so generally neglected by the peo-ple of God Ans It hath been practised by the people of God both in Scripture as is proved and it is evident that the Psalmes of David are frequently nothing but Meditations though not in this method and by many in our daies 2. It being a private Closet-duty the omission nor performance of it could be taken notice of and so the omission of it could not be reproved nor performance observed 3. The Directions and Instructions for Meditation have been generally very abstruse and intricate CHAP. III. Preparatory Directions concerning some Circumstances belonging to Meditation 1. FOR the place that must be private remote from company and noise Isaac went into the fields our Saviour into a garden and David wisheth us to enter into our Chamber and be still Psa 4.4 and our Saviour bids us enter into our Closet and shut the door the place must be such as must be remote from noise and company or any thing which might distract us in the duty and such a place that we may not be interrupted or forced to break off before the duty be ended it must be also private and remote from the observation of others so that we may neither be heard nor seen because there are divers gestures and expressions which are not convenient for any one but God and ones own soul to be privy to Which of those places you finde to be most advantagious to you in the matters of Meditation you may choose 2. For the Time when The best is in the morning 1. Because it is the first-fruits of the day and the first-fruits being holy all the rest are sanctified 2. Because our thoughts being then not soyled with worldly businesse will not be so subject to be distracted 3. Because the body it self is more serene then after meals and this duty needs an empty stomack not only because the head will be more clear and fit for Meditation but also because many passages of Meditation require so much intention of the minde and servency of affection that they do hinder digestion 4. Because that it being in the morning will have an influence upon the whole day but this is not an universall rule for we reade that Isaac went forth in the evening to meditate Gen. 24.63 and in case the subject of your Meditation be a Sermon then if it may be the best time is immediatly after the hearing of it before your affections cool or your memory fail you 2. For the how long considering the parts of Meditation are so many viz. preparation considerations affections resolutions c. and none of them are to be past slightly over for affections are not quickly raised nor are we to cease blowing the fire as soon as ever it begin to flame until it be well kindled half an hour may be thought to be the least for beginners and an hour for those that are versed in this duty But there are two rules in this particular especially to be observed 1. That as we ought not to leave off our praiers before that temper and frame of heart is wrought which is sutable to the matter of our prayers viz. we should not leave off the confession of sinne till our hearts are made sensible of and humble for our sinnes nor should we leave off our praises until our hearts are filled with holy admirings and adorings of God and inflamed with his love So the end of Meditation being affections and resolutions we should not leave off until those are wrought 2. As in private prayer so long as we finde our hearts enlarged by the pourings of the Spirit of Supplication upon us we are not to leave off unlesse by our continuance in that duty we must omit another duty to which we were more particularly obliged at that time So in Meditation as long as we finde the heart affected we are to continue it But this Caution must be given that in such enlargements we must not continue them longer generally then while they come freely and without much straining and compulsion for that honey that comes freely of it self from the comb is pure but that which is forced by heat and pressure is not so well rellished but this Caution is for extraordinary enlargements for if the heart be dead we must use all means to awaken it But as fire must be blown till it be well kindled but afterwards blowing hinders the boyling of any thing that is set over it So when once our hearts are inflamed and enlarged with holy affections in an extraordinary manner 't is but a hinderance to our affections to return to the Meditation of those Points that raised them CHAP. IV. Rules for the Subject The Division of and Reasons for this Method of Meditation 1. BY no means let it be Controversie for that will turn Meditation into Study 2. Nor nice speculations for they be saplesse without nourishment besides being so light they float in the brain having no weight to sink them down into the heart and indeed were they there they have nothing in them to affect the heart withall 3. Let the Subject of Meditation be the plainest powerfullest and usefullest Truths of God as death hell heaven judgement mercies of God our own sinnes the Love and Sufferings of Christ c. 4. Let the Subject of your Meditation be that that is most sutable to your spirituall wants as in the time of desertion meditate most of the love and mercies of God c. Rules for Meditation it self they are of three sorts 1. Preparatory 2. For the body of the duty 3. For the Conclusion Two things by way of preparation besides the choice of the Subject the first is to be convinced of and to be affected with the presence of God The second is praier for assistance from God 2. For the body of Meditation it self it consists of three parts The first I call Consideration which is nothing but the convincing our hearts of severall Truths that belong to that Subject whereof we meditate As as if the subject of our Meditation be death the considerations may go thus alas O my Soul how and when and where we shall die we know not generally men die sooner then they expect and certain it is whensoever that hour comes we must bid adieu to honours pleasures riches friends and at last our own bodies c. The second part is affections whether it be love of God or Christ or spirituall things despising of the world admiring of God or any other spiritual affection The third part are Resolutions to doe this or that or leave this or that Now that this is the most proper and genuine way of Meditation appears by this 1. Because it is not artificiall and such as requires Learning as those Directions are which wish us to consider the efficient finall formall materiall cause of death the adjuncts concomitants c. which though they may somewhat help the learned yet such hard words and artificial
forgets so that if one might gain a world when the heart is overwhelmed with grief or inflamed with love or ravished with joy one could not remember the powrings out of the soul In such cases one may say of such Meditations as St Paul speaks of those glorious things which he saw when he was wrapt into the third Heavens they are neither lawful nor possible to be uttered many times the secrets in our communion with God are of that nature that it is not lawful by reason of that scardal nor possible to utter because the affections being so intensly employ'd invention memory and intellectual actings of the Soul during that time do almost quite cease and indeed whosoever goes about to invent instances of Meditation if it be only a learned man and not holy his studies may exceed his actings that way but if it be an holy experienced Christian as his inward thoughts of love joy grief and admirings of God are above all that his tongue doth or can utter so those secret expressions which he useth between God and his own soul when his thoughts are full of heaven and of God are much beyond what he can invent or by stndy expresseth Therefore since those Meditations that are fullest of devotion cannot be remembred to set down Instances of Meditations except one should take them from some Saint as he was powring out his soul before God in secret one can never set them fully down in secret I say For the soul is never so free nor may be before others as with God alone and the truth is if I had not had these Instances of Solemn Meditation by me I think I should hardly have set down any of that kinde I should only have referr'd him to the Psalms It was so that I wrote these from the mouth of one to whom though unseen I was oft times so near that I could hear his secretest devotions if uttered though but with an ordinary voice I am very confident for his part he thought that none but God and his own Soul were privy to his Praiers I have sometimes considered it as a case of Conscience whether it was lawfull by stealth to hear and afterwards to publish the private Meditations of others but considering how much advantage it may bring to others and how the party himself can suffer nothing in it his Name being concealed by me I resolve to publish them besides I very well know as I said before that the spiritual expressions between God and ones own soul in secret are forgotten almost as soon as ended It is very unlikely that any should remember them ten years after as the most of these are I thought good to give an account of this matter lest I should be thought to have that holy frame of heart which many of the expressions in these Meditations argues that he had that used them and arrogate to my self that which is farre from me If any shall be offended at the brevity and shortnesse of my Directions for this great and weighty businesse of Meditation I shall only say thus much as to that 1. That I am not willing to overcharge or affright new beginners for for such I do very much intend this Treatise with too great a number of particulars 2. I would not have this swell above the bignesse of a Manuall for I have often observed that when one hath perswaded some to buy some Book and told them it hath been but a small price it hath been almost as strong a motive the smalnesse of the price as the goodnesse of the Book and I would not be willing that both these Motives should be wanting to the Buying of this Book As for the plainnesse of the Stile or matter I shall thus excuse it if it oughto be excused I wrote this for the meanest and ignorantest sort of Christians that they might buy and understand it that they might buy it I have made it a Manuall that they might understand it I have made it plain and spoke to them in their own language and to the Learned I say if any such shall reade this Treatise Indocti repiunt coelum and though I highly prize Learning yet I know that as to praier and meditation and all other acts of devotion wherein we keep a strict Communion with God and watch over our own souls an experimental knowledge and acquaintance with and inflam'd affections towards God will more avail us then all the Learning in the world and doubtless it is not generally ignorance in those that live under Ordinances but the non-improvement of the Truths we know that will undoe us if we did but improve these plain truths viz. that God is that there will be a Day of Judgement that we must die that we ought to love God with all our heart with all our soul with all our minde with all our strength that we should do as we would be done to I say if we did but improve these into practice we should attain to more holinesse then if we knew a thousand times more and left those truths as generally men do by them as things forgotten I doe very much think that the truths of Religion have been spun into too fine a thred of late daies and some have observed that fewer have been converted of late years then formerly when fundamentals have been plainly powerfully and practically prest upon the conscience it is an errour to think that notions so they be spirituall cannot be too acute or speculative I have one thing to entreat of the Christian Reader and it was one end of publishing this Treatise that I might with it publish these my desires the thing that I am to request of you will neither be charge nor trouble It is your frequent serious fervent praiers that I desire of you I know it is us'd too much as a complement among Christians to desire prayers of their Christian friends and they are too often superficially promis'd and too seldom conscienciously perform'd nor would I have thee whosoever thou art that fearest God account this my Request as a thing of course and that it is at thy liberty to grant it or no for suppose a poor distressed man overwhelm'd and almost swallowed up with the sense of his miseries and wants should with tears and strong importunities begge relief of thee Dost thou think it were an arbitrary thing when it was in thy power to relieve him or not Mightst thou not justly expect that the the next time thou wentst to pour out thy soul before God that he should keep by him the denial that thou gavest that poor man and give it thee when thou in the distressed thoughts of thy heart madst thy praier to him and dost thou think that the Lord will hold thee guiltlesse when one whose afflictions are many corruptions strong temptations to _____ shall in the anguish and bitternesse of his spirit desire thy praiers and thou refuse or neglect Consider whether at the day of judgement thou wilt have any sufficient excuse to pleade I have sometimes thought that the Bils that have publikely been put up for the praiers of the Congregation have been too little regarded it may be they have been too customarily and formally put up it may be so but it is not good for us to be Judges of evil thoughts little do we know what terrouts and fears and anguishes of spirit overwhelm them while they are so little regarded by us O that we were sensible of others afflictions and sorrows whether spiritual or temporal as they themselves are and as we would have them to be of ours were our souls in their souls stead and if the Lord should so by his providence order it as to bring us into those straits which we saw our Brother in and would not afford him so much as our prayers may we not justly expect that the next time that we our selves are in streights our consciences should take up a Parable and taunting Proverb against us and say as Josephs Brethren did we are verily guilty concerning our Brother in that we saw the anguish of his soul when he besought us and we would not hear therefore is all this distresse come upon us And that which I would desire thee to begge of God for me is That he would give me sincerely to aim at his glory in all my actions but especially those that belong to my Ministry that I might not be as a broken vessell and that he would give me greater discoveries of and love to himself and the Lord Jesus Christ and that he would give me gifts and strength and wisedom opportunity and a heart to serve him and mercies suitable to my wants that mine afflictions may be sanctified my temptations conquered and my corruptions mortified One thing more I am to request of thee that is to do what I know too much neglected by my self and I fear by others Thou art to pray for a blessing upon thy self when thou readest this Treatise and that God would make it a blessing unto others also into whose hands it shall come I desite you that you would help me with your praiers in this particular When we do but take our ordinary daily bread we crave a blessing how much more when we do things that concern our eternall good When we take a Book to that end spiritually to benefit by it do we think that it is in our own power or in the power of any Treatise that we reade without Gods assistance to do us good Nay the Word of God it self is but a dead Letter if the holy Spirit be absent when we hear or reade it But that thou shouldest desire a Blessing upon thy self in reading of this Book is not all I request of thee but that thou wouldest also extend thy prayers further even for others that it may be also for their edification whosoever shall reade it For as we are to pray that every Sermon we hear may be for the spirituall advantage of others as well as of our selves It holds also in reading of Treatises of Devotion FINIS
for one that is very poor to give The next Rule is Let this penalty be alwaies of something that is materially good as giving to the poor spending some time in reading of Scripture for as for Popish penances as whipping Pilgrimages and such like they are unprofitable and ridiculous The next Rule is Let this penalty be alwaies some holy duty that is most contrary to thy Master sin as if thy Master sin be Covetousnesse let it be almes if it be voluptuousnesse let it be fasting with praier or abstaining wholly for a time from that wherein thou most delightest c. The next Rule is Let your Vows be rather against the outward then the inward acts of sin rather against speaking angrily then being angry for though inward acts of sinne are worse yet they are not so much in our power The next Rule is If your Vows are concerning doing holy duties it is better to vow to spend so much time in reading holy Scripture or such like then to vow to reade so many Chapters for thou wilt be tempted to reade them over too fast that thou maist have ended whereas if it be so much time that thou hast resolved to spend thou wilt not be so subject to this temptation CHAP. XI Rules for the concluding of Meditation 1. THou art earnestly to beg of God strength to perform whatever thou hast resolved to do in his service This must be done fervently though briefly and humbly proceeding from an earnest desire to do what thou hast promised and resolved and also from an humble sense of thine inability to perform it 2. The second duty is thanksgiving if thou shalt perceive any heavenly warmth of love or spiritual hatred of sin or any other spiritual effect wrought in thy heart thou art to give God the glory and not to rejoyce in thy self but in the Lord but thou art to rejoyce with trembling knowing that if thou art puft up though thou hast the will to do good wrought in thee yet if thou provokest him he can stop it that thou shalt never be able to do what thou resolvest to do The first is an humble acknowledgement of our failings in the performing of this duty For if we were not geeen wood that love which is now but a spark would have been a flame God is not wanting unto us but we are wanting to our selves and him After these are performed there remaineth three duties more 1. We are to remember what Vows and promises we have made and it is very useful to write down all thy Vows as thou makest them in a Book because that we shall else be subject to forget the Vow or the time or conditions upon which we made it And it is good to have a Book to keep a Register of things in it besides a Diary which I have spoken of and given Rules for in a Manuall entituled A Directory to Christian Perfection 1. Let one head be for which you are to leave some leaves for Vows under which you must write all your Vows or Resolutions as you make them or spiritual promises for Christians and such like The second must be for the mercies of God eminent deliverances and also answers of Praiers These are to be set down with all pertinent circumstances that may any way encrease the mercy The third head should be for grosser failings which were good to be writ down not in letters at length that every one may reade them but in characters known only to our selves There are other things which because I do not now speak purposely of that businesse I omit The second thing after Meditation is ended is to remember what passages in our Meditation did most affect us and as it were to lay them up in our thoughts that frequently we may in the rest of the day think of them As when we walk in a garden we content not our selves with enjoying the fragrancy of the flowers while we are there but if we may have leave we often gather a Nosegay to smell of the rest of the day In this businesse of Meditation do thou likewise The third duty after Meditation is by degrees warily and unwillingly to go out of the presence of God to worldly emploiments Do not go from the presence of God as a bird out of the snare with joy and with speed And thou must go also watchfully and warily from such emploiments as one that carries some precious liquor in a shallow broad brittle dish he looks to his way to the dish and liquor that is in it lest by holding of it awry by fals or stumblings he should spill the one or break the other So must thou be watchfull over thy waies else the grace that God hath powred into thy heart in this duty will be spilt To rush into holy duties or out of them argues too great undervaluing of the things of God Instances OF Solemn Occasionall MEDITATION Meditation 1 ALas my God I am in a sad condition mine afflictions grow daily upon me and that which is mine unsupportable misery my corruptions grow faster upon me then my affliction What before made me weep will not now make me sigh The heavy burthen of a great abomination doth not lie upon me so much as before I was oppressed with a vain thought in my praiers Alas Lord alas I am undone alas my corruptions have almost made me love them and make me weary of duties and carelesse of graces My joys are gone and my sorrows are gone that were sutable to thy Word and now my joys are but the laughter of fools and my sorrows are carnall sensuall and more of hell in them then of heaven and as now I can scarce tell my sorrows so have I scarce any sorrow to tell I have sate down and wept to consider the great decays of holinesse in me but now I can see my God going from me and whenas now he is even out of sight mine eyes are as dry as my heart is hard Alas Lord if thou wilt not return thou wilt lose a poor soul that hath loved thee and is somewhat troubled Now poor sad soul that it is so wicked as it is Meditat. II. Lord thou seest the strange distempered temper of mine heart and spirit ah blessed God I should take more comfort if I should see my heart-bloud running forth before mine eye then to see mine eyes so dry and my heart so hard I have worn out almost all motives to holinesse they now take no impression in me which before were too strong for me to bear they ravisht me which now do not move me I scarce ever go to prayer but I have enough and too many spirituall complaints to employ it to express If every day I had not just cause to bewail a continued decay of grace I might have some respit of my griefs But what shall I now do When every day shall bear witnesse against me and every night my sin shall go to bed with
me and lie in my bosome and rise in the morning more strong then at night Ah when my former holy life shall be more terrible then others wicked lives When my former prayers shall be like the gall of Aspes unto me when those duties which should be my comfort are my terrour Alas what can my poor soul do when my present sins and my past duties which of them are the heaviest burthen unto me I do not know what shall I do When I consider these things then the thoughts of the affliction that lies upon me makes me weep a tear or two and my vain heart my deceitfull heart would perswade me that I weep for my sins Those in desertion are in a blessed condition to me they are sad and I am miserable I am guilty of that which their consciences do but accuse them of Alas have I lost my communion with God my sweet communion and the power I had to prevail with him for any mercy almost that I praied for now I can pray and pray and pray and go away without a blessing I can almost be content to be wicked Thou knowest mine heart or else my tears would deceive thee as well as me If they are worldly thoughts that have estranged me from thee thou knowest how to cure me If mine utter impoverishings will cure me let me be as poor as Job If thou wast not such a Physician as thou art I was past thy cure Meditat. III. Lord I am come now to pour out my soul before thee and my tears into thy bosome to tell thee the sad thoughts and sorrows of my heart Ah my God In this bitternesse of my soul and with tears in mine eyes and pride in my heart and sencelesnesse upon my spirit I speak these things Ah Lord thou hast scourged me with scorpions for my sins do encrease as well as my afflictions these afflictions to me are scorpions to me they have poison in them and at once I am scourged and stung with them a sad ease it is when my punishment is heavier then I can bear and yet notwithstanding I go from the presence of God too and that more and more My tears dry up in mine eyes and my love goes out of my heart as soon as kindled When the Candle of the Lord shined upon my Tabernacle in my first conversion when the fire of thy love was kindled in my heart I have had some discourses of devotion that I was not able to bear the ravishment that the remembrance and meditation of them brought to my soul now almost as full of sadnesse as then of joy after those times as those after the Floud My joys and the acts and workings of my grace grew very short-lived in comparison of what they were before Then they were Methusalems for age and Sampsons for strength to what they are now Before though I fell spiritually sick and my strength and comfort was gone yet I was sensible of my weaknesse it was a pain and a grief unto me that I could not walk into the delightful garden of the Spouse and to the sweet bed of his Spices I could weep for want of tears if not I could mourn for want of sorrow but now like a man that hath groaned and strugled so long that he can struggle no longer but grown sencelesse can hardly be perceived to breathe or live If the sweetest musick should be plaid by him or the dearest friend in the world should come and ask him with tears in his eyes Dear Husband or Dear Wife how do you the poor sick one doth not so much as open the eye to see who it is that speaks or if open them they being presently heavy with death fall down again and he dies So is it with my poor soul sometimes I can hear my Saviour as it were saying unto me for sometimes methinks I see him about my sick soul Ah poor Soul how dost thou do Is my Joseph yet living But alas Lord thou knowest I have scarce strength or life to lift up mine eye to thee Lord Can these bones live Can these dry eyes weep Can this frozen heart be enflamed Meditat. IV. Lord I am ashamed to consider what I know of thee when I think what I do for thee Ah my God the cares of the world lie heavy upon me Resolutions though never so strong are too weak to overcome my corruptions Alas I can scarce say any more then I have said in the confessing and bewailing my sad spirituall condition though I have said nothing to what I should say Have I not told thee Lord with tears in mine eyes and with a sad heart that I found my corruptions get ground of me my prayers my tears my resolutions and some endeavours do resist but cannot overcome them these keep them from prevailing so soon but not from prevailing I humbly confesse or desire so to do that I may complain to thee but I should adde to mine abominations exceedingly if I should complain of thee Mine heart doth almost tempt me to it when I consider what I was and what I am It is as a Talent of Lead upon my Soul yet since by my preaching thou art glorified and thy people edified more then if I should spend all my time in private Meditation I am willing to submit only I do humbly beseech thee with tears in mine eyes that though I have lesse time to spend in such private duties yet that my poor soul may not lose her love to them and though I perform fewer duties I may not perform them worse then I did when I performed more Meditat. V. I do much wonder at my self and at many nay somewhat at all Christians upon daies of humiliation but most at my self to hear the tongue of a poor Christian confessing and his eyes weeping for his sins and speaking of them with such expressions and such sighs that one would think Surely this Christian keeps a strict Communion with God surely he would not sin for a world surely God is in all this mans thoughts and yet stay but whilest he hath done his praier and you finde in him such strong thoughts words and actions that are almost incredible loose and idle words and vain thoughts I but too often experience makes it even past hope it should be otherwise with me If any Town that was straitly besieged with cruel enemies should send for aid to such or such and when they came they should send out most of the Town to joyn with the enemy against those that came to help them What we would say of such people Lord just thus are we We have a world of corruptions and temptations sin and hell and Satan all beset us all beset us and violently assault us we pray for the help of God against them day after day We send our prayers to Heaven for assistance Well God doth send his holy Spirit to help this poor soul In the Ministery of the Word tels us
carnal tears and one great cause of my grief and part of my misery is that I can weep no more sometimes indeed tears stand in mine eyes when I consider these things Lord give me faith O give me faith I feel a deal of Atheism in mine heart Mine heart is so full of corruption of all kinde and all degrees that I can feel no bottome of this stinking ditch Mine Imaginations is divers times a through-fare for Satans blasphemous thoughts which my soul abhors I may even sit down and spend the remainder of my wicked life in weeping and wailing and wringing of my hands and tearing off the hairs of my head My sad soul may say to my God Art thou quite gone from me have all my hopes of thee been as dreams and empty shadows unto me and hast thou shown me so much of heaven and wilt thou make hell more terrible and bitter to me Shall thy sweet mercies be turned into the gall of Aspes to me not only to be bitter but deadly I have cause I have cause Lord to mingle my drink with my tears to water my couch with weeping Thou art too great a God to be dallied withall and what do I else As our dearest Friends though we never so much delighted in their company while they were living yet we are afraid to be alone with them they are a terronr to us after the souls have left their earthly Tabernacles So my praiers while they were living praiers were a great comfort to my poor soul but now my praiers are without life and my supplications are dead they are a terrour to me they look gashly upon me and I upon them Meditat. XII My dear God thouart not moved with words if we had the tongue of Men and Angels if we could speak as never man spake if our hearts meant no more then they do what would our vain words do I am ever weary of my life because of my corruptions I can go no where nor do any thing but my corruptions follow me and tire me even out of my patience O that I could weep over my soul and weep over my praiers to see how dead they are which way to turn I know not I have praied a thousand times for another heart and yet mine heart is as hard as a stone and so full of hypocrisie that there is a world of hypocrisie in my confessions of hypocrisie Lord shall I cast away my confidence and lay down my weapons and put off mine armour because my corruptions are so strong and impetuous and deaden my very soul But alas what am I weary of not of my sinnes but of the accusations of my conscience that will not let me alone Blessed be thy Name that I am troubled that I do not live holily and yet I will strive to live holily Lord mine heart is ertangled in the snares of the world Blessed Saviour thou which hast overcome the world deliver me from the cares and love of the world Alas what good do my tears do me Dost thou bottle up such tears such puddle water in thy bottles Let the bowels of thy compassion yern within the towards my poor soul It is full of sin but my sinne is my sorrow though my sorrow it self is sinful if thou standest as a stranger to me I must give over my self for lost then I may say farewell praiers better to say farewell then to adde to my former sins a greater guilt by defiling my praiers that are as the Chariots to carry out my soul into the bosome of God What am I to stand against corruption or temptations I am no more able to overcome nay to resist them then to remove Mountains I have sinned away my comforts and sinned away my joys and sinned away mine hopes and even my God if thy mercies be not greater and what remains for my poor soul to do but to sit down in sorrow and even to mourn until my soul be heavy unto death It had been better for me that I had not been one to shew the way to others Nay but oh my God that is best for me that thou hast done for me Blessed God do but make me thine Meditat. XIII Alas Oh my soul may not I justly spend the remainder of my daies in sighing to perceive my good God from whose sweet presence I have in former times had so much grace and comfort to be such a stranger now to men and what is worse mine heart so senselesse of his absence The time hath been when myheart hath almost bled within me to think what a miserable condition I should be in if ever it should come to passe that it should be thus Lord why dost thou absent thy self from my poor soul if I were in a desertion of comforts I were in a farre better condition but to be in a desertion of graces and not to be troubled is a sad condition Me thinks I see my stock of grace grow weaker and weaker and more and more to languish as one that is dying the pulse grows weaker and weaker until at last it be no moee O Lord what to say I do not know alas I cannot but call and cry and pray Lord if ever thou wilt take pity upon a poor miserable speechlesse sinner Lord If thou wilt that I may overcome Lord I cannot get mine heart to be content to be damned and indeed since then I must eternally be separated from thee I do not desire to get mine heart to be content but to struggle against it as long as I am able Meditat. XIV To have Satan and corruption come and beset me as soon as I awake and to follow me all the day long and to go to bed with me and to keep me waking to have no respite is a sad condition When I should awake with my God my good God who kept me and watched over me whilst I slept to have Satan stand ready and hold his temptations before mine eyes which way soever I look and to prevail so far with me as at last to make me scarce to hate the sin he tempts me to I feel in my spiritual part an utter abhorring of the sinne I would give ten thousand worlds rather then commit the sinne and yet I have much ado to refrain alas can my secure soul live Meditat. XV. I am in such a wretched temper as to be willing to offend my God and when I go about to grieve sorrow is far from me nay the grief which sometimes I feel is not strong enough to conquer the temptation when tears stand in mine eyes to consider the miserable condition of my soul in being so prone to sin the temptation encreaseth To hear one of thy servants groaning under thy hand and then to stand parlying with temptation and not rather be afraid that the same affliction c. Lord I am in thy hand for affliction lay what thou wilt upon me I must bear it and I would bear it patiently
this dulnesse and deadnesse of heart that is the just reason why I shed them and if thou shalt once purifie and inflame mine heart by faith and love I shall shed more tears for my wandring thoughts in praier then now I do for all the abominations I am guilty of Alas Lord the ordinary daies of thy Saints are farre more holy then the daies I set apart for speciall service of thee And their thoughts in the midst of their worldly businesses are more devout and zealous then my thoughts in my prayers were alwaies with thee I scarce did any thing though almost of never so small moment but the reason why I did it this or that way was because it was some way or other more for thy glory Lord It is not thy fault for thou dost wait to shew mercy whether my wretched heart will consent to it or no This I do set down as an infallible trurh and let all the world give thee the glory of it All thy waies are holy just and good and thou dost stretch out thine arms to embrace us it is our fault that we do not run into thy bosome the infidelity and other corruptions that are in our bosomes make us think that thou art not willing to receive us and so we not coming we want that experimentall knowledge of thee that would if we had it make us not so timorous of comng to thee as we are Meditat. XXI Before I begin to write I know I have more cause to write in bloud or tears then in ink Can a Mother forget her childe It is not Can a childe forget the Mother nor is it Can a Mother her childe if the childe forget her or Can there be any case wherein the Mother can forget her childe Lord do thoo awaken mine heart for it is asleep Lord do thou raise mine heart for it is dead Do thou thaw mine heart for it is frozen Lord thou art that celestial fire that enflames all thine Angels with love I have no way but to come before thy presence in hope that at the last I shall be thawed if not inflamed thou wilt not put out the smoaking snuffe of a candle I am such an one enlightned and enflamed though now I send forth nothing but an unsavoury stanch What shall I stand imperfect as I am thus speaking what I may and what I have to say to my God Lord thou hast commanded in thy Word that if an adulterer defile a woman and she cry not out then she shall be put to death Lord infidelity hypocrisie and vain-glory are come to undoe me to defile my soul and they have almost perswaded my soul not to cry out to be ravisht is a great affliction but to embrace the adulterer is an abomination If I cry to men for succour if I go to Ordinances alas the adulterer is a strong man he hath locked the doors of my soul and none can break them open but thou only Lord doe not stand knocking at the door of my heart for the strong man will not and I am kept so fast by my corruptions I cannot come to let thee in Lord break open the doors and come in to help me before I am utterly undone as it was with the Levites Concubine so will it be with my poor soul corruption and corruption and sin after sin will so abuse her that she will be at last dead Alas methinks I look upon my poor soul as one looks upon a Ship tossed among rocks in the Seas one sees it and pities it but knows not how to help it there comes a wave and carries it with violence among the midst of the rocks and makes it reel and stagger like a drunken man and then all in the Ship are fain to pump and toil to save their lives at last it is dasht in peeces and all fain to get upon broke peeces of the Ship to swim to the shore if it may be my soul is even labouring for life Lord what wilt thou do wilt thou be as a man astonisht and as a mighty man that cannot help then I am undone then I may say if thou wilt not then farewell all my duties farewell all my graces and all my comforts which I have had in the dear embraces of my God Ah must I not pray but with my tongue Must I have no more comforts but what poor creatures can give me Lord if I must perish let me perish in thy way let me convert many unto thee Though I know my damnation shall be greater if I perish for living so contrary to mine own doctrine Lord I am a poor miserable man and a more miserable Christian thou art I cannot possibly imagine what but I hope Lord I shall know these daies of ignorance and sin will not alwaies last when my change comes I shall no more sin and repent and repent and sin as I do now Oh my corruptions I hope one day I shall leave you all in the grave behinde me The day is coming when while I am praising God you shall not come and lie as a talent of lead upon my soul and hinder my flight come Lord Jesus come quickly Come while my soul is filled with joy to think of thy coming O my God thou art enough for me enough enough my soul can hold no more Lord I am afraid of the joys sometimes I have to think of thee tears for my sinnes are fitter for me then tears of joy yet I dare not refuse them nay I cannot if I would they are so sweet so sweet Heaven is but a greater measure of them Lord thou art enough enough for them that love thee Meditat. XXII To see a dead man arraied with all the richest clothes still there is more horrour to behold him then delight So my poor Soul looks gashly in all the duties I perform I have a cold and dead soul for all them and more terrour there is in the deadnesse then there is comfort in the multitude of them this I know by experience that one looks upon hell upon whatsoever one looks but up-Christ yet Christ is not sweet unto me my dear Saviour to whom I was so dear Lord Jesus give me a heart that may feel thy sweetnesse I am convinced that thou art so but my poor heart hath not enough tasted the sweetnesse of this Truth that all things are dross and dung in comparison of Christ Lord here is mine estate mine health mine life my liberty and all that I have and had I more I would freely give all give but such a heart as I desire and the same will I consecrate unto thee in spirituall affections all my daies now I think thus with my self When I was most desirous of and addicted to humane learning it was wonderfull delightfull to me to be instructed in some new truth or to have some difficult question clearly resolved To reade the Mathematicks was wonderfull delightfull because they prove such strange things
soon out it hath not substance enough to nourish and maintain what it begets For Creature-Excellencies are not strong enough to keep up the delight we take in them but thou Lord art love and thou art such a treasure of excellencies that the poor soul makes new discoveries of those treasures every day To all Eternity thou art enough to keep alive and in full strength all the love and joys and praises of Saints and Angels Lord thou art enough to answer thine own love but what am I that I should speak of thee thou art so glorious that I am afraid to speak of thee Meditat. XXXIV Lord I call and thou dost not answer I am even tired out if thou dost not support I sink under the burthen I long and look to see thy beauty but I cannot behold nor perceive one glimpse that thou art excellent I see by the eye of faith but thine excellencies do not affect me All my praiers are turned into this Lord shew me Christ and shew me him whom my soul loveth for I have heard of him and the fame of his excellencies have come unto me yet mine eyes have not seen him I think with my self Surely Christ manifesting himself and to be filled with all the fulnesse of God and to have a conversation in heaven must needs signifie more then ever I have experienced in my self For such poor things as I have found wrought in my soul cannot fill up those expressions Then I hear of those whose lives are spiritual and Christ-like not glorious in outward mortifications Thou art blamelesse that way speaking of such things which God hath wrought for them and in them which I have not found but are the very same things which are in my view and I follow after to attain but cannot Then from their relation of the Lords dealings with them I perceive that God did humble them more before he did discover himself unto them then ever he hath as yet humbled me so that I finde no rest day nor night in my spirit and yet though I am thus restlesse in seeking after something which I cannot know what it is I seek for I cannot discern any true sincere constant love to Christ He neither lets me know that he loves me nor that I love him so that I stand amazed and know not what to do and still by the help of God I will not cease to cry and call upon him for whom my soul I doubt not but would love if he discover his beauties and love unto me and work them on my heart I seek for one who I cannot tell who he is before I finde him then I shall know and shall tell to all who he is and set forth his excellencies though they shal as little understand me as I do them who declare the things that God hath wrought for them Meditat. XXXV There is not such an one in the world as I am that I know Publicans and harlots I justifie them I in the midst of means of Ordinances and mercies in the midst of the flames of love nay when thou laiedst on me that affliction that is now fresh bleeding in mine eyes or rather despised and forgotten I should have learnt obedience by things I suffered and I have done as if I were to learn to sinne by them Thou hast chastised me with rods and I have put the sting of sinne into them and have made them scorpions Thou sendest them for Antidotes and I have turned them into poyson Lord teach me what it is wherein thou art so offended to leave me thus Lord I beleeve thou hast pardoned me but small is my comfort when thou pardonest sinne but subduest it not Meditat. XXXVI Lord I do so evidently finde my self unable to judge of truths or to resist temptations that I almost nay altogether lie at the mercy of every temptation and to be carried about with the winde of every vain doctrine if thou dost not stand by me what should I tell thee the secret puddle of my heart I am weary of the stench and filthinesse of it there is not a prayer but they meet me at it and lie as a talent of lead upon me If mine heart were all on fire with thy love these things could not be I sometimes have thoughts rising in my heart that are wicked proud and foolish thoughts I begin to be offended that I begging for the manifestations of thy love yet have them not but those thoughts no sooner begin to arise but I consider What am I that thou shouldest give me thy loves and how can I expect the manifestations of thy love when I will not give thee my loves but let them run waste upon the creature How many times do I choose to do any thing rather then spend my time in Meditation and Prayer nay to do nothing and be idle For although thou lovest us first yet thou dost not usually discover thy thoughts of love to a soul before she hath made over her love and her felf unto thee then I think thou canst by the power of thy Spirit bring in my heart my soul and my love and that usually ere thou dost ravish the soul with the discoveries of thy love this I know and let all the world know it that whatsoever wicked thoughts arise in my weak heart which I cannot answer I know that all thy waies are holy just and good Lord what shall I give for the sheddings abroad of love in my heart that which should be given for it were it at the utmost parts of the world I could fetch it thence But Lord the price of it is already paid 't is near unto thee even at thy right hand O thou most High he hath paid for this mercy by his bloud long ago and my praiers thou requirest not as a price Lord fill me with these spiritual supplications that I may give thee no rest nor take any rest my self until I have found him whom my soul loveth Come Lord Jesus come quickly Meditat. XXXVII O Lord beat me and drive me with storms and tempests I am come unto thee like the Prodigall Son for all but that which most of all I should have a spiritual sorrow ragged and tatter'd and undone My sins and misery are like his not my sorrow For me to see my self languishing my graces daily grow weaker my love colder and even almost to be speechlesse in praier Alas the sorrow that I have is rather bewailing my misery then my sinne I know not what it is Lord but thou dost Sure I am my condition is sad and I am sad and my sadnesse is all the poor remains of comfort that I have and yet I no sooner begin to take any comfort in my grief but I perceive so much hypocrisie in my grief that the poor spark of comfort that I have is put out Alas tears of bloud were fitter for me then dry eyes O Lord must every trifle steal away my heart from thee
must thou much desire and endeavour for those things which no way further thee in this great businesse of knowing serving and following God but they are to be accounted superfluous and frivolous 2. Consider the folly and madnesse of those who live no otherwise then as if they had been created for no other end then to drink and eat and sleep and dance and game or to get riches and such like fooleries Certainly if these people were asked whether they did in their consciences think that God created them that they might spend their lives in dancing c. they could not say yes None can imagine that hath any understanding that at the day of judgement God will ask them why they did not dance more and game more and gain more riches 3. Consider seriously with thy self whether thou livest sutable to the end of thy Creation think with thy self that when that time which thou spendest in eating drinking sleeping recreation visits vanities is taken from thy life what a small pittance is left for God and for the works of thy particular calling nay thy sleeping eating drinking recreation should all be done some way or other to enable and fit thee the better for the service of God But alas how seldome is it that thou hast thought of fitting thy self for Gods service by eating drinking c. Nay how many times hast thou made thy self unfit for Gods service by such things Now before thou goest any further be fully convinced of these truths and if any scruple should remain which cannot though a man be but truly rationall argue and pray them away for though it may be some Objections may be too hard for thy arguments which notwithstanding seldome comes to passe since thy consideration must be of truths so plain evident and obvious which all grant yet no scruples will be too hard for thy praiers Affectione 1. Be ashamed and confounded within thy self that thou hast lived so contrary to thine own principles and that thou hast minded that little or nothing in doing of it as a thing by the bye which now thou dost but seriously think of it thou plainly seest to be the main businesse of thy life saying thus Alas O my God what did I think of when I thought not of thee What was I mindeful of when I forgot thee Alas O my Soul how comes it to passe that we thought of these things no sooner 'T is a strange thing that our hearts and the world should so far deceive us that we should prefer eveny trifling thing before that which concerns us more then ten thousand worlds We have served the world which was not made but to serve us 2. Abhor thy life past Well I am resolved to leave you ye vain and sinful pleasures I will no longer dote upon you you have but too long bewitcht my soul I might have had a thousand holy thoughts and praiers and treasures of almes laid up for Eternity which I am sure I should not have repented of when I come to die and you vanities have took up my time and stole away my heart and thoughts from these things Well I have enough of you I have done with you for the rest of my strength and daies I will give unto my God 3. Turn thy self to God and say Blessed God wilt thou accept of the service of a poor wretch that hath spent so much of his time and strength upon base lusts and vanities Nay surely Lord If thou wilt accept of such a wretch as I am such a heart such love such service as I have I will give to thee and for the time to come thou shalt be the very joy of my soul and the deliciousnesse of my thoughts and dost thou indeed entreat and importune me to be reconciled how wonderfull is thy mercy that notwithstanding I provok't thee hitherto daily to thy face yet that thou shouldest follow after me to embrace me whereas what could be expected but that thou shouldest pursue me to destroy me Resolutions Well by the blessing of God I am resolved that though heretofore I have spent whole daies in such and such like recreations which at best are but vanities for this moneth I will either not use such and such recreations at all or at least spend no more time any day in them then I do in praier and meditation and I hope one day the Lord will work in me such a heavenly frame of spirit that praier and meditation shall be in stead of a thousand recreations David was of that temper for he saith that he will go to God his exceeding joy and that the Law of God was dearer to him then thousands of gold or silver and that his heart was ready to break for the very desires and longings that he had after God O my Soul that will be a rare time when it shall be thus with us Why should David love God more then we He forgave David much but he hath forgiven us more well O my soul if thou wilt pray hard and follow hard after God thou little knowest what he will do for thee and the joys that he hath laid up for them that love him even in this world are unspeakable and glorious Conclusion 1. Pray Lord thou knowest the decitfulnesse of my heart the strength of my corruptions and the multitude of snares and temptations which encompasse me on every side especally when I am in worldly employments in company thou knowest how subject holy flames are to go out therefore be thou pleased by the holy breathings of thy Spirit to keep these holy fervours of love from being quencht 't is not the strength of my resolutions that can enable me to resist temptations if I am not kept by the mighty power of thee my God I am lost 2. Praise God blessed be thou O God for any heavenly motion or desire that hath been wrought in me thou might'st have suffered me as thou dost thousands I have provoked thee as much as they never to be convinced of or affected with these truths t is thy wonderful mercy that thou didst make me for such a blessed end as the enjoyment of thy self and much greater mercy that thou hast let me know so much but most of all that thou hast given me a heart to desire and endeavour after it Blesse the Lord O my Soul 3. Acknowledge thy failings alas Lord whatsoever is wrought in me that 's good had been farre greater but that I am green wood to the sparks of thy love Lord pardon the iniquity of my holy services My highest and most inflamed thoughts of thee are unworthy of thee it is well that I have thee to love whom I need not fear loving too much After the Meditation is ended 1. Think with thy self which of these truths or what passage of this Meditation did most warm thy heart and affect thee and fix it and treasure it up in thy thoughts keeping it as it were a nosegay in
methods fright the ignorant 1. This is the very method of those Meditations by which every one that is brought home to God is converted For the first thing in conversion is our being convinced of some Truths which conviction raiseth affections for if the truths of God end in conviction and go no further nay if they end in affections only and never come to resolutions of shunning evil and doing good conversion can never be perfected as for example One is convinced that he is a miserable undone wretch by reason of originall and actuall abomination Upon this conviction fear and sorrow are raised yet if these do not work in us a firm resolution of leaving those sinnes we are yet in our sinnes and unconverted 3. There are severall things for the concluding of Meditation as shall appear CHAP. V. Directions for the working of our hearts to be convinced of and affectedwith the presence of God 1. FOR being convinced of and affected with the presence of God it may thus be wrought 1. We are to consider that God is present every where as truly really and essentially as he is in heaven For God did not create heaven to confine him but to manifest his presence for the Heaven of Heavens are not able to contain him for God is neither included by nor excluded from any place and though Jacob saith Surely the Lord was in this place and I knew it not Gen. 28.16 yet we must not imagine that Jacob was ignorant of that truth but did not actually consider it but David in the 139. Psalm is clear in explaining and clearing up the omnipresence of God 2. We must consider that God doth more peculiarly observe his people while they are performing of heavenly duties whether it be while they are speaking unto him or he speaking unto them he doth then more especially observe the motion and frame of their hearts as when we are in any company we do more especially look upon and observe those to whom we speak or who speak to us yet this is to be understood not as if God did observe us more at one time then another in respect of Gods knowledge it self but thus that God is much more offended with us if our carriage and frame of heart be more irreverent and unholy in the time of prayer and Meditation then at such times as we are in the works of our particular calling 3. We may consider with our selves that Christ doth actually behold us especially in these duties of holinesse for it is not the distance of place that doth hin-Christs knowledge and exact observing of us Little did Nathanael think that Christ saw him under the Fig-tree Nathanael did not see Christ nor was he corporally present then yet Christ behold Nathanael when he praied so Christ beheld Steven before the heavens were opened and the opening of the heavens was not that thereby Christ might be enabled the better to behold Steven but that Steven might thereby be the better enabled to see that Christ looked on him without all controversie God knows and observes with what reverence faith love c. we pray for else our praiers would be in vain and our faith also vain for how could he give us according to our faith if he knew not how much our faith were If the inward frame of our hearts were not observed by him then an hypocrite that hath better expressions should get more by his prayers then a true Nathanael that hath a better heart 4. Suppose that thou hadst lived in Christs time or suppose that Christ were now in England consider with what joy reverence and confidence thou wouldest go to him for the pardon of thy sins or for any other mercy thou stoodst in need of Thou maist go so to him now his distance from thee in respect of corporall presence doth not make him lesse able to know thy wants or hear thy praiers nor his being now glorified makes him lesse willing to grant them then if he were bodily present in the room with thee in the form of a Servant as he was once at Jerusalem the glory of Christ doth not hinder his love and goodnesse for Chtist is the expresse image of his Father and God Attributes do not hinder one another The Majesty of God doth not set bounds unto his goodnesse and make that finite nor doth his goodnesse make his Majesty lesse glorious his goodnesse makes his Majesty more amiable and his Majesty makes his goodnesse more wonderfull So neither doth the exaltation of Christ cause him to abate any thing of his goodnesse unto his people but if any way his love be altered it is by being made more then it was and when Christ was upon earth you must have come to him by faith or you could obtain no mercy from him and by faith though he be in heaven you may obtain any mercy now You may consider any one or two or more of these considerations until your heart be so convinced of and affected with the presence of God that you may thereby be the better fitted for the carrying on the duty of Meditation more effectually CHAP. VI. Concerning the Preparatory Praier that is to be used before Meditation THE next Preparatory consideration is Praier and it is to be performed in these words or to like purpose Lord my designe in this duty of Meditation is not to be an hour sequestred from worldly employments for that were to be idle an hour and to encrease my sinnes not my graces but my businesse at this time is to be so convinced and affected with those spirituall Truths revealed in thy Word that I may fully resolve by thy strength and power to reform my life because I can neither understand the things that belong to my peace nor understanding them be convinced of the certainty and truth of them Nay Lord though my understanding be enlightened yet without thee mine affections cannot be enflamed I can neither know resolve nor perrform what is good without thee for from thee comes both the will and the deed of thy good pleasure I beseech thee Lord that thou wouldest give me thy grace to make conscience of performing this duty with my whole strength and not carelesly and perfunctorily And Lord do thou enlighten me with and convince me of thy Truths and so affect my heart with the love of holinesse and hatred of sinne c. that I may thereby be enabled fully firmly notwithstanding all the opposition that the flesh world or devil can make to run the waies of thy Commandements with joy and with speed and when thou hast wrought in me the will so to do give me also the deed and that I may not trust to the strength of my resolutions but to the continuall gracious assistance of thy Spirit for the performance of those things that through thee I shall resolve to do Holy and blessed God Christ hath sent me wishing me to come to thee in his Name for any mercies
I stand in need of grant these things which I have begged for the Lord Jesus sake Amen This or a prayer to the like purpose thou art to put up unto God but it is to be done with thy whole heart for thou must know that it is by the strength which thou shalt get from God by prayer whereby thou shalt be enabled to perform this or any other duty profitably for it is he that teacheth us to profit he that begins a holy duty without God will end it without God also It is a dangerous thing to think that we can by our natural parts learning or by the strength of grace already received without Gods further assistance perform any thing that can please God or edifie our own sonls For though our Mountain be made strong yet if he shall hide his face there will be trouble We may with much more sense say Now the Sunne shines so bright and the air is so clear that now we can do well enough for a while though the Sunne be ecclipsed then to say though our hearts be never so much inflamed with the love of God Now we are so filled and inflamed by his love we shall do well enough by our own strength for the present we need not Gods further assistance Give us but fewell matter to meditate of and we shall be able to continue and encrease our flames Do not account it a burthen but a mercy and priviledge that God hath necessitated and commanded thee alwaies to draw strength from him CHAP. VII Of Consideration 1. THey must be plain Considerations not intricate and abstruse For the main end of Meditation being the affecting of our heart and reforming of our lives and not informing of our understandings our considerations should be so plain that they may be without difficulty understood 2. It must be certain and evident not controversal and doubtful for the end of Meditation is not properly to encrease our knowledge but to improve our knowledge 3. Much lesse should our considerations be curious and nice speculations or if we choose any Book by reading whereof to help our Meditation we must not choose such as are filled with flourishes and Rhetorick for let a truth be drest never so curiously the wit and eloquence wherewith the truth is cloathed leaves the truth before it comes to the heart as some meats that are made in curious works are spoiled of all those curiosities before they come to the stomack and the Bee lights not upon the Rose which hath the freshest colour and the sweetest smell but upon the thyme that is an Herb of little Beauty Besides Eloquence to them that meditate is much like pictures in Books to Children they neglect their lesson to look on their pictures they will be looking on the pictures while they should be getting their lesson so the fancy will be playing with the Eloquence when the heart should be feeding on and affected with the truths we reade The lesse time the truth staies in the Understanding the better for the work of the Understanding in this businesse is not to retain but to convey the Truths to the heart As Physicians use when they are to give medicines to cure any disease in the bladder they give such as may soonest come to the part affected for if they stay by the way they lose their vertue before they come to the part which they should cure So if the Understanding shall stay dallying with the Eloquence or searching out the meaning or certainty of the truth it considers any long while the heart will lie cold and unaffected all that while It is somewhat like that Story concerning Musitians that were to play before the Emperour of the Turks who were so long tuning their Instruments which they should have done before that he would not stay to hear their musick Therefore let the Truths you consider of to raise affections be plain certain nourishing 4. The 4th Rule is that in case any doubt ariseth upon a plain known Truth for Satan will be subject to cast in doubts against the most evident Truths then do as the Arch-angel did with Satan you may enter the lists with Satan and it may be when you have a little considered and disputed the matter the mist may vanish and the Sun shine clear and Satan being resisted will presently fly but if Satan shall still wrangle and your blasphemous doubts shall not be removed then dispute no more but say as the Arch-angel did the Lord rebuke thee Satan As a woman that is attempted to be ravished will strive and struggle a while and if she findes that she can quickly get loose she flies but otherwise she cries out for help The Arch-angel first disputed but when that would not speedily prevail appealed unto God To this purpose it is good to be exceedingly well grounded in Truths from the Word of God for that is the Sword of the Spirit and that by which our Saviour silenced Satan in all his temptations 'T is a dangerous thing to dispute with Satan by humane reason we must put on the Armour of God if we will be able to stand in the evil day of temptation and when all is done to stand 5. The fifth Rule is that we should not over-multiply our considerations but as soon as by considering of the Truths of God we finde our hearts strongly affected then we are to passe over that part but this Caution must be observed that we must not as soon as we finde our heart never so little affected leave off our considerations The Bee will not go from the flower as long as any honey is easily drawn out of it and indeed it is a temptation which the people of God ought to take notice of That Satan is subject to make one passe over duties before we have drawn half the strength of them as for example When we are confessing of our sinnes as soon as ever our hearts begin in the least measure to be humbled he fils them with joy such joy may generally be suspected to be from Satan or our own naughty hearts not from God Corn when it springs up too fast and grows rank husbandmen cut it down a corrasive that is laid on to eat dead flesh must not be taken off as soon as it begins to smart the Wheat in the stony ground did soonest spring up We should let our considerations take deep root and not passe over to affections and resolutions as soon as ever they take hold of our heart but it is alwaies to be remembred that in case our affections be very much inflamed as soon as ever we begin our considerations we are to yeeld to the Inspirations of God and to follow the leading of the Spirit for this method that is set down is not to binde up and limit the extraordinary working of the Spirit of God but if our hearts be only a little moved we must do as I have said not leave blowing the