beginning_n of_o my_o conversion_n to_o the_o faith_n and_o now_o also_o *_o my_o be_v much_o more_o move_v not_o with_o the_o sing_n but_o the_o thing_n sing_v when_o tune_v with_o a_o clear_a voice_n and_o a_o most_o convenient_a note_n i_o again_o acknowledge_v great_a benefit_n of_o such_o institution_n thus_o i_o float_v between_o the_o peril_n of_o be_v please_v and_o the_o experiment_n of_o be_v profit_v and_o be_o rather_o incline_v yet_o not_o with_o a_o irrevocable_a judgement_n to_o approve_v the_o custom_n of_o sing_v in_o the_o church_n that_o by_o the_o delight_n of_o the_o ear_n a_o weak_a soul_n may_v raise_v itself_o into_o a_o affection_n of_o piety_n yet_o whenever_o so_o it_o happen_v that_o the_o sing_v itself_o more_o move_v i_o than_o the_o matter_n sing_v i_o confess_v i_o sin_n penal_o and_o then_o have_v i_o rather_o hear_v no_o sing_n at_o all_o behold_v the_o present_a condition_n i_o be_o in_o weep_v you_o with_o i_o and_o for_o i_o weep_v you_o who_o within_o yourselves_o have_v the_o like_a good_a purpose_n with_o i_o from_o which_o purpose_v flow_v well-doing_n as_o for_o you_o who_o have_v none_o such_o thing_n as_o these_o trouble_v not_o you_o and_o thou_o o_o lord_n my_o god_n look_v back_o upon_o i_o and_o hear_v and_o see_v and_o pity_n and_o heal_v i_o in_o who_o sight_n i_o be_o thus_o become_v a_o question_n and_o a_o doubt_n unto_o myself_o &_o this_o be_v my_o present_a malady_n chap._n xxxiv_o 5._o his_o remain_a infirmity_n concern_v the_o temptation_n of_o the_o eye_n in_o splendid_a fair_a and_o well-proportioned_a object_n there_o remain_v yet_o the_o pleasure_n of_o these_o eye_n of_o my_o flesh_n of_o which_o i_o will_v now_o make_v my_o confession_n to_o be_v hear_v by_o the_o pious_a ear_n of_o my_o brethren_n thy_o temple_n that_o so_o we_o may_v conclude_v the_o temptation_n of_o the_o lust_n of_o the_o flesh_n which_o as_o yet_o assault_v i_o groan_v earnest_o and_o desire_v to_o be_v clothe_v upon_o with_o my_o house_n from_o heaven_n my_o eye_n yet_o love_v fair_a and_o vary_a figure_n bright_a and_o clear_a colour_n oh_o let_v not_o they_o possess_v my_o soul_n but_o let_v god_n possess_v it_o who_o make_v they_o very_o good_a indeed_o but_o yet_o be_v he_o my_o good_a and_o not_o they_o 1.31_o gen._n 1.31_o and_o these_o thing_n accost_v i_o when_o awake_a all_o the_o day_n long_o neither_o do_v i_o find_v any_o respite_n from_o they_o as_o i_o do_v from_o musical_a and_o sometime_o from_o all_o other_o sounds_z as_o it_o happen_v in_o a_o perfect_a silence_n for_o the_o very_a light_n itself_o the_o queen_n of_o colour_n in_o its_o overspread_v all_o thing_n which_o we_o behold_v pleasant_o with_o a_o various_a influx_n flatter_v and_o inveigle_v i_o even_o when_o do_v something_o else_o and_o not_o observe_v it_o and_o so_o strong_o do_v it_o insinuate_v itself_o that_o if_o sudden_o withdraw_v it_o be_v straight_o impatient_o desire_v and_o if_o long_o miss_v it_o contristate_v my_o spirit_n but_o o_o that_o light_n *_o which_o toby_n behold_v when_o with_o his_o eye_n close_v 4._o tob._n 4._o he_o direct_v his_o son_n the_o way_n to_o life_n and_o himself_o walk_v before_o he_o with_o the_o foot_n of_o charity_n which_o swerve_v not_o at_o all_o from_o the_o right_a way_n or_o *_o which_o isaac_n behold_v 27._o gen._n 27._o when_o his_o carnal_a sight_n be_v close_v with_o old_a age_n he_o bless_v not_o his_o son_n by_o know_v they_o but_z by_o blessing_n come_v to_o know_v they_o 49._o gen._n 49._o or_o *_o which_o jacob_n behold_v â–³_o when_o he_o also_o by_o great_a age_n have_v lose_v his_o sight_n with_o a_o illuminate_v soul_n view_v and_o foresignify_v the_o condition_n of_o the_o several_a people_n descend_v from_o his_o son_n and_o â–³_o when_o he_o impose_v his_o hand_n 48._o gen._n 48._o mystical_o cross_v upon_o joseph_n child_n not_o as_o their_o father_n outward_o direct_v but_o as_o he_o inward_o discern_v that_o be_v the_o true_a light_n and_o one_o it_o be_v and_o unchangeable_a it_o be_v and_o one_o also_o be_v all_o they_o who_o see_v and_o who_o love_n it_z but_o that_o other_o corporeal_a light_n of_o which_o i_o have_v be_v speak_v season_v and_o relish_v this_o present_a life_n to_o its_o blind_a lover_n with_o a_o most_o ensnare_a and_o perilous_a sweetness_n but_o those_o who_o know_v also_o how_o from_o it_o to_o give_v thou_o glory_n o_o god_n all-creator_n spend_v it_o in_o thy_o hymn_n and_o prevent_v it_o in_o their_o vigilance_n and_o such_o i_o desire_v to_o be_v these_o seducement_n of_o my_o eye_n i_o now_o fight_v against_o lest_o my_o foot_n wherewith_o i_o walk_v in_o thy_o way_n shall_v happen_v any_o way_n to_o be_v ensnare_v and_o to_o thou_o i_o lift_v up_o my_o invisible_a eye_n that_o thou_o will_v pull_v my_o foot_n out_o of_o the_o snare_n and_o thou_o be_v ever_o and_o anon_o lose_v they_o for_o often_o be_v they_o fetter_v these_o net_n be_v spread_v for_o i_o on_o every_o side_n but_o thou_o delay_v not_o to_o pluck_v they_o out_o again_o who_o be_v the_o keeper_n of_o israel_n that_o never_o slumber_v nor_o sleep_v for_o what_o innumerable_a invention_n by_o divers_a art_n and_o manufacture_n in_o attire_n utensile_n furniture_n building_n and_o in_o picture_n also_o and_o several_a sort_n of_o statue_n and_o image_n those_o surpass_v all_o necessary_a or_o moderate_a use_n these_o any_o pious_a significatson_n have_v man_n accumulate_v to_o the_o former_a
answer_v to_o the_o objection_n of_o catholic_n make_v out_o of_o the_o scripture_n cap._n 11_o have_v set_v up_o a_o rhetoric_n school_n at_o rome_n his_o scholar_n there_o defraud_v he_o of_o their_o stipend_n cap._n 12_o recommend_v by_o symmachus_n he_o remove_v from_o rome_n to_o teach_v rhetoric_n at_o milan_n where_o he_o be_v favourable_o receive_v by_o s._n ambrose_n their_o bishop_n who_o sermon_n he_o frequent_v only_o for_o the_o fame_n of_o his_o eloquence_n cap._n 13_o and_o be_v by_o little_a and_o little_o take_v with_o his_o doctrine_n whereupon_o he_o resolve_v abandon_v the_o manichean_a sect_n to_o remain_v a_o catechumenus_fw-la in_o the_o church_n catholic_n till_o some_o further_a discovery_n of_o truth_n cap._n 14_o lib_fw-la vi_o his_o mother_n monica_n pass_v many_o danger_n at_o sea_n come_v to_o he_o to_o milan_n her_o vision_n at_o sea_n cap._n 1_o her_o great_a piety_n sobriety_n obedience_n to_o bishop_n ambrose_n prohibit_v feast_n at_o the_o tomb_n of_o martyr_n then_o anâ—_n usual_a custom_n in_o africa_n cap._n 2_o s._n ambrose_n his_o employment_n s._n austin_n find_v no_o opportunity_n of_o private_a discourse_n with_o he_o yet_o learn_v from_o his_o sermon_n that_o catholic_n hold_v not_o the_o doctrine_n charge_v on_o they_o by_o the_o manichee_n cap._n 3_o confute_v he_o blame_v his_o former_a too_o much_o caution_n and_o jealousy_n *_o in_o assent_v to_o the_o catholic_n tenant_n cap._n 4_o and*_n in_o acknowledge_v the_o divine_a authority_n of_o the_o scripture_n as_o they_o be_v deliver_v by_o the_o church_n cap._n 5_o his_o ambition_n and_o the_o care_n attend_v it_o his_o great_a solicitude_n be_v to_o speak_v a_o panegyric_n before_o the_o emperor_n much_o envy_v the_o secure_a mirth_n of_o a_o poor_a beggar_n see_v in_o the_o street_n cap._n 6_o of_o his_o friend_n alipius_n his_o scholar_n at_o carthage_n who_o he_o there_o reclaim_v from_o the_o vainsport_v of_o the_o circus_n but_o infect_v he_o with_o manicheism_n cap._n 7_o alipius_n before_o s._n augustine_n come_n thither_o a_o student_n of_o the_o law_n at_o rome_n how_o seduce_v there_o though_o very_o averse_a to_o behold_v and_o then_o to_o delight_v in_o the_o bloody_a show_n of_o the_o gladiator_n cap._n 8_o of_o his_o be_v apprehend_v when_o s._n augustine_n scholar_n at_o carthage_n for_o a_o thief_n his_o go_v to_o s._n austin_n to_o milan_n where_o he_o practise_v in_o the_o law_n cap._n 9_o a_o memorable_a example_n of_o alipius_n his_o integrity_n concern_v his_o other_o friend_n nebridius_fw-la desert_v his_o country_n for_o s._n augustine_n society_n and_o the_o study_n of_o wisdom_n cap._n 10_o s._n augustine_n reason_v with_o himself_o concern_v he_o past_a and_o present_a condition_n and_o the_o disposal_n of_o his_o future_a life_n the_o misery_n he_o apprehend_v to_o be_v in_o a_o single_a life_n cap._n 11_o the_o dispute_v between_o he_o and_o alipius_n most_o chaste_o dispose_v concern_v marriage_n and_o single_a life_n cap._n 12_o s._n austin_n suitor_n to_o a_o young_a maid_n with_o who_o marriage_n be_v intend_v but_o she_o as_o yet_o two_o year_n too_o young_a his_o mother_n seek_v but_o can_v obtain_v any_o revelation_n from_o god_n concern_v this_o marriage_n cap._n 13_o their_o live_v a_o many_o together_o and_o have_v all_o thing_n common_a in_o a_o marry_a condition_n design_v but_o soon_o lay_v aside_o cap._n 14_o his_o former_a concubine_n of_o who_o see_v 4_o l._n 2._o c._n be_v remove_v as_o a_o impediment_n to_o his_o marriage_n and_o leave_v with_o he_o the_o son_n he_o have_v by_o she_o return_v into_o africa_n vow_n continency_n instead_o of_o who_o he_o private_o take_v another_o cap._n 15_o yet_o his_o lust_n somewhat_o restrain_v from_o the_o fear_n he_o have_v *_o of_o death_n and*_n of_o the_o soul_n immortality_n and*_n of_o future_a judgement_n cap._n 16_o lib_fw-la vii_o his_o entrance_n now_o be_v thirty_o year_n old_a into_o man_n estate_n his_o apprehension_n of_o god_n as_o inviolable_a incorruptible_a immutable_a every_o way_n infinite_a but_o yet_o corporeal_a cap._n 1_o still_o unsatisfied_a concern_v the_o cause_n of_o evil_a and_o why_o angel_n and_o man_n be_v create_v by_o the_o most_o good_a god_n there_o shall_v by_o he_o be_v place_v in_o they_o a_o power_n to_o will_v evil_o cap._n 2_o 3_o pursue_v the_o same_o querie_n still_o unde_fw-la malum_fw-la yet_o *_o his_o faith_n of_o christ_n to_o be_v our_o lord_n and_o saviour_n remain_v in_o he_o firm_a and_o unshaken_a cap._n 4_o 5_o and*_n the_o lie_a divination_n of_o astrologer_n foretell_v from_o the_o star_n future_a event_n no_o way_n credit_v by_o he_o cap._n 6_o prosecute_a the_o same_o querie_n unde_fw-la malum_fw-la cap._n 7_o upon_o recommendation_n he_o fall_v to_o read_v the_o book_n of_o the_o platonist_n and_o discover_v in_o they_o much_o concern_v the_o divinity_n of_o the_o eternal_a word_n but_o nothing_o of_o the_o humility_n of_o his_o incarnation_n cap._n 9_o he_o now_o more_o clear_o discover_v divine_a matter_n that_o something_o may_v have_v a_o be_v and_o this_o not_o corporeal_a or_o extend_v in_o place_n cap._n 10_o that_o the_o creature_n may_v be_v say_v in_o some_o sense_n to_o have_v in_o another_o not_o to_o have_v a_o be_v cap._n 11_o that_o all_o nature_n even_o the_o corruptible_a be_v good_a though_o not_o the_o supreme_a good_n cap._n 12_o that_o there_o can_v be_v nothing_o in_o the_o world_n simple_o but_o only_o relative_o evil_a cap._n 13_o that_o sin_n be_v no_o substance_n but_o the_o perversity_n of_o a_o irregular_a will_n decline_v from_o its_o maker_n cap._n 16_o that_o he_o begin_v now_o to_o have_v a_o right_a opinion_n of_o god_n cap._n 17_o but_o have_v not_o yet_o a_o right_a opinion_n of_o the_o incarnation_n of_o the_o lord_n jesus_n the_o only_a way_n to_o salvation_n cap._n 18_o though_o from_o the_o platonic_a writing_n he_o become_v assure_v of_o many_o divine_a truth_n yet_o these_o book_n breed_v pride_n in_o he_o and_o not_o humility_n cap._n 20_o he_n last_o betake_v himself_o to_o read_v of_o the_o scripture_n especial_o those_o of_o s._n paul_n where_o he_o find_v the_o advancement_n of_o god_n grace_n and_o salvation_n through_o jesus_n christ_n to_o the_o penitent_a and_o humble_a cap._n 21_o lib_fw-la viii_o he_o go_v to_o consult_v simplicianus_n a_o holy_a man_n and_o the_o spiritual_a father_n of_o s._n ambrose_n about_o the_o future_a order_n of_o his_o life_n remain_v still_o passionate_o bend_v on_o marriage_n cap._n 1_o upon_o mention_n of_o victorinus_n a_o famous_a roman_a rhetorician_n simplicianus_n relate_v the_o story_n of_o victorinus_n his_o conversion_n to_o christianity_n cap._n 2_o why_o more_o joy_n for_o man_n convert_v than_o have_v they_o be_v always_o professor_n cap._n 3_o why_o more_o joy_n in_o the_o conversion_n of_o man_n eminent_a or_o noble_a cap._n 4_o what_o operation_n the_o story_n of_o victorinus_n have_v upon_o he_o and_o his_o great_a captivity_n under_o former_a ill_a custom_n cap._n 5_o after_o this_o pontitianus_n a_o african_a and_o a_o officer_n in_o the_o court_n giving_z him_z and_z alipius_n a_o visit_n occasional_o relate_v the_o story_n of_o s._n anthony_n and_o how_o two_o of_o his_o fellow-courtier_n upon_o the_o read_n thereof_o in_o the_o same_o moment_n renounce_v the_o world_n though_o both_o engage_v to_o mistress_n and_o betake_v themselves_o to_o a_o solitary_a life_n cap._n 6_o the_o tumult_n of_o his_o spirit_n upon_o pontitian_n discourse_n cap._n 7_o in_o this_o anguish_n of_o soul_n his_o retire_n into_o a_o garden_n alipius_n follow_v he_o cap._n 8_o the_o fierce_a combat_n there_o between_o the_o flesh_n and_o the_o spirit_n and_o his_o sad_a complaint_n of_o the_o gaeot_n difficulty_n the_o will_n have_v to_o command_v itself_o when_o it_o so_o easy_o command_v the_o other_o member_n cap._n 9_o 10_o 11_o his_o total_a conversion_n by_o read_v upon_o the_o hear_n a_o voice_n from_o heaven_n a_o passage_n of_o s._n paul_n where_o the_o book_n first_o open_v cap._n 12_o lib_fw-la ix_o doxology_n and_o thanksgiving_n for_o this_o his_o freedom_n from_o his_o former_a lust_n and_o the_o great_a joy_n and_o content_n he_o present_o receive_v therein_o cap._n 1_o his_o purpose_n to_o relinquish_v his_o profession_n of_o teach_v rhetoric_n but_o the_o thing_n defer_v till_o the_o vintage-vacation_n cap._n 2_o verecundus_n a_o citizen_n of_o milan_n offer_v his_o countryhouse_n for_o iheir_a retirement_n the_o death_n of_o verecundus_n and_o of_o nebridius_fw-la not_o long_o after_o s._n augustine_n conversion_n be_v both_o first_o make_v christian_n cap._n 3_o his_o retire_n in_o the_o vacation_n after_o his_o school_n dissolve_v to_o the_o country_n house_n of_o verecundus_n his_o meditation_n on_o the_o four_o psalm_n and_o his_o several_a writing_n there_o and_o the_o miraculous_a cure_n of_o his_o violent_a
depart_v full_a of_o anger_n and_o disdain_n but_o if_o it_o be_v otherwise_o stay_v attentive_a and_o shed_v joyful_a tear_n love_n we_o sorrow_n then_o and_o tear_n sure_o every_o one_o desire_n joy_v rather_o or_o be_v it_o that_o when_o as_o we_o desire_v that_o none_o shall_v be_v miserable_a yet_o we_o be_v please_v that_o ourselves_o shall_v be_v pitiful_a and_o this_o pity_v not_o be_v at_o all_o without_o some_o grief_n therefore_o become_v grief_n itself_o also_o affect_v and_o all_o this_o proceed_v from_o a_o certain_a vein_n and_o source_n of_o friendship_n in_o we_o but_o whither_o go_v that_o source_n whither_o run_v it_o wherefore_o fall_v it_o at_o length_n into_o that_o torrent_n of_o boil_a pitch_n those_o vast_a whirlpool_n of_o stink_a lust_n into_o which_o it_o become_v wilful_o change_v and_o transform_v be_v precipitate_v and_o degrade_v from_o its_o own_o celestial_a purity_n must_v all_o affection_n and_o pity_v then_o be_v abandon_v by_o no_o mean_n and_o hence_o sometime_o grief_n also_o may_v be_v love_v but_o beware_v of_o any_o uncleaness_n in_o these_o o_o my_o soul_n under_o the_o tuition_n of_o my_o god_n the_o god_n of_o our_o father_n and_o through_o all_o age_n to_o be_v praise_v and_o superexalt_v beware_v of_o any_o uncleanness_n in_o they_o for_o now_o also_o be_o i_o not_o void_a of_o compassion_n and_o pity_n but_o whereas_o then_o in_o those_o theater_n i_o co-rejoyced_n with_o lover_n when_o enjoy_v their_o unchaste_a desire_n though_o these_o imaginary_a only_a in_o the_o play_n and_o out_o of_o pity_n to_o they_o grow_v as_o sad_a when_o they_o lose_v one_o another_o and_o yet_o both_o these_o passion_n afford_v i_o delight_n i_o now_o contrary_a more_o pity_n one_o when_o triumph_v in_o his_o obtain_a wickedness_n than_o when_o despair_v in_o the_o miss_n of_o that_o pernicious_a pleasure_n and_o in_o the_o loss_n of_o that_o miserable_a felicity_n this_o certain_o be_v the_o true_a compassion_n but_o in_o it_o the_o heart_n be_v not_o joy_v for_o though_o he_o be_v commend_v for_o do_v a_o office_n of_o charity_n that_o condole_v another_o misery_n yet_o have_v he_o always_o rather_o that_o thing_n have_v not_o be_v which_o he_o condole_v whosoever_o be_v true_o compassionate_a for_o if_o goodwill_n can_v be_v thus_o ill-wishing_a which_o can_v be_v than_o he_o that_o true_o and_o sincere_o pity_v may_v desire_v another_o shall_v be_v miserable_a to_o the_o end_n that_o himself_o so_o may_v be_v merciful_a some_o grief_n than_o be_v to_o be_v approve_v none_o to_o be_v love_v yet_o be_v it_o sometime_o too_o approve_v for_o this_o belong_v to_o thou_o only_o lord_n god_n that_o whilst_o thou_o love_v soul_n far_o more_o pure_o than_o we_o and_o more_o incorruptible_o have_v pity_v towards_o they_o yet_o no_o manner_n of_o sorrow_n for_o they_o can_v wound_v thou_o and_o who_o be_v sufficient_a for_o such_o thing_n beside_o thou_o but_o i_o then_o poor_a wretch_n love_v to_o grieve_v and_o search_v what_o may_v cause_v it_o when_o in_o another_o man_n and_o this_o only_a a_o personate_a disaster_n that_o action_n of_o the_o player_n delight_v more_o and_o strongly_a bewitch_v i_o that_o draw_v tear_n from_o i_o and_o what_o marvel_n be_v it_o that_o i_o a_o unfortunate_a sheep_n stray_v from_o thy_o flock_n and_o impatient_a of_o thy_o discipline_n shall_v be_v overspread_v with_o such_o a_o nasty_a scab_n and_o hence_o be_v that_o affection_n to_o sorrow_n not_o such_o as_o pierce_v i_o inward_o for_o neither_o do_v i_o love_v to_o suffer_v what_o i_o love_v to_o see_v but_o such_o as_o be_v relate_v only_o and_o feign_v but_o raze_v as_o it_o be_v the_o skin_n of_o my_o soul_n yet_o like_o the_o scratch_n of_o a_o envenom_a nail_n a_o inflame_a tumour_n and_o impostumation_n and_o putrefaction_n follow_v upon_o it_o such_o be_v the_o life_n i_o lead_v but_o indeed_o be_v that_o then_o to_o be_v call_v a_o life_n o_o my_o god_n chap._n iii_o his_o concupiscence_n in_o the_o church_n the_o ambition_n of_o his_o study_n and_o conversation_n among_o the_o jeer_a and_o abusive_a wit_n and_o then_o thy_o mercy_n ever_o faithful_a to_o i_o hover_v still_o afar_o off_o over_o i_o whilst_o i_o be_v dissolve_v into_o all_o impiety_n pursue_v a_o sacrilegious_a curiosity_n which_o bring_v i_o have_v forsake_v thou_o to_o low_a and_o treacherous_a vanity_n and_o to_o the_o circumvent_a service_n of_o malign_v devil_n to_o who_o i_o sacrifice_v my_o villainy_n though_o in_o they_o all_o i_o be_v still_o scourge_v by_o thou_o then_o i_o dare_v even_o in_o the_o celebration_n of_o thy_o solemn_a feast_n within_o the_o wall_n of_o thy_o sanctuary_n to_o exercise_v my_o concupiscence_n and_o to_o drive_v the_o trade_n of_o procure_v the_o fruit_n of_o death_n for_o which_o thou_o scourgedst_a i_o with_o grievous_a pain_n but_o nothing_o comparable_a to_o my_o crime_n o_o thou_o my_o exceed_a great_a mercy_n my_o god_n thou_o who_o be_v also_o my_o refuge_n from_o those_o terrible_a mischievous_a eversores_fw-la mischievous_a the_o eversores_fw-la person_n among_o who_o i_o gad_v here_o and_o there_o with_o a_o outstretch_a neck_n a_o runaway_n from_o thou_o love_v my_o own_o way_n and_o not_o thou_o and_o love_v that_o my_o fugitive_a liberty_n those_o study_n which_o be_v count_v of_o great_a repute_n have_v a_o strong_a influence_n upon_o i_o as_o fit_v we_o for_o plead_v in_o the_o public_a court_n of_o justice_n and_o i_o have_v a_o ambition_n to_o be_v excellent_a in_o they_o thus_o to_o become_v so_o much_o the_o famouser_n how_o much_o by_o my_o eloquence_n more_o deceive_v so_o great_a be_v the_o blindness_n of_o man_n glory_v also_o in_o their_o blindness_n and_o by_o this_o time_n i_o be_v grow_v a_o head-scholler_n in_o the_o rhetorick-school_n please_v with_o self-conceit_n and_o swell_v with_o pride_n though_o much_o more_o modest_a o_o lord_n thou_o know_v than_o some_o other_o be_v and_o far_o remove_v from_o those_o eversion_n the_o 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these_o also_o subject_n to_o mutability_n from_o he_o only_o have_v their_o stability_n else_o perirent_fw-la else_o alioquin_fw-la irent_fw-la &_o perirent_fw-la pass-on_a they_o will_v and_o at_o last_o pass-away_a in_o he_o therefore_o let_v these_o also_o be_v love_v and_o entice_v with_o thou_o to_o he_o as_o many_o of_o they_o as_o thou_o can_v and_o say_v unto_o they_o he_o let_v we_o love_v he_o let_v we_o love_v he_o make_v these_o thing_n and_o he_o be_v not_o far_o off_o for_o he_o make_v they_o not_o and_o so_o leave_v they_o but_o be_v of_o he_o they_o be_v in_o he_o too_o lo_o where_o he_o be_v where_o truth_n be_v rellish_v well_o he_o be_v in_o the_o heart_n but_o alas_o that_o heart_n have_v stray_v from_o he_o vulg._n isa_n 46.8_o vulg._n return_v o_o prevaricator_n unto_o your_o heart_n again_o and_o be_v unite_v unto_o he_o that_o make_v you_o stand_v with_o he_o and_o you_o shall_v stand_v fast_o rest_n in_o he_o and_o you_o shall_v be_v at_o rest_n whither_o go_v you_o into_o precipice_n whither_o go_v you_o the_o good_a you_o court_v and_o woo_v be_v from_o he_o and_o so_o much_o as_o it_o be_v it_o be_v in_o your_o tend_v towards_o he_o good_a and_o delicious_a to_o you_o but_o just_o then_o embitter_v to_o we_o when_o it_o be_v once_o unjust_o love_v with_o the_o desertion_n of_o he_o from_o who_o it_o be_v to_o what_o purpose_n still_o and_o still_o tread_v you_o those_o difficult_a and_o toilsome_a path_n rest_n be_v not_o there_o where_o you_o seek_v it_o seek_v free_o what_o you_o do_v seek_v but_o there_o it_o be_v not_o where_o you_o be_v seek_v it_o a_o bless_a life_n you_o seek_v in_o the_o region_n of_o death_n and_o it_o be_v not_o there_o how_o life_n happy_a there_o where_o neither_o life_n but_o life_n itself_o descend_v hither_o and_o undergo_v our_o death_n and_o out_o of_o the_o super-abundance_n of_o its_o life_n slay_v it_o and_o then_o with_o a_o voice_n of_o thunder_n call_v out_o unto_o we_o that_o we_o shall_v hence_o 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that_o i_o entertain_v of_o thing_n spiritual_a permit_v i_o not_o to_o discern_v truth_n and_o there_o be_v still_o flash_v in_o my_o eye_n the_o very_a power_n of_o truth_n and_o yet_o i_o avert_v my_o timorous_a mind_n from_o the_o cogitation_n of_o any_o thing_n incorporeal_a to_o lineament_n and_o colour_n and_o swell_a magnitude_n and_o when_o i_o can_v not_o see_v these_o in_o my_o mind_n i_o think_v that_o neither_o can_v i_o see_v or_o discern_v my_o mind_n and_o whereas_o i_o love_v the_o harmony_n that_o be_v in_o virtue_n and_o loathe_v the_o discord_n of_o vice_n i_o note_v a_o unity_n in_o the_o one_o and_o in_o the_o other_o a_o kind_n of_o division_n and_o i_o conceive_v the_o rational_a soul_n and_o the_o nature_n of_o truth_n and_o of_o the_o summum_fw-la bonum_fw-la the_o chief_a good_a to_o consist_v in_o this_o unity_n but_o in_o that_o division_n i_o silly_o suppose_v that_o there_o be_v i_o know_v not_o what_o substance_n of_o a_o irrational_a vitality_n and_o 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vicious_a and_o behave_v itself_o insolent_o and_o unruly_a and_o again_o flagitious_a if_o that_o affection_n of_o the_o soul_n wherewith_o carnal_a pleasure_n be_v entertain_v become_v intemperate_a so_o error_n and_o false_a opinion_n be_v likewise_o a_o contamination_n of_o our_o life_n if_o so_o be_v the_o rational_a soul_n itself_o be_v any_o way_n vitiate_v as_o it_o be_v then_o in_o i_o not_o know_v that_o it_o be_v to_o be_v illuminate_v with_o another_o ray_n than_o its_o own_o to_o partake_v of_o truth_n for_o that_o itself_o be_v not_o the_o very_a nature_n of_o truth_n because_o it_o be_v thou_o that_o shall_v light_v this_o my_o candle_n o_o lord_n my_o god_n thou_o shall_v enlighten_v my_o darkness_n and_o of_o thy_o fullness_n have_v we_o all_o receive_v for_o thou_o be_v the_o true_a light_n that_o enlighten_v every_o man_n that_o come_v into_o the_o world_n for_o that_o in_o thou_o there_o be_v no_o variableness_n nor_o return_v shadow_n but_o i_o aspire_v towards_o thou_o and_o be_v repel_v from_o thou_o and_o confine_v unto_o the_o shadow_n of_o death_n because_o the_o proud_a be_v always_o resist_v by_o thou_o and_o what_o thing_n proud_a than_o i_o who_o by_o a_o strange_a madness_n maintain_v that_o myself_o be_v natural_o what_o thou_o be_v for_o when_o i_o be_v a_o thing_n mutable_a which_o be_v from_o this_o apparent_a to_o i_o that_o i_o in_o covet_v wisdom_n seek_v from_o something_o worse_a to_o become_v something_o better_o yet_o i_o have_v rather_o conjecture_v thou_o mutable_a also_o than_o myself_o not_o to_o be_v the_o same_o which_o thou_o be_v therefore_o be_v i_o repel_v by_o thou_o and_o thou_o do_v resist_v my_o stiff-swoln_a neck_n and_o i_o somniate_v corporeal_a form_n and_o be_v flesh_n i_o notwithstanding_o accuse_v the_o flesh_n 78.39_o psal_n 78.39_o &_o be_v a_o wind_n that_o pase_v i_o return_v not_o unto_o thou_o but_o pass_v i_o pass_v unto_o those_o thing_n which_o have_v no_o be_v nether_a in_o thou_o nor_o in_o i_o nor_o in_o any_o body_n else_o neither_o be_v they_o create_v for_o i_o by_o thy_o truth_n but_o by_o my_o vanity_n devise_v out_o of_o a_o body_n and_o i_o say_v to_o the_o little_a one_o thy_o faithful_a my_o now_o fellow-citizen_n from_o who_o then_o i_o live_v a_o exile_n i_o say_v to_o they_o as_o arrogant_a as_o silly_a why_o therefore_o erâ—s_v that_o soul_n which_o god_n have_v make_v yet_o can_v i_o not_o endure_v it_o shall_v be_v say_v to_o i_o again_o why_o then_o err_v the_o soul_n be_v god_n and_o i_o rather_o contend_v that_o thy_o immutable_a substance_n be_v necessitate_v to_o err_v than_o confess_v that_o i_o so_o mutable_a be_v spontaneous_o either_o err_a or_o in_o danger_n of_o error_n and_o i_o be_v of_o the_o age_n of_o six_o or_o seven_o and_o twenty_o when_o i_o pen_v those_o volume_n revolve_v within_o myself_o those_o corporeal_a fancy_n that_o continual_o buzz_v about_o the_o ear_n of_o my_o heart_n which_o ear_n of_o i_o be_v intent_n o_o thou_o sweet_a verity_n unto_o that_o interior_a melody_n of_o thou_o all_o the_o while_o i_o meditate_a on_o this_o fair_a and_o decorous_a subject_n long_v indeed_o to_o stand_v quiâ—t_v and_o hear_v thou_o and_o with_o joy_n to_o rejoice_v at_o the_o voice_n of_o the_o bridegroom_n 3.29_o jo._n 3.29_o and_o i_o can_v not_o because_o by_o the_o call_n of_o my_o error_n i_o be_v with-drawn_a from_o thou_o and_o with_o the_o weight_n of_o my_o pride_n sink_v down_o into_o the_o dungeon_n 51.8_o psal_n 51.8_o nor_o do_v thou_o then_o give_v to_o this_o my_o harken_v joy_n and_o gladness_n nor_o do_v the_o bone_n exult_v which_o have_v not_o yet_o be_v humble_v chap._n xvi_o of_o his_o strange_a acuteness_n of_o wit_n acquire_v all_o the_o liberal_a science_n without_o a_o teacher_n and_o yet_o so_o gross_o err_v in_o religion_n and_o â–³_o what_o do_v it_o profit_v i_o that_o be_v scarce_o twenty_o year_n old_a i_o read_v and_o understand_v alone_o a_o work_n of_o aristotle_n that_o fall_v into_o my_o hand_n call_v the_o ten_o category_n which_o my_o master_n a_o rhetorician_n of_o carthage_n and_o other_o account_v learn_v have_v commented_a on_o to_o other_o scholar_n with_o check_n even_o burst_v with_o pride_n and_o i_o also_o have_v with_o much_o admiration_n long_v after_o as_o i_o know_v not_o what_o profound_a and_o divine_a piece_n and_o i_o afterward_o confer_v with_o other_o who_o profess_v that_o they_o have_v much_o ado_n to_o comprehend_v these_o thing_n though_o instruct_v by_o most_o learned_a tutor_n not_o only_o expound_v but_o in_o sand-table_n demonstrate_v they_o they_o can_v add_v nothing_o to_o my_o former_a self-acquired_n knowledge_n â–³_o what_o do_v this_o profit_n i_o nay_o do_v it_o not_o harm_v i_o when_o likewise_o thou_o o_o my_o god_n so_o wonderful_a simple_a and_o un-accidental_a whilst_o i_o think_v whatever_o be_v be_v comprehend_v in_o these_o ten_o predicament_n thou_o also_o be_v so_o conceive_v by_o i_o as_o if_o thou_o also_o be_v the_o subject_n to_o thy_o greatness_n or_o to_o thy_o beauty_n and_o that_o they_o inhere_v in_o thou_o as_o they_o do_v in_o body_n when_o as_o thy_o greatness_n and_o thy_o beauty_n be_v thyself_o but_o body_n be_v not_o by_o that_o great_a or_o fair_a by_o which_o it_o be_v a_o body_n for_o be_v it_o less_o great_a or_o less_o fair_a nevertheless_o a_o body_n it_o be_v for_o a_o falsity_n it_o be_v which_o i_o imagine_v of_o thou_o and_o not_o truth_n and_o those_o be_v figment_n of_o my_o wretchedness_n not_o the_o firmament_n and_o stability_n of_o thy_o blessedness_n for_o thou_o command_v and_o so_o it_o come_v to_o pass_v unto_o i_o 3.18_o gen._n 3.18_o that_o this_o my_o earth_n shall_v bring_v forth_o thorn_n and_o brier_n unto_o i_o and_o with_o labour_n i_o shall_v earn_v my_o bread_n and_o again_o â–³_o what_o profit_v it_o i_o that_o all_o the_o book_n i_o can_v procure_v of_o the_o art_n call_v liberal_a my_o self_n meanwhile_n be_v a_o slave_n to_o lust_n be_v read_v over_o by_o i_o and_o by_o myself_o alone_o thorough_o understand_v and_o i_o take_v great_a delight_n in_o they_o for_o the_o truth_n and_o certainty_n i_o find_v there_o yet_o know_v not_o whence_o it_o be_v for_o i_o have_v my_o back_n upon_o the_o light_n and_o my_o face_n upon_o the_o thing_n enlighten_v whence_o my_o face_n that_o behold_v the_o thing_n illustrate_v itself_o be_v not_o illuminate_v at_o all_o and_o whatsoever_o be_v say_v in_o they_o concern_v the_o art_n of_o speak_v or_o of_o reason_v whatsoever_o of_o the_o measure_n of_o figure_n of_o note_n musical_a or_o of_o number_n without_o much_o difficulty_n i_o understand_v and_o without_o any_o teacher_n as_o thou_o know_v o_o lord_n my_o god_n for_o both_o
quickness_n of_o apprehension_n and_o subtlety_n of_o reason_v be_v thy_o gift_n though_o i_o do_v not_o sacrifice_v my_o due_a acknowledgement_n thereof_o unto_o thou_o therefore_o serve_v it_o not_o for_o my_o use_n but_o my_o perdition_n rather_o 15.12_o luke_n 15.12_o because_o i_o desire_v to_o have_v that_o so_o liberal_a a_o part_n of_o my_o portion_n in_o my_o own_o hand_n and_o do_v not_o preserve_v my_o strength_n for_o thy_o service_n but_o go_v far_o from_o thou_o into_o a_o remote_a country_n that_o i_o may_v waste_v it_o upon_o meretricious_a delight_n for_o â–³_o what_o profit_v it_o i_o so_o good_a a_o thing_n not_o right_o employ_v for_o i_o perceive_v not_o that_o thâ—â—â—_n art_n â—ven_v by_o the_o studious_a and_o ingenious_a be_v so_o difficult_o understand_v till_o afterward_o i_o go_v about_o to_o teach_v these_o unto_o they_o when_o he_o be_v account_v most_o excellent_a among_o they_o that_o be_v lesse-slow_o capable_a of_o those_o my_o exposition_n but_o yet_o â–³_o what_o do_v this_o profit_n i_o meanwhile_o imagine_v that_o thou_o o_o lord_n my_o god_n who_o be_v the_o truth_n be_v only_o a_o lucid_n and_o immense_a body_n and_o that_o myself_o be_v a_o piece_n of_o that_o lump_n perverseness_n too_o great_a but_o so_o it_o be_v with_o i_o nor_o will_v i_o now_o blush_v to_o confess_v unto_o thou_o my_o god_n thy_o mercy_n towards_o i_o and_o to_o call_v upon_o thou_o who_o then_o blush_v not_o to_o profess_v to_o man_n my_o blasphemy_n and_o to_o bark_v against_o thou_o â–³_o what_o then_o profit_v i_o *_o that_o my_o wit_n in_o all_o those_o science_n so_o nimble_a and_o *_o so_o many_o knotty_a book_n without_o any_o humane_a assistance_n so_o easy_o unfold_v by_o i_o when_o i_o so_o foul_o and_o sacrilegious_o err_v in_o the_o doctrine_n of_o piety_n or_o what_o hindrance_n be_v a_o far_o slow_a capacity_n to_o those_o thy_o little_a one_o that_o never_o stray_v far_o from_o thou_o but_o within_o the_o nest_n of_o thy_o church_n secure_o feather_v themselves_o and_o have_v the_o wing_n of_o their_o charity_n nourish_v with_o a_o orthodox_n faith_n o_o lord_n our_o god_n let_v we_o ever_o trust_v in_o the_o overspread_n of_o thy_o wing_n cover_v thou_o we_o with_o they_o and_o bear_v thou_o we_o upon_o they_o 4._o isa_n 46.3_o 4._o bear_v we_o both_o when_o thy_o young_a one_o and_o when_o never_o so_o age_v carry_v we_o on_o they_o still_o because_o our_o infirmity_n when_o thou_o be_v with_o it_o be_v strength_n and_o our_o strength_n when_o it_o be_v only_o our_o own_o be_v infirmity_n and_o all_o our_o good_a life_n always_o only_o with_o thou_o and_o because_o we_o turn_v away_o from_o thou_o we_o lose_v it_o let_v we_o now_o return_v unto_o thou_o o_o lord_n that_o we_o may_v repossess_v it_o for_o with_o thou_o live_v our_o good_a still_o without_o any_o decay_n thereof_o for_o thou_o thyself_o art_n it_o and_o we_o need_v not_o fear_n lest_o at_o our_o return_n our_o former_a habitation_n shall_v be_v ruin_v and_o demolish_v for_o we_o indeed_o in_o depart_v from_o thence_o fall_n and_o come_v to_o ruin_n but_o our_o house_n in_o this_o our_o absence_n which_o be_v thy_o eternity_n can_v never_o fall_v lib_fw-la v._o chap._n i._n oblation_n of_o his_o confession_n to_o god_n their_o end_n be_v to_o set_v forth_o his_o praise_n accept_v o_o lord_n the_o sacrifice_n of_o these_o my_o confession_n offer_v unto_o thou_o from_o the_o hand_n of_o my_o tongue_n 35.10_o psal_n 35.10_o make_v and_o move_v by_o thou_o to_o confess_v unto_o thy_o name_n and_o heal_v thou_o all_o my_o bone_n that_o they_o may_v say_v o_o lord_n who_o be_v like_a unto_o thou_o it_o be_v not_o at_o all_o to_o teach_v thou_o that_o which_o be_v do_v within_o he_o when_o any_o one_o confess_v it_o unto_o thou_o for_o the_o closeness_n of_o the_o heart_n exclude_v not_o thy_o eye_n nor_o the_o hardness_n of_o it_o repel_v thy_o hand_n but_o that_o thou_o do_v often_o in_o pity_n and_o otherwile_v also_o in_o vengeance_n melt_v and_o dissolve_v it_o at_o pleasure_n and_o there_o be_v nothing_o hide_v from_o thy_o heat_n 19.6_o psa_fw-la 19.6_o but_o yet_o let_v my_o soul_n be_v still_o praise_v and_o speak_v good_a of_o thou_o that_o for_o this_o it_o may_v love_v thou_o and_o let_v it_o be_v confess_v thy_o mercy_n unto_o thou_o that_o for_o they_o it_o may_v praise_v thou_o the_o whole_a creation_n cease_v not_o nor_o rest_v from_o praise_v thou_o both_o every_o spirit_n by_o their_o own_o mouth_n turn_v immediate_o upon_o thou_o and_o all_o corporeal_v also_o live_v or_o inanimate_a by_o the_o mouth_n of_o those_o who_o in_o they_o contemplate_v thy_o wisdom_n that_o so_o our_o weary_a and_o sick_a soul_n may_v thus_o erect_v itself_o and_o move_v towards_o thou_o and_o lean_v on_o the_o thing_n which_o thou_o have_v make_v may_v by_o they_o be_v conduct_v unto_o thou_o who_o make_v they_o all_o so_o admirable_o and_o there_o find_v refection_n and_o true_a strength_n chap._n ii_o invitation_n of_o all_o other_o stray_a sinner_n to_o return_v to_o the_o omnipotent_a god_n by_o confession_n the_o wicked_a discontent_a and_o restless_a may_v depart_v and_o fly_v from_o thou_o but_o still_o thou_o see_v they_o and_o divide_v the_o darkness_n 1.4.31_o gen._n 1.4.31_o and_o behold_v all_o thing_n round_o about_o they_o be_v still_o fair_a and_o lovely_a in_o thy_o sight_n only_o themselves_o deform_v for_o alas_o in_o thus_o abandon_v thou_o how_o have_v they_o hurt_v or_o frustrate_v thou_o at_o all_o or_o any_o way_n discompose_v thy_o absolute_a empire_n from_o the_o high_a heaven_n to_o the_o low_a abyss_n just_a and_o entire_a for_o whither_o flee_v they_o when_o they_o flee_v from_o before_o thy_o face_n or_o where_o be_v they_o not_o discover_v by_o thou_o they_o flee_v only_o 4.16_o gen._n 4.16_o *_o that_o themselves_o may_v not_o see_v thou_o when_o see_v they_o and_o may_v yet_o blindfold_a still_o run_v against_o thou_o who_o never_o departe_v from_o any_o of_o the_o thing_n make_v by_o thou_o *_o that_o they_o be_v unjust_a may_v run_v against_o thou_o and_o so_o be_v just_o hurt_v by_o thou_o withdraw_v from_o thy_o lenity_n and_o softness_n and_o so_o dash_v against_o thy_o uprightness_n and_o fall_v upon_o thy_o sharpness_n ignorant_a that_o thou_o who_o be_v circumscribe_v by_o no_o place_n be_v yet_o in_o every_o place_n and_o the_o only_o he_o that_o be_v present_a to_o those_o who_o be_v far_o from_o thou_o let_v they_o then_o return_v and_o let_v they_o seek_v thou_o because_o though_o they_o have_v leave_v thou_o their_o creator_n yet_o have_v not_o thou_o leave_v thy_o creature_n let_v they_o then_o return_v only_o and_o seek_v thou_o and_o lo_o thou_o be_v present_a in_o their_o heart_n in_o the_o heart_n of_o all_o those_o who_o make_v confession_n unto_o thou_o and_o cast_v themselves_o upon_o thou_o and_o in_o thy_o bosom_n deplore_v their_o former_a vexatious_a deviation_n and_o then_o how_o will_v thou_o indulgent_a wipe_v off_o again_o such_o tear_n from_o their_o eye_n and_o this_o wipe_v also_o provoke_v more_o tear_n and_o make_v they_o to_o joy_n in_o these_o sorrowing_n because_o thou_o o_o lord_n and_o not_o man_n flesh_n and_o blood_n but_o thou_o o_o lord_n that_o creat_v they_o do_v thus_o recreate_v and_o comfort_v they_o where_o be_v i_o then_o when_o i_o seek_v for_o thou_o for_o thou_o be_v just_a before_o i_o but_o i_o be_v stray_v from_o myself_o and_o not_o able_a to_o find_v myself_o much_o less_o can_v i_o find_v thou_o chap._n iii_o the_o passage_n of_o the_o 29_o year_n of_o his_o age_n the_o come_n of_o faustus_n a_o eloquent_a manichean_a bishop_n to_o carthage_n the_o philosopher_n tenant_n in_o the_o science_n find_v much_o more_o probable_a than_o the_o manichean_o i_o will_v now_o recount_v before_o my_o god_n the_o story_n of_o the_o tweny-ninth_a year_n of_o my_o age_n there_o be_v then_o come_v to_o carâ—haâ—e_v a_o mani_n hâ—an_n bishop_n call_v faustus_n a_o great_a snare_n of_o the_o devil_n be_v and_o many_o be_v catch_v by_o the_o sweet_a bait_n of_o his_o smooth_a tongue_n which_o though_o i_o also_o much_o rellish_v in_o he_o yet_o can_v i_o well_o distinguish_v it_o from_o the_o verity_n of_o the_o thing_n which_o i_o desire_v to_o learn_v of_o he_o examine_v only_o what_o nourish_v provision_n of_o science_n he_o set_v before_o i_o and_o not_o in_o how_o rich_a a_o dish_n of_o language_n he_o serve_v it_o up_o for_o fame_n have_v before_o report_v he_o most_o know_v in_o all_o excellent_a learning_n and_o exquisite_o skill_v in_o the_o liberal_a arts._n and_o i_o have_v read_v former_o and_o still_o retain_v in_o memory_n much_o of_o the_o philosopher_n tenant_n begin_v to_o compare_v those_o with_o these_o long_a fable_n
pulse_n indicates_z some_o danger_n all_o that_o long_o for_o his_o recovery_n become_v sick_a in_o mind_n as_o he_o in_o body_n he_o become_v somewhat_o better_a and_o walk_v a_o little_a about_o yet_o not_o restore_v to_o his_o former_a strength_n and_o there_o be_v already_o such_o mirth_n upon_o this_o as_o be_v not_o before_o when_o he_o go_v about_o healthful_a and_o lusty_a and_o so_o all_o the_o pleasure_n of_o this_o humane_a life_n arise_v from_o some_o precedence_n of_o pain_n and_o that_o not_o only_o casual_a and_o undesired_a but_o many_o time_n purposely_o and_o industrious_o procure_v eat_v and_o drink_v be_v no_o delight_n without_o the_o forego_n molestation_n of_o hungâ—r_n and_o thirst_n and_o drunkard_n by_o eat_a salt_n thing_n provoke_v that_o bite_a heat_n which_o drink_v may_v afterward_o with_o the_o more_o pleasure_n quench_v and_o allay_v and_o between_o contract_n and_o nuptial_n it_o be_v order_v some_o time_n shall_v intercede_v lest_o when_o once_o marry_v he_o shall_v less_o value_v she_o be_v possess_v who_o he_o first_o long_v not_o for_o be_v after_o espousal_n defer_v this_o hold_v in_o wicked_a and_o profane_a this_o in_o lawful_a and_o allow_v joy_n this_o in_o the_o sincere_a love_n and_o friendship_n this_o in_o he_o who_o have_v be_v dead_a and_o be_v alive_a have_v perish_v and_o be_v recover_v every_n where_o great_a joy_n be_v precede_v with_o great_a anxiety_n what_o be_v this_o o_o lord_n my_o god_n that_o whenas_o thou_o be_v a_o eternal_a joy_n to_o thyself_o and_o when_o as_o something_n also_o that_o be_v from_o thou_o rejoice_v perpetual_o about_o thou_o how_o be_v it_o that_o this_o inferior_a part_n of_o thy_o creature_n so_o alternate_o ebb_v and_o flow_v be_v grieve_v and_o content_v displease_a and_o reconcile_v be_v this_o the_o limit_a measure_n of_o their_o be_v and_o the_o set_a proportion_n thou_o will_v allot_v to_o they_o when_o from_o the_o high_a heaven_n to_o the_o low_a part_n of_o earth_n from_o the_o begin_n to_o the_o end_n of_o time_n from_o the_o angel_n to_o the_o worm_n from_o the_o first_o motion_n to_o the_o last_o the_o several_a sort_n of_o thy_o good_a creature_n be_v place_v by_o thou_o every_o one_o in_o their_o proper_a seat_n and_o all_o thy_o just_a and_o upright_a work_n be_v act_v by_o thou_o every_o one_o in_o their_o proper_a season_n woe_n be_v i_o how_o high_a be_v thou_o in_o the_o high_a &_o how_o profound_a be_v thou_o in_o the_o low_a of_o they_o never_o depart_v from_o we_o and_o yet_o we_o hardly_o attain_v unto_o thou_o chap._n iu._n why_o more_o joy_n in_o the_o conversion_n of_o man_n eminent_a or_o noble_a inspire_v o_o lord_n and_o operate_v excite_v and_o restrain_v inflame_v and_o elevate_v we_o breath_n forth_o thy_o fragrant_a odour_n and_o lustill_v thy_o delicate_a taste_n make_v we_o in_o love_n with_o thou_o and_o let_v we_o run_v after_o thou_o how_o many_o be_v there_o who_o do_v out_o of_o a_o more_o profound_a hell_n of_o darkness_n than_o victorinus_n return_v towards_o thou_o and_o come_v to_o thou_o and_o be_v illuminate_v by_o thou_o and_o receive_v that_o thy_o light_n 1.12_o john_n 1.12_o which_o who_o so_o receive_v have_v power_n also_o give_v they_o to_o become_v thy_o son_n but_o yet_o as_o such_o happen_v to_o be_v less_o know_v abroad_o so_o even_o those_o who_o know_v they_o joy_n less_o for_o they_o for_o where_o more_o man_n rejoice_v there_o every_o one_o have_v more_o joy_n because_o they_o hear_v and_o be_v inflame_v from_o one_o another_z again_o those_o convert_v know_v by_o more_o be_v guide_n to_o more_o in_o the_o way_n to_o salvation_n and_o go_v before_o many_o other_o that_o will_v follow_v and_o therefore_o man_n rejoice_v also_o more_o for_o these_o that_o go_v before_o because_o they_o rejoice_v not_o for_o they_o single_a otherwise_o far_o be_v it_o that_o in_o thy_o tabernacle_n the_o person_n of_o the_o rich_a shall_v be_v accept_v before_o the_o poor_a or_o the_o noble_a before_o the_o ignoble_a when_o as_o rather_o 13.9_o 1_o cor._n 1.27_o 28_o 1_o cor._n 15_o 9_o act_n 13.9_o thou_o have_v choose_v the_o weak_a thing_n of_o the_o world_n to_o confound_v the_o mighty_a and_o base_a thing_n of_o the_o world_n and_o thing_n that_o be_v despise_v have_v thou_o choose_v yea_o and_o thing_n which_o be_v not_o that_o thou_o may_v bring_v to_o nought_o thing_n that_o be_v and_o yet_o the_o same_o least_o of_o thy_o apostle_n by_o who_o tongue_n thou_o speak_v these_o word_n when_o as_o the_o proconful_n paul_n be_v conquer_v of_o his_o pride_n and_o greatness_n by_o his_o arm_n and_o be_v bring_v under_o the_o gentle_a yoke_n of_o thy_o christ_n become_v now_o a_o subject_a of_o the_o great_a king_n he_o himself_o from_o his_o former_a name_n saul_n delight_v to_o be_v call_v paul_n in_o memory_n of_o so_o great_a a_o victory_n for_o the_o enemy_n be_v much_o more_o conquer_a in_o such_o a_o one_o who_o he_o more_o possess_v and_o by_o who_o he_o possess_v more_o and_o the_o proud_a be_v by_o he_o more_o possess_v from_o the_o title_n of_o their_o nobility_n and_o by_o they_o many_o more_o other_o from_o the_o name_n of_o their_o authority_n by_o how_o much_o high_o therefore_o *_o the_o breast_n of_o victorinus_n be_v esteem_v in_o which_o the_o devil_n have_v hold_v and_o fortify_v himself_o as_o a_o impregnable_a for_o it_o and_o *_o the_n tongue_n of_o victorinus_n with_o which_o great_a and_o keen_a weapon_n so_o many_o soul_n have_v be_v slay_v so_o much_o great_a must_n needs_o be_v the_o exultation_n of_o thy_o child_n 2.21_o mat._n 12.29_o 2_o tim._n 2.21_o when_o our_o king_n have_v thus_o bind_v the_o strong_a man_n and_o when_o they_o see_v his_o vessel_n take_v from_o his_o service_n and_o make_v clean_a and_o fit_v for_o thy_o honour_n and_o serviceable_a unto_o to_o the_o lord_n for_o every_o good_a work_n chap._n v._n what_o operation_n the_o story_n of_o victorinus_n have_v upon_o he_o and_o his_o great_a captivity_n under_o former_a ill_a custom_n whilst_o simplicianus_n thy_o servant_n tell_v these_o thing_n of_o victorinus_n i_o be_v inflame_v to_o imitate_v they_o which_o be_v his_o design_n also_o in_o tell_v they_o and_o when_o he_o have_v add_v also_o that_o in_o those_o day_n of_o julian_n the_o emperor_n a_o law_n be_v enact_v prohibit_v all_o christian_n to_o teach_v any_o humane_a literature_n and_o particular_o oratory_n which_o law_n victorinus_n most_o welcom_o entertain_v choose_v rather_o to_o forsake_v his_o own_o loquacious_a school_n than_o thy_o word_n which_o make_v even_o the_o tongue_n of_o infant_n eloquent_a 8.2_o psal_n 8.2_o he_o seem_v to_o i_o in_o this_o not_o more_o valiant_a than_o happy_a in_o gain_v so_o a_o occasion_n of_o a_o total_a vacancy_n and_o attendance_n on_o thou_o which_o thing_n i_o also_o aspired-to_a and_o sigh'd-aft_a but_o be_v fast_o bind_v not_o with_o another_o iron_n but_o those_o of_o my_o own_o hard_a and_o iron_n will_n the_o enemy_n possess_v my_o perverse_a desire_n and_o of_o they_o have_v make_v a_o chain_n and_o fast-tied_n i_o with_o it_o for_o of_o a_o perverse_a will_v there_o be_v make_v lust_n and_o in_o serve_v that_o lust_n there_o be_v make_v custom_n and_o not_o resist_v that_o custom_n it_o become_v necessity_n with_o which_o as_o with_o certain_a link_n fasten_v one_o within_o another_o this_o cruel_a servitude_n hold_v i_o close_o shackle_a and_o the_o new_a will_n but_o now_o begin_v to_o grow_v in_o i_o by_o which_o i_o desire_v disengage_v of_o all_o other_o love_v free_o to_o serve_v thou_o and_o by_o which_o i_o wish_v to_o enjoy_v thou_o o_o my_o god_n the_o only_a certain_a pleasure_n be_v not_o yet_o able_a to_o master_v the_o former_a will_n strengthen_v with_o age_n so_o these_o two_o will_n of_o i_o the_o one_o old_a the_o other_o new_a one_o carnal_a the_o other_o spiritual_a combat_v one_o another_o and_o in_o their_o disagreeance_n rend_v and_o divide_v my_o soul_n thus_o i_o understand_v myself_o be_v the_o experiment_n that_o which_o i_o have_v read_v how_o the_o flesh_n lu_v against_o the_o spirit_n and_o the_o spirit_n against_o the_o flâ—sh_n and_o it_o be_v i_o that_o be_v in_o they_o both_o but_o more_o i_o in_o that_o which_o in_o i_o i_o now_o allow_v than_o in_o that_o 7.20_o rom._n 7.20_o which_o in_o i_o i_o disallow_v for_o in_o this_o it_o be_v more_o not_o i_o because_o in_o a_o great_a part_n i_o rather_o suffer_v it_o against_o my_o mind_n than_o willing_o act_v it_o but_o yet_o this_o custom_n now_o so_o eager_o war_a against_o i_o be_v contract_v by_o i_o and_o willing_o it_o be_v that_o i_o come_v thither_o whither_o now_o i_o will_v that_o i_o have_v never_o come_v and_o who_o can_v just_o reprehend_v this_o tyranny_n
it_o you_o have_v hear_v the_o unlearned_a start_n up_o and_o take_v heaven_n by_o force_n whilst_o we_o with_o all_o our_o science_n cowardly_a and_o heartless_a see_v how_o we_o wallow_v still_o in_o flesh_n and_o blood_n what_o because_o they_o have_v outstrip_v and_o be_v go_v before_o we_o be_v we_o ashamed_a to_o follow_v and_o be_v we_o not_o more_o ashamed_a at_o least_o not_o so_o much_o as_o to_o follow_v they_o some_o such_o thing_n say_v and_o straight_o my_o rage_n fling_v away_o from_o he_o who_o stand_v silent_a and_o behold_v i_o with_o much_o amazement_n for_o neither_o do_v i_o speak_v language_n usual_a and_o beside_o my_o eye_n forehead_n cheek_n colour_n the_o accent_n of_o my_o voice_n more_o speak_v my_o passion_n than_o my_o word_n do_v there_o be_v a_o little_a garden_n belong_v to_o our_o lodging_n which_o we_o have_v use_v of_o as_o of_o the_o whole_a house_n our_o hospitable_a friend_n the_o master_n thereof_o dwell_v elsewhere_o thither_o this_o tumult_n in_o my_o breast_n carry_v i_o away_o where_o none_o may_v hinder_v the_o hot_a contention_n which_o i_o have_v engage_v with_o myself_o until_o it_o conclude_v in_o that_o issue_n which_o thou_o already_o know_v but_o not_o yet_o i._o only_a i_o be_v in_o a_o sober_a rage_n and_o suffer_v a_o death_n that_o will_v beget_v life_n well_o know_v what_o evil_a i_o then_o be_v not_o know_v what_o good_a within_o a_o little_a while_n i_o be_v to_o be_v thus_o away_o i_o go_v into_o the_o garden_n and_o alipius_n follow_v close_o after_o i_o for_o i_o count_v my_o privacy_n not_o the_o less_o for_o his_o presence_n nor_o indeed_o will_v he_o forsake_v i_o who_o he_o see_v in_o such_o disorder_n we_o sit_v we_o down_o as_o remote_a as_o may_v be_v from_o the_o house_n i_o fretre_v in_o my_o spirit_n and_o rage_v with_o most_o implacable_a indignation_n that_o i_o do_v not_o go_v into_o a_o strict_a league_n and_o covenant_n with_o thou_o o_o my_o god_n whilst_o all_o my_o bone_n cry_v out_o that_o i_o shall_v enter_v into_o it_o and_o extol_v it_o to_o the_o heaven_n unto_o i_o and_o thither_o i_o need_v not_o go_v either_o in_o ship_n or_o in_o coach_n or_o on_o my_o foot_n no_o not_o so_o far_o as_o i_o go_v from_o the_o house_n to_o this_o seat_n in_o the_o garden_n for_o not_o only_o to_o go_v but_o to_o come_v to_o the_o end_n of_o such_o a_o journey_n be_v nothing_o else_o but_o only_o to_o consent_v and_o to_o be_v willing_a to_o go_v that_o be_v to_o be_v resolute_o and_o entire_o willing_a and_o not_o to_o turn_v and_o toss_v a_o will_n maim_v one_o half_a of_o it_o sometime_o on_o one_o side_n and_o sometime_o on_o another_o in_o one_o part_n raise_v itself_o up_o and_o struggle_v with_o another_o part_n that_o hang_v down_o and_o yet_o how_o many_o thing_n in_o these_o conflict_n of_o my_o linger_a will_n do_v i_o effect_v as_o i_o please_v in_o my_o body_n which_o yet_o those_o who_o will_v always_o can_v do_v as_o if_o perchance_o they_o have_v not_o such_o member_n or_o theâ—e_n be_v tie_v with_o band_n or_o dissolve_v with_o sickness_n or_o some_o other_o way_n restrain_v for_o example_n if_o then_o i_o tear_v off_o my_o hair_n or_o smite_v my_o forehead_n or_o clasp_v my_o hand_n about_o my_o knee_n as_o soon_o as_o i_o please_v present_o i_o do_v it_o yet_o be_v it_o possible_a in_o all_o these_o to_o have_v will_v they_o and_o not_o have_v do_v they_o if_o the_o unpliantness_n of_o my_o joint_n can_v not_o serve_v my_o purpose_n so_o many_o thing_n therefore_o do_v i_o then_o where_o to_o will_v they_o only_o be_v not_o to_o do_v they_o and_o yet_o do_v i_o not_o that_o which_o incomparable_o more_o content_v i_o and_o which_o as_o soon_o as_o i_o will_v i_o may_v do_v because_o as_o soon_o as_o i_o will_v i_o may_v will_v it_o for_o here_o the_o ability_n be_v the_o same_o that_o the_o will_n and_o to_o will_v only_o be_v to_o do_v it_o and_o yet_o it_o be_v not_o do_v and_o the_o body_n yield_v a_o more_o easy_a obedience_n to_o the_o small_a willing_a of_o the_o soul_n to_o bend_v its_o limb_n according_a to_o the_o other_o beck_n than_o the_o soul_n itself_o do_v to_o itself_o and_o that_o for_o its_o great_a joy_n and_o pleasure_n and_o this_o to_o be_v perfect_v and_o accomplish_v only_o by_o will_v it_o chap._n ix_o the_o fierce_a combat_n there_o between_o the_o flesh_n and_o the_o spirit_n and_o his_o sad_a complaint_n of_o the_o great_a difficulty_n the_o will_n have_v to_o command_v itself_o when_o it_o so_o easy_o command_v the_o other_o member_n from_o whence_o such_o a_o monster_n and_o how_o can_v this_o be_v let_v thy_o mercy_n enlighten_v i_o and_o let_v i_o inquire_v if_o perhaps_o in_o these_o great_a secrecy_n of_o man_n punishment_n for_o sin_n and_o the_o most_o obscure_a judgement_n of_o the_o son_n of_o adam_n any_o thing_n may_v appear_v that_o may_v afford_v i_o some_o answer_n whence_o such_o a_o monster_n and_o how_o can_v this_o be_v the_o mind_n command_v the_o body_n and_o be_v present_o obey_v the_o mind_n command_v itself_o and_o be_v oppose_v the_o mind_n command_v the_o motion_n of_o the_o hand_n and_o so_o speedy_o be_v it_o execute_v as_o the_o obedience_n be_v scarce_o distinguishable_a from_o the_o command_n and_o yet_o the_o mind_n be_v a_o spirit_n and_o the_o hand_n a_o body_n the_o same_o mind_n command_v the_o mind_n to_o will_v a_o thing_n the_o very_a same_o essence_n with_o it_o and_o yet_o it_o do_v it_o not_o whence_o such_o a_o monster_n and_o how_o can_v this_o be_v it_o command_v i_o say_v that_o it_o shall_v will_v a_o thing_n which_o can_v not_o command_v it_o unless_o it_o will_v it_o first_o and_o yet_o that_o be_v not_o do_v which_o it_o command_v indeed_o it_o be_v not_o whole_o willing_a therefore_o neither_o do_v it_o whole_o command_v for_o only_o so_o far_o it_o command_v as_o it_o will_v and_o so_o far_o what_o it_o command_v be_v not_o do_v as_o it_o will_v not_o that_o it_o shall_v be_v do_v because_o the_o will_n command_v that_o there_o shall_v be_v a_o willing_a and_o nothing_o else_o command_v this_o but_o only_o itself_o upon_o itself_o therefore_o it_o do_v not_o whole_o command_v it_o and_o therefore_o that_o which_o it_o command_v that_o it_o may_v be_v be_v such_o a_o thing_n as_o be_v not_o already_o for_o if_o the_o will_n be_v already_o whole_o incline_v to_o such_o a_o thing_n it_o will_v not_o command_v that_o such_o inclination_n shall_v be_v because_o it_o be_v already_o both_o to_o will_v and_o yet_o to_o will_z in_o part_n therefore_o be_v no_o monster_n but_o a_o sickness_n and_o infirmity_n of_o the_o mind_n which_o can_v entire_o arise_v when_o lift_v up_o by_o the_o truth_n because_o it_o be_v counterpoise_v by_o vicious_a custom_n and_o therefore_o only_o there_o be_v two_o willing_n because_o one_o of_o they_o be_v not_o total_a and_o so_o what_o be_v want_v to_o the_o one_o make_v up_o and_o fortify_v the_o other_o chap._n x._o let_v they_o perish_v from_o before_o thy_o face_n o_o god_n as_o the_o speaker_n of_o lie_n and_o impostor_n do_v perish_v who_o when_o they_o observe_v in_o our_o deliberate_v two_o will_n do_v affirm_v two_o distinct_a mind_n in_o we_o of_o a_o different_a nature_n the_o one_o good_a and_o the_o other_o bad_a for_o when_o i_o thus_o deliberate_v at_o last_o to_o enter_v upon_o the_o service_n of_o my_o lord_n god_n as_o i_o have_v long_o design_v iâ—_n be_v i_o that_o will_v and_o i_o also_o that_o nill_v it_o it_o be_v the_o â—â—me_n i_o who_o as_o yet_o neither_o full_o will_v nor_o full_o nill_v it_o and_o therefore_o be_v in_o contention_n with_o myself_o and_o divide_v and_o rend_v from_o myself_o and_o this_o rent_n in_o i_o indeed_o be_v make_v against_o my_o will_n yet_o it_o signify_v not_o in_o i_o the_o inhabitancy_n of_o some_o foreign_a mind_n but_o the_o punishment_n of_o my_o own_o and_o therefore_o it_o be_v no_o more_o i_o that_o wrought_v this_o distraction_n but_o sin_n that_o dwell_v in_o i_o from_o the_o punishment_n of_o that_o first_o more_o freely-committed_n offence_n inasmuch_o as_o i_o be_o a_o son_n of_o adam_n and_o certain_o if_o there_o be_v so_o many_o contrary_a nature_n in_o we_o as_o there_o be_v in_o we_o contrary_a desire_n there_o will_v not_o be_v two_o principle_n only_o one_o of_o our_o good_a inclination_n the_o other_o of_o our_o bad_a but_o must_v be_v many_o also_o of_o the_o bad_a and_o many_o of_o the_o good_a since_o we_o have_v many_o will_n and_o desire_n oppose_v and_o hinder_v one_o another_o and_o yet_o all_o of_o they_o bad_a and_o many_o repugn_v also_o one_o to_o another_o yet_o
from_o a_o deceitful_a tongue_n can_v only_o more_o increase_n but_o not_o extinguish_v it_o nevertheless_o because_o that_o by_o reason_n of_o thy_o name_n now_o so_o glorify_v through_o the_o world_n such_o our_o purpose_n and_o vow_n must_v needs_o find_v many_o commender_n it_o seem_v *_o that_o it_o may_v appear_v to_o have_v some_o relish_n of_o vainglory_n in_o i_o not_o to_o have_v patience_n till_o a_o vacation_n so_o near_o but_o to_o desert_v a_o profession_n so_o public_a and_o eye_v by_o all_o before_o it_o and_z *_o that_o the_o mouth_n of_o all_o man_n reflect_v on_o this_o my_o act_n and_o how_o near_o a_o breaking-up_a school_n i_o will_v yet_o prevent_v may_v say_v many_o thing_n as_o if_o i_o affect_v to_o magnify_v myself_o and_o seem_v some_o great_a one_o and_o yet_o what_o matter_a it_o to_o i_o that_o man_n shall_v divine_v and_o dispute_v my_o intention_n 14.16_o rom._n 14.16_o or_o that_o our_o good_a shall_v be_v thus_o evil-spoken_a of_o but_o beside_o the_o opportunity_n of_o the_o vintage-vacation_n so_o it_o be_v that_o in_o the_o heat_n of_o summer_n my_o lung_n begin_v *_o to_o fail_v under_o the_o too_o much_o toil_n of_o my_o school_n difficult_o *_o to_n fetch_v breath_n and_o by_o the_o pain_n of_o my_o breast_n to_o signify_v their_o hurt_n and_o now_o *_o to_o refuse_v any_o very_a loud_a or_o long_o speak_v which_o thing_n at_o the_o first_o have_v much_o trouble_v i_o because_o it_o will_v force_v i_o either_o they_o be_v incurable_a upon_o necessity_n to_o give_v over_o so_o burdensome_a a_o profession_n or_o if_o curable_a yet_o to_o intermit_v it_o but_o after_o that_o a_o resolute_a will_n to_o attend_v only_o on_o thou_o and_o to_o see_v how_o that_o thou_o be_v the_o lord_n be_v raise_v and_o confirm_v in_o i_o thou_o know_v o_o my_o god_n my_o joy_n that_o i_o have_v this_o also_o no_o false_a excuse_n to_o sweeten_v the_o discontent_n of_o those_o man_n who_o for_o their_o child_n benefit_n envy_v my_o liberty_n full_o of_o such_o joy_n i_o patient_o therefore_o endure_v that_o interval_n of_o time_n till_o it_o shall_v be_v run_v out_o i_o know_v not_o whither_o they_o be_v about_o some_o twenty_o day_n but_o they_o be_v endure_v not_o without_o some_o patience_n for_o i_o be_v already_o rid_v of_o those_o ambition_n which_o former_o help_v i_o to_o bear_v that_o heavy_a burden_n with_o which_o now_o therefore_o i_o shall_v have_v be_v overlay_v have_v not_o patience_n take_v their_o place_n some_o of_o thy_o servant_n my_o brethren_n may_v blame_v i_o for_o this_o that_o have_v a_o heart_n now_o full_o resign_v to_o thy_o service_n i_o shall_v any_o long_o though_o but_o for_o a_o hour_n sit_v down_o in_o the_o chair_n of_o lie_n and_o for_o my_o part_n i_o do_v not_o oppose_v they_o but_o thou_o o_o lord_n so_o full_a of_o mercy_n have_v thou_o not_o pardon_v and_o remit_v this_o sin_n also_o unto_o i_o among_o many_o other_o so_o horrible_a and_o deadly_a in_o the_o holy_a water_n of_o my_o baptism_n chap._n iii_o verecundus_n a_o citizen_n of_o milan_n offer_v his_o countryhouse_n for_o their_o retirement_n the_o death_n of_o verecundus_n and_o of_o nebridius_fw-la not_o long_a after_o s._n augustine_n conversion_n be_v both_o first_o make_v christian_n 6._o christian_n see_v l._n 8._o cap._n 6._o verecundus_n be_v much_o afflict_v concern_v this_o our_o purpose_n because_o thus_o he_o see_v himself_o by_o reason_n of_o the_o many_o bond_n wherewith_o he_o be_v most_o strait_o tie_v deprive_v of_o our_o society_n himself_o not_o yet_o a_o christian_a though_o his_o wife_n a_o baptize_v professor_n of_o the_o faith_n and_o yet_o be_v he_o *_o retard_v by_o she_o as_o one_o of_o his_o straight_a fetter_n from_o follow_v our_o intend_a course_n *_o and_o do_v deny_v to_o become_v a_o christian_a upon_o any_o other_o term_n than_o these_o he_o can_v not_o perform_v true_o he_o very_o courteous_o offer_v and_o lend_v we_o for_o the_o time_n of_o our_o abode_n in_o that_o place_n the_o use_n of_o his_o countryhouse_n thou_o o_o lord_n shall_v recompense_v he_o at_o the_o resurrection_n of_o the_o righteous_a since_o the_o lot_n of_o the_o righteous_a be_v already_o happen_v to_o he_o who_o though_o in_o our_o absence_n after_o we_o have_v remove_v to_o rome_n be_v seize_v by_o a_o corporal_a sickness_n be_v in_o it_o make_v a_o christian_a and_o a_o fidelis_n and_o so_o depart_v this_o life_n in_o which_o thing_n thou_o have_v mercy_n not_o only_o on_o he_o but_o on_o we_o lest_o consider_v the_o great_a courtesy_n of_o this_o friend_n towards_o we_o and_o not_o able_a to_o number_v he_o among_o thy_o flock_n we_o shall_v have_v be_v torment_v with_o too_o disconsolate_a a_o sorrow_n thanks_o be_v to_o thou_o our_o god_n thy_o care_n we_o be_v all_o thy_o exhortation_n and_o thy_o consolation_n sufficient_o show_v it_o faithful_a in_o all_o thy_o promise_n thou_o shall_v return_v to_o verecundus_n for_o that_o his_o house_n at_o cassiacum_n where_o from_o the_o tumult_n of_o the_o world_n we_o quiet_o repose_v in_o thou_o i._o psal_n 68.15_o 16._o vulg._n in_o in_o monte_fw-fr incascato_fw-la monte_fw-fr tuo_fw-la monte_fw-fr ube_fw-mi i._o the_o amenity_n of_o thy_o eternally-green_a and_o flourish_a paradise_n because_o thou_o have_v remit_v unto_o he_o his_o sin_n here_o on_o earth_n in_o the_o mountain_n of_o fat_a pasture_n the_o hill_n of_o god_n that_o fruitful_a hill_n thus_o be_v verecundus_n afflict_v but_o nebridius_fw-la as_o much_o joy_v for_o although_o he_o not_o as_o yet_o a_o christian_a have_v former_o fall_v into_o the_o pit_n of_o that_o most_o pernicious_a error_n to_o believe_v the_o flesh_n of_o thy_o son_n only_o a_o empty_a apparition_n yet_o now_o reclaim_v from_o it_o he_o be_v a_o most_o earnest_a inq_fw-fr isitor_n of_o truth_n though_o not_o as_o yet_o initiate_v in_o any_o sacrament_n of_o thy_o church_n who_o become_v also_o not_o long_o after_o our_o conversion_n and_o regeneration_n by_o thy_o baptism_n a_o faithful_a catholic_n and_o serve_v thou_o in_o all_o continency_n and_o chastity_n among_o his_o kindred_n in_o afri_fw-la k_n and_o have_v convert_v all_o his_o family_n to_o christianity_n thou_o have_v loose_v from_o the_o flesh_n and_o now_o he_o live_v unto_o thou_o in_o abraham_n bosom_n whatever_o it_o be_v that_o be_v signify_v by_o that_o bosom_n there_o my_o nebridius_fw-la life_n my_o sweet_a friend_n and_o thy_o adopt_a son_n there_o he_o live_v for_o what_o other_o place_n can_v receive_v such_o a_o soul_n in_o that_o place_n he_o live_v concern_v which_o he_o ask_v of_o i_o a_o poor_a unexperienced_a man_n so_o many_o question_n he_o now_o lay_v his_o ear_n no_o more_o to_o my_o mouth_n but_o his_o spiritual_a mouth_n to_o thy_o fountain_n and_o there_o drink_v wisdom_n to_o his_o fill_n endless_o happy_a yet_o can_v i_o imagine_v he_o so_o inebriate_v therewith_o that_o he_o forget_v i_o since_o thou_o also_o o_o lord_n who_o he_o drink_v be_v mindful_a of_o i_o thus_o therefore_o it_o be_v with_o we_o at_o that_o time_n we_o comfort_v verecundus_n much_o grieve_v yet_o without_o diminution_n of_o friendship_n for_o such_o our_o conversion_n and_o *_o exhort_v he_o to_o a_o profession_n of_o the_o faith_n suit_v with_o his_o condition_n namely_o with_o a_o marry_a life_n and_o *_o attend_v for_o nebridius_fw-la when_o he_o will_v run_v the_o same_o course_n of_o life_n with_o we_o which_o he_o may_v present_o and_o be_v upon_o the_o point_n to_o do_v it_o every_o moment_n when_o behold_v those_o day_n be_v at_o last_o run_v out_o which_o seem_v so_o long_o and_o many_o from_o the_o affection_n i_o have_v of_o a_o vacant_a liberty_n that_o i_o may_v sing_v from_o the_o innermost_a marrow_n of_o my_o soul_n tibi_fw-la dixit_fw-la cor_fw-la meum_fw-la 27.2_o psal_n 27.2_o my_o heart_n have_v say_v unto_o thou_o i_o have_v seek_v thy_o face_n and_o thy_o face_n o_o lord_n will_v i_o seek_v chap._n iu._n his_o retire_n in_o the_o vacation_n after_o his_o school_n dissolve_v to_o the_o countryhouse_n of_o verecundus_n his_o meditation_n on_o the_o four_o psalm_n and_o his_o several_a writing_n there_o and_o the_o miraculous_a cure_n of_o his_o violent_a toothache_n after_o he_o be_v render_v thereby_o speechless_a and_o now_o be_v the_o day_n come_v wherein_o i_o shall_v actual_o be_v release_v from_o my_o professorship_n in_o rhetoric_n from_o which_o i_o be_v release_v before_o in_o affection_n and_o it_o be_v do_v and_o thou_o now_o free_v my_o tongue_n from_o what_o thou_o have_v before_o free_v my_o heart_n and_o i_o bless_v thou_o with_o much_o rejoice_v and_o so_o retire_v to_o the_o country_n villa_n cassiacum_n villa_n at_o cassiacum_n with_o all_o my_o near_a friend_n where_o *_o what_o i_o do_v in_o my_o writing_n now_o
what_o vast_a astonishable_a thing_n o_o my_o god_n a_o profound_a and_o infinite_a multiplicity_n and_o this_o be_v my_o soul_n and_o this_o be_v i_o myself_o what_o a_o thing_n therefore_o be_v myself_o what_o a_o nature_n be_o i_o a_o various_a and_o multiforme_a life_n and_o exceed_o immense_a in_o the_o extent_n of_o its_o power_n and_o behold_v through_o these_o innumerable_a field_n and_o cave_n and_o sellar_n of_o my_o memory_n innumerable_o full_o of_o innumerable_a sort_n of_o thing_n by_o so_o many_o several_a way_n convey_v in_o thither_o through_o all_o those_o thing_n i_o fly_v i_o run_v i_o dive_v this_o way_n and_o that_o way_n as_o far_o as_o i_o be_o able_a and_o nowhere_o can_v i_o find_v a_o end_n so_o great_a be_v the_o power_n of_o memory_n so_o great_a the_o power_n of_o this_o life_n in_o man_n even_o whilst_o he_o be_v yet_o mortal_a what_o shall_v i_o do_v then_o o_o thou_o my_o true_a life_n my_o god_n i_o will_v also_o pass_v beyond_o this_o power_n of_o i_o call_v memory_n that_o i_o may_v arrive_v yet_o close_o unto_o thou_o that_o sweet_a light_n after_o which_o i_o seek_v lo_o i_o ascend_v by_o this_o my_o soul_n unto_o thou_o who_o remain_v unto_o i_o elevate_v above_o it_o i_o will_v pass_v beyond_o that_o my_o faculty_n call_v memory_n desirous_a to_o attain_v thou_o so_o far_o as_o thou_o be_v attainable_a and_o to_o inhere_o in_o thou_o so_o far_o as_o i_o be_o capable_a of_o union_n to_o thou_o for_o a_o memory_n i_o find_v also_o in_o the_o beast_n and_o foul_n otherwise_o neither_o their_o former_a den_n nor_o nest_n can_v be_v repair_v to_o nor_o many_o other_o thing_n do_v wherein_o we_o discover_v their_o constant_a custom_n but_o nothing_o be_v accustom_v to_o without_o memory_n i_o will_v therefore_o pass_v over_o this_o memory_n that_o so_o i_o may_v arrive_v at_o he_o who_o have_v make_v i_o otherwise_o then_o the_o fourfootedbeast_n and_o wise_a than_o the_o wing_a foul_a i_o will_v leave_v the_o memory_n but_o then_o where_o shall_v i_o find_v thou_o o_o true_a good_a and_o secure_a pleasure_n but_o then_o where_o shall_v i_o find_v thou_o chap._n xviii_o for_o if_o i_o find_v thou_o beside_o or_o out_o of_o my_o memory_n i_o must_v have_v forget_v thou_o and_o how_o then_o shall_v i_o find_v thou_o if_o i_o have_v no_o remembrance_n of_o thou_o when_o the_o woman_n have_v lose_v her_o groat_n and_o seek_v it_o with_o a_o candle_n if_o she_o have_v not_o remember_v it_o how_o can_v she_o have_v find_v it_o for_o when_o she_o have_v find_v it_o how_o can_v she_o know_v whether_o that_o be_v it_o of_o which_o she_o have_v no_o remembrance_n chap._n xxiv_o far_o have_v i_o travel_v in_o memory_n seek_v thou_o o_o lord_n and_o i_o have_v not_o find_v the_o at_o all_o out_o of_o it_o for_o since_o i_o first_o learn_v thou_o thou_o abide_v in_o my_o memory_n and_o there_o i_o find_v thou_o whenever_o i_o recall_v thou_o to_o mind_n and_o enjoy_v delight_n in_o thou_o in_o this_o place_n be_v those_o my_o holy_a pleasure_n which_o thy_o charity_n and_o thy_o mercy_n have_v bestow_v upon_o i_o take_v pity_n upon_o my_o poverty_n chap._n xxv_o but_o where_o be_v thou_o resident_a in_o my_o memory_n thou_o the_o lord_n what_o lodging_n have_v thou_o make_v there_o for_o thou_o what_o sanctuary_n have_v thou_o build_v i_o pass_v by_o the_o low_a part_n thereof_o common_a with_o beast_n because_o in_o my_o remember_v thou_o i_o find_v thou_o not_o there_o among_o the_o image_n of_o corporeal_a thing_n and_o i_o come_v to_o the_o part_n thereof_o where_o be_v store_v the_o affection_n of_o my_o soul_n neither_o yet_o there_o find_v i_o thou_o and_o i_o have_v enter_v into_o the_o very_a seat_n and_o lodging_n of_o my_o mind_n itself_o which_o seat_n also_o be_v there_o in_o my_o memory_n because_o the_o mind_n remember_v also_o its_o self_n and_o neither_o waist_n thou_o there_o for_o as_o thou_o be_v no_o image_n of_o a_o body_n nor_o no_o affection_n of_o the_o mind_n so_o neither_o be_v thou_o the_o mind_n or_o soul_n itself_o but_o the_o lord_n god_n of_o this_o soul_n thou_o be_v and_o all_o these_o thing_n be_v subject_a to_o change_v but_o thou_o remain_v for_o ever_o unchangeable_a high_a above_o all_o thing_n and_o yet_o have_v thou_o vouchsafe_v to_o dwell_v in_o my_o memory_n since_o the_o time_n i_o have_v learn_v thou_o chap._n xxvi_o that_o god_n who_o he_o love_v be_v *_o something_o within_o but_o yet_o above_o his_o soul_n *_o not_o confine_v by_o place_n omnipresent_v etc._n etc._n but_o then_o where_o find_v i_o thou_o that_o i_o may_v learn_v thou_o for_o neither_o waist_n thou_o already_o in_o my_o memory_n before_o i_o learn_v thou_o where_o then_o find_v i_o thou_o o_o my_o lord_n that_o i_o may_v learn_v thou_o but_o in_o thyself_o above_o i_o yet_o nowhere_o have_v any_o place_n or_o space_n between_o we_o and_o thou_o and_o we_o go_v far_o from_o thou_o and_o come_v near_o unto_o thou_o and_o yet_o not_o where_o have_v thou_o any_o place_n but_o thou_o the_o truth_n art_n in_o every_o place_n present_a and_z giving_z audience_n to_o all_o consult_v thou_o and_o at_o the_o same_o time_n thou_o give_v answer_v unto_o all_o consult_v thou_o thing_n never_o so_o many_o or_o diverse_a and_o clear_o thou_o answer_v unto_o all_o but_o all_o do_v not_o clear_o hear_v thou_o all_o consult_v thou_o about_o what_o they_o please_v but_o not_o always_o hear_v from_o thou_o what_o please_v they_o and_o among_o they_o he_o be_v thy_o best_a servant_n who_o desire_v not_o so_o much_o to_o hear_v from_o thou_o what_o shall_v be_v conformable_a to_o his_o will_n but_o rather_o to_o conform_v his_o will_n to_o whatever_o he_o shall_v hear_v from_o thou_o chap._n xxvii_o that_o though_o he_o now_o true_o love_v god_n abstract_v from_o and_o far_o above_o all_o other_o creature_n and_o olso_o above_o himself_o too_o too_o late_o have_v i_o find_v and_o begin_v to_o love_v thou_o o_o beauty_n so_o ancient_a and_o yet_o so_o new_a too_o too_o late_o begin_v i_o to_o love_v thou_o and_o behold_v thou_o be_v within_o i_o and_o i_o abroad_o and_o there_o i_o seek_v thou_o and_z so_o deform_v a_o wretch_n hot_o court_v those_o beauty_n which_o thou_o have_v make_v thou_o be_v with_o i_o but_o i_o be_v not_o with_o thou_o and_o even_o those_o thing_n keep_v i_o a_o great_a distance_n from_o thou_o which_o have_v no_o be_v but_o that_o they_o have_v in_o thou_o but_o thou_o have_v call_v thou_o have_v cry_v out_o and_o pierce_v my_o deafness_n thou_o have_v lighten_v thou_o have_v stream_v forth_o and_o dispel_v my_o blindness_n thou_o have_v send_v forth_o thy_o fragrant_a perfume_n and_o i_o have_v scent_v thy_o odour_n and_o do_v pant_v after_o thou_o i_o have_v taste_v thy_o sweet_n and_o do_v hunger_n and_o thirst_n after_o they_o thou_o have_v touch_v i_o and_o i_o be_o all-inflamed_n after_o thy_o fruition_n chap._n xxviii_o yet_o he_o enjoy_v not_o as_o yet_o a_o perfect_a union_n unto_o he_o but_o have_v a_o perpetual_a combat_n with_o many_o other_o false_a joy_n and_o grief_n and_o fear_n when_o once_o i_o shall_v be_v unite_v to_o thou_o and_o inhere_o in_o thou_o with_o all_o myself_o then_o shall_v i_o no_o more_o suffer_v any_o sort_n of_o these_o grief_n and_o labour_n and_o then_o my_o life_n shall_v be_v true_o alive_a when_o total_o full_a of_o thou_o but_o now_o since_o all_o that_o be_v fill_v with_o thou_o be_v also_o elevate_v by_o thou_o therefore_o be_o i_o still_o such_o a_o burden_n to_o myself_o because_o i_o be_o not_o yet_o full_a of_o thou_o my_o vain_a joy_n to_o be_v deplore_v contend_v still_o in_o i_o with_o my_o wholesome_a sorrow_n to_o be_v much_o joy_v in_o and_o to_o what_o side_n the_o victory_n incline_v i_o know_v not_o woe_n be_v i_o my_o lord_n have_v thou_o pity_v on_o i_o again_o my_o evil_a sorrow_n contend_v within_o i_o with_o my_o holy_a joy_n vulgar_a job_n 7.1_o old_a vulgar_a and_o to_o which_o side_n the_o victory_n incline_v yet_o i_o know_v not_o woe_n be_v i_o my_o lord_n have_v thou_o pity_v on_o i_o woe_n be_v i_o behold_v i_o conceal_v not_o my_o wound_n from_o thou_o thou_o be_v a_o physician_n i_o be_o sick_a thou_o be_v full_a of_o mercy_n i_o of_o misery_n be_v not_o man_n life_n upon_o the_o earth_n a_o continual_a temptation_n and_o who_o be_v there_o that_o can_v be_v in_o love_n with_o such_o trouble_n and_o difficulty_n thou_o command_v that_o they_o shall_v be_v suffer_v but_o not_o that_o they_o shall_v be_v love_v no_o man_n love_v what_o he_o suffer_v though_o he_o love_v to_o suffer_v for_o though_o he_o joy_n that_o he_o can_v tolerate_v and_o suffer_v
misery_n i_o present_o meet_v with_o a_o excuse_n for_o it_o whether_o a_o just_a one_o thou_o know_v o_o lord_n for_o i_o do_v suspect_v it_o for_o because_o that_o thou_o *_o have_v command_v we_o not_o only_a continency_n that_o be_v from_o what_o thing_n we_o be_v to_o withdraw_v our_o love_n but_o also_o justice_n that_o be_v where_o we_o be_v to_o place_v it_o and_z *_o will_v that_o not_o only_a thyself_o but_o also_o our_o neighbour_n be_v love_v by_o we_o i_o often_o seem_v to_o myself_o *_o to_o be_v please_v with_o his_o proficiency_n or_o with_o the_o good_a hope_n i_o have_v thereof_o when_o i_o be_o delight_v with_o the_o commendation_n of_o one_o understanding_n thing_n a_o right_a and_o again_o *_o to_o be_v grieve_v in_o his_o behalf_n when_o i_o hear_v one_o blame_v what_o he_o be_v ignoraat_fw-mi of_o or_o what_o be_v praise_v worthy_a for_o indeed_o i_o find_v myself_o afflict_v also_o with_o my_o own_o praise_n when_o either_o such_o thing_n be_v commend_v in_o i_o wherein_o i_o displease_v myself_o or_o when_o small_a or_o light_a good_a thing_n in_o i_o be_v more_o value_v than_o they_o ought_v but_o yet_o on_o the_o other_o side_n how_o know_v i_o whether_o i_o be_o not_o thus_o affect_v for_o that_o i_o will_v not_o have_v another_o entertain_v a_o opinion_n concering_n i_o or_o concern_v any_o thing_n i_o different_a from_o my_o own_o and_o this_o not_o because_o his_o good_a or_o benefit_n move_v i_o thereto_o but_o because_o those_o good_a thing_n in_o i_o which_o please_v i_o please_v i_o much_o more_o when_o they_o also_o please_v another_o for_o in_o some_o sort_n it_o be_v not_o i_o that_o be_o commend_v when_o my_o judgement_n also_o concern_v myself_o be_v not_o commend_v as_o when_o those_o thing_n in_o i_o be_v commend_v which_o dislike_v i_o or_o those_o thing_n more_o commend_v which_o less_o like_v i_o be_o i_o not_o therefore_o in_o this_o ignorant_a of_o myself_o in_o thou_o o_o truth_n i_o see_v and_o learn_v that_o not_o for_o my_o own_o sake_n but_o for_o my_o neighbour_n good_a i_o ought_v to_o take_v content_a in_o my_o praise_n but_o whether_o indeed_o it_o be_v so_o i_o be_o ignorant_a and_o less_o do_v i_o know_v of_o myself_o than_o of_o thou_o in_o this_o matter_n therefore_o i_o beseech_v thou_o o_o my_o god_n reveal_v thou_o myself_o unto_o i_o that_o i_o may_v confess_v my_o discover_a wound_n unto_o my_o brethren_n who_o may_v pray_v to_o thou_o for_o i_o let_v i_o yet_o more_o diligent_o question_v myself_o in_o this_o matter_n if_o it_o be_v in_o respect_n of_o my_o neighbour_n benefit_n only_o that_o i_o be_o so_o touch_v with_o my_o own_o praise_n why_o then_o be_o i_o less_o move_v in_o the_o injurious_a disparagement_n of_o another_o than_o if_o it_o be_v of_o myself_o and_o why_o be_o i_o much_o more_o nettle_v with_o a_o contumely_n throw_v upon_o myself_o than_o when_o it_o be_v so_o upon_o another_o in_o my_o presence_n with_o the_o same_o injustice_n 141.5_o psal_n 141.5_o can_v i_o also_o plead_v my_o ignorance_n and_o uncertainty_n for_o this_o or_o shall_v i_o endeavour_v here_o also_o to_o delude_v myself_o and_o nor_o confess_v the_o truth_n before_o thou_o both_o in_o heart_n and_o tongue_n lord_n such_o a_o folly_n put_v thou_o far_o from_o i_o and_o let_v not_o my_o own_o mouth_n go_v about_o to_o anoint_v and_o perfume_v my_o head_n with_o the_o flatter_a oil_n of_o sinner_n i_o be_o poor_a and_o needy_a and_o the_o best_a when_o with_o secret_a lament_n displease_v myself_o and_o invocate_a thy_o mercy_n until_o these_o my_o deficiency_n be_v repair_v and_o perfect_v into_o a_o full_a repose_n and_o peace_n a_o peace_n hide_v from_o the_o eye_n of_o the_o arrogant_a and_o self-conceited_a chap._n xxxviii_o â–³_o incur_v also_o from_o the_o contemn_v of_o praise_n as_o this_o also_o be_v a_o thing_n praiseworthy_a chief_z speech_n that_o be_v eloquent_a and_o good_a action_n that_o be_v public_a and_o eminent_a cause_n in_o we_o a_o most_o perilous_a temptation_n from_o this_o our_o love_n of_o praise_n which_o subtlety_n assay_v to_o procure_v the_o applause_n of_o other_o to_o the_o advance_n of_o my_o own_o private_a excellency_n even_o then_o also_o when_o such_o love_n of_o praise_n in_o i_o be_v censure_v by_o i_o and_o for_o that_o very_a reason_n because_o it_o be_v so_o censure_v and_o often_o do_v a_o man_n more_o vain_o glory_n of_o the_o very_a contempt_n of_o vainglory_n and_o therefore_o now_o in_o truth_n the_o contempt_n of_o vainglory_n be_v not_o gloryed-of_a by_o he_o for_o he_o utter_o contemn_v it_o not_o so_o long_o as_o within_o himself_o he_o retein_v still_o some_o glory_v chap._n thirty-nine_o incur_v also_o from_o self-love_n and_o self-conceit_n without_o regard_n to_o praise_v from_o other_o there_o be_v yet_o within_o we_o another_o disease_n in_o the_o same_o kind_n of_o temptation_n namely_o a_o vanity_n in_o man_n of_o self_n love_v and_o pleaâ—â—ng_v themselves_o in_o themselves_o *_o whether_o it_o happen_v that_o they_o please_v or_o that_o they_o displease_v abroad_o and*_n wherein_o they_o affect_v not_o the_o please_a of_o other_o but_o these_o man_n whilst_o thus_o please_v themselves_o much_o do_v they_o displease_v thou_o not_o only_o in_o glory_v in_o some_o thing_n not_o good_a as_o in_o good_a but_o also_o in_o thy_o good_a thing_n as_o if_o in_o their_o own_o or_o also_o in_o glory_v in_o they_o as_o thou_o but_o as_o confer_v on_o they_o for_o some_o merit_n of_o their_o own_o or_o also_o as_o in_o thou_o without_o any_o their_o merit_v but_o yet_o not_o sociable_o joy_v in_o they_o but_o as_o envy_v the_o same_o grace_n of_o thou_o to_o other_o in_o all_o these_o and_o the_o like_a peril_n and_o travel_n thou_o see_v the_o fear_n and_o tremble_n of_o my_o heart_n and_o i_o rather_o perceive_v such_o wound_n to_o be_v by_o thou_o continual_o cure_v within_o i_o than_o not_o to_o be_v at_o all_o receive_v chap._n xl._n a_o recapitulation_n of_o the_o thing_n former_o speak_v in_o this_o book_n s._n augustine_n sometime_o extraordinary_a transportment_n in_o the_o contemplation_n and_o love_n of_o god_n o_o truth_n where_o have_v not_o thou_o walk_v along_o with_o i_o and_o be_v instruct_v i_o what_o i_o shall_v avoid_v and_o what_o affect_v when_o i_o recount_v unto_o thou_o my_o mental_a discovery_n such_o as_o i_o be_v able_a to_o make_v and_o consult_v thou_o concern_v they_o i_o surveigh_v the_o world_n abroad_o with_o the_o sense_n serve_v i_o for_o that_o purpose_n and_o after_o this_o i_o reflect_v *_o upon_o the_o vegetable_a life_n of_o my_o own_o body_n and_o *_o upon_o those_o my_o sense_n from_o hence_o i_o enter_v further_o into_o the_o inner_a chamber_n of_o my_o memory_n those_o manifold_a capacity_n fill_v with_o a_o innumerable_a store_n of_o wonderful_a thing_n i_o consider_v they_o and_o remain_v amaze_v at_o they_o and_o none_o of_o they_o can_v i_o discern_v without_o thou_o and_o yet_o i_o find_v none_o of_o they_o to_o be_v thou_o neither_o yet_o be_v it_o thou_o i_o the_o discoverer_n himself_o who_o travel_v over_o all_o these_o and_o endeavour_v to_o distinguish_v and_o value_v each_o one_o according_a to_o their_o several_a dignity_n *_o receive_n some_o from_o the_o message_n of_o my_o sense_n *_o question_v about_o other_o more_o intimate_a and_o not_o usher_v in_o by_o they_o whence_o they_o be_v and_z *_o number_n the_o several_a messenger_n whence_o i_o receive_v they_o and_o then_o after_o thus_o have_v display_v in_o my_o memory_n all_o its_o treasure_n *_o handle_n and_o examine_v some_o part_n *_o laying-up-again_a other_o examine_v and_o *_o drawing-out_a other_o to_o be_v peruse_v neither_o i_o say_v be_v i_o myself_o who_o wrought_v all_o this_o that_o be_v my_o faculty_n by_o which_o i_o wrought_v it_o neither_o be_v this_o thou_o my_o lord_n for_o thou_o be_v a_o light_n always_o permanent_a and_o immutable_a which_o light_n i_o still_o consult_v concern_v all_o these_o whether_o and_o what_o and_o of_o what_o worth_n they_o be_v and_o i_o listen_v unto_o its_o instruct_v i_o and_o command_v i_o and_o this_o i_o still_o continue_v to_o consult_v this_o be_v my_o great_a delight_n and_o so_o often_o as_o i_o can_v be_v release_v from_o other_o necessary_a affair_n i_o repair_v to_o this_o pleasure_n neither_o find_v i_o in_o all_o these_o thing_n which_o i_o run_v through_o and_o wherein_o i_o consult_v thou_o any_o place_n of_o settlement_n for_o my_o soul_n save_v only_o in_o thou_o whither_o all_o my_o dissipation_n final_o may_v be_v recollect_v and_o from_o whence_o nothing_o of_o i_o may_v eyer_n again_o be_v stray_v and_o sometime_o thou_o do_v admit_v i_o *_o into_o a_o affection_n very_o unusual_a within_o the_o
innermost_a part_n of_o my_o soul_n and_o *_o to_n i_o know_v not_o what_o sweetness_n which_o be_v it_o once_o perfect_v in_o i_o i_o know_v not_o what_o bliss_n that_o be_v which_o such_o a_o life_n will_v not_o enjoy_v but_o then_o with_o certain_a cumbersome_a weight_n hang_v upon_o i_o i_o present_o be_o press_v down_o again_o to_o these_o thing_n below_o and_o be_o re-ingulfed_n and_o detain_v by_o former_a custom_n and_o much_o i_o bewail_v myself_o and_o yet_o much_o still_o i_o be_o detain_v so_o great_o have_v the_o burden_n of_o a_o bad_a custom_n overload_v i_o and_o in_o this_o estate_n i_o can_v abide_v still_o but_o will_v not_o and_o in_o the_o other_o i_o will_v willing_o abide_v but_o can_v both_o way_n very_o miserable_a chap._n xli_o and_o in_o this_o condition_n i_o proceed_v to_o consider_v the_o remain_a languor_n of_o my_o sin_n in_o a_o threefold_a concupiscence_n and_o have_v invoke_v the_o help_n of_o thy_o right_a hand_n to_o deliver_v i_o for_o i_o behold_v thy_o brightness_n with_o a_o sick_a and_o wound_a spirit_n and_o beat_v back_o and_o dazzle_v by_o it_o i_o say_v who_o can_v ever_o attain_v thither_o i_o be_o utter_o cast_v away_o from_o the_o sight_n of_o thy_o eye_n thou_o be_v the_o truth_n who_o preside_v above_o all_o thing_n and_o i_o out_o of_o my_o covetousness_n be_v not_o willing_a to_o loose_v thou_o but_o yet_o greedy_o desire_v also_o to_o possess_v what_o be_v a_o lie_n together_o with_o thou_o as_o no_o man_n desire_v so_o to_o speak_v lie_n as_o to_o be_v ignorant_a what_o be_v truth_n and_o therefore_o i_o lose_v thou_o because_o thou_o vouchsafe_v not_o to_o be_v enjoy_v together_o with_o a_o lie_n chap._n xlii_o his_o recourse_n for_o a_o remedy_n to_o all_o these_o his_o malady_n not_o *_o to_o evil_a angel_n or_o demon_n with_o the_o platonist_n or_o other_o practise_v evil_a art_n as_o mediator_n between_o god_n and_o man_n because_o sinner_n like_o man_n spirit_n like_o god_n and_o now_o who_o can_v i_o find_v who_o may_v reconcile_v and_o reduce_v i_o unto_o thou_o be_v that_o office_n to_o be_v undertake_v by_o some_o angel_n for_o i_o upon_o what_o devotion_n upon_o what_o sacrament_n perform_v unto_o he_o many_o endeavour_v to_o return_v unto_o thou_o and_o of_o themselves_o unable_a as_o i_o hear_v have_v attempt_v such_o way_n and_o fall_v into_o the_o desire_n of_o curious_a vision_n and_o so_o deserve_v to_o be_v expose_v to_o many_o delusion_n for_o be_v high-minded_a they_o seek_v thou_o with_o the_o pride_n of_o learning_n exalt_v rather_o than_o beat_v their_o swell_a breast_n and_o so_o have_v allure_v unto_o rhem_n from_o the_o likeness_n of_o their_o affection_n spirit_n associate_v with_o they_o in_o pride_n 2._o eph._n 2_o 2._o the_o power_n of_o this_o air_n by_o who_o through_o magical_a operation_n they_o may_v be_v deceive_v whilst_o they_o be_v seek_v a_o mediator_n by_o who_o they_o may_v be_v purge_v but_o it_o be_v none_o such_o they_o light_v on_o 14_o 2_o cor._n 11_o 14_o but_o the_o devil_n it_o be_v transform_v himself_o as_o a_o angel_n of_o light_n and_o this_o much_o allure_v proud_a flesh_n to_o repair_v unto_o he_o because_o he_o have_v no_o body_n of_o flesh_n for_o they_o be_v mortal_n and_o sinner_n and_o thou_o o_o lord_n with_o who_o they_o seek_v reconciliation_n be_v sinless_a and_o immmortal_a now_o the_o mediate_a person_n between_o god_n and_o man_n it_o be_v meet_v he_o shall_v have_v something_o like_a to_o god_n something_o like_o to_o man_n lest_z in_o both_o like_a to_o man_n he_o shall_v be_v at_o too_o great_a a_o distance_n from_o god_n or_o in_o both_o like_a to_o god_n he_o shall_v stand_v too_o remote_a from_o man_n therefore_o also_o this_o counterfeit_a mediator_n by_o who_o according_a to_o thy_o secret_a judgement_n our_o pride_n deserve_v to_o be_v delude_v have_v one_o thing_n common_a with_o man_n that_o be_v sin_n and_o will_v seem_v to_o have_v the_o other_o thing_n common_a with_o god_n whilst_o not_o clothe_v with_o the_o mortality_n of_o flesh_n he_o vaunt_v himself_o as_o immortal_a 6.23_o rom._n 6.23_o but_o since_o the_o certain_a wage_n of_o sin_n be_v death_n and_o this_o sin_n he_o have_v common_a with_o man_n he_o have_v also_o that_o common_a with_o man_n to_o be_v sentence_v unto_o death_n chap._n xliii_o but_o *_o to_o christ_n who_o be_v the_o only_a true_a mediator_n mortal_a like_o man_n righteous_a like_o god_n through_o who_o else_o desperate_a he_o confident_o hope_v a_o perfect_a cure_n of_o all_o his_o disease_n but_o the_o true_a mediator_n who_o in_o thy_o secret_a mercy_n thou_o have_v manifest_v to_o the_o humble_a and_o haste_v also_o send_v he_o among_o they_o 2.5_o 1._o tim._n 2.5_o that_o they_o may_v by_o his_o example_n learn_v humility_n that_o mediator_n of_o god_n and_o man_n the_o man_n christ_n jesus_n between_o these_o mortal_a sinner_n and_o the_o immortal_a righteous_a one_o have_v appear_v mortal_a together_o with_o man_n righteous_a together_o with_o god_n that_o because_o the_o wage_n of_o righteousness_n be_v life_n and_o peace_n he_o by_o his_o righteousness_n which_o be_v ally_v to_o god_n may_v evacuate_v death_n to_o justify_v sinner_n which_o death_n he_o be_v please_v to_o have_v common_a with_o man_n and_o this_o true_a mediator_n be_v also_o make_v know_v to_o the_o saint_n of_o old_a that_o they_o by_o the_o faith_n of_o his_o passion_n to_o come_v as_o we_o by_o the_o faith_n of_o it_o past_a may_v attain_v salvation_n and_o it_o be_v as_o he_o be_v man_n that_o he_o be_v mediator_n but_o as_o he_o be_v the_o word_n so_o he_o be_v no_o middling_a person_n because_o equal_a to_o god_n and_o god_n with_o god_n and_o 1.1_o phil._n 2.6_o joh._n 1.1_o together_o with_o the_o holy_a spirit_n one_o god_n how_o far_o have_v thou_o love_v we_o o_o thou_o good_a father_n who_o sparedst_v not_o thy_o only_a son_n but_o deliver_v he_o up_o for_o we_o ungodly_a how_o far_o have_v thou_o love_v we_o for_o who_o he_o 8._o rom._n 8.52_o phil._n 2.6_o 8._o who_o think_v it_o no_o robbery_n to_o be_v equal_a to_o thou_o be_v make_v subject_a even_o to_o death_n even_o to_o the_o death_n of_o the_o cross_n only_o he_o free_a among_o the_o dead_a have_v power_n to_o lay_v down_o his_o life_n 10.18_o john_n 10.18_o and_o power_n likewise_o to_o take_v it_o up_o again_o become_v unto_o thou_o for_o we_o both_o a_o victor_n and_o a_o victim_n and_o therefore_o a_o victor_n because_o he_o have_v be_v a_o victim_n become_v unto_o thou_o for_o we_o both_o the_o priest_n and_o the_o sacrifice_n and_o therefore_o the_o priest_n because_o a_o sacrifice_n make_v we_o unto_o thou_o of_o servant_n son_n by_o be_v bear_v thy_o son_n and_o become_v our_o servant_n and_o therefore_o do_v i_o just_o repose_v strong_a hope_n in_o he_o that_o thou_o will_v heal_v all_o my_o disease_n by_o he_o who_o sit_v at_o thy_o right_a hand_n and_o intercede_v unto_o thou_o for_o we_o else_o shall_v i_o despair_v for_o many_o and_o great_a be_v these_o my_o disease_n many_o and_o great_a they_o be_v but_o great_a be_v the_o cure_n which_o thou_o have_v provide_v and_o well_o may_v we_o have_v imagine_v thy_o word_n to_o have_v be_v too_o remote_a from_o have_v any_o alliance_n with_o we_o and_o so_o have_v despair_v of_o ourselves_o have_v it_o not_o thus_o be_v make_v flesh_n and_o dwell_v among_o we_o affright_v with_o these_o my_o sin_n and_o with_o the_o load_n of_o my_o misery_n i_o have_v once_o a_o thought_n and_o a_o design_n of_o retire_v myself_o into_o some_o desert_n solitude_n but_o thou_o do_v prohibit_v it_o unto_o i_o and_o confirm_v i_o say_v that_o therefore_o christ_n die_v for_o all_o 5.15_o 2_o cor._n 5.15_o that_o they_o who_o live_v shall_v not_o henceforth_o live_v unto_o themselves_o but_o unto_o he_o who_o die_v for_o they_o behold_v o_o lord_n i_o cast_v all_o my_o care_n upon_o thou_o let_v i_o live_v and_o i_o will_v consider_v the_o wonderful_a thing_n of_o thy_o law_n 119.18_o psal_n 119.18_o thou_o know_v my_o ignorance_n my_o infirmity_n teach_v i_o heal_n i_o he_o thy_o only_a one_o in_o who_o be_v hide_v all_o the_o treasure_n of_o wisdom_n and_o knowledge_n redeem_v i_o with_o his_o own_o blood_n let_v not_o the_o proud_a my_o spiritual_a enemy_n false_o accuse_v i_o for_o i_o meditate_v on_o this_o my_o ransom_n 2.3_o col._n 2.3_o and_o i_o eat_v it_o and_o drink_v it_o and_o communicate_v it_o to_o other_o and_o be_v poor_a i_o desire_v to_o be_v satisfy_v therewith_o among_o those_o who_o eat_v and_o be_v satisfy_v and_o they_o shall_v praise_v the_o lord_n that_o seek_v he_o chap._n xliv_o the_o end_n and_o purpose_n of_o these_o his_o confession_n o_o lord_n since_o thou_o be_v eternal_o be_v thou_o ignorant_a o_o these_o thing_n i_o now_o say_v unto_o thou_o or_o see_v thou_o no_o till_o a_o certain_a time_n what_o be_v do_v in_o time_n why_o then_o have_v i_o order_v a_o narration_n of_o so_o many_o several_a matter_n unto_o thou_o sure_o not_o that_o thou_o shall_v learn_v such_o thing_n from_o i_o but_o only_o that_o i_o may_v the_o more_o excite_v my_o affection_n and_o love_n towards_o thou_o and_o they_o also_o who_o reaâ—_n these_o thing_n that_o we_o may_v all_o say_v together_o magnus_fw-la dominus_fw-la &_o lauâ—abilis_fw-la valde_fw-la great_a be_v the_o lord_n and_o great_o to_o be_v praise_v i_o have_v already_o say_v it_o and_o let_v i_o say_v it_o again_o out_o of_o my_o love_n of_o thy_o love_n to_o i_o it_o be_v that_o i_o do_v this_o as_o also_o we_o continue_v to_o pray_v nevertheless_o that_o the_o truth_n have_v say_v your_o heavenly_a father_n know_v what_o thing_n that_o have_v need_n of_o before_o you_o ask_v he_o 6.8_o mat._n 6.8_o we_o only_o publish_v the_o affection_n we_o have_v towards_o thou_o while_o we_o confess_v to_o theâ—_n our_o misery_n and_o thy_o mercy_n that_o thou_o may_v complete_v our_o freedom_n as_o thou_o have_v already_o begin_v it_o and_o that_o a_o length_n we_o may_v perfect_o cease_v to_o be_v miserable_a in_o ourselves_o and_o may_v arrive_v to_o beatitude_n in_o thou_o because_o thoâ—_n have_v gracious_o call_v we_o that_o we_o shall_v be_v poor_a in_o spirit_n and_o meek_a and_o mournful_a and_o hungry_a and_o thirsty_a after_o righteousness_n and_o merciful_a and_o pure_a in_o heart_n and_o peace_n maker_n see_v i_o have_v rehearse_v before_o thou_o a_o many_o thing_n such_o as_o i_o have_v ability_n and_o such_o as_o i_o have_v also_o a_o will_n to_o relate_v because_o thou_o first_o have_v so_o will_v that_o i_o shall_v confess_v unto_o thou_o 118.1_o psal_n 118.1_o the_o lord_n my_o god_n because_o that_o thou_o arâ—_n good_a and_o thy_o mercy_n endure_v for_o ever_o finis_fw-la