is but an iâ—lusion the goodliest man a fearefull ghost Shall wee O my God determine our thoughts shal we neuer determin our disputations vpon our Climaclericall yeares for particular men and periodical yeres for the life of states and kingdoms and neuer coÌ„sider these in our long life our interest in the euerlasting kingdome We haue exercisd our curiosity in obseruing that Adam â— the eldest of the eldest world died in his climactericall yere Sem the eldest son of the next world in his AbrahaÌ„ the father of the faithfull in his the blessed Virgin Mary the garden where the root of faith grew in hers But they whose Climacteriques wee obserue imployd their obseruation vpon their critical dayes the working of thy promise of a Messias vpoÌ„ them And shall we O my God make lesse vse of those dayes who haue more of theÌ„ Weâ— who haue not only the day of the Prophets the first dayes but the last daies in which thou hast spoken vnto vs by thy Son We are the children of the day for thou hast shind in as ful a Noone vpon vs as vpon the ThessaloniaÌ„s They who were of the night a Night which they had superinduc'd vpon theÌ„selues the Pharises pretended That if they had bin in their Fathers daies those indicatory and iudicatory those Criticall dayes they would not haue been partakers of the bloud of the Prophets And shal we who are in the day these Daies not of the Prophets but of the Son stone those Prophets againe and crucifie that Son againe for all those euident Indications and critical Iudicatures which are afforded vs Those opposd aduersaries of thy Son the pharises with the HerodiaÌ„s watch'd a Critical day Then wheÌ„ the State was incensd against him they came to tempt him in the daÌ„gerous question of Tribute They left him that day was the Critical day to the Saduces The same day saies thy Spirit in thy word the Saduces came to him to question him about the Resurrection and them hee silenc'd They left him this was the Criticall day for the Scribe expert in the Law who thoght himselfe learneder then the Herodian the Pharise or Saduce and he teÌ„pted him about the great CommaÌ„dement himâ— Christ left without power of replying When all was done that they weÌ„t about to begin their circle of vexation and tentation again Christ sileÌ„ces them so that as they had taken their Criticall dayes to come in That and in that day so Christ imposes a Criticall day vpon them From that day forth saies thy Spirit no man durst aske him any more questions This O my God my most blessed God is a fearefull Crisis a fearefull Indication when we will study and seeke and finde what dayes are fittest to forsake thee in To say Now Religion is in a Neutralitie in the world and this is my day the day of libertie Now I may make new friends by changing my old religioÌ„ and this is my day the day of aduancement But O my God with thy seruaÌ„t Iacobs holy boldnes who though thou lamedst him would not let thee goe till thou hadst giuen him a blessing Though thou haue laid me vpon my hearse yet thou shalt not depart from mee from this bed till thou haue giuen me a Crisis a Iudgment vpon my selfe this day Since a day is as a thousand yeres with thee Let O Lord a day be as a weeke to me and in this one let me coÌ„sider seuen daies seuen critical daies and iudge my selfe that I be not iudged by thee First this is the day of thy visitatioÌ„ thy comming to me and would I looke to be welcome to thee and not entertaine thee â—n thy comming to me We measure not the visitations of great persons by their apparel by their equipage by the solemnity of their coÌ„ming but by their very coÌ„ming and therefore howsoeuer thou come it is a Crisis to me that thou wouldest not loose me who seekst me by any means This leads me from my first day thy visitation by sicknes to a secoÌ„d to thâ— light and testimony of my Conscience There I haue an euening a morning a sad guiltinesse in my soule but yet a cheerfull rising of thy Son toâ— Thy Euenings and Mornings made dayes in the Creation and there is no mention of Nights My sadnesses for sins are euenings but they determin not in night but deliuer me ouer to the day the day of a Conscience deiected but then rectified accused but then â—cquitted by thee by him who speaks thy word who is thy word thy Son From this day the Crisis and examinatioÌ„ of my CoÌ„science breaks out my third day my day of preparing fitting my selfe for a more especial receiuing of thy Sonne in his institutioÌ„ of the Sacrament In which day though thâ—re be many dark passages slippry steps to them who wil entangle and endanger themselues in vnnecessary disputations yet there are light houres inough for any man â—o goe his whole iourney intended by thee to know that that Bread and Wine is not more really assimilated to my body to my blood then the Body and blood of thy Sonne is communicated to me in that action and participation of that bread and that wine And hauing O my God walkd with thee these three dayes The day of thy visitation the day of my Conscience The day of preparing for this seale of Reconciliation I am the lesse afraid of the clouds or storms of my fourth day the day of my dissolution traÌ„smigratioÌ„ froÌ„ hence Nothing deserues the name of happines that makes the remeÌ„braÌ„ce of death bitter And O death 〈◊〉 bitter is the remeÌ„brance of thee to a man that liues at rest in his possessions the Man that hath Nothing to vexe him yea vnto him that is able to receiue meat Therefore hast thou O my God made this sicknes in which I am not able to receiue meate my fasting day my Eue to this great festiual my dissolution And this day of death shall deliuer me ouer to my fift day the day of my Resurrection for how long a day soeuer thou make that day in the graue yet there is no day between that and the Resurrection Then wee shall all bee inuested reapparelled in our owne bodies but they who haue made iust vse of their former dayes be super-inuested with glorie wheras the others condemned to their olde clothes their sinfull bodies shall haue Nothing added but immortalitie to torment And this day of awaking me and reinuesting my Soule in my body and my body in the body of Christ shall present mee Bodie and Soule to my sixt day The day of Iudgement which is truely and most literally the Critical the Decretory day both because all Iudgement shall bee manifested to me then and I shall assist in iudging the world thenâ— and because then that Iudgement shall declare to me and possesse mee of my
Seuenth day my Euerlasting Saboth in thy rest thâ— glory thy ioy thy sight thy sâ—lfe and where I shall liue as long without reckning any more Dayes after as thy Sonne and thy Holy Spirit liued with thee before you three made any Dayes in the Creation 14. PRAYER O Eternall and most gracious God who though thou didst permit darknesse to be before light in the Creation yet in the making of light didst so multiplie that light as that it enlightned not the day only but the night too though thou haue suffered some dimnesse some clouds of sadnesse disconsolatenesse to shed themselues vpon my soule I humbly blesse and thankfully glorifie thy holy name that thou hast afforded mee the light of thy spirit against which the prince of darkenesse cannot preuaile nor hinder his illumination of our darkest nights of our saddest thoughts Euen the visitation of thy most blessed Spirit vpon the blessed Virgin is called an ouershadowing There waâ— the presence of the Holy Ghost the fountaine of all light and yet an ouershadowing Nay except there were some light there could bee no shadow Let thy mercifull prouidence so gouerne all in this sicknesse that I neuer fall into vtter darknesse ignorance of thee or inconsideration of my selfe and let those shadowes which doe fall vpon mee faintnesses of Spirit and condemnations of my selfe bee ouercome by the power of thine irresistible light the God of consolation that when those shadowes haue done their office vpon mee to let me see that of my selfe I should fall into irrecouerable darknesse thy spirit may doe his office vpon those shadowes and disperse them and establish mee in so bright a day here as may bee a Criticall day to me a day wherein and whereby I may giue thy Iudgement vpon my selfe and that the words of thy sonne spoken to his Apostles may reflect vpon me Bâ—hold I am with you alwaies euen to the end of the world Intereà insomnes noctes Ego duco Diesque I sleepe not day nor night 15. MEDITATION NAturall Men haue coÌ„ceiued a two fold vse of sleepe That it is a refreshing of the body in this life That it is a preparing of the soule for the next That it is a feast and it is the Grace at that feast That it is our recreation and cheeres vs and it is our Catechisme and instructs vs wee lie downe in a hope that wee shall rise the stronger and we lie downe in a knowledge that wee may rise no more Sleepe is an Opiate which giues vs rest but such an Opiate as perchance being vnder it we shall wake no more But though naturall men who haue induced secondary and figuratiue considerations haue found out this second this emblematicall vse of sleepe that it should be a representation of death God who wrought and perfected his worke before Nature began for Nature was but his apprentice to learne in the first seuen daies and now is his foreman and works next vnder him God I say intended sleepe onely for the refreshing of man by bodily rest and not for a figure of death for he intended not death it selfe then But Man hauing induced death vpon himselfe God hath taken Mans Creature death into his hand and mended it and whereas it hath in it selfe a fearefull forme and aspect so that Man is afraid of his own Creature God presents it to him in a familiar in an assiduous in an agreeable and acceptable forme in sleepe that so when hee awakes from sleepe and saies to himselfe shall I bee no otherwise when I am dead than I was euen now when I was asleep hee may bee ashamed of his waking dreames and of his Melancholique fancying out a horâ—id and an affrightfull figure of that death which is so like sleepe As then wee need sleepe to liue out our threescore and ten yeeres so we need death to liue that life which we cannot out-liue And as death being our enemie God allowes vs to defend our selues against it for wee victuall ouâ— selues against death twice euery day as often as we eat so God hauing so sweetned death vnto vs as hee hath in sleepe wee put our selues into our Enemies hands once euery day so farre as sleepe is death and sleepe is as much death as meat is life This then is the misery of my sicknesse That death as it is produced from mee and is mine owne Creature is now before mine Eies but in that forme in which God hath mollified it to vs and made it acceptable in sleepe I cannot see it how many prisoners who haue euen hollowed themselues their graues vpon that Earth on which they haue lion long vnder heauie fetters yet at this houre are â—sleepe though they bee yet working vpon their owne graues by their owne waight hee that hath seene his friend die to day or knowes hee shall see it to morrow yet will sinke into a sleepe betweene I cannot and oh if I be entring now into Eternitie where there shall bee no more distinction of houres why is it al my businesse now to tell Clocks why is none of the heauinesse of my heart dispensed into mine Eie-lids â—hat they might fall as my heart doth And why since I haue loâ—t my delight in all obiects cannot I discontinue tâ—e facultie of seeing them by closing mine Eiâ—s in sleepe But why rather being entring into that presence where I shall wake continually and neuer sleepe more doe I not interpret my continuall waking here to bee a pâ—rasceue and a preparation to that 15. EXPOSTVLATION MY God my God I know for thou hast said it That he that keepeth Israel shall neither slumber nor sleepe But shall not that Israel ouer whom thou watchest sleepe I know for thou hast said it that there are Men whose damnation sleepeth not but shall not they to whom thou art Saluation sleepe or wilt thou take from them that euidence and that testimony that they are thy Israel or thou their saluation Thou giuest thy beloued sleepe Shall I lacke that seale of thy loue You shall lie downe and none shall make you afraid shal I bee outlawd from that protection Ionas slept in one dangerous storme and thy blessed Sonne in another Shall I haue no vse no benefit no application of those great Examples Lord if hee sleepe he shall doe well say thy Sonnes Disciples to him of Lazarus And shall there bee no roome for that Argument in me or shall I bee open to the contrary If I sleepe not shall I not bee well in their sense Let me not O my God take this too precisely too literally There is that neither day nor night seeth sleepe with his eies saies thy wise seruant Solomon and whether hee speake that of worldly Men or of Men that seeke wisdome whether in iustification or condemnation of their watchfulnesse we can not tell wee can tâ—ll That there are men that cannot sleepe till they haue done mischiefe
waters must we looke to bee drowned are they bottomlesse are they boundles That 's not the dialect of thy langauge thou hast giuen a Remedy against the deepest water by water against the inundation of sinne by Baptisme and the first life that thou gauest to any Creatures was in waters therefore â—hou doâ—â—t not â—hrâ—â—ten vâ— wiâ—h an irremâ—diablenesse when our affliction is a Sea It is so if we consider our selues so thou callest Gennezareth which was but a lake and not salt a Sea so thou callest the Mediterranean Sea still the great Sea because the inhabitants saw no other Sea they that dwelt there thought a Lake a Sea and the others thought a little Sea the greatest and wee that know not the afflictions of others call our owne the heauiest But O my God that is truly great that ouerflowes the chanâ—ell that is really a great affliction which is aboue my strength but thou O God art my strength and then what can bee aboue it Mountaines shake with the swelling of thy Sea secular Mountaines men strong in power spirituall mountaines men strong in grace are shaked with afflictions but thou laiest vp thy sea in store-houses euen thy corrections are of thy treasure and thou wilt not waste thy corrections when they haue done their seruice to humble thy patient thou wilt call them in againe for thou giuest the Sea thy decree that the waters should not passe thy Commandement All our waters shal run into Iordan thy seruants passed Iordan dry foot they shall run into the red Sea the Sea of thy Sons bloud the red Sea that red Sea drownes none of thine But they that saile in the Sea tell of the danger thereof I that am yet in this affliction owe thee the glory of speaking of it But as the wise man bids me I say I may speak much and come short wherefore in summe thou art all Since thou art so O my God and affliction is a Sea too deepe for vs what is our refuge thine Arke thy ship In all other Seas in all other afflictions those meanes which thou hast ordained In this Sea in Sicknesse thy Ship is thy Physitian Thou hast made a way in the Sea and a safe path in the waters shewing that thou canst saue from all dangers yea though a man went to Sea without art yet where I finde all that I finde this added Neuerthelesse thou woulâ—est not that the worke of thy wisdome should be idle Thou canst saue without meanes but thou hast told no man that thou wilt Thou hast told euery man that thou wilt not When the Centurion beleeued the Master of the ship more than Saint Paul they were all opened to a great danger this was a preferring of thy meanes before thee the Author of the meanes but my God though thou beest euery where I haue no promise of appearing to me but in thy ship Thy blessed Sonne preached out of a Ship The meanes is preaching he did that and the Ship was a type of the Church hee did it thereâ— Thou gauest S. Paul the liues of all them that saild with him If they had not beene in the Ship with him the gift had not extended to them As soone as thy Son was come out of the ship immediatly there met him out of the tombes a man with an vncleane spirit and no man could hold him no not with chaines Thy Sonne needed no vse of meanes yet there wee apprehend the danger to vs if we leaue the ship the meanes in this case the Physitian But as they are Ships to vs in those Seas so is there a Ship to them too in which they are to stay Giue mee leaue O my God to assist my selfe with such a construction of these words of thy seruant Paul to the Centurion when the Mariners would haue left the Ship Except these abide in the Ship you cannot bee safe Except they who are our ships the Physitians abide in that which is theirs and our ship the truth and the sincere and religious worship of thee and thy Gospell we cannot promise our selues so good safety for though we haue our ship the Physitian he hath not his ship Religion And meanes are not meanes but in their concatenation as they depend and are chained together The ships are great saies thy Apostle but a helme turnes them the men are learned but their religion turnes their labours to good And therefore it was a heauy â—â—â—se when the third part oâ— the ships perished It is a heauy case where either all Religion or true Religion should forsake many of these ships whom thou hast sent to conuey vs ouer these Seas But O my God my God since I haue my ship and they theirs I haue them and they haue thee why are we yet no neerer land As soone as thy Sonnes Disciple had taken him into the ship immediatly the ship was at the land whither they went Why haue nor they and I this dispatch Euery thing is immediatly done which is done when thou wouldst haue it done Thy purpose terminates euery action and what was done before that is vndone yet Shall that slacken my hope Thy Prophet from thee hath forbid it It is good that a man should both hope and quietly wait for the saluation of the Lord. Thou puttest off many iudgements till the last day many passe this life without any and shall not I endure the putting off thy mercy for a day and yet O my God thou puttest me not to that for the assurance of future mercy â—s present mercy But what is my assurance now What is my seale It is but a cloud that which my Physitians call a cloud in that which giues them their Indication But a Cloud Thy great Seale to all the world the raine-bow that â—ecured the world for euer from drowning was but a reflexion vpon a cloud A cloud it selfe was a pillar which guided the church and the glory of God not only was but appeared in a cloud Let me returne O my God to the consideration of thy seruant Eliahs proceeding in a time of desperate drought he bids them look towards the Sea They looke and â—ee nothing He bids theÌ„ againe and againe seuen times and at the seuenth time they saw a little cloud rising out of the Sea and presently they had their desire of raine Seuen dayes O my God haue we looked for this cloud and now we haue it none of thy Indications are friuolous thou makest thy signes seales and thy Seales effects and thy effects consolation and restitution whersoeuer thou maiest receiue glory by that way 19. PRAYER O Eternall and most gracious God who though thou passedst ouer infinite millions of generations before thou camest to a Creation of this world yet when thou beganst didst neuer intermit that worke but continuedst day to day till thou hadst perfited all the worke and deposed
it in the hands and rest of a Sabbath though thou haue beene pleased to glorifie thy selfe in a long exercise of my patience with an expectation of thy declaration of thy selfe in this my sicknesse yet since thou hast now of thy goodnesse afforded that which affords vs some hope if that bee still the way of thy glory proceed in that way and perfit that worke and establish me in a Sabbath and rest in thee by this thy seale of bodily restitution Thy Priests came vp to thee by steps in the Temple Thy Angels came downe to Iaacob by steps vpon the ladder we finde no staire by which thou thy selfe camest to Adam in Paradise nor to Sodome in thine anger for thou and thou oâ—ely art able to doe all at once But O Lord I am not wearie of thy pace nor wearie of mine owne patience I prouoke â—heâ— not with a praier not with a wish not with a â—ope to more haste than consists with thy purpose nor looke that any other thing should haue entred into thy purpose but thy glory To heare thy â—steps comming towards mee is the same comfort as to see thy face present with mee whether thou doe the worke of a thousand yeere in a day or extend the worke of a day to a thousand yeere as long as thou workest it is light and comfort Heauen it selfe is but an extention of the same ioy and an extention of this mercie to proceed at thy leisure in the way of restitution is a manifestation of heauen to me here vpon earth From that people to whom thou appearedst in signes and in Types the Iewes thou art departed because they trusted in them but from thy Church to whom thou hast appeared in thy selfe in thy Sonne thou wilt neuer depart because we cannot trust too much in him Though thou haue afforded me these signes of restitution yet if I confide in them and beginne to say all was but a Naâ—urall accident and nature begins to discharge her selfe and shâ—e will perfit the whole worke my hope shall vanish because it is not in thee If thou shouldest take thy hand vtterly from me and haue nothing to doe with me Nature alone were able to destroy mee but if thou withdraw thy helping hand alas how friuolous are the helps of Nature how impotent the assistances of Art As therefore the morning dew is a pawne of the euening fatnesse so O Lord let this daies comfort be the earnest of to morrowes so fâ—rre as may conforme me entirely to thee to what end and by what way soâ—uer thy mercie haue appointed mee 20. Idâ—agunt Vpon these Indications of digested matter they proceed to purge 10. MEDITATION THougâ— counsel seeme rather to consist of spirituall parts than action yet action is the spirit and the soule of counsell Counsels are not alwaies determined in Resolutions wee cannot alwaies say this was concluded actions are alwaies determined in effects wee can say this was done Then haue Lawes their reuerence and their maiestie when wee see the Iudge vpon the Bench executing them Then haue counsels of warre their impressions and their operations when we see the seale of an Armie set to them It was an ancient way of celebrating the memorie of such as deserued well of the State to afford them that kinde of statuarie representation which was then called Hermes which was the head and shoulders of a man standing vpon a Cube but those shoulders without armes and hands All together it figured a constant supporter of the state by his counsell But in this Hierogliphique which they made without hands they passe their consideration no farther but that the Counsellor should bee without hands so farre as not to reach out his hand to forraigne tentations of bribes in matters of Counsell and that it was not necessary that the head should employ his owne hand that the same men should serue in the execution which assisted in the Counsell but that there should not belong hands to euery head action to euery counsell was neuer intended so much as in figure and representation For as matrimonie is scarce to bee called matrimonie where there is a resolution against the fruits of matrimonie against the hauing of Children so counsels are not counsels but illusions where there is from the beginning no purpose to execute â—he determinaâ—ions of â—hose counsels The arts and sciences are most properly referred to the head that is their proper Element and Spheare But yet the art of prouing Logique and the Art of perswading Rhetorique are deduced to the hand and that expressed by a hand contracted into a sist and this by a hand enlarged and expanded and euermore the power of man and the power of God himselfe is expressed soâ— All things are in hiâ— hand â— neither is God so often presented â—o vs by names that carry our consideratioÌ„ vpon counsell as vpon execution of counsell he is oftner called the Lord of Hosts â—han by all other names that may be referred to the other significationâ— Herebyâ— therefore wee take into our meditation the slipperie condition of man whose happinesse in any kinde the defect of any one thing conducing to that happinesse may ruine but iâ— must haue all the peeces to make it vp Without counsell I had not got thus farreâ— withouâ— action and practise I should goe no farther towards health But what is â—he present necâ—ssary action purging A withdrawing a violating of Nature a farther weakening O deare price O strange way of addition to doe it by substraction of restoring Nature to violate Nature of prouiding strength by increasing weaknesse Was I not sicke before And is it a question of comfort to be asked now Did your Physicke make you sicke Was that it that my Physicke promised to make me sicke This is another step vpon which we may stand and see farther into the miserie of man the time the season of his Miserie It must bee done now O ouer-â—â—nning ouer-watchfull ouer-diligent and ouer-sociable misery of man that seldome comes alone but then when it may accompanie other miseries and so put one another into the higher exaltation and better â—eart I am ground euen to an attenuation and must proceed to euacuation all waies to exinaniâ—ion and annihilation 20. EXPOSTVLATION MY God my God the God of Order but yet not of Ambition who assignest place to euery one but not contention for place when shall it be thy pleasure to put an end to all these quarrels for spirituall precedences when shall men leaue their vncharitable disputations which is to take place faith or repentance and which when we consider faith and works The head and the hand too are required to a perfit naturall man Counsell and action too to a perfit ciuill man saith and works too to him that is perfiâ—ly spirituall But because it is easily said I beleeue and because it doth not easily lie in proofe nor is easily demonstrable by any euidence taken from my heart for