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A42887 God give you joy The hearty wish of a Christian friend to the bridegroom and the bride. A marriage-present for the new-married-couple: containing considerations and advices, in order to perswade young married people to begin the married life in the fear of the Lord. With directions and prayers. With plainness, intended for the meanest understanding. By one that desires to be a true son of the church of Christ, as by the gospel established. 1691 (1691) Wing G906A; ESTC R223684 39,458 63

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Adam and Eve and didst sanctifie and joyn them together in marriage pour upon us the riches of thy Grace sanctifie and bless us that we may please thee both in body and Soul and live together in holy love to our lives end Amen These you may use or so many of them as you think best only take heed that you may with the words express the true and hearty desires of your Souls to God alwayes concluding with the Lords Prayer as our Saviour in his Gospel hath taught us to pray saying OUR Father which art in heaven hallowed be thy name thy Kingdom come Thy Will be done in earth as it is in heaven Give us this day our daily bread And forgive us our trespasses as we forgive them that trespass against us and lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil for thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory for ever and ever Amen And then add The Grace of our Lord Jesus Christ and the Love of God and the fellowship of the holy Ghost be with us evermore Amen A prayer to obtain Children to be used by those for whom it is necessary O Merciful God and heavenly Father by whose gracious gift mankind is increased we beseech thee assist us both with thy blessing that we may neither of us be barren but both of us fruitful in Children and also may live together so long in godly love and honesty that we may see our Children Christianly and Vertuously brought up to thy praise and honour thro' Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen Or instead of these you may make use of either of those that follow which of them you shall think most suitable to your condition to make known the desire of your heart to the heart-searching God The married persons joynt request unto God taken out of Mr. Hieron's help to Devotion THou O most blessed God didst first ordain the married state and it is thy providence by which we which were two are now made one flesh having mutually resigned our selves either to other by our entrance into this holy League It is the desire of our Souls to live together to thy glory and to the contentment each of other This we cannot do without thee for of our selves besides sin we can do nothing unto thee therefore do we commend our most earnest and humble suit that it may please thee so to besprinkle our Souls with the dew of thy grace that from thence may spring a plentiful increase of Sobriety of righteousness and of holiness in our lives Allay in us all sensual and brutish love purifying and sanctifying our affections one toward another that we may in nothing dishonour this honourable state nor pollute the bed of marriage which thou thy self in thy word hast called undefiled but may use this thine ordinance in that holy sort that carnal lusts may be slaked and subdued not increased or inflamed thereby Endue us with a godly care to acquaint our selves with thy blessed word that we may know and understand what duty is required at our hands what authority tempered with love and compassion and freed from all bitterness is committed to the husband what obedience and submission with reverence is commended in the wife what faithfulness in matrimonial duties either to other is enjoyned what providence and care is expected of the man and what assistance and help of the woman And when we know and have learned these things grant that it may be our study to practise them that so the husband may be as a faithful guide to his wife and the wife a crown and credit to her husband Make us wise to observe the natures and dispositions one of another that in all lawful things the one may seek to please and content the other the one may know how to bear with and to forbear the other not winking at any evil in one another but discreetly chusing the fittest opportunities for mutual admonishing without all shews of tyranny in the one or of presumption in the other Open our hearts that we may faithfully and chearfully communicate one to the other that sweetness which we find in heavenly things that sowe may go hand in hand towards heaven And that our chief love and delight either in other may be grounded upon the hope we have that we are heirs together of the grace of life In our family link us together in one common care to oversee the wayes of our houshold to seek the promoting and advancing of thy Kingdom the good instruction and education of our Children and servants Finally O Lord so unite and joyn us together in fidelity of affection that we may ever devote our selves to the procuring of the present and eternal good one of another that so living here comfortably we may reign with thee perpetually in that thy Kingdom which the blood of thy Son hath prepared for those that love and fear thy name Unto which Kingdom O Lord reserve us even for thy Son's sake and for thy mercies sake Amen Another to the same purpose O Lord our God who art pleased to look in mercy on thy poor creatures thro' the Lord Jesus Christ and dost promise to hear the prayers made to thee in his name we beseech to hear our prayers and supplications incline our hearts to pray and be pleased to hear and answer us graciously for Christ Jesus sake Thou O blessed Lord hast ordained the state of marriage and by thy good providence hast brought us together in that holy bond that we might be meet helps for one another And now O Lord we beseech thee frame both our hearts to holy desires to be helpful to each other both in soul and body And help us by thy Grace that we may live together in holy love and assist each other in faith and repentance and sincere obedience to thy holy word and will That we may live together in thy fear and be both of us ever in thy favour Put it into our hearts good Lord daily to pray and call upon thy holy name one with another and one for another Enable us to read thy holy word diligently enlighten our understandings that we may thereby know thy will and quicken us by thy Grace and good Spirit that we may be doers of thy Word And that being taught thereby we may learn truly to sanctifie thy Sabbaths and to give up our selves to thee our God heartily and entirely in frequent serious and solemn renewing the Covenant at thy holy Table in the blessed Sacrament of the Lords Supper and that we may live together as in Covenant with the Lord and do all that good thou hast appointed us in this state and condition of life to which thou hast called us Pardon we beseech thee all our Sins for Christ Jesus sake And all that vanity whereby we may have ensnared each other since our first acquaintance either in thought word or action savouring too much of the flesh and unbecoming
to see my young one brought up in thy faith and fear That I may dedicate it to thy self in holy Baptism And instruct it betimes in thy holy word that I and those thou givest me may be thine for ever Lord hear and help thy poor handmaid that has no help but thee To thee I desire to make my request 's known with thanksgiving for all thy mercies To thee O Lord I commit my whole concern as to a faithful creator Do thou O Lord hear and help and forgive me and do for me what in thy heavenly wisdom seems best Even more then I can ask or think and all for the sake and thro' the mediation of thy beloved Son the Lord Jesus Christ Amen A prayer to be used in a family either morning or evening by changing the conclusion O Lord Almighty God King of Glory who from the height of thy habitation dost behold all the inhabitants of the earth considering all their wayes and providing for them of thy goodness we O Lord have received abundantly of thy bounty and loving kindness for which we desire to return praise and thanksgving And now we beg the continuance of thy mercy to us Thou commandest us to call on thee And Lord whither can we come but unto thee O Lord our strength and our redeemer O shed abroad thy love in our hearts and stir up our Souls to lay hold on thee that we may not seek thy face in vain Lord give ear to our prayer answer us graciously Lord we confess we are unworthy to call on thy holy name by reason of those many sins with which we are defiled full of corruption by nature having sin dwelling in us and alwayes present with us by which we offend daily both in thought word and deed We have broken thy holy law by neglecting those duties which thou hast commanded us and doing those things which thou hast forbidden And we have added to our sins much slightness and contempt not regarding thy wrath much impenitency being unsensible of the filth of sin and carelesness in not seeking to be cleansed from sin thro' the boold of Christ Jesus tho' thy mercy hath provided that redemption for us O Lord to us belongeth confusion of face because we have sinned against thee shouldest thou Lord be extream to mark all that is done amiss who could abide it But with thee there is mercy and forgiveness that thou mayest be feared thou hast appointed to poor sinners an Advocate thy Son Jesus Christ the Righteous who is the propitiation of our sins and sits at thy right hand to make intercession for us In his name O Lord and for his sake we beg that thou wouldest pardon all our sins and blot out all our transgressions Give unto us that true and lively faith that sincere and hearty repentance that true conversion and new obedience that our sins may be blotted out and we justified freely by thy grace thro' the redemption that is in Jesus Christ And being reconciled unto thee thro' the blood of thy Son be pleased to take us into thy protection and defend us against all the power of sin and deceits of Satan O let not sin reign in our mortal bodies that we should obey it in the lusts thereof but let the blood of Christ purge our consciences from dead works to serve the living God That every one of our Souls may be zealous of doing good to thy glory Teach every one of us to know our several duties and by thy grace enable us to do them to thy glory and the good and Comfort of one another Bestow upon us the blessings of this life so far as may be for our Souls good give unto us continue with us renew for us bodily health and strength and all our senses Provide for us food and raiment and make us content with the portion thou givest and what in thy wisdom thou seest fit to deny us in the things of this life teach us to bear the want with humility and contented submission and be pleased to make it up unto us in Spiritual blessings that we may use the world without abusing it and improve every providence to thy glory Good Lord prepare us for our latter end enable us so to love that we may die in the Lord and live for ever with our God Be pleased to bless thy whole Church especially this nation in turning every one of us from our iniquities that our sins may be pardoned our Souls sanctified our lives reformed to thy glory praise so that we may enjoy peace and truth in our dayes having thy Gospel still continued among us To that end we beseech the bless all our governours with holy wisdom and all the ministers of thy word especially thy Servant under who 's ministry we are that he may faithfully deliver thy word to the edification of our Souls Comfort all the afflicted with mercies suitable to their distresses particularly such as we know or those that desire to be remembred by us Lord Sanctifie all their afflictions to their Souls good Bless all our friends and relations with renewed sanctified hearts and lives that we may have Godly comfort in them they in us all of us in Jesus Christ our Lord. Conclusion for Morning WE bless thee O Lord for that thou hast kept us in peace safety this last night and refresht our bodies with quiet rest and sleep we pray thee continue thy goodness to us this day keep us in all our thoughts words and actions from all sin Enable us for our work and business that we may do good in our place keep us from sickness and every sad providence bring us to the evening in peace that our Souls may praise thee And in the end of our lives receive us to thy everlasting kingdom for the sake of Jesus Christ our Lord in whose name and words we sum up all our desires as himself hath taught us to pray saying Conclusion for Evening WE thank thee O Lord for thy good providence over us this day past for keeping of us and providing for us Pardon we beseech thee all our sins and failings this day keep us in peace and safety this night refresh our bodies with sleep convenient for us bring us to the morning in peace and be present with us when we awake Guide and preserve us the next day all our dayes nights that we may finish our lives in peace in thy fear and holy joy and enter into thy everlasting kingdom in heaven for Christ Jesus sake our only Lord and Redeemer in whose holy name and words we conclude praying as himself hath taught us saying OUR Father which art in heaven hallowed be thy name thy Kingdom come Thy Will be done in earth as it is in heaven Give us this day our daily bread And forgive us our trespasses as we forgive them that trespass against us And lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil For thine is the Kingdom And the power And the glory for ever and ever Amen FINIS
God give you Joy THE HEARTY WISH OF A CHRISTIAN FRIEND TO THE BRIDEGROOM and the BRIDE A Marriage-Present For the New-Married-Couple Containing Considerations and Advices in order to perswade young Married people to begin the Married life in the fear of the Lord. With Directions and Prayers With plainness intended for the meanest Understanding By one that desires to be a true Son of the Church of Christ as by the Gospel established As being heirs together of the grace of life that your prayers be not hindred 1 Pet. 3.7 Printed in the year 1691. God give you Joy The hearty Wish of a Christian Friend to the Bridegroom and the Bride THE INTRODUCTION IT becomes all that love the Lord Jesus Christ in sincerity to promote the glory of God the Father and according to their capacities to further that great work for which Christ came into the world by labouring to turn every one from their iniquities that they may obtain salvation through faith in him This is that blessing with which God sent his Son to bless the world and which all should endeavour to bring others to be partakers of And therefore should use all means possible to instruct and perswade all to receive and follow that Grace of God which appears in the Gospel and teaches us to deny ungodliness and worldly lusts that we may live soberly and righteously and godly in this present world in every state and condition of life Therefore should we lay hold on every opportunity that may probably be fit for that purpose And I take this as a fit occasion to put you in mind of that duty you are bound to in respect of each other in the married estate that you may glorifie God in helping one anothers Souls that so the prayers and good wishes of your friends may not be in vain but that your Joy may be full true Joy in the Lord. God give you Joy is the usual salutation to new married people and indeed it is what every true Christian friend desires That such may rejoice in the Lord and Joy in the God of Salvation The Love of Christ should constrain us to love others as Christ loved us for the souls good And all that wish well to their Friends and Relations that wish them Joy if they are in earnest and know what they say This is Joy to have the Lords favour that is better than life it self And therefore they should use such means as Gods word teaches to promote that Joy they wish the Joy that God gives But experience shows us that too many are either ignorant or dissemblers in that wish which is turned for the most part into a cold formality and words of course And we also see the ill methods that too many new married folks take to make void such good wishes and oppose their own true joys and real blessings Therefore I put this Paper into your hands as becomes a Christian friend that desires to be a friend to your souls to admonish and intreat you that you make not void the good wishes of your friends by neglecting of God at first nor oppose your own joy by a careless and ungodly life But that you take such care that the beginnings of your mutual love may be seasoned with the Divine love And that your first resolutions on your meeting together in the married state may be so to abide with God and so to live together in his fear that God may live with you here and you with him both here and hereafter However it may have been with you in the single and unmarried state we usually call marriage a changing our condition 'T is my hearty and earnest desire that your change may be for the best and that you may so begin the world together as not to abuse it but in the changed condition you may attend to the Lords service to your souls true comfort and joy In every change of condition we in some sort do begin a new course so that we may justly apply our Saviours precept to all beginnings so to enter on every state of life that in the first place and chiefly we regard the fear of the Lord Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness he joins also a promise to it that outward blessings shall be added Mat. 6.33 Therefore in so great a change as Marriage is it highly concerns you that the married life should be begun in the Lord. Your first and chiefest love should be to him from whom you have your being and on whom you depend for all things both present and to come to whom you should live and who 's glory should be the design of all your actions because his you are and not your own Redeemed to him by the precious blood of his Son Jesus Christ And before that Great Judg you must give up an account of your selves at the last If you have been piously educated then have you need to be careful that the change turn not aside your heart from God But as you have been charged by your Parents Remember to live in the fear of the Lord and abide with God in the married as well as in the single life Remember the Apostles caution 2 Tim 3.14 Change of family and acquaintances and neighbours are great occasions of good or evil as those families relations or kindred acquaintance and neighbours are amongst whom you happen to come If they be ungodly and vain you had need beware they tempt you not to leave off the way of Godly living That which seems pleasant to the flesh is a strong perswasion to bring you to comply with vain worldly ways especially in beginning the married estate they think it strange you will not do as others in worldly vanity and by degrees bring you to think it strange you should not and by degrees to consent to join with them and by unsensible degrees and unperceiv'd methods will they lead you from the good way and you will leave your first love and good practice and fail of the grace of God Therefore you had need beware you change not to the worse Or if there be among them but some ungodly you had need beware you join not with them on worldly accounts rather than with the Godly because poor or on other accounts despised If they are Godly and Religious Friends and Neighbours among whom you come Take heed you do not disgrace your pious education by growing slight and careless after marriage But if your education has not been in the nurture and admonition of the Lord to look after true Godliness then indeed you had need look to it that the condition may be so changed that the married estate may be a state of Godliness Marriage should be in the Lord only in the Lord saith the Apostle 1 Cor. 7.39 'T is this only that makes marriage truly honourable and comfortable And if you have neglected that great thing that one necessary thing till then 't is surely high
to each others soul and to help in the way of salvation is that which becomes Christians and not at all shortens but rather increases and perfects kindness and good nature And this is indeed marrying in the Lord as 1 Cor. 7.39 Therefore receive one another to the glory of God as Christ received us Rom. 15.7 And look on that providence that brings you together as order'd by the Lord. A prudent wife is from the Lord saith Solomon Prov. 19.14 And we may add a prudent husband A religious and good husband or wife is from the Lord his provision or gift of his providing whereas houses and riches lands and inheritances Joyntures and Portions are the gifts of Fathers provisions of men and as such they may decay or be lost but the gifts of the Lord will abide for good and such a gift by Gods grace you may be to each other Resolve then and endeavour at first to put forward and encourage one another to love and good works as such as are come together and appointed by Gods good providence in a particular manner to be helps to build up one another in your most holy faith and to keep one another in the love of God that you may together comfortably expect the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ unto eternal life Jude 20 21. If this be the duty of all Christian friends much more then is it the duty of such as are joined so near in the Covenant of the Lord a Covenant of love and unity so near an union that in the opinion of St. Paul it resembles and may be compared to that love between Christ and his Church as in that similitude before offered to consideration Eph. 5.25 Adv. 2. Secondly I advise That having resolved which I hope you will do put those good resolutions in practice Do not think that it is enough to approve and purpose but set about the work in earnest and that immediately setting your selves at first to live together in Gods way the way of Religion that you may always so continue And let your daily conversation be in the Lord abiding with him according to the rule of the Gospel perswading each other always to do that which is of good report and as becomes the servants of God These things are general but the practice consists in particulars and therefore to those particulars I proceed Adv. 3. In the third place I advise you to pray together daily speak unto God call upon God for his favour and blessings Begin this course as soon as you come together Rising in the morning remember each other of prayers and so with united hearts direct your prayer unto God Psal 5.3 So likewise every evening before you go to bed the seasons God people used Psal 55.16 17. This is the practice of all that are Godly Psal 32.6 so often commanded and commended in the Scripture that I think there needs no more to perswade you that it is your duty Those words of our Saviour Mat. 26.41 watch and pray or those of St. Paul pray without ceasing 1 Thes 5.17 are command enough to all that believe the Scripture to be the word of God These general precepts contain your duty in particular for what God commands all he commands every one and those words of St. Peter 1 Pet. 3.7 that your prayers be not hindred suppose praying to be both the duty and practice of married people And if there had been no command to make prayer your duty yet reason will advise you to it as your interest since God is pleased to give you leave I therefore advise you to pray as one of the best things you can do for one another whether for soul or body Because all that good you or your friends wish or desire for you is from God his gift his blessing without which all your own labour is in vain as is plain from the whole 127th Psalm Except the Lord build the house their labour is but lost that build it It in vain to rise up early to sit up late and to eat the bread of carefulness Whatsoever business you go about whatsoever hopes of comfort in each other you may propose whatsoever designs you may have of thriving in the world together without Gods blessing all will be in vain In vain are all those seeming wishes of Joy from your friends unless the Lord say Amen If you begin not thus and at first ask Gods blessing by prayer how can you expect it Nay you hinder your selves of that good your friends desire for you and you seem to desire for your selves until you seek it at the hand of God by prayer But if you will set your selves at first to seek Gods blessing by praying together there are promises in the Scripture sufficient to encourage you to hope such as these Those that seek me early shall find me Prov. 8.17 Ask and it shall be given you Mat. 7.7 If two of you shall agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask it shall be done for them of my father which is in heaven Mat. 18.19 What should you learn then from these Scriptures but that you agree betimes to pray together and with united hearts to go to God and ask in hope O that I could perswade you to receive this advice and heartily engage you to call upon God that the Lord may be with you and bestow his blessings upon you and yours What can hinder you from this great duty and priviledge I know nothing that can be said against this advice but by way of excuse some will talk of their weakness and not being able But this is for the most part but a trifling pretence which Satan teaches the unwilling in heart to plead For I am fully perswaded that God requires nothing of his creatures but what he knows they are able to perform with his grace in using the means he has afforded and so it will appear in this particular if you consider the helps you have and the nature of the duty as reason and conscience must judg And first in respect of helps If you have not been accustomed to this but are strangers to God in that great and comfortable duty of Prayer you may ask how shall we call upon God that are ignorant and cannot make prayers Tho such thoughts savour of great ignorance yet I will answer in your own way That is you may make use of some form of prayer in some good books of which sort there are many printed among us If you have not a better nor fitter for your condition you may use such as I have added at the end of this book If you say you cannot read neither of you to help the other your case is to be pitied and then I advise you to try to learn I have known several of a willing mind who have learnt to read when grown in years The advantage is great to be able to see at any time the will of
Christian purity Keep us henceforth in holy Spiritual love that we defile not the honourable marriage-bed by desires too sensual but that we may be instruments of each others chastity and purity both in Soul and Body Take from us all dullness of mind and backwardness to Religious duties and both teach and enable us so to order our worldly affairs that our minds and hearts may be alwayes free for thy service and worship Give us we beseech thee the Spirit of wisdom and of a sound mind that with all gravity and soberness we may govern and rule our selves and families in thy faith and fear and love as becomes those that are followers of the holy and blessed Jesus as taught by thy holy word Be pleased to make us both instruments of good to others especially to our kindred and neighbours to the comfort and releef of those that are in want to the instruction of the ignorant to the reproving and reforming the ungodly and to the good of all We pray thee also to make us diligent in our calling not ●lothful in business but as serving the Lord. And so bless our labours and honest endeavours in worldly things that we may have a competency for our selves and ours and to give to those that want And further O heavenly Father we humbly intreat thee to give us both thy Grace that with pure hearts we may fervently love one another and provoke one another to love and good works and watch over each other for the Souls good And deal faithfully with each other not suffering one one another in carlesness of our Souls or in any sin without due serious seasonable and compassionate warning in thy fear And good Lord give each of us such an heart that we may be willing to be warned of our sin and danger and desirous to be reformed And good Lord help us so to live together as abiding in Christ Jesus that which ever of us thou shalt please to call out of this world first may leave the comfort of a well grounded hope to the surviver that both at last shall meet in purer and undefiled love and joy in the inheritance of the promises together with the Spirits made perfect thro' the blood of the holy Jesus in thy heavenly eternal Kingdom For the sake and thro' the mediation of Jesus Christ our only Saviour and Redeemer Amen A prayer to be used in secret by the married man or woman in respect of each other O Most merciful Father and eternal God who hast appointed and sanctified the state of marriage by thy Command and word and by thy good providence hast now joyned me with a partner and companion for the married life Guide me I beseech thee by thy good Spirit that I may do my duty in this state of life to which it hath pleased thee to call me That I may not make the liberty thou givest me an occasion to the flesh nor thro' weakness turn thy permissions to sensuality Pardon I beseech thee all my infirmities and failings in that matter and help me that in all circumstances I may keep a conscience void of offence both towards thee my God and towards men That I may sincerely perform my duty towards thee and with a pure heart be fervently affectionate to my dear yoke-fellow That I may be a good guide and example to my family and in all quietness and sobriety patience and prudence a follower of those who have served thee with godliness and walked in thy Commandments blameless And guide I beseech thee my dear yoke-fellow and endue him or her with thy Grace and blessing both in Soul and Body O keep him or her I beseech thee from all temptations and all inclinations to evil Give him or her an heart to hear and obey thy holy word and keep him or her from all sickness and bodily dangers And so keep us both in thy fear and holy love to each other that we may receive good and religious counsel of each other and truly follow the same and watch for each others Souls good So that at the end of a chast and holy conversation in the Lord we may together enjoy the promised felicity of thy chosen in thy everlasting Kingdom thro' our dear and only Redeemer the Lord Jesus Christ Amen A prayer to be used by the woman when conceived with child O Merciful God and heavenly Father who hast made all things and preservest all things and hast appointed marriage as the way of continuing the generation of mankind I desire to be thankful that thou hast called me to the holy state of marriage and in that state hast given me the blessing of the marriage bed even strength to conceive with Child The fruit of the Womb is a blessing from thee O God alone which all the treasures on earth cannot purchase And now O Lord I beseech thee continue thy blessing giving me strength both to bear and bring forth let the sickness and illness attending conception bring me more seriously to consider of the sin of our first parents how the woman was in the transgression and thereby my sorrows multiplied that I may be truly humbled for my natural corruption which Lord in thy mercy pardon and cleanse me from thro' the blood of Jesus Christ and give me comfort in that gracious promise of the Seed of the Woman that should break the Serpents head Lord I humbly beg that the expectation of pains and sorrow in travel and bringing forth may bring me to more serious thoughts of my Soul and my duty and may quicken me to repentance and stir up my heart to lay faster hold on Christ Jesus by a lively faith that all my sins may be forgiven and that I may be more watchful to all Christian duties of my place and that I may wait with patience the appointed time and be prepared for life or death as thou shalt be pleased to appoint And that I may be saved in childbearing Lord strengthen me with thy grace and keep me by thy power that I may continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety And when the time appointed for delivery shall come help me patiently to bear the pangs and thro's and sorrows And let them be sactified to the humbling of my Soul and bring me thro' all I beseech thee by thy power and goodness And give me a living child with all its parts limbs and sences in due order And grant me in due time a safe recovery of former strength that I may no more remember the anguish for joy that a man is born into the world to become a member of Christs Church that I may be glad in the Lord who is pleased to make me a chanel of blessings to my husband and family Or if thou seest fit to finish my life by this danger in child bearing be pleased to receive me to life eternal in thy heavenly Kingdom But if it be thy blessed will I desire humbly to live