thou sowest up mine iniquities Wicked men doe treasure up vengeance against the day of the Lord the profane person treasures up wrath and in the eighteenth verse he saith The mountaines falling come to nothing as if he had said good Lord who can beare all those sinnes that I have committed Are they all sealed up and shall all the judgements due unto them fall upon me heavier then the mountaines Good Lord what rock or mountaine can beare the weight of my sinnes thus sealed up setled and laid close to my heart And so God seales up an hundred thousand oathes in one bagge and an ocean of pride and mischiefes done to Gods people and Church are barrelled up in another and the Lord shall one day lay all these upon thy necke Who is able to beare all these sinnes Now it falles out with a sinner as it is with a banckrout debtor one man throwes him into prison and when he is there every one comes against him and so he shall never come out but die and rotte in the prison so though the Lord will not execute judgement on thee speedily yet in the end the Lord will be paid for all thy sins and when thou art in hell then mercy and justice and patience will cry all to heaven for justice and vengeance then happily a drunkard is cast into prison for his drunkennesse and for his blasphemy and then all his filthinesse comes in as so many bills of inditement against him Oh therefore labour to see sinne alive we play with sinne as if it were dead when children see the picture of a dead lyon upon a wall they labour to pull him in pieces but if there were a live lyon in the place it would make the strongest to runne So thou paintest thy sinne and sayest it is thy infirmity God forgive your swearing the like and thus you dally with your sinnes but brethren labour to see sinne alive and to see sinne roaring upon you see the pawe of sinne and the condemnation that shall be throwne upon the soule by it and this will awake the soule in the apprehension of it Secondly we must see sinne convictingly that it may be so to us as it is in it selfe that looke what sinne is in it selfe we may so conceive of it in our soules being guilty of it and this discovers it selfe in these two particulars First when we have a particular apprehension in our owne person that looke what we confesse to be in sinne in generall we confesse the same in our owne soules and that our sinnes are as bad as the sinnes of any this is the cursed distemper of our hearts howsoever we hold it to be truth in generall yet when we come to our owne sinnes the case is altered and we never come to the right seeing of them as they concerne our owne particular As the adulterer can easily confesse the danger and filthynesse of that sinne in others but he thinkes not his sinne to be so vile as the Wise man saith He that enters into the house of an harlot doth he ever returne againe doth he ever take hold of the path of life The Lord is pleased to set such a heavy stamp on this sinfull distemperature These are truths and a man in his cold blood wil easily confesse it in the generall that he never returnes againe Take the words as they are in the letter of them and howsoever they have some other interpretations yet in the letter it is thus read he is euer hardly recovered Howsoever it may be yet with much difficulty David had let his soule loose in that he did hardly recover himselfe againe scarce one of a thousand yet ever tooke hold of the way of life And the drunkard will confesse the danger of his sinne in generall when he sees his drunken mates lie grovelling in the dust he will be ashamed of it and say Now no adulterer or drunkard shall ever come into the kingdome of heaven but here is the wound of it when he comes to his owne particular drunkennesse and uncleannesse that he must looke into them then the sight of a mans knowledge hath not so much power as to judge himselfe rightly or to make a particular application to himselfe but he thinkes his adultery and drunkennesse is not like to another mans or else his knowledge is but weake or else he seeth as a man in the twylight when the sun is downe and the heavens begin to withdraw their light though a man can see to read abroad yet he cānot see to read in the house or in the chamber So it is with a weake knowledge and with a feeble understanding in a wicked man he is notable to see the vile nature of sinne in himselfe when he comes to read his owne closet sinnes and his bosome abominations then he hath not so much light as to perceive them so fully in himself as he thought to doe therefore the rule is this Arest thy soule in a speciall maner of those sinnes whereof thou standest guilty that phrase in Iob is to good purpose thou lookest narrowly to my pathes thou settest a print upon the heels of my feet so God followed Iob to the hard heeles and did narrowly observe his waies so deale thou with thy owne soule and set a print upon the heele of thy heart arest thy heart in particular for thy sins and I would have you perceive your owne particular sinnes and follow them to your hearts and make huy and cry after your sinnes and dragge your hearts before the Lord and say Is murther pride drunkennesse and uncleannesse such horrible sinnes and doth God thus fearefully plague them Lord it was my heart that was proud and vaine it was my tongue that did speake filthily blasphemously my hand hath wrought wickednesse my eye was wanton and my heart was uncleane and filthy Lord here they are it is my affections that are disorderly and it is I that doe delight too much in the world Thus bring thy heart before the Lord you shall observe the same in David so long as Nathan spake of sinne in generall he conceived of it truly and confessed the vilenes of it and the heart of this good King did rage against the man saying It is the Sonne of death but as soone as the prophet had said Thou art the man though he never saw his sinne kindly before yet now his heart yeelded and he began to see himselfe and his sinne in the naturall colours of it So the Apostle Iohn saith Hee that hateth his brother is a man-slayer and you know no man-slayer hath eternall life abiding in him Then play thou the part of Nathan and say I am the man it is this wretched heart of mine that hath hated the Saints of God and therefore if I be a murtherer will not my sinne keepe me from the kingdome of heaven as well as another mans Yes that it will if pride
all these rebellions of my heart should be pardoned and all this loosenes and security should be cast behind the backe of the Lord I say it cannot be It is possible onely labour thou that it may be and that thou maiest not be puffed up with presumption consider these three Cautions in thy seeking The first caution is First consider in thy seeking a little mercy will not serve the turne thou that hast been an old weather-beaten sinner and hast wallowed in thy filthinesse when thou goest to God for grace consider it is not a little grace or a small worke that will doe the deed it is not a few spoonfulls or buckets-full that will cleanse a fouleskinne so if thou hast had a filthy prophan heart which hath been a through-fare to all wickednesse and thou hast thus given thy selfe liberty thereunto and hast continued therein there must be a well of mercy to purge such a miserable wretch as thou art When David had committed those two sins of adultery murther had continued in them long he was forced to beg for much mercy and to say purge me wash me cleanse me O Lord these staines are marvelous deepe therefore purge me with hisope nay he had never done with it because his sinnes were more then ordinary So it will cost a great deale of worke before a loose prophane drunkard can be made cleane Secondly thou must expect it with much difficulty and hardnesse in thy selfe thou that hast beene rivetted in thy base luâ—ts and corruptions the Lord will make all cracke before thou shalt finde mercy thou that hast out-braved heaven with thy prophanesse the Lord will make thee a mirrour of humiliation as heretofore thou hast beene a spectacle of filthinesse A man that hath had a bone long out of joynt it is now festred it will make him cry many an oh before it be brought into his right place againe So it is with a man whose heart is full of filthines it will cost him much paines and difficulty and heart-smart before the Lord will bring the soule to a right set againe Manasses humbled himselfe mightily before the Lord because he had bin a mighty proud rebellious man the Lord made his humiliation as miraculous as his sinnes had beene and so David when he had given his sinnes ease in bedding with them the Lord brake all his bones and did awaken him with a witnesse Lastly you must resolve to bestow the utmost of your endeavour to get this mercy at the hands of the Lord It is not a dipping of a foule cloth in water will cleanse it but it must be soaked and rinced in it so you must not thinke to have the foule staines of sinne washed away with a few teares No no you must rub your hearts over over and awake your consciences againe and againe it is not a little examination nor a little sorrow will serve the turne the Lord will pull downe those proud hearts of yours and it may be let you goe a begging for mercy all your dayes and well you may have it at your last gasp when all is done The maine point in hand is this It is for the first part of contrition for the sight of sinne This hearing is not barely the sound of a mans words but the sense and meaning of the words by which the mind is inlightned and he begins seriously to ponder the nature of his sinnes that were so layed open unto him thus hearing they came to be pierced The first doctrine is this There must be a true sight of sinne before the soule can be broken for the text saith They did first heare and then apprehend the evill that was done by them thus they were brought to a saving remorse for their sinnes Ezek 36.31 the text saith Then shall you remeÌ„ber your owne evill waies your doings that were not good and shall loath your selves for your abominations First they shall remeÌ„ber their works and then loath themselves it is the course that Ephraim takes in Ieremiah After that I was instructed I smote upon my thigh and after I was turned I repented I was ashamed and confounded because I did beare the reproach of my youth And it is Gods Course which he takes with his as in Iob. When the Lord had once gotten his people into fetters he shewed them their Wickednesse and makes their eares open to discipline And in another place the Prophet shewed the ground reason why the people repented not they understood not the grouÌ„d and reason of their sinne For no man saith What have I done As a horse rusheth into the battaile and feareth nothing so a wicked man continues in a sinfull course never considering what he hath done the drunkard doth not say How have I abused Gods creatures and the despiser of Gods ordinances doth not say How have I rejected the Lord Jesus Christ And therefore no wonder though he be not affected with that he doth Now for the better clearing of this doctrine I will handle these three things First I will shew what this true sight of sinne is Secondly I will shew the reason why there must be a true sight of sinne before the soule can be broken for it thirdly I will make use of the point First it is not every sight of sinne will serve the turne nor every apprehension of a mans vilenesse but it must have these two properties in it First he must see sinne clearely Secondly convictingly First he that will see sinne clearly must see it truly and fully be able to fadome the compasse of his corruptions and to dive into the depth of the wretchednesse of his vile heart otherwise it will befall a mans sinne as it doth the wound of a mans body when a man lookes into the wound overly and doth not search it to the bottome it begins to fester and rancle and so in the end he is slaine by it so it is with most sinners we carry all away with this We are sinners and such ordinary confessions but we never see the depth of the wound of sinne and so are slaine by our sinnes it is not a generall slight confused sight of sinne that will serve the turne it is not enough to say It is my infirmity and I cannot amend it and we are all sinners and so forth No this is the ground why we mistake our evils and reforme not our waies because we have a slight and an overly sight of sinne a man must prove his wayes as the goldsmith doth his gold in the fire a man must search narrowly and have much light to see what the vilenesse of his owne heart is and to see what his sinnes are that doe procure the wrath of God against him as the prophet David saith I considered my waies and turned my feet into thy testimonies the phrase in the originall is thus much I turned my sinnes upside
soule as it befell the drunkard that was asleepe on the toppe of the mast who feares no harme because he sees it not So it is with a sinfull heart he is resolved to goe on still in his sinne because he seeth not the danger take a man that hath his heart stabbed with a stilletto and the wound is so narrow that it cannot be searched there is no meanes to come to it Just so it is with a blind ignorant heart there is much meanes whereby good might be done to it but an ignorant heart barres all out so that nothing can doe good to the soule All counsels admonitions reproofes cannot prevaile all mercies allure not because they find no sweetnesse in them a Minister is as able to teach the stoole whereon he sits as to doe them good Me thinks it is with a world of men that live in the bosome of the Church as it is with such as have suffered shipwracke they are cast upon the waves and their friends are standing upon the shoare and see them and mourne for them there they see one sinking and another floating upon the waves even labouring for his life and they sigh and mourne but cannot helpe him Just so it is with ignorant people that are swallowed up with the floods of iniquitie here is one man going and there another in the broad way to destruction we pitty them and pray for them that God would open their eyes and give them the sight of their sinnes but alas they are not able to conceive of any thing We cannot come at them thus they sinke in their sinnes Our Saviour looking over Jerusalem said Oh that thou hadst knowne at least in this thy day the things that belong unto thy peace but now they are hidden from thine eyes As if he had said oh now they are sinking they will not be reformed nor reclaimed now they are going the way of all flesh and to hell too the way of peace is hidden from their eyes they refuse the meanes that may doe them good I might here condemne the Papists that say ignorance is the mother of devotion whereas it is the breeder of all wickednesse and the broad way to hell and everlasting destruction The use is this as you desire the comfort of your soules and to be prepared for mercy and to pertake of that rich grace that is in Christ as you desire to have the rich promises of the Gospell put over to you as ever you would have the Lord Jesus Christ a guest to your soules you are to be entreated to give your soules no content til you have your eyes so opeÌ„ed to see your sins that you may be convicted of them Now it may be some will say it is good that you say but what meanes must we use to come to this sight of sinne Answ. I answere to such poore soules give me leave to doe three things First I will shew some meanes how we may come to see sinne convictingly Secondly I will take away all the lets that may hinder a man from it Thirdly I will use some motives to stirre us up to use the meanes and set upon the service though it be somewhat harsh and tedious to our Corruptions The meanes are three First we must goe to God for knowledge the Lord knowes our hearts therefore we must goe to him that he would make us able to know them too the Church of Laodicea thought none like her selfe as it is the fashion of many in this age so to doe and therefore the Lord said thou thoughtst thy selfe rich and full and that thou didst want nothing It is an argument of a proud sinfull heart that he is alwaies wel conceited of himselfe and of his owne wit grace and sufficiency but marke what the Lord saith to this Church I counsell thee to buy of me eye-salve She thought all her compters to be good gold all her appearances to be good Religion but the Lord bids her buy of him eye-salve As if he had said you see not your sinnes and therefore goe to God and beseech him that dwels in endles light to let in some light into your soules When the poore blind man Bartimeus sate begging by the way saying O thou son of David have mercy upon me and pressed earnestly on our Saviour in so much that when his disciples rebuked him he cryed so much the more O thou sonne of David have mercy on me and when Christ said what wouldst thou have me to do for thee he answered Lord that I may receive my sight If he did so earnestly seeke for his bodily eyes much more should we for the eyes of our soules that we may see our sinnes A blind mind brings a wicked heart with it and laies a man open to all sinnes and therefore we ought to be more pinched for the want of this sight Object then of our bodily eyes and if the question be asked what wouldst thou have honour riches or the like Answ. Answere O Lord the sight of my sinnes I know sin is a vile loathsome thing O that I could see sinne convictingly and clearely Secondly labour to acquaint your selves throughly with God and with his law and to see the compasse and breadth of it the words of the commandements are few but there are many sins forbidden in them and many duties required therefore labour to see thy sinnes convicted and thy many duties neglected The Apostle Paul thought himselfe once alive without the Law and who but he in the world he was able to carry all before him he thought his peny good silver but when the Law came saith the text then sinne revived when God had opened my eyes to see my sinne and the corruptions of my heart then I saw my selfe a dead man yet Paul was a Pharisie and brought up at the feet of Gamaliel and one that did keepe the Law of God in a strict maner Whence we learn that a man may be an ignoraÌ„t man be his parts never so great for humane learning and the â—ame Apostle saith I had not knowne lust except the law of God had said thou shalt not lust by which is meant the tenth commandement which forbids the secret distemper of the heart though there is no delight and consent to it who but Paul and yet he knew it not and therefore no wonder though many otherwise well learned are ignorant in Gods Law therefore looke your selves in this glasse of the word all you that say how ever you are not able to talke so freely as others yet you have as good a heart to God as the best I tell you if you could but see the filthinesse of your hearts you would be out of love with your selves for ever An ignorant heart cannot but be a naughty heart Thirdly binde your hearts to the peace and good behaviour and be willingly content to take every truth that is revealed without quarrelling
that a Cretian which is a filthy beast by a sound reproose may come to bee a glorious Saint and whereas the Jewes had loaden the Lord with their sinnes therefore it was just with God to ease himselfe of his burden and so send them and their sinnes downe to hell together Thus a man would think but the Lord did not so as we may see in Esay I am he that blotteth out all thy transgressions for my owne name sake I will remember your sinnes no more and as the Apostle saith the Gentiles were full of all unrighteousnesse worse then they almost could be for all kind of degrees of sinne and yet many of them became full of all holinesse Such were some of you saith the Apostle and in another place we may see that a Scarlet sinner may become a Saint in nature we know this scarlet is such a deepe die that all the art under heaven cannot alter it Yet the Lord can make of a Scarlet sinner a milke white Saint I doe not say it will ever be and it doth alwaies come to passe but it is possible The reason is taken from the Lords Almighty goodnesse and power the Lord is able to supply all wants and amend that which is amisse nay he is able to do more then that thou standest in need of When the Lord made heaven earth he did not spend all his strength that he was able â—o help no more No no he is All-sufficient still he is not onely able to continue that good which the creature hath but to make a glorious supply of whatsoever is wanting as David saith He pardoneth all thy iniquities and forgiveth all thy sinnes not some but all otherwise he were not All-sufficient unlesse he had a salve for every sore and a medicine for every malady if our sinnes were more then God could pardon or if our weakenesses were more able to ouerthrow us then his strength to uphold us he were not All-sufficient Indeed there are some things which the scripture saith God cannot doe but it is not because of the want of power in God but because there is a weakenesse in the creature As God cannot deny himselfe but the more and greater our sinnes and wickednesse are the more will the strength and glory of his power appeare in pardoning of them and where sinne abounds there grace abounds much more in the pardoning of the same Christ is All-sufficient in power to procure mercy for all thy sinnes and the Spirit is all-sufficiently able to apply the satisfaction of Christ to thy soule and therefore be thy condition never so fearefull the sinne against the holy Ghost onely excepted there is power and mercy in the Lord to pardon thee and it is possible for thee to finde mercy The first use is for reproofe and it checks the desperate discouragement that harbours in the hearts of many poore sinners that if they finde no power in theÌ„selves no succour in the meanes they doe question in this case and presently conclude an impossibilitie to receive mercy and they thinke there is no hope of pardon as heretofore they have had no care in sinning because they cannot see how it may be they suppose it cannot be This bringeth a great indignity to the Lord Jesus Christ and a great discouragement to themselves why the Lord hath hardnesse and difficulties at command When the seige about Jerusalem was marvellous sore and every man did despaire of any comfort or succour the Prophet said before to morrow this time shall a measure of fine flower be sould for a shekle and then a Lord on whose hand the King leaned said If the Lord should make windowes in heaven how can this thing be and the Prophet said unto him thou shalt see it but not eat of it so it is with many that begge often and the Lord answereth not so that the soule is marvellously starved and the flood of iniquitie comes in amaine upon the soule and all his sinnes come to his view and the heart beginnes to reason in this manner If the depths of Gods mercies should be opened can all these sins be pardoned and can this damned soule of mine be saved Surely this cannot be It is just with God wee should seeke mercy given to others as bad as wee and yet wee not taste of it because wee distrust the Lord. Cains sin was so much the greater because hee said it could not be forgiven so it is a horrible sinne to say the Lord is not so mercifull as the Devill is malitious and that the world and a sinfull heart 〈…〉 able to damne me then God is to save me if 〈…〉 so God were no God and Christ no 〈…〉 and the Spirit no comforter this is a 〈…〉 sin our selves and the devill above God the Lord Jesus Christ. Oh therefore check all those discouragements of soule which too much prevaile with us Secondly it is a ground of great incouragement to provoke the hearts of all wicked men under heaven to looke out of that condition wherin they are for some mercy because the most wicked of the world may be wrought upon and the most prophane heart may be pierced Who therefore would not have his heart quickned up to seeke out for recovery from that estate wherein he is All you poore creatures if there be any here present as I doubt not but there are Oh you poore and ungodly sinfull creatures my soule pitties you you that have had your hands imbrewed in the blood of Christ and whose sinnes are written with a pen of Iron and are seene in every corner of the street you that are thus in the gall of bitternesse and yet in the kingdome of darkenesse though your case for the present be very desperate yet here is a little twigge in the middest of the maine sea whereupon you may lay hold And this may make you looke up the Lord may shew mercy unto you as proud as stubborne and rebellious as you have had mercy If you have the hearts of men looke for mercy though your estate be fearefull for the present yet it may be good God hath not set the scale of condemnation upon your sinnes he hath not yet sent you to hell Consider this whatsoever thou art thou yet livest upon the earth and enjoyest the meanes and it is possible yet to have all thy sinnes pardoned oh lay about thee goe home say Good Lord were they pierced in their hearts that pierced the Lord Iesus and were their soules wounded In conclusion then why may not my prophane sinfull heart be humbled and pierced It may be so if the Lord say Amen it will be thus that disease is not past remedy that hath beene cured in others therefore let this stay thy heart as bad as thou have been humbled and brought home and therefore why not thou But the soule will say Can all these abominations be removed and is it possible
inlightened and touched thou wilt be much contended and comforted as David said to Abigail when shee came to disswade him from going against Nabal to destroy him she said Vpon me my Lord be this iniquitie why Blessed be God saith David that sent thee this day to meet me and blessed be thy counsell which hath kept me this day from comming to shed blood and avenging my selfe So if thou hast a good heart thou wilt not goe away repyning and fretting at the word and say the minister meant me crosseth me Take heed of this tempter of heart and if God bee pleased to carve out to any man those particular fruits that concerne his good goe away and blesse the Lord say blessed be his good word and his poore servant that met this day with my sins I never observed that pride I never observed that malice I never discovered that carelesse what became of Christ I cared not what became of his ministers I respected not what became of his name I regarded not but the Lord hath shewed me my sinnes and blessed be God for that good worke which hath beene communicated to my soule by his servant And observe this so farre as the heart is fearfull that the minister should meet with his sins so farre the heart is naught Nay if it be thus if your consciences testifie against you that you are loath to have your sinnes dealt roundly withall you thinke the ministers should be mild and not use such bitter reprehensions and sharpe reproofes I beseech you thinke of it seriously you deale with your sinnes in this kind as David did with Absalon when Ioab was to goe out he gives him charge to use him kindly and gently that is doe not kill him but take him prisoner that was his speech deale kindly for my sake with the young man Absalon Dost thou deale so with thy sinnes thou wouldest have the minister deal kindly with drunkennesse and adultery and malice do not kill drunkennesse but only take him prisoner keep him in reforme the outward face of drunkennesse that we may not be drunken in the open streets but in a corner and so that men may not sweare at every turne but when they come among gentlemen that they doe it cunningly The case is cleare thy soule if it be of this temper it never hated sinne it never sorrowed for sinne it never found the word of God working upon it for the subduing of sinne Imagine there were a traytor or rebell come into the towne that sought to take away the Kings life nay suppose he were thy enemy or the like will any one say that man hates an enemy that cannot endure to have an enemy discovered attached and brought to execution No sure but he loves him he covers him he hides him and would not have him knowne he is a lover of a traitor and a traitor himselfe else why doe you harbour a traitor you cover him that he cannot come to judgment and therefore you are a friend unto him so it is in this case Canst thou say that thou hatest sinne thou hatest malice and covetousnesse and loosenesse and prophanesse and in the meane time thy soule saith I cannot endure that the minister should discover these I cannot endure that he should attach them and arrest my soule for my covetousnesse and adultery and the like My heart riseth and I would cover it and hide it nay I can beare it out sometimes and say the traytor is not here I am not the drunkard I am not the adulterer you talke of but if the minister will pursue thy soule then thou shuttest the doore against him If it be thus with thee I tell thee thou art a friend to the traytor thou never hatedst thy sinne thou wert never yet brought to a true sight or sorrow for it Wee will now proceed When they heard this saith the text the word in the originall caryeth a continual act when they had heard there was not an end but the sting of the word did still stick in their hearts When they walked on the way that sounded in their eares I have crucified the Lord of life and when they lay downe that came into their mindes I have shed the blood of the Lord and when they arose this was their first thought I have consented thereunto and imbrewed my hands therein this stucke upon the spirits of thē and the sting of the truth would not away but after they had heard it it remained still in their hearts The doctrine is this that serious meditation of our sinnes by the word of God is a speciall meanes to breake our hearts for our sinnes After they had heard this notes a continuall action the truth of God still stuck in their stomackes the arrowes of God would not out the Apostle shot some secret shot into their soules which came home to their hearts and consciences when they heard this that is the musing and meditating and pondering of this when they could hold no longer they could beare no more but came to the Apostles and said what shall we doe Sometimes God brings a man into the Church to carpe at the minister and to see what he may have against him now if the Lord sting the conscience of that man he will heare you all the weeke after and say me thinkes I see the man still he aymed at me he intended me and me thinkes I heare the word still sounding in mine eares he is alwaies meditating on the word in this kind And a serious meditation of sinne discovered by the word is a special meanes to pierce the soule for the same this is the power of meditatiō whē David had considered the glory of wicked men how their eyes started out with fatnes and they had more then heart could wish and who but they in the world they were not troubled they were not molested then he thought they were the only men in the world when he had considered and mused of this it pierced his soule and he was vexed with it this went to the very intrailes of him and therefore that place is marvelous pregnant It was the meanes whereby Lot was so touched with the abominations of Sodome that righteous man dwelling among them in seeing hearing vexed his righteous soule from day to day with their unlawfull deeds Many saw and heard besides Lot and yet were not vexed but he vexed himselfe that is the meditation of those evils bringing them home to his soule vexed him and troubled him and the word is a fine word implying two things first the search and examination of a thing Secondly the racking and vexing a man upon the triall So it was with Lot he observed all the evils he weighed them and pondered them and then he racked his soule and vexed himselfe with the consideration of them the same word that is used here for vexing is used in the matter of a storme
your joviall company and ryoting persons there is nothing under heaven that takes off the minde more from musing and the understanding from waighing a mans evill throughly therefore this must needs be a marvelous impediment and hinderance to those that indeavour to walke uprightly before God in any measure Amos. 6.5 There are rules of their revaldry set downe they thrust and put away the day of the Lord farre from them that is the first law they make the first statute they enact thinke not of sinne now and meditate not of judgement now but come say they cast care away fling away and casheer those melancholly imaginations we have many failings let us not therefore be pondering of them and make our selves so much the more miserable this day shall be as yesterday and to morrow as to day no sorrow nor judgement no sinne now considered And this is remarkable and if a poore soule in that drunken distemper should be smitten by the hand of God and should suggest these words to his drunken companions We are all here merry and Jolly and let out our hearts in delight but for all this God will bring us to judgement the eyes of God seeth our now drinking and bezeling and the eare of God heareth our blasphemies and swearing and for these we shall one day be plagued why this should spoyle all the sport and jollity they could not be able to beare him but they would presētly fling him out of doores this is that which baneth many a soule therefore take notice of it if any of you have had a sight of sin marke if a drunkard go aside hang the winge a little marke what men doe if they can but once get him into their cōpany make him shake off those dumps and runne on in his former course then this hinders him from meditating on his sinnes and from being prepared for Christ and hence it is that many a poore soule that hath had the fire kindled the terrour that the Lord hath let into his soule would have hūbled his proud stomacke melted his stubborne heart but partly drunkennesse on the one side and merriness on another tooke away all the amazement whereby the soule might have beene wrought upon and he have received everlasting salvation Therfore thinke of it It was the course the Scripture observed in the lamenting Church Zach. 12.12 The house of David apart and their wives apart the house of Nathan apart and their wives apart There is no casting up of account in a crowd but if a man will cast up his account if he will see his sins cōsider his base practices he must go aside by himselfe loose occasions and vaine occasions withdraw the minde and plucke off the soule from seeing the evill and affecting the heart with it Therefore the Apostle Peter a little beyond my text when he saw the Jewes were affected with that he had delivered and that their hearts were touched when they asked him what they should doe he saith save your selves from this untoward generation God hath now touched your hearts suffer not Satan by these wicked Instrumēts of his to steale the terrour of God out of your harts for your drunken companions are like nothing else but those ravenous foules spoken of by Christ that deuoured the seed that fell by the way side the foule is the Devill the seed is the word of God now the Devill doth not plucke this out of the soule himselfe alone but often by cursed companions the ale-house is the bush that harbours those ravenous beasts and drunken companions are those The Devill useth to pluck out this good seed out of the heart therefore as you love your soules suffer not your selves to be drawne away by these cursed wretches do not suffer them to steale the worke of Gods spirit away which he hath wrought in your hearts this I observe to checke that cursed practice of men who when a man is troubled send him to play at cards or dice or the like which is the greatest meanes to hinder the worke of God in their hearts Thirdly seeing meditation brings marvelous comfort and profit to our soules then what remaines if I were silent the word it selfe would speake and the profit of the duty would speake and bring your hearts to addresse your soules to this you are therefore to be exhorted since you see what it is that God requires that with speed you set upon it and that with care and conscience you labour to persevere in the performance therof I beseech you thinke of it what is more usuall in the world then this that men should make sleight and little account of their sinnes nay to goe boult upright under those execrable abominations wherfore they stand guilty before God Looke as it was with Sampson he went away with the gates of Gaza and made nothing of them so there are many that carrie the gates of hell upon their backes as drunkennesse adultery and yet they feare not nor are affrighted thereat nay Gods owne servants that desire to looke towards Zion Is not this your complaint many times I cannot finde sinne heavy I confesse the word discovers it and reveales it but I cannot be troubled for it I cannot finde my soule burthened with it sinne is not heavy unto me but I carrie it away easily and make no bones of the matter though proud and leud and carelesse and untoward yet my hart is not apprehensive of the weight of it Let me speake unto you Are you not therfore here hindred in the way God requires of you because you weigh not ponder not those evill wayes you stād guiltie of before God but you are better content to see them and slight thē then to remember them lay them aside I beseech you to take notice of it Looke as it is with men in the world if five hundred pound weight bee laid on the ground if a man never plucke at it he shall not feele the weight of it your sinnes are not many hundreds but many thousand weights the least vaine thought you ever imagined the least idle word that ever you uttered are weight enough to presse your soules downe into everlasting perdition and therefore so many sinnes so great and so constantly committed against so much knowledge against so many comforts and incouragements against so many vowes and protestations are much more heavy and yet you see them nor the reason is you see thē not you weigh not pride you weigh not malice you weigh not dead heartednesse if you would weigh them seriously and consider of them thoroughly you would find that they were heavier then the sand on the sea shore but you will say how should we come to meditate on our sinnes that we may be comforted for this is the onely way But what course shall we take that we may be burdened here lies the skill Now for the opening of the point I will discover three things
he saith to himselfe Thou hast sinned and offended a just God and therefore thou must be damned and to hell thou must goe This is the particular seising of the curse upon a sinfull soule for this is the nature of true sorrow if evill be to come we feare it if evill be upon us we grieue and sorrow for it herein is the greatest worke of all the Lord deales diversly as he seeth fit specially these three wayes First if God have a purpose to civilize a man he will lay his sorrow as a fetter upon him he only meanes to civilize him and knocke off his fingers from base courses as wee have knowne some in our daies many desperate persecutors of Gods people God casts his sorrow into their hearts and then they say they will persecute Gods people no more haply they are naught still but God confines them first God only rippes the skinne a little and layeth some small blow upon him but if a man have been rude and a great ryoter the Lord begins to serve a writ upon him and saith Thou art the man to thee be it spoken thy sins are weighed and thou art found too light heaven and salvation is departed from thee thy sorrow is begunne here never to have end hereafter but thou must continue in endlesse torments thou hast continued in sinne and therefore expect the fierce anger of the Lord to be upon thee for ever so that now the soule seeth the flashes of hell and Gods wrath upon the soule and the terrours of hell lay hold upon the heart and he confesseth he is so and he hath done so And therfore he is a poore damned creature and then the soule labours to welter it and it may be his conscience will be deluded by some carnall minister that makes the way broader then it is and bids him goe and drinke and play and worke away his sorrow or else it may be he stops the mouth of conscience with some outward performances it may be his conscience saith Thou hast committed these these sinnes and thou wilt be damned for them And then he entreats conscience to be quiet hold his peace and he will pray in his family and heare sermons and take up some good courses and thus he takes up a quiet civill course and stayeth here a while at last comes to nothing And thus God leaves him in the lurch if he meanes only to civilize him But Secondly if God intends to doe good to a man he will not let him goe thus and fall to a civill course When a man begins to colour over his old sinnes and God hath broken his teeth that he cannot worry as formerly but yet there is no power in him If the Lord love that soule he will much the more clearely reveale his sinnes unto him God will plucke away all his chambering and wantonnesse all his pride and peevishnesse and pull off his vizzard and shew him all his sinnes and pursue him therefore as before God entred the blow so now he followes it home And hence it is that Iob saith The arrowes of the Almighty sticke fast in me and the venome thereof drinkes up my spirits and the terrours of the Almighty encampe themselves against me every way And as David saith Thou keepest my eyes waking and my sinnes are ever before me If God love a sinner and meane to doe good to him he will not let him looke off his sinne the Lord wil ferret him from his denne and from his base courses and practises He will be with you in all your stealing and pilfering and in all your cursed devises if you belong to him he will not give you over And in another place Iob saith How long wilt thou not depart from me nor let me alone till I swallow downe my spittle You had better a great deale now have your hearts humbled and broken and see your sinnes then to see them when there is no remedy And in another place the holy man Iob saith Thou wilt not suffer me to take in my breath but fillest me with bitternesse Your eyes have beholden vanity therefore now you shall see the Lords wrath against you for your sinnes and you have breathed out your venome against the Lord of heaven therefore now he will fill your soules with indignation in so much that he shall breath in his wrath as you have breathed out your oathes against him you have filled the Lords eyes and eares with your abominations and the Lord of heaven shall fill you answerably with his wrath And in another place Iob saith Thou wilt breake a dry leafe tossed too and fro And yet the Lord brake him Now the soule seeth all the evill and the Lord pursueth him and sets conscience aworke to the full Consider that of the Apostle That all those might be damned which beleeved not the truth but had pleasure in unrighteousnesse Even all of them What shall no great ones be saved No nor you little ones neither all that lay not hold upon Christ but have pleasure in unrighteousnesse not only great ones and such as are abominably prophane but even all that had pleasure in wickednesse Now conscience saith Doest not thou know that thou art one of them that have had pleasure in unrighteousnesse therefore away thou must goe and thou shalt be damned Now the soule shakes and is driven beyond it selfe and would utterly faint but that the Lord upholds it with one hand as he beates it downe with the other he thinkes that every thing is against him and the fire burnes to consume him and he thinkes the ayre will poyson him conscience flies in his face and he thinkes hell mouth is open to receive him and the wrath of God hangs over his head and if God should take away his life he should tumble head-long downe to hell Now the soule is beyond all shift when it is day he wisheth it were night when it is night he wisheth it were day the wrath of God followeth him wheresoever he goeth and the soule would faine be rid of this but he cannot and yet all the while the soule is not heavy and sorrowfull for sinne he is burdened and could be content to throw away the punishment and horror of sinne but not the sweet of sinne as it is with a child that taâ—es a live coale in his hand thinking to play with it when he feeles fire in it he throws it away he doth not throw it away because it is blacke but because it burnes him So it is here A sinfull wretch will throw away his sinne because of the wrath of God that is due to him for it and the drunkard will be drunke no more but if he might have his queanes and his pots without any punishment or trouble he would have them with all his heart he loves the blacke and sweet of sinne well enough but he loves not the plague of sinne Foolish people saith the