thy deserts O Lord I confesse vnto thee that my harte is vncleane and that I am a man of polluted lippes wallowing in the dunge and stinkinge in the rottennesse of my owne sinne soe that I may iustlye tremble to appeare before thy glorious presence much more to present vnto thee thy pure prayses out of my defiled mouth But who except thou O Lorde can make mee cleane and what is pure which thou hast not purged Thee therefore O Father of life O Lord of light thee with all the forces of my soule thee most humbly most earnestly I do beseech heare O mercifull helpe O myghtye Lord helpe thy seruant whome of thy mercie thou hast created clense my filthynes lighten my darknes enflame my coldenes quicken my dulnes awake my drowsines reuiue my deadnes repaire the ruines of my soule enlarge the frame of the vnderstanding thereof clense it from all earthly corruption garnish it with thy heauenly graces that it may bee conueniently both fitt and furnished to receiue thee that thou maist make thine entrie possesse that which is thine owne both by creation also by redemption and that as thou art exalted aboue all creatures soe aboue all creatures I may honour thee loue thee and praise thee not with that affection wherewith my weakenesse is able either to doe or to desier but with that perfection wherewith in dutie I should and wherewith thy Saintes and angells indeede doe O giuer of life O restorer O preseruer O enlightner of life O most louinge and louely Lorde But what shall I say where shall I finde full praises to extoll thee my speach faltreth and my spirit faileth my tongue can applie no fitting wordes neither can my minde supplye sufficient matter I want wordes to expresse my minde I want alsoe a minde to apprehende thy merites I conceiue farre aboue the abilitie of my vtterance and yet farre vnder the dignitie of thy desertes Lord my soule is desirous to yeelde praises to thee for thy benefites but it is vnable to conceiue that which is worthy and vnwilling to vtter that which is vnworthy it is ashamed to sende forth woordes knowinge how weake they are for soe weightie an office without thy presence it can neuer attaine to any degree of thy praise let it therefore haue thee O Lorde that it may in some measure praise thee For what worthy praise can I giue vnto thee by whose goodnes I was created by whole mercie I was redeemed by whose power I am preserued and by whose grace I looke to bee glorified when I was not thou diddest make mee when I was lost and forlorne thou camest downe and tookest mortallitie vpon thee to redeeme mee thou a King diddest humble thy selfe to exalt mee thou wert sould to redeem mee thou wert wounded to heale mee and thou diddest dye to saue mee O sonne of God how hast thou abased thy selfe how were thy affections inflamed how large were the limits of thy mercie Lorde thou hast loued mee more then thy selfe beecause for my sake thou wouldest endure not onely a contemptible life but both a shamefull and painfull death And yet did not thy loue in this sorte leaue mee but thou hast continuallye soe followed mee with thy fauours as though thou haddest regarded mee alone and neglected all thy other creatures When I wandred thou diddest seeke mee when I was ignorant thou diddest instruct mee when I offended thou diddest correct mee when I sorrowed thou diddest comforte mee when I stumbled thou diddest stay mee when I fell thou diddest raise mee when I stoode thou diddest strengthen mee in my affaires thou diddest direct mee in my troubles thou diddest helpe mee in my dangers thou diddest deliuer mee waking thou diddest inlighten mee sleeping thou diddest watch mee sinninge thou diddest suffer mee and prayinge thou diddest heare mee Further thou hast annointed mee with thy holy spirit and giuen mee a minde to follow thee thou hast called mee by thine owne name and thou hast sealed mee with thy bloude vnto eternall life These and manye other benefites haue I receiued some in hand and some in hope although through my owne sinnefull demeanor I haue almost both let go my hold and lost my hope But what if by my owne fault I haue lost these graces shall I bee vnthankefull to him by whose fauoure once I had them Lorde I can yealde noe reason wherefore I had them but that thou wert mercifull ney can I say any thinge nowe I haue soe neere lost them but that thou art iust therefore I thanke thee beecause thou diddest giue mee them I am sorie beecause I haue noe better kept them and I pray thee that thou wouldest againe fully restore them For I assure my selfe that thy goodnes is as willinge to restore as it was to giue and that my weakensse is as able to recouer as it was to receiue Therefore O Lorde Iesus by thy precious teares by thy blessed bloude which thou diddest shedd for my redemption by the aboundance of thy mercies I most humbly beeseech thee saue thy seruant saue one of thy members though poore and feeble saue I saye a part of thy selfe Be as greate in pardoning those that are submitted vnto thee as in punishing those that are rebellious poure vpon my heart the sweete streames of thy mercies conforme my life confirme my faith settle mee in a right and vpright course and contynue mee in the same euen vnto the end The worlde O Lorde is wrapped in darkenesse whereby it is made subiect both to the pollicies and power of our most dangerous and deadly enemy who beeing the prince of darkenes is thereby become alsoe the prince of the worlde but by thy light his malice is discouered by thy wisdome his deceites are auoided and by thy strength his power is repelled Hee hath manye and verye greate thinges I confesse to laye vnto my charge but for thy names sake O Lorde rebuke him and deliuer me Drawe my desires aboue the pitch of his darkenesse raise my soule out of this myrie lake of misery which affoordeth nothing but eyther daungers or discontentmentes that this filthy lumpe of flesh onely may abide on earth but my thoughtes may continually attend vpon thee O sweete Iesus the way of health the gate of life the pallace of pietie of ioy of safetie I doe too much depresse thy benefites whilest I labour to expresse them for they haue not onely filled but ouerflowed the frame of the worlde But O thou who vnfealest the silence of the dumbe vntie my tongue that I may declare thy goodnes and giue my voice a power to praise thee for the same By thee O Lord the exile is reduced the captiue redemed the sinner is iustified the sicke are healed the dead are raised and the damned are saued By thy goodnesse wee are created by thy power wee are preserued by thy mercye wee are saued Thou diddest create vs without any neede thou doest gouerne vs without any labour thou mayest
his desires vanitie is not his life miserie and a verye shadowe of death wilt thou shewe thy strength against a worme against a leafe against a blast O thou who grantest truce of life there are but twoe pleas before thy throne either of innocencie or els of mercie I doe cleerely debarre my selues of the one oh let my soule runne into the armes of the other Haue mercie vpon mee O gracious God haue mercy vpon mee a most wretched creature deale not with mee according to my desertes but according to the greatnesse of thy mercie which is infinitely more then the sinnes of the whole world O almighty God from whose sight there is noe couert and against whose power ther is neither resistance nor flight looke not vppon mee with thy eie of iustice drawe not thy sworde of vengence against mee but extend that compassion which thou hast soe graciously soe deerelye purchased for mee I acknowledge indeede that amonge all and aboue all sinners I am wretched I acknowledge also that I am vnable to satisfie for my sinnes but O sonne of God beehold that in thy selfe which may moue thee to haue compassion vppon mee Soe often as thou beehouldest the woundes of thy bruised bodie soe often let pittie pierce thy harte Soe often as thou behouldest the blessed streames of thy bloode wherof one droppe had bin sufficient for redemption of the whole worlde soe often couer my sinnes and recouer mee Forgiue my ignorance forget my presumption pardone my iniquities relieue my necessities let my sinnes no longer bee a cloude betweene my prayer and thy pittie beetweene thy goodnesse and my distresse most gracious God who art mercifull towardes all suffer not mee to bee distitute of thy mercie for although I haue committed that whereby I maye bee damned yet hast thou neither forgone nor forgotten that wherby thou art wout to saue O wretch that I am how coldly doe I crie how weakly doe I craue woe is me wretch how is my harte hardened that mine eies doe not poure forth plentie of teares how sencelesse is my vncleane soule that my flesh tremble not that my iointes doe not shake vntill my knees knocke together But wherefore do I expostulate with a dead carcase Alasse I am nothinge but vanitie a rotten roote without anye life of vertue a barren grounde bringing forth nothinge but sinne shame and damnation I am vnable either to giue thee any thing but of thine owne goodes or to doe any thinge for my selfe but by thy free guifte Wherefore O sweete sauiour by thy tender loue and by all thy mercies I beeseech thee giue mee grace that with thy goodes and by thy guiftes I may serue thee and sorrowe for my sinnes giue mee alsoe a floude of teares in token of thy fauour that I may sweetlye poure them beefore thy presence with greate reuerence and feare in bewailinge mine offences Mollifie my stonie harte illuminate my mistie minde subdue my flesh to my soule my soule vnto reason my reason to faith let mee ioie only in enioyinge thee in whome desire neuer wanteth sacietie and sacietie neuer breede dislike Come thou into mee that I may remaine in thee shake off these shackles free me from this weight of fleshly affections that leauing and loathing all earthlye desires I may firmelye resolue speedely beginne and constantlye continue in dooinge and sufferinge thy holy will Poure vpoÌ„ my hart the sweete stremes of thy grace that therby my affectioÌ„s may be framed to honour thee as a Creator to loue thee as a redeemer to expect thee as a Sauiour to feare as a iudge Let mee allwaies bee humbled beefore thee and neuer bee high minded but onelye in mindinge thinges on high Write thy name with thy owne finger within the tables of my breast neuer to be either shadowed or worne out that I may continually feede my hungry hoâ—es with stedfast remembrance and regard of thee for firmly to remember reuerently to regard thee is our mortall manner both of holdinge and beeholding thee Let the firie force of thy loue swallow vp my soule that being altogether possessed therwith it may neither feele nor desire nor once thinke vpoÌ„ any erthly thing but bee alwaies and onely not onelye ioined but vnited to thee for as thy goodnesse towardes vs is vnmeasurable and infinite soe wee are bound to loue thee without either measure or end Lorde my whole desire is before thee and my thoughtes are not secret from thy sight turne not thy countenance from my complaint heare mee O my God and grant my petion grant my petion that thou mayst heare mee Reach mee thy helping hande draw my soule out of the mire of sinne wherin it is fast set that I perish not in the presence of thy pittie Deliuer mee froÌ„ the snares that th' enemy hath laid to take the souls of sinners ether willfull or secure cutt away occsions of euell beefore mee guide mee vnto thee the streightest course and soe long as I am to continue in this vile vale of miserie settle mee in that state of life wherein I may best please thee and pleasure others Giue mee grace O gracious God that although I haue hetherto had noe care to liue well yet nowe I may wholly and holyly bend my care to die well that from henceforth I may liue in thy feare die in thy fauour rest in thy peace rise in thy power and remaine in thy ioie Amen Nec pudet viuere nec piget mori Call vpon mee in the day of tribulation I will deliuer thee and thou shalt praise mee Psal. 50. The IIII. Deuotion A Thankesgiuing intermixt with confession and prayer O Lorde Iesus infinite in pitie infinite in power infiite allsoe both in thy rewards and in thy reuenge I am weakly thou knowest rather willing then desirous with my soule to loue thee with my flesh to feare thee with my minde to honor thee with my mouth to praise thee with my whole substance to serue thee to commend my whole substance vnto thy protection But alas I am soe clogged with corruption I am soe drowned in flesh and bloud that I scarce either dare or can lifâ— vp my head and looke vnto thee and yet why should I bee ashamed when thou doest inuite mee why should I bee faint when thou doest not onely incourage but alsoe enable mee or at the least accept my weake endeuour Striue then O the verie bowels of my soule striue with all your strength to raise your thoughtes out of this mire of mortallitie wherein they sticke out of these waues of fleshly affections wherein they floate without either firme footinge or certaine drift Aduance thy selfe towardes thy creator Frame thy affections to loue him for his goodnes to honour him for greatnes to reioice in him for his merites to pray vnto him for his mercies which daylye thou doest neede and by needing doest craue and by crauing doest obtaine if not according to thy desires yet verye farre aboue
that thou shalt not die yet assure thy selfe this heauie houre this fearfull this dangerous this vnauoidable passage is not farre from thee euen in the fardest and fairest course of nature and may bee euerye houre by many vsuall accidentes both of violence and of sicknesse Thy continuance is onely certaine in vncertaintie and God would haue the time vnknowne because thou shouldest bee allwayes readie Awake therfore and watch ouer thy selfe looke vpon the pale horse and him that sitteth thereon whose name is Death prouide that thou be not sodainely surprised and die before thou beginne to liue Loose not the offer of occasion whilest it may not onely bee taken but offereth yea sueth to bee taken and if it be not now taken will neuer heereafter be ouertaken Christ yet distributeth the treasures of hys mercye the doore standeth yet open to all that will bee suiters for the same his nature is nowe as apte to forgeue as hys power will be able hereafter to punish The kings of Israell were not so famous for heir mercy among the seruauntes of Abinadab as the God is among vs. When thou didst sinne hee did spare when thou didst deferre he did expect when thou shalt returne he will eÌ„brace The bowelles of his mercie doe still ouerflowe neyther wante their issues to deriue the streames thereof into thy soule his backe was torne hys handes and feete were pierced hys side was opened throughe these holes thou maist see the aboundaunce of his loue at these holy holes thou maist taste the sweetenesse of hys mercy Present thy selfe therefore vnto him in all those humble behauiours which the consideration of his maiestie and thy miserie can possibly frame be penitent for the time past and resolue for the time to come and with as greate confidence as necessitie crye vnto him and say O Christ O eternall light O life of all thinges to whom nothing is soe greate that it can resist nothinge soe small that it is contemptible whom no man is soe good that he doth not neede noe man soe euell that he may not hope I beseech thee by the noblâ—st title that in my greatest affliction I can geue my selfe that I am thy creature and by thy onely name of comfort vnto sinners that thou art mercifull heare my vile voyce helpe my distressed soule and in the time of necessitie and trouble bee graâ—ious vnto me Behold O Lord howe my conscience lyeth queasomed vnder the multitude of my offences behold how I am borne downe wyth the weight of my owne weakenesse and doe not thou whose propertie is not onely to spare but to helpe eyther lighten the burthen or lay vnder thy heauenlye hand my soule must needes sincke downe into hell But thou O Lord hast neither delight nor likinge in the death of sinners thou didst dy to raise vs vp from the death of sin O good Iesu thou diddest redeeme vs when wee were thine enemies and shall wee bee destroied now wee are thy suppliantes thou diddest call vs to mercie when wee craued none and wilt thou denye vs now we are suiters for it through thy death wee were brought vnto life and shall we dy now thou doest lâ—ue O thou whoe helpest the weake wich a worde behoulde I come I call I looke for thy mercie hide not thy face stoppe not thine eare cast mee not out of thy regarde let it suffice that I feel mine own weaknesse and want least I should haue beene too proud in my selfe now let thy power and plentye appeare that thereby I may bee confident in thee O Christ the guide of those that seeke thee the light of those that see thee and the life of those that loue thee O sweete Sauiour what shall I say whether shall I goe where shall I seeke thee or wherefore doe I not see thee O my God if thou bee absent from mee where shall I seeeke thee if in all places thou art present wherefore doe I not see thee O infinite goodnesse passing all humane both search and sight thou both fillest and includest all thinges thou art in euerie place present without either seate or motion giue mee grace for thy loue and desires sake I beeseech thee to cast off the blinde burthen of fleshlye affections subdue my reason regenerate my will and purifie my nature lead my desire that I may seeke thee lighten my vnderstandinge that I may see thee for I can neither seeke thee without thou direct mee nor see thee except thou reueale thy selfe Gracious God I haue noe goodnesse in my selfe but onely to finde that I haue no goodnesse like a scholler who is come to that degree of knowledge to knowe him selfe vtterly ignorante but suffer I beseech thee some beutifull beame of thy maiestie to shine into my soule disperse the cloudes wherwith my conscience is ouercast melt the mistie darknesse which couereth my vnderstanding O thou who saydest let there be light and light was made speake the worde and my soule shall bee enlightened that I may playnly see thee and perfectly knowe thee and ardently both desire and loue thee O surpassinge light deliuer mee from the shadow both of ignorance and errour and consequently from the darkenesse of death swallow me vp in the depth of thy brightnesse dazell my eyes that I maye not bee able to see any thing but thee possesse all my bodily sences that my sinnefull affections or rather defections may finde no place but that I maye soe feele thee that I haue noe feelinge of my selfe O Lord of life allthough I am a sinner yet I am thy creature beecause thou hast made mee yea and made me againe both by redeeming and by often renuing mee helpe mee therefore whome of thy goodnesse thou hast fashioned let mee not perish in my miserie whom of thy mercie thou hast redeemed gouerne mee heerafter whome hetherto thou hast preserued despise not O Lord the worke of thine owne handes For wherfore hast thou created mee beecause thou wouldest damne mee It had bin better for mee neuer to haue bin made then to bee confounded in my owne corruption Listen O Lord to the crie of thy poore Orphane cast mee not off in thy displeasure and my distresse forsake mee not for thy sake I beeseech thee And although I haue in such sorte both defiled and defaced this thy creature that thou mayest iustly refuse to take knowledge of mee yet by thy mercies I pray thee wherein thou art more wonderfull then in all thy workes remoue the one and renue the other rubbe out with thy bloode the staines which sticke in my soule and then thou wilt knowe it to bee thy creature O Lord my God at whose presence all powers doe shake at whose becke all creatures obey looke fauourably vpon me from thy glorious seate let thy maiestie shine vnto mee through thy mercie bee not angrye with vs wormish weak elinges although we offend for thou knowest what wee are and whereof we are made Is not man rottennesse are not