Selected quad for the lemma: son_n

Word A	Word B	Word C	Word D	Occurrence	Frequency Band	MI	MI Band	Prominent
son_n	father_n	mother_n	sister_n	15,172	5	9.8017	5	false

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ID	Title	Author	Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication)	STC	Words	Pages
A47513	A new family-book, or, The true interest of families being directions to parents and children, and to those who are instead of parents : shewing them their several duties, and how they may be happy in one another : together with several prayers for families and children, and graces before and after meat : to which is annexed a discourse about the right way of improving our time / by James Kirkwood ... ; with a preface, by Dr. Horneck.	Kirkwood, James, 1650?-1709.; Horneck, Anthony, 1641-1697.	1693 (1693)	Wing K647; ESTC R15399	107,616	291

he avoided doing or saying any thing that tended to make his Son uneasie The young Man finding himself at Liberty through his Father's Indulgence to live as he thought good gave up himself to all manner of Folly particularly to Drunkenness Notwithstanding this his Father still continued to be as fond as ever and would not do any thing to restrain him from doing what he had a mind to The consequence whereof was very dreadful and terrible for a little time after this wretched Son coming home very drunk killed his Father as also his Mother then big with Child he attempted to have Ravished his Sisters of whom two were Mortally Wounded by him Such sad Examples as these ought to awaken Parents to do what they can to Educate their Children in the Fear of God to train them up in the Study and Practice of true Piety and to restrain them by all due means from Sin and Folly Which things if they fail to do they may expect sooner or later to reap the Bitter and Cursed Fruits of so sad a Neglect Advice to Parents PART II. The Duties of Parents as to their Childrens Bodies HAving treated of the Duty of Parents towards their Children as to their Souls the better part I shall next shew what their Duties are as to the Bodies of their Children First It belongs to the Mother to give suck to her Children unless some bodily Imperfection great Weakness or Sickness or her circumstances in the World make it impossible or very dangerous and inconvenient both for her and the Children or for either For this end it is that God hath given Breasts unto Women and caused the Milk to flow into them that there may be nourishment suitable to the tender Infants in a readiness for them Neither can we suppose any other body capable of shewing equal Care and Love to the Children with that which it is natural for the Mother to express to the Fruit of her own Womb. Besides this it cannot well be imagined that the Milk of any other Body can be so fit for the Child as its own Mothers if she be but in tollerable Health We see that Sarah did not think that the greatness of her Quality or her great Age did excuse her from this Natural Obligation of giving Suck unto her Child Gen. 21. 7. And she said who would have said unto Abraham that Sarah should have given Children Suck For I have born him a Son in my Old Age. Which words suppose it to be the unquestionable Duty as well as common Practice of Mothers to give Suck to their Children When God chose a Nurse for Moses Exod. 2. 8. he led the Handmaid of Pharaoh's Daughter to the Child's Mother We find that amongst other Characters of a Woman that was fit to be taken into the number of Widows there was this If she hath brought up Children 1 Tim. 5. 10. or as the words may be Translated If she has nourished or fed her Children It was reckoned as a sign of God's Wrath Hos. 9. 14. To have dry Breasts And therefore they cannot be accounted Innocent who without apparent Necessity dry up their Breasts and so deprive their Children of that Food and Nourishment which Nature designed for them The words of the Psalmist David Psal. 22. 9. do not only imply that his Mother gave him Suck but they also shew that it was the practice of all Mothers to do the like to their Children Thou didst make me hope saith he when I was upon my Mother's Breasts Solomon likewise takes it for granted that Children of the same Womb should Suck of the same Breasts Cant. 8. 1. O that thou wert as my Brother that Sucked the Breasts of my Mother To all which might be added the words of the Woman to our Saviour Luke 11. 27. Blessed is the Womb that bare thee and the Paps which thou hast Sucked Which words suppose that she who bare him did also give him Suck We find that amongst the very Heathens they were accounted but half Mothers who neglected to give Suck to their Children One of their Ancient Authors speaking on this Subject saith How unnatural a thing is this how imperfect and only to be a Mother by halves having brought forth a Child presently to throw it away having nourished in her Womb somewhat that she could not see not now to nourish it with her Milk when she sees it alive and calling for her Assistance We see likewise that Nature hath impressed on the most Savage and wild Creatures a readiness to draw out their Breasts to their young Lam. 4. 3. Even the Sea Monsters draw out the Breast they give Suck to their young ones And shall Women degenerate into such unnatural Barbarity towards their young as is not to be met with amongst the most Savage Creatures Shall they whose Love and Tenderness has been so noted and admired prove unkind and cruel to the fruit of their own Womb 2 dly When Children are fit for stronger Food Parents are not to indulge them too much in gratifying the curiosity and daintiness of their Palate which not only is apt to make them too soft and tender but likewise disposeth them to Gluttony and Sensuality to make their Belly their God It is fit to accustom them to a plain and simple Diet which is generally more wholsome than that sort of Food which is very artificially prepared The State of all Humane Things is very uncertain they who have at present all manner of things in greatest plenty and variety may meet with changes and vicissitudes It 's therefore a part of the Wisdom of Parents to accustom their Children so far as their Health and Strength can bear it to eat any sort of Food that so if God sees fit to change their outward condition and circumstances they may be the more fit and able to endure such an alteration Thirdly As to the● Habit and Apparel Parents ought to cloath● them decently but not gorgeously Fineries and Gayeties 〈◊〉 Apparel are apt to make People especially younger Persons vain 〈◊〉 conceited to value themselves upo● their gay Cloathing It is fit ofte● to suggest to them that their Cloath● and Apparel are but borrowed Feathers and therefore that it is a grea● Folly to be proud of that which is 〈◊〉 their own but which they owe to th● Sheep or Goats to the Worms 〈◊〉 Bowels of the Earth It is not fit for Parents to make too great distinction among their Children as to their Apparel because this is apt to cause discontent● and Jealousies Hatred and Envy Contentions and Quarrellings among●● them Joseph's Coat of many colours which his old Father Jacob gave him caused his Brethren to hate and en●● him and at last to conspire most wickedly against him Gen. 37. 3 4 c. The same is to be said as to their Diet and other things wherein it is no small part of the Wisdom of Parents not to shew too much

which Words it appears That all who believe not only Jews or Persons Circumcised but Gentiles also or Persons uncircumcised are accounted the Children of Abraham and capable to partake of that Happiness and Salvation which was Promised to him as the Father of the Faithful To the same purpose saith the Apostle writing to the Galatians Chap. 3. 9. They which be of Faith are blessed with Faithful Abraham And v. 29. If ye be Christ's then are ye Abraham 's Seed and Heirs according to the Promise Again 1 Cor. 7. 14. he saith The unbelieving Husband is Sanctified by the Wife and the unbelieving Wife is Sanctified by the Husband Else were your Children unclean but now are they Holy Which intimates that the Children of all Believers whether they be Jews or Gentiles are within God's Covenant and have a Right to those Favours and Priviledges which he hath annexed thereto Likewise Acts 2. 39. 't is said The Promise is unto you and to your Children and to all that are afar off even as many as the Lord our God shall call So that all who are called by the Preaching of the Gospel and do believe in the Lord Jesus are both themselves and their Children within the Covenant of Grace If it were not so Then the Blessing of Abraham were not come on the Gentiles through Jesus Christ as it affirmed Gal. 3. 14. For how could the same Blessing be come on the Gentiles if their Children were not comprehended within the Covenant of Grace which was a part of the Blessing of Abraham And how could Christians be Heirs according to the Promise if their Children have no Right to it as Abraham's Children had Or can it be imagined that the Condition of Believers under the Gospel is worse than the Condition of those who believed under the Law Are God's Mercies and Favours to Mankind impaired by Christ's coming into the World Has the great Lover of Souls the Redeemer of the World been the occasion of our loseing great and considerable Priviledges by his Tabernacling amongst us And yet all this must needs follow if now under the Gospel the Children of Believers are excluded from the Covenant of Grace which they were admitted to under the Law which is very inconsistent with the Divine Goodness and contrary to the Love of our Lord Jesus which he manifested in his Blessed Gospel where we find he Commanded the Children to be brought unto him and blamed those who would have kept them from him He took them into his Arms laid his Hands upon them and Blessed them and declared that he accounted them Heirs of the Kingdom of Heaven Mat. 19. 13 14 15. and Mark 10. 13 14 15. 16. From all which both Words and Deeds of our Saviour we may see very plainly he was far from hindering their being admitted Members of his Church and Kingdom The Right of Infants to Baptism will further appear if you consider more particularly the Institution of Baptism The Jews were wont to admit into their Church not only Aged Persons who were converted to Paganism but likewise their Children which they did by Circumcision Sacrifice and Baptism Our Saviour being to determine the manner of admitting Disciples and Proselytes into his Church that he might make his Yoke easie to those who would come after him laid aside Circumcision which was a painful Rite and Sacrifices which were very Costly and only retained Baptism to be the Sacrament of Initiation or Admission of Disciples into his Church Go ye said he to his Apostles Mat. 28. 19. and teach or as the Words may be Translated Disciple or make Disciples of all Nations Baptizing them in the Name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Ghost Now this Command being given to Men who knew that the Infants of those who were Converted were admitted into the Jewish Church as well as the Parents themselves is there the least Ground to imagine any other but that our Saviour's Design was that the Children of Believers should still be admitted into his Church as well as formerly into the Jewish And no doubt if he had thought fit to discontinue the Jewish Practice he would have expresly signified his Mind about it to prevent an otherwise unavoidable mistake To all which might be added that the Catholick or Universal Church not only at this Day but in former Ages has observed this Custom of Baptizing the Children of Christian Parents Now if Children have so good a Right to Baptism what shall be said of those Parents who ●light and neglect it and so deprive their poor Children of that which God their Heavenly Father hath ordained for so great and excellent purposes We see how careful Parents are if their Children have a Title to Houses and Lands or other Temporal Things to use their utmost Endeavours to make their Title as sure unto them as is possible And yet how sad is it to think that they are not at all careful to have their Children Baptized tho' God has appointed this Sacrament to be the Seal of his Covenant and an Evidence of that Right which Believers and their Children have to the Kingdom of Heaven 2. Duty to feason their Minds betimes with good Impressions Secondly When Children begin to speak and to discover some dawnings of Reason it is fit to season their Minds with some good Thoughts with some divine Impressions that Religion betimes may catch hold of their tender and innocent Minds before they are corrupted and defiled with bad Principles and vain and unreasonable Opinions which they are apt to learn too soon from evil Company Teach them who made them who dyed for them for what end they were made whither good Children go when they dye and whither naughty Children go what a place Heaven is and Hell c. Amongst other Things 't will be very useful to tell Children some of the most remarkable Histories in Scripture as so many Arguments and Motives to excite them to be good Children and to avoid all wicked and naughty Courses For Example tell them the Story of the Deluge how God punished the Old World because they were wicked but saved Noah Thereby take occasion to shew them the Danger of being wicked that sinning with Company will not preserve from Punishment what a Happy thing it is to be good and how kind the Lord is to such who keep his Commandments as Noah did To this purpose tell them also the Story of Sodom and Gomorrah c. How those Cities were consumed by Fire from Heaven for their great Wickedness and how Lot was preserved from that dreadful Destruction Tell them the History of David and Goliah that they may learn not to be proud of their Strength but may put their Trust in God who is able to save them from their mightiest Enemies Tell them the Story of the naughty Children at Bethel how they mocked the Old Prophet Elijah and how 42 of them were torn in pieces by two Bears

perform these things Consider first it is the Will of God that you bring up your Children in his Fear and acquaint them with his Holy Laws and Commandments He who made you requires you to do this he who preserves you and keeps you alive he who is your King and Lord who has a right to your service to all that you are able to do who is your Father in Heaven who daily takes care of you and Loads you with his benefits who is the God of your Salvation who hath sent his Son into the World to die for you It is even he who saith Deut. 6. 6 7. And these words which I command thee this day shall be in thine Heart And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy Children and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house and when thou walkest by the way and when thou liest down and when thou risest up And Eph. 6. 4. And ye Fathers provoke not your Children to Wrath but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. 'T is He who Established a Testimony in Jacob and appointed a Law in Israel Which he Commanded our Fathers that they should make them known to their Children That the Generation to come might know them even the Children that should be born Who should arise and declare them to their Children That they might set their hope in God and not forget the Works of God but keep his Commandments And might not be as their Fathers a stubborn and Rebellious Generation a Generation that set not their heart aright and whose Spirit was not stedfast with God Psal. 78. 5 6 7 8. If you then be the Subjects the Servants and the Children of the great God If you love and fear Him as you ought to do you will be sure to make it your Business to train up your Children in true Virtue and Piety to make them what God requires them to be holy as he who hath called them is holy in all manner of Conversation you will excite them to strive to enter in at the strait gate To work out their Salvation with fear and trembling To remember their Creator in the days of their youth T● seek God while He may be found and to call upon Him while he is near To love the Lord with all their heart and the● Neighbours as themselves To endeavour to follow the Example of our Blessed Master to Learn of him to be meek and lowly to take up their Cross and to bear it patiently to be zealous for the Glory of God to abound in the work of the Lord not to be weary in well-doing but to grow in Grace and in the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. Secondly Is not this a work worthy of all your care and pains to save the Souls of those who are parts of your selves who derive their Being from you You are the Instruments not only of their being but the means of conveying unto them natural defilement and corruption And therefore you ought with a great deal of Zeal to endeavour to have their pollutions washed off by true unfeigned Repentance and a hearty turning from Sin unto God by their putting off the works of darkness and putting on the Armour of Light by their putting on the Lord Jesus Christ and walking as he walked Are you ready to do all that you can to make your Children Rich and Wealthy Great and Honourable in the World And yet are you at so little pains to do that for them which tends to make them rich in Faith and Heirs of a Glorious Inheritance You endeavour to acquaint them with those who may be useful to them in their worldly Affairs and Concerns And why do you not strive to acquaint them with God their greatest and best Friend who is sure to stand by them to take them up and to take care of them when all forsake them and turn their backs upon them Why do you not with greater earnestness endeavour to procure unto them his Friendship and Love who is infinitely Powerful and infinitely Good and Kind and therefore not only can but will do for them exceeding abundantly above all that either you or they can think or ask Thirdly The doing of this is attended with great Rewards not only in another World but even in this Life You cannot but find unspeakable Joy and Comfort when you behold your Children walking in the Fear of God going from Strength to Strength and from Grace to Grace that at last they may come and appear before the Lord in Sion It will free you from a great many anxious thoughts about them for the time to come when you know that they have God for their Friend who will be a Guide and Buckler to them What a great Satisfaction will it afford you to think that they for whom you make so great Provision and are at so much pains are Good and Wise and in all Probability will make good use of what is given them or designed for them When you see them humble of a mild and gentle Temper ap● to bear uneasie things Meekly and Patiently when you see them Sober and Temperate Charitable and Compassionate Just and Upright True and Faithful Wise and Prudent Devout and Religious Zealous for the Honour of God and studying daily to grow up in all Virtue and Piety how will this fill you with a Pleasure that cannot be expressed So true is it that is said by the Wise Man Prov. 15. and 20. A Wise Son maketh a Glad Father And Ch. 23. v. 24 25. The Father of the Righteous shall greatly rejoyce and he that begetteth a wise Child shall have Joy of him Thy Father and thy Mother shall be glad and she that bare thee shall rejoyce They who Plant an Orchard are mightily pleased to see the young Trees prosper grow regularly and bear a great deal of good Fruit this makes them reflect upon all their cost and pains with much satisfaction How much greater must their Pleasure be upon whom God hath bestowed Children when they see them growing in Grace as they grow in Years When they behold them straight and upright in their Lives pure and undefiled in the way walking in the Law of the Lord having Respect unto all his Commandments flourishing in the Courts of the Lord bringing forth the Fruits of Righteousness and true Holiness Doubtless there is no Pleasure in any Earthly thing comparable to this of Religious Parents when they are Happy in Pious and Virtuous Children And as such Children are a great Comfort and afford a Mighty Pleasur● to their Parents so they are a great Honour and a lasting Ornament unto them What can be more for th● Glory of Parents than to have thei● Children adorned with the Image o● God cloathed with Virtue and Goodness as with a Garment This doth reflect somewhat of its Lusture and Beauty upon the Parents themselves who have been under God the Instruments

It will direct them when their Neighbour or Friend is overtaken with a fault to restore him with the Spirit of Meekness It will make them not to seek their own things only but likewise their Neighbours good as well as their own It will not only restrain them from what is manifestly evil but will also make them careful to avoid every appearance of it to shun the very thoughts and desire of Wickedness It will cause them to be content with what God bestows upon them and not to envy others not to covet their Goods nor wrong them by word or deed And ●in a word the lively Impressions of Religion will make them careful to keep their Consciences Void of Offence both towards God and towards Men. Now if these Rules of our Holy Religion had their due Influence on the minds of People what a Blessed and Happy Society would there be in the World How easie would every Man be How well-pleased How safe and secure from hurt and danger How confident in his Friends Neighbours and Acquaintance Knowing and being well assured that they fear and love God and therefore will do no wrong As the Consideration of these things ought to make Parents very careful to do all that ever they can towards the right Education of their Children so i● ought mightily to excite all Christian Rulers and Governours to do their part in this matter particularly to take care that there be Schools every where and that such Persons be chosen to Educate Children at School as not only are skilful to teach them to Read Write c. But who may contribute likewise towards the seasoning their minds with Religious Principles who will look upon it as one great part of their Business to endeavour to possess them with the Fear and Love of God How worthy of Christian Magistrates were it also to take care that all Schools and Colleges be visited often by fit Persons that the Diligent may be encouraged and that the Remiss and Negligent or the Vicious and Prophane may be discouraged by all Just and Lawful means These things cannot be look'd upon as Forreign to the Magistrates Office if it be but duely considered how much Benefit comes to the State by the good Education of Children and how much mischief cometh thereto by the neglect of their Education Of old the Persians Lacedemonians Cretians and others thought it their Interest to see to the right Education of Children they did not think it safe to leave so great a Trust wholly in the hands of Parents who through Partiality Fondness or Indiscretion might utterly spoil them and thereby do unspeakable Mischief to the State And no doubt till once all Christian Rulers and Governours both in Church and State make it more their business to see to the right Education of Children there is no great hopes of ever seeing any considerable Reformation in the World Fifthly If you neglect to do these things for the Souls of your Children and leave them to themselves to do as they list then you may expect that their Sins and Follies their Pride and Passion their Gluttony and Drunkenness their Cursing and Swearing their Lying and Deceiving their Malice and Revenge their Chambering and Wantonness their Atheism and Irreligion will not only prove Tragical to them but occasion great uneasiness Vexation and Grief of Mind to you Prov. 10. 1. A foolish Son is a heaviness to his Mother and Chap. 17. 21. He that begetteth a Fool doth it to his Sorrow and the Father of a Fool hath no Joy 'T is true 't is not in the Power of Parents to infuse good Qualities into the minds of their Children some are so very perverse that all that can be said or done by Parents is altogether slighted and neglected by them We know that Abraham had an Ishmael as well as an Isaac and Isaac an Esau as well as a Jacob and Jacob a Reuben as well as a Joseph However such Parents who have the affliction of sad and wretched Children have some comfort and satisfaction in having done their Duty for them and in endeavouring to approve themselves unto God who will accept of their honest and sincere endeavours and will crown them with glorious Rewards But it is otherwise when Children prove bad through the too great Indulgence or the Negligence and bad Example of Parents What a deep wound must it needs give them when they begin to consider that they did not their part to make their Children good and were so far from it that they corrupted and ruined them by their bad Example and over great kindness and indulgence Such Parents do often eat the Fruits of their cruel fondness and feel the sad Effects of their own bad Example by means of their Prophane and Graceless Children As God doth often visit the Iniquity of the Parents upon the Children so when Children are suffered to go on in their foolish and wicked courses through the indiscreet gentleness and kindness of Parents who perhaps are in other respects good People the Lord doth sometimes punish such Parents and bring Temporal Judgments upon them Ely was a great instance of this 1 Sam. 2. and 22. He heard all that his Sons did unto all Israel which were things of a very vile Nature whereby as it 's said Chap. 3. and 13. they made themselves vile that is hateful to God and base and contemptible to all the People by their lewd and abominable Practices Ely did reprove them but it was too coldly and gently Chap. 2. 23 24 And he said unto them Why do you such things for I hear of your evil dealings by all this People Nay my Sons for it is no good Report that I hear you make the Lord's People to transgress Besides his reproof he ought to have restrained them Ch. 3. and 13. as being High Priest a Judge and Chief Governour amongst the People He ought to have put them out of the Priesthood as accurssed Persons and Executed the Laws of God against them Which because he did not therefore God denounced very dreadful Judgments against him by a Prophet whom he sent unto him Chap. 2. 31 3● 33 34 36. and Chap. 3. 13 14. And in Chap. 4. we find his two Sons Hoph●● and Phineas were slain in Battel by the Philistines and the Ark of God was taken upon the news whereof the Old Man fell from off his Seat backwards and his Neck brake and he died We see likewise in David what was the Effect of his too great indulgence to some of his Children especially Absalom and Adonijah who not only wrought their own destruction but proved great Crosses to their aged Father Here it will not be unfit to relate what St. Augustin tells us of the sad Effects of leaving a Child to himself and not endeavouring to Educate him aright The Story is this There was one Cyril a Citizen of Hippo who having one only Son was so fond of him that