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A44074 A treatise of marriage with a defence of the 32th article of religion of the Church of England : viz. bishops, priests and deacons are not commanded by God's law either to vow the state of single life, or to abstain from marriage : therefore it is lawful for them, as for all other men, to marry at their own discretion, as they shall judge the same to serve better to godliness. Hodges, Thomas, d. 1688. 1673 (1673) Wing H2324; ESTC R28670 53,897 120

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which every Christian whether married or single is bound to offer up unto God daily As for holiness Matrimony is not inconsistent with holiness witness Abraham Isaac and Jacob Aaron the servant of the Lord and Enoch that walked with God and yet did not forsake his wife and children and 't is observable that the Bosom of Abraham although a married person is used to set out Heaven by in the Scripture If Heaven had been set out by the Bosom of any Saint in Heaven that had always led a single life on earth what triumphs would Rome have made on that occasion And whereas 't is said Rev. 14.4 Those that follow the Lamb whithersoever he goeth these are they which are not defiled with women for they are Virgins Certainly Christ is followed whithersoever he goeth not only by the blessed Saints that have led a single life but also by married persons as Patriarchs Apostles Martyrs and innumerable others as the Scripture speaketh 2 Cor. 5.6 1 Thess 4.17 And the Apostle speaks of all kind of true Believers 2 Cor. 11.2 These are bought from among men to be first-fruits unto God and the Lamb these are dedicated as first-fruits used to be unto God They are called 't is thought Virgins because they adhered to Christ when the Whore of Babylon had made all the Kings and Nations of the earth drunk with the cup of her fornication It is conceived this place may have reference to those Israelites that were inticed to Idolatry by the Midianitish women and 't is frequent in Scripture to call or compare Idolatry to Adultery or Fornication because God's people are betrothed and married unto him he is their Husband and they his Spouse and when they go after Idols they are said to give God a Bill of divorce and to go a whoring after other gods Or as Dr. Hamond on the place These are they which had kept pure from all the heretical Gnostick corruptions of uncleanness Where there is neither spiritual nor carnal Fornication or Adultery there is no defiling with women for the marriage-bed in Scripture-Dialect is the bed undefiled and to the pure all things are pure The unbelieving husband is sanctified by the believing wife and the unbelieving wife by the believing husband and therefore are their children holy If marriage was filthiness or uncleanness or a vice or that married persons could not please God doubtless the H. Ghost would never have said Marriage is honorable amongst all and therefore amongst Clergy men nor would our blessed Saviour have been born of a Mother though a Virgin yet espoused and married to a husband namely to Joseph Marriage one saith fills earth and Virginity heaven but if there were no Saints in earth how should there be any in heaven if earth were empty how could heaven be full of Saints He did not commend his Sex that said a woman was a necessary evil for how evil then must man be deemed for whom such an evil is necessary and I take him to be a fool as well as mad that being asked whether he was married he answered He was never so mad yet for I dare say there are more made sober than mad by marriage I presume that Hypochondriacal Melancholy a species of madness doth more seise and distract single than married married persons And confident I am as one saith that the Patriarchs did converse with many wives more chastely than many do now adays with one so that many live now more holily and chastely in Wedlock than others in their Cloysters and Cells And if when a voyce from heaven calls to single persons whether man or woman whether Ecclesiastical or Temporal persons Let every man have his own wife c. Let them not say or reply I do not meddle with any state that is common or unclean If they should I reply to them again What God hath cleansed or rather always accounted a pure holy and undefiled estate that call not thou common or unclean CHAP. III. Qualifications requisite in them that marry AS for the Qualifications of a Husband or Wife I would advise all to look at true Religion in the first place that those that marry may be said to marry in the Lord. If I mistake not this was that King James advised Prince Henry unto v. B.Δ. 2 b.p. 72. c. When Solomon married the Daughters of a strange god then he fell to tolerate if not to worship their Idols Next to Religion I should commend a Suitable Disposition and a Conformity in Manners that man and wife may delight in the society and converse one of another And as I would not have a man or woman marry meerly o● chiefly by their eyes or fancies so neither would I advise a marriage betwixt those that have an aversness or antipathy at first sight each to other I would have a natural free and unenforced affection before marriage When there is no other affection 'twixt parties than what is the fruit of Ratiocination or Syllogisms I would never perswade a marriage Syllogistical love such as is raised thus Every man must love his wife But this woman is my wife Therefore I ought to love her And so on the part of the woman in reference to her husband Every woman must love her own husband This man is my husband Therefore I must love him I say this love goes so far about that it is like to be long before it bring home affections Nature is always at hand and natural affections are up at first view but Reason Religion and Grace too are sometimes to seek or held off at distance by Passion 'T is true notwithstanding that those that match meerly by the eye many times meet with their match an eye-sore or a very thorn in their eye and that beauty which was a Loadstone to attract their love proves a snare to others and a torment to themselves whilst it draws others eyes to the same object and occasions jealousie And if neither of these happen as oftentimes both do yet a disease a sickness or at least old age changes the beautiful 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 into a Chaos and the most lovely countenance into an object in which thou wilt say I have no pleasure Next let me advise you not to marry by the ear not for honor or great parentage and noble Titles for these without virtue and money are of small value an empty sound a tinkling cymbal yea more discord than harmony for the most part in such matches and hence ordinarily is the worst sort of marriage-musick Imparity in birth and parentage makes odds where all should be even the one oft lords it in this case and the other is but a servant and a servant to to their fellow yoke-fellow a servant underling to all their high kindred and often despised by their own servants 'T is in such families oft as 't is in the Family of Hawks the males are the underlings and the females have the respect the glory