meet_v he_o and_o mr._n young_a will_v ask_v i_o whether_o i_o do_v know_v jesus_n christ_n or_o not_o and_o what_o i_o do_v think_v he_o to_o be_v i_o tell_v he_o that_o i_o have_v read_v in_o the_o scripture_n and_o they_o hold_v he_o out_o to_o be_v the_o son_n of_o god_n and_o that_o he_o come_v to_o seek_v and_o to_o save_v that_o which_o be_v lose_v then_o say_v mr._n young_a unto_o i_o why_o do_v you_o draw_v back_o in_o not_o come_v to_o hear_v the_o word_n i_o tell_v he_o it_o be_v because_o of_o the_o deriding_n of_o the_o people_n i_o but_o say_v mr._n young_a you_o must_v persevere_v and_o hold_v on_o in_o a_o continuance_n open_v some_o scripture_n as_o that_o of_o the_o hebrew_n that_o be_v once_o enlighten_v and_o have_v taste_v the_o good_a word_n and_o of_o the_o power_n of_o the_o world_n to_o come_v if_o that_o soul_n shall_v fall_v away_o then_o there_o will_v be_v nothing_o but_o a_o fearful_a look_v for_o the_o fiery_a indignation_n of_o god_n this_o do_v much_o trouble_v i_o so_o that_o i_o be_v very_o fearful_a to_o be_v damn_v then_o mr._n young_a do_v open_v that_o scripture_n in_o 1_o thess_n 1.4_o 5._o you_o say_v that_o you_o know_v jesus_n christ_n to_o be_v your_o saviour_n therefore_o take_v heed_n for_o jesus_n shall_v appear_v in_o flame_a fire_n against_o all_o those_o that_o know_v he_o not_o nor_o obey_v not_o his_o gospel_n this_o put_v i_o in_o great_a fear_n and_o horror_n worse_o than_o before_o then_o i_o do_v entreat_v mr._n young_a to_o tell_v i_o what_o the_o gospel_n be_v and_o he_o bid_v i_o read_v in_o the_o first_o of_o matth._n and_o there_o it_o be_v this_o that_o the_o gospel_n be_v the_o glad_a tiding_n to_o the_o shepherd_n that_o it_o be_v the_o good_a will_n of_o god_n to_o send_v jesus_n christ_n to_o save_v sinner_n whereof_o i_o do_v confess_v with_o the_o apostle_n paul_n that_o i_o be_v chief_a mr._n young_a at_o part_v give_v i_o these_o instruction_n that_o i_o shall_v be_v very_o careful_a what_o company_n i_o do_v go_v into_o and_o that_o i_o shall_v always_o remember_v my_o creator_n in_o the_o day_n of_o my_o youth_n and_o this_o be_v very_o fresh_a in_o my_o memory_n and_o do_v strengthen_v i_o very_o much_o against_o the_o temptation_n of_o satan_n and_o keep_v i_o from_o frequent_v those_o companion_n that_o i_o do_v former_o use_v and_o if_o at_o any_o time_n i_o meet_v they_o and_o hear_v their_o idle_a word_n than_o this_o scripture_n do_v often_o come_v into_o my_o mind_n remember_v thy_o creator_n in_o the_o day_n of_o thy_o youth_n and_o do_v very_o much_o cheer_v my_o spirit_n and_o carry_v i_o along_o for_o many_o year_n until_o it_o please_v god_n to_o bring_v i_o to_o london_n and_o come_v to_o black_a friar_n under_o the_o ministry_n of_o dr._n gouge_n i_o be_v very_o much_o edify_v for_o two_o year_n together_o but_o come_v to_o live_v at_o westminster_n i_o do_v profit_n but_o little_a again_o until_o it_o please_v god_n to_o send_v mr._n marshal_n and_o hear_v of_o he_o speak_v out_o of_o jeremiah_n 14._o of_o the_o famine_n be_v in_o the_o outward_a man_n but_o there_o be_v the_o famine_n or_o the_o word_n of_o god_n at_o westminster_n it_o make_v i_o very_o attentive_a to_o his_o doctrine_n he_o complain_v what_o a_o barbarous_a place_n westminster_n have_v be_v but_o now_o he_o do_v hope_n that_o the_o word_n of_o god_n will_v take_v effect_n in_o the_o heart_n of_o some_o of_o his_o hearer_n and_o true_o so_o it_o do_v on_o my_o heart_n for_o i_o be_v a_o constant_a hearer_n of_o he_o and_o then_o go_v to_o a_o friend_n family_n i_o hear_v they_o repeat_v the_o note_n that_o they_o have_v take_v from_o master_n marshal_n and_o since_o i_o continue_v with_o that_o company_n of_o godly_a people_n and_o now_o it_o be_v the_o desire_n of_o my_o soul_n to_o have_v fellowship_n with_o the_o father_n and_o the_o son_n that_o my_o soul_n may_v thrive_v in_o grace_n and_o in_o the_o knowledge_n and_o great_a love_n of_o that_o god_n that_o so_o love_v the_o world_n that_o he_o give_v his_o son_n to_o die_v to_o save_v such_o as_o i_o be_o and_o that_o whosoever_o come_v to_o he_o shall_v not_o perish_v but_o have_v eternal_a life_n with_o who_o i_o beseech_v the_o lord_n i_o may_v walk_v in_o a_o more_o close_a way_n to_o the_o end_n of_o my_o life_n than_o ever_o i_o have_v yet_o do_v j._n h._n fourteen_o experience_n of_o t._n p._n i_o have_v have_v thought_n concern_v my_o spiritual_a condition_n and_o make_v search_n into_o my_o soul_n touch_v my_o estate_n in_o relation_n to_o god_n and_o what_o testimony_n i_o can_v find_v of_o my_o interest_n in_o and_o conversion_n to_o god_n and_o i_o have_v find_v this_o to_o be_v the_o way_n of_o god_n work_v to_o bring_v i_o to_o himself_o through_o his_o great_a mercy_n in_o the_o lord_n jesus_n it_o have_v please_v god_n ever_o since_o i_o be_v bear_v to_o place_v i_o under_o the_o mean_n of_o the_o gospel_n the_o neglect_n whereof_o have_v be_v a_o great_a trouble_n and_o grief_n unto_o my_o soul_n this_o with_o many_o sin_n more_o lay_v heavy_a upon_o my_o conscience_n especial_o some_o offence_n and_o wrong_n offer_v against_o the_o people_n of_o god_n insomuch_o that_o the_o terror_n of_o hell_n lay_v hold_v upon_o i_o and_o i_o begin_v with_o cain_n to_o cry_v out_o that_o my_o burden_n be_v more_o than_o i_o be_v able_a to_o bear_v i_o be_v a_o damn_a creature_n i_o be_v out_o of_o the_o presence_n and_o favour_n of_o god_n and_o never_o like_a to_o see_v his_o face_n with_o comfort_n ready_a with_o judas_n to_o destroy_v myself_o i_o continue_v in_o thiis_fw-la condition_n many_o year_n but_o god_n of_o his_o exceed_a mercy_n keep_v i_o from_o that_o great_a sin_n and_o at_o last_o i_o receive_v some_o comfort_n in_o that_o the_o lord_n proclaim_v himself_o to_o be_v the_o lord_n god_n gracious_a merciful_a long-suffering_a in_o forgive_a sin_n and_o that_o he_o desire_v not_o the_o death_n of_o a_o sinner_n but_o rather_o that_o he_o shall_v live_v and_o again_o he_o say_v if_o our_o sin_n be_v as_o scarlet_a he_o will_v make_v they_o as_o white_a as_o snow_n or_o wool_n again_o i_o be_o the_o lord_n and_o change_v not_o therefore_o you_o son_n of_o jacob_n be_v not_o consume_v these_o with_o many_o other_o promise_n of_o free_a grace_n and_o mercy_n yield_v some_o comfort_n to_o my_o soul_n yet_o for_o a_o long_a time_n i_o be_v trouble_v if_o i_o pray_v i_o fear_v my_o prayer_n be_v a_o abomination_n unto_o the_o lord_n at_o last_o know_v the_o lord_n hear_v the_o ninivites_n that_o be_v heathen_n i_o think_v he_o be_v as_o able_a to_o save_v my_o soul_n and_o it_o have_v be_v my_o care_n to_o wait_v upon_o god_n in_o the_o mean_n know_v that_o faith_n come_v by_o hear_v the_o word_n and_o upon_o all_o occasion_n to_o search_v my_o own_o heart_n what_o part_n of_o the_o word_n belong_v unto_o i_o and_o what_o do_v not_o i_o receive_v some_o comfort_n from_o these_o promise_n i_o will_v not_o break_v the_o bruise_a reed_n nor_o quench_v the_o smoke_a flax_n come_v unto_o i_o all_o you_o that_o and_o weary_a and_o heavy_a lade_v and_o i_o will_v give_v you_o rest_n and_o he_o that_o come_v unto_o i_o i_o will_v in_o no_o wise_a cast_v off_o these_o gracious_a promise_n cause_v i_o to_o desire_v to_o draw_v near_o to_o god_n in_o union_n and_o in_o communion_n with_o who_o i_o hope_v for_o fellowship_n to_o all_o eternity_n t._n p._n xv._o experience_n of_o m._n w._n when_o i_o live_v in_o ireland_n and_o be_v in_o fullness_n of_o outward_a enjoyment_n i_o have_v my_o thought_n much_o take_v up_o about_o the_o thing_n of_o the_o world_n but_o little_o serious_o touch_v the_o salvation_n of_o my_o soul_n but_o some_o year_n since_o be_v at_o liverpoole_n in_o lancashire_n i_o hear_v a_o sermon_n preach_v by_o mr._n tompson_n his_o text_n be_v redeem_v the_o time_n because_o the_o day_n be_v evil_a many_o thing_n he_o speak_v so_o home_o to_o my_o soul_n that_o i_o be_v very_o much_o trouble_v i_o have_v spend_v so_o many_o day_n in_o evil_a that_o i_o have_v be_v covetous_a and_o proud_a and_o impatient_a in_o the_o former_a day_n of_o my_o life_n yet_o if_o please_v the_o lord_n i_o have_v a_o husband_n that_o be_v a_o honest_a man_n and_o one_o that_o fear_v god_n who_o have_v often_o give_v i_o good_a counsel_n and_o persuade_v i_o to_o make_v some_o promise_n of_o amendment_n but_o i_o have_v child_n and_o servant_n and_o cattle_n and_o live_v plentiful_o in_o ireland_n from_o whence_o i_o have_v late_o come_v with_o my_o husband_n and_o family_n and_o
in_o prison_n i_o have_v dreadful_a apprehension_n of_o hell_n in_o my_o soul_n and_o can_v do_v nothing_o but_o weep_v and_o mourn_v and_o pray_v count_v my_o life_n to_o be_v lose_v and_o yet_o i_o be_v more_o trouble_v for_o the_o wrath_n of_o god_n than_o the_o wrath_n of_o man_n but_o at_o length_n it_o please_v god_n to_o give_v i_o comfort_n for_o one_o night_n whilst_o i_o be_v bemoan_v myself_o and_o in_o much_o despair_n on_o a_o sudden_a the_o room_n be_v all_o in_o a_o flame_n and_o i_o think_v myself_o in_o the_o midst_n of_o lightning_n and_o be_v terrify_v i_o imagine_v i_o see_v these_o word_n write_v against_o the_o wall_n thy_o sin_n be_v pardon_v and_o thy_o life_n be_v hide_v with_o christ_n in_o god_n this_o extraordinary_a manifestation_n much_o ease_v the_o trouble_n and_o sorrow_n wherein_o i_o be_v but_o yet_o for_o want_v of_o faith_n this_o comfort_n do_v not_o long_o continue_v with_o i_o for_o after_o that_o i_o think_v i_o see_v the_o lord_n with_o such_o a_o wrathful_a countenance_n that_o i_o dare_v not_o look_v upon_o he_o and_o the_o next_o news_n that_o i_o hear_v be_v that_o i_o be_v order_v to_o be_v shoot_v to_o death_n oh_o than_o i_o can_v express_v the_o terror_n that_o i_o be_v in_o my_o woeful_a misery_n be_v such_o that_o neither_o prayer_n read_v of_o the_o scripture_n nor_o the_o precious_a promise_n therein_o can_v afford_v i_o any_o relief_n for_o i_o can_v not_o believe_v that_o i_o have_v any_o right_n to_o they_o and_o therefore_o can_v not_o lay_v hold_n of_o they_o in_o this_o dreadful_a distress_n i_o lie_v a_o condemn_a man_n both_o in_o soul_n and_o body_n lament_v my_o wretched_a condition_n when_o open_v the_o bible_n in_o joel_n 2.13_o i_o see_v it_o thus_o write_v turn_v you_o to_o the_o lord_n god_n for_o he_o be_v gracious_a and_o merciful_a slow_a to_o anger_n and_o of_o great_a tenderness_n and_o repent_v he_o of_o the_o evil._n hereupon_o i_o ponder_v a_o while_n and_o say_v and_o be_v he_o such_o a_o god_n well_o then_o he_o be_v my_o god_n and_o with_o that_o i_o give_v myself_o up_o into_o his_o hand_n resolve_v to_o rely_v upon_o he_o let_v he_o do_v what_o he_o will_v with_o i_o and_o on_o this_o foundation_n i_o be_v settle_a and_o satisfy_v a_o while_n after_o it_o please_v the_o lord_n to_o deliver_v i_o out_o of_o the_o danger_n of_o death_n and_o to_o set_v i_o at_o liberty_n from_o prison_n but_o notwithstanding_o this_o great_a mercy_n yet_o i_o must_v confess_v that_o i_o afterward_o find_v such_o opposition_n in_o my_o heart_n against_o god_n as_o i_o can_v not_o believe_v have_v be_v in_o i_o i_o be_v grievous_o wound_v for_o it_o and_o can_v have_v no_o quiet_a but_o go_v to_o mr._n w._n and_o acquaint_v he_o with_o it_o who_o tell_v i_o that_o i_o have_v fall_v from_o my_o first_o work_n and_o that_o i_o must_v repent_v this_o rent_n my_o heart_n and_o i_o have_v no_o rest_n i_o return_v from_o he_o and_o apply_v to_o prayer_n keep_v that_o course_n continual_o till_o by_o degree_n i_o be_v recover_v out_o of_o that_o disconsolate_a condition_n and_o i_o praise_v god_n i_o have_v since_o find_v his_o favour_n and_o kindness_n extend_v towards_o i_o so_o that_o i_o be_o full_o persuade_v he_o love_v i_o and_o will_v pardon_v my_o sin_n in_o jesus_n christ_n on_o who_o merit_n i_o rely_v in_o who_o righteousness_n i_o rest_v and_o by_o who_o grace_n i_o be_o now_o set_v free_a to_o serve_v he_o here_o and_o doubt_v not_o but_o to_o reign_v with_o he_o hereafter_o f._n b._n v._o experience_n of_o h._n m._n my_o father_n be_v a_o gentleman_n of_o a_o fair_a estate_n have_v many_o child_n eleven_o son_n of_o we_o he_o be_v high_a sheriff_n and_o when_o he_o die_v all_o our_o family_n be_v break_v disperse_a and_o in_o confusion_n two_o of_o we_o be_v bring_v up_o within_o five_o mile_n of_o gloucester_n but_o i_o be_v place_v a_o apprentice_n in_o london_n and_o by_o this_o mean_v my_o sorrow_n and_o trouble_n begin_v to_o be_v great_a at_o first_o from_o the_o consideration_n of_o this_o sudden_a change_n which_o continue_v a_o while_n but_o about_o the_o 17_o year_n of_o my_o age_n my_o former_a grief_n be_v turn_v into_o another_o kind_n of_o trouble_n namely_o sorrow_n for_o my_o sin_n i_o be_v for_o three_o year_n together_o wound_v with_o the_o sense_n of_o my_o sin_n and_o corruption_n which_o be_v many_o i_o follow_v sermon_n pursue_v the_o mean_n be_v constant_a in_o duty_n and_o do_v look_v for_o heaven_n that_o way_n i_o be_v very_o precise_a in_o outward_a formality_n censure_v all_o for_o reprobate_n that_o wear_v their_o hair_n long_o and_o not_o short_a above_o their_o ear_n or_o that_o follow_v the_o common_a mode_n and_o fashion_n of_o those_o day_n thus_o i_o continue_v distract_v in_o my_o thought_n and_o wound_v in_o my_o conscience_n weep_v often_o and_o bitter_o and_o pray_v earnest_o but_o yet_o have_v no_o comfort_n till_o i_o hear_v that_o sweet_a saint_n now_o in_o heaven_n dr._n sibbs_n by_o who_o mean_n and_o ministry_n i_o be_v bring_v to_o peace_n and_o joy_n in_o my_o spirit_n his_o sweet_a soul-melting_a sermon_n win_v my_o heart_n and_o refresh_v i_o much_o for_o by_o he_o i_o see_v much_o of_o the_o goodness_n of_o god_n and_o have_v good_a hope_n and_o confidence_n in_o christ_n jesus_n and_o can_v overlook_v the_o world_n undervalue_v all_o earthly_a thing_n and_o be_v not_o afraid_a of_o affliction_n and_o though_o i_o be_v sometime_o under_o the_o spirit_n of_o bondage_n again_o unto_o fear_n yet_o my_o heart_n still_o hold_v firm_a and_o my_o desire_n be_v all_o heaven-ward_n i_o take_v delight_n to_o hear_v funeral_n sermon_n but_o dr._n sibbs_n chief_o by_o who_o i_o be_v effectual_o wrought_v upon_o and_o satisfy_v with_o comfort_n which_o i_o hope_v will_v never_o leave_v i_o till_o i_o come_v to_o everlasting_a rest_n h._n m._n vi_o experience_n of_o mr._n t._n h._n minister_n of_o the_o gospel_n i_o be_v but_o young_a when_o i_o first_o come_v under_o conviction_n of_o soul_n and_o my_o heart_n be_v warm_v by_o a_o zealous_a ministry_n which_o put_v i_o much_o upon_o duty_n i_o use_v to_o read_v the_o scripture_n every_o night_n and_o to_o repeat_v sermon_n often_o and_o so_o i_o spend_v the_o first_o scene_n of_o my_o youth_n till_o i_o be_v send_v by_o my_o friend_n to_o london_n where_o i_o live_v a_o year_n or_o two_o during_o that_o time_n as_o often_o as_o i_o see_v any_o minister_n i_o can_v not_o but_o weep_v and_o always_o wish_v that_o i_o may_v be_v one_o myself_o to_o be_v able_a to_o preach_v too_o after_o this_o i_o be_v send_v to_o one_o of_o the_o university_n in_o england_n but_o be_v wild_a with_o youthful_a company_n be_v remove_v to_o the_o college_n of_o dublin_n where_o i_o continue_v till_o the_o horrid_a popish_a rebellion_n break_v out_o in_o 1641._o at_o which_o time_n i_o leave_v it_o and_o go_v to_o liverpool_n in_o lancashire_n where_o i_o preach_v some_o year_n yet_o all_o this_o while_n i_o be_v but_o formal_a and_o as_o the_o young_a man_n in_o the_o gospel_n say_v he_o have_v keep_v all_o these_o thing_n from_o his_o youth_n so_o i_o be_v from_o from_o my_o youth_n religious_a well_o give_v love_v the_o mean_n and_o follow_v they_o hear_v sermon_n and_o seek_v to_o serve_v god_n but_o alas_o i_o be_v yet_o all_o this_o while_n in_o darkness_n and_o do_v not_o know_v it_o but_o afterward_o i_o see_v that_o i_o be_v blind_a and_o carnal_a for_o i_o begin_v to_o be_v in_o great_a doubt_n and_o trouble_n and_o very_o much_o cloud_v in_o my_o spirit_n and_o be_v exceed_o tie_v and_o bind_v up_o for_o a_o time_n under_o the_o sense_n of_o my_o formal_a holiness_n and_o sin_n but_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o give_v i_o light_n once_o as_o i_o be_v walk_v sad_o alone_a upon_o the_o mountain_n it_o please_v the_o lord_n so_o to_o influence_n i_o by_o his_o spirit_n which_o seem_v to_o be_v immediate_o pour_v out_o upon_o i_o that_o my_o soul_n be_v satisfy_v in_o jesus_n christ_n and_o my_o heart_n be_v fill_v with_o heavenly_a joy_n and_o peace_n and_o with_o most_o ravish_a contemplation_n which_o continue_v without_o a_o cloud_n for_o several_a week_n together_o and_o give_v i_o assure_v hope_n of_o the_o love_n of_o god_n and_o ever_o since_o i_o have_v live_v in_o the_o righteousness_n of_o the_o lord_n jesus_n christ_n and_o though_o i_o have_v meet_v with_o many_o storm_n and_o cloud_n yet_o they_o have_v all_o pass_v away_o and_o can_v hinder_v i_o from_o salvation_n so_o long_o as_o christ_n who_o be_v my_o lord_n and_o saviour_n be_v above_o they_o and_o i_o doubt_v not_o
famous_a men._n pr._n 1_o s._n 20._o unparalleled_a variety_n or_o the_o matchless_a action_n and_o passion_n of_o mankind_n display_v in_o near_o 400._o notable_a instance_n and_o example_n discover_v the_o transcendent_a effect_n 1._o of_o love_n friendship_n and_o gratitude_n 2._o of_o magnanimity_n courage_n and_o fidelity_n 3._o of_o chastity_n temperance_n and_o humility_n and_o on_o the_o contrary_a the_o tremendous_a consequence_n 4._o of_o hatred_n revenge_n and_o ingratitude_n 5._o of_o cowardice_n barbarity_n and_o treachery_n 6._o of_o unchastity_n intemperance_n and_o ambition_n embellish_v with_o figure_n pr._n 1_o s._n 21._o the_o kingdom_n of_o darkness_n or_o the_o history_n of_o demon_n spectre_n witch_n apparitions_z &_o other_o supernatural_a delusion_n &_o malicious_a imposture_n of_o the_o devil_n contain_v near_o 80_o memorable_a relation_n foreign_a and_o domestic_a ancient_a and_o modern_a collect_v from_o author_n of_o undoubted_a verity_n with_o pictureâ—_n pr._n 1_o s._n 22._o surprise_v miracle_n of_o nature_n and_o art_n in_o two_o part_n contain_v 1._o miracle_n of_o nature_n or_o the_o wonderful_a sign_n and_o prodigious_a aspect_n and_o appearance_n in_o the_o heaven_n earth_n and_o sea_n with_o a_o account_n of_o the_o most_o famous_a comet_n and_o other_o prodigy_n from_o the_o birth_n of_o christ_n to_o this_o time_n 2._o miracle_n of_o art_n describe_v the_o most_o magnificent_a building_n and_o other_o curious_a invention_n in_o all_o age_n as_o the_o seven_o wonder_n in_o the_o world_n etc._n etc._n beautify_v with_o picture_n pr._n 1_o s._n 23._o the_o general_a history_n of_o earthquake_n or_o a_o account_n of_o the_o most_o remarkable_a earthquake_n in_o divers_a part_n of_o the_o world_n from_o the_o creation_n to_o this_o time_n particular_o those_o late_o in_o naples_n smyrna_n jamaica_n england_n and_o sicily_n with_o a_o description_n of_o the_o famous_a burn_a mount_n aetna_n and_o several_a other_o late_a strange_a 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hitchin_n in_o hartsordshire_n instant_o heal_v of_o the_o king_n be_v evil_a under_o which_o he_o have_v languish_v twenty_o year_n pr._n 1_o s._n 24._o memorable_a accident_n and_o unheard_a of_o transaction_n contain_v a_o account_n of_o several_a strange_a event_n as_o the_o depose_v of_o tyrant_n lamentable_a shipwreck_n dismal_a misfortune_n stratagem_n of_o war_n perilous_a adventure_n happy_a deliverance_n with_o other_o select_a historical_a passage_n in_o several_a country_n in_o this_o last_o age._n print_v at_o brustel_v in_o 1691._o and_o dedicate_v to_o k._n william_n etc._n etc._n publish_a in_o english_a by_o r._n b._n pr._n 1_o s._n 25._o martyr_n in_o flame_n or_o popery_n in_o its_o true_a colour_n be_v a_o relation_n of_o the_o horrid_a persecution_n of_o the_o pope_n and_o church_n of_o rome_n for_o many_o hundred_o of_o year_n past_a in_o piedmont_n bohemia_n germany_n poland_n lithuania_n france_n italy_n spain_n portugal_n scotland_n &_o ireland_n and_o england_n with_o a_o abstract_n of_o the_o cruelty_n exâ—â—sed_v upon_o the_o protestant_n in_o france_n and_o savoy_n in_o 1686_o and_o 1687._o and_o a_o account_n of_o god_n judgement_n upon_o popish_a persecutor_n pr._n 1_o s._n miscellany_n 26._o delight_n for_o the_o ingenious_a in_o above_o fifty_o select_a emblem_n divine_a and_o moral_a curious_o engrave_v on_o copper_n plate_n with_o 50_o delightful_a poem_n and_o lot_n for_o the_o lively_a illustration_n of_o each_o emblem_n whereby_o instruction_n may_v be_v promote_v by_o pleasant_a recreation_n to_o which_o be_v prefix_v a_o poem_n entitle_v majesty_n in_o misery_n or_o a_o imploration_n of_o the_o k_o of_o king_n write_v by_o k._n charles_n i._o in_o carisbrook_n castle_n in_o the_o isle_n of_o wight_n 1648._o with_o a_o curious_a emblem_n collect_v by_o r._n b._n price_n 2_o s._n 6_o d._n 27._o excellent_a contemplation_n divine_a and_o moral_a write_v by_o a._n l._n capel_n with_o some_o account_n of_o his_o life_n his_o letter_n to_o his_o lady_n and_o his_o last_o speech_n also_o the_o speech_n of_o d._n hamilton_n and_o the_o earl_n of_o holland_n who_o suffer_v with_o he_o price_n one_o shilling_n 28._o winter_n evening_n entertainâ—ment_n in_o two_o part_n contain_v 1._o ten_o pleasant_a relation_n of_o many_o notable_a accident_n 2._o fifty_o ingenious_a riddle_n with_o thâ—ir_a explanation_n observation_n and_o moral_n upon_o each_o enliven_a with_o above_o 60_o picture_n for_o illustrate_v every_o story_n and_o riddle_n excellent_o accommodate_v for_o cheerful_a society_n and_o conversation_n pr._n 1_o s._n 29._o esops_n fable_n in_o prose_n and_o verse_n the_o 2d_o part_v collect_v from_o ancient_n and_o modern_a author_n with_o picture_n and_o proper_a moral_n to_o every_o fable_n several_a of_o they_o applicable_a to_o the_o present_a time_n pr._n 1_o s._n by_o r._n b._n divinity_n 30._o the_o divine_a banquet_n or_o sacramental_a devotion_n consist_v of_o morning_n and_o evening_n prayer_n contemplation_n and_o hymn_n for_o every_o day_n in_o the_o week_n in_o order_n to_o a_o more_o solemn_a preparation_n for_o the_o worthy_a receive_v of_o the_o holy_a communion_n represent_v the_o several_a step_n and_o degree_n of_o the_o sorrow_n and_o suffering_n of_o our_o bless_a saviour_n till_o he_o give_v up_o the_o ghost_n as_o 1._o his_o agony_n in_o the_o garden_n 2._o his_o be_v betray_v by_o judas_n 3._o his_o be_v false_o accuse_v smite_a bufâ—e_a ed_z and_o spiâ—_n upon_o before_o caiphas_n the_o high_a priest_n 4._o his_o condemnetion_n scourge_v crown_v with_o thorn_n and_o be_v deliver_v to_o be_v crucify_a by_o pontius_n pilate_n 5_o his_o bearing_z the_o cross_n 6._o his_o crucifixion_n 7._o our_o saviour_n institution_n of_o the_o bless_a sacrament_n with_o brief_a resolution_n to_o these_o objection_n allege_v for_o the_o omission_n of_o this_o important_a duty_n and_o eight_o curious_a sculpture_n proper_a to_o the_o several_a part_n with_o grace_n imprimatur_fw-la z._n isham_n r._n p._n d._n hen._n episc_n lond._n a_o sacris_fw-la pr._n 1_o s._n 31._o a_o guide_n to_o eternal_a glory_n or_o brief_a direction_n to_o all_o christian_n how_o to_o atain_a everlasting_a salvation_n to_o which_o be_v add_v several_a other_o small_a tract_n as_o 1._o save_v faith_n discover_v in_o three_o heavenly_a conference_n between_o our_o bless_a saviour_n and_o 1._o a_o publican_n 2._o a_o pharisee_n 3._o a_o doubt_v christian_n 2._o the_o threefold_a state_n of_o a_o christian_a 1._o by_o nature_n 2._o by_o grace_n 3._o in_o glory_n 3._o the_o scripture_n concord_n compile_v out_o of_o the_o word_n of_o scripture_n by_o way_n of_o question_n and_o answer_n wherein_o there_o be_v the_o sum_n of_o the_o way_n to_o salvation_n and_o spiritual_a thing_n compare_v with_o spiritual_a 4._o the_o character_n of_o a_o true_a christian_n 5._o a_o brief_a directory_n for_o the_o great_a necessary_a and_o advantageous_a duty_n of_o self-examination_n â—hereby_o a_o serious_a christian_a may_v every_o day_n examâ—â—imself_n 6._o a_o short_a dialogue_n between_o a_o learned_a diâ—ine_n and_o a_o beggar_n 7._o beam_n of_o the_o spirit_n or_o cordial_a meditation_n enliven_a enlighten_v and_o glad_v the_o soul_n 8._o the_o seraphic_a soul_n triumph_n in_o the_o love_n of_o god_n with_o short_a remembrance_n and_o pious_a thought_n 9_o history_n improve_v of_o christian_a application_n of_o divers_a rema_n kable_a passage_n in_o history_n 10._o holy_a breathe_n in_o several_a divine_a poem_n upon_o divers_a subject_n and_o scripture_n pr._n 1_o s._n 32._o youth_n divine_a pastime_n contain_v forty_o remarkable_a scripture_n history_n turn_v into_o english_a verse_n with_o forty_o picture_n proper_a to_o each_o story_n very_o delightful_a for_o the_o virtuous_a employ_v the_o vacant_a hour_n of_o young_a person_n and_o prevent_v vicious_a divertisement_n wâ—th_o scripture_n hymn_n upon_o divers_a occasion_n price_n 8_o d._n 33._o the_o young_a man_n call_v or_o the_o â—â—ole_a duty_n of_o youth_n in_o a_o serious_a and_o compassionate_a
soul_n i_o shall_v add_v no_o more_o but_o proceed_v to_o give_v a_o account_n of_o the_o wonderful_a deal_n of_o the_o almighty_a with_o my_o unworthy_a self_n to_o give_v a_o formal_a account_n of_o my_o life_n will_v be_v tedious_a though_o i_o may_v safe_o say_v in_o every_o year_n sinee_n i_o can_v remember_v i_o have_v be_v enrich_v with_o so_o many_o and_o such_o remarkable_a experience_n as_o may_v make_v some_o rather_o admire_v than_o believe_v they_o and_o first_o when_o i_o be_v a_o schoolboy_n at_o malden_n in_o essex_n i_o begin_v to_o be_v rouse_v by_o two_o man_n mr._n will._n fenner_n and_o mr._n stephen_n martial_n about_o the_o ten_o year_n of_o my_o age_n for_o before_o that_o i_o be_v i_o know_v not_o what_o though_o i_o be_v keep_v to_o read_v every_o day_n be_v catechise_v with_o other_o good_a order_n but_o then_o hear_v mr._n fenner_n full_a of_o zeal_n and_o see_v he_o thunder_v about_o and_o beat_v the_o pulpit_n i_o be_v amaze_v and_o think_v he_o be_v mad_a wonder_v what_o he_o mean_v now_o whilst_o i_o be_v gaze_v upon_o he_o i_o be_v sudden_o strike_v and_o perceive_v it_o be_v we_o that_o be_v mad_a which_o make_v he_o seem_v to_o be_v so_o oh_o say_v he_o you_o knotty_a rugged_a proud_a piece_n of_o flesh_n you_o stony_a rocky_a flinty_a hard_a heart_n what_o will_v you_o do_v when_o you_o be_v roar_v in_o hell_n among_o the_o damn_a &_o c_o this_o make_v i_o at_o first_o astonish_v and_o run_v so_o often_o in_o my_o mind_n afterward_o that_o i_o begin_v to_o be_v trouble_v scare_v and_o affright_v and_o for_o fear_n of_o go_v to_o hell_n i_o fall_v to_o pray_v hear_v sermon_n read_v the_o scripture_n morning_n and_o evening_n though_o i_o understand_v little_a but_o only_o think_v the_o bare_a read_v sufficient_a i_o learn_v to_o pray_v first_o out_o of_o book_n and_o get_v all_o the_o grace_n so_o call_v by_o heart_n and_o after_o family-prayer_n i_o be_v every_o night_n afraid_a the_o devil_n will_v carry_v i_o away_o to_o hell_n if_o i_o do_v not_o say_v my_o prayer_n our_o father_n etc._n etc._n and_o i_o believe_v in_o god_n etc._n etc._n with_o the_o ten_o commandment_n and_o my_o little_a catechism_n of_o dr._n hall_n which_o i_o have_v learn_v and_o this_o i_o do_v due_o every_o night_n before_o i_o dare_v sleep_v which_o i_o think_v a_o sufficient_a defence_n to_o preserve_v i_o from_o the_o devil_n be_v tear_v i_o in_o piece_n before_o morning_n yet_o sometime_o when_o i_o be_v sleepy_a to_o make_v more_o haste_n i_o will_v say_v some_o of_o they_o in_o the_o chimney-corner_n whilst_o i_o be_v undress_v i_o think_v all_o be_v well_o enough_o so_o it_o be_v but_o do_v yea_o when_o i_o be_v extreme_o surprise_v with_o fear_n of_o the_o devil_n be_v apt_a to_o fancy_v any_o thing_n to_o be_v he_o i_o often_o say_v all_o my_o prayer_n and_o commandment_n twice_o over_o suspect_v i_o have_v not_o say_v they_o well_o enough_o or_o have_v for_o haste_n leave_v out_o some_o of_o they_o and_o the_o like_a and_o thus_o as_o the_o apostle_n say_v when_o i_o be_v a_o child_n i_o do_v childish_a thing_n and_o think_v all_o this_o be_v very_o well_o and_o ofttimes_o i_o will_v get_v one_o of_o my_o playfellow_n to_o walk_v alone_o with_o i_o and_o will_v tell_v he_o of_o sin_n and_o hell_n and_o such_o matter_n for_o they_o run_v always_o in_o my_o mind_n and_o i_o be_v in_o a_o desperate_a fear_n at_o length_n go_v to_o hear_v mr._n martial_n whilst_o i_o be_v nod_v and_o almost_o asleep_a his_o powerful_a voice_n awaken_v i_o thunder_v in_o my_o ear_n the_o dreadful_a danger_n of_o such_o as_o be_v drowsy_a and_o sleep_v and_o slumber_v away_o their_o salvation_n which_o i_o think_v be_v speak_v direct_o to_o i_o and_o have_v such_o prevalency_n upon_o i_o that_o i_o start_v up_o with_o a_o ache_a heart_n be_v much_o terrify_v at_o his_o word_n which_o he_o still_o pursue_v and_o wound_v i_o to_o the_o heart_n when_o he_o tell_v we_o that_o when_o time_n be_v past_a it_o can_v never_o be_v recall_v again_o and_o that_o there_o be_v no_o other_o way_n but_o to_o double_v our_o diligence_n and_o redeem_v the_o time_n we_o have_v lose_v by_o make_v more_o haste_n and_o take_v more_o care_n and_o pain_n or_o else_o we_o shall_v be_v utter_o lose_v and_o undo_v this_o touch_v i_o sufficient_o so_o that_o i_o can_v not_o forbear_v weep_v extreme_o after_o sermon_n i_o go_v home_o and_o sit_v alone_o i_o fall_v to_o cry_v and_o complain_v that_o i_o have_v lose_v my_o time_n take_v up_o a_o resolution_n never_o to_o sleep_v at_o church_n again_o and_o i_o think_v i_o have_v keep_v that_o solemn_a covenant_n to_o this_o very_a day_n after_o this_o i_o be_v not_o content_a with_o my_o former_a customary_a duty_n for_o now_o i_o must_v double_v they_o and_o do_v more_o than_o before_o wherefore_o i_o resolve_v to_o write_v down_o the_o sermon_n i_o hear_v as_o well_o as_o i_o can_v but_o have_v little_a skill_n to_o write_v fast_o or_o orderly_o i_o ever_o observe_v the_o doctrine_n reason_n and_o head_n of_o the_o use_v which_o i_o get_v by_o heart_n repeat_v the_o morning_n sermon_n at_o noon_n and_o the_o evening_n sermon_n at_o night_n so_o that_o i_o can_v the_o readily_o answer_v my_o father_n when_o he_o examine_v i_o and_o then_o i_o learn_v out_o of_o a_o book_n a_o prayer_n for_o morning_n and_o another_o for_o evening_n this_o course_n i_o continue_v for_o nine_o or_o ten_o year_n together_o so_o that_o at_o length_n i_o attain_v to_o repeat_v to_o myself_o the_o substance_n of_o some_o sermon_n which_o i_o have_v hear_v seven_o or_o eight_o year_n before_o and_o the_o lord_n lead_v i_o on_o in_o this_o orderly_a way_n i_o know_v not_o how_o without_o the_o advice_n or_o direction_n of_o any_o person_n upon_o earth_n whereby_o i_o hope_v to_o work_v out_o my_o salvation_n and_o redeem_v my_o time_n but_o this_o i_o must_v say_v from_o this_o form_n i_o learn_v much_o of_o god_n and_o goodness_n and_o what_o i_o do_v at_o first_o for_o fear_n of_o hell_n at_o last_o i_o perform_v out_o of_o love_n to_o heaven_n yea_o out_o of_o love_n to_o god_n and_o christ_n as_o if_o it_o be_v without_o â—eaven_n i_o use_v this_o method_n some_o year_n after_o i_o come_v to_o the_o university_n of_o cambridg_n whereby_o i_o be_v enable_v to_o recollect_v several_a man_n sermon_n 10_o year_n after_o they_o be_v preach_v and_o likewise_o with_o god_n assistance_n to_o preach_v myself_o at_o 18._o or_o 19_o year_n of_o age_n to_o the_o great_a wonder_n of_o many_o thus_o you_o hear_v how_o formal_a i_o be_v and_o i_o must_v needs_o confess_v it_o be_v more_o out_o of_o fear_n than_o love_v that_o i_o maintain_v this_o strictness_n in_o the_o duty_n of_o religion_n but_o not_o long_o after_o i_o be_v further_o awaken_v by_o my_o own_o father_n mr._n n._n r._n minister_n in_o essex_n who_o preach_v upon_o the_o good_a samaritan_n and_o show_v christ_n compassion_n to_o wound_a soul_n he_o in_o reproof_n of_o sinner_n declare_v that_o they_o be_v more_o guilty_a than_o the_o hard-hearted_a jew_n that_o they_o crucify_v christ_n afresh_o and_o have_v no_o compassion_n on_o he_o now_o he_o be_v in_o glory_n but_o spit_v on_o he_o and_o make_v he_o suffer_v and_o that_o his_o blood_n will_v rise_v up_o in_o judgement_n against_o they_o for_o if_o abel_n a_o mere_a man_n do_v so_o much_o more_o he_o and_o if_o david_n pray_v to_o be_v deliver_v from_o blood_n guiltiness_n how_o ought_v we_o to_o beg_v of_o god_n to_o be_v free_v from_o be_v guilty_a of_o the_o precious_a blood_n of_o the_o son_n of_o god_n and_o saviour_n of_o the_o world_n this_o he_o preach_v and_o press_v so_o powerful_o that_o i_o be_v throw_v into_o a_o tremble_a as_o lie_v under_o the_o guilt_n of_o christ_n blood_n and_o be_v long_o perplex_v with_o the_o horror_n thereof_o one_o remarkable_a passage_n i_o must_v never_o forget_v which_o happen_v in_o my_o youth_n that_o be_v one_o time_n play_v and_o run_v about_o my_o father_n house_n with_o my_o other_o companion_n i_o know_v not_o upon_o what_o occaon_n i_o utter_v vain_a word_n cry_v o_o lord_n which_o we_o be_v not_o suffer_v to_o do_v whereupon_o my_o heart_n be_v instant_o smite_v and_o i_o be_v sudden_o set_v a_o run_v by_o i_o know_v not_o what_o power_n or_o spirit_n as_o if_o i_o have_v be_v possess_v and_o can_v not_o possible_o stay_v myself_o till_o i_o be_v carry_v with_o much_o violence_n to_o a_o little_a gate_n way_n where_o to_o my_o apprehension_n i_o perceive_v as_o plain_o as_o ere_o i_o see_v any_o thing_n by_o the_o sunshine_n a_o naked_a sword_n
few_o that_o see_v i_o in_o those_o headlong_a distemper_n do_v think_v i_o at_o the_o best_a fit_a for_o any_o place_n but_o bedlam_n or_o do_v believe_v i_o shall_v ever_o be_v restore_v to_o what_o i_o be_o and_o this_o be_v also_o very_o strange_o for_o as_o my_o distract_a fit_n abate_v they_o then_o turn_v more_o to_o inward_a malady_n and_o melancholy_a so_o that_o i_o continual_o cry_v out_o i_o be_o damn_a i_o be_o damn_a i_o be_o sure_a i_o can_v be_v save_v it_o be_v impossible_a oh_o i_o have_v hell_n hell_n fire_n about_o i_o the_o devil_n be_v tear_v i_o and_o i_o think_v i_o hear_v the_o damn_a roar_a and_o rave_v and_o see_v 〈◊〉_d be_v it_o be_v roast_v and_o fry_v in_o bla_a torment_n and_o my_o whole_a soul_n be_v swallow_v up_o with_o their_o howl_n and_o screeching_n in_o this_o deplorable_a condition_n i_o lay_v several_a day_n and_o night_n until_o at_o length_n i_o be_v full_o persuade_v and_o convince_v that_o there_o be_v a_o god_n that_o this_o god_n be_v righteous_a and_o that_o he_o will_v hear_v my_o prayer_n if_o i_o continue_v call_v upon_o he_o and_o cry_v to_o he_o with_o importunity_n without_o cease_v see_v the_o unjust_a judge_n that_o we_o read_v of_o in_o scripture_n be_v prevail_v upon_o by_o the_o importunity_n of_o the_o poor_a widow_n hereupon_o have_v gather_v together_o those_o scatter_a relic_n of_o reason_n that_o be_v leave_v i_o i_o take_v up_o a_o resolution_n that_o i_o will_v continue_v in_o prayer_n and_o so_o i_o do_v though_o by_o fit_n i_o be_v froward_a and_o mute_a and_o mild_a and_o i_o know_v not_o how_o sometime_o scarce_o eat_v a_o bit_n of_o bread_n in_o five_o day_n together_o after_o which_o i_o be_v in_o another_o form_n and_o frame_v of_o spirit_n though_o by_o turn_n full_a of_o distraction_n and_o desperate_a thought_n i_o grow_v more_o serious_a and_o begin_v to_o weigh_v thing_n as_o in_o a_o balance_n and_o to_o expostulate_v with_o the_o lord_n and_o to_o pray_v by_o fit_n most_o furious_o and_o now_o and_o then_o the_o tear_n which_o be_v before_o dry_v up_o begin_v to_o trickle_v and_o rowl_n down_o my_o face_n like_o swell_a drop_n of_o blood_n thus_o i_o continue_v three_o or_o four_o day_n till_o one_o afternoon_n come_v into_o the_o chamber_n my_o heart_n be_v as_o big_a and_o full_a as_o it_o can_v hold_v i_o throw_v myself_o flat_a on_o my_o face_n as_o usual_o strike_v on_o the_o board_n and_o cry_v to_o the_o lord_n for_o deliverance_n and_o use_v such_o extravagant_a expression_n as_o may_v discover_v that_o i_o be_v in_o despair_n then_o stand_v up_o i_o walk_v a_o turn_n or_o two_o saying_n be_v there_o not_o a_o god_n be_v he_o gracious_a be_v the_o scripture_n false_a can_v thou_o take_v delight_n to_o see_v a_o poor_a soul_n thus_o set_v on_o the_o rack_n sigh_v and_o roar_v in_o torment_n rise_v up_o and_o appear_v for_o thyself_o thou_o great_a god_n show_v thyself_o gracious_a in_o one_o act_n of_o mercy_n in_o despite_n of_o all_o the_o devil_n in_o hell_n then_o beat_v my_o breast_n and_o tear_v my_o hair_n i_o throw_v myself_o on_o the_o bed_n whilst_o my_o eye_n be_v glaze_v and_o brim_n full_a with_o tear_n there_o i_o lay_v till_o a_o sudden_a sleep_n seize_v upon_o i_o and_o i_o dream_v of_o the_o same_o scripture_n that_o have_v be_v a_o kill_a letter_n to_o i_o which_o now_o through_o the_o spirit_n of_o christ_n quicken_v i_o whereby_o i_o be_v make_v sensible_a that_o christ_n righteousness_n be_v by_o faith_n make_v i_o do_v exceed_v the_o righteousness_n of_o the_o scribe_n and_o pharisee_n and_o that_o except_o i_o in_o and_o by_o the_o righteousness_n of_o christ_n make_v i_o do_v excel_v their_o righteousness_n i_o can_v not_o be_v save_v when_o i_o awake_v i_o be_v so_o much_o change_v that_o i_o be_v amaze_v at_o myself_o at_o the_o suddenness_n of_o it_o for_o i_o dream_v i_o be_v comfort_v and_o that_o my_o heart_n be_v fill_v with_o joy_n and_o when_o i_o awake_v it_o be_v so_o indeed_o i_o start_v up_o and_o rebuke_v myself_o say_v why_o be_o not_o i_o damn_v what_o be_v the_o matter_n why_o be_o i_o so_o fill_v with_o a_o fancy_n and_o with_o a_o sudden_a hope_n of_o i_o know_v not_o what_o nor_o whence_o i_o than_o fall_v to_o pray_v and_o whilst_o i_o be_v pray_v i_o say_v lord_n be_v this_o true_a say_v lord_n be_v it_o true_a if_o it_o be_v so_o discover_v it_o to_o i_o confirm_v i_o in_o it_o at_o length_n i_o be_v persuade_v that_o the_o righteousness_n of_o christ_n be_v i_o that_o this_o garment_n be_v provide_v for_o such_o poor_a naked_a tear_a creature_n as_o i_o be_v whereupon_o i_o take_v the_o bible_n and_o find_v several_a scripture_n which_o seem_v to_o confirm_v the_o same_o to_o i_o and_o i_o be_v ffll_v with_o divine_a infusion_n and_o immediate_a resolution_n agreeable_a to_o the_o will_n of_o god_n give_v out_o there_o and_o then_o i_o begin_v to_o breath_n upon_o it_o and_o pause_v a_o little_a and_o by_o degree_n to_o revive_v and_o look_v up_o with_o some_o hope_n till_o the_o lord_n satisfy_v i_o by_o reveal_v to_o my_o heart_n that_o christ_n righteousness_n be_v my_o only_a justification_n and_o that_o therein_o i_o do_v exceed_v all_o pharisaical_a righteousness_n whereby_o i_o have_v comfortable_a hope_n of_o salvation_n in_o and_o through_o jesus_n christ_n from_o that_o very_o same_o scripture_n which_o do_v before_o condemn_v i_o after_o this_o i_o begin_v plain_o to_o perceive_v why_o my_o myself_o and_o so_o many_o other_o be_v so_o long_o and_o lamentable_o lose_v in_o despair_n that_o it_o be_v because_o we_o seek_v for_o justification_n in_o a_o wrong_a place_n and_o be_v therefore_o in_o the_o wrong_a way_n to_o salvation_n just_a as_o if_o a_o man_n shall_v dig_v in_o his_o garden_n for_o a_o mine_n of_o gold_n no_o wonder_n that_o we_o lose_v our_o labour_n at_o last_o after_o sweat_v tear_n prayer_n care_n pain_n fear_n and_o all_o see_v we_o look_v in_o a_o wrong_a place_n thus_o be_v it_o with_o i_o all_o the_o while_o i_o be_v look_v and_o pore_a and_o perplex_v myself_o for_o a_o righteousness_n of_o my_o own_o and_o to_o seek_v in_o myself_o to_o exceed_v the_o scribe_n and_o pharisee_n alas_o i_o be_v lose_v undo_v and_o can_v not_o find_v it_o nor_o see_v any_o door_n of_o hope_n set_v open_a for_o my_o soul_n till_o christ_n in_o his_o righteousness_n be_v reveal_v in_o i_o and_o then_o i_o know_v he_o to_o be_v a_o saviour_n well_o with_o this_o joy_n i_o have_v continue_v to_o this_o hour_n hold_v and_o keep_v my_o ground_n against_o all_o temptation_n with_o great_a number_n of_o which_o i_o have_v be_v assault_v ever_o since_o and_o such_o as_o have_v be_v scarce_o hear_v of_o for_o after_o i_o have_v solemnize_v and_o celebrate_v my_o new_a life_n begin_v in_o another_o righteousness_n and_o another_o self_n by_o compose_v and_o sing_v of_o psalm_n hymn_n spiritual_a song_n and_o continual_a open-hearted_n return_v of_o praise_n to_o myself_o whilst_o the_o angel_n seem_v to_o rejoice_v with_o i_o yet_o satan_n my_o constant_a and_o unwearied_a enemy_n begin_v now_o to_o muster_v up_o afresh_o more_o trouble_n against_o i_o and_o to_o follow_v i_o with_o a_o host_n of_o affliction_n and_o trial_n as_o pharaoh_n follow_v israel_n with_o a_o purpose_n to_o destroy_v they_o when_o once_o out_o of_o his_o territory_n but_o my_o god_n who_o i_o unfeigned_o serve_v from_o my_o soul_n do_v deliver_v i_o do_v deliver_v i_o and_o i_o trust_v will_v deliver_v i_o as_o the_o apostle_n say_v 1_o cor._n 1._o for_o though_o satan_n lay_v many_o snare_n and_o so_o beset_v i_o about_o that_o it_o seem_v scarce_o possible_a i_o shall_v escape_v yet_o the_o lord_n set_v i_o at_o liberty_n from_o the_o snare_n of_o the_o fowler_n though_o sometime_o so_o subtle_o plant_v that_o i_o can_v not_o discern_v they_o and_o what_o he_o can_v not_o do_v by_o insinuation_n and_o subtlety_n and_o with_o inward_a motion_n and_o temptation_n he_o try_v to_o compass_v by_o violence_n in_o torment_v i_o and_o make_v i_o a_o miserable_a object_n of_o affliction_n and_o sorrow_n for_o now_o my_o friend_n become_v my_o enemy_n and_o my_o preciseness_n be_v a_o eyesore_n to_o many_o my_o near_a relation_n cast_v i_o off_o and_o i_o be_v look_v upon_o as_o disobedient_a for_o keep_v company_n with_o such_o godly_a man_n as_o be_v then_o call_v puritan_n and_o roundhead_n and_o for_o pray_v and_o hold_v communion_n with_o they_o though_o command_v to_o the_o contrary_a at_o length_n i_o find_v so_o little_a love_n from_o some_o and_o so_o much_o malice_n from_o other_o that_o i_o be_v turn_v out_o of_o door_n and_o be_v
know_v more_o this_o dream_n have_v such_o a_o effect_n and_o influence_n upon_o i_o that_o i_o can_v not_o rest_v till_o i_o have_v declare_v it_o and_o now_o i_o find_v my_o heart_n ever_o since_o take_v off_o from_o sin_n and_o the_o lust_n of_o the_o world_n and_o have_v experience_v so_o great_a a_o change_n in_o be_v call_v home_o to_o god_n as_o i_o be_o not_o able_a to_o express_v it_o in_o word_n and_o be_o now_o desirous_a to_o please_v god_n and_o to_o walk_v in_o his_o way_n have_v be_v long_o before_o wrought_v upon_o by_o the_o word_n preach_v and_o by_o prayer_n and_o now_o have_v give_v myself_o up_o to_o god_n in_o who_o mercy_n alone_o through_o the_o merit_n of_o jesus_n christ_n i_o expect_v joy_n and_o peace_n here_o and_o eternal_a happiness_n hereafter_o j._n c._n ix_o experience_n of_o mr._n j.b._n preacher_n of_o the_o gospel_n as_o to_o my_o life_n and_o experience_n i_o must_v declare_v that_o when_o i_o be_v but_o a_o little_a one_o god_n begin_v to_o work_v upon_o i_o for_o go_v to_o school_n i_o once_o happen_v to_o swear_v a_o oath_n as_o i_o be_v play_v with_o my_o companion_n which_o i_o have_v no_o soon_o utter_v but_o i_o be_v instant_o strike_v with_o horror_n for_o it_o and_o the_o sense_n thereof_o be_v so_o terrible_a that_o i_o doubt_v i_o shall_v be_v present_o throw_v into_o hell_n for_o it_o in_o which_o fear_n and_o great_a trouble_n i_o leave_v my_o school_n fellow_n play_v the_o sorrow_n and_o misery_n i_o think_v i_o be_v in_o will_v not_o permit_v i_o to_o stay_v any_o long_o away_o i_o go_v into_o the_o church_n porch_n not_o far_o off_o and_o sit_v down_o alone_o for_o some_o time_n weep_v bitter_o to_o myself_o but_o at_o length_n i_o know_v not_o how_o i_o begin_v to_o have_v some_o hope_n of_o pardon_n and_o thereupon_o grow_v cheerful_a and_o fearless_a till_o a_o while_n after_o i_o go_v to_o see_v some_o malefactor_n execute_v for_o after_o i_o come_v home_o the_o sight_n of_o their_o death_n run_v so_o much_o in_o my_o mind_n and_o appear_v so_o continual_o before_o my_o eye_n that_o my_o sias_fw-la and_o the_o horror_n of_o hell_n come_v fresh_a upon_o i_o again_o so_o that_o i_o be_v exceed_o cast_v down_o and_o cryod_n out_o oh_o what_o shall_v i_o do_v how_o shall_v i_o be_v save_v which_o i_o have_v often_o in_o my_o mouth_n and_o in_o the_o hear_n of_o my_o friend_n in_o this_o condition_n i_o can_v take_v no_o comfort_n from_o they_o till_o the_o lord_n himself_o bring_v i_o out_o of_o it_o and_o incline_v i_o to_o give_v up_o myself_o to_o jesus_n christ_n by_o the_o life_n of_o faith_n which_o i_o now_o live_v notwithstanding_o which_o i_o be_v under_o several_a temptation_n and_o oftentimes_o they_o come_v very_o thick_a upon_o i_o but_o even_o then_o i_o resolve_v that_o if_o i_o be_v throw_v into_o hell_n yet_o i_o will_v still_o lay_v hold_n upon_o my_o lord_n and_o saviour_n jesus_n christ_n and_o will_v never_o let_v he_o go_v and_o upon_o his_o merit_n and_o satisfaction_n i_o have_v be_v establish_v through_o his_o grace_n ever_o since_o so_o that_o i_o take_v christ_n for_o my_o king_n priest_n and_o prophet_n and_o do_v believe_v he_o to_o be_v a_o propitiation_n for_o my_o sin_n and_o my_o portion_n and_o inheritance_n both_o here_o and_o for_o ever_o j._n b._n experience_n of_o vv._n vv._n i_o have_v much_o reason_n to_o acknowledge_v a_o great_a work_n of_o god_n upon_o my_o heart_n in_o deliver_v i_o wonderful_o from_o several_a destroy_a sin_n which_o once_o i_o think_v slight_a but_o be_v real_o so_o great_a that_o i_o can_v scarce_o express_v they_o i_o be_v very_o extravagant_a and_o bring_v very_o low_a both_o in_o body_n and_o mind_n and_o extreme_o sensible_a of_o disobey_v my_o parent_n from_o what_o the_o scripture_n say_v of_o man_n in_o the_o latter_a time_n that_o they_o shall_v be_v lover_n of_o themselves_o heady_a disobedient_a to_o their_o parent_n etc._n etc._n the_o serious_a consideration_n hereof_o cast_v i_o down_o afflict_v my_o conference_n and_o so_o trouble_v i_o that_o i_o be_v altogether_o comfortless_a thus_o i_o continue_v a_o long_a time_n till_o it_o please_v god_n that_o once_o in_o a_o sermon_n i_o hear_v jesus_n câ—rist_n free_o offer_v even_o to_o the_o worst_a of_o sinner_n and_o then_o i_o begin_v to_o look_v up_o a_o little_a with_o hope_n of_o comfort_n and_o apply_v these_o offer_n to_o my_o own_o soul_n be_v sensible_a that_o i_o have_v real_a need_n of_o they_o and_o so_o at_o length_n i_o begin_v to_o be_v satisfy_v with_o peace_n and_o rest_n and_o follow_v the_o hear_n of_o the_o word_n and_o rejoice_v in_o it_o and_o love_v the_o company_n of_o good_a people_n and_o yet_o for_o all_o this_o i_o be_v under_o much_o temptation_n and_o too_o much_o incline_v to_o drink_v till_o my_o brother_n strong_a reprove_v i_o say_v brother_n i_o hear_v strange_a thing_n of_o you_o that_o you_o be_v give_v to_o drink_v this_o so_o smite_v i_o together_o with_o the_o abuse_n i_o receive_v from_o the_o profane_a sort_n who_o cry_v out_o after_o i_o o_o this_o be_v one_o of_o fowler_n be_v follower_n that_o i_o be_v wound_v in_o my_o spirit_n a_o long_a time_n to_o think_v that_o i_o shall_v bring_v such_o a_o scandal_n upon_o the_o gospel_n for_o two_o month_n i_o be_v woeful_o torment_v in_o my_o mind_n till_o the_o lord_n recover_v i_o and_o give_v i_o resolution_n and_o power_n against_o this_o and_o all_o other_o sin_n which_o have_v continue_v with_o i_o ever_o since_o and_o for_o which_o i_o acknowledge_v his_o great_a love_n and_o mercy_n to_o i_o and_o do_v live_v upon_o christ_n the_o true_a messiah_n who_o i_o believe_v to_o have_v die_v for_o my_o sin_n and_o that_o he_o will_v save_v my_o soul_n w._n w._n x._o experience_n of_o m._n k._n when_o i_o take_v a_o view_n of_o my_o life_n upon_o the_o stage_n of_o this_o world_n i_o may_v very_o well_o compare_v it_o to_o a_o tragicomedy_n a_o labyrinth_n from_o one_o sin_n to_o another_o from_o one_o affliction_n to_o another_o i_o be_v indeed_o the_o daughter_n of_o very_a good_a and_o honest_a parent_n who_o diligent_o bring_v up_o their_o child_n in_o the_o fear_n of_o god_n my_o mother_n who_o in_o her_o day_n be_v note_v for_o a_o godly_a virtuous_a and_o religious_a gentlewoman_n she_o i_o say_v from_o among_o twelve_o child_n choose_v i_o to_o set_v her_o love_n and_o affection_n upon_o she_o tell_v i_o it_o be_v because_o she_o see_v something_o a_o more_o tractableness_n and_o and_o diligence_n to_o please_v her_o thâ—n_n in_o the_o rest_n which_o when_o i_o perceive_v as_o than_o not_o be_v seven_o year_n old_a i_o lay_v myself_o forth_o the_o more_o to_o give_v her_o content_n who_o take_v great_a delight_n to_o instruct_v i_o to_o hear_v i_o read_v and_o ask_v her_o question_n she_o allot_v i_o a_o portion_n of_o scripture_n every_o day_n as_o likewise_o a_o part_n of_o erasmus_n rotterdamus_n upon_o the_o four_o evangelist_n wherein_o we_o both_o take_v great_a delight_n about_o that_o time_n i_o have_v serious_a thought_n concern_v god_n the_o father_n son_n and_o holy_a ghost_n who_o put_v this_o part_n of_o scripture_n into_o my_o mind_n he_o that_o be_v ashamed_a of_o i_o before_o man_n of_o he_o will_v i_o be_v ashamed_a before_o my_o father_n which_o be_v in_o heaven_n and_o whoso_o deni_v i_o before_o man_n he_o will_v i_o deny_v before_o the_o angel_n which_o be_v in_o heaven_n i_o than_o begin_v to_o examine_v myself_o on_o this_o manner_n what_o will_v thou_o do_v if_o thou_o be_v tempt_v among_o diversity_n of_o opinion_n to_o be_v ashamed_a of_o this_o profession_n wherein_o thy_o parent_n nurture_v thou_o what_o will_v thou_o do_v if_o thou_o shall_v be_v tempt_v to_o deny_v christ_n and_o be_v call_v to_o suffer_v for_o his_o sake_n as_o some_o of_o thy_o kindred_n be_v in_o queen_n mary_n time_n will_v thou_o not_o deny_v thy_o master_n will_v thou_o not_o run_v away_o from_o thy_o colour_n i_o resolve_v that_o i_o will_v not_o and_o if_o the_o lord_n will_v be_v please_v to_o try_v i_o he_o shall_v see_v how_o valiant_o i_o will_v fight_v under_o his_o banner_n and_o what_o a_o faithful_a soldier_n i_o will_v be_v to_o this_o i_o do_v implore_v his_o help_n continual_o whatsoever_o i_o be_v about_o still_o my_o heart_n be_v pray_v and_o i_o desire_v that_o god_n will_v be_v please_v to_o awake_v i_o in_o the_o night_n that_o i_o may_v rise_v out_o of_o my_o bed_n to_o prayer_n which_o many_o time_n i_o do_v after_o this_o manner_n i_o spend_v my_o day_n until_o i_o be_v twelve_o year_n old_a at_o which_o time_n it_o please_v god_n to_o take_v my_o
death_n that_o i_o shall_v get_v pardon_n i_o have_v no_o soon_o cast_v my_o eye_n upon_o my_o god_n and_o saviour_n but_o i_o be_v dash_v from_o all_o my_o enemy_n satan_n possess_v my_o thought_n suggest_v thus_o unto_o i_o fond_a fool_n quoth_v he_o why_o do_v thou_o thus_o trouble_v thyself_o take_v thy_o pleasure_n do_v what_o thou_o like_v thou_o shall_v never_o be_v call_v to_o a_o account_n for_o any_o thing_n for_o as_o the_o wise_a man_n die_v so_o die_v the_o fool_n and_o both_o rest_n in_o the_o grave_n together_o there_o be_v no_o god_n to_o save_v thou_o or_o to_o punish_v thou_o all_o thing_n be_v make_v by_o nature_n and_o when_o thou_o die_v there_o be_v a_o end_n of_o all_o thy_o good_a and_o bad_a deed_n thou_o talk_v of_o the_o scripture_n and_o of_o a_o god_n and_o of_o a_o jesus_n which_o thou_o have_v hear_v of_o there_o see_v thy_o simplicity_n now_o how_o can_v thou_o prove_v the_o scripture_n to_o be_v true_a alas_o they_o be_v make_v by_o man_n invention_n there_o be_v no_o hold_n for_o thou_o to_o take_v there_o thus_o be_v unquiet_a i_o spend_v my_o day_n and_o night_n in_o tear_n and_o sigh_n and_o groan_n sometime_o think_v with_o myself_o if_o i_o shall_v be_v save_v why_o be_o i_o thus_o then_o again_o conclude_v that_o there_o be_v no_o heaven_n no_o god_n no_o jesus_n no_o good_a angel_n only_o a_o hell_n there_o be_v and_o devil_n to_o carry_v i_o thither_o who_o wait_v in_o every_o corner_n and_o behind_o every_o door_n to_o snatch_v i_o away_o and_o i_o see_v there_o be_v no_o remedy_n but_o the_o more_o i_o strive_v the_o fast_o i_o stick_v i_o faint_v and_o lay_v down_o my_o arm_n and_o cowardly_o yield_v to_o the_o enemy_n argue_v with_o myself_o if_o i_o be_o a_o firebrand_n of_o hell_n a_o child_n of_o perdition_n a_o limb_n of_o satan_n and_o my_o portion_n be_v to_o be_v with_o the_o devil_n and_o his_o angel_n why_o live_v i_o long_o upon_o the_o earth_n why_o go_v i_o not_o to_o my_o own_o place_n thus_o content_a to_o perish_v i_o wander_v about_o the_o space_n of_o half_a a_o year_n no_o man_n nor_o woman_n be_v privy_a to_o nor_o know_v the_o least_o of_o all_o my_o thought_n at_o length_n conclude_v that_o the_o night_n ensue_v will_v be_v my_o last_o night_n that_o i_o shall_v stay_v here_o on_o earth_n as_o one_o desire_v to_o be_v at_o home_n i_o careless_o leave_v my_o family_n and_o go_v to_o bed_n as_o it_o be_v invite_v the_o devil_n to_o come_v and_o take_v their_o due_n but_o mark_v i_o pray_v you_o the_o goodness_n of_o our_o god_n who_o be_v with_o i_o all_o this_o while_n and_o i_o be_v not_o aware_a of_o it_o for_o even_o that_o same_o night_n the_o little_a dog_n leap_v upon_o the_o bed_n i_o think_v it_o be_v the_o devil_n who_o be_v come_v to_o fetch_v i_o away_o i_o scream_v forth_o aloud_o but_o when_o i_o perceive_v it_o be_v the_o dog_n and_o not_o the_o devil_n i_o begin_v to_o think_v thut_n sure_o there_o be_v a_o god_n that_o have_v preserve_v i_o all_o this_o while_n in_o a_o most_o grievous_a agony_n i_o spend_v that_o night_n weep_v and_o although_o it_o be_v winter_n yet_o i_o sweat_v that_o the_o water_n run_v from_o off_o every_o part_n of_o my_o body_n be_v in_o this_o sad_a condition_n i_o think_v it_o be_v not_o right_a but_o sure_o some_o mean_n may_v be_v use_v to_o get_v out_o of_o it_o and_o rise_v the_o more_o early_o in_o the_o morning_n go_v up_o into_o the_o high_a room_n that_o be_v in_o the_o house_n and_o look_v forth_o at_o the_o window_n to_o see_v if_o i_o can_v see_v god_n there_o i_o behold_v the_o tree_n to_o grow_v the_o bird_n to_o fly_v the_o heaven_n how_o they_o hang_v and_o all_o thing_n that_o be_v before_o i_o than_o i_o think_v they_o can_v not_o make_v themselves_o no_o more_o than_o i_o can_v make_v myself_o and_o that_o we_o must_v needs_o have_v a_o maker_n and_o this_o maker_n must_v be_v strong_a and_o powerful_a then_o i_o fall_v down_o upon_o my_o knee_n cry_v out_o in_o this_o manner_n o_o god_n if_o there_o be_v a_o god_n show_v thyself_o to_o i_o a_o poor_a miserable_a wretch_n that_o i_o be_o at_o the_o point_n to_o perish_v then_o i_o think_v i_o see_v the_o lord_n but_o with_o a_o frown_a countenance_n he_o look_v upon_o i_o as_o if_o he_o have_v say_v thou_o have_v displease_v i_o and_o i_o will_v not_o hear_v thou_o and_o turn_v his_o back_n go_v from_o i_o which_o sight_n be_v as_o a_o dart_n thrust_v through_o my_o soul_n for_o the_o space_n of_o half_a a_o hour_n divers_a thought_n enter_v into_o my_o heart_n but_o before_o i_o rise_v from_o off_o my_o knee_n i_o resolve_v to_o become_v a_o earnest_a suitor_n to_o he_o and_o not_o to_o do_v any_o thing_n more_o that_o shall_v displease_v he_o hope_v that_o he_o will_v be_v entreat_v for_o that_o which_o be_v pass_v but_o now_o i_o beseech_v you_o godly_a christian_n to_o take_v notice_n of_o the_o wonderful_a working_n of_o our_o good_a god_n who_o judgement_n be_v unsearchable_a and_o his_o way_n past_o find_v out_o he_o have_v call_v many_o time_n at_o the_o door_n of_o my_o heart_n and_o have_v but_o small_a and_o slight_a entertainment_n but_o now_o he_o come_v violent_o and_o powerful_o to_o take_v possession_n of_o his_o own_o and_o set_v i_o about_o his_o work_n in_o myself_o then_o i_o begin_v to_o think_v what_o i_o shall_v do_v and_o whether_o i_o shall_v go_v to_o pacify_v the_o wrath_n of_o this_o terrible_a and_o dreadful_a god_n by_o who_o providence_n i_o be_v bring_v to_o a_o church_n in_o westminster_n where_o mr._n dod_n a_o very_a godly_a and_o reverend_a divine_a be_v preach_v a_o funeral_n sermon_n i_o go_v in_o hope_v to_o hear_v some_o comfort_n give_v attentive_a heed_n his_o text_n be_v with_o my_o dead_a body_n they_o shall_v arise_v see_v here_o my_o god_n do_v not_o only_o make_v a_o scourge_n of_o small_a cord_n and_o whip_v out_o the_o buyer_n and_o seller_n but_o he_o do_v over-turn_a and_o overturn_v and_o overturn_v for_o this_o minister_n do_v not_o only_o preach_v to_o the_o people_n but_o show_v i_o as_o it_o be_v in_o a_o look_a glass_n my_o own_o condition_n and_o tell_v i_o that_o by_o the_o gate_n of_o hell_n many_o time_n god_n be_v please_v to_o bring_v his_o servant_n to_o heaven_n be_v hungry_a and_o thirsty_a i_o be_v glad_a of_o a_o little_a food_n and_o present_o catch_v hold_v of_o that_o word_n be_v it_o so_o think_v i_o then_o there_o be_v comfort_n for_o i_o i_o will_v about_o my_o work_n if_o it_o please_v god_n to_o assist_v i_o in_o his_o sermon_n he_o ask_v divers_a question_n to_o which_o my_o heart_n make_v answer_v so_o that_o i_o come_v home_o joyful_a long_v to_o hear_v more_o of_o his_o doctrine_n which_o fall_v out_o as_o if_o it_o have_v be_v on_o purpose_n for_o my_o sake_n so_o that_o for_o a_o month_n or_o five_o week_n i_o hear_v two_o three_o four_o or_o five_o sermon_n from_o he_o constant_o every_o week_n wherein_o he_o bid_v i_o try_v and_o prove_v whether_o i_o have_v faith_n or_o no_o whether_o i_o do_v hate_v my_o sin_n or_o no_o and_o what_o have_v be_v the_o sign_n and_o fruit_n thereof_o he_o likewise_o bid_v i_o search_v the_o scripture_n for_o they_o be_v true_a and_o compare_v my_o condition_n with_o the_o child_n of_o god_n there_o but_o after_o he_o be_v sensible_a of_o my_o condition_n which_o i_o make_v know_v to_o he_o private_o he_o be_v very_o laborious_a to_o bring_v my_o soul_n out_o of_o the_o jaw_n of_o death_n and_o to_o raise_v it_o up_o to_o jesus_n christ_n for_o which_o pain_n i_o hope_v my_o god_n will_v reward_v he_o to_o his_o everlasting_a comfort_n but_o one_o thing_n i_o have_v almost_o forget_v when_o i_o be_v in_o the_o depth_n of_o my_o spiritual_a dejection_n i_o be_v utter_o deny_v all_o outward_a comfort_n my_o god_n hide_v his_o face_n i_o be_v trouble_v the_o sun_n the_o moon_n and_o the_o star_n seem_v in_o their_o course_n to_o fight_v against_o i_o my_o neighbour_n fall_v out_o with_o i_o and_o mock_v i_o my_o kindred_n desert_v i_o my_o captain_n christ_n offend_v make_v i_o run_v the_o gauntlet_n and_o every_o soldier_n have_v a_o lash_n at_o i_o whatsoever_o happen_v unto_o i_o bring_v sorrow_n to_o my_o heart_n but_o when_o i_o be_v persuade_v that_o the_o scripture_n be_v true_a i_o set_v myself_o to_o search_v they_o to_o see_v what_o comfort_n i_o can_v find_v there_o beginning_n at_o the_o alpha_n of_o genesis_n i_o find_v in_o the_o beginning_n god_n create_v the_o heaven_n and_o the_o earth_n and_o all_o therein_o well_o
the_o shape_n of_o it_o i_o declare_v unto_o they_o as_o before_o and_o they_o tell_v i_o that_o it_o be_v jesus_n christ_n that_o have_v appear_v in_o the_o shape_n of_o a_o child_n and_o that_o he_o have_v overcome_v death_n and_o hell_n for_o i_o then_o i_o cry_v out_o and_o say_v bless_a be_v jesus_n christ_n for_o evermore_o and_o do_v entreat_v those_o people_n that_o be_v there_o with_o my_o father_n that_o they_o will_v go_v to_o prayer_n for_o i_o that_o those_o comfortable_a revelation_n which_o i_o have_v see_v and_o my_o faith_n in_o christ_n may_v never_o depart_v from_o i_o yet_o for_o three_o year_n after_o i_o have_v many_o ebbing_n and_o flow_n and_o much_o fear_v possess_v i_o so_o that_o satan_n will_v tell_v i_o i_o be_v more_o afraid_a of_o hell_n than_o of_o offend_a god_n but_o i_o bold_o sit_v up_o in_o my_o bed_n and_o tell_v satan_n he_o be_v a_o liar_n and_o that_o i_o will_v rather_o be_v damn_v than_o deny_v jesus_n christ_n and_o so_o christ_n do_v appear_v very_o comfortable_o to_o i_o and_o have_v and_o do_v deliver_v i_o out_o of_o many_o trouble_v very_o often_o and_o how_o to_o speak_v of_o they_o i_o know_v no_o end_n yet_o satan_n like_o a_o cunning_a sophister_n have_v be_v tamper_n with_o i_o to_o despair_v of_o christ_n but_o it_o please_v the_o lord_n to_o bring_v many_o promise_n into_o my_o mind_n and_o the_o example_n also_o of_o mary_n magdalen_n and_o of_o the_o woman_n of_o canaan_n believe_v that_o as_o jesus_n christ_n be_v gracious_a to_o they_o so_o he_o will_v also_o be_v to_o i_o and_o christ_n have_v often_o time_n reveal_v unto_o i_o that_o his_o grace_n be_v sufficient_a for_o i_o as_o he_o say_v unto_o paul_n i_o can_v speak_v but_o little_a of_o jesus_n christ_n but_o yet_o i_o be_o full_o persuade_v in_o my_o soul_n that_o i_o shall_v think_v myself_o very_o happy_a even_o to_o give_v my_o life_n for_o the_o glory_n and_o honour_n of_o his_o name_n if_o the_o lord_n will_v count_v i_o but_o worthy_a of_o such_o a_o favour_n and_o i_o will_v not_o for_o all_o the_o kingdom_n in_o the_o world_n and_o the_o pomp_n thereof_o be_v in_o such_o a_o condition_n again_o and_o now_o my_o soul_n do_v desire_v to_o give_v up_o itself_o unto_o god_n and_o to_o walk_v in_o the_o strict_a course_n that_o his_o word_n do_v prescribe_v e._n r._n xii_o experience_n of_o t._n m._n about_o the_o fourteen_o year_n of_o my_o age_n i_o be_v put_v out_o to_o be_v a_o aprentice_n but_o be_v place_v with_o a_o master_n in_o who_o i_o see_v little_a of_o god_n his_o way_n be_v contrary_a to_o the_o way_n of_o god_n which_o be_v a_o great_a trouble_n to_o my_o spirit_n and_o the_o more_o because_o some_o rude_a people_n drink_v swear_v and_o be_v very_a debauch_a with_o he_o three_o or_o four_o year_n after_o there_o grow_v great_a dispute_n among_o some_o person_n about_o episcopacy_n presbytery_n independency_n and_o the_o like_a which_o make_v i_o question_n with_o my_o own_o thought_n which_o be_v the_o true_a way_n to_o worship_n god_n i_o apply_v myself_o to_o mr._n t._n the_o minister_n and_o other_o yet_o be_v not_o satisfy_v but_o after_o great_a perplexity_n of_o spirit_n i_o meditate_a with_o myself_o and_o wonder_v what_o will_v be_v the_o end_n of_o my_o trouble_n for_o they_o have_v be_v many_o especial_o temptation_n to_o despair_v of_o salvation_n but_o afterward_o be_v return_v back_o from_o my_o master_n to_o my_o father_n house_n lie_v down_o once_o upon_o a_o bench_n i_o fall_v asleep_a and_o dream_v that_o i_o be_v in_o a_o green_a meadow_n where_o i_o see_v various_a form_n of_o creature_n some_o furious_a other_o very_a please_a yet_o all_o of_o they_o seem_v monstruous_a and_o change_v their_o shape_n often_o and_o behold_v myself_o alone_a in_o the_o midst_n of_o they_o i_o be_v grievous_o trouble_v and_o then_o there_o seem_v to_o appear_v a_o great_a red_a dragon_n before_o it_o come_v at_o i_o i_o think_v a_o little_a child_n be_v put_v in_o my_o arm_n which_o be_v so_o beautiful_a and_o comely_a that_o i_o admire_v it_o and_o be_v so_o take_v with_o behold_v it_o that_o it_o put_v the_o fear_n of_o the_o dragon_n for_o the_o present_a out_o of_o mind_n but_o the_o dragon_n afterward_o draw_v near_o and_o sore_o affright_v i_o but_o both_o myself_o and_o the_o child_n be_v take_v away_o and_o carry_v up_o a_o hill_n and_o the_o dragon_n pursue_v we_o and_o be_v often_o ready_a to_o fall_v in_o run_v up_o the_o hill_n i_o fear_v that_o the_o dragon_n will_v catch_v i_o but_o my_o strength_n be_v come_v to_o i_o i_o get_v up_o to_o the_o top_n of_o the_o hill_n and_o the_o dragon_n make_v up_o after_o i_o when_o i_o be_v get_v up_o to_o the_o top_n there_o appear_v a_o brightness_n from_o heaven_n which_o gush_v forth_o like_o a_o stash_n of_o lightning_n and_o split_v the_o dragon_n in_o piece_n at_o which_o i_o rejoice_v exceed_o then_o the_o child_n be_v put_v into_o my_o arm_n again_o and_o i_o ask_v it_o what_o be_v its_o name_n it_o iay_v emanuel_n i_o ask_v who_o be_v its_o father_n it_o say_v i_o be_o i_o ask_v who_o be_v its_o mother_n it_o say_v eternity_n i_o ask_v from_o whence_o he_o come_v he_o say_v from_o my_o father_n out_o of_o heaven_n i_o ask_v to_o who_o he_o come_v and_o what_o be_v his_o errand_n here_o he_o say_v to_o save_v that_o which_o be_v lose_v and_o return_v again_o i_o ask_v he_o if_o he_o will_v dwell_v with_o i_o while_o he_o stay_v he_o say_v he_o can_v not_o be_v detain_v according_a to_o that_o frame_n and_o figure_n he_o be_v in_o but_o after_o death_n he_o will_v dwell_v with_o i_o in_o another_o frame_n the_o thought_n of_o death_n grieve_v i_o but_o the_o child_n bid_v i_o not_o to_o weep_v at_o it_o for_o in_o this_o world_n that_o which_o be_v beauty_n must_v be_v destroy_v and_o that_o which_o be_v contemptible_a must_v be_v exalt_v i_o than_o see_v myself_o very_o contemptible_a and_o poor_a and_o trouble_v and_o in_o these_o thought_n the_o child_n be_v take_v away_o from_o i_o then_o my_o father_n come_v into_o the_o room_n make_v a_o noise_n whereat_o i_o awake_v much_o distract_v and_o trouble_v in_o my_o thought_n and_o so_o perplex_v that_o i_o know_v not_o what_o to_o do_v and_o the_o more_o by_o seek_v to_o understand_v what_o i_o have_v see_v because_o i_o know_v not_o how_o to_o be_v satisfy_v in_o some_o doubt_n that_o lay_v very_o sad_a and_o heavy_a upon_o my_o soul_n but_o i_o have_v since_o find_v much_o comfort_n out_o of_o god_n word_n where_o christ_n say_v come_v unto_o i_o all_o you_o that_o be_v weary_a and_o heavy_a lade_v and_o i_o will_v give_v you_o rest_n and_o the_o lord_n say_v i_o have_v call_v thou_o by_o name_n and_o again_o he_o say_v in_o another_o place_n i_o will_v bear_v in_o thou_o a_o poor_a and_o afflict_a people_n and_o they_o shall_v serve_v i_o and_o in_o esay_n he_o say_v i_o will_v gather_v my_o lamb_n with_o my_o arm_n and_o gentle_o lead_v those_o that_o be_v with_o young_a and_o then_o he_o have_v promise_v that_o he_o will_v never_o lay_v more_o upon_o his_o people_n than_o he_o will_v enable_v they_o to_o bear_v and_o i_o have_v these_o effect_n of_o my_o faith_n 1._o my_o heart_n be_v lead_v out_o to_o love_n god_n who_o be_v eternal_a and_o invisible_a and_o incomprehensible_a i_o love_v he_o in_o all_o his_o dispensation_n towards_o i_o and_o in_o the_o mean_a creature_n though_o never_o so_o despise_v i_o desire_v to_o own_o god_n where_o ever_o i_o see_v he_o 2._o i_o find_v my_o heart_n very_o full_a in_o duty_n yet_o i_o have_v be_v sometime_o trouble_v by_o some_o choleric_a distemper_n that_o have_v transport_v i_o in_o some_o dispute_n which_o i_o be_o very_o sorry_a for_o and_o resolve_v to_o leave_v 3._o i_o love_v the_o lord_n who_o have_v hear_v my_o prayer_n and_o now_o at_o last_o satisfy_v i_o in_o every_o scruple_n of_o my_o conscience_n 4._o my_o desire_n be_v to_o walk_v according_a to_o the_o rule_n of_o the_o gospel_n all_o the_o day_n of_o my_o life_n t._n m._n xiii_o experience_n of_o j._n h._n many_o year_n ago_o i_o have_v some_o yerning_n after_o the_o truth_n of_o jesus_n christ_n and_o be_v in_o the_o country_n and_o hear_v mr._n young_a a_o minister_n in_o leicestershire_n preach_v twice_o a_o day_n the_o word_n wrought_v so_o on_o my_o heart_n that_o i_o take_v great_a delight_n to_o hear_v he_o but_o be_v jeer_v by_o the_o people_n for_o a_o puritan_n i_o do_v leave_v off_o hear_v for_o a_o time_n and_o be_v in_o the_o town_n near_o mr._n young_a sometime_o as_o i_o go_v abroad_o i_o
christ_n if_o he_o abide_v in_o i_o and_o i_o in_o he_o i_o shall_v do_v all_o thing_n m._n w._n xvi_o experience_n of_o i._o i._n when_o i_o be_v in_o the_o midst_n of_o my_o wealth_n and_o worldly_a enjoyment_n i_o be_v vain_a covetous_a and_o whole_o have_v my_o heart_n take_v up_o with_o the_o thing_n of_o the_o world_n little_a or_o nothing_o mind_v the_o thing_n of_o god_n or_o think_v of_o a_o change_n but_o go_v on_o in_o presumption_n put_v the_o evil_a day_n far_o off_o minidng_v only_o for_o the_o present_a what_o please_v the_o flesh_n until_o about_o eight_o year_n since_o i_o have_v many_o outward_a cross_n befall_v i_o and_o be_v in_o some_o want_n and_o then_o be_v under_o that_o dispensation_n i_o be_v much_o trouble_v and_o full_a of_o grief_n i_o seek_v to_o the_o lord_n and_o beg_v deliverance_n from_o my_o affliction_n and_o distress_n as_o to_o outward_a want_n but_o have_v not_o a_o heart_n to_o consider_v what_o be_v the_o cause_n or_o to_o seek_v out_o the_o mind_n of_o god_n in_o it_o until_o i_o hear_v dr._n holmes_n show_v sin_n to_o be_v the_o cause_n of_o all_o our_o cross_n the_o consideration_n hereof_o do_v come_v close_o unto_o my_o spirit_n and_o i_o have_v a_o clear_a conviction_n of_o my_o vanity_n and_o foolish_a dote_a on_o worldly_a thing_n which_o have_v just_o provoke_v the_o lord_n i_o hope_v for_o my_o good_a to_o lay_v those_o cross_n upon_o i_o which_o though_o they_o be_v for_o a_o time_n bitter_a yet_o god_n have_v since_o sweeten_v but_o my_o sorrow_n be_v then_o double_v and_o i_o be_v deject_v not_o only_o for_o my_o outward_a cross_n but_o more_o especial_o for_o my_o carnal_a heart_n and_o vain_a conversation_n whereby_o i_o have_v stir_v up_o the_o anger_n of_o the_o lord_n against_o i_o i_o go_v to_o the_o ordinance_n hope_v to_o find_v comfort_n from_o the_o word_n but_o the_o weight_n of_o my_o sin_n and_o my_o suffering_n so_o press_v i_o down_o that_o i_o find_v much_o heaviness_n my_o sin_n especial_o lay_v heavy_a upon_o i_o and_o i_o see_v little_a hope_n of_o comfort_n yet_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o work_v in_o my_o heart_n a_o loathe_n of_o sin_n as_o well_o as_o trouble_v for_o the_o affliction_n it_o have_v bring_v upon_o i_o but_o about_o a_o year_n since_o i_o hear_v master_n w._n prove_v by_o scripture_n in_o a_o sermon_n very_o effectual_a to_o my_o comfort_n that_o those_o who_o have_v be_v the_o great_a of_o sinner_n if_o they_o do_v hearty_o and_o real_o repent_v and_o turn_v to_o god_n by_o faith_n in_o christ_n and_o lead_v a_o new_a life_n the_o lord_n will_v receive_v they_o to_o mercy_n hereupon_o i_o argue_v with_o my_o soul_n that_o though_o i_o have_v be_v a_o great_a sinner_n yet_o the_o lord_n have_v bring_v my_o heart_n to_o a_o loathe_n of_o those_o sin_n i_o love_v and_o of_o all_o sin_n and_o to_o turn_v to_o the_o lord_n and_o sincere_o to_o desire_v to_o serve_v he_o that_o therefore_o there_o be_v hope_n of_o mercy_n for_o i_o i_o hear_v mr._n w._n mr._n m._n and_o other_o and_o frequent_v divers_a meeting_n where_o i_o find_v much_o comfort_n those_o several_a place_n of_o scripture_n in_o which_o i_o chief_o find_v comfort_n from_o the_o promise_v of_o god_n be_v matth._n 11.28_o 29_o 30._o where_o christ_n say_v come_v unto_o i_o all_o you_o that_o labour_n and_o be_v heavy_a lade_v and_o i_o will_v give_v you_o rest_n take_v my_o yoke_n upon_o you_o and_o learn_v of_o i_o for_o i_o be_o meek_a and_o lowly_a in_o heart_n and_o you_o shall_v find_v rest_n unto_o your_o soul_n for_o my_o yoke_n be_v easy_a and_o my_o burden_n light_n this_o make_v i_o to_o hope_n that_o as_o the_o lord_n have_v give_v i_o a_o heavy_a heart_n lade_v with_o the_o sense_n of_o sin_n so_o christ_n jesus_n will_v give_v i_o comfort_n for_o in_o the_o 12_o verse_n of_o the_o same_o chapter_n it_o be_v say_v a_o hruised_a reed_n shall_v he_o not_o break_v and_o and_o smoke_a flax_n shall_v he_o not_o quench_v and_o though_o i_o have_v dishonour_v christ_n yet_o i_o have_v not_o blaspheme_v the_o holyghost_n and_o therefore_o have_v encouragement_n to_o believe_v from_o the_o word_n of_o christ_n luke_n 12.10_o whosoever_o shall_v speak_v a_o word_n against_o the_o son_n of_o man_n it_o shall_v be_v forgive_v he_o but_o unto_o he_o that_o blaspheme_v against_o the_o holy_a ghost_n it_o shall_v not_o be_v forgive_v i_o be_v comfort_v to_o wait_v upon_o the_o lord_n in_o hope_n because_o he_o have_v humble_v my_o soul_n and_o open_v my_o eye_n to_o see_v mercy_n offer_v to_o i_o and_o this_o be_v strengthen_v from_o that_o example_n lament_v 30.20_o to_o verse_n 26._o my_o soul_n have_v they_o still_o in_o remembrance_n and_o be_v humble_v in_o i_o this_o i_o recall_v to_o mind_n theresore_n have_v i_o hope_v it_o be_v the_o lord_n mercy_n that_o we_o be_v not_o consume_v because_o his_o compassion_n fail_v not_o they_o be_v new_a every_o morning_n great_a be_v thy_o faithfulness_n the_o lord_n be_v my_o portion_n say_v my_o soul_n therefore_o will_v i_o hope_v in_o he_o the_o lord_n be_v good_a unto_o they_o that_o wait_v for_o he_o to_o the_o soul_n that_o seek_v he_o i_o be_v much_o encourage_v from_o hence_o to_o seek_v the_o lord_n and_o hope_v in_o his_o mercy_n my_o conscience_n tell_v i_o i_o be_v a_o great_a sinner_n and_o deserve_a death_n and_o hell_n but_o my_o hope_n be_v in_o god_n and_o strengthen_v from_o that_o promise_n ezek._n 18.21_o 22_o 23._o if_o the_o wicked_a will_v turn_v from_o his_o sin_n that_o he_o have_v commit_v and_o keep_v all_o my_o statute_n and_o do_v that_o which_o be_v lawful_a and_o right_a he_o shall_v sure_o live_v he_o shall_v not_o die_v all_o his_o transgression_n that_o he_o have_v commit_v they_o shall_v not_o be_v mention_v unto_o he_o in_o the_o righteousness_n that_o he_o have_v do_v he_o shall_v live_v have_v i_o any_o pleasure_n at_o all_o that_o the_o wicked_a shall_v die_v say_v the_o lord_n god_n and_o not_o that_o he_o shall_v turn_v from_o his_o way_n and_o live_v and_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o put_v into_o my_o spirit_n a_o very_a great_a resolution_n to_o serve_v he_o for_o the_o time_n to_o come_v and_o i_o praise_v my_o god_n i_o have_v have_v since_o much_o joy_n in_o duty_n of_o piety_n and_o much_o sweetness_n from_o the_o word_n of_o god_n and_o gold_o minister_n i_o have_v no_o desire_n to_o enjoy_v the_o pleasure_n and_o vanity_n of_o the_o world_n as_o i_o have_v do_v but_o my_o heart_n now_o take_v delight_n in_o god_n and_o communion_n with_o his_o people_n and_o the_o lord_n have_v give_v i_o a_o heart_n io_o discern_v a_o beauty_n and_o desirableness_n in_o the_o way_n of_o god_n which_o be_v more_o joyful_a to_o i_o now_o than_o ever_o sin_n be_v former_o and_o when_o i_o come_v at_o the_o ordinance_n i_o often_o find_v and_o feel_v such_o heavenly_a refreshment_n from_o the_o lord_n upon_o my_o heart_n that_o it_o make_v i_o exceed_o full_a of_o joy_n there_o be_v such_o a_o love_n upon_o my_o heart_n to_o god_n that_o i_o dare_v not_o willing_o offend_v he_o in_o any_o thing_n i_o rejoice_v to_o hear_v his_o name_n speak_v of_o and_o his_o glory_n exalt_v and_o i_o find_v a_o very_a great_a affection_n draw_v by_o the_o power_n of_o god_n from_o my_o heart_n to_o such_o as_o seem_v to_o be_v his_o people_n j._n j._n xvii_o experience_n of_o e._n c._n about_o nine_o year_n ago_o at_o the_o birth_n of_o a_o child_n i_o have_v very_o great_a temptation_n of_o destroy_v myself_o and_o have_v have_v oftentimes_o a_o knife_n put_v into_o my_o hand_n to_o do_v it_o so_o that_o i_o dare_v not_o be_v leave_v by_o myself_o alone_o and_o when_o i_o have_v consider_v what_o the_o cause_n may_v be_v my_o conscience_n do_v hint_n most_o my_o neglect_v of_o duty_n which_o i_o have_v many_o opportunity_n to_o have_v perform_v they_o be_v the_o ordinance_n of_o god_n thus_o i_o continue_v till_o two_o year_n ago_o i_o bury_v a_o child_n which_o be_v a_o very_a great_a trouble_n to_o i_o to_o part_v with_o and_o then_o be_v i_o more_o full_o convince_v of_o sin_n which_o cause_v my_o burden_n to_o be_v the_o great_a so_o that_o i_o can_v seldom_o have_v any_o other_o thought_n but_o of_o desperation_n but_o the_o lord_n keep_v i_o by_o his_o great_a mercy_n so_o that_o sometime_o i_o can_v pray_v with_o devotion_n and_o discern_v the_o lord_n to_o remove_v this_o great_a trouble_n from_o i_o i_o do_v plain_o find_v that_o those_o great_a temptation_n be_v very_o much_o lessen_v which_o be_v a_o very_a great_a comfort_n unto_o my_o spirit_n but_o yet_o this_o still_o be_v
put_v it_o into_o my_o mind_n that_o christ_n jesus_n have_v not_o give_v so_o much_o for_o soul_n as_o he_o have_v do_v to_o let_v the_o devil_n have_v they_o for_o nothing_o and_o in_o the_o strength_n of_o the_o lord_n i_o repulse_v the_o devil_n say_v satan_n when_o thou_o in_o tempt_a christ_n show_v he_o the_o whole_a world_n thou_o promise_v he_o that_o which_o be_v none_o of_o thou_o own_o nor_o be_o i_o thou_o and_o therefore_o avoid_v satan_n for_o thou_o have_v nothing_o to_o do_v with_o i_o and_o then_o the_o devil_n depart_v from_o i_o then_o my_o heart_n be_v much_o fill_v with_o the_o thought_n of_o the_o goodness_n of_o god_n and_o with_o a_o mixture_n of_o tear_n and_o joy_n i_o have_v sweet_a comfort_n from_o the_o lord_n and_o though_o i_o have_v have_v many_o doubt_n upon_o my_o spirit_n sometime_o yet_o i_o have_v since_o find_v very_o great_a consolation_n through_o faith_n in_o the_o promise_n of_o god_n as_o in_o these_o and_z divers_z other_o matth._n 11.28_o come_v unto_o i_o all_o you_o that_o labour_n and_o be_v heavy_a lade_v and_o i_o will_v give_v you_o rest_n i_o thank_v god_n i_o have_v find_v much_o rest_n and_o refreshment_n by_o come_v to_o christ_n and_o that_o his_o grace_n be_v sufficient_a for_o i_o matth._n 5.6_o bless_a be_v they_o which_o do_v hunger_n and_o thirst_n after_o righteousness_n for_o they_o shall_v be_v fill_v i_o have_v often_o lay_v hold_v on_o this_o promise_n with_o a_o thirst_a desire_n after_o jesus_n christ_n and_o he_o have_v fill_v i_o with_o comfort_n and_o the_o comfort_n wherewith_o christ_n do_v comfort_n peter_n bid_v he_o not_o to_o fear_v for_o he_o have_v pray_v for_o he_o have_v be_v upon_o my_o spirit_n and_o give_v i_o great_a consolation_n in_o that_o i_o know_v christ_n be_v hear_v in_o all_o that_o he_o pray_v to_o the_o father_n and_o i_o find_v the_o testimony_n of_o my_o conversion_n to_o god_n which_o give_v satisfaction_n to_o my_o soul_n that_o i_o be_o a_o true_a believer_n 1._o though_o i_o do_v all_o that_o i_o can_v to_o serve_v god_n as_o he_o have_v command_v i_o yet_o i_o find_v great_a imperfection_n and_o utter_a unworthiness_n in_o myself_o to_o deserve_v any_o thing_n of_o god_n but_o my_o whole_a dependence_n and_o hope_n of_o salvation_n be_v in_o god_n free_a grace_n in_o the_o blood_n and_o merit_n of_o my_o saviour_n jesus_n chrsst_n 2._o i_o do_v find_v that_o the_o love_n of_o god_n in_o christ_n constrain_v i_o to_o love_n god_n again_o above_o all_o thing_n in_o the_o world_n and_o whatever_o i_o be_o about_o my_o soul_n be_v delight_v with_o god_n above_o all_o 3._o i_o find_v that_o the_o lord_n draw_v my_o heart_n to_o hate_v all_o evil_a communication_n and_o evil_a thing_n and_o not_o so_o much_o to_o fear_v the_o punishment_n of_o the_o world_n for_o any_o thing_n as_o to_o sin_n against_o god_n 4._o i_o be_o much_o delight_v in_o the_o working_n of_o god_n spirit_n and_o it_o be_v a_o great_a joy_n and_o comfort_n to_o my_o soul_n when_o my_o heart_n be_v enlarge_v towards_o god_n 5._o my_o heart_n be_v much_o affect_v unto_o ordinance_n and_o if_o satan_n suggest_v worldly_a thought_n to_o hinder_v i_o from_o duty_n i_o have_v call_v upon_o god_n and_o find_v comfort_n and_o when_o i_o have_v come_v to_o duty_n with_o cold_a affection_n i_o have_v be_v much_o refresh_v in_o the_o duty_n &_o though_o sometime_o i_o have_v feel_v pain_n and_o distemper_n in_o my_o body_n which_o i_o have_v thought_n satan_n have_v do_v to_o make_v i_o weary_a in_o duty_n yet_o i_o have_v call_v on_o the_o lord_n and_o find_v comfort_n 6._o i_o find_v great_a peace_n and_o much_o comfort_n in_o the_o lord_n so_o that_o i_o can_v be_v willing_a to_o die_v and_o it_o be_v a_o great_a joy_n to_o i_o in_o that_o i_o expect_v to_o die_v that_o i_o may_v be_v deliver_v from_o the_o affliction_n of_o the_o world_n to_o enter_v into_o eternal_a joy_n with_o christ_n for_o ever_o e._n o._n xxiv_o expeience_n of_o a._n g._n i_o have_v be_v many_o year_n since_o very_o sensible_a of_o my_o natural_a estate_n and_o do_v lie_v long_o under_o the_o sense_n of_o my_o sin_n which_o be_v so_o great_a a_o burden_n to_o i_o that_o they_o make_v i_o almost_o despair_v insomuch_o that_o i_o can_v scarce_o either_o eat_v or_o drink_v but_o have_v my_o spirit_n dry_v up_o with_o the_o anguish_n thereof_o for_o i_o be_v bring_v up_o under_o the_o mean_n and_o from_o a_o child_n frequent_v the_o hear_n of_o the_o word_n and_o the_o first_o cause_n of_o my_o great_a torment_n be_v for_o that_o i_o once_o tell_v a_o lie_n against_o my_o conscience_n which_o so_o lie_v upon_o my_o spirit_n afterward_o that_o i_o can_v receive_v no_o comfort_n i_o go_v to_o hear_v the_o word_n and_o read_v the_o scripture_n yet_o all_o do_v but_o increase_v my_o horror_n several_a minister_n and_o godly_a people_n use_v great_a mean_n to_o comfort_v i_o but_o all_o in_o vain_a for_o a_o time_n and_o when_o i_o read_v the_o scripture_n i_o find_v every_o threaten_n and_o judgement_n therein_o that_o i_o fix_v my_o thought_n upon_o to_o speak_v terror_n to_o my_o soul_n and_o my_o distraction_n be_v so_o great_a that_o my_o friend_n say_v i_o be_v mad_a and_o keep_v the_o bible_n from_o i_o for_o so_o often_o as_o i_o read_v in_o it_o i_o pore_v most_o upon_o that_o dreadful_a place_n matth._n 12.31_o all_o manner_n of_o sin_n and_o blasphemy_n shall_v be_v forgive_v unto_o man_n but_o the_o blasphemy_n against_o the_o holy_a ghost_n shall_v not_o be_v forgive_v unto_o man_n i_o do_v not_o know_v what_o the_o sin_n against_o the_o holy_a ghost_n be_v but_o i_o have_v a_o persuasion_n i_o have_v commit_v that_o sin_n and_o fear_v that_o my_o sin_n can_v not_o be_v pardon_v and_o that_o i_o shall_v never_o go_v to_o heaven_n but_o be_v cast_v off_o to_o the_o damn_a yet_o this_o the_o lord_n wrought_v for_o i_o and_o in_o i_o by_o his_o bless_a spirit_n to_o draw_v forth_o my_o heart_n to_o be_v often_o pray_v in_o that_o poor_a doubt_a way_n my_o spirit_n can_v by_o the_o lord_n assistance_n vouchsafe_v to_o i_o attain_v unto_o for_o though_o i_o think_v it_o in_o vain_a and_o that_o god_n will_v not_o hear_v i_o yet_o i_o continue_v pray_v and_o often_o cry_v to_o god_n not_o only_o in_o the_o day_n time_n but_o frequent_o in_o the_o night_n and_o rise_v out_o of_o my_o bed_n to_o pray_v to_o god_n to_o have_v mercy_n upon_o i_o and_o i_o be_v sometime_o a_o little_a comfort_v in_o that_o i_o be_v persuade_v to_o hope_v in_o the_o lord_n but_o yet_o it_o be_v dash_v again_o through_o fear_n that_o i_o have_v commit_v the_o sin_n against_o the_o holy_a ghost_n and_o i_o think_v that_o all_o victual_n and_o every_o thing_n be_v too_o good_a for_o i_o and_o that_o i_o be_v unworthy_a of_o all_o en_fw-fr oyment_n thus_o i_o lay_v for_o some_o month_n in_o a_o sad_a agony_n wrestle_v with_o temptation_n perplex_v between_o hope_n and_o despair_n but_o at_o last_o in_o hear_v mr._n w._n minister_n of_o b._n and_o read_v a_o book_n call_v the_o new_a birth_n i_o find_v comfort_n be_v better_o satisfy_v what_o the_o sin_n against_o the_o holy_a ghost_n be_v than_o before_o since_o which_o i_o bless_v god_n i_o have_v for_o some_o year_n past_a find_v much_o comfort_n from_o the_o promise_v of_o god_n reveal_v in_o his_o holy_a word_n some_o of_o which_o follow_v matth._n 5.6_o bless_a be_v they_o which_o do_v hunger_n and_o thirst_n after_o righteousness_n for_o they_o shall_v be_v fill_v my_o chief_a desire_n be_v after_o jesus_n christ_n and_o to_o follow_v he_o by_o the_o rule_n of_o the_o gospel_n not_o doubt_v but_o that_o i_o shall_v be_v bless_v in_o that_o grace_n which_o he_o communicate_v to_o i_o from_o his_o fullness_n matth._n 11.28_o come_v unto_o i_o all_o you_o that_o labour_n and_o be_v heavy_a lade_v and_o i_o will_v give_v you_o rest_n this_o promise_n be_v to_o soul_n lade_v with_o dejection_n and_o universal_a to_o all_o that_o come_v to_o christ_n have_v much_o comfort_v my_o heart_n in_o that_o by_o his_o spirit_n he_o have_v draw_v forth_o my_o soul_n to_o come_v to_o he_o and_o as_o a_o testimony_n of_o my_o love_n to_o god_n and_o evidence_n of_o my_o faith_n i_o bless_v god_n i_o have_v these_o comfortable_a fruit_n of_o the_o spirit_n of_o grace_n in_o my_o soul_n 1._o though_o i_o do_v all_o that_o i_o can_v to_o serve_v god_n yet_o in_o all_o thing_n i_o find_v infirmity_n in_o i_o so_o that_o all_o my_o trust_n be_v only_o in_o the_o merit_n of_o my_o saviour_n jesus_n christ_n 2._o though_o i_o can_v be_v so_o holy_a as_o
have_v conference_n with_o many_o of_o the_o people_n of_o god_n both_o preacher_n and_o other_o i_o be_v very_o much_o strengthen_v in_o faith_n and_o have_v a_o assurance_n of_o the_o love_n of_o god_n in_o christ_n jesus_n whereby_o i_o do_v find_v much_o comfort_n to_o my_o soul_n and_o since_o hear_v some_o able_a minister_n of_o the_o gospel_n hold_v forth_o most_o precious_a truth_n i_o find_v much_o comfort_n and_o more_o particular_o mr._n bridges_n of_o yarmouth_n open_v that_o comfortable_a scripture_n psal_n 41.11_o why_o be_v thou_o cast_v down_o o_o my_o soul_n why_o be_v thou_o disquiet_v within_o i_o trust_v in_o god_n etc._n etc._n his_o doctrine_n be_v that_o a_o godly_a man_n have_v no_o just_a cause_n to_o be_v discourage_v whatsoever_o his_o condition_n be_v either_o the_o sense_n of_o sin_n or_o the_o temptation_n of_o satan_n or_o trouble_v or_o affliction_n that_o a_o man_n have_v cause_n to_o be_v humble_v for_o the_o least_o sin_n but_o not_o to_o be_v discourage_v at_o the_o great_a from_o trust_v in_o god_n but_o to_o rely_v upon_o the_o lord_n by_o faith_n in_o christ_n whatsoever_o his_o disincouragement_n be_v which_o have_v since_o cause_v i_o to_o walk_v in_o a_o thankful_a posture_n towards_o god_n for_o his_o unspeakable_a mercy_n and_o it_o be_v my_o great_a grief_n that_o i_o can_v be_v no_o more_o thankful_a see_v i_o have_v receive_v so_o much_o mercy_n from_o god_n who_o i_o do_v daily_o offend_v which_o have_v make_v i_o with_o paul_n to_o cry_v out_o o_o wretched_a man_n that_o i_o be_o who_o shall_v deliver_v i_o from_o this_o body_n of_o death_n but_o that_o the_o next_o word_n produce_v comfort_n bless_a be_v god_n through_o jesus_n christ_n yet_o after_o this_o it_o please_v god_n to_o suffer_v i_o to_o fall_v into_o a_o sinful_a condition_n by_o be_v too_o confident_a in_o my_o own_o strength_n which_o fall_v cost_v i_o abundance_n of_o tear_n sigh_n and_o sobbing_n of_o heart_n even_o as_o david_n say_v to_o the_o break_n and_o dry_v of_o my_o bone_n it_o make_v i_o walk_v sad_o for_o many_o month_n together_o &_o even_o to_o despair_v of_o any_o help_n and_o see_v i_o have_v bring_v so_o much_o dishonour_n to_o god_n and_o scandal_n to_o the_o gospel_n and_o reproach_n to_o the_o professor_n thereof_o this_o do_v much_o press_v my_o soul_n consider_v what_o a_o professor_n i_o be_v before_o in_o stand_v for_o the_o glory_n of_o god_n and_o oppose_v all_o gainsayer_n and_o for_o i_o to_o fall_v oh_o this_o do_v make_v such_o gash_n in_o my_o soul_n that_o the_o consideration_n thereof_o cause_v i_o to_o walk_v sad_o and_o sorrowful_o and_o with_o so_o much_o shame_n that_o i_o can_v not_o endure_v to_o go_v in_o the_o street_n but_o that_o urgent_a ncessity_n force_v i_o to_o go_v out_o for_o comfort_n then_o it_o please_v god_n by_o special_a providence_n to_o cast_v i_o under_o dr._n homes_n his_o ministry_n and_o he_o treat_v on_o that_o subject_n concern_v backsliding_a out_o of_o jer._n 14_o v._n 7._o o_o lord_n though_o our_o iniquity_n testify_v against_o we_o yet_o do_v thou_o it_o for_o thy_o name_n sake_n for_o our_o back_n sliding_n be_v many_o etc._n etc._n which_o sermon_n be_v by_o the_o work_n of_o the_o spirit_n of_o god_n effectual_a unto_o i_o for_o i_o be_v almost_o under_o despair_n before_o but_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o give_v i_o much_o comfort_n from_o this_o doctrine_n that_o saint_n may_v be_v guilty_a of_o many_o backslide_n yet_o they_o shall_v not_o despair_v for_o that_o be_v a_o great_a sin_n the_o doctor_n make_v this_o use_n that_o if_o saint_n may_v break_v their_o peace_n wicked_a and_o unregenerate_a man_n may_v break_v their_o neck_n a_o second_o use_n be_v that_o a_o saint_n shall_v beware_v of_o backslide_v and_o make_v all_o speed_n to_o go_v to_o jesus_n christ_n for_o more_o strength_n to_o keep_v and_o uphold_v he_o for_o the_o future_a this_o do_v give_v i_o some_o comfort_n and_o cause_v i_o to_o set_v upon_o the_o work_n of_o seek_v to_o jesus_n christ_n more_o earnest_o because_o christ_n tell_v paul_n that_o his_o grace_n be_v sufficient_a for_o he_o i_o have_v rest_v in_o that_o little_a mustard-seed-faith_n i_o have_v before_o but_o now_o it_o do_v begin_v to_o spring_v and_o blossom_n to_o the_o praise_n and_o glory_n of_o jesus_n christ_n that_o he_o shall_v as_o it_o be_v snatch_v i_o as_o a_o brand_n out_o of_o those_o burn_n of_o hell_n and_o establish_v my_o poor_a soul_n by_o his_o free_a grace_n to_o see_v all_o my_o iniquity_n lay_v to_o the_o charge_n of_o christ_n as_o isa_n 53._o v._n 5._o all_o we_o like_v sheep_n have_v go_v astray_o we_o have_v turn_v every_o one_o to_o his_o own_o way_n and_o the_o lord_n have_v lay_v on_o he_o the_o iniquity_n of_o we_o all_o which_o scripture_n be_v open_v by_o a_o worthy_a member_n of_o that_o church_n mr._n f._n it_o do_v much_o strengthen_v my_o faith_n in_o the_o application_n when_o i_o come_v to_o consider_v first_o that_o it_o be_v iniquity_n that_o the_o lord_n jehovah_n lay_v on_o christ_n second_o that_o it_o be_v my_o iniquity_n that_o be_v thus_o lay_v on_o he_o three_o that_o it_o be_v the_o lord_n himself_o that_o do_v lay_v it_o on_o he_o and_o four_o that_o the_o lord_n have_v do_v it_o already_o it_o be_v not_o now_o to_o do_v all_o these_o point_n do_v much_o comfort_v i_o see_v they_o be_v back_v by_o scripture_n and_o such_o a_o caution_n give_v by_o the_o apostle_n paul_n heb._n 3.12_o say_n take_v heed_n lest_o there_o be_v find_v in_o you_o a_o evil_a heart_n of_o unbelief_n etc._n etc._n which_o be_v a_o great_a sin_n and_o plague_n to_o any_o poor_a soul_n this_o wrought_v much_o with_o i_o but_o then_o apply_v several_a other_o scripture_n to_o the_o everlasting_a praise_n of_o jehovah_n and_o to_o jesus_n christ_n my_o saviour_n this_o scripture_n be_v produce_v in_o psal_n 68.16_o compare_v with_o the_o apostle_n word_n speak_v of_o christ_n thou_o have_v ascend_v up_o on_o high_a and_o lead_v captivity_n captive_a and_o receive_v gift_n for_o man_n even_o rebellious_a one_o that_o the_o lord_n god_n may_v dwell_v among_o they_o and_o that_o of_o ezek._n 16.7_o 8_o 9_o 10._o a_o precious_a scripture_n for_o trouble_a soul_n to_o be_v meditate_a on_o for_o comfort_n that_o a_o man_n be_v in_o his_o filth_n and_o guilt_n and_o all_o over_o with_o blood_n nay_o when_o no_o eye_n will_v pity_v he_o that_o then_o be_v a_o time_n of_o love_n to_o his_o soul_n oh_o mercy_n and_o free_a grace_n indeed_o then_o again_o consider_v the_o new_a covenant_n to_o open_v blind_a eye_n and_o to_o bring_v prisoner_n out_o of_o prison_n to_o the_o glorious_a light_n and_o liberty_n of_o the_o son_n of_o god_n and_o his_o proclamation_n isa_n 55._o ho_o every_o one_o that_o thirst_v come_v and_o in_o that_o of_o joh._n 6._o five_o 37._o he_o that_o come_v to_o christ_n he_o have_v promise_v in_o no_o wise_a to_o cast_v out_o though_o thy_o sin_n he_o as_o crimson_a and_o scarlet_a yea_o of_o such_o a_o deep_a dye_n as_o that_o with_o paul_n i_o may_v say_v to_o be_v chief_a of_o sinner_n yet_o it_o please_v god_n to_o give_v i_o in_o refreshment_n from_o he_o same_o scripture_n about_o two_o year_n since_o providence_n cast_v my_o lot_n at_o westminster_n where_o i_o hear_v mr._n w._n and_o have_v observe_v many_o honest_a people_n at_o hear_v of_o the_o word_n i_o then_o seek_v to_o the_o lord_n by_o earnest_a prayer_n so_o to_o direct_v i_o by_o his_o bless_a spirit_n that_o my_o only_a aim_n may_v be_v for_o his_o glory_n the_o good_a of_o other_o and_o with_o comfort_n to_o my_o own_o soul_n it_o please_v the_o lord_n to_o direct_v my_o heart_n notwithstanding_o all_o opposition_n of_o satan_n and_o the_o persuasion_n of_o some_o other_o to_o resolve_v and_o to_o break_v through_o all_o opposition_n and_o difficulty_n and_o to_o join_v in_o the_o worship_n of_o the_o lord_n god_n of_o our_o father_n and_o to_o walk_v in_o his_o way_n according_a to_o the_o strict_a rule_n of_o the_o gospel_n of_o jesus_n christ_n hold_v forth_o in_o his_o word_n m._n h._n xxxiv_o experience_n of_o l._n p._n about_o twenty_o year_n since_o i_o be_v then_o with_o child_n be_v much_o trouble_v at_o some_o thought_n which_o god_n put_v into_o my_o mind_n touch_v my_o conversation_n which_o lie_v so_o sore_a and_o heavy_a upon_o i_o that_o i_o can_v not_o tell_v what_o to_o do_v because_o i_o see_v though_o i_o endeavour_v as_o much_o as_o i_o can_v to_o do_v my_o duty_n to_o my_o god_n yet_o i_o be_v not_o able_a to_o live_v as_o i_o shall_v and_o then_o i_o begin_v to_o know_v what_o the_o worm_n of_o conscience_n mean_v i_o
address_n to_o all_o young_a person_n to_o remember_v their_o creator_n in_o the_o day_n of_o their_o youth_n together_o with_o remark_n upon_o the_o live_v of_o several_a excellent_a young_a person_n of_o both_o sex_n a_o well_o ancient_a as_o modern_a who_o have_v be_v famous_a for_o virtue_n and_o piety_n in_o their_o generation_n with_o twelve_o curious_a picture_n illustrate_v the_o several_a history_n price_n 1_o s._n 6_o d._n 34._o the_o vanity_n of_o the_o life_n of_o man_n represent_v in_o the_o seven_o several_a stage_n thereof_o with_o picture_n and_o poem_n expose_v the_o folly_n of_o every_o age._n price_n eight_o penny_n 35_o distress_a zion_n relieve_v or_o the_o garment_n of_o praise_n for_o the_o spirit_n of_o heaviness_n a_o poem_n wherein_o be_v discover_v the_o grand_a cause_n of_o the_o church_n trouble_n and_o misery_n under_o the_o late_a dispensation_n with_o a_o complete_a history_n of_o and_o lamentation_n for_o those_o renown_a worthâ—_n that_o sell_v to_o engâ—and_v by_o popish_a rage_n and_o cruelty_n from_o the_o year_n 1680._o humble_o dedicate_v to_o their_o majesty_n by_o b._n keach_n pr._n 1_o s._n 36._o antichrist_n storm_v or_o the_o church_n of_o rome_n prove_v to_o be_v mystery_n babylon_n the_o great_a wâ—ore_n rev_n 17._o by_o many_o and_o undeniable_a argument_n answer_v all_o the_o objection_n of_o the_o papist_n and_o all_o other_o together_o with_o the_o judgement_n of_o many_o ancient_n and_o modern_a divide_v and_o most_o eminent_a writer_n concern_v the_o rise_n and_o final_a ruin_n of_o the_o beast_n and_o babylon_n prove_v it_o will_v be_v in_o this_o present_a age_n with_o a_o account_n of_o many_o strange_a prediction_n relate_v to_o these_o present_a â—imes_n by_o b._n keach_n price_n one_o shilling_n 37._o the_o devont_a soul_n daily_a exercise_n in_o prayer_n contemplation_n and_o praise_n contain_v devotion_n for_o morning_n noon_n and_o night_n for_o every_o day_n in_o the_o week_n with_o prayer_n before_o and_o after_o the_o holy_a communion_n and_o likewise_o for_o person_n of_o all_o condition_n and_o upon_o all_o occasion_n with_o grace_n and_o thanksgiving_n before_o and_o after_o meat_n by_o r._n p._n d._n d._n price_n bind_v six_o penny_n 38._o sacramental_a meditation_n upon_o divers_a select_a place_n of_o scripture_n wherein_o believer_n be_v assist_v in_o prepare_v their_o heart_n and_o exciting_a their_o affection_n and_o grace_n when_o they_o draw_v nigh_o to_o god_n in_o that_o most_o awful_a and_o solemn_a ordinance_n of_o the_o lord_n supper_n by_o jo._n flavel_n minister_n of_o christ_n in_o devon_n price_n one_o shiâ—ling_n 39_o jacob_n wrestle_a with_o god_n and_o prevail_a or_o a_o treatise_n concern_v the_o necessity_n and_o efficacy_n of_o faith_n in_o prayer_n with_o divers_a weghty_a question_n and_o case_n of_o conscience_n about_o pray_v in_o faith_n be_v state_v and_o resolve_v for_o the_o satisfy_n of_o scrupulous_a conscience_n conviction_n of_o formal_a hypocrite_n awaken_v of_o all_o saint_n both_o weak_a and_o strong_a to_o this_o duty_n of_o prayer_n pr._n 1_o s._n â—0_n the_o true_a light_n shine_v in_o darkness_n and_o dispoâ—ling_v the_o mist_n of_o error_n arise_v from_o the_o darkness_n of_o mâ—n's_n heart_n etc._n etc._n promoted_n by_o the_o prince_n â—_o darkness_n against_o the_o truth_n of_o god_n in_o the_o matter_n of_o ouâ—_n justification_n in_o three_o part_n show_v first_o that_o bâ—_n the_o deed_n of_o the_o law_n or_o man_n be_v own_o righteousness_n nâ—_n flesh_n can_v or_o shall_v be_v justify_v in_o the_o sight_n of_o god_n second_o that_o the_o righteousness_n of_o god_n be_v the_o only_a matter_n of_o our_o justification_n three_o the_o time_n and_o season_n wherein_o god_n do_v justify_v his_o elect._n both_o by_o tho._n taylor_n former_o minister_n to_o a_o congregation_n in_o st._n edmund_n bury_v now_o at_o cambridge_n price_n 1_o s._n two_o penny_n 41._o mercy_n triumphant_a in_o the_o conversion_n of_o sinner_n unto_o god_n be_v a_o account_n of_o the_o remarkable_a experience_n of_o many_o eminent_a christian_n in_o several_a declaration_n make_v by_o they_o upon_o solemn_a occasion_n display_v the_o exceed_a riches_n of_o the_o free_a graâ—â—â—â—d_a love_n of_o god_n in_o support_v they_o under_o violent_a temptation_n and_o the_o trouble_n of_o their_o despair_v conscience_n and_o at_o length_n shilling_n their_o souâ—s_n with_o divine_a consolation_n former_o publish_v by_o divers_a faithful_a minister_n of_o the_o gospel_n in_o and_o about_o london_n and_o now_o revive_v for_o the_o comfort_v of_o poor_a doubt_v believer_n by_o w._n d._n price_n one_o shilling_n all_o print_v for_o nath._n crouch_v at_o the_o bell_n in_o the_o poultry_n near_o cheapside_n finis_fw-la