You may well be astonished at what I have told you replies Sosia but it is a manifest truth Sum profecto hic illic I am both here and there Nothing I confess is more Theatral than these ways of speaking but it must be granted also that nothing better explains the nature of this strict union that Marriage makes There are no words that can exactly represent it One ought for that end to compose a new Grammar One cannot speak of it but in making Solecisms and in confounding the plural with the singular and the singular with the plural They are no more two but one flesh says God himself of Man and Woman They are one in two persons They are but one person in two bodies Animae duae two Souls Animus unus one mind Idem Velle idem nolle and one will There happens nothing to one but what arrives to t'other The Husband and the Wife feel the same things They suffer the same evils They enjoy the same good things Grief and joy make the same impressions in each of them Morbo detinetur unus Detinentur duo Adversa premunt unum Sensus in utroque est utrumque risus utrumque lachrymae Prospera laetaque tenent unum tenent utrumque As the Phylopher so well expresses in Seneca The same distempers and misfortunes reach both If one laugh so doth the other their tears are the same c. This is too strong for a simple friendship Such a one as this never appeared Or if such a one has been found one must necessarily suppose it to be more than a union of Spirits You know that another was practised frequently enough amongst the Pagans which might much contribute to the making of such friends but which is so scandalous to nature that you must be contented to read it in the first Chapter of St. Paul to the Romans without hearing it named But Sir if you would be perfectly convinced that there is nothing in nature more excellent than Marriage you are only to look upon it with relation to the great mysteries it represents The holy Spirit has made use of in a thousand places in our Divine Scriptures to testifie to us the tenderness of the Father under the Law and of the charity of the Son under the Gospel I will espouse thee to me for ever Hosea 2. I will espouse thee to me in justice in judgment in mercy and in compassion I will espouse thee with constancy and thou shalt call me thy Husband said God himself to his ancient Israel I have appropriated you 2. Cor. 11. Eph. 5.23.32 said also St. Paul to the new People to one single Husband to present you as a chast Virgin to Jesus Christ Besides the Church is called the Body of Christ and the Spouse of the Lamb the Song of Songs is nothing else but the Epithalamium of this Divine Marriage Thus God was Married with the Jewish Church Jesus Christ is also Married with the Christian Church 'T is thus the Sacred Authors represent to us that intimate union of the Faithful with the Divinity and Flesh of Christ 'T is thus they insinuate to us that profoundness of love we find in his heart 'T is thus they instruâ—â— us how dear we are to him and it as we ought to make our interests of his so he never fails to make ours his own The ancient Doctors have carried yet further the perfection of Marriage when they considered it as the natural Image of the Hypostatick union of the two Natures in Christ One must acknowledge in effect that nothing discovers to us better the bottom of this adorable mystery As we have seen of one Man and one Woman Marriage makes but one and the same person they are no more two but one flesh From thence proceeds this reasoning of St. Paul that he who loves his Wife loves himself The Son of God being also united to our Flesh is become the Son of Man He doth not think it a point of usurpation to make himself equal to God and notwithstanding in uniting himself to us by the Incarnation he is become flesh of our flesh and bone of our bone By the incomprehensible force of this union he has ceased to be simply God neither is 〈◊〉 become simply Man He has reunâ—â—ed 〈◊〉 one and the same person those two opposite Natures which make him to be our Emanuel God with us He is not only Man he is Man-God He is not only God he is God-Man but as in Marriage the union which is made as intimate as it is yet destroys not the substance of the two parties which compose it each preserving its own with its essential qualities So the Hypostatick union of the two Natures in Christ confounds them not The one is not absolv'd by the other The both subsist in him after a distinct and inexpressible manner without any alteration of their essential qualities Do not imagine with the Nestorians two persons there is but one Do not fancy to your self with the Eutichians a single Nature there are two In a word the Ancients affirm of Marriage that it is the Symbol of the union of regenerate Souls with God They are all in him and he in all them As he who joyns himself to a Wife becomes one and the same body with her So says St. Paul Cor. 6.16 17. John 17.21 He who is joyned to the Lord is made one and the same Spirit with him It is by the efficacy of this mystical union that Jesus Christ said of the whole body of his elect Gal. 2.20 That they are but one with him and with his Father That his Apostle says He lives no more but that it is Jesus Christ who lives in him And that the holy Spouse says That her well-beloved appertains to her Cant. 2.16 and she to her well-beloved It is the divine Love that is the efficient cause of this mystical union 'T is that which produces in us this holy metamorphosis 'T is that which transforms us into God himself Solus amor est quo convirtimur ad Deum transformamur in Deum ad hearemus Deo ut simus unus Spiritus cum eo Said a learned man T is love alone by which we are turn'd to God transform'd into God we stick to God that we may be one Spirit with him O Love that always burns and is never extinguished Inflame me all over with thy fire to the end that being consumed by the sweet fâ—â—â—es of thy affection I may be never â—â—â—ble of any other love said also the same holy Soul How much I beseech you ought one to determine in all these prospects for the perfection and excellency of Marriage All other Societies are transitory unfertile made up of nothing or of a pure temporal interest This of Marriage is only eternal Death it self that puts an end to all doth not always conclude this because it doth not only unite the Bodies It unites also
lead the way to vice What advantage doth it bring to them unless it be to expose them to great temptations unless it be to deprive them of a very commodious assistant such as a Wife is unless it be to renounce the sweetest of Societies And this for I know not what difficulties they frame to themselves whereof one part is purely imaginary another is tyed to all the conditions of life and the rest is nothing in comparison of the real pleasures of Marriage What advantages likewise return from thence to the Republick People are oftener scandalised than improved thereby and very often are seen examples of them which more deserve our horrour than our imitation I speak of worldly Batchelors and of such as are withdrawn from the world and consecrated to the Almighty The most favourable judgment that one can make of the wisest Celebacy is that it is a virtue which doth neither good nor evil Now for this reason that it is without action one may say that it is a kind of vice for according to Cicero Virtutis laus omnis in actione consist it From whence comes this of Silius the Italian Actio si desit virtus est futile nomen Virtue 's a useless Name without practice Celibacy then has nothing but the name of Virtue It has neither the effect nor the truth of it It is a simple quality which is very often founded upon the temper and constitution of bodies or which is of less importance upon the maxims of a carnal prudence After all man was made for Society Non solum nobis nati sumus Cic. L. 2. We are not born for our selves only It is not good that man should be alone says God himself Est opus auxilio says Ovid. we have need of help Tristis cris si solus eris You 'l be sorrowful if your alone The testimony of a single person is of no account amongst Lawyers Vox unius vox nullius And as the Father of Philosophers says two are better than one both for council and action Duo simul viventes intelligere agere sunt potentiores quam unus Arist L. 8. Eth. The Divinity it self which is but one in essence is notwithstanding more than one in person And why has God created two Sexes in Nature if it was not to make us understand that one is necessary to the other and that they cannot subsist without being joyned together Are not all living creatures bent that way by a natural inclination Is it not this mutual love of males for females and females for males thet multiplies their Species and preserves the world Nec caeant pecudes si levis absit amor Ovid. If we beleive the Naturalists this desire extends to insensible things They tell us of divers Plants that can neither encrease nor fructifie without company as the Palm amongst others And can Man after this without violating in some measure the rights of Nature despise his union with Woman that is to say what she has of most compleat and charming T is true as the Ancients say that Man is of a nature absolutely Heroical that can innocently excuse himself from her But how ridiculous and unjust is he add they that despise Marriage the first and purest of Societies But Sir if you would know the real motives of Marriage you are only to consider Man with relation to the four bodies whereof he is composed I shall call the first The Body Natural The second The Body Politick The third The Body Domestick And the fourth The Body Ecclesiastick Mankind State Family and Church are these four Bodies With relation to mankind he is Man To the State he is Citizen To the Family he is Son And to the Church he is Faithful These four qualities put him equally under the obligigation of Marriage As Man he ought to labour for the propagation of mankind As Citizen for the preservation of the Common-wealth As Son he ows Successors to his Family and as Faithful he owes Elect ones to the Church Marriage is absolutely necessary to fulfill all these duties and to discharge all these engagements They ought to be explain'd to you more at length To begin with the first point It is certain that every Animal is oblig'd to interest himself in the conservation of his Species but particularly Man who is king of all T is for him that all the rest were made and without him the world would be but a frightfull Solitude For this reason God commanded him to increase and multiply immediately after his Creation And for the same reason he inspir'd him with the desire of it and gave him that eager inclination of Cooperating with another Sex wherewith all men as I have said are naturally transported It must be granted that there is nothing in nature either so violent or so necessary Without this love where 's that man that would converse with woman where 's the woman that would endure man But to the end that no abuse might be made thereof God has assigned it bounds he has fixed it between two persons he has confined it to the sacred laws of Marriage Be it as it will if it is mans duty to increase his Species it is no less his duty to marry since one cannot reasonably be done without the other Man may be considered in a double sence vel Physice vel Theologice In the Theological prospect nothing is more dispisable it 's true 't is a revolted Subject It is a sinful creature It is an object of Horror to Heaven and Earth It is a composition of crimes and miseries Man says the Prophet in this respect is nothing but Vanity If one should weigh him with nothing he would be found even lighter They are all says he elsewhere corrupted and become abominable by their works Psal 14.1 There is not one doth good But in the Physical and Natural sence what is more admirable than Man O God said the same David What is Man that thou shouldst remember him and the Son of Man that thou shouldst be so careful of him Thou hast made him but a little less than the Angels Thou hast crowned him with glory and honour Thou hast given him the Empire of all things here below In this respect the Philosopher regards him as the end of all Creatures Nos sumus quodam modo sinis omnium Arist St. Austin likewise instructs us that all things are comprised in him In homine est omnis creatura He considers him as the miracle of Nature Homo magnum est miraculum And our eloquent Cicero will have him to be of more worth than all other creatures together Homo caeteris animalibus longe praestat I add that this same Theology which lessens him so much when it considers him in the irregularities of Nature exalts him to the highest Heaven to the society of Angels to the glory of Eternity when it considers him in those Priviledges which Grace confers upon him
Man then is without dispute what there is most precious and recommendable in the world And yet it is the fruit of Marriage It is from thence it derives its Original What greater motive can one present him with in order to dispose him to it Every one naturally covets to signalize himself in the imployment he professeth and to perform those things which may procure him the commendation of Posterity T was this ambition that gave us the Speeches of a Demosthenes the Orations of a Cicero and so many other master-pieces of the mind which we read with so much pleasure What else has made immortal the Apelles the Michael-Angeli the Titians and all those other famous Artists of Antiquity whose works the curious still buy and value more than Gold And what if man is so much affected at the glory of making either a good book or an excellent Picture or a curious Statue is it possible that he should be insensible of the glory of composing Men that is to say other selves that is to say most lively Ideas of the Divinity such noble frames that all the Gold of the Indies can never purchase and are of more account than the world it self What can be more admirably noble than this ambition If man in particular is of so great price of what esteem should all in general be And if the desire of giving some individuals to Human-kind ought to dispose us for Marriage how much more the preservation of his whole body which absolutely depends thereon The single use of reason in Beasts if one may say they have reason is to secure their lives from dangers but its great use in men is to multiply theirs and to encrease their kinds Vniversis animalibus data est ratio brutis tantum ad vitam tuendam Homini autem ad propagandam says Actantius Those good Sparks of the Town who know so well the use of Women will not fail to say that one may without Marriage accomplish this end of Nature They not only say it but put it in practice Without going any further those Hospitals that have been so wisely set up at Paris to receive the fruits of their debauchery are too sencible testimonies of it to make the least doubt O God! how many Maidens ruined how many Famalies dishonoured by those lascivious Libertines what crimes what abominations what iniquities are committed in the world upon this subject Heu heu perpetuo debuit illa legi Ovid Tast l. 4. My reply to this false reasoning is this that one can never lawfully use Women out of Marriage under any pretence whatsoever I have sufficiently proved it in my second part Cicero says very well that man is the only creature that is brought forh with modesty and shame Hoc solum animal natum pudoris ac verecundiae particeps Cic. de finib But if we should believe those persons no animal would enjoy less In effect what is more impudent than all those Whoremongers of profession who avoid Marriage only to indulge themselves the more in this filthy pleasure there are no kind of infamies which they don't commit They make no conscience of any thing For says the Apostle It would be even indecent to say those things which are done by them in secret Eph. 5. Unhappy Sinners who oppose the most natural of their duties only to confirm themselves in the most criminal of habits whatsoever they may assert as the multiplication of Men is the undoubted end of Marriage it is certain that Marriage is the only means it has ordained and whereof it will make use to that end In its pure maxims all other ways of peopling the world are unlawful and prohibited 'T is what she has even imprinted in the hearts of all honest men Those States that acted only by their Principles and to whom the orders of God were unknown have not ceased to recommend Marriage as the most necessary of Societies and to forbid Incontinence as the shame of humanity I have already made it appear there needs no more upon this head But Sir if we would be intirely convinced that Forâ—ication Polygamy and Concubine-keeping are no lawful ways of multiplying men and that nothing more displeases Heaven consider the Countries where these kinds of Liberties are permitted Do you imagine that the Jews the Mahometans and the Pagans who live in all these disorders encrease their Species more than the Christians who abhor them It is certain that they are even less fertile Did you never make reflection upon the Sheep and the Wolves The first produce but once a year and only one Lamb at each time Notwithstanding altho' an infinite number of them is eaten every day the earth is covered with them The last on the other side generate many times a year and bring forth no less than six or seven little ones Besides being improper for the nourishment of men their number is not lessened for this use And yet we know that there are but few of them seen in comparison of Sheep Who makes a doubt that there is a particular Providence therein It is exactly the same with all those prohibited Unious whereof I have treated and with lawful Marriage Who would not say that Turkey Persia Japan and all those other Countrys where it is permitted to have several Wives and various Concubines must be infinitely populous and yet they are less numerous than Europe Altho' the Bed of Christians consists but of two persons it doth not cease to be much more fertile than that of all these Infidels as manifold as it is There is no appearance of reason in refering this to the single climate and particular constitution of Men. There is without dispute somewhat of mystery therein God and nature were pleased to let us know by the same that the union of one man with one single woman is the real method one must pursue for the propogation of mankind Do we not know likewise that almost all those Whores and debanch'd Women who are the scandal of their Sex are barren and that the greatest part of them need not make use of a thousand sorts of criminal ways to become so as they do every day It remains then to conclude that nothing but Marriage can really and lawfully accomplish this first end of Nature and therefore it is of indispensible obligation to Men. The quality of Citizens of the world and members of the State is a reason of no less force to dispose them to it Aristotle says that Man is an Animal naturally politick This is very true Scarce were Men upon the Earth but they thought how to erect themselves into a Body into a Common-wealth and into a Kingdom The most barbarous people have voluntarily submitted themselves either to a Monarchy or to an Aristocracy or else to a Democracy Monarchy without doubt is the best of the three because it comes nearest to the Divinity But they are all lawful and permitted of God add
after death Harbour not an opinion Sir that my Adversaries are better grounded in the Second than in the first part of their Criticks They reason equally amiss in both You have seen the weakness of their objections in relation to women I hope to perswade you that they have not more reason in those which they prefer against Marriage it self First say they Marriage is unworthy of Man It puts him in some measure in the rank of Beasts Secondly it is repugnant to his happiness because deprives him of liberty without which he can never be happy What propositions are here Is it not formally to contradict St. Paul who says of Marriage That it is honourable for all Men ' Is it not a pretending to be wiser than God who has pronounced that it was advantagious for man not to be alone and to have a wise like him But let us observe what arguments these Persons bring to support such erroneous opinions Man say they is born not so much for the actions of the body as for those of the mind That proper figure that erected head which he has received from Nature incites him to despise all sensual things and to apply himself to the meditation of coelestial ones Os homini sublime dedit Ovid. Metam L. 1. Fab. 2. coelumque tueri Jussit erectos ad Sydera tollere vultus As his Soul is the most noble part of himself he ought likewise chiefly to discharge those Functions which are agreeable to it How opposite are those of Marriage to the excellency of his Original what is more inferiour what more animal Is it not the order of Justice that the weakest should submit to the strongest and what can any one approve that so precious and divine a thing as the Soul should condescend so far as to pursue the brutal appetites of the flesh that it should renounce the right of commanding to put it self under a necessity of obeying and that it should descend from the Throne of Reason to confine it self under the Empire of the Senses ought not this reason to hold the Reins against the concupiscible appetite as well as the irascible Is it fit that to satisfy the custom of a Countrey or private interests or the Transports of an inconsiderate youth it should yield it's right of Sovereignty to this simple passion Domina omnium Regina Ratio Reason is the Queen and Mistress of all things and ought to command the passions as Cicero observes Velut servo Dominus velut Imperator militi velut Parens filio In Marriage this order is overthrown Here the passions command and draw Reason away in spite of it self in order to obtain those things which it doth not approve of because it esteems them contrary to that real wisdom which consists in the subduction of all the Motions of the inferior part of the Soul Let the Brutes accompany as long as they will Let them enter if they please into that filthy commerce of the Union of both Sexes necessary to generation pursuant to a blind Instinct But what ought not Man that noble Creature who descended from the blood of Heroes and Gods to entertertain higher thoughts and to apply himself to somewhat more worthy of his Original In a word as much as the Spirit exceeds the flesh and an Angel Man so much ought Celibacy to be more excellent than Marriage Those who live therein resemble in some sort the happy Souls and anticipate the Time of that Life which is to come What can be more glorious for Man than to do upon Earth what is done in Paradice To imitate Angels and Saints who live in the Virginity of an eternal Celibacy Jesus Christ himself lived in that condition He was never married It is said of those priviledged Persons who in the Revelations follow the Lamb wheresoever he goes that they are Virgins and were never defiled with women If one may believe an Author of a great Character we ought to refer to Marriage these words of the Apostle Rom. 8. Those who are in the flesh can never please God For he has employed this Text to celebrate the Praises and Necessity of the Batchellors State especially in regard of Ecclesiasticks Behold what the Enemies of Marriage alledge for the support of their first Proposition Nothing doubtless could be finer than this reasoning if the effects answered the words But Sir most unhappily they do not These persons represent to us a Man of the other world and not of this we live in They alledge what it is to be wish'd we were but what we shall never really be till we are dispossess'd of this infirm body wherewith our Souls are cloath'd We are by nature too far engaged in the Empire of the Senses to be able to break off our correspondence with them nothing 't is true can be of more advantage to us Nothing more worthy of our desire But what Homo sum humani à me nihil alienum puto Terent. Heaut I 'm a Man and therefore I 'm not ashamed to own the consequence of humanity Where is the Man that is not subject to make this confession Who likewise do you imagine these ill declaimers are who would pass for Wits and be distinguish'd from the vulgar I am perswaded that if one examined their conduct one should find that Marriage is more necessary for them than for an infinite number of others in whom they condemn it This precept of a true Orator Doce facienda doce faciendo has no relation to them They teach but they don't act They shew the way that ought to be pursued but they do not march in it themselves as our Saviour reproach'd the Pharisees Where is the advantage of knowing Vertue if one leaves it unpractised Non est beatus qui scit illa sed qui facit says Seneea How contrary is man to himself how different how various Had not Ovid reason to say Pectoribus mores tot sunt Ovid. de Arte. Am. quot in orbe figurae In my second part I have shewn you persons so possessed with the love of Women that they declare themselves incapable of withstanding them They argue for nothing but their necessity Behold now some who are directly opposite to them They are for dispensing with their absence They maintain that they are not necessary What contrariety A man needs only to consult with himself in order to judge that these last are even more unreasonable than the first For these are at least more sincere They speak according to their Sentiments Concordat Sermo cum vitâ They talk as they live But those are Impostors who feel not what they speak but would be taken for persons much exalted above the passions when they are oftentimes enslaved to them Their dissimultation doth not cease to procure them praises Men who examine but the outside and who only judge of things by appearances imagine that there are heroical and very extraordinary Qualities in
such infinite care has been taken to cause an exact observation of Marriage Is it a wonder that in the Republick of Lycurgus the haters of it should be excluded from publick sports Spectacles and entertainments Can one be surprised that in the Common-wealth of Plato Batchelors of 35 years were accounted infamous In a word it is miraculous that in all times and even amongst the barbarous Nations a particular deference has been payed to married men and that Marriage has been much more esteemed than Celibacy It is Sir the foundation of the world and the inexhaustable source of Families 'T is that which gives Citizens to Cities Inhabitants to Provinces and Subjects to Kingdoms 'T is that which affords Kings to People and People to Kings 'T is that which furnishâ— the Country with Labourers the Tribunals with Judges the Churches with Preachers and the Armies with Souldiers 'T is that which has producâ—â— Heroes on Earth and Gods in Heaven Poets have married Gods as well as Men. Saturne had his Cebelâ— and Jupiter his Juno both which have been Mothers of several of those false Divinities which Pagan antiquity formerly adored In a word 't is Marriage that gives life to Arts and Sciences That keeps up Traffick That maintains Societies and to which 〈◊〉 owing the greatest part of those wholâ— some Laws and prudent Disciplineâ— without which the world would bâ— but a Cavern of Thieves Can it bâ— too much esteemed after this And needs there any more to prove thaâ— nothing is better or more excellent if you except a real continence Yes Sir there is required more for one may make appear that it such in a manner yet more convincingly You will be satisfied of iâ— if you consider it with me First as the bond of the most perfect most sweet and most wholsome of all humane conjunctions And Secondly as the exercise of the most lawful most agreeable and most absolute authority of the world Nothing unquestionably is more perfect than this union in respect to its subject to its end and to its manner Marriage unites Man and Woman that is to say what there is of most excellent and most perfect in the corporeal nature what resembles in it self all the Beautys of this great Universe what alone is of more value than all the other Creatures together In sine what by the understanding and reason with which it is endowed to the exclusion of all other Creatures has merited the glorious name of the Image of God What do you imagine to be the first part of this subject It is a Celestial Soul It is an immortal Spirit an angelical and immaterial Substance It is a being that partakes in some sort of that of God himself Seneca goes yet further When he considers its excellency he will have it to be God himself who that as I may say is come to lodge within our bodies Quid aliudvoces animam nisi Sen. Ep. 32. Deum in humano corpore hospitem 'T is that makes St. Austin say That after God nothing is better than the Soul Anima post Deum nihil melius As to the Body which is the other part that Marriage unites in the Man and woman we may affirm that as miserable as it is in relation to its substance and to the various accidents to which it is subject it is notwithstanding the most perfect and most excellent work of Nature in respect of its composition which as the Psalmist so ellegantly asserts is all embroadery of its aim which is to serve as an organ to the Soul and to be as it were its Ornament Corpus est vestimentum animae says St. Chrysoslom The Body is the Garment of the Soul and in a word of its use which is to be imployed in the most noble most necessary and most important actions of life Behold then the first perfection of Maraiage viz. That it unites Bodies and Souls that it joynes together the two finest Creatures in the World That it is a composition that is most rare and precious in the essence of things This kind of Union is seen no where else nor in any other subject The Conjunction of the Stars is a Union purely corporeal the Copulation of Beasts is a Union purely carnal Fornication is a Union of Body without Soul And Friendship as strong as it may be betwixt two friends is notwithstanding but a Union of Souls without Body There is nothing but Marriage that truly unites Bodies and Souls togather Its second perfection consists in its end which according to nature is to multiply men according to grace is to encrease the number of the Elect and according to Nature and Grace to retain the Sexes in the bounds of Wisdom Modesty and Honesty in removing the disorders of debauchery What can be more worthy of God and Man than this End I say in the last place that the manner of this Union likewise makes up one of its beauties Marriage doth not only joyn the Bodies it also unites the Souls 'T is much I confess but there is still something incomparably greater It not only unites Bodies and Souls but O surprising wonder of two Bodies and two Souls it makes one and the same Person Man and Wife says Jesus Christ are no more two but one flesh Aristotle affirms of a real friendship that it is a soul which inhabits in two Bodies But the union of Marriage is still much more intimate They are no more two Bodies but one single Body no more two Souls but one single Soul They are no longer two Bodies tyed to one Soul No longer two Souls confounded in one Body 'T is a something I know not what which is not absolutely one or t'other but is more than both and cannot be expressed Possibly the Comick Poet thought of nothing less than to represent to us the wonder of this Union when he made the diverting peice of his Amphytrion It is notwithstanding what he doth after the most natural way imaginable in the Scene of the two Sosias He makes them to be of so perfect a resemblance that they look upon one another as one and the same person They are not at all distinguishable They are two in number yet but one in action and movement They always speak by I and not by We. They do not say thou art there and I am here but I am there I am here Plautus expresses it in his Language with an emphasis we cannot render in ours What you would persuade me no body ever heard says Amphytrion to Sosia that one man should be at the same time in two different places Nemo unquam homo antehac Vidit Plnut Amphyt Act 2. Sc. 1. nec potest sieritempore uno Homo idem duobus locis ut simul sit By what inconceiveable art could it be that thou wast at the same moment here and in the House Quo id maliâ—m pacto potest Fieri nunc uti tu hic sis Domi id dici volo
legis Oh faithless good how much ill does thy smooth looks conceal What satisfactions soever the Libertines find in such wanton imbraces early or late says Seneca they are converted into punishments Sen. Ep. 25. Sed ipsae voluptates in tormenta vertuntur All this is most true Experience proves it every day in an incontestable manner and yet men will not refrain this evil conduct They take delight in such an error and are pleased with so agreeable a madness It is a Sea wherein they take a pleasure to drown themselves They hold to this unhappy vice with indissoluble chains Toto corpore omnibus unguiculis as the Proverb We may distinguish three sorts of persons that are engaged in the shameful commerce of the flesh The one seeks after it by inclination and make it their chiefest good Another sort continues it because they cannot get rid thereof being retained as it were in spight of themselves by force and custom and by the fatality of their temperature The last apply themselves to it both by inclination and custom but they look upon this sin as a piece of gallantry and as a mode in Society which they are allowed to follow with others and without hazard All these offenders equally deserve your horrour Place Sir in the first rank all those Libertines of Profession All those Epecureans All those Sardanapali who only study to satisfie the irregular appetites of Nature whose Belly is their God and who seek their glory in their proper confusion as an Apostle says They are naturalized into their offence It is their very Element They are so pleased with their condition that they are extream unwilling to leave it Like true Swine they love to abide in their uncleanness For whom has this fair Sex been made that is the ornament of the world if not for man say these Debauchees where can he find more delight than in the bosom of a fine woman Have not these mortal Goddesses been embraced by the Gods themselves those Gods that are so much above humanity Have they not quited all the charms of Olympus in order to enjoy here below their voluptuous imbraces and yet forsooth we to whom nature has given them in possession must not be affected with them or if we are as it is impossible not to be since one single regard of theirs is able to enflame the heart urit videndo faemina Virg. Georg. we must be prohibited to repeat our caresses and to be enamour'd of them What say they still we are born with dispositions that draw us impetuously towards this charming object and we must exert all our cares to remove our selves from it Nature it self shall give us an extream hunger after this dilicious food and we must not be satisfied with it in the midst of that abundance we have thereof If this ardent desire of ours was not lawful Nature doubtless would not have afforded us the same Nihil censeamus esse malum quod sit a Natura datum hominibus says the Father of eloquence And if it is good why should we not receive its influence But add these infamous Men if it is lawful to use women and to make these amorous thefts which the great Jupiter himself has so often preferred to all the glory of his Throne must not a man be a fool to be eternally fix'd to one and to deprive himself by this means of the pleasing liberty of change Natura diversis gaudit What is there in effect that is more acceptable to man than variety of meats and that happy diversity of all things which this good Mother affords him Is it possible that this man for whom she has made all things should enjoy less priviledge than Beasts and that she would connect him to one single Woman whilst she grants to other creatures the lisence of taking what they please those to whom se has given infinitely less inclination for this pleasure than to Man Has not this likewise obliged a thousand people of the world to establish Poligamy Letters of Divorce and even some to render all Women common in Society Happy the Country that is destitute of such Monsters Happy if Christendom were void thereof and they inclosed in those miserable places where reason is extinguished and where men have nothing of Man but the Name Sunt quidam non re sed nomine homines as the Roman Orator Can one imagine that there should be found of them any where else Can it be believed that a thing of such absolute impiety and baseness Nihil est aut nequius aut turpius effaeminato viro should come into a good and civilized Nation But alass they are every where The wisest people and best ordered States are no more exempt than others What horror Sir ought one to conceive for these persons who have as it were sworn upon the very Alters to continue all their life in the application of this Sin and to make it all the Paradise they allow of As if this very nature which has consin'd our inclination to the other Sex and which for the propogation of Man-kind makes us ardently covet the same had not given us a reason to discern good and evil and to rule our desires As if she had not placed in our minds impressions of shame which are not to be effaced without ceasing to be Man As if one of her first Lessons which she gives us was not temperence and sobriety As if one of her principal ends was not also to distinguish us from Bruits in subjecting all our senses to the empire of reason As if the same nature did not instruct us that the pleasure of virtue is yet much greater than that of voluptuousness Major est virtutis jucunditas Cic. in Verrem L. 1. quam ipsa voluptas quae percipitur ex libidine cupidate In a word as if the real happiness to which she makes us tend did not consist in the practice of things which are most agreeable to the excellence of our being and which make us approach nearest to that Divinity from whom we receive it The offenders of the second order are unquestionably very culpable but they are I confess much less than those of the first They deserve an infinite blame 't is true for being engaged in such criminal habits but they are in some sort worthy of our praises for being displeased therewith and for desiring to quit them He that affirmed habit to be a second nature has not hit amiss It must be granted that nothing is of more force and that there is a great diffculty in its conquest Vincere consuetudinem dura est pugna as St. Austin says And to speak with Seneca the Tragedian Dediscit animus sero quod didicit diu Sen. in Troad Act. 9. It 's very hard to forget what one has learnt by a repeated practice and a wound often renewed is long in curing Vulnus iteratum tardius sanatur Tedious is the cure of a repeated
Sir that they are all likewise very necessary Nothing is more fatal to Society than Anarchy Where there is no Superior all the world aims at being so Men live in an eternal confusion The Laws are dispossessed of their Authority Every one leads himself by his own fancy and the impunity of a crime causes so prodigious a relaxation in manners that one sees nothing but Seditions Murders Rapes Cicer. pro Milone and Violences Quis ignorat maximam illecebram esse peccandi impunitatis Spes How excellent I beseech you ought that good to be which is opposed to so great an evil If Anarchy is the principle of so many disorders to mankind what advantages doth he not reap from Monarchy and those other politick Governments whereof I have spoken In a word what can one imagine to be of more importance for him then the holy State of Marriage which alone furnishes him with Subjects and Soveraigns for those many Empires of the world which retain men in the duty of concord correspondence and Justice In all times that man has been esteemed very happy and worthy of the praises of posterity who exposes himself for the safety of the Republick Dulce decoru prom Patria mori Horat. Car. l. 3. c. 2. 'T is charming and noble to dye for our Country But if it be glorious to dye for his Country methinks it should be much more to live and to marry for its sake A Father that presents it with five or six Children brought up in virtue contributes oftentimes much more to its preservation than a Captain who has secured it from a hundred Enemies 'T is certain then that man is under a double obligation to labour both for the propogation of mankind and the subsistence of that state wherein he is engaged If Marriage is necessary for the one it is no less for the other The best way of serving his Prince and Country doubtless is to furnish him with a great number both of brave Subjects and wise Citizens sit for those uses which may advantage the Publick This consideration has been a motive to several People of the World not only to speak of Marriage with praise but also to reward its fertillity with magnificence The Romans appointed publick honours to those women who had brought into the world seven or eight Children and with a Pension that answered the Glory of their Empire they gave a place in the Capitol to their Statues In effect Marriage as I have said is the safety of the Republick since it is the only Nursery from whence proceeds all its Captains all its Magistrates all its Hand crafâ—smen and in a word all those different sorts of Subjects whose various imployments and perpetual Subordination one to the other make up the subsistance of States and of the whole World As much then as Man is concerned in his own preservation and that of his Country so much is he obliged to Marry If this general Interest ought to dispose Man for Marriage there is a particular one that obliges him to it much more It is the Interest of his Family What would become of that without Marriage one Generation would see it begin and end The quality of Father which is in life most worthy of our ambition would appertain but to few Persons What ought we to esteem dearer than our Blood and what nobler Jealousie can we be inflamed with than to leave behind us a numerous Posterity Why do you imagine has Nature given Men an inclination to labour to occasion themselves a thousand Cares and a thousand Difficulties to heap up Riches a hundred times more than they ought for themselves I make no doubt but it is because she has likewise given them an Inclination to multiply and to produce Children to whom they leave the fruits of their watchings and industry One may affirm that this is the design of all honest Men even those Batchelors that collect great Riches very often do it for the Advancement of their Nephews and always from a Prospect of supporting their Families There is nothing perhaps more reasonable than this Duty If we believe St. Paul He is worse than an Infidel who is unmindful of his Family Do not suppose Sir that he has regard only to those who neglect the Subsistence and Education of their Children He speaks likewise of those who being uncapable of preserving Continence neglect the means of having any and who rather than Marry choose to let their Race be extinguished and to efface their Names from the Memory of Men. Worse than an Infidel O good God! what can be worse than an Infidel in the World that is to say than a Turk or a Pagan It must be granted that the Apostle could never more expresly recommend Marriage than by expressing himself in that manner But it must be likewise agreed that nothing ought to be more pressing to determine Men for it For in a word what has been long since asserted is very true Filii sunt Columnae familiarum Children are the Pillars of Families Children are the only support of Families without them they must of Necessity fall they must be reduced to nothing What was more insupportable to the Jews than the Unfruitfulness of their Wives or their own They lookt upon it as a sort of Curse and they valued not all the other Advantages of Life while they were deprived of the Blessing of Children Consider in Genesis the Complaints of a Sarah and a Rachel upon this Occasion I know very well that the sending of the Messias who had been promis'd to our first Parents was to these Persons a particular Motive to desire Children every one hoping to receive in his Family that invaluable Present of Heaven But I am sensible at the same time that many of them sigh'd after Successors from the single Prospect of contributing somewhat to the Subsistence of their Nation and Family and that they only requested Children because they lookt upon them as the most excellent Possession of the World as indeed they are 'T is what the Psalmist nobly represents to us in the 127th Psalm The Israelites were so violently fond of having Children that they apprehended there could be no severer Punishment for them than to pass away their Lives either in Barrenness or Celibacy God has taken away my Reproach said Rachel when she was delivered of Joseph her first-born The Daughter of Jephtah likewise declares to us the same thing Judges 11. this unhappy Father having for the accomplishment of his rash vow condemned her to the civil death of a perpetual Retreat according to the opinions of the best Authors She requested of him a Damosel or two in order to go and lament her Virginity for two Months Amongst a thousand things she had to regret in leaving the world she esteems nothing more worthy of her tears than to have been unmarried and incapable of marrying I am perswaded that the Batchelors had the same desire
them Which made Virgil to observe Ah! hodiè laus est non ultima fingere vultum Alas None of the least Praises now adays is to dissemble So much is Vertue despised and Sincerity out of use in the world To enter into the bottom of the dispute I make a proposition directly contrary to that of my Adveriaries Marriage say they is not agreeable to man It is for his glory not to marry And I affirm that Marriage doth agree with Man It is necessary for him He cannot well forbear it The first part of this work very clearly proves the truth of my Proposition since God has instituted Marriage since our Saviour has confirm'd it since the Apostles have recommended it since all Nations of the World have practised it since it conveys to man such great advantages can one doubt of its agreement with him and if it is thus excellently good as I have maintain'd it all along can one assert that it is unworthy of man But let us see the Reasons upon which it's Adversaries rely in order to cry it down They all return to these three First It is repugnant to the Empire of Reason over the Senses and Passions Secondly It puts man in the rank of Beasts Lastly it hinders him from resembling the Angels One may reply to all this in few words What Logick is this Reason is in man what the King is in the State It ought to subject all to it self and to submit it self to nothing All the passions should condescend to it but it should never yield it self to any of them Therefore Marriage doth not agree with Man Therefore man ought not to marry Can there be more miserable arguing One grants the Principle Reason ought to govern the passions It ought to be the Mistress But where have these men learnt that Marriage is contrary to its Sovereignty One may from this principle infer conclusions absoluetly opposite to theirs Reason ought to govern the passions by consequence Marriage is necessary for Man Why because the Passions are much stronger in Celibacy than in Marriage because Marriage is it self a means to tame the Passions because Reason governs them consequently with more easiness But say they it ought to triumph over them It ought to captivate them Reason ought that I may so speak to swallow up the passions This is an evil Doctrine equally unknown in the School of God and that of Men. The passions are good in themselves They are become criminal only by the pollution of Sin which has disorder'd them Man must not be absolutely dispossess'd of them they are essential to him He cannot even live with integrity according to St. Austin without their assistance Affectus animi qui non habent recte non vivunt The Indolence of the Stoicks has been at all times condemned Man neither can nor ought ever to be without Passion The simple Question is to rectify it by reducing it into that happy Limit above or beneath which vertue cannot subsist Est modus in rebus sunt certi denique fines Hor. Serm. lib. 1. sat 1. Quos ultra citraque nequit consistere rectum There are certain means and limits of things which bound right on either side One ought to place it under the just law of Reason without which it ceases to be legitimate For appetitus lege naturae subjectus est rationi as St. Ambrose says And without that St. Austin tells us that Passion is nothing but the motion of the Beast Affectio sine ratione motus est bestialis Now of all things that are able to father his Empire of Reason upon the passions I affirm that there is nothing more efficacious than Marriage St. Paul sees nothing fitter to dispose men to wisdom By consequence I have reason to say and my adversaries are in the wrong to deny it that Marriage is very worthy of man and absolutely necessary for him even according to their own principle As animal as the action of Marriage is it is notwithstanding very conformable to right Reason and the Nature of man One may say that man is a mixt animal He is neither all Flesh nor all Spirit he is a compositum of both He has a Body he has a Soul Each of these two parts of this Being applies it self to those objects which are suitable to it and agreeable to its Nature As the Soul is of a coelestial and immaterial Original its single prospect is to exalt it self above sensible things But the body which is terrestrial follows its natural destination All it's motions tend downward It proposes to it self nothing but the enjoyment of Creatures Man by his Soul has the honour to be the Image of God and the Companion of Angels But indeed by his Body he enters in some sort in communion of Nature and Society with Beasts He doth in this regard what they do The same accidents happen to him He has the same desires He is touched with the same Objects ans has no priviledge over them in this respect Those ancient Heroes who gave terror and admiration to the whole world by the force of their judgments and the excellency of their Genius have not fail'd to be subject to the concupiscible appetites as well as the vilest of animals After having equal'd themselves to the Gods in the superior part of their being they must resemble beasts by the insurmountable Law of the inferior part I confess that it is very mortifying for the King of Animals not to be distinguish'd herein from his Subjects and to encrease after the same manner and by the same ways as they But be not surprized at it This was necessary for the design of their common Creator He has of a sudden and without distinction of Sex form'd that innumerable multitude of Spirits which compose the Hierarchy of Angels and Devils because being incorruptible intelligences they were by consequence incapable of generation But God having been pleased to make all human-kind of one blood as the Apostle says and by way of generation it was necessary to give to Man an Organized body It was necessary to render him capable of multiplying It was expedient for him to make two Sexes In a word it was convenient to give them that natural desire of uniting together which makes the propagation of the kind but which is never lawful without Marriage Can one assert after this that it is unworthy of man with relation to this Union of Sexes As despicable as it is in it self is it not sufficient that it is the design of Nature and the very order of God who has commanded us to encrease and multiply in order to rase all the Scandal which the most scrupulous persons might receive from thence As I have already said it is as conformable to reason as agreeable to the nature of man Reason it self disposes men to it In general it approves of all that is design'd by Providence And in particular it suffers man to practise
exquisitely fair unmeasurably rich extreamly virtuous she is not fit for you Of what service is all that to you if you are the object of her aversion This evil Sir is almost without remedy What cares soever you may take to win the heart of a wife who is only yours by the force of paternal Authority you will find it extreamly difficult to go through with it Never have any thoughts for marriage Sir unless you resolve to practise all these precepts I could add still many others But these are the chief and they suffice to make a good marriage The mischief is that people do not stop here and that almost all those who marry act herein by motives disengaged from the subject they look after The person which they take is a thing of the least regard with them They are determined by particular considerations This enters into their design but by accident and after the rest If she has a Fortune If she can draw me out of necessity If she belongs to persons who by their Credit are able to advance me it is enough says one I demand no other advantage If besides all this she is handsom well shaped and vertuous so much the better It is a double happiness for me But in case this doth not appear the rest remaining I shall not fail to marry her What destruction of Maxims and good Sense Now certainly to choose a wife with whom one may propose to live happily a man is only to consider if she pleases him If she be deserving and if she be derived from honest parents Whether she be rich or poor it imports not Dummodo morata veniat Dotata est satis This without dispute is the directest way of reasoning After having given you precepts for the attaining to a happy Marriage it is at present necessary to afford you some in order to live happily therein They all consist in the practice of two sorts of Duties towards two sorts of Persons The one regard the wife and the others refer to the Children The good or evil of marriage proceed alone from these two parts There was reason to say Est uxor aut tutum refugium aut penale tormentum She is also as another Author has it either the ruine or safety of the Family Mulier domi damnum est aut Salus On another side the wise man informs us that Children are the Joy or sorrow of their parents according as they are well or ill inclined This renders the matter which remains to be treated of in order to fullfil the design of this work very important It is Sir so much the more in that by acquitting your self of the duties whereof I shall discourse you will make your wife be a blessed Fountain to you at all times to speak with Solomon All the world is not happy enough to meet with this advantage The Precautions which one takes for this end are I confess sometimes unprofitable But it is almost infallible that a wife who by nature is not very reasonable shall become so if the Husband rules himself with relation to her according to my Instructions I begin them by declaring to you that if you would be happy in Marriage you must necessarily be loved of your wife You cannot be beloved of her if you do not love her Therefore be sure to love her This is the first Lesson a Husband ought to learn It comes from St. Paul Husbands says he Eph. 5.25.28 love your Wives as Christ loved his Church c. Would you know rhe reason Husbands ought to love their Wives as their own Bodies He that loves his wife loves himself No body ever hated his own Flesh By consequence the Husband ought to love his Wife for his wife is his own flesh They are no more two but one flesh What is more reasonable than this duty what ought to be more precious to us than our selves We ought then in the first place to love our wives by a motive of self-love since we cannot love our selves but we must love them being that I may so speak a part of our own substance Animae dimidium meae Horat. What a prodigious thing would it be to see a man declare himself an enemy to himself and to have an aversion for his own person St. Paul assures us that it was never seen and insinuates to us that it is a thing not to be seen in the order of Nature It is notwithstanding what arrives to all those who love not their wives A man ought in the second place to love his wife by a Motive either of personal Interest or pure acknowldgment Either she loves you or she doth not love you If she loves you you cannot without ingratitude forbear to love her On the other side if she loves you not you ought to love her to the end that she may be won to love you This Maxim of Seneca is of abfolute necessity in Marriage Si vis amari ama Love is gain'd only by Love It is not to be obtain'd by Force or Violence Amor extorqueri non potest says Seneca Naturally we love those who love us If we did otherwise we should be less reasonable than Brutes Amore dicimus vinci feras We say that the very Brute Beasts are overcome by Love Sen. Trag. A Philosopher of old time made these Questions and Answers What is most insupportable in life To love without being beloved What is the most unjust thing in the world To be beloved without loving What is most mortifying to a man To see himself compelled to hate what he has loved In a word what is most dreadful to him A love converted into hatred which becomes so much the more implacable as the other was passionate Semper bonus amicus gravis irascitur Our best Friends are always the most angry with us All this Sir is true and these are Axioms which make so many certain principles in the Morality of Men. A Husband that doth not love or who loves without being beloved is equally unhappy The true secret to support patiently the inconveniences of Marriage and to live happy therein is to love Miserable is he who marries without determining to love his wife and proposes only to embrace her Riches Meipsum igitur amare oportet non mea si veri amici futuri simus There is not a wife but has a right of using such language to her Husband nor a Husband but ought to observe the same to his wife After this Rule I cannot give you a better than to afford your self for an Example to your wife Of all the Maxims of the Christian Morality the most equitable and most certain is undoubtedly this to do to others what we would have done to our selves Would you be beloved of your wife Love her Would you have her wife Be so your self Would you have her complaisant to you Be you the same to her Would you have her make appear a sweetness of