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B22568 The pope shut out of heaven gates, or, A dialogue between Pope Julius the 2d, his Genius, and Saint Peter wherein is most elegantly, learnedly, and wittily set forth how Pope Julius (after death) imperiously knocking at heaven gates, is absolutely denied entrance by Saint Peter, so that though having been alwayes stil'd His Holiness, and made famous by his warlike actions, whereby he hoped to become Lord of heaven, he is notwithstanding delivered over as a slave to Satan, and hurried away to the Devil's mansion / exactly from the original of the famous and learned Erasmus Roterodamus. Erasmus, Desiderius, d. 1536. 1673 (1673) Wing E3208B 31,750 50

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THE POPE Shut out of Heaven Gates OR A DIALOGUE BETWEEN Pope Julius the 2 d. His Genius and Saint Peter Wherein is most elegantly learnedly and wittily set forth how Pope Julius after death imperiously knocking at Heaven Gates is absolutely denied Entrance by Saint Peter so that though having been alwayes stil'd His Holiness and made famous by his Warlike Actions whereby he hoped to become Lord of Heaven he is notwithstanding delivered over as a Slave to Satan and hurried away to the Devil's Mansion Exactly from the Original of the Famous and Learned Erasmus Roterodamus Lector Risum cohibe London Printed for Roger Vaughan in Bishop's Court in the Old-Baily and are to be sold by the Book-sellers 1673. The Speakers Julius II. Genius St. Peter Pope Julius II. WHat 's here to do with a mischief won't these Gates of Heaven open Sure either the Wards are changed or the Lock out of Order Genius You had best look whether you have brought the right Key for the same do's not open these Gates that opens your Money-chest why did not you therefore bring both for that indeed is the Key of Power but not of Knowledge Jul. I never had any other then this and cannot imagine what occasion there should be of any other while this is here Gen. Nor I neither but that in the mean time we shall be shut out Jul. I grow monstrous angry I 'le knock down these Doors Ho within there some one open this Gate quickly or what 's to do here do's no body come yet where 's this lazy Porter sure he 's dead drunk and snoring Gen. How he measures every one by himself St. Peter 'T is well these are Adamantine Gates else whoever this is would have broke them down sure this must be some mighty Giant or Potent Lord the subverter of Cities But Foh what common Sewer or Jakes is this I smell I won't presently open the Gate but out of the Wicket see if I can discover the wonder What art thou or what wouldst have here Jul. Open you the Gate Sir as soon as you can had you done your Duty you ought to have come and met me with all the Train of Heaven St. Peter Bravely Imperious But pray let me first know who you are Jul. As though you did not see St. Peter See! I see indeed a new and unusual sight I will not say a Monster Jul. But if you been't stark blind you will I suppose know this Key if you don't know the Golden Oak and you may see my Triple Crown and my Robes every where shining with Gold and precious Stones St. Peter That Silver Key indeed I in a sort do know though it be alone and much unlike those which of old the true Pastor of the Church Christ delivered to me but that Exalted Crown how should I possibly have any knowledge of which no barbarous Tyrant ever durst wear nor indeed any one that ever desired entrance here As for those Robes they move not me at all and that Gold and Jewels I shall ever contemn and trample on as dung But what 's the matter I spy every-where upon thy Key thy Crown and thy Robe marks of a most horrid Vilain and Impostor bearing indeed my Title but not at all of my Institution rather of Simon the Sorcerers whom by Christ's assistance I o'rethrew Jul. Leave this trifling if you 're wise for whether you know it or no I am Julius that Ligurian and you will own or I am deceived two letters P. M. unless you never learned any St. Peter I suppose they signifie Pestilent Mischief Gen. Ha ha ha how right has he hit it Jul. No Sir they signifie Pontifex Maximus or Mighty Pope St. Peter Be as Mighty as you will and reckon your self among the Mightiest nay Mightier then Hermes Trismegistus you shall not be received here unless you were likewise good that is Holy Jul. Why if it be any thing to the purpose to be called Holy thou art too impudent thus to delay opening the Gates to me Thou who for so many Ages hast only been called Saint when none ever stil'd me other then the Most Holy There are extant six thousand Bulls Gen. Ay Bulls indeed Jul. In which I am more then once called the Most Holy Lord and alwayes intituled His Holiness not bare Saint so that whatever I had a mind to do Gen. Though it were in your drink that they would say was done by His Holiness The most Holy Lord Julius St. Peter You may e'ne go and ask Heaven too from those flatterers who will be very likely to give you such a kind of Happiness as they did Holiness However you must know it is nothing to be called Holy Are you so Jul. I am enraged Had I but leave to live again I would neither envie you your Holiness nor your Happiness St. Peter Words well becoming an Holy Mind but indeed looking seriously on you I can discover many marks of Impiety but not one of Sanctity For what makes that new Attendance which looks not very Priestly Thou bringest here neer twenty thousand along with thee and yet in the whole croud I see not one has so much as the countenance of a Christian I see a filthy dunghil of men smelling of nothing but Brothels Drink and Gunpowder they look like Thieves hired to vilany or rather like Hellish Goblins broke from the Deeps to wage War against Heaven And the more I view thee the less can I discern any footsteps of an Apostolical Person For to begin how monstrous is it to see thee outwardly clad in Priestly Robes and inwardly groaning under horrid Arms Then what murderous eyes what a stubborn look what a threatning forehead and what a lofty and arrogant countenance for I am ashamed to say it and grieve to see it There is no one part of thy body but is defiled with the marks of prodigious and abominable Lust not to add thy continual Belching thy smelling of Surfet and Drunkenness so that at this moment thou lookst as though thou wert Vomiting for by the habit of thy body 't is perceivable thou art not so much broken with Age or Diseases as with Excess of Gluttony and Drunkenness Gen. How he sets him out in his true colours St. Peter I see thee now darting a threatning look at me yet I cannot forbear telling thee what I think I suspect the pestilent Heathen Julian to be personally returned from Hell to defie me so alike you are in all things Jul. Ma di si St. Peter What 's that he mutters Gen. He 's angry At those words not one of the Cardinals durst forbear flying unless he would feel His Holiness's Club about his ears especially at a banquet St. Peter Thou seem'st to understand the man very well tell me therefore who thou art Gen. I am the great Julius's Genius St. Pet. His evil one I believe Gen. Whatever I am Julius's I am Jul. Pray Sir leave you off this
then Morychus more unlearned and blockish then a Stock and more deformed and filthy then a Toad Whoever holds once this Key of Power ought to be reverenced as Christ's Vicar and reputed as Most Holy St. Pet. What! though he be openly wicked Jul. Ay never so openly for it is not to be endured that he who acts here in God's stead and should be esteemed as a God among Men should be subject to the reproofs of every idle fellow or exposed to every ones reproaches St. Pet. But it is opposite to common sense to think well of that which we apparently behold to be evil or to speak well of that which we think to be wicked Jul. Let every one think what they please but let them take care to speak well or else hold their tongues for the Pope of Rome is not to be reproved no not by a General Council St. Pet. One thing I know that whoever pretends to supply Christ's place upon Earth ought to be as like him as he can and so lead his life that it be unblameable and that none can justly speak ill of him but surely those Popes are but in an evil case who must be beholding to threatnings rather then good actions for mens good words and whose greatest glory is that they can compel men who think evil of them to silence But answer me one thing Is a wicked and pestilent Pope no way to be removed Jul. Ridiculous By whom should he be removed who is the highest St. Pet. For that reason he ought the rather to be removed because the highest for the higher he is if he be evil the more pernicious he is but you Julius make a much more happy High Priest then Christ ever constituted who whilst he thinks himself highest quite forgets that he is a Priest And though really the worst of mankind thinks he may lawfully and unpunish't be the worst because by title the greatest A Priest so much the highest by his title that he claims and challenges the highest and supreamest right not without the ghest injury over Kings who are truly supream and Emperours who are the highest under God and as if they were sollicited and intreated to Reign by virtue of a forged and pretended Vicarship to Christ usurping a right first to prohibit sacred and then temporal things a right of dispensing their Subjects from that Faith and Obedience due to them by God's own Command In fine a right of waging War against them for any light occasion perhaps a wicked one and pursuing it after a Fontificial manner not to a Spiritual amendment of life but to the taking away Temporal power And in the mean time you grant this Pope by virtue of his highest place or as you would rather perhaps have it expressed his Seat unmoveable by any mortal power no not by the greatest Kings or Emperours a Power of violating all Rights not only Humane but Divine and making a mixture as one may say of Heavenly and Earthly wickedness Happy Julius was it for the World that Death at length had this right over thee and I believe thou blamest it too for acting too tyrannically which thou so stiffly deniest to all other mortals But was it thus ordained by Christ or is the Church's advantage so to be provided for that its life and safety must be reposed in the death of such an High Priest Jul. But if the Pope of Rome be to be Reformed it must be done by a Council now no Council can be called without the Pope's consent otherwise 't is a Cabal and no Council Or when it is called it can decree nothing which the Pope opposes for in him is the chief Presidency and absolute Power so that the Pope alone is much Superiour to any General Council and from his Office he cannot be removed for any crime whatsoever St. Pet. Not for Murder Jul. Not for Parricide St. Pet. Not for Fornication Jul. That 's a toy I tell you not for Incest St. Pet. Not for Simonaical Impiety Jul. Not for six hundred St. Pet. Not for Witchcraft Jul. No nor for Sacriledge St. Pet. Not for Blasphemy Jul. No I say St. Pet. Not for all these together drawn up into one mass of mischiefs Jul. Add if you will to these the Names of six hundred crimes yet more filthy then those yet could not a Pope for all those be removed from the Papacy St. Pet. Indeed Julius you seem to have a very honourable opinion of General Councils as above Kings and Emperours but you only seem to have so for you do not unwillingly approve that Councils of old were as Colledges of Physicians to whose care the Cure of the Church when indisposed was to be committed But at this day they are rarely called to that end or you indeed can scarce be brought to endure they should be but the Head for so you love to call it though it be not in very good health nay though that Head be so infected that it may deservedly be accounted the common disease and plague of the Church yet that polluted Head though deserving to be cut off or removed is not at all in your judgment to be submitted to the censure of an Occumenical Council which are as it were Representatives of the Church Jul. Yet there is one thing for which some are of opinion he may be removed St. Pet. For what good act must that be For a crime it cannot be since it cannot be for those I have before named Jul. For the crime of Heresie so he be publickly convicted of it but that 's frivolous too nor do's not a tittle derogate from the Papal Majesty for in the first place he may abrogate that Law if it displease him then again who dares impeach the Pope of Rome encompassed with so many Guards besides if he be prest hard to call a Council the Recantation is easie if he cannot deny summoning them And lastly there are a thousand starting-holes for him to slip out of if he be a Man and not a Block St. Pet. But tell me by thy Pontifical Power who Established these Excellent Laws Jul. Who should but the Fountain of all Laws the Pope of Rome and it belongs to him to repeal interpret explain streighten or enlarge any Law as shall be most for his advantage St. Pet. Happy were the Pope could he make a Law to deceive Christ and Heaven as well as he can a Council But indeed against such a Pope as thou hast now described such an open wicked Wretch such a Drunkard Murderer Simoniac Sorcerer P●rju●er Ravenous and prodigious Villain everywhere stained over and defiled with all kinds of Lust not so much a General Council were to be wished as a furious People arm'd with stones that so publick a plague of the World might as publickly be taken out of it But tell me what 's the reason why the Popes of Rome so much abhor General Councils Jul. Because such a company of Excellent Men do not