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A81423 A dialogue between the French King, and the late King James at St. Germains en Laye: occasion'd by the signing of the peace. James II, King of England, 1633-1701, associated name.; Louis XIV, King of France, 1638-1715, associated name. 1697 (1697) Wing D1331A; ESTC R222259 5,314 26

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put a Trick upon me and was the occasion of my losing the Royal-Sun and put the Chevalier de Tourville in such a Disorder that I could never since get him to look the English Fleet in the Face though between you and I I never intended he should K. J. That was a Disappointment Sir But how was I served at Salisbury but I 'll say that for my self if my Nose had not bled I 'd have spoil'd the Dutch having Trade for ever but such things are ominous F. K. To none but Cowards Sir you might have kept your Kingdoms till now had you shuffled your Cards well but you Drove too fast to keep your self i' th Box. K. J. I did all for the best Sir out of a tender regard to Mother-Church It was upon that account Sir That I sent my Brother Charles to Heaven a little before his Time He was too sluggish to promote the Catholick Interest and therefore I sent him packing In requital for this and some other little Tricks I put upon my Subjects they sent me to take the Air at St. Germains but I 'll remember 'em if ever I make 'em another Visit F. K. None but a Madman would hope for such a thing However Sir I beseech you don 't rely upon me for any Assistance for to tell you the truth I have done the utmost that lay in my power I have Exhausted my Kingdom to that degree both of Men and Money that 't is e'en heart sick and I am afraid I shall hardly live to see it recover again I have flung away Million after Million to gain the Universal Monarchy but am farther from it now than ever Had it not been for some Trusty Correspondents in England who now and then presented me with a Brace or two of East-India Men or a Virginia Fleet I had been quite Unhing'd long ago K. J. I hope your Majesty forgets the Service my Privateers have done sometimes F. K. Now and then Sir they have brought me in a Collier or a Mackeril-Boat but that won't pay my Armies As for my Fleet I have made but little use of them since the Surfeit they got at La Hogue which made 'em keep a long Quarrantain at Thoulon to my Cost I 'm sure whilst the Confederates very bountifully flung their Fireworks into my Sea-port Towns for joy But if you had had no other Allowance than the Purchase of your Privateers you might have drank Small Beer and Beverage instead of Champain and Burgundy K. J. My Men are afraid the Prince of Orange will put 'em to the squeak if he gets 'em and they are naturally averse to the smell of English Hemp. But if I live to see England again I 'll make your Majesty amends F. K. Pray don't let the thoughts of a Kingdom disturb you I had great hopes once of being King of Great Britain my Self and that would have made me Amends sufficient But now neither you nor I are like to be the better for it K. J. Truly Sir to speak like a Philosopher Crowns are but Encumbrances yet it goes a little against the grain to see my Son-in-Law take up my Crown before I think fit to lay it down F. K. You know the English Proverb What can't be cur'd must be ●ndur'd I have told you more than once I have done to the utmost of my Ability and I had better make a Peace with Honour than be compell'd to it by Force Heaven runs counter to all my Designs and instead of giving Peace I shall in a little time be glad to beg it For Money I have none and Men grow scarce last Year I was in great hopes to have broke the League and then I 'de have pickt the Bones of the Confederates one after another but that fail'd This Year I made sure of the Spanish Flota that would have fill'd my Bags bravely but was fain to content my self with the Plunder of Carthagena and glad I got off so The English Fleet have made themselves amends by Sacking Petit Guaves and Snapping the Buccaniers So that when all these things are considered I shall hardly be Two-pence the better for the Expedition I thought Pointi's Cargo would have been Gold Dust and Diamonds but instead of that he has brought me home the Twelve Apostles and the Virgin Mary which for fear of displeasing the Clergy I dare not melt You can't be ignorant what Showers of Gold I rain'd in Poland to get the Crown for Conti but there the Rogues have shamm'd me and chose the Elector of Saxony My good Friends and Allies at the Port are put to the Rout by the Imperialists I wish I had Cheteau-Neuf in my Cabinet at Marli he 'll be torn a-pieces for telling such a pack of Lies I made 'em believe I was strong enough to raise Contributions as far as the Gates of Vienna but instead of that Monsieur Choiseul is fain to content himself with passing and repassing the Rhine and has the satisfaction of seeing Eberenbourg taken before his Face 'T is true I took Barcelona and Aeth but had it not been to gain the Grand Point I had rather have let it alone however it has saved the Hangman a labour and me the trouble of Disbanding a great many who for want of Employment have turned Free-booters And in Flanders do what I can your Son-in-Law is too cunning for me K. J. Then your Majesty is resolved to sign Peace F. K. It is already done Sir K. J. And has your Majesty acknowledged the Prince of Orange King of England whilst I live F. K. Upon the Word of a King I have K. J. I hope your Majesty has observed the Distinction between a King de Facto and de Jure F. K. Truly Sir it is too late now to mind Distinctions I have done it and can't undo it if I would I must be a Slave to my Word now and to confirm the Sincerity of my Intentions have given him his Principality of Orange into the Bargain K. J. Then I 'm undone indeed for I design'd to have begg'd that for my share and he should have been a Titular Prince as well as my self But what Provision for my Son the Prince of Wales F. K. None at all Sir if you are willing to take my Advice send him to his Mother if you know where to find her or if you had rather I 'll prefer him to be a Valet de Chambre to the Dutchess of Burgundy K. J. No Sir I 'll make him a Clergy-man he 's a forward Child But pray Sir what separate Article for the Relief of those faithful tho unfortunate Fools the afflicted and distressed Cavaliers in England I expect the first Fleet from thence will bring over some Thousands to implore your Majesty's Protection I have nothing left to Succour or Support them my self but I hope your most Christian Majesty won't forget their Service F. K. No Sir by no means I design to present them to the King of Morocco he 's a dull Fellow yet has done me some little Service against the Spaniards and I ought to make him amends but if he has no occasion for them they 'll serve to stock my Plantations they have been Sick of the Scurvy a long time course Fare and hard Labour will be good for the Health of their Bodies K. J. Now it comes into my head What does your Majesty think of a Descent upon Jerusalem and the Holy Land That would be a glorious Conquest F. K. Pray Sir trouble me no more with your Projects I 'll persuade the Old Gentleman to send you a Cardinal's Cap to strengthen your Whimsical Brain and for your Spouse when an Abbessship is vacant I won't forget her And so Sir adieu K. J. I 'll bear my Cross with Patience if I can Ah! Coleman Coleman there 's no Faith in Man FINIS
A DIALOGUE Between the French King And the LATE King JAMES A DIALOGUE Between the French King And the LATE King JAMES At St. Germains en Laye Occasion'd by the Signing of the PEACE LONDON Printed for Richard Baldwin near the Oxford-Arms in Warwick-Lane 1697. A DIALOGUE Between the French King And the Late King JAMES F. K. BON jour Mon Cousin K. J. I hope your Majesty will excuse my want of Breeding To tell you the Truth Sir I am quite out of love with any thing of French F. K. Why so out of humour Sir K. J. Not without Cause Sir if I may be a Judge in my own Case I presume your Majesty cannot but know the Occasion F. K. Upon my Honour not I Madam de Maintenon and I have been Solacing our selves congratulating each other upon the good News of a Peace K. J. And I upon the same Account have been Cursing my Cruel Fate and False Friends F. K. Sir I hope you are not come to affront me But that I am in an extream good Humour I might have resented such an Expression K. J. Your Majesty may do with me as you please I have lost Three Kingdoms already and I have nothing left now worth losing F. K. Come Sir let me desire you to curb your Passion and guide your self by Reason K. J. Is this a time to talk of Reason when Experience tells me I am in a fair way to beg my Bread F. K. What would you have me do K. J. As you promised me Sir and as I promised my dear Friends soon after I came here That you would not put up your Sword till you had revenged my Quarrel and replaced me on the Throne from whence the Heretical Crew expelled me F. K. 'T is true Sir I drew my Sword and will not put it up my self yet upon a second Consideration the Dauphin shall and really it is not just he should inherit a wasted Kingdom nor that I should entail upon him a perpetual War with his Neighbours therefore I have advised him to take your Grandfather's Motto Beati Pacifici knowing by my own Experience the fatal Mischiefs of War K. J. Truly Sir I think you cannot in Honour make a Peace with the Prince of Orange so long as he keeps me out of my Throne F. K. Put Interest in one Scale and Honour in the other you 'll find it a meer Trifle Necessity has no Law You have been my Pensioner these Nine Years and not only your self and Bedfellow but the little Prince as you call him and a Gallimaufrey of Highlanders Rapparees and Renegado's have been fed and cloathed at my Charge Is all this nothing K. J. Worse than nothing Sir except you had compleated that meritorious Work of Re-enthroning me But if I had had the least thoughts how I should have been served I would long ere now have come to Composition with my Subjects The English are naturally Honest and Good natur'd and I am perswaded would have allowed me the Interest though not the Principal But now Sir I have no hopes F. K. Recollect your Memory and you may remember that I lent you an Army in Ireland which with your own Courage and the Assistance of some able Friends in England and Scotland might have enabled you to regain your Post but no sooner did the King of England offer you Battle but away you run and left my Men to be knockt o' th' Head at the Boyne K. J. Natural Infirmities Sir you know are unavoidable 'T was nothing but what I deriv'd from my peaceable Grandfather my Brother Charles had a little of his Hypocrisy and I too much of his Courage yet Sir I can remember how I swing'd the Dutch bravely when I peept out of my Fortification of Cable-Ropes and cried Halloo Boys halloo Oh! how I made the Rogues scamper but now I grow old and unfit for Martial Exercise F. K. Luis d'ores you have squandred away without number under pretence of Secret Service for supplying the Necessities of the Loyal Clergy for Correspondence with Great Men at Court providing Arms and Ammunition to beat up the Prince of Orange's Quarters and a round Sum for Pamphleteers New-writers Ballad-makers Private Presses and Wagerers But where 's the Fruit of all this K. J. Sir you are too hasty I had as fine a Plot on the Stocks as any Jesuit in Europe could invent and would have Launcht it in two or three Months if this damn'd Peace had not prevented it F. K. Well remembred This brings to mind your fertile Inventions and Abortive Executions I suppose you have not forgot the Chevalier Granvil's good Success That was a rare Contrivance of yours o' my word had it been well effected K. J. Success is not in the Hands of Man Sir if it were I had had as good Success with the Prince of Orange as you had with the Duke of Loraine F. K. Your Son Berwick offered to bring the Prince of Orange Dead or Alive upon Condition that I would give him a Marshals Staff but that Project fail'd K. J. 'T is true Sir the Duke took the Sacrament on 't but forgot Ned Petres Benediction I 'm sure I did my endeavour on my bare Knees and if Ave-Mary's and Pater-Noster's would have effected it I had carried the Day For my part I believe the Virgin was asleep and St. Loyala thick of hearing else why should I be thus disappointed F. K. I 'll tell you why Sir your Faith has not been well-grounded you have expected Mountains and are fain to content your self with Mole-hills Could you ever think to reassume your Abdicated Throne by the help of a pack of desperate forlorn Fellows who have liv'd upon the Odd Pence you could spare out of my Allowance And whilst they pretended a Tenderness of Conscience would have cut your own Throat with as little Remorse as Rookwood or Cranbourn would have Assassinated your Son-in-Law K. J. I am persuaded Sir That Glorious Work had been done by my Faithful Servants and Martyrs had not those Two Traitors De La Rue and Pendergrass told Tales I say Sir A man can do no more than he can do and if such Enterprizes fail we are the less beholden to Heaven F. K. I am sorry Sir you are Born under so Malevolent a Planet If my Stars had been so unkind to me I should scarce have been Louis Le Grand now and weathered the Point through so many Campaigns as I have done But now I grow in years it is high time to be quiet for I 'd fain go to Heaven in Peace K. J. 'T is True you have had better success than I Sir but you may thank your Ammunition Sir 't is that has done you many a good piece of Service You Charg'd your Cannon with Luid'ores and fill'd your Bombs with Pistoles which upon the first Discharge made the Gates fly open and the Governors your Humble Servants F. K. Not always neither you may remember how Ashby