and deceiue me but aduerse and contrary things because they haue some bitternesse as bitter Potions doe make mee suspitious and fearefull I feare the euill more vvhich I doe priuily then that which I doe openly For the Temptor commeth boldly to the euill vvhich no man seeth which no man comprehendeth and where no man is feared which should finde fault vvith it and so iniquitie is more easily committed Truly there is Warre on both sides danger on both sides to be feared on both sides And euen as they which remaine in the Land of their enemies must looke on this side and that side and must turne their head about at euerie noise So the flesh suggesteth pleasant things to me the vvorld vaine things the Diuell bitter things because so often as a carnall cogitation doth importunately moue assaile my minde concerning meate and drinke sleepe and other like things belonging to the care and prouision of the flesh the flesh speaketh to me When a vaine thought is busied in my heart concerning worldly Ambition bragging and boasting it proceedeth from the world But when I am prouoked to anger and wrath and to bitternesse of minde it is a diuellish suggestion the which I must resist no otherwise then the Diuell himselfe neither must I any otherwise take heede and beware of it then of damnation it selfe It is the office of Diuels to bring in false suggestions it is our duite not to consent to them For so often as we resist them so often we ouercome the Diuell wee glad the Angels we honour God For he doth exhort and encourage vs that wee may fight hee helpeth vs that wee may ouercome hee beholdeth vs fighting he succoureth vs fainting hee crowneth vs conquering From whence the flesh of Man proceedeth and what it bringeth forth MOTIVE XV. MY flesh proceedeth from the clay and therefore I haue voluptuous thoughts from it vaine and curious cogitations from the world Three cruell enemies of man euill malitious suggestions from the Diuell These three enemies doe assaile persecute me somtime openly somtime secretly but alwaies malitiously For the Diuell trusteth most in the helpe of the flesh because a domesticall enemie doth most hurt and procureth greatest harme For she hath entered a league with him for my ruine ouerthrow and destruction to wit being borne of sinne and nourished in sinne corrupted vvith vices from the very beginning Flesh is corrupted be birth nurture and custome but made a great deale more vitious by euill custome From hence it proceedeth that she coueteth and lusteth so eagerly against the spirit that she continually murmureth and cannot abide good discipline and vvholsome correction because she suggesteth vnlawfull things will neither obey reason nor is brideled vvith any feare That wretched Serpent approacheth to her hee aydeth her hee vseth her being the olde and deadly enemie of mankinde who hath no other desire no other businesse no other exercise but to destroy our selues The continuall practise of the Diuell This is hee which imagineth mischiefe continually speaketh subtilly suggesteth artificially deceiueth craftily Hee inspireth wicked and vnlawfull motions raiseth warres nourisheth hatred stirreth vp gluttonie incenseth lust pricketh forward the vnbrideled desires of the flesh and prepareth baites and occasion of sinne and also assaulteth without ceasing the hearts of men with a thousand slights to hurt and destroy them From hence it falleth out that he beateth vs with our owne staffe bindeth our hands with our owne girdle and cutteth our throat with our owne knife so that the flesh which is giuen to vs for a helpe becommeth to vs ruine and hurt and is as a blocke in our way to make vs to stumble It is a grieuous combat and a great danger to fight against such a domesticall enemie especially seeing wee are strangers and hee a Citizen hee inhabiteth his owne Country we are banished men and strangers It is also great perill and danger to endure so often yea rather such continuall conflicts of his diuellish policie whom as well subtill nature as long exercise of his inueterate malice hath made so politicke and crafty Of the short life of man MOTIVE XVI THe day of man is as it were a shadow or rather a shadow vpon earth it hath no continuance and then it is properly nothing and more vaine then any thing when it seemeth to stand surest and to rest vpon a sound foundation Therfore why doth a couetous man hoord vp treasure here vpon earth so greedily The folly of rich men when both hee himselfe must passe away so suddenly also the treasure which he hath stored vp so carefully And in truth oh foolish man what fruit canst thou expect in the vvorld whose sweetest fruit is vtter ruine whose end is death and wofull destruction Would to GOD thou wert wise could vnderstand and carefully prouide in thy short life against the day of thy certaine and vncertaine death A notable description of the olde man or sinne I know one who many yeeres hath liued familiarly with thee hath sat downe at thy Table hath receiued meat from thine owne hand hath slept in thy bosome and when he would hath had priuate conference with thee He by hereditary law is but thy seruant But because from his tender yeeres thou hast pampered him delicately brought him vp very wantonly and hast spared the rod foolishly hee is now become stubborne and rebellious against thee Hee hath lifted vp his heele aboue thy head hee hath brought thee into slauish bondage and doth cruelly tyrannize ouer thee But peraduenture thou wilt say Who is hee It is thy olde man vvhich treadeth and trampleth thy Spirit vnder feete who disdaineth contemneth and reputeth lesse then nothing that blessed Land which is solely and wholy to be desired because nothing can giue a sweet taste or procure a pleasing rellish to his corrupted humour but onely such things as may please the wanton flesh and her vntemperate desires This man is blinde and deafe from his Natiuitie dumbe ancient with dayes many and euill rebellious against vertue opposite to verity an Enemie of the Crosse of Christ Hee scorneth derideth and flowteth the innocent and that man which walketh vprightly in truth and sincerity He busieth himselfe and intermedleth with great and wonderfull matters which doe farre exceede his weake capacitie and much surpasse the short reach of his dull doltish vnderstanding His arrogancie and impudent boldnesse is more then all his fortitude and forces hee dreadeth none nor standeth in awe of any but saith proudly in his doting foolishnesse There is no God Hee pineth and consumeth with good things he is also fed and nourished with other mens euils hee is fatted and cherished with vncleane thoughts and impure cogitations he is neuer tyred nor wearied with them rebelling and transgressing euen vnto the end hee disperseth scattereth abroad his owne like an vnthrifty wasting Prodigall he coueteth and raketh to himselfe other mens goods like
promiseth saying Verely I say vnto you that whatsoeuer yee aske praying beleeue that you shall receiue it and it shall be performed to you Doe not therefore make slight account of thy prayer because he to whom thou prayest doth not make slight account of it but before it passeth out of thy mouth God giueth that he knoweth to be best for vs. he willeth that it should be written downe in his Booke And we must vndoubtedly hope for one thing of two that eyther he will giue vs that vvhich we aske or that which he knoweth to be more profitable for vs. Thinke therefore the best whatsoeuer thou canst of God and the worst of thy selfe that thou maist thou oughtest to beleeue of him more copiously and amply then thou canst thinke Make account that thou hast lost all that time in which thou dost not thinke of God For all other things are none of our owne but the time onely is our owne Therefore finde leisure to serue GOD and wheresoeuer thou shalt be there be thou safe without danger Doe not wholy deliuer vp thy selfe to worldly affayres but vse the world as if thou vsedst it not In what place or state soeuer thou dost consist cast thy thoughts vpon God and ponder something belonging to thy Saluation in thy minde We must relie onely vpon God Therefore with all facilitie gathering thy minde together dwell freely with thy selfe and walke in the latitude and bredth of thy heart there prepare and make ready a large supping parlor for CHRIST for the minde of a wise man is alwaies with God We ought to haue him alwayes before our eyes by whom wee are liue and vnderstand For we haue him our Creator that we should be wee also ought to haue him our Teacher that we should be wise and the giuer of inward sweetnesse that wee may be blessed and in this wee know his Image in vs that is the Image of the most high Trinitie For as he is he is both wise and also good so also we according to our small measure both are and know that wee are and both loue to be and to know the same Therefore vse thy selfe as the Temple of GOD because of that vvhich is in thee like to God For it is the greatest Honour which can be performed to GOD to vvorship and to imitate him Thou doest imitate him if thou art godly for a godly minde is a holy Temple to God and the hart of a godly man the best Altar Thou doest worship him if thou art merciful He worshippeth God truly that doth the deeds of charitie as he is merciful vnto all For it is an acceptable sacrifice to God to doe good to all in regard of God Doe all things as the childe of God that thou maist be worthy of him who hath vouchsafed to call thee childe But in all things which thou dost God is present euery where know that God is present Beware therefore that neither thy eyes nor thy thoughts be fixed on that which breedeth a sinfull delight neither say nor doe that which is vnlawfull although it like thee neither offend God by any deed or gesture which being present euery where beholdeth whatsoeuer thou doest any where Thou hadst need to watch and looke to thy selfe narrowly because thou doest all things before the eyes of a Iudge which seeth all things cleerely Neuerthelesse thou needest not to stand in dread of him but art secure with him if thou prepare thy selfe to be such a one as he may vouchsafe in fauour to be present with thee but if hee be absent by grace yet is he present with thee by reuengement God correcteth them whom he loueth But woe be to thee if it be so with thee yea rather woe be vnto thee if he be not so vvith thee For God is angry vvith him whom he scourgeth not when he sinneth for he condemneth him in time to come perpetually whom hee doth not amend by scourging vvhen he liueth vvickedly A Consideration of Death MOTIVE VII IT is certaine that Death threatneth thee euery where the Deuill lieth in waite that hee may snatch away thy soule when it departeth out of thy body but feare thou not for GOD which dwelleth in thee if hee yet dwell in thee will deliuer thee from death God forsaketh none but such as willingly forsake him first and from the Deuill For hee is a faithfull friend neither doth hee forsake them which trust in him vnlesse he be first forsaken of them But hee is forsaken when the heart through wicked vile and vnprofitable cogitations roaueth hither and thither with a wandering vnderstanding Therefore thou must with all carefulnesse and vigilancy watch and keepe it that God may rest and remaine in it For in euery Creature which is busied and toiled in the vanities of the world vnder the Sunne Nothing in the world more noble then the heart of man nothing is more excellent then mans heart nothing more Noble nothing is found more like vnto God wherefore hee requireth no other thing of thee but thy heart How to purifie the heart Therefore cleanse the same by pure and sincere confession vnto God and continuall Prayer that thou maist see God with a pure and cleane heart by a continuall looking vpon God In euery place be thou subiect and intentiue to him and frame thy manners that he may be pleased in thee Loue all men inwardly and shew thy selfe louing to all that thou mayst be a peace-maker and the childe of God So thou shalt be a good childe like vnto thy heauenly Father also holy humble and righteous And when thou shalt be such a one be mindfull of mee to commend mee to GOD in thy prayers Woe bee to mee which say those things and doe them not Good words must be seconded with good deeds and if I doe them sometime I continue not long in them I haue those things in my memory and doe not obserue them in my life I haue them in my words and not in my conditions I ruminate and ponder the Law in my heart and my mouth all the day and doe things contrarie to the law I read of Religion in it and I loue Reading more then prayer Notwithstanding the holy Scripture doth teach me no other thing but to loue Religion to preserue Vnitie and to haue Charitie Some body waiteth and attendeth for mee desirous to speak to mee concerning his want and necessitie but I take some idle booke or other Immoderate reading must not let the practise of Charitie nor the exercise of Meditation which this man or that man commends vnto me I read in it and by immoderate reading I loose the practise of the fruits of Charitie the affections of piety the lamentation of compunction and heartie sorrow the profit of the holy Sacraments and contemplation of heauenly things Neuerthelesse nothing is found more sweet in this life nothing is receiued more delicious nothing doth
looking vpon my miserable wofull and distressed estate with thine eye of pitty wert willing to be scourged for me a most wretched sinner and being innocent to suffer for mine offences that the streames of thy pretious bloud might wash away the filthy staines of my hainous sins Alas how is the wonderfull glory oh my most sweet Lord of thy super-excellent beauty decayed how is the gracefull decency of thy amiable feature diminished And how much is the delightfull comelinesse of thy most sacred body disgraced Oh let mine eyes send forth a sea of teares and let my perplexed heart breake into pieces with exceeding sorrow to see my beloued Sauiour stained with his owne blood and leopard-like bespotted with deformitie who did farre excell all the sonnes of men with his glorious beauty Now thou seest oh my soule how the snow-white skin of the bodie of thy Sauiour is changed into a bloody tincture Thou maist see and sigh when thou seest how his tender flesh is made black and blew with the cruel blowes which cruell tormentors inflicted vpon him whose stony hearts had no sense of his grieuous paines when they saw with their eyes and yet alas they would not pitty his wofull case how the bloud ran out of his veines as water floweth out of a fountaine Mourne and lament oh my soule send forth deepe groanes and sorrowfull sighes at so pittifull a sight For now thou canst not say My beloued is white and ruddy Cant. 1.14 as sometime thou mightest But rather say my beloued is blacke and blew his pretious bloud gushing out of his veines and his tender flesh mangled with grieuous wounds Who is so cruelly minded and so stony-harted which cannot be moued to shed plentifull teares when he vieweth my sweet Sauior Iesus so sauagely abused without any pitty and so spitefully taunted and maliciously tormented without any mercy Now when those cursed Tormentors had almost tired their hands but yet not tamed the crueltie of their hearts they cloathe him with a vesture of purple colour set a crowne of sharpe thorns on his head and put a Reed for a Scepter into his hands calling him King in derision vvith their blasphemous mouthes whom they accounted more base then the meanest abiect in al the world Mat. 27.2 Is it possible for thee my sorrowfull soule to keepe backe the tide of thy streaming teares when thou dost meditate in thy perplexed minde and as it were view within thy secret thoghts how cruelly thy harmelesse Sauiour was tortured by those bloody tormentors how spitefully he was tanted and shamefully mocked by those blasphemous wretches There was no man oh my sweet Iesu that did afford thee so much as a signe of pitty in thy greatest paines thou mightest not haue a Chirurgion to stanch thy bleeding wounds no man sought to ease thy smart nor to bathe thy scourged body no man offered thee a cup of water to refresh thy fainting spirits Oh let shewers of teares trickle downe my cheekes and let a sea of sorrow ouer-flow my heart when I enter into a serious meditation of the grieuous paines derisions and afflictions which my innocent redeemer patiently endured Oh then let mine eyes send forth a flood of teares because my mercifull louing Iesus suffered all those intollerable extremities for mee a most wretched sinner that he might pay the price of my redemption and deliuer my soule from euerlasting captiuitie Oh how should I my bountifull Iesu sound the bottomlesse profunditie of thy vnspeakeable mercy And how can I search the endles depth of mine owne wretched miserie Touch my heart oh Lord by the vertue of thy holy spirit and teach me by the sacred documents of thine vnsearchable wisdome so that the affections of my heart may be faithfully affianced and for euer affixed vnto thy immeasurable loue and my minde euermore imployed in the diuine meditation of thy holy law Instruct mee to lay vp in the store-house of my perpetuall memorie how many how great and grieuous paines thou hast endured for me What should I render vnto thee in requitall of thine immeasurable loue how should I be able to demeane my selfe thankefully vnto thee when of my selfe I am so vile a creature that I cannot thinke dutifully of thee Wherefore open mine eyes oh my sweet Iesu that I may see the inestimable riches of thy bountie Infuse thy working grace into my vnderstanding that I may know acknowledge the greatnes of thy loue and goodnesse of thy gratious benefits Graunt me such a portion of thy grace that in the highest degree of my prosperitie I may meditate on thy pouerty so that my minde may be brideled from ambitious thoughts and my actions neuer transgresse the bounds of moderate humility And when I decke my body with costly attire let me thinke of thy nakednes that it may asswage my swelling pride and induce me to abate somewhat of my superfluitie to cloathe and relieue my poore brethren in their naked necessitie And when my Table is furnished with delicate meates and my cuppe filled with delicious wine then oh my louing Sauiour let me remember thy hunger Oh let me not forget thy thirst that I may be sober in my diet and temperate in my drinke and remember to refresh poore hungry Lazarus when he lieth crying and crauing at my gate When I enioy my libertie let me thinke of thine imprisonment that I may not let mine affections runne ryot but tame their wilde motions before they breake forth into desperate actions Let not worldly pleasure haue such soueraigne dominion ouer my peaceable thoughts but that I may alwayes haue some taste of the paines which thou didst suffer for my sinnes with patience and sustaine for my transgressions with silence Lastly let me neuer dispaire of thy potent mercy though by my owne merit I finde I haue deserued nothing else but hell and damnation Now that this blessed worke of thine excellent goodnesse oh my gratious Lord may be affected in mee make a deepe impression of thy loue in my bowels and ingraue the true character of thy kindnesse on my heart so that nothing may please my taste nothing breed my delight nothing affect my desires but onely thou my King God my Sauiour and my Redeemer Kindle the fire of thy loue within my bones that my ardent zeale may neuer be quenched towards my beloued Lord Iesus who did willingly abide the curse and die on the crosse to pay my debt and to deliuer my soule out of the prison of eternall death But stay not here my soule turne thine eyes toward thine afflicted Iesus view him harmlesse and innocent and see in what scornefull habit iniurious Pilate doth present him to the bloudy-minded Iewes his body is arraied in a roabe of purple his cheekes bedewed with blood running out of the veines of his head wounded with a Crowne of sharpe thornes A ruthfull spectacle which might haue made their stony-hearts haue melted with compassionate pitty But alas vvhat can
should the crying voices of murthering Iewes haue beene to thy eares how shouldst thou haue hated their bloudie hearts detested their vnlawfull requests and loathed their malicious desires vvhen they cried out vnto thee in their furie exclaimed in their madnes Let Barrabas goe free let Barrabas goe free Crucifie crucifie Iesus Matth. 27.21 Thou knewst vvell enough that vvicked Barrabas had made an insurrection disturbed the peace and committed murther and that thou couldst finde no fault nor ferret out any offence in the life of my blessed Sauiour but that the spitefull Iewes had accused him for enuie and sought his death to satisfie their malice for indeede his vvhole life vvas a Mirrour of excellent vertues his hands were cleane from euill actions his heart vvas pure from sinfull cogitations Say thine eyes were so blinded that thou could'st not see the bright beames of his Diuinitie yet thou didst see and thy mouth did testifie that thou didst see the apparant Vertues of his innocent humanitie What did mooue thee to pronounce false iudgement to shed his innocent bloud Wert thou so fond to purchase fauour of the high Priests Didst thou so dote after the loue of the people whose mindes are more mutable then the winde altering their affections euery moment that contrarie to the sense of Law testification of thy conscience and approbation of thy owne words thou wert seduced to condemne such an innocent person Thy vvife did admonish thee that thou shouldest haue nothing to doe vvith that Righteous man who suffered many things because of him in her sleepe and therefore fore-warned thee by her fearefull dreame Matth. 27.19 But neither the Caueat of thy wife nor chastisement of thy own conscience could stay thy false iudgement but at last the enuious Iewes had what they would at thy hands and thou didst giue them thy consent to execute the extream malice of their wicked harts What hadst thou gotten if thou hadst gained the vvhole vvorld vvith lose of thy soule Wofull is the purchase which is bought at so deare a rate Before thou vvouldst vouchsafe to giue Iudgement against my harmlesse Redeemer thou diddest make a solemne protestation before the multitude that thou wouldst not be guiltie with them in the shedding of his innocent bloud thinking by vvashing thy hands with a little vvater to take away the deepe staines of thy conscience Oh how may all the world wonder at thy madnesse How may all posterities condemne thee of folly Well might a little vvater cleare the spots of thy hands but all the vvater in the Ocean could not vvash away the blots of thy soule Such prety slights may passe without contradiction amongst men but alas they cannot blinde the all-piercing eyes of the Eternall Iudge vvho knoweth the secrets of euery mans heart searcheth the reines and vnderstandeth all our thoughts It vvas horrible crueltie yea it vvas a cursed deed voyd of all common humanitie to command my Lord Iesus to be stripped out of his cloathes and to haue his naked body wounded with stripes vvhen thou sawest he could not be conuicted of any vvicked acte nor iustly reproued for any euill word and to license thy lewd Officers to gibe at him at their wils and to ieast at him like a foole at their pleasure and by aggrauating his miseries to make themselues merrie yet so popular vvas thy minde and thine affections so glewed to the humor of the people that vvhen thou sawest that those streames of his precious bloud could not extinguish the flame of their furie thou didst doome him to a most scandalous and ignominious death vvho vvas honourable aboue all the sonnes of men for his righteous life and declared to be faultlesse by thy voluntarie confession after thy strict examination Oh happy are the eyes of those which sit on the seat of iudgement which can see the deformity of thy sinne that their hearts may be replenished with integrity and their hands vvith innocencie not stained vvith the spottes of Innocent bloud Curbe thou oh Lord the furious passions of my minde and quench the flame of bloudie wrath vvhen it beginneth to be kindeled in my breast that my heart may not imagine to slay the innocent nor my hands be defiled with their bloud Keepe me that I walke not in the counsell of the vvicked vvhen they lay snares and digge pits for the destruction of any of thy deare children I know oh Lord that I am readie euery moment to vvander astray vnlesse thou direct my feete by thy holy Spirit and guide me in thy path by the light of thy word I confesse my heart is tainted with originall vices and my hands are stained vvith actuall offences all my parts are defiled yea my whole body is nothing else but a vessell full of corrupted liquor I am prone to commit all euilnesse with greedinesse But alas I finde in my selfe not so much as a motion to doe any goodnesse I am forward to persecute thee with the cruell Iewes and to giue my consent to shed thy innocent bloud vvith cursed Pilate yea I daily crucifie thee by my sinnes and pierce thy blessed side vvith mine iniquitie I caused thee to be vniustly accused and vvrongfully condemned Haue not my cursed vvords and bloudie oathes beene like sharpe speares to wound thy heart and my cruell deedes like nailes to fasten thee to the Crosse Wherefore wound thou my heart that I may not lye still snorting in the bed of carelesse securitie and continue senselesse in the lethargie of sinne Purge the drosse of my vitious heart vvith the fire of thy holy spirit and purifie my corrupted cogitatious by the bright beames of thy grace Oh let this holy fire bee still burning in my breast that it may consume the corruption of mine infectious sinne that cleaneth so fast vnto my bowels Bow downe thine eare oh my mercifull Sauiour vnto my humble petition and giue a gracious answere to my earnest supplication then I shall bee emboldened to come before thy Maiestie and to approach neere vnto thy seate of mercie Oh let my morning and euening Sacrifice of thankes-giuing my louing LORD and bountifull Iesu send vp a sweet sauour into thy nosthrils which diddest suffer thy selfe to be scorned scourged and condemned by the sentence of vvicked Pilate onely for my sake and my sinnes to set my captiue soule at libertie and vvith the effusion of thy most precious bloud to pay so deare a price for the purchase of my Redemption Graunt that the remembrance of such a worthie and more then wonderfull benefit may euermore be fresh in my memorie and laid vp as a most pretious Iewell in the safest closet of my thankfull minde And at the day of thy last iudgement and generall Assises when thou shalt come to iudge the quicke and the dead enter not into iudgement with thy seruant nor remember mine iniquities but iudge me with thine elected according to thy mercie that I may possesse the kingdome with them vvhich thou hast
vouchsafe to die for the loue of me Wherefore haue the sparks of my loue lien so long couered in the embers Or rather why are they almost extinguished Oh what seuere punishment should I take of my selfe for my monstrous ingratitude How is my tongue able to vtter one word yea one sillable of a word to excuse the coldnesse of my loue How may I blush nay how may my face be confounded with shame vvhich am so vvayward and vnwilling to suffer any little affliction for thy sake who endured so many extreame torments for my sinne I lie on feather-beds couered vvarme vvith cloathes and thou didst lie naked nailed to a woodden Crosse and that in the time of colde weather vvhen others doe vvarme themselues at a fire If my head begin to ake I lay it downe vpon a soft pillow to ease my paine lessen my griefe But thou oh my louing Lord hast not so much as a bolster of straw vvhereon thou mightest lay thy dying head pierced with sharpe thornes and bleeding vvith many wounds When I am sicke my friends about mee bestirre themselues to ease my diseased body and to reuiue my fainting spirits But alas my sweet Sauiour there vvas none about thee at the houre of thy pittifull and painefull death vvhich vvould proffer thee any kinde deede no not so much as a comfortable word They offer thee bitter vvine mixed with mirrhe and mingled with Gall. But although thy thirst was great caused by the extremitie of thy paines and immoderate effusion of thy blood yet vvhen thou hadst tasted of it thou didst refuse to drinke of their bitter potion How hard were their harts yea how dead without any feeling of common compassion that could giue vnto my sweet Sauiour no better then such a bitter Potion Such was the succour that they would afford thee at the houre of thy death This was the best Cordiall they would giue thee a little before the parting of thy breath What iust occasion hadst thou my mercifull Redeemer yea what admirable patience hadst thou that thou didst not bitterly inueigh against the bloudie Gentiles and vnbeleeuing Iewes who were so maliciously madded and bloudily minded against thee that all vvhich they sought and all which they wrought was to augment thy sorrow But whilst their hearts were inflamed with malice against thee and their hands labouring to crucifie thee thou wert so farre from accusing them for their sauadge cruelty that thou didst pray vnto thy heauenly Father that hee would remit and forgiue their iniquity saying Father pardon them because they know not what they doe Luk. 23.34 And this oh my sweet Christ vvas the first vvords vvhich thou spakest vpon thy bitter Crosse Indeede they knew thee not for their eyes were blinded that they could not see and their hearts were hardned that they could not vnderstand Heere maist thou meditate oh my soule with exceeding comfort vpon the wonderfull patience admirable mercy sweet words of thy louing Sauiour who was not so much grieued with paine of his owne afflictions as hee was earnest to pray for the remission of their sinnes Hee did not once open his mouth to make any iust Apologie for his owne innocencie nor to denounce any deserued malediction No not one bitter vvord against them for their dogged cruelty But in the extremest pangs of his bitter Passion his tender heart was moued vvith pittifull compassion towards them he opened the fountaine of his mercy that the sweet streames of his Benediction might flow vpon them Hee blessed them that cursed him hee shewed them a true token of his entire loue for their cruell hate he prayed for them as if they had been his dearest friends when indeed they were his deadly foes How should my feeble tongue like a trumpet oh my bountifull Iesu sound forth the wonderfull worthinesse of thy surmounting mercy How should mine vnable and barren hart conceiue the dignitie of thine vncomparable meeknesse How should the weake sight of my darke vnderstanding pierce into the hidden mysteries of thy gratious mildnesse vvhich surpasseth all vnderstanding How affable and ineffable is the sweetnesse of thy charitable prayer how bottomlesse is the depth of thy clemencie how vnexhaustible is the treasure of thy benignitie How large and spacious yea how infinit are the bounds of thy mercie For with what tranquility of minde with what piety and pittie of heart with what sweet milde and perswasiue words didst thou sue for their pardon vvho now were breathing out nothing else but curses against thee vvith their malicious tongues and euen now acting the extremity of their Tyrannie against thee with their bloudie hands Thou wert not discouraged by their iniuries thou wert not hardned with their reproches thou didst not rebuke them for their euill words thou didst not check them for their wicked deeds thou didst seeke to salue their soares who gaue thee deadly wounds thou diddest make intercession for their life who cruelly put thee to death thou wert full of pitty towards them whose hearts were empty of all compassion towards thee Oh with what wonderfull mildnes of mind with what great deuotion of spirit in what abundance of loue didst thou cry Father forgiue them Oh wonderfull worke of thy worthy mercy oh rare and memorable example of exceeding pitty oh perfect patterne of excellent charity oh let me poore wretched sinner taste the sweetnes of this hony reuiue my dying heart with this cordiall compassion relieue my sicke soule with this comfortable confection Cry out so for me my sweet Lord and kinde Mediator commend my wofull case and pleade my cause vnto thy Father saying Father forgiue him For in truth I know not what I do loue of the world hath blinded mine eyes desire of carnall pleasures is rooted in my heart and all manner of wanton vanities are rife in my minde I runne headlong in the broad way of destruction I cannot finde the narrow path which leadeth to Saluation Open mine eyes oh Lord that I may see to walke in thy wayes and direct my feet that I may tread in thy pathes Teach mee to follow the patterne of thy excellent patience so that I may not wish well onely to my dearest friends which dearely loue mee but also pray for my cruell enemies who deadly hate mee But alas how soone am I displeased how long is it before I will forgiue if I be once offended I am prone with enuious Cain to stain my hands with horrible murder I long for a day with rough Esau wherein I may slay my innocent brother I oftentimes fall out with my friend for a crosse word so that oftentimes in requitall I seeke to doe him a mischieuous deed I thinke my selfe the worse when I see him Oh how doe I disdaine to speake vnto him Teach mee to learne this hard lesson of patience purge the seed of malice out of my mind mellow the ground of my heart vvith the deaw of thy graces that it may not onely be
so separate the vnderstanding from the loue of the world nothing doth so fortifie the minde against temptations The profitable fruits of deuout meditation nothing doth so stirre vp man and further him to euery good worke and labour as the Grace and benefit of diuine meditation and heauenly contemplation In what manner a man ought to pray deuoutly MOTIVE VIII HAue mercy vpon mee oh God because I offend there most where I ought to amend my sinnes For while I pray often in the place of prayer I doe not marke what I say I pray truly with the mouth but my minde wandering abroad I am depriued of the fruit of prayer With my body I am within but with my heart I am without And therefore I loose that I say For it profiteth little to sing or pray with the voyce onely without the deuotion of the hart Therefore it is great foolishnesse yea rather great madnesse vvhen wee doe presume to speake with the Lord of Maiestie in prayer It is presumption to pray without hearty and true deuotion and being without vnderstanding doe turne our minde from him and turne our heart I know not to what fooleries and toyes It is also great madnesse and grieuously to be punished when most vile and base dust doth disdaine to heare the Creatour of the whole world speaking to it But it is an vnspeakeable grace of the Diuine goodnesse which doth daily behold vs vnhappy vvretches turning away our eares hardning our hearts and neuerthelesse cryeth out to vs saying Returne yee Transgressors vvith your heart attend and see because I am God God speaketh to me in a Psalme neither yet when I say a Psalme doe I consider whose Psalme it is Wherefore I doe great iniurie to God when I pray to him to heare my prayer which I doe not heare my selfe who doe vtter the same I intreat him that he attend to mee The prayer of the wicked is turned into abhomination but I neither attend to my selfe nor to him but that which is farre worse by thinking filthy and vnprofitable things within my heart I bring an horrible stinke before his sight Of the instabilitie and wandering of the heart MOTIVE IX The heart of man is tossed to and fro in the stream of euill cogitations NOthing is more vnconstant instable and fugitiue in mee then my heart the which so often as it leaueth me floweth and fleeteth away by euill cogitations so often it offendeth God My heart great heart wandering vnstable while it is led by his owne will cannot remaine constant in it selfe but being more moueable then any moueable thing is distracted and drawne through infinite things and runneth vp downe hither and thither through innumerable matters And vvhile it seeketh rest and content by diuers things it cannot finde the same but continueth in the labour and turmoyle of miserie voyd of rest and contentment and seeketh here and there where it may rest and findeth nothing which may suffice it vntill it doth returne to him backe againe who gaue it It is ledde from cogitation to cogitation and it is altered and changed by diuers imployments and affections that at least it may be filled with varietie and change of those things with whose qualitie it cannot any way possibly be satisfied So the heart is troubled with it's owne illusions and fantasies The heart reuolting from God can finde no rest vntill it returne to God All that we haue is Gods owne yet hee saith giue mee thy heart the Diuine grace being remoued and substracted And when it is returned to it selfe and discusseth and examineth that vvhich it thought it findeth nothing because it was not a worke but an vnsauoury and vnseasonable thought which compoundeth and frameth many things of little or nothing at all And lastly imagination deceiueth it which the illusion of the Deuill formeth and shapeth God commaundeth me that I giue him my heart and because I am not obedient and subiect to God commanding I am rebellious and contrary to my selfe Whereby I cannot be brought in subiection to my selfe vntill I shall be subiect to him and serue my selfe with an euill will which would not serue him with a good will Therefore my heart plotteth endeauoureth and goeth about more things in one moment then all men are able to performe in a yeere I am not vnited with God and therefore I am diuided in my selfe I cannot be truly vnited with him but by loue neither be subiect to him but by humility neither can I be truly humble but by truth It is expedient therefore that I examine my selfe in Truth and know how vile how fraile how vnconstant and slipperie I am Afterwards when I shal know all my wants and miseries it is needfull that I cleaue vnto him by whom I am and without whom I am nothing and can doe nothing and because I haue departed from the Lord by sinning I cannot returne vnto him but by true confession Therefore I must now confesse in truth and sinceritie because I haue neuer confessed my sinnes in that measure and manner in which I haue sinned neither haue I remembred all eyther because of the antiquitie or multitude of them But if I haue confessed them I haue not sincerely confessed them but haue flattered the flesh in my confession and haue dealt falsely in casting vp the sum of my great and grieuous transgressions And it is a cursed dissimulation to make but a slight and counterfeit confession of our rebellions towards GOD and of our injurious and vncharitable actions towards men and onely to pare the outside of sinne away and as it were to wash our hands with a little water not to pluck vp sinne by the rootes that it may neuer afterwards grow vp in our hearts Our Confession must bee true and sincere For confession is not profitable but in the Truth and puritie of the heart that there may be three which may beare vs witnesse in Heauen The Father and the Sonne and the holy Ghost And as men haue beene beholders of our manifolde transgressions so let vs make them witnesses of our humble repentance and hartie contrition And although we must and ought to acknowledge GOD alone to bee All-sufficient to graunt vs free pardon and absolution yet wee should not refuse to shew forth manifest testimonies to men of our true and sincere Humiliation To vvhich the Apostle Saint Iames doth counsell and perswade vs saying Confesse your sinnes one to another For it is very conuenient that vvee vvhich haue beene stubborne and rebellious by sinning against GOD should be humble also towards men whom vve haue offended eyther by the euill example of our wicked life or else by our wrongfull dealing and false deeds For it is most healthfull to the soule that a man repent in heart and acknowledge his fault with his mouth so that God which is present in Mercy and Grace may pricke his heart by compunction and bitter repentance
a couetous and greedy Miser he heapeth vp to himselfe Ignominie and foule reproach by his odious fraud and dissimulation and through his malitious subtilty kindleth the wrath of God against him and daily addeth more fewell to augment the flame This man was conceiued bred and borne in sinne and so being nurtured and nusled in sinne is become a friend of iniquitie the childe of death the vessell of wrath exposed to contumelious reproach and finall destruction Who although hee be so corrupted with wicked manners depraued with vile conditions and depriued of all commendable vertues yet hee vttereth forth the sacred Iustice of God with his dissembling words and taketh his holy couenant in his prophaned mouth He hateth discipline and scorneth correction he dishonoureth his soueraigne Lord and casteth his commaundements contemptuously behinde his backe When hee spieth a Thiefe hee entereth a league of societie and runneth to mischiefe with him he shareth and hath his portion with filthy and vncleane Adulterers he is vvholy delighted vvith their scandalous amitie he alwaies frequenteth their damnable societie Hee forgetteth many false accusations and criminall obiections against the sonne of his owne and onely mother hee also treasureth wrath vpon thee against the day of wrath and vengeance to worke and contriue thy wofull and eternall perdition he would rob and quite depriue thee of thy rich and royall inheritance and would banish thee for euer from thy heauenly and most happy Country to dwell in a land of perpetuall darknesse full of euerlasting woes and lamentations Yet thou art so blinded vvith selfe-conceited folly and so besotted with thy doting affections that thou wilt not lift vp so much as thy little finger to reuenge so great so notorious and grieuous an iniurie but are content to dissemble thy hurts and to put vp all his vvrongs hee hath done vnto thee to hold thy tongue and so to let them passe away in silence neither doest thou speake an vnkinde or froward word nor shew him a frowning or soure looke but thou smilest vpon him vvith a ioyfull face When he flattereth sootheth thee in thy dangerous follies thou doest sport play dally and solace thy selfe with a scornefull mocker thou knowest not that it is a deriding Ismael which sporteth and playeth with thee This is no Childish sport acted in simplicitie and qualified vvith harmelesse innocency but the beginning of it is bloody persecution and the end of it euerlasting death and damnation hee hath tumbled thee downe headlong into the deepe pit which hee digged and made for thy eternall destruction now thou art become an effeminate Coward and hast lost the vigor of thy manly forces now thou being a wretched Captiue pressed downe with the grieuous yoke of most miserable and slauish bondage art basely deiected trampled and trod vpon vnder his feet O wretched wofull and miserable man who shall deliuer rescue and redeeme thee from the heauy band and bondage of this ignominious and opprobrious Nick-name Let God arise and let that armed man fall downe to the ground If God be on our side wee need not care who be against vs. let him fall flat on the ground let that direfull foe and bloody Tyrant be beaten into pieces as small as the dust to be scattered abroad with the violence of the stormy windes A proud contemner of God and all that are good a worshipper of himselfe a friend of the world a seruant of the deuill What thinkest thou What is thy opinon How inclineth thy minde and affection If Reason be thy Pilot to direct the course of thy opinion and Wisedome the Master to stirre the helme of thy Vnderstanding thou wilt say with mee Hee hath committed most vile and horrible treason against the highest Maiestie hee is guiltie of death let him be crucified and let him suffer as he hath well deserued the extreame rigour of most bitter and painefull Torments of the flesh Do not therefore play the Hypocrite and maske thy counterfeiting affections vvith the vizard of dissimulation deferre not his execution from day to day by a fond repriuall spare him not for foolish pitty but speedily boldly instantly crucifie that sinfull and guilty Traytor But on the Crosse of Christ by whose death wee are restored and raised to life made coheyres with him of his glorious Kingdome and of euerlasting Saluation to whom if thou shalt cry vvith a sorrowfull compunction of a groaning heart and vvith the deepe sighes of a grieued and penitent minde then thy crucified Christ will heare thee speedily answering thee kindly To day thou shalt be with me in Paradise Oh wonderfull pitty of Christ a most louing Sauiour oh vndeserued nay vnexpected Saluation of a great and grieuous Sinner So bountifull so gracefull and so delightfull is the exceeding loue of God so admirable is his sweetnesse so farre beyond our opinion is his fauourable kindnesse so immeasurable is his meekenesse that his eares are alwaies open to heare the complaints of his pleople he is alwaies at leisure to receiue with kindnesse and to answere with speedinesse the humble petitions of those which in time of their distresses will faithfully call vpon him and with contrite and relenting hearts will reuerently approach neere vnto him because his mercy toward vs is without measure and his tender compassion knoweth no bounds Oh how great worthy and wonderfull is the mercy of our gratious God! Oh how vnvtterable is the powerfull alteration of the right hand of the highest Yesterday I was fast fettered in the Prison of darkenesse vnder the checke of a cruell and mercilesse Murtherer How pleasant is the freedome of sinne to day I am in the hand of a pittifull and mercifull Mediator Yesterday I was in the gate of deuouring hell on euery side affrighted with feare and afflicted with misery to day I am in the pleasant Paradise of eternall delights and pleasure totally replenished with neuer-decaying ioy endlesse delight and euerlasting felicitie But how may these Letters of admonition preuaile how may they profite vnlesse thou race out of the Booke of thy Conscience the blacke letters of thy bloody death and sinnefull debt How can these sentences affoord thee any solace procure any profit or bring any comfort when they are read and vnderstood vnlesse thou read thy selfe truly know and vnderstand perfectly Doe thy best diligence afforde thy chiefest indeauours to internall and mentall reading The true end and vse of reading bookes that thou mayest read thy selfe truely looke into thy selfe circumspectly and know thy selfe throughly Read that thou mayest loue God vnfainedly that thou mayest fight and hold out vntill the end of the battell couragiously and that thou mayest ouercome the world and euery cruell enemy victoriously so that thy toyling labour may be turned into eternall rest and quietnesse thy wofull mourning into mirth and gladnesse thy streames of teares into riuers of comfortable vvaters and that when Death hath quite put out the twinckling Lampe of