did greatly excéede mine Because firste séeing her selfe conioyned with her brother in the Kingdome and lyuing in all manner of pleasure and delights and afterwards cast by him into prysonne was thought beyonde all measure to be charged with insupportable dolour But the present hope of that which after happened made her to passe it ouer more lightly For shée béeing deliuered out of pryson became Caesar his louing and belooued Ladie But afterwards forsaken of him there are who think that for gréefe of these crossing cares her tender hartstringes did well nie break a sunder not regarding that there was a certaine touch of vnconstancie breach of loue as wel in her as in him which at both their pleasures they did forsake and take from one another and bestowe it els where as often times she plainely shewed how fitly she could doo the same But the Gods forbid that such consolation befal to my comfortlesse and afflicted soule For he was neuer yet or euer shall be besides him to whom by many desertes I haue auowed the whole terme and trauaile of my life that coulde affyrme or yet can say that I was euer his but in hart affianced onely to Panphilus and whose I wyll for euer remaine Nor let him hope whosoeuer he be that any other loue shall neuer be of such force as to driue his out of my faithful breast Besides this if she had béene at Caesar his departure left altogether comfortlesse by him there woulde be some againe who ignoraunt of the trueth would beléeue that this was very gréeuous vnto her but yet it was not so Because if she were on the one side agréeued at his departure the ioy on the other and the comfort that she receiued of her lyttle Sonne Caesarionem which she had by him and of her Kingdome restored to her againe counteruayling her gréefe nay excéeding all her former sorrowes whatsoeuer did yéelde her treble consolation This ioy hath force and strength enough to ouercome greater anguishe and more extreame cares of mind then those of them who loue but a little and that but coldly to as euen now I saide that she did But that which for the accomplishment of her greatest gréefe was annexed to the rest was that she was the wyfe of Marke Antonie whom shee had with her libydinous entisements styrred vp to ciuill nay vnciuill warres against her owne brother aspyring thereby and hoping by the victory of them to haue béene crowned Empresse of the Romane monarchy But dubble lose arising to her by this in one hower which was the deth of her slaine husband of her frustrat hope of al other womē made her as it is cōmonly thought the most vnfortūat most sorrowful Lady beyond al conceit to be confounded with the greatest cares and gréefes that might be And considering truely so high a mynde and so prowde a conceite which to be first in imagination and afterwardes in indéede sole and soueraigne Ladie and Quéene of the whole circuite of the earth by one infortunate battaile to be dashed and cast downe our sex also being naturally giuen to aspyre and domination besids the foyle of the conquered the triumph of the victor and besides this the losse also of so déere and braue a husband it cannot be otherwise apprehended but that it was a wonderful corsiue to her noble heart and an extreme torment of her dismayed soule But sodanely she found out a wholesome medicine which did spéedely helpe and heale this mortall mallady and that was a straung kinde of death Which although for the tyme it was very cruell and sharpe was not for all that in execution any long time a dooing Because in one little hower two venomous vipers may at the pappes of a yoūg and tender woman sucke out both blood and life as they did out of miserable Cleopatras brest O how many times would I haue doon the like although for a lesser occasion according to the opinion of many if I had béene peremtorilie forsaken or if for feare also of ensuing infamie thereof I hadde not withdrawen my selfe With this and the aforesayd Ladies the execellencie of Cyrus killed of Tomaris and drowned in a boll of his owne blood the fier and water of Craesus Cyrus Craesus Persians Pyrrhus Darius Iugurtha Dionisius Agamemnon the ritch Kindomes of the Persians the magnificency of Pyrrhus the power of Darius the crueltie of Iugurtha the tirannie of Dionisius the highnesse of Agamemnon and the sodaine chaunges of many other more occured to my thoughtes All which were stinged with these gréefes and spurned at the féete of scornefull fortune as the foresayd women or else altogeather comfortlesse left of to worse mishappes Who also with sodaine argumentes of their better fare were aided nor remaining any longe time in them did not féele the greatnesse and gréefe of them so entirely as I doo Company as it is aboue said doth lessen the greefe Theistes Tereus Whilest I went recounting the auncient sorrowes in this sorte as you haue heard and séeking in my minde to finde out some teares and sorrowes in most respectes like vnto mine owne because hauing company I might not so greatly lament and might suffer my gréefe with more patience Those of Theistes and of Tereus bothe which were the miserable Sepultures of their owne Sons were obiected to my memorie And I maruel what vnnaturall and forced patience fearing their inward bitinges and what pittilesse restrainte did moderate those sauage Sires from launching theyr sides and with slicing kniues to make way for their Sonnes strugling in theyr paternall bowels and striuing to come foorth abominating that wretched place into which they were so rauenously gulfed But these also burst out with that they could choaked at once theyr hatred and gréefe togeather and so tooke in a manner a certaine comforte in theyr harmes perceiuing that without faulte they were accounted miserable men but of theyr people that which happened not to mée For I haue compassion borne me of that which did neuer gréeue mee and dare not discouer that whych dooth most of all afflicte me which thing if I durst doo I doubt not but as others in my miserable case haue found out some remedie for theyr paynes Lycurgus so might I perhappes finde out some ease and helpe as well as they The pittifull teares of Licurgus and of his house iustly powred foorth for dead Archemorous killed of the Serpent come also sometimes to my minde and accompanied with the continuall sighes of sorrowful Atalanta mother of Parthenopaeus killed in the Thebane Campes Atalanta which came so properly and so néerely to mée with theyr effectes that I could scarce conceyue any greater then them in my minde If had not prooued them my selfe I say that they were full of such great sorrowe that they could not be more But euery one of them are with so high glory eternished that they might bée estéemed in a manner merry accidents then mornefull
mée the chéefest thinge in déede Remayning therefore continually in my chamber and as often as any body came into the same so often dyd I beléeue that they were come to bring mée tydinges that hee was comming or else to tell mée that hee was alreadie arriued I neuer heard any talke in any publyque and pryuate place but with open and attentiue eares I noted it well thinking that eyther they did or else should speake of his returne And sitting in my chamber I rose I thinke a thousand times out of my place to runne to the windowe as though I had béene busied about something else looking from thence a farre of and beneath also at the doore driuen on by the suggestion of a foolishe conceite and fonde beléefe of his béeing néere I sayd Is it possible Fiammetta that Panphilus being now returned dooth come to sée thée And afterwardes finding my mind illuded confounded with my selfe I went to my place againe And saying that at his returne hee should bring certaine thinges to my hushande I did often times aske and caused many to enquier if he was arriued or when his fréendes in these partes did looke for him But receiuing no ioyful aunswer of my diligent and carefull enquiries but onely such an one as of him that should neuer come any more as afterwardes indéede he did not caused mee to liue in a most sorrowfull and solitarie plight Wherefore wrapped most pittifull Ladies in these cares as you haue heard I came not onely to the greatly desired and with infinite payne expected terme but I passed it also many daies after in great and gréeuous woes And vncertaine with my selfe whether I should blame him or not my hope beganne by little and little to relent Wherfore I partly left of my former and pleasant imaginations into the which giuing perhappes my mind to great a scope I had entred to farre And new thoughtes nowe the olde being gonne beganne to tosse and turmoyle my soule a freshe and holding my minde in diuers doubtes and perplexities to know what was the occasion of his tariaunce longer then he promised I beganne to excogitate many things carefully with my selfe They feele incredible passioÌ„s who after the and of their promised time se not the returne of their beâ—ooued And before many other doubts that were obiected to my minde I found many thinges so ready in hys excuse and many more then he him selfe if he had bene here could haue perhappes alleadged Sometimes I sayd Oh Fiammetta what reason dooth make thée thinke that thy Panphilus dooth stay without returning to thée but because he cannot diuers sodaine chaunces and vnexspected affayres doo many times hinder forward men in their determinations and doo quite dissolue their disseignmentes Nor is it possible to prescribe so precise a time to future thinges as many vnwisely beléeue And who dooth doubt also that present néere auncient and dutifull pietie dooth not binde more then that which is absent straung new and but méere volentrarie I know it very certaine that he looueth me most of al and dooth now thinke of my sorrowful life and hath no small compassion of my paines And pricked on by force of loue is many times in hand and most willing to set forwardes and to come vnto me But the olde doterd his iniurious father with his teares perhappes and prayers hath somewhat more prolonged his appointed time and opposing his commaundementes to his forwarde will hath retayned him still there Wherefore as soone as fit oportunitie is aunswerable to his desirous minde hee will come to me againe But after these spéeches and fréendly excuses my thronging thoughts did driue me on farther to imagine more straung vnluckie and more gréeuous occurrauntes Sometimes I sayd Who can tell if he more wilfull then his due looue required to sée me againe and too precise to come iust at the ende of his appointed moneth laying a side the great pittie of hys aged father and neglecting all other busines hath embarqued him selfe in some slender vessell not attending the calmes of the tempestuous waues and crediting to much deceitfull and lying Mariners who for their gaine are too aduenturous and desperate of their owne liues and too prodigall of those of their passengers and hauing committed him selfe to the rage of the mercilesse windes and surging waues of the daungerous Seas is perhappes drowned and perished in them Vnfortunate Leander by no other occasion and lamentable meanes then these was taken from hys happelesse Heroe Againe who knoweth if constrained by hys froward fates and fortune he is throwen vpon some vnhabitable and desert rocke and escaping daunger and death by water in exchaung of that hath gotten a worse by famine or rauening foules or else lefte vppon any rocke by forgetfulnesse as Achimenedes was dooth in vayne attend that some shold come or by chaunce touch by to fetch him from thence For who is ignoraunt how full of deceytes the lawlesse seas are For it may be also that he is taken by enemies or with giues by wicked Pyrattes bound fast and kept in prison All which perrilles as they are common so doo we daily sée them come to passe But on the other side afterwardes it came to my minde that his iourney was more safe by land yet I did imagine likewyse of a thousand sinistrous chaunches that might hinder and stay him aswell that way Wherfore iudging that he might when such inopinate and vnluckie hazardes of fortune came sodainely and soonest obiected to my minde finde the more iust and better excuse as he did alleadge the greater and worser daungers some times I sayd The effect of the Sun in the spring time Beholde the Sunne whotter then it was wont to be dooth dissolue the huge hilles of Snowe congealed in the middle region of the Ayre whereupon with furious and flowinge streame they came powring downe into the plaines of the which he hath not a fewe to passe ouer Wherefore if nowe with more audatious rashnesse theÌ„ aduised reason he hath aduentured to passe ouer them with his horse is fallen into any of them and stifled there amongst them hath miserablie lost his lyfe why how can he then come Floodes haue not learned of late neyther is it a straunge thing to them with these iniuries to molest trauaylers and cruellie to swallowe vp vnawares those that passe ouer them But if he hath happily escaped these vnhappy daungers he may be perchaunce fallen into the handes of some pittilesse théeues and despoyled of all that he hath is perforce kept and without hope of redemption stayed of them Or else paraduenture may be ouertaken by some maladie in the way where now he abydeth for the recouerie of hys health and after he is well agayne will without fayle come iyofully to vs. Whyle these carefull imaginatyons occupyed thus my perplexed minde a lyttle colde sweate did ouerrunne all my bodie and I was so greatly afrayde of the euent of these vncertaine dangers and
that thou treadest on Whose sundry kinds of delightfull seruices and swéete pleasures shall so by little and little driue him out of thy remembraunce as hee hath for loue of his new Gentlewoman banished thee perhaps out of his memory Iupiter laugheth at these promised faithes and solemne oathes whē they are broken And whosoeuer doth vse one but according as he is vsed himselfe what canne the worlde speake or thinke of any more then the deserts of such an one did require To kéepe faith with one that hath broken hys is reputed now adaies but méere mockerye and to requite deceits with deceits is estéemed no small poynt of wisedome Medea forsaken of Iason entertayned Egeus And Ariadne forsaken of Theseus got Bacchus for her Husband and so were their mournings turned into myrth Temperate therefore thy gréefes suffer thy paines patiently because thou hast not any occasion to be sorrowful more for another then to be pittifull towards thy selfe And whensoeuer thou wilt thou shalt finde oportunitie enough to make thē cease considering that the same and greater gréefes then thyne were sometimes sustained and passed away by others greater and more noble personages then thy selfe For Deianira was forgottē of Hercules for Iole and Phillis of Demophoon and Penelope of Vlisses for Circe And all their tormēts and passions were greater then thine by how much the heate of their loue was greater and more feruent then thine And so much the more if their diuine essence immortall powers and the hautie condition of those notable men and Women are well considered and yet they suffered them In these disgraces therfore thou art not alone nor the first And those aduersities in the which patients haue company Greese is lesse hurtfull when one hath company in it are not so gréeuous and painefull to them as thou thy selfe dooest say Wherefore bee merry againe and expell these vaine cares admonishing thée to haue before thine eyes a continuall doubt and feare of thy déere Husband and of his iust anger and yet vnconceiued iealosie to whose eares if perhappes these follies as néedes they must at laste shoulde come admitte as thou saist that he could giue thée no other nor no lesse punishment then death the very same for as much as one can die but once ought euerye one when his howre is come and when he can to take it in the best sorte and order he may And thinke that if that kind of death which in thy rage angrye moode thou dooest so quickly so wickedly desire should followe and happen vnto thée with what greate infamy and euerlasting shame should thy liuing memorye thy déere honour thy good name and thine honestye suruiue and remaine for euer after blotted and ignomiously obscured Worldly thinges shoulde bee vsed not as troublesome substaunces but as transitory shaddowes Wherefore from henceforce let neither thy selfe nor any other put any affiaunce in them whether they haue a prosperous or preposterous issue nor yet throwne downe in aduersitie let not any of the otherside dispayre of the best Clotho mingleth these and those things together and forbiddeth that Fortune bée stable and constant and chaungeth euery fate None had euer the Goddes so fauourable to their willes that they might presentlye binde them vnto them or coulde at any time haue them tyed to their affections For they prouoked by the guilt of our sins turne our affaires topsye turuy and Fortune againe helpeth those that be valiant couragious and stoute minded reiecting those that are pusillanimous fearefull doubtfull in their enterprises And now it is time to prooue if vertue haue any place in thée Admitte that at al times it may neuer be remooued though oppressed with darke clowdes of aduersities and darkned with blacke tempests of mis-fortune it is oftentimes choaked and lyeth secrete and hydden Hope also hath this property annexed to it that it is not a guide to afflictions nor sheweth any way to gréefe or sorrow Wherefore hee that may hope in anye thing let him dispayre of nothing Wee are tossed with the fluctuant waues of our destinies and those thinges beléeue me that they prepare for vs cannot with so light care with so small regarde or with so soone labour bee chaunged The greater part almost of that which we mortall generation eyther doo or suffer commeth from the heauens aboue Lachisis dooth kéepe a decréed Lawe to her Distaffe and doth draw forth euery thing by a limitted way The firste day she giueth thée is the last neyther is it lawful to wrest determined things and wrought aboue with the influences of the Planets to an other course It hath hurt many to be afraid of an inmoouable order and many also in not fearing the same Because while these are a fearing their owne destinies the very same are already befallen to thē vnawares Leaue therefore thy gréefes and sorrowes which voluntarilie thou hast procured and liue ioyfully putting thy hope in the Gods and endeuour to doo well because it hath often times come to passe that when one doth think himselfe furdest from felicitie then with an inopinate steppe he is suddainly entred into it Many Shippes securely sayling thorow the déepe and wide Seas haue béene offentimes cast away in the mouth of the wyshed Hauen And some againe dispayring altogether of succour haue in the selfe same day and daunger yea suddainly arriued to the desired ende of their long voyage And I haue séene many trées smittē with Iupiters scorching lightnings and in fewe dayes after again couered ouer with gréene leaues and loaden with goodly fruite And some againe cherished with great care by some secrete and suddaine accident withered quite away Fickle Fortune doth yéelde sundry effects for as she hath béen the instrument of thy long gréefe so if by hope thou doost nourish thy life shee wyll likewise minister to thée manie occasions wholsome meanes of double ioy againe And nowe she helde her peace But as many times as she perceiued me distracted into these vnwonted and extreamest passions so did the sage Nurce vse these spéeches towardes mee thinking with her selfe to driue these irremoouable gréefes and obstinate anguish out of my minde reserued onely for the full consumation of my death But none or fewe of her graue counselles did touch my troubled mind with effect and the greatest part of them spent in vaine vanished away in the ayre And my sorrowfull soule did euery day more sensibly féele more gréene and gréeuous wounds Wherfore lying many times vpright vpon my rich bedde with my face couered betwéene mine armes I imagined diuers great matters and strange things in my troubled minde And now I will begin pittifull Ladies to tell of most cruell thinges and not credible almost to be hatched in the breast of a simple Woman They that loue vnfortunatly doo often times think to kil them selues if the sequell of these or greater then these were not séene afterwards to come to passe My harte béeing therefore
perceiuing her couert and malitious guyles did intend to arme my yéelding hart and féeble breast with weapons if I hadde béene so wyse to haue taken and vsed them for my defence because I might come forewarned and not vnarmed to the battayle in the which I should miserablye haue fallen Wherefore with a manifest vision in my dreames the verie night before the day that dismall day I saie did come which was the sorrowfull beginning of my endles paynes and losse of libertie they did cléerely admonish me of future accidents in this sort Mée thought lying in a faire broade bedde with euerie part of my bodie resolued into deepe sléepe Dreames somtimes foretell things to come I sawe the fayrest and brightest day that might be and my selfe I knowe not how more iocant and merrie then euer I had béene before And ioying all alone in this kind of mirth I did imagine that I sat in a swéete Medowe vpon the gréene grasse and amongst manie golden and pleasant flowres defended from the heate of the Sunne and frō his parching beames with manie coole shadowes of diuers Trées newly apparelled with thicke and gréene leaues And hauing gathered manie flowres in the same wherewith all that place was most brauelie depainted with my lyllie white handes I did seperate one from another as they lay confused and mingled in my lappe and with the finest that I coulde picke out I made a fayre and little Garlande wherewith I did adorne my statelie head Beautified thus and rysing vp as Proserpina did when Pluto didde rauishe her from her mother I went singing vp and downe in this pleasant and trym Medowe reioysing at the entrance of merrie Springtide And afterwards féeling my selfe somewhat wearie I layde mée downe amongst the thickest and freshest grasse to reste my selfe a little But like as that little hydden Viper did pricke Euridices tender foote euen so a lurking and créeping Serpent did likewyse appeare to my sight as I lay along vpon the soft and thicke grasse the which me thought did wyth her cruell tongue sting me vnder the left pappe which venimous byting at the first entrance of her sharpe téeth dydde séeme to burne me like a scalding and fierie flame And then béeing almost assured and past feare of the worst mee thought I put the colde Serpent into my burning bosome imagyning that wyth the benefit of her colde skynne she shoulde a little ease me and be more fauourable vnto me for this gentle déede But emboldened rather by the same and nowe become more fierce then before to the foresayd sting she reioyned her cruell mouth and hauing after a good while sucked a great quantitie of my vitall blood me thought that meerely going out from my wounded bosome though I did stryue to the contrarie she went also away wyth my fainting soule At the departing of which the golden day obscured and like a shadow driuen by the Sunne comming behind me did couer me all ouer after which followed a foggy mistye darknes accompanied with multitudes of black thick clowdes which hanging vpon it did séeme to bee drawne after and like a confused and difformed Chaos to follow And not long after as a little white stone cast into a déepe and cléere water doth by little and little vanish away from the sighte of them that doo beholde it euen so was the brightnes of thys Sunne shyne day taken away from my dimmed sight Then might I perceiue the Heauens to bee ouercome with darknes and the gladsome Sun retyred backe and obscure night approching made me call to mind that this suddaine alteration was not vnlike vnto that which happened to the Grecians when the Sunne did hide his face Atreus hys fault was that hee made the Father which was his brother to eate hys owne Son wherupon the Sun retired backe againe because it would not see so wicked a messe and table because he woulde not for shame behold the enormitie of Atreus his foule fault The fearefull lightnings péecemeale glaunced vp and down in the ayre and cracking thunders made the earth but mée most of all afraide And the wound which vntill this time had but onely stunge mée me thought by reason of the late byting remaining now full of viperous venome ouerranne and occupyed all my bodie with most filthie and lothsome swellings no secrets of phisicke béeing able to cure the same Whereuppon féeling my selfe at the first without any spirite and afterwardes the force of the poyson by more subtill entraunces serching euerie vaine of my hart I tumbled and tossed my selfe vp and downe the gréene grasse expecting alwayes when death would assaile mee And nowe the finall howre to my thinking béeing come terrified also with the horror of the time and with the extreame gréefe of my infected hart attending the mortall stroke of death made mee to shryke and start on a suddaine in such sort that it caused my deadly sléeping bodie to shake againe and so brake mee out of that horrible and gastlie dreame After the which as it was very suddaine and not a little afraide also of those things which me thought I hadde séene with my right hand I made great spéede to my bytten left side séeking that presently there which was afterwards prepared for me in time to come But yet when I found no wound nor anie signe thereof passing merrie againe and carelesse I began to deride and laughe at the foolishnesse of dreames and so accounted the labour of the Goddes héerein but vaine But wretch that I am how iustly though then I scorned them haue I afterwardes to my greate gréefe of minde beléeued and found them most true and planted them without anie fruite béeing no lesse gréeued at the Gods who declare their secrets to vncapable minds with so greate obscuritie the which no sooner shewed but incontinently they happen Béeing therefore thorowlie awaked I lifted vppe my head and by a little creuisse in the dore did sée Titan forsake Auroras Chamber and enter into mine Wherefore casting all such fond conceits aside I rose vp That was a high and festiuall day almost to all the world in the which euerie one to honor the solemnitie of it attyred themselues with their best and brauest robes wherefore apparrelling my selfe moste curiously with garments woouen with shyning Golde and with cunning and skilfull hande setting euerie thing in euery part about me in the finest order adorned like to the fayrest of those thrée Goddesses which Paris sawe in the Valies of Ida I prepared my selfe to goe to this solemne and high feast And while I was beholding my selfe on euerie side not otherwise then the Pecock doth her gay Feathers and imagining as well to please others as my selfe one of my flowres broken from my crowne by the Curtaine of the bedde or els perhappes plucked from my heade by some celestiall inuisible hande fell from my head to the ground But I taking no regarde of the secrete operations of the Goddes and
vnto me who with this kynd of pleasing passion neuer ouercome of any before though attempted of many and at the last conquered of one haue burned and kept as yet I doo more sensibly these new flames that haue taken more hold of mee then euer they did of anie other who before haue assayed the like But leauing aside many thoughts which with diuers accidents that morning turmoyled my troubled mind and besides these which nowe I haue told I say that béeing incended with a newe furie with my captiuated and bonde soule I returned againe thither from whence not long since I had brought it frée Where afterwardes that I was nowe come into my Chamber all alone kindled with variety of burning desires surcharged with new thoughts and pricked with a thousand stinging cares terminating euerie ende of them in the imagined apprehension of my yong Gentleman I thought that if I coulde not weane my selfe from this newe loue at the least in my secret and sorrowfull breast wisely to haue nourished and gouerned the same and warilie to haue brought it to some good effect Which things howe difficult they are to performe none can tell vnlesse they proue them vndoubtedlie beléeuing that they doo no lesse harme then loue it selfe Wherefore confirmed as it were in this opinion I saide thus to my selfe Alas thou art in loue poore soule and yet thou doost not know with whom What kinds of cruell thoughts and howe many carefull cogitations were engendred of this loue it shoulde be too tedious for you daintie Ladies to heare and to gréeuous for me to tell But yet though forcing my selfe thereunto to obtayne the more pittie at your handes and some comfort thereby I meane to vnfolde some of them vnto you I say therefore that carelesse of all other thinges to spende the time in thinking of my beloued and amiable yong Gentlemanne was only most deare and pleasant vnto me And imagining with my selfe that perseuering in this that which I did intend to conceale might perhaps haue easily béene presumed I oftentimes found fault with my selfe for it But what did it helpe My owne reprehensions gaue place to my desires and like words of light worth passed away with the ayre I chiefely desired manie daies together to knowe what my beloued youth was to the vnderstandinge of which thing newe thoughts made me an open way by meanes of which most warily and priuilie I knewe it and whereof I remained not a little contented My goodly ornaments likewyse which as one that little néede them were not before thys time so much in request with me began now to be greatlie liked of me thinking that béeing adorned with thē I myght please the more Wherefore I estéemed nowe more of gorgious apparrell gold pearles and other precious stones and gemmes then euer I did before And I who vntil this time had frequented the holy Temples Feastes Sea banks and pleasant Gardens without any further intent or desire thē to kéepe other Gentlewomen and Ladyes company began altered now in mind for new purposes to resorte more often to the foresaid places thinking that there I might with pleasure not onely beholde but with delight and desire bee séene againe But the great affiaunce truely which I was wont to haue in my beautie forsooke me nowe quite wherefore I neuer went out of my Chamber without the infallible counsell of my trustie Glasse And my cunning handes I know not by what curious instructor newly taught finding euerie day more braue and rare ornaments conioyning artificiall with naturall beautie did make mee like Venus starre shine amongst other Ladyes The great honours moreouer curtesies and obeisance which other Ladyes and Gentlewomen of theyr méere good wyls and dueties did vnto me although indéede they were incident to my nobilitye I nowe began to accept and expect as seruices duely worthily belonging to my high estate thinking that I shoulde please my louer most of all when by these meanes he didde perceiue that I was of noble byrth and lynage And that cōmon couetousnes which is naturally borne and ingraffed in all Women did worke in mee eschewing the same no other effects then to estéeme of all my riches land treasure as if they had not béene mine owne wherby I became not onelie liberall but féeling also a certaine séemelie boldnes to encrease in me made me deuoide of all womanlie and suspicious feare accounting but one thing only déerer to me now then before And besides all this my eyes which vntill this time had béen but simple and vnexpert in amorous regards chaunged their former fashions and grewe meruailous skilfull in performing their parts And I discouered moreouer in me diuers other mutations all which by one and one I care not to set downe because first it would bée too long a labour and secondlie because I beléeue that you faire Ladyes enamored perhaps like my selfe are not ignorant how great and manie those are which accompany louers in like causes The yong Gentleman was most warie and wise as manie times by experience I was sufficiently thereof acertayned Hee came but seldome times and that in moste honest and séemely sort where I was and hauing as it séemed purposed the selfe same thing that I hadde doone which was to conceale altogether these amorous flames did yet with many priuie and stealing lookes not a fewe times pittifully beholde me He did therfore make those kindled flames in me more feruent and liuelie and reuiued those againe yf anie they were that were spent and quite consumed in me But the beginning of all this loue was not so ioyfull and happy but the sequell and ende of it was more sorrowfull and vnfortunate at what time I remained depriued of his sight because these eyes béeing denyed their wished ioy did minister a gréeuous occasion to my poore harte of gréefe whereuppon my sighes both in quantitie and quallitie were greatly augmented And hote desire occupying almost euery least sence of myne did make me liue as one besides my selfe Diuers accidents of loue especially in a weake mind and as if I had not béene there where I was made many that sawe me to wonder often times at me attributing afterwardes infinite and feyned occasions taught mee onely of loue to such strange and vncouth accidents And besides all thys taking from mee manie times my swéete reste in the night time and appetite in the day did driue me sometimes to certayne suddaine and furious kinds of actions and transported my tongue into strange and fonde spéeches Behold how my vnaccustomed gorgious apparrell my prodigall attyre my scalding and newe sighes my vnwonted gesture franticke fits the losse of my rest quietnes and health and many other things which this newe loue brought wyth it amōgst many other Seruaunts and familiars in my house made a Nurce of mine especially to meruaile much who as shee was burdened with many yéeres so in rype wysedome and good experience shee was not yong at all And who
open company to make me therby more assured of his feruent looue calling me by the name of Fiammetta and hymselfe Pamphilus Alas howe many times in the presence of my selfe and of my déerest fréendes being prittely heated with feasting and looues eates did he deuise fayning Fiammetta and Pamphilus to be Grecians how I with him and he with me were first combyned in loouing bondes And afterwardes what accidentes did ensue of this Grecian looue collouring his forged nouell with fit and fayned names It made me truely many times to laughe not so much at the grauitie and conterfaite modestie in his discourse as at the simplicitie and good meaning of those who gaue eare and beléefe to his tale And yet I was sometimes afrayd least that both his disordinate heates might haue vnaduisedly perhappes transported his tongue thether whether it would afterwardes haue repented that it runned But as he was a more prudent perfect scholler then I tooke him to be so did he craftely take héede of speaking of false Latine O gentle and pittifull Ladies what dooth not looue teache his subiectes and whom dooth not he enable to learne wise discourses and acquainte him with braue and commendable fashione My selfe being but a young and simple woman in such pastimes Looue a cunning master and scarce able amōgst other gentlewomen my companions in plaine and common thinges to vntie my vnperfect tongue by giuing a willing and an affectioned eare to his spéeches did reape thereby so much fruite that in a short time in fayning and talking I thought I did excell euery famous Poet. For there were fewe or none of his presupposed positions but with a fictions and painted tale I woulde haue effectually argued and fitly aunswered to the same a very hard thing in my opinion for a young gentlewoman to learne so soone and more difficult to tel or put in practise But all these shiftes would séeme but shadowes and of no consequence if I did write and set downe if present matter shoulde require with what subtill slights I did experiment the faith of one of my most familiar and trusty womē to whom we bothe purposed to committe the secrecie of our hidden loue not as yet by spéeches manifested to anie one considering with my selfe that enclosed in my burning brest it coulde not bee kept there long without great trouble and gréefe and perhappes without some violent and suddaine issue vnlesse there were some meanes and remedies applyed to the contrarie It would be besides this a tedious labour to recount what counsell and how manie deuises were excogitated betwéene her and me perhaps in vain and foolish matters and neuer put in vre no not so much as imagined of anie before All which although I haue séene them putte in tryall to my great preiudice and hinderaunce I am not sorrie neuerthelesse that I haue knowne them If I doo not erre Gentlewomen in my opinion With what difficulty louers are contained in the bonds of reason the great firmenes of our yong yéeres was verie straunge to beholde if that with a due and perfecte consideration it is well weighed how hard a thing it is for the enamored mindes of two yong and rawe louers to continue any long time vnited together but that on the one or other side spurred on wyth superfluous and ouerruling desires they should alter wander out of reasons course But the bondes of our loues were so fast knit and of such rare tenour that the grauest wisest and strongest personages in like passages should haue gotte them high and worthy praises But now my stayned penne with an vnbridled and wanton desire dooth prepare it selfe to write of those finall termes of loue beyond that which none can passe furder with déede or desire whatsoeuer But before I come to this point as humbly as I may I implore gentle Ladyes your pietie and therewithall that amorous force which possessing your tender breastes dooth also draw your burning desires to such an end And pray you moreouer if my spéeches séeme offensiue vnto you I speake not of the déede because I know that if you haue not as yet attained to such felicity you haue in your minds a thousand times wished to haue felt the same that then moste prompt you would arise in my excuse and defence And thou séemelie and honest shamefastnes to late alas entred into my wilful minde pardon mee most earnestlie entreating thée to giue place a little while to timerous yong Gentlewomē because secure and frée from thy restraint and menaces they may reade that of me which in their feruent loues I know and hote desires they also wishe might handsomelie befall vnto them With hungry hope therfore and ful of feareful cares our longing desires The slack dealing in conducting amorous desires to their end is very bitter yet lingring delaies drew one eche daie after other which bothe of vs with painfull thoughts didde hourelie endure albeit that one did manifest the same in daily méeting and secrete talke together and the other did shewe her selfe in graunting of it verie coye and in shewe repugnant though against her will as you your selues in séeking that which perhaps most of all doth please your wanton appetites doo knowe well enough that enamoured yong gentlewomen are wont to doo He therfore giuing but little credit to my words in these denials attending fitt time place more audacious then aduised in that which he did and more fortunate then wise obtained that of me which I as wel as he though with a fained face and a little rigorous resisting to the contrarie did most gréedilie desire But if I shoulde for all this affirme that this was the occasion that made mée loue him more I must confesse that euery time that the remembraunce thereof touched my guiltie minde it brought with it an incomparable gréefe Wherefore let the Gods aboue the secrete serchers of our harts bee witnesses wyth me héerein that this ineuitable accident was then and yet is the least cause of that great loue which I beare him Albeit not denying but that this was thē and euermore since a most swéete wyshed and welcommed delight vnto mee And what simple and slender witted woman is shee who would not wish that thing which she déerely loued to bee rather néere vnto her then farre of from her and by how much she loued desired it by so much more to féele the same néerest of al vnto her I say therfore that after such a quickly passed chance not fallen in the cōpasse of my belly before thogh not seldome times tossed in my thoughts with excéeding ioy and fauourable fortune not once but manie times by meanes of our proper wits and new inuentions we recreated our selues with this maner of dainty disport although the pleasures of the same is now alas lighter then the windes flowne from me vnhappy womā But yet while these pleasant times passed on as loue it selfe can make true report and giue
brought vp and nourtered in his lappe by that looue which continually he had borne mee and by the duetie and that looue which I should beare him againe and by that requisite obedience which euery chyld should beare vnto his father and by all other things that he thought most effectuall and perswasiue did like a familiar fréende whose parte is rather to commaund pray me that to commiserate his aged and declyning yéeres and to tender his welfare I would with spéede returne to visite him And besides this with solemnes othes and serious obtestations he caused all his fréendes and agents in these partes and with most earnest entreaties prouoked them incessantly to pricke me on in this behalfe saying that if he did not sée me shortly with him The lawes of nature are most strong his miserable soule would vtterly forsake his olde and comfortlesse body But alas howe strong and forcyble are the lawes of nature I could not presently assent nor yet can scarce resolue with my selfe that by reason of the great loue I beare thée these pittious exorations should take place in me Whereupon hauing with thy good leaue determined to goe sée him and for his great comfort to remaine some short space of time with him and not knowing also how I could liue without thée all these I say occurring and accumulated in my sorrowfull memorie doo make me euery hower swéete Lady most iustly and sorrowfully complaine And thus he helde his peace If there was euer any of you fayre Ladyes that in her most feruent and zealous looue had euer had so hard and bitter a Pille as this euen she I thinke dooth know with what incomparable gréefe my minde nourished long since with foode of his looue and set one fyre with vnspeakable flames of my owne was then afflicted But others frée from such amorous passions could not conceiue because as allegations of extrauagant examples so all my spéeches besides would not be sufficient to induce them to beléeue the same The force of an amorous passion In bréefe therefore I say that hearing these wordes my soule did séeke to leape out of my body and it had I thinke flowen away if betwéene his armes whome most of all it looued it had not béene straightly embraced and forciblye reteyned But all the partes of my body remaining neuerthelesse full of shaking feare and my hart puffed with swelling gréefe and weltring in the passions of these agonies they bereaued me a pritty while of my spéech But afterwards by quantity of time made more pliable to sustaine these neuer felte sorrowes and vnwoonted paynes a certayne féeble and fearefull force was restored to my daunted spirites And my eies whose conduites stopped by the violence of this vnexpected accident did now burst out into great plenty of teares and the stringes of my tongue contracted together with sharpe sorrowe were now dissolued to vtter and breath out the confused anguish and conceiued sorrowes in my minde Wherfore turning me to the Gardien and Lord of my life embracing him I sayd thus O final hope and soueraigne comfort of my afflicted soule let these my pittifull words take place with force in thy fléeting minde diuert thée from thy newe purpose because if thou doost so déerely looue me as thou shewest thy life and mine before theyr naturall and prefixed period commeth may not ioyntly be depriued of this ioyfull and swéete light Haled on by duetifull pitty and drawne backe againe by zealous looue thou puttest all thy future fortunes in doubtfull hazard But certes if all thy words are true with which thou hast not once but many times heretofore affirmed that thou didst looue me no other pittie therfore then this should be more mightie and of greater force to resist nor whyle I liue to withdrawe thée to any other place And harken why It is not vnknowen to thée if thou followest that course which thou séemest to doo in what a doubtfull miserable estate thou leauest my poore life which heretofore hath hardly passed one day not without great sorrowe when I could not sée thée Then mayest thou by this be more acertained that whē thou doost omitte to visite me so long togeather all my ioyes will vtterly forsake mee and this alas would be to much But who dooth not doubt that all kindes of woes sorrowe and anxieties will assaile mee and succéede in theyr place which without any resistance that I can possibly make will perhappes dissolue my vitall powers into nothing Thou shouldest haue already knowen howe weake and impotent young women are to rebacke such cruell and aduerse occurrauntes and what féeble force they haue with a stronge and resolute minde to endure them If peraduenture thou wilte obiect and say that in the fyrst beginning of my looues I haue both wisely and stoutly suffered greater aduersities then these I will truely agrée with thée herein but the occasions of them and of these are diuers My hope placed in my owne vallour made that séeme lyght vnto me which now béeing put in an other his will wil be to heauy for mee to supporte Who did euer denie me when burning desire had beyond all measure kindled my brest and surcharged it with furious passions that being enamored of thée as thou wert also of me I might not enioy thée Truely no bodie Which comfort when thou art so farre sequestred from me will not so easelie fall to my lotte Besides this I enioyed no more then but the sight of thy swéete face and goodlie personage and knewe thée no more but by the outward figure lineaments and proportion of thy body although in my hart I made great account and prise of thée but nowe haue by good proofe perceiued and felt in déede that as thou art nowe to be estéemed a great deale déerer of me then the reache of my imagination could then extend vnto euen so art thou now become mine own with that assured surenes those indissoluble bōds with which true loouers may possibly be held and vnited to those that looue them againe It is a greater greefe to leese a certaintie for an vncertaintie And who dooth not doubt moreouer that it is a greater gréefe to loose that which one hath in holde then that which he hopeth to haue although his hope therein bee not afterwardes frustrate Wherefore considering this matter well I plainely sée my death will soone approch Shall therefore the looue of thy olde father be preferred before that great affection which thou oughtest to haue of me be the ominous occasiō of my vntime lie death And if thou doost so thou art certes no loouer but an open enemie Ah wilt thou make more account of those few yéeres reserued for the miseries of thy olde father then of these many which by great reason and likelihood I haue liuing ioyfully with thée to spende Alas what indiscréete folly were this Doost thou beléeue that any one conioyned to thée in parentage néerest in blood or most
pray thée by tarying here stil to the comfort weale of both our liues My words encreased his teares in great aboundance of the which with intermingled and swéet kisses I drunke vp some But after many a heauy sigh that he fetched he answered me thus againe O chéefest and singuler felicitie of my soule I doubtlesse know thy words to be most true as by euery manifest daunger included in them thou hast plainly set down before my eyes But because since present and vrgent necessity doth require which I would it did not I may bréefely answer thée I tel thée that to paie and acquite with a short gréefe a long and great debt I thinke my Fiammetta thou wilt easilye graunt that I may and must iustly doo Thou must therefore think and rest assured that although I am sufficiently by the pitty of my sicke and aged Father duely obliged yet am I no lesse nay rather more straightly bounde by the same which I ought to haue of vs bothe which if it were lawfull to discouer it woulde of it selfe séeme excusable enough presupposing that what thou hast said shoulde bee iudged of my Father or of any other els for him I would then leaue and let my olde Father die without séeing him at all But since it behooueth that this pittie muste bee couert and kept close and accomplished also without manifesting the cause of it I sée not how without great infamy and reprehensiō I might anie way desist to performe the same To auoide which due slaunder in not discharge of my duetie frowning Fortune shall but thrée or foure monethes at the most interrupt suspend our woonted delights which no sooner expired but without all faile thou shalt sée me ioyfully return to thée againe and make both our harts as glad at our merry méeting as they are nowe dolefully daunted with their sorrowfull parting And if the place to which I goe is so vnpleasant as thou makest it and as it is indéede compared with this thy swéete selfe also béeing héere then this must greatly content thée thinking that if there were no other occasion that shoulde prouoke mee to departe from thence the qualities of the place moste contrarye to the disposition of my mind would bee forcible motiues to make me returne and come hither againe Graunt mee therefore swéete Mistresse this fauoure that I may goe thither and as thou hast béene héeretofore most carefull of my estate and honor so now likewise tender the same and arme thy mind with patience in this crosse of spightfull Fortune because knowing this accident to be most gréeuous vnto thée I may héere after make my selfe more assured that in anie chaunce of Fortune whatsoeuer my honor is as déere to thée as my selfe He had now saide and helde his peace when I be ganne thus to reioyne as foloweth Nowe doo I cléerely sée that which framed in thy inflexible mind thou dost beare inexorable And I scarcely thinke that in the same thou doost admit any thought at all of those great infinite cares with which thou leauest my distressed soule so heauily burdened deuiding thy selfe from me Things that are wont to hurt a louers mind which not one day night nor houre canne possiblie liue héere without a thousande feares And I shall remaine in continuall doubt of thy life which I pray the Gods may be prolonged aboue my daies to thine owne will and desire Alas what néede I with superfluous spéeche prolong the time in discoursing and reciting of them by one and one Dangers that hang daily ouer mortal mē thy selfe knowing well enough that the Sea hath not so manie sandes nor heauen so manie starres as there be doubtfull and dangerous perilles that are imminent and commonly incident to mortall men All the which if thou goest from hence as doubtles they will not a little feare mee so will they greatlie offend and hurt thée Woe is me for my sorrowful life I am ashamed to tell thée that which nowe commeth to my mind but because by that which I haue heard it séemeth a thing possible and likely constrained therfore I will tell it thée Now if in thy country in the which as the common fame is and as my selfe perticulerly haue hearde there is an infinite number of faire and daintie Ladies who spending their yong yeres in cunning loue solemne sports and feasts the first a passion especially incident to them and the second a common thing vsed there with wanton and aluring meanes are most expert to entise and procure loue again thy wandring eie should espie some one of these which might perhappes please thy absent hart and so for her loue shouldest neglect and forget mine ah what a miserable life should I then leade Wherefore if thou doost beare me such feruent affection as thou sayest and séemest to doo imagine howe thou wouldest take it if for exchaunge of an other which thinge shall neuer come to passe I should denye thée Panphilus my loue But before my true hart shoulde harbour one trecherous thought thereof these handes of myne should rent it from my brest and be the executioners of my iust death But let vs leaue these imaginations and that which wée desire may neuer happen let vs not with ominous auguries diuinate and tempt the Gods in vaine But if thy minde be resolutly bent to departe and forasmuch as there is nothing that can please mee which may anie wayes displease and discontent thée I must of necessity dispose my selfe to bee agréeable to thy wyll héerein Notwithstanding with earnest prayers I request thée that it would please thée in one thing to follow my minde in delaying I meane yet a little longer if possiblye it may bée thy suddaine and sorrowful iourney during which time imagining in the meane time thy departure with continuall thinking thereof presupposing thy absence I may with lesse gréefe of mind learne frame my selfe to liue without thee which is no straunge thing for mée to request nor harde for thée to graunt since that the weather which for this time of the yéere is most vnreasonable doth greatlie encline to the helpe and fauour of thys my desire and is most contrary to the drifte of thy determination Why doost not thou sée Virgill immitated in the 4. boke of Aeneas howe the skyes full of dark and blacke clowdes with tempests stormes and flooddes of powring rayne and Hylles of thicke snowes choaking vppe the waies with raging and boysterous windes and horrible thunders doo dailie threaten the earth and earthlie creatures with manifest daungers And as thou canst not otherwise know how euery little Riuer and Brooke is nowe by these continuall showers of rayne swelled into daungerous and myghtye flooddes What senceles man thē is hée pardon me good Panphilus who hauing so small regarde of his life would in this blustering stormy and yll weather take any voyage or iourney in hand Doo therfore my pleasure in this reasonable aduise which if
thou wilt not do then tender thy owne safety doo the duety which thou owest to thy owne selfe herein Lett these lowring and doubtfull times passe on and stay for calmer winde and weather to trauell at thine ease and wyth lesse daunger And my selfe in the meane while accustomed by little litle and enured to pensiue sorrowful thoughts will with more patience attend thy ioyfull return To these words he deferred not his aunswere but saide The tormenting paines and variety of painfull cares in the which Oh déerest Mistresse against my will content an pleasure I leaue thée and those which vnfainedly I carry with mee in mine owne breast let the comfortable hope of my spéedie returne asswage and mittigate Nor is it pardon me sweete Ladie a point of wisedome to busie thy thoughts about that death I meane which may as well preuent mée héere as surprise in another place when my destynies must néedes yéeld to their time and to her stroke Nor to coniecture and prognosticate of those accidēts possible perhaps to annoy me as more likely to be prosperous vnto me Where and when soeuer the wrathe of the Gods or their fauour doth light vppon one euen there and then without vaine resistance must he be content to suffer good or yll Referre therefore al these things to their disposition with neuer thinking or once looking after them who knowing our necessities can prouide better for vs then we our selues desiring thée to apply thy mind rather and imploy thy whole cogitations in humble supplications and requests to them the gracious Goddes I meane that they may haue a prosperous and happy euent But that I euer become Louer to any woman then to thee Fiammetta to whose loyall and euerlasting seruice I religiouslye dedicate my hart with oath bind my selfe Great loue himselfe yea though I woulde my selfe wyth all hys might can neuer bring to passe for with so strong and sure a chaine Loue hath lincked my hart to thine swéete affection hath made my soule subiect to thy signorie and déepe desyre hath bounde mee for euer to thy dispositions And assure thy selfe of this besides That the earth shall firste bring foorth glittering Stars and the heauen plowed wyth Oxen shal bring forth ripe corne before Panphilus shall or will in any thing transgresse the lawes of thy péerelesse loue or entertaine any other woman into the closett of his constant hart The delay of my departure into my Countrey which thou dost request of me if I knew it could any waies auaile thée or be profitable vnto me I woulde more willingly performe then thou doost require But since the daily differing of it is an howrely augmentation of our sorrowes and in departing nowe I should returne againe before the time of my long tariance héere shoulde bee according perhappes to thy mind fully finished I thinke it therefore a great deale better to hasten my iourney Which space of time thou dost also craue to learne as thou saist supposed sorrowes wherin thou doost simply deceiue thy selfe considering that in thys meane time thou shouldest haue my selfe not béeing heere that selfe same gréefe so forcible and extreame which at my departure indéede and in my vnfained absence thou woldest conceiue And as for the foulenes of the weather I will vse as other times I haue béene accustomed to doo a good and wholesome remedy which I would the Gods granted that I had nowe occasion to practise returning frō thence again as in departing from hence I know to worke well enough And therefore with a chéerefull and strong mind my louing Fiammetta dispose thy selfe to this which when thou must doo thou mayst better passe away in dooing it on a suddain then with successiue feare and lingering sorrow expect euery houre when to begin it My teares at the ende of his perswasion somewhat relented attending some other aunswere and hearing this sorowfull discourse did redouble their falling drops The maner of those that loue Wherefore laying my heauy head vppon hys breast I stayed a good whyle without speaking any more vnto him and reuoluing many things in my mind I could not assent to hys consolatorie perswasions nor dissent from his alledged assertions For alas who woulde haue aunswered otherwise to his words but thus Doo that which pleaseth thée best and come quickly againe Truely I beléeue none But not wythout great gréefe and effusion of many teares after a long while I gaue him that aunswere telling him moreouer that vndoubtedly it shoulde be a great wonder to finde mee aliue at his return After I had spoken these words one comforting vp the other we wyped and dryed vppe each others teares and for that night did deferre them till some other time And he kéeping his olde custome came to sée mee manie times which were but a fewe daies alas before his departure much chaunged in habite and more as it séemed altered in minde from that since first he sawe me But that wofull night ah that black and thrise cruell night being come which was the beginning of all my annoyes and the last conclusion of all my ioyes with diuerse and sundrye discourses but not without great anguish of mind gréeuous wailings and Seas of teares and of sorrowfull sobs sighes on bothe sides we passed soone away Which although for that time of the yéere was very long yet to mee it séemed the shortest night in all my life time The description of the day And now the open day the menacing enemie and deuider of Louers began to ouercome the light of the stars the signe of which comming on very faste after it appeared to my eyes embracing him most straightly I sayd thus O the swéetest Lorde of my life what cruell one is hee that dooth take thée from me What angry God is that which with so great force doth wreack his ire on mee that while I liue it may be sayde Panphilus is not there where hys Fiammetta is Woe is me therefore poore soule that knowing not whether thou goest now shal liue desolate and destitute of thy company When will that happy time come when once againe I shall betwéene my stretched armes enfolde this louely and swéete body Alas I feare me neuer And as I knowe not so am I not able to expresse that which my miserable hart diuining went vppe and downe saying and lamenting in this sorrowfull sorte But often times recomforted of him againe I kissed him infinit times And after many louing embracements both of vs very loth to ryse yet at the last the encroching light of the newe day compelling vs vnwillingly wee didde forsake the receptacle and secrete testimonie of our delights And hee preparing nowe to giue me his last kysses and farewels wyth plentious teares I first beganne to vtter these words Behold my onely loue thou goest and in short time doost promise thy returne Wherefore assure mee thy fayth héereof if so it please thée so that expecting the same not
restore to thée againe thy lost comfort preserue thée so long in life that we may sée our selues once againe ioyfull and merry togeather as nowe depriued of all consolation this bitter departing dooth deuide vs a sunder And all the while he spake these wordes hee did so extreamely lament that the vehement sobbes and sighes that séemed to cleane the heauens and his loude plaintes did oftentimes strike a great feare into mée least that they hadde béene not heard of those onely in our house but of our next neighbours also And not permitted now to tarrie any longer by reason of the cléere brightnesse of the day that more and more came créeping on with greater aboundaunce of teares then before hee sayd Ah my swéete heart farewell And drawen away as it were by force hytting his foote a great blowe against the thresholde of the doore An ominous and ill presage hee went out of our house From whence being gonne S.T. hée sayde looking backe meaning that hée coulde scarce goe forewardes and still looking backe at euerie steppe thinking that when you came to your selfe agayne I should call him backe againe to you She nowe helde her peace And I good Ladyes as you may imagine sorrowinge and lamenting for the departure of my deere loouer remayned the most comfortlesse and distressed woman bewailing with continuall teares his sodayne and vnfortunate absence FINIS ⧠The thyrd booke of Maister Iohn Boccace bys Fiammetta AS you haue heard gentle Ladyes before euen in such sorte my Panphilus being gonne did I remaine and with manie teares not a fewe daies after I woefully beewailed his sorrowfull departure And there was not anything else in my mouth although I spake it softlie to my selfe thē O my Panphilius how may it be that thou hast forsaken me This name truelie when I remembred the swéet accents of it Fond thoughts of loouers amongest my many bitter teares did yéelde mée no small comfort There was no parte of my chamber which I did not with a most desirous eye beholde saying to my self Here did my Panphilus sit héere did he lye heere did I kisse him And in bréefe euery place in the same by representinge such swéete obiects to my memorie was most déere vnto me Sometimes I fayned with my selfe thinking that retourned backe againe he came to séeme and as if he had béene indéede I looked towardes the chamber doore and perceiuing my selfe deluded with my vaine fancie I was angrie wyth my selfe knowing that I was deceiued indéede And because I would driue away vaine cogitations I remember that often times I beganne to busie my selfe about many thinges but ouercome of newe imaginations and leauing the same vndonne my miserable hart with an vnaccustomed beating did begin to molest me I called to my minde many thinges which I would at his departure haue sayd vnto him and repeating also many times with my selfe those wordes which we had to eache other spoken And in this manner not setling my minde firmely on any thing I liued many dayes together a most sorrowful and pensiue life But after that this great gréefe conceiued by his departure by length of tyme was somewhat alleuiated more forcible and violent thoughtes began to enter into my minde and being lodged there did with probable and apparant reasons kéepe and defende themselues there And not many daies after remaining all alone in my chamber it came to passe that I beganne to say to my selfe Beholde my loouer is gonne and is goinge on his weary way and thou poore soule couldest not at his departure once say farewell nor pray the Goddes to be his guides nor kisse his troubled countenaunce no not so much as sée him which thinges if hée kéepe in minde and if any infortunious accident which the Goddes forbidde happen vnto him coniecturing some ominous signe by thy silence Louers often times blame and excuse thēselues againe may greatly perchaunce blame thée for it This thought troubled my minde very much at the first but a new counsell and conceite of other matters remooued it againe from mee because among my sundry thoughtes I sayd with my selfe I ought not to incurre any blame herein because he being endued with great wisedome will sooner expound my suddaine extasie for a luckie presage saying She sayd not farewell which is commonly wont to be sayd to them who meane to absent themselues for a great while when they depart or else vtterly to take their leaue but holding my peace he will rather thinke with him selfe that it was a signe wherby to note that short time assigned for his stay there And recomforting my selfe againe with this flattering imagination I let it passe and entred into other new and diuers thoughts And being thus beset with sorrowe one euerie side I remained all alone my heart being wholy pensiue for him walking sometimes vppe and downe in my solitarie chamber sitting downe now in this place and now standing in a muse in that and other sometimes leaning my heauie head vpon my hand against my bed side I sayd to my selfe Oh that my Panphilus were come hether now againe And then from these fancyes I passed into other newe conceytes As sometimes for example with great gréefe I called to minde how with smyting his foote against the thresholde of the doore he went out of my chamber as my trusty waiting woman had tolde mee And remembring also that Laodameia did gather no greater token of Protesilaus hys long absence and vnperformed retourne by no other signe then by this it made me many times fal into great and ruth full considerations thereof fearing least the selfe same thing which the Goddes graunt not might as vnfortunatelie befall to me But not conceiuing yet in the depth of my minde what should happen vnto me indéede I let these as vayne and friuolous imaginations passe away which did neuer the sooner at my will and pleasure departe but when others comming a freshe in their places then did these forsake my melancolike minde And recounting those now in my minde that were come which were so many and so great that to thinke of their number onely if of nothing else it was no small payne to my poore heart Troubles cares are wont to extinguish looue in young men for I did not once remember amongest my other thoughtes that I had reade in Ouide his verses that troubles cares and painefull affaires did driue looue out of younge and tender myndes but rather so often when I remembred that hée was on his way And thinking that these were no small annoyaunces vnto euery one and especiallie to him whome I knewe had béene euer accustomed to rest and acquainted with ease and nowe most of all when hee was constrained to them against his will Wherfore I dyd first greatly doubt with my selfe least the smallest of these gréefes might not haue bene meanes forcible enough to haue taken him from me and feared againe least his vnwoonted trauailes and
the hurtefull and vnseasonable weather might haue béene an occasion of sicknesse or of some worse mischaunce that might haue hindered his deseignes and so hurt my desires And in this dolefull imagination I remember my minde was longer busied then in any other although that I did often times argue by the induction of his vnfayned teares which I did sée trickle downe his chéekes and of my painefull troubles which neuer chaunged my firmenesse that it could not bee a true conclusion that for so little gréefe so great loue should be extinct hoping also that his young age mastred with singuler discretion and wisedome would defend and kéepe him from any other hurtfull accident Thus therfore in opposing answering dissoluing my owne obiections I spent so many daies that I dyd not onely thinke that he was now arriued in his countrie but I was also certified thereof by his letters which for many causes were most welcome and acceptable vnto me in the which he certified me that with greater flames of affection he burned more in my looue then euer he did and with stronger promises did reuiue my hope of his returne Wherefore my first thoughtes being gonne from this howre foreward new fancies did quicklie arise in their places For sometimes I sayd Now my Panphilus the onely belooued sonne of his olde father who many yéeres before had not séene him receiued of him with great ioye They that looue are alwaies in suspition feasted of all his kinsfolkes and déerely entertayned of all his fréendes dooth not onely forget me but dooth I thinke accurse the monethes daies and howers in the which with diuers occasions heretofore my looue hath stayed him here And honourablie welcomed of all his compeers and with ioyfull congratulation of all Ladyes and Gentlewomen dooth blame mee perhappes who knew not how to féede his dainty fancies in anie thing else then in simple vnfolding my secréete looue and the straung effects of my new affections vnto him when he was here And mindes full of mirth and iollitie are apte to be drawen from one place and to be bound to another according to the mutabilitie of their pleased and displeased fancies But alas may it now be that I should léese him in this sorte Truely I cannot hardly thinke it The Gods forbidde that this should come to passe graunt that as amongst my parentes and kinsfolkes and in my own natiue Citty they haue made and kept me onely his So amongst his kindred and in his natural countrie let them vouchsafe to preserue him one lie mine Alas with how many salt teares were these wordes mingled and with how many more should they haue béene if I had beléeued that that which they themselues did truely prognosticate should afterwardes haue prooued true albeit that those which then came not foorth I haue afterwards in trebble folde spent all in vaine Besides such spéeches my mind diuining often times of her woes to come surprised I know not with what feare did greatly tremble and quake which feare was most cōmonly resolued into these stinging thoughtes and wordes Panphilus abidinge now ioyfully in his Cittye full of most famous and excellēt temples and by reason of most solemne and high feastes with excéeding pompe and glory celebrated there dooth with great pleasure visite them where he cannot chuse but finde many fayre and noble women which as in surpassing beautie gallant behauiour and good graces they excell all others so most of them being skilfull practicioners in theyr entising arte with subtile snares and amorous allectiues are passing cunning to entrappe young and gentle mindes thereby to drawe them to theyr liking and so to lure them to their looue Alas who can then be so strong a gardien of himselfe where so many motiues doo concurre but must mauger his bearde at sometime or other by plaine force be ouertaken as I my selfe not many monthes sithence by like powers also assailed may be an approoued and haplesse president of such straung and strong vertues which in my simple breast preuailed And besides this new thinges are wont to delight more then olde It is therefore but an easie matter that he being newly ariued and a straunger may please them and they him againe Alas how gréeuous was this imagination to me the which that it shoulde not come to passe I coulde scarce driue out of my minde saying thus Howe may Panphilus who loueth thée more then himselfe receiue into that hart enclosed in thine any other newe loue Why dost not thou know that there is héere perhaps some braue Lady well worthy of hys loue who with greater force then with that of her eies hath oft assaide and endeuoured to enter into his hart but coulde not find any way wherby he béeing yet scarce thine as now he is so many more Goddesses also of beautie passing vppe and downe in this Cittie and yet not anie one of them able to mooue his minde Howe canst thou then thinke that hee may bée so soone enamoured as thou sayst And besides this doost thou beléeue that he would violate that troth which so religiouslie he auowed vnto thée for any other faith It may neuer be and therfore thou must trust to his fidelity and relie vppon his good discretion With great reason thou oughtest to think that he is not so meanelie wise but that he knoweth well enough that it is but méere folly to leaue that which alreadie he hath to gette that which he hath not yea if that which he would forsake were but a smal thing and of great deale lesse account in respect of that which hee séeketh to attaine béeing of greater estimation and value And of this also thou must haue an infallible hope that this cannot so easily come to passe because if the great fame and generall report of thy beauty be true which thy selfe hast often hearde thou mayest placed amongst the number of the brauest Ladies in his Countrey and to the fairest of them all paragoned be prised aboue the best which hath not in it anie one richer brauer or more nobly borne then thy selfe And besides this whom can he finde amongst all the Gentlewomē in his Citty that would nay that coulde loue him so déerely as thou doost Againe hee is not ignoraunt as one expert in amorous affaires how hard a labour and intricate a matter it is so to dispose and worke with any woman to make her like at the first or at the first assaults to make her yéeld to loue And although he did not loue thée at all yet béeing troubled about many affaires of his Father and occupied with his proper busines he could not nowe bee at vacant leysure to acquaint himselfe with other newe women Wherefore let not thys onely fall into thy thought but hold it for an infallible Maxime that as much as thou louest so much thou art beloued againe Alas how falsly sophistically were these argumēts coyned against the truth But with all my disputing I could
neuer refel and put out of my mind the obscure and miserable ielosie entred into it for aduantage and accomplishment of my other gréefes But yet somewhat lightened as if I had argued truely and eased a little therby I did to my féeble power remooue such iniurious thoughts from my mind O déerest Ladies because I will not spende the time in recounting euery one of my vncouth thoughts what were my most carefull déedes you shall nowe heare At the strangnes of which meruaile not since I must néedes follow not those which I woulde but such as it pleased Loue to giue mee ah those was I constrayned to performe Very fewe mornings escaped me when rysen out of my weary bedde I went not vppe to the highest turrets of my Pallace and from thence no otherwyse then the Marryners clymbing vp to the topp of their maine Mast doo prie on euerie side to sée if they can espy any dangerous Rocks or ken any land that is nere which may hinder their continued course I first looked about mee on euery side And afterwards fastning myne eies stedfastly towards the East I did mark how much the Sun eleuated aboue the Horison had spent of the new day and the more I saw it higher the more I said to my selfe that the terme of Panphilus his return drew on and many times I did with great delight as it were sée it rise come forth discerning sometimes my own shadow by the ascended quantity of it in the Meridiall line made lesse lesse and somtimes loking to the space of his body made bigger by the earth in his setting I said with my selfe that hee went more slowly then euer he did before and did lengthen the daies more in Capricorne then he was wont to do in Cancer and so likewise moūted vp to the middle circle I saide that there he staied too long to delight himselfe in ouerloking the wide earth And although hee glided down swiftly towards the west yet me thought he was too long in his course again whose light after that our Hemisphere had lost that the twinckling stars had ful scope to shew forth theirs thus partly contented Louers mark their daies with stones I went numbring calling to mind many times with my self the daies that were past with litle stones did mark those with other daies also that were to come no otherwise thē in times past deuiding their mery and happy daies from their sorrwful and dismal times with litle black white stones were wont to doo O howe many times do I now remēber that before their due time I did put a stone there thinking that so much of the prescribed terme should be diminished howe much the sooner I adioyned it to that which was already past somtimes counting the litle stones assigned for the daies past and somtimes telling those which stoode for those daies which were yet to come although I kept the number of euery one of them very wel in my minde thinking euery time to haue found some of thē increased and that the other shold haue béen diminished So did my eager hote desire transport me to the wished end of the prefixed terme Vsing therfore these vain cares I returned many times to my desolate chamber more desirous to be there all alone then willinglie in any cōpany And when I was alone to driue away sorowful cogitations I opened a certain casket of mine out of the which I tooke many things somtimes his fauours bestowed on me by one one and the delight great desire which once I had in beholding him I did now take in gazing vpō them which when I had séene scarce able to containe my swelling teares yet fetching great sighes I kissed thē and as if they had béen rational creatures things of vnderstanding I did aske them saying When wil your M. be here laying thē vp again I drew forth many of his leters which he had somtimes sent me reading almost euery one of them ouer and imagining that I did talke with him I felt no litle cōfort I called oftentimes my faithful secret maid vnto me with whō I had much and diuers communication touching him sometimes asking her what her hope was of hys returne and sometimes what shee thought of him or if at any time shee had heard any thing of him To all which demaundes eyther to please me or els according to her opinion aunswering the truth it was a great comfort to my desolate minde And thus many times I passed away the greater part of the day with lesse gréefe sadnes I tooke no lesse pleasure and content then in the forsaide things to visit the holy Temples Variety of talke doth diminish sorrow and sadnes and to sitte at my Pallace Gate with other Gentlewomen of my acquaintance where often times with sundrie discourses my infinite cares were somewhat remooued from mee To which places sometimes resorting it fell out often that I sawe dyuers of those yong Gentlemen whom I did knowe to kéepe Panphilus companie and whensoeuer I espied them I did neuer forgette to looke amongst them if happilie I might sée Panphilus wyth them as sometimes I did O how often times was I vainly deluded with this foolish imaginatiō And although I was thus deceiued yet it did me much good to sée them whom as by their pittifull countenaunces they bewrayed as much I sawe full of like compassion that I had in séeing themselues alone as it were and depriued of their swéete companion and who me thought séemed not halfe so merry as they were wont to be Ah what a great desire had I many times to aske them what was become of their gentle friende and associate if reason and modesty had not counterchecked my eagre wil herein But Fortune truely was sometimes fauourable to mée herein because in talking of him in such like places thinking that I did not heare and vnderstand them they said that his returne was almost at hand howe swéete these words were to myne eares it were a bootelesse labour to expresse In this sorte therefore and with such sundry thoughtes and superstitious déedes and with many other like these I dyd studie to passe the tedious daies away which were so yrkesome to mée in their length desiring therefore stil for night not because of bothe I thought it more profitable or comfortable for me but because when it was come there was the more time spent and the lesse to passe away After that the combersome day therefore whose long howers being finished gaue place to silent night fresh fancies and new cares came also in company with the same And I who from my cradle béeing naturally giuen to bee afraide in the solitarye darknes of night accompanied nowe with mighty loue Loue doth assure Louers in darknes was frée from all manners of feare And perceiuing euery one in my house to take their quiet rest sometimes I went vppe alone to that place
small time did make them appeare no otherwise to my fancies then if they hadde béene true indéede Sometimes mee thought hee was returned Dreames represent many times those things which are beloued and that in most fayre Gardens frée from all suspicion and feare decked with gréene leaues swéete flowers and diuers kinds of pleasant fruites I sported and played wyth him as other times we did accustome to doo And there I holding him by the hande and hee mee vnfolding his fortunes good and badde and telling all his accidents vnto mee mee thought that many times before hee had perfectly tolde out his tale with often kissing I didde interrupt him in his delightfull discourses And as if the same hadde béene true indéede which but with fained eyes I did contemplate I said And is it true swéete Panphilus that thou art returned againe Certes it is For héere I haue thée And then I kissed him againe Mée thought that other times wyth great sollace I was walking with him vp and downe the sea banks And sometimes my imagination was so strong héerein that I did affyrme it with my selfe saying Well now I doo not dreame that I haue him betwéene mine armes O howe it gréeued me when it came to passe that my pleasant dreames and swéete sléepe were both ended which going away did continually carie that away with them which without any trouble or gréefe to him I must néedes confesse did oppresse me And although that I remained in great melancoly by remembring of thē liuing neuerthelesse al the next day in good hope I was somewhat content and eased desiring still that night would quicklie drawe on because I might in my sléepe enioy that which waking I could not attaine to And although my sléepe did sometimes yéelde mee such néedy fauours notwithstanding it did not permitte mee to receiue such dreames of pleasure mingled without much bitter and poysoned galle of sorrowe because many times me thought I sawe him apparelled with ragged and forlorne garments besmeared all ouer I know not with what foule and blacke spottes and very pale and fearefull as though hee had béene pursued of some cruell enemie with shrikes and outcryes calling to me Helpe me Oh my Fiammetta helpe me Other tymes me thought I hearde diuers talke and mutter of his death And sometimes these fantasies of horror perced so farre into my minde that me thought I sawe him lie dead before me and in many other vncouth and pittifull formes so that it neuer came to passe that my sléepe was of more force or greater then my gréefe Wherefore sodainely awaked and knowing the vanitie of my dreame as one contented yet but to haue dreamed these terrours and terrible daungers I thāked the Goddes Things sene in dreames are some times true or else figures of true thinges remaining yet some what troubled in minde and fearing that the thinges which I had séene if not in all in parte at least they had béene true or else figures of true thinges to come Neither I was content at any time or perswaded by the contrarietie of these although I sayd with my selfe and heard of others that dreames were but vaine vntill I did heare some newes of him of the which I beganne now carefully and warely to enquier after And in such sorte as you haue heard fayre Ladyes I passed away the tedious dayes and irkesome nightes attending one still after other in their long course But the trueth is that the time of hys promised returne approching I déemed it the best and safest counsell to lyue merely in the meane time by which meanes my beautie a little altered and decayed by reason of this long vnacquainted gréefe might returne againe into her proper place because at his arriuall I might not séeme ill fauored and not gratious in his sight and so might not perhaps please his deinty and curious eyes Which was not harde for mée to doo because being since his departure accustomed and well acquainted with sorrowes it made mée endure and passe them away with verie little trouble or no payne at all And besides this the néere hope of his promysed returne made mée euery day féele a little more ioye and content of mynde Wherefore I beganne to frequent to feastes againe not a little while before intermitted of mée ascribing the occasion thereof to my obscured and clowdie dayes perceauing nowe the cléere and newe times to be at hand Nor no sooner dyd my mynde contracted earst with most bitter and pynching gréefes beginne to dilate and enlarge it selfe in such a pleasaunt and ioyfull life but I became fayrer then euer I was before And I trimmed vppe my gorgeous and rich vestures made my precious ornaments fayrer no otherwise then a valiaunt Knight at armes dooth cleare and make bright his Compleate Harnesse challenged to some worthye and famous combatte because I myght seeme more statelie and brauelie attyred with them at hys returne the whych as after it fell out in vayne I dyd attend As then therefore these actions were chaunged into an other tennour so dyd my thoughtes also chaung theyr coppie Vaine thoughts of loouers It came neuer nowe into my minde that I coulde not sée hym when hée departed nor the remembraunce of the sorrowfull signe of hys smytten foote agaynst the doore nor any thought of stynging and enuious iealousie nor hys susteyned troubles nor my suffered toyles nor his daungers nor my dollours did now molest my peace but rather dayes next before the ende of hys promysed returne I sayd to my selfe Nowe it dooth gréeue my Panphilus to bée long from mée and perceiuing hys time néere according to his promise dooth make short preparation and hast for his spéedy returne And now perhappes hauing left his olde father he is on his waie Oh howe pleasaunt were these wordes vnto me and how often dyd I most swéetly deskant vpon this note thinkinge many times with my selfe with what kinde of most loouing entertainement gratious gesture and swéete and fréendlie shewes I might at the fyrst represent my selfe vnto his personne and welcome him Alas howe many times sayde I to my selfe At his returne he shall be more then a thousand times imbraced of me and my zealous kisses shal be multiplied in such store that they shall not suffer one right and perfect word to come out of his mouth and I will make restitution of them a hundred times redubled which at his departure without receiuing on his parte any againe he gaue to my pale and halfe deade visage And in these kinde of thoughtes I doubted many times with my selfe that I could not bridle that burning and feruent desyre that I should then haue at the first sight of hym to embrace hym if I did perhappes sée him in open an publique companie But the vngentle Goddes as you shall hereafter perceiue found out a sorrowfull meanes which perswaded no feare doubte or mistrust of the due performaunce of any such circumstaunces and ceremonies denying
so strongly perswaded of theyr trueth that I turned my breake brayne thoughts into pittifull prayers to the deuine powers that they would take the same from mée apprehending them so forciblie in my mynde and no more nor lesse then if before mine eyes I had séene his imminent daunger and instaunt death And sometimes I remember that with fyrme beléefe I bewayled hys woefull ende as if I hadde séene any of these intellectuall aduersyties indéede But afterwardes I sayd to my selfe Alas what straunge causes are these which my miserable thoughtes cast before my eyes The Goddes forbydde that any such may befall Let him stay still and as long as pleaseth hym and let hym rather then to content mee or to offer hym selfe to any daungerous ieopardie whych may chaunce indéede though nowe they doo but delude my troubled wyttes not returne nor sée mée at all All which perilles though they are indéede possible yet are they impossible to bée kept close béeing most lyke that the vntimely and violente death of so noble and famous a younge Gentleman as hée is cannot longe bée hydden and concealed especiallie from mée of whose estate and welfare I doo carefully cause and with secrete and subtyle inuestigations doo continually procure dillygent enquirie to bée made And who dooth doubte moreouer if that any of these supposed perrilles were true but that flying Fame Fame a swifte reporter of ill thinges the swift reporter of ill newes would haue long since brought the maner of hys death hether By meanes of whych fortune but my least freende in thys would haue giuen mée an open waie to haue made mee the most sadde and most sorrowfull woman that might be Wherefore I rather beléeue that he remaineth in as great gréefe as I am in if that his most willinge returne is forbidden onely by the heauy commaundementes of his father and therefore he will come quickly or else excusing hys staying so long will for my great comfort write to me the occasion thereof Truely the foresayd thoughts although they did fiercely assault mee yet were they easily enough ouercome and the hope which by the terme determined was enforced to flie from me with all my power I did retaine laying downe before it the long and feruent looue which he bare vnto me and I to him his pawned fayth the adiured and sacred Goddes and his infinite teares in which thinges I did affirme and thinke it impossible that any deceite or guile might be hidden But yet I could not so rule my sorrowfull minde but that this hope thus forcibly kept must néedes giue place to many vagrant and vaine thoughtes that were yet left béehinde which driuing hereby little and little out of my woefull brest did worke amayne to returne to theyr former places reducing eftsoones to my minde diuers prodigious signes and tokens and many other vnfortunate accidents And I did scarcely perceiue the peaceable hope being almost quite expelled out of my heart but I did immediately féele theyr mighty and new forces planted in her place But amongst all other murdering thoughtes that did most of all massacre my gréeuous soule hearing nothing at all in processe of manie dayes of my Panphilus his returne was sharpe and stinging iealousie Ah this spitefully galled and wounded my breast more then I was able to endure This did dissanull all excuses which I had made for him as knowing and consenting to the occasion of his absent déedes This did often times induce me to those spéeches condemned of me before saying Alas how art thou so foolishe to beléeue that eyther the looue of his father vrgent affayres or delightfull pleasures maie now kéepe Panphilus from comming hether if he did looue thée so as once he sayd he dyd Dost not thou know that Loue doth ouercome all thynges Loue doth ouercome all things for he hath feruently perhaps enamoured of some other Gentlewoman quite forgotten thée whose pleasures béeing as forcible as new doo hide and hold him there as somtimes thine did kéepe him here Those foresaid Ladies passing gracious in euery thing they doo and as thou saydst in euery poynt moste apt to loue and with braue allurements endeuouring to bee beloued againe hee himselfe béeing likewise by the delicate purenesse of his cléere complexion naturally inclined to such passions and for many rare and commendable qualities in him most worthy to be beloued applying their whole studyes to hys seruice theyr paynes to his pleasures and hee his desires to their deuotions haue made him become a new Innamorato Art thou so assotted with the fame and glory of thine owne beauty that thou doost not beléeue that other Women haue shyning eyes in theyr heads fayrnes in theyr faces and that they are not as full of courtly behauiour good graces and all things els that may commaunde yong mens mindes as well as thou art And dost thou thinke that they are not so skilfull who are alas a greate deale more then euer thou werte in these amorous attempts as thou art Why thou art deceiued And if this be thy beléefe it is false And dooste not likewise beléeue that he on the otherside can please more then one Woman But yet I thinke that if hee coulde but sée thée it would bee a harde thing for him to loue any other But since he cannot sée thée nor hath not séene thée these many monethes how canst thou déeme otherwise then so Thou must néedes knowe that no worldly accident is permanent and eternall for as he was enamored of thée as thou didst please him so is it possible that another may like him and he abandoning thy loue may affectionate some other New things alwaies please For newe things are euer wont to please a great deale more thē those which are daily séene And euery one dooth with greater affection desire that which hee hath not then that which he hath already in his owne possession Againe there is nothing be it neuer so delightful which by long time enioying vsing the same doth not ware yrkesome at last and of lesse if of none account at all Who wyll not moreouer sooner and more willingly loue a faire new Ladie at his owne house then one whom he hath long since serued in a forraine Countrey and vnknown place He did not also loue thée perhappes with so feruent and zealous affection as he made thée beléeue And neyther his teares nor any of his passions were to bee helde so déere and so sure a pledge of such great loue as he did still affyrme and as thou didst thinke that he did beare thée Many men also departing from their beloued are tormented with anguish gréefe of mind with bitter waylings taking their wofull congies swearing déepely and promising many things profoundlie which with a good and firme intent perhaps they meane to performe but some suddaine and newe chaunce controling the same is an occasion to make them forget al their former oathes and protestations The teares
oathes and promises of yong Men are not nowe and of late become arres and pledges of ensuing deceits for simple and credulous Women They are generally more skilfull and more apt to know all these things then in knowing how to loue such is their vagabond willes leading thē to these inconueniences And there is not anie of thē who would not sooner change tenne Women euery month then to adhere and kéepe himselfe tenne monethes onely to one These continually beléeue to finde out some newe customes formes and deuises and do greatly glory to haue had the loue ah the spoyle of many Women What doost thou therefore hope for Wherefore doost thou suffer thy selfe to bee abused with vaine false beléefe And yet Fiammetta though thou knowst not the meanes art not able to withdraw him from this yet continue thou still in louing him and shewe that with that arte that hee hath betrayed thee thou hast not deceiued him And manie other words followed these which did kindle me with fierce burning anger and which did with a moste timorous heate so enflame my minde that it brought mee almost to vnbeséeming furious and franticke actions Nor the confected rage did first passe away before the infinite teares bursting it a sunder did most aboūdātly issue out of my watry eyes which were accompanied also the same neuerthelesse remayning somtimes with me a good while with great and gréeuous sighes that came smoaking out of my smothered hart which to comforte and chéere vp my selfe agayne condemning that which my presaging minde did foretell me of by maine force as it were the well nighe loste and fugitiue hope with most vaine reasons did returne againe And in this sort recouering almost againe all the ioy that whilome had left mee I liued many dayes betwéene hope and dispaire béeing alwaies carefull and beyond all measure desirous to knowe exactlie what was become of him that came not ◠The fourth booke of Maister Iohn Boccace hys Fiammetta MY teares pittiful Ladies haue béene but light hetherto and my sighes pleasant in respect of those which my sorowfull tongue not so prest to write thē as my hart so prone to féele them doth now prepare to sette downe before you And truly if the paines which I haue passed hetherto are well considered they may be rather termed dalliaunces of a yong and wanton gentlewoman then woes of a tormented Louer Arme your minds therefore wyth firmenes and patience and let not my promises so make you afraid that the thinges which are paste séeming gréeuous vnto you you would not be desirous to heare the sequelles which are full of more sorrow and greater gréefe And I care not gentle Ladyes to comfort you anie whitt in these sad reportes because you might take the more pittie of mee and the more by howe much knowing his malice the greater by whose impyetie all these sorrowes did fall vppon me you might be more warye and lesse wylfull in committing your fond dispositions to yong Mens fléeting discretions and in putting your trusty hope into their trothles hands And so in talking with you I shall perhappes oblige my selfe vnto you and in counselling you make my selfe vnbound or els admonishing you by these perplexed accidents allotted and befallen to me I shall helpe if not heale your amorous maladies I saie therefore good Ladies that with such diuers imaginations which you haue a little before comprised by my dyscourse I was continually molested when after more then a month past of his promised return I heard certain newes on a day of my beloued yong Gentleman and thus it was That going with a deuoute mind on a day to visit the sacred and religious places and to offer vp to the Godds some orysons for the release of my harde mishappes that restoring Panphilus to me again or els driuing him vtterly out of my minde I might recouer my banished comforte It came to passe that béeing in companie with manie wise and discrete Ladies some néerely allyed to me by blood and affinity and others conioyned to me by auncient familiaritie sette vpon pleasant discourses and in merry vaines there arriued by chaunce a Merchant who no otherwise then Vlisses Diomedes did to Deidamia beganne to shewe foorth his gems and precious Iewels and such especially as he thought most fine and fitting best the daintie mindes of such yong and curious Gentlewomen Who also as I gathered by his spéech and he béeing also demaunded of one of the companie saith that he was an inhabiter of that Cittie where my Panphilus was borne and dwelled But after hauing shown manie of his knacks and some of them bought of the Gentlewomen others prised and giuen him againe they entred into pleasant and merrie talke amongst themselues and whilst he did looke for his money one of them who was of a yong and florishing age of a most beautifull countenance and of noble blood commended of manie for her rare qualities and of moste for her courtlie and nice behauiour and the very selfe same Gentlewoman who had asked him before what hee was and from whence he came demaunded of him againe if hee had euer knowne one Signor Panphilo his countriman Oh howe much with these and many other demaunds did she please my humors and fulfill my like desires I was insooth greatlie gladde that they fell into such talke and did most willingly lift vppe my eares to heare the arguing of them bothe but especiallye to know the effect of his aunswers who without delay said And who is he that doth know him better then I doo To whom she said again striuing as it were and importunatly forcing her selfe to knowe what was become of him And where he is nowe Oh saide the Merchaunt it is a whyle since his Father hauing no more Children but him called him home vnto him whom the yong Gentlewoman yet asking againe How long is it since thou knewest any certaine newes of him Truely said hee neuer since I came from thence which is not yet I thinke full fiftéene daies Shee continued still enquiring and said And how dooth he nowe Very well said he it séemes for the verye same day that I came from thence I sawe a most fayre yong Gentlewoman with great solemnitie feast and ioy enter into his house which as I partly vnderstoode was newly married vnto him Whilst the Merchant was speaking these nipping words although I gaue a dolefull eare vnto them yet I stared the inquisitiue yong Gentlewoman stedfastly in the face maruayling with my selfe and imagining greatly in my minde what the occasiō might be that should mooue her to examine such straight perticulers and interrogatories of his estate Whome I woulde before this time haue beléeued that no other woman but my selfe had scarce knowne For I perceiued as soone as the sorrowfull wordes that Panphilus was maried came to her eares that casting her eyes down there appeared in her chéekes a red and hote coloure and that her prompt and ready
homicide shall quickly ensue And these pleasaunt yéeres which I desired so much to prolong shall be now cut of by thy vniust occasion Oh wicked man and worker of my woes tell mée nowe with what hart thou hast entertained thy new spouse with intent to be guyle her as thou hast doone to mée With what eies didest thou beholde her With those eyes that thou didest entrappe mée most miserable and credulous woman What fayth didest thou promise her that which thou didest so solemnelie sweare to mée to kéepe vncorrupted The thing that is once bound for euer can be bound no more why howe couldest thou doo it Doost thou not remember that the thing which is once bound cannot be bouÌ„d any more then once what Gods didest thou adiure Ah what periured Goddes Alas miserable woman I know not what Sirene slights and Cercian pleasures haue so bewitched thée that in knowing thyselfe to be mine thou shouldest tranforme thy selfe into so wicked a minde and sincke into the deceitfull gulfe of thy pleasing fantasies For what faulte alas did I deserue to be so smallie regarded of thée Whether is the great looue betwéene vs so sodainely flowen away Alas what wicked fortune dooth so miserably corrcte and oppresse dolefull creatures Thou hast nowe committed thy promised fidelitie to the windes and thy fayth also of thy right hand giuen me to the same the periured Gods by whose sacred Godheades with great desire or shewe thereof thou didest sweare to returne and thy flattering wordes wherewith thou wert very well stored and thy fained and forced teares with which thou didst not only hath thy chéekes but also mine all these I say lightly and rudely heaped one vpon an other thou hast rashly committed to the carelesse windes And now scornefully deriding me thou lyuest merrily with thy nowe mistresse Alas who would haue euer béeléeued that such vile and bitter gall had béene hidden in thy hunnied and flattering spéeches and such accursed disloyaltie in thy vnsuspected dealinges or would haue euer imagined that thy teares had béene with such deceiteful arte sent foorth Certes not I. How needfull it is to be merie trusting louers words But rather as thou didest séeme faythfully to speake them and no lesse sincerelie to lament so I did with assured integrity giue credite to thy wordes and teares And if peraduenture thou wilt affirme the contrarie and say that thy teares were true thy othes simply protested and thy faith giuen with a pure and vpright hart let it be graunted But what séemely excuse wilt thou alleadge for not performing them so entirely as thou didst promise Wilt thou saie that the entising beautie of thy new Ladie is the occasion thereof Why this wil be but a weake reason and a manifest note of thy inconstant minde And shall this be besides a sufficient satisfaction for my losse Alas no. The sinne is not pardoned vnlesse the thing which is taken away be restored againe O most wicked man was not the feruent looue which I bare thée sufficiently knowen vnto thée and yet woe is me therefore doo still beare thée against my will Alas yes Thou didst not therefore néede so great skill and such subtile wit to deceiue mée But because thou wouldest shewe thy selfe cunning in the highest degrée thou didest therefore vse all possible arte and malice in thy filed spéeches But boast not Panphilus of thy braue victorie goodlie conquest that thou hast got in deceiuing a simple and young woman and her especially who did put so great trust in thée My simplicitie did merite greater sincerenesse then thine was But what I beléeued the reuerende Goddes no lesse inuoked by thée then thy owne selfe The which with bended knees and bowed heart I pray that they would make this thy greatest part of thy eternall fame to haue deceiued a young Gentlewoman who looued thée more then her selfe It is a great shame to deceiue a young woman that looueth â—â—uely Ah Panphilus tell me nowe did I euer worke any thing against thy mind or was I at any time so oppugnaÌ„t to the féeding of thy humors wherby I deserued so stily to be affroÌ„ted and so iniuriously to be betrayed I neuer committed in sooth any other faulte against thée if this be a fault but when I did so foolishlye enamour my selfe of thée and did beare thée more then was due so great fayth and exteame looue But this offence did not deserue such accursed pennaunce in thy cruel conceite In one thing onely I know I haue too much fayled for dooing of which I haue iustly deserued the anger of the Goddes and this was to receiue thée wicked man and vile monster into my chast and then vndefiled bedde and in suffering thy naked side to lye so néere to mine Admit that I was not as they themselues did well perceiue and say but thou especially wert culpable of this crime who with thy bolde subtiltie and cunning practyses surprising mée alone and fast a sléepe in the darke and silent night as one who at other times was accustomed to deceiue me first taking mee softlie in thy armes my deare honour and vnstayned honesty being almost violated before I was thorowlie awaked what could I doo then alas when I perceiued this Should I haue cryed out and with my bootlesse clamours haue blotted my vndoubted vertue with perpetuall infamy and for thée Panphilus whome I euer looued more then my selfe procured a certaine and sodaine death I striued apace the Goddes knowe and with my feminine forces as much as I could resisted thy eger will which not able to controule béeing ouercome and my selfe wearied thou didst enioy thy gréedie praie O that that blacke day which did in course bring on this damned and wicked night had béene my last to haue ended in the same my vertuous and vnspotted lyfe with an honest and patient death How deerely honesty ought to be esteemed Oh how many bitter gréefs and what griping corsiues wyll assayle mée from hence forth and thou with thy Wedded wife wilt for thy owne pastime and to delyght her by one and one vnrip thy olde looues make mee myserable woman culpable in manie matters abasing my beautyes to commende and flatter hers and discommending my quallities to sette hers foorth the more Bothe which and all thinges else in mée were with highe prayse wonte to bée extolled of thee aboue all other womens in the world And all those vnspeakeable fauours which compelled by méere pittie and extreame looue I dyd so gently bestowe on thée thou wilt perhappes iniuriously affyrme that they sprong of whot and burning luste But amongest many other thinges which thou wilt vntruely declare remember disloyall Panphilus to speake of thy owne deceites by meanes of which thou mayest truely sweare and say that thou hast lefte mee in a lamentable and miserable estate And with these forgette not also to tell of thy receiued honours and infinite curtesies doone thée because thou mayest make thy ingratitude
loueth thée So if he did returne thou maiest be assured that hee were come not for thy sake but for the looue of some other woman Let him therefore remaine still there and from hence forth being farre from thée let him rather hold thy looue in doubtfull suspence then lyuing héere by contrarie examples and by to apparaunt demonstrations shewe that he dooth not looue thée at all And content thy selfe at the least that thou doost not remaine alone in these consuming paines and forsake not that comfort that miserable and distressed women when they haue companions in their miseries are wont to take It were too harde a taske for me good Ladyes to shewe with what incensed ire with what quantity of teares wyth what burning sighes and choaking sobs with what gryping gréefes of my poore hart and with what vehement and dolefull passions I was almost euerie day wont to meditate on these thoughts and to thinke of these matters But because euery hard thing in time is mollified and chaunged Euery hard thing wexeth soft in time it happened that hauing manie daies together ledde this kinde of life and not able to sincke any further into the Gulfe of gréefe then I was already fallen by little and little it began somewhat to relent And the more it departed from my affected soule the more was my feruent loue and lukewarme hope kindled there againe both which remayning in the place of my surceasing sorrowes made me chaunge my present wyl and alter my first desires of hauing my Panphilus againe and to deskant somewhat of his returne to mee againe And as euen now the dispayre of neuer enioying him again was most contrary to me in this so much the more did my repugnant desire of the contrary encrease And as kindled flames tossed abroade and blowne about with boysterous wyndes doo grow into greater flakes so Loue by contrary thoughtes in mee was not onely nourished but made of greater force Wherefore I was mooued with repentance of these foresaid frantick passions and superfluous spéeches And nowe considering well of that in my minde which vnbridled anger had prouoked me to say I was as much ashamed as if they thēselues hadde heard me And therefore I gentlie blamed that sencelesse rage which in the first assaults of it with so great force and furie dooth take holde of our blinde mindes that it doth not permit any trueth be it neuer so much apparaunt to be manifest vnto them But notwithstanding the more it is kindled the more in space of time it waxeth colde againe and doth make that afterwards cléerely known which rashly before it condemned in words and déedes Wherefore hauing recouered my right mind againe and after my sences were better setled I beganne thus to say O moste foolishe yonge Womanne wherefore dooest thou thus molest thy sefe Louers som times blame and sometimes excuse their beloued againe Wherfore without any certain occasion or knowledge dooest thou consume thy selfe in the heate and rage of thyne owne anger Saie that this is true that the Merchant tolde which perhaps is not and admit that hee hath marryed a wife is this so great a matter An inopinate thing indéede I must confesse which thou diddest not thinke woulde so soone fall out And yet it is most requisite that yong men in these causes must please and obey theyr Fathers willes For if his Father woulde haue it so with what face or coloure could he deny it And thou must also beléeue that moste of them that take wyues may loue them well and yet estéeme of others more And that the copious plentie which busibodied wiues yéelde to their quiet Husbands is an occasion of suddain cloying although they did neuer so much please and delight them in the beginning And what dost thou knowe how much or whither she doth content him or not Perhaps Panphilus tooke her by méere compulsion and louing thee more then euer he did her it is perhappes no small gréefe vnto him and doth thinke the time too long and tedious in beeing with her And if she please him thou maiest yet hope that she will quickly séeme vnpleasaunt and yrkesome vnto him And of his promised faith and religious oathes thou canst not truely with any reason accuse him because comming to thée againe he shall in thy Chamber fulfill the one and the other and what els he hath auowed to our mutuall and great ioy Haue therefore recourse to the Gods with prayers that Loue which is able to doo more then pledged oathes or pawned faith may mooue and make him returne to thée againe And besides this why shouldest thou haue any suspition of his disloyaltie perswaded thereunto by the troubled mynde only and altered countenaunce of the yong Gentlewoman Doost not thou know howe many yong Gentlemenne loue thée in vaine who if they knewe thée to bee Panphilus hys Mistresse could not chuse but bee greatly agréeued So must thou think it possible and no strange thing that hee is beloued again of many women who would be as sorowful as heauy to heare that of him which gréeued thée so much although for diuers occasiōs euery one might be especially discontent And in this maner forging sundry fancies with my selfe I came as it were again to my first hope And whereas I had before thundred forth many blasphemous curses against his dealings now with humble and milde petitions I entreated him and perswaded my selfe to the contrary Thus hope recouered once againe my tormented hart had not for all that any force to be merry but there appeared rather in my countenaunce signes of sorrowe and I felt in my minde a continuall molestation so that I knew not what to doo or how to thinke of these perplexities My first cares were fled away and in the first furie of my suddaine anger The conditions of angry louers of those that are ouercome with theyr passions I had in rage cast away all the stones which were memoriall testimonies of the ouerpassed daies and had burned all the Letters I receiued from him broken all his fauours and rent in péeces all his other trash I tooke no pleasure now to gaze vpō the heauen as she who was vncertaine and doubtful of his returne béeing thorowly perswaded of it before The desire that once I hadde to heare amorous hystories and tales and to passe the night away in such exercises was quite dead and the present time which had abbreuiated nowe the Sommer nights didde not graunt these thinges of which oftentimes eyther all or some great part I passed away without sléepe continually spending them in pittiful plaints and in sad cogitations And if I enioyed sometimes the benefite of swéete sléepe my fancies were neuertheles troubled and tossed about sundry dreames some of them séeming very ioyfull vnto me and some full of sorrow and care The resorting to publique places temples and feastes was yrkesome nowe vnto me and I did neuer or els very seldome when I
deceiued husband perceiued that all these drugges did helpe mee but a little or nothing at all hee being more tender and carefull of mée then I deserued by sundrye wayes and newe meanes endeuoured to purge me of this melancholick humour and to restore to mée my lost and former mirth but yet he laboured all in vaine Sometimes with comfortable wordes hee did assaie to chéere me vp saying There are swéete Ladie and my déerelie belooued wife as thou knowest well enough a little beyonde the pleasaunt hill of Falernus in the middest of olde Cuma Delectable places delectable Ilandes vpon the Sea coastes The situation of which is so swéet pleasaunt delightsome that the like I thinke is not vnder the coape of wyde heauen They are inuironed with most fayre hils full of all sortes of fruit and couered all ouer with gréene vines loaden with goodlie bunches of white redde and purple Grapes in the vallies of which there are no kinde of wilde beasts that may with pleasure be hunted but are to be found there Nor farre distaunt from thence there is a great playne full of game and fytte for all manner of flyghtes of praying and sollacing Hawkes There is the Ilande Pitycufa and Nisida abounding in Connies and the Sepulcher of great Mesenus leadinge awaie to the darke kyngdomes of Pluto There are Sibilla of Cuma her Oracles there is the Lake Auernus and the great Theator a common and auncyent place for many braue pastymes and rare spectacles There are swéet cléere Fishpondes the Hill Barbarus and the vayne and prodigall labours of the wicked Emperour Nero. All which delightes both olde and moderne cannot but greatly recreate mens mindes that neuer sawe them béefore Who for theyr pleasure and sollace goe many times to visite them And besides all this there are most healthfull and wholesome Bathes for men and women of all degrées and most swéete and goodlie ones for Ladies of honour and renowne And the ayre being verie temperate and pleasaunt there dooth continually aforde fitte tymes and good occasions and meanes to visite them There is no going thether without a merry minde nor abyding there without great feastes iollitie and pastime in such braue companies of noble men Ladyes Gentlewomen and fine and stately dames of this Cittie Wherefore I am determined that thy selfe not well as thou sayest in thy stomacke and troubled worse I feare in minde and as farre as I can gesse gréeued with déepe and melancolie passions for recouerie of eache sanitie againe shall goe thether with mée Which iourney shall not bée without great pleasure assured profitte and spéedy helpe vnto thy distempered bodie and sorrowfull minde But when I heard his words doubting least in the very middest of our sports and abroad there my déere Panphilus might returne and so might not perhappes sée him inflicted with inwarde gréefe I stayed a good while pawsing before I could answer him againe But after séeing his resolute pleasure imagining also that if he came he would séeke me out wheresoeuer I was I answered hym I was readie at his pleasure to goe whether and when he would And to bee shorte not manie dayes af-after we went thether Oh what contrarie medicines did my loouing husband excogitate and practyse for my helpelesse greefes Admitte that corporall langours were cured there yet verie sildome or neuer dyd any goe thether with a whole and sound mind that dyd returne with the same agayne whether it was the méere Situation of the place washed with the waues of the Sea the naturall place of Venus natiuitie or the time in which it is more vsed in spring tyde I meane as more fitte for those thinges that made it Neither is that truely to be maruailed at which often times appeared to me there That the most honest Gentlewomen and of best account deposing for a while theyr womenly modestie and shamefastnesse did vse in all their merrie méetinges and sportes an vnwoonted kinde of vnbrideled libertie and irrequisite familiaritie and did more lasciuiously assemble togeather in those places priuiledged perhappes for such wanton pastimes then any where else And I was not onely of this oppinion that with lesse stayne to theyr honours in those places in that companie at those times they might doo it but all those almost which were accustomed to resort to those Ilands thē as ful of mirth glée and feasts as Cypres or Cytherea were at what tyme their Ladies holidaies and diuine honours were celebrated there The greatest part of the time there was spent in ease and passed away sometime more in delightfull exercises not a fewe times in amorous discourses of Gentlewomen amongst themselues or else in company of young gentlemen and Gentlewomen altogether There were no viands but most delicious which were most deintie to be got Wine stirreth vp to Venery most noble precious olde the purest wines of force not onely to awake drousie Venus but to rayse vp to lyfe that vigour which is already mortified in any man or woman doo followe there And how much also the vertue of the bathes dooth conferre to the same they doo better knowe who haue sometimes prooued them There the coole Sea bankes and most pleasaunt gradens and euerie other place besides with diuers feastes with newe deuised sportes with most fyne and curious dauncinges with all kindes of musicall instrumentes and celestiall melodie and with amorous songes and Madrigalles made plaied and sung by those lusty youthes and swéet Nimphes did resound forth merueilous and pleasant Ecchoes Who is he therefore that can amongest so many entising pleasures there kéepe him selfe frée from Cupide his dartes who dooth without any paine or labor if I am not deceiued rule there as in the most principall place of all his kindomes and helped by so many fréendlie allectiues dooth with great ease against such willing and capable subiectes vse his strength and diuine forces Into such places most pittifull Ladies my husband was wont to carrie me to rid me of my amorous burning feuer Into which after that we were arriued looue vsed no other meanes towardes me then hee did towardes other but my soule rather which could not be wrapped in more strayght bondes of looue then it was somewhat though little enough cooler and by the long staying that Panphilus being from me had made and by many teares sustained gréefes was kindled into so great flames that I thought I had neuer felt the like before And this did not onely arise of the foresayd occasions but remembring with my selfe that I was often times there in Panphilus his companie both looue and grefe séeing my selfe without him did not a little encrease in my wounded heart I sawe not any Hill or Valley that I accompained sometimes of many and of him sometimes pitching their toiles for wild and sauage beasts sometimes leading houndes and learning water Spaniels and laying ginnes to entrappe and snare the sillie Foules of the Ayre sometimes bayting
hookes with Angle corde to choake the pretty and foolishe Fishes in cléere riuers and brookes and sometimes getting some and other sometimes missing of their purpose knew not and perceiued that these were euident testimonies of our mutuall pastaunce and glée Moreouer I did not sée any rocke shore or Ilande there but I sayd Héere was I with my Panphilus The like Petrarck vnfolded most finely in a certaine Sonnet this did he speake vnto me here this did we here Likewise there could be nothing else séene there which was not first an especiall occasion to me with great efficacy to remember him and with more feruent desire afterwardes to sée him either héere or else returned in any other place againe As it pleased therfore my déere hushand so there we beganne to take our delightes Sometimes rising vp betimes and so soone as cléere daie appeared and mounted vpon our swifte coursers and gentle Palfreies sometimes with houndes sometimes with hawkes and with both sometimes rominge vppe and downe into the néerest places and most aboundant for vollerie and venerie nowe thorowe the shadowed Woodes and nowe in the open féeldes we went earnestlie persuing our game And séeing manie goodlie chases and braue courses there reioycing euery ones heart to sée them did but a little or nothing dimnishing my sorrowfull thoughtes for when I sawe any fayre flyght or course therewith all I presently sayde O that thou werte héere Panphilus to sée this sporte as sometimes thou wert But alas hauing now vntill that poynt somewhat sustained and with lesse gréefe endured the beholding and with some small relaxation of my paines followed these pastimes by recording them nowe and thus in my minde ouercome as it were with secréet gréefe I left them abruptly of and let them all doo as they lysted for mée O howe many times doo I remember that in these imaginations my bended bowe and arrowes did fall out of my handes in handling of which in pitching of nettes and letting houndes goe or following them there was not anie Nimphe that waited one Diana her traine that did I thinke euer excell me And it fell out very often that manie times in my chéefest sporte of hawking like a carelesse woman and thinking of other greater matters I did let those hawkes that I caryed on my fist my selfe flowen as it were out of my wyts with sodaine flight to soare away of which pastime being in times past most studious Diuers pastimes bring to vnhappy loouers no pleasure at all and as much desirous and not halfe so carelesse to committe such faultes I dyd not only now take no regarde but founde no pleasure in them at all But after that euery valley hill and all the wyde plaines were thorowly trauersed vppe and downe and our companie laden with store of praye wée returned home to our pleasaunt Pauilions which often tymes wée found full of glée and myrth by reason of sundrie and diuers feastes made in them Sometimes afterwardes sitting vnder the hollow dens and entryes of hygh Rockes that did with their crooked bodyes ouerhange the Sea and with freshe ayre shadowing the Sandes where tables being set and furnished with sundrie sortes of meates in companie of many Ladyes and braue Gentlewomen wee made great cheere togeather From which againe we were not so soone risen but dyuers swéete instrumentes sounding melodious musicke the young Gentlemen and Gentlewomen in most braue order beganne to leade diuers stately and pleasaunt daunces in which I must néedes though against my will make one But because my melancolie minde was not delyghted with them and that the weakenesse of my bodie did also denie the same I daunced but a measure or two and satte me downe againe And with drawing my selfe behynd all the rest amongest the cloathes of Tapistrie and Arras that were spreade abroade and hung vp I secretly sayde to my selfe Where art thou nowe my Panphilus and so sat me downe againe amongest other Gentlewomen And in these places at the very same time giuing a willing eare to the skilfull musicke and the siluer soundes of of those instrumentes which with passing swéete notes entred déepely into my mynde and thinking of my Panphilus I dyd at one tyme couer and hyde discorde feasts and gréefe because listening to the pleasaunt noyse made euery demy deade spyrite of looue dyd regaine theyr former vigour and force in mée againe and the remembraunce of those merrie times dyd returne againe to my minde in whych the heauenly harmony of these instruments touched with rare skil was wont in presence of my Panphilus to worke diuers cōmendable and swéete effectes But séeing not my Panphilus there with most sorrowfull teares and sighes I would willinglye haue complayned on them if it hadde beene lawfull for me in that place And besides this the sundrie Sonnets sung of many young Gentlewomen there excéeding the Nightingales in sweete notes were wont in my ioyfull times to delight my happie minde of the which if there was any peraduenture that did please my melancolicke humanes I gaue most attentiue eare vnto the same and desiring greatly to haue it because rehearsing and singing it afterwardes to my selfe I might openly and with lesse susspect after a modest kind of sort learne couertly to mourne and secréetly to sorrowe with my selfe with those gréefes especially that were contained in it But after that the reiterated daunces and roundes had wearied the young Gentlewomen euery one beganne to place themselues amongst vs and as it was no rare thing there to sée the amorous young Gentlemen thronging about vs did encompasse vs in manner of a crowne whych thing neuer happened there or any where else that I perceiued but it made me call to minde that fatall day when Panphilus standing behinde a fayre knote of younge Gentlemen entrapped mée with the vertues of his diuine graces Wherfore I lifted vp myne eyes many times in vaine prying and looking betwéene them being fondlie perswaded by my foolish conceite that I should in lyke manner haue séene my Panphilus amongest them here Wherefore casting mine eyes sometimes amongst them I marked howe some of them with eger lookes and pyttifull glaunces dyd beholde the amiable obiectes of theyr chéefest desyres And my selfe waxed by this time very cunninge in those amorous daliaunces with a perplexed eye dyd viewe euery one and note euery thinge they dyd and perceyued well who looued in déede and who iested in demonstration sometymes commending one for the grace that hee obserued in hys discourse and sometymes an other for the prettie inuention hee vsed and for hys amorous argumentes so well couched togeather in his loouing stintes saying to my selfe After a known errour one wexeth wise at length that my miserable estate and cursed condition had béene much better if I had then plaid the counter fette as nowe they did reseruing thereby a frée soule to my selfe as with dallying and sporting they did kéepe to themselues Afterwardes refelling such an opinion I
sayd Nay I am rather content if in possessing an euill there is any cōtent at all to haue loued faithfully Returning therefore with mine eyes and thoughts to the wanton behauiour and amorous actions of these yonge Louers I reaped some small comforte by their sundry fancies And when I did perceiue that any of them didde loue more feruently then the rest I did more commend with my selfe such well meaning Louers And hauing thus a long time with an earnest minde behelde them I began softly to say with my selfe O thrise happy and fortunate are you who are not depriued of the sight and sence of your vnderstanding as I am Alas howe was I wont heretofore as you doo nowe to sollace my selfe with these indifferent recreations Long may you enioy your felicity since I alone must remaine an example of scorne and a patterne of myserie to all the worlde If Loue at the least making mee discontent with the thing beloued of mee shall bee an occasion to shorten my dayes then shall it followe that with a tragicall death as Eliza did I wil eternish my euerlasting fame and memory And hauing thus saide I helde my peace and went againe to note those countenaunces gestures actions with which these louing Nouices professed Louers No feast de lighteth where the thing beloued is not seene and retyred Souldiours did diuersly studie to please their dainty Ladies and Gentlewomen Oh how many haue I eftsoones séene in like places who after a great while hauing looked in euery place about for their desired ioyes and not séeing nor finding them déeming and reporting the feast not halfe so pleasaunt by reason of their absence nor so delightsome with halfe angry and very sad countenaunces haue gone from thence againe Wherevppon some little laughter although it was but féeble and weake in the middes of all my melancholye dumps was permitted to take place and a little comfort also graunted to them perceiuing that I had company in my sorrowes measuring in this sort by mine owne miseryes other mens mishaps Then thus disposed most déere Ladies as my words doo shew the delicate bathes the weary hunting and the Sea bancks hadde glutted my queasie minde with all kind of pastimes and cloyed it with superfluities of feasts Wherfore dismasking my old former countenance and discouering the smoake of my choaked sighes and the losse likewise of my appetite to my meate and sléepe to my deceiued Husbande and not caring to manifest to the appointed phisitions of my health these incurable infirmities bothe hée and they disparyring as it were with thēselues of my life we returned againe to the Cittie In the which the condition of the time preparing many and diuers feastes it framed also with thē diuers occasions of my manifolde gréefes wherfore it came many times to passe that to the solēnising of new espousalles I was especiallie also inuited as béeing by parentage néere of kinne to them or els by auncient familiaritie fréendship or neighbourhood acquainted otherwise with them To the which also my Husband oftentimes constrayned mee to goe thinking by these meanes to preuent the ordinarie course of my melancholy fits or els somwhat to ease my mind so greatly infested by them Wherupon I was at such times vrged to take again my forsaken ornaments and to put my neglected hayre iudged of all men before to shine like gold but not vnlike nowe to ashes in the finest order I could wherin I was not to learne howe to doo it And remēbring my selfe with a more déepe consideration Appassionated yong Gentlewomen care not how to adorne thēselues whom these fine thredd 's of gold besides all other beauties were wont to delight with a new froward passiō I did disturbe again my fantastical mind which made me somtimes so much forgett my selfe that I remember that no otherwise then called backe againe from a déepe sléepe or raysed out of an extasie taking vp again the combe that was fallen out of my handes I returned to my careles vnwilling office And taking some assured counsel in my Glasse of the setting foorth of these ornaments with which I had adorned my selfe And séeing my face to looke very pale and greatly dis-figured and déepely therewithall apprehending in my minde my lost and altered beautie I was almost in a doubt whither it was my face or no which I sawe in the Glasse but imagining rather that some infernall and hidious furie stoode by me turning my selfe about I did veryly thinke and feare that it was behind me But yet after that I was tricked vp very braue cleen contrary to the quallitie of my minde I went with other gentlewomen to those solemne sumptuous feasts in which raigned nothing but mirth ioy and all manner of mery and pleasant recreations Merrie I terme them in respecte of others because as he knoweth from whom nothing is hydde there was neuer any since the departure of my Panphilus which was not an occasion to me of most heauy chéere matter of continuall sorrowe Béeing therefore come to the places appoynted for the honors of such marriages although that in diuers places and at diuers times celebrated yet they neuer sawe me otherwise disposed then to remaine stil at one stay which was bearing a counterfette countenaunce of content and a fayned face as well as I coulde of merrynesse with my inward minde altogether occupied with subiects of sorrow deriuing the occasion of this sadnes gréefe as well from ioyfull and pleasaunt things which I sawe as from sorrowfull and vnpleasant passions which I felt But after that amongst other Ladies and Gentlewomen I was with great honor receiued my mind not intentiue vpō new fashions nor mine eies desirous to gaze vppon braue ritch attire wherwith al the place did shine but with a vain imagination deceiuing thēselues thinking perhaps to haue seene Panphilus there as oftentimes in like places they had doone before they went rolling vp down casting their beames in euery place round about and not séeing him as one nowe most assured of that of which I was at the firste probably perswaded like a woman confounded in mine owne foolish cōceit I sat me down with the rest of the Ladies refusing the profered curtesies and offered honors for whose sake he béeing now absent they were wont to be most déere vnto me And after that the new Bryde was come home and the magnificent pompe vsed at the Tables was ended and euery one with his passing daintie cates and heauenly Nectar bad chéered vp their frollicke mindes as diuers braue daunces sometimes directed by the tuned voyce of some cunning and singuler Musition and othersome ledde and footed by the sounde of diuers swéete instruments were begun euery place of the espousall house resounding with a generall applause of myrth and ioy my selfe because I would not be accounted coy and disdainful but ciuill rather in such an honorable assembly and well manered hauing gone somtimes about
with them I began to sitte mee downe incontinentlie againe entring still into newe and fantasticall imaginations Euery thīge refresheth the memory of the Louer of his sorpassed and happy life It came then to my minde howe solemne and glorious that feast was which like vnto this was once made in honor of my nuptiall ioy in the which béeing then but a simple soule in franticke loue matters and frée from melancholye passions as abounding in all ioy I sawe in my selfe wyth woorthy congratulations of euery one honourablye saluted and nobly entreated And cōparing those times with these and séeing them beyond all proportion altered I was wyth great desire if oportunitie of time and place had graunted prouoked to wéepe This swyft and suddaine thought didde runne also in my minde when I sawe the yong Gentlemen and Gentlewomen to reioyce equally together and to bee merry alike courting and deuising one with another sometimes with many pleasant and swéete discourses and sometimes with many singuler and prettie deuises fitte for such purposes howe that once I behelde my Panphilus in lyke places and howe in his company he and I all alone had passed the time there together and could not nowe doo the like And it gréeued me no lesse to sée my selfe depryued of the occasion of making such kind of ioy and enioying such content then I was sorrowfull for the pleasure which I loste by the not performance of the same But from thence applying my eares to amorous delights songs and sundry tunes and remembring those with my self that were passed I sighed and meruailous desirous to sée the ende of such tedious feastes béeing malecontent in the meane time and sorrowfull wyth my selfe I passed them away Notwithstanding beholding euery thing exactly the companies of yong Gentlemen béeing flocked about the Gentlewomen and Ladies that nowe were sette downe to rest them and retyred into diuers places to gaze on them I did perceiue well that many of them or almost all did sometimes ayme theyr beames at me and did talke secretly amongst themselues of diuers things touching my beautie brauery and behauiour but not so softlie but that by manifest hearing of my owne part or by imagination or hearesay of some others no smal part of their spéeches came to mine eares Some of them said one to another Diuers opinions and speeches of menne Alas behold that yong Gentlewoman who had not her paragon for beautie in our Cittie and sée nowe what an one she is become Dooest not thou sée how strangely she is altered and how appalled her once faire face is growne my selfe béeing as ignorant of the cause as amazed to sée the effects And hauing thus said looking on me with a most pittifull and milde eye as they who were greatly condolent of my gréefes going away left mee full of compassion and more pittious towards my selfe then I was wont to be Others didde enquire of one another amongst themselues saying Alas hath this Gentlewoman béene sicke And afterwards did answere themselues again saying It séemeth so because she is wexed so leane and pale Wherefore it is great pittie especiallye thinking of her former beautie that is nowe vaded quite away But there were some of a déeper reache then the reste whose true surmises greeued me very much after many gesses and spéeches amongst themselues saying The palenes of this yong Ladie is a manifest token of an enamored hart For what kind of infirmitie doth bring a Louer to a lower estate of bodie then the vnruly passions of feruent and hote affection She is vndoubtedly in loue And if it be so hée is too cruell and inhumaine that is the cause of such vnwoorthye consequences gréefe and cares I meane that make her looke with so pale and thinne chéekes When I had hearde these nipping wordes that rubbed vppe my festered wounde I coulde not with-holde my sighes perceiuing that others were more ready to pittie my miseries then he to preuent these mishaps who by greatest reason and most of all shoulde haue hadde compassion in his thanklesse harte And after I had fetcht manie déepe sighes with an humble and lowe voice I earnestlye besoughte the Gods that in lue of their kindnes towardes me they might haue better successe in their Loues And I remember again that the value of my honour and honestie was not small amongst some of them who in talking together did fauourably séeme to excuse the foresaide true surmises saying The Gods forbid that we should hatch such a thought in our minds to say that fonde Loue shoulde molest this wise modest yong Ladie or that blind affection could trouble her minde at all For she as she is endued with as great honestye as any other so was shee as it euer séemed neuer addicted to such vanities as many of her coequalles and hath not shewed at any time so much as a semblance of wanton boldnesse but continually arguments of wise and modest behauiour Nor amongst the diuers communications and companies of curious and inquisite Louers there could be neuer heard any spéech of her Loue Loue is a passion not supported any long time not once immagined amongst them which is so furious and forcible a passion that it will not bée anie long time concealed but will like restrained flames violently burst out vnawares Alas sayd I then to my selfe howe farre doo they roame from the truth not déeming me to be in loue because as it is the manner of fooles I make not my loue publicke to the view of euery one and preache it not openly abroade to bee secretely tossed from mouth to mouth as others vainly glorying in theirs are commonly wont to doo There came also sometimes oppositely before mee many yonge and noble Gentlemen proper men of personage of swéete and amiable countenaunces in euery thing gracious couragious and curteous and the chiefest flowers of our Cittie who often times before by many cunning meanes and drifts hadde to their vtmost of their power attempted and laboured to haue drawne but the deuotions of my eyes to the desires of theyr harts Who after that a certaine while they had séene mée so much deformed and altered from that I was wont to bée not wel pleased perhaps that I did not at the first frame my affections to their fancies disdayned now to looke at me and forsooke me saying The braue beautie of this Lady is gone and turned to a bleacke hew and the glory of her enflaming desires is nowe extincte Wherefore shall I hyde that from you fayre Ladies which dooth not onely gréeue mee to rehearse but generally all Women to heare I say therefore that although it was the greatest gréefe in the world to think that my Panphilus was not present for whose sake my then excellent beauty was most déere vnto me yet in such vpbraiding sort to heare that I had lost it it was no lesse then present death to my soule And besides all these things I remēber that béeing
sometimes inuited to such feastes I haue béene drawne perforce into the company of many pleasaunt Ladies diuersly discoursing amongst themselues of amorous conceits where with willing eare harkning what issue infinite Louers haue had in theyr hote passages I easily perceiued that there was neuer any of thē tormented wyth so feruent passions as I am nor their loue besette wyth so many miseryes nor contriued with such secrecy as mine was Although that of more happy fortunate Louers and of lesse honourable loues also the number is greater In this sort therefore sometimes eying and sometimes gyuing eare to that which was doone and spoken in these places like a pensiue and sadde Woman I passed away the weary time After that the Ladies and Gentlewomen had rested themselues a prettie while it happened that many braue yonge Gentlemen rysing vppe and amongst other Gentlewomen inuited me oftentimes to daunce but as often in vain went from me againe Who remaining neuerthelesse in theyr disports with mindes frée from heauy thoughtes and high intentions some mooued with desire to shew perhappes theyr greatest cunning and others pricked on thereunto by spurs of hote and burning loue but all very curious in the same my selfe sitting by my selfe alone with a scornefull minde and coy lookes didde marke the newe fashioned trickes the gesture and behauiour of many Gentlewomen there And certes I blamed some in my minde although I greatly desired if it might haue béene to doo as they did if my Panphilus had béen present there Who as oftentimes as his déere remembraunce came to my dolefull minde so often was it sufficient matter and the onely occasion of my new melancholie and fresh sorrowes and who dooth not as the Gods know deserue the great loue which continually I haue borne and yet doo still beare him But after that wyth no small griefe I had a great while beheld these daunces which with the suddaine sursaults of other gréeuous thoughtes séeming vnpleasaunt and tedious vnto mee vrged as it were with some other busines I rose vppe moste willingly from my place and to burst a sunder my heaped and swelling sorrowes whose open and suddaine discouery I greatly feared I gotte my selfe smoothly away into a sollitary secret place Greefe is reclaymed by lamentation and there giuing full scope and leaue to my flowing teares I acquited my foolish eyes for all the vanities that they had séene with an austere and due guerdō which were not distrayned from thē without many bitter wordes kindled with burning anger but knowing also my miserable fortune to be so cruell towards me I remember that somtimes I began thus to inueye against her saying The properties of Fortune O fearefull Fortune mortall ennemie to euery happye creature and onely hope of miserable menne Thou the suddaine chaunger of kingdoms and of mundane thinges doost as a helper with one hand lift vppe and as a destroyer wyth the selfe same throwe downe againe as thy indiscréete iudgment doth direct thy inconstant will not content to be wholy any ones exalting him aloft in one thing or els in an other casting him vtterly down or after that thou hast made him happy by any lent felicitie dost heape vpon his mynde new and vncouth cares because that worldly menne liuing in continuall want and néede may according to their vaine opinion their endlesse pride implore thy helpe and adore thy deity Yet art thou still blinde and deafe disdayning to behold the manifest miseries and refusing to lysten to the complaintes of miserable creatures triumphing onely with those whome thou hast vnworthely perhaps exalted Who embracing thy fréendly fauours and honouring thée with al theyr deuotions whilest with a smiling looke and flattering promise thou art entertaining them euen on a sodaine with some vnexpected accident or other finde themselues vtterly throwen downe by thée and then though to late doo miserablie perceiue how thou hast changed thy serene smiles into froward frownes Amongst the number of which my selfe wretched woman may be put who not knowing of my owne parte any mallice wrought against thée and ignoraunt of any heynous offence and indignitie whatsoeuer perpetrated by me against thée that might reduce thée to so seuere a reuenge am most vnworthely and pittifully punished Alas whosoeuer reposeth trust in great and mightie thinges and like a puissant Prince ruleth in high and stately pallaces applying alwaies his quiet and credulous mind to ioyfull and pleasaunt obiectes Let him cast his eyes vpon me and beholde howe from a high and renowmed Lady of felicity I am nowe become a most low and wretched handmaide of fortune and which is worse then this how cruelly I am reiected and disdained of the onely lord and maister of my subiected heart Ah Fortune thou diddest neuer giue any more effectuall example of thy vnconstant mutabilitie then my selfe if that with a perfect and sound minde my first latter condition of life be wel considered I was receiued of thée fickle fortune of thée false Fortune was I receiued into this world in abundant quantitie of goods if nobilitie riches honors dignitie be any parte of them which were moreouer by thy bountifull and large handes which thou diddest neuer yet withdrawe from them daylie and copiously augmented So that in sooth like a mightie Ladie I dyd continually possesse them as mutable thinges vse them and beyonde the common course of womens couetous nature did liberally imparte them to others But being ignoraunt Fortune that thou wert also the same which with vnequall passions and carefull thoughtes dyddest surcharge the minde and not knowing that thou haddest also a great portion in looue hys Signories I fell in looue as thou wouldest and with that young Gentleman whome thou onely and none else diddest then present béefore my wretched eyes when I thought my selfe farthest from any such daunger Whome after that with strong and intricate knottes thou dyddest perceiue that he was bound in the Circle of my heart thou hast vnstable and chaunging often times sought to worke my harme and wreake thy vndeserued iniuries vppon mée sometimes disturbing our linked myndes with vayne and deceytfull imaginations yea and sometimes our eyes with pittifull and publick glaunces because our looue made manifest might bée hurtfull vnto vs. And I am certayne that many times thou hast beene euen as thou wouldest thy selfe the onely cause that many displeasaunt and discrepaunt wordes of my belooued young Gentleman haue come to my eares and hast with myne of lyke consequence filled his againe able enough being credited to haue engendred hatred and discorde and to haue hazarded a sodaine mislike but their issue and thy driftes were neuer aunswerable to thy determinations Because admitte thou doost as a Goddesse gouerne all exteriour thinges as it pleaseth these the vertues of thy minde are neuer the more subiect to thy might That which fortune cānot bring to passe by right she dooth by worng Our wisedome hath continually gonne beyond thy wilinesse in
it selfe vnder which béeing most freshe for wynde and coole shadowes wée dyd many tymes sitte and passe away the heate of the day The fier of the minde dooth not receiue any refreshing or case by exteriour thinges These were alas especiall and chéefe remedies offered to mée to refrigerate the corporall heate of my bodie onelye but they lent mée not any newe ease of those neuer ceasing sorows and no extinguishment at all of those flames which burned my soule inwardlie but dyd rather bereaue mée of such néedefull helpes because the outward heate being now past which to delicate and tender bodyes is doubtlesse no small annoy by and by a more ample and fitte place was made for amorous and tedious thoughts which are not onelie the preseruing matter of Venus flames but a forcible substaunce augmenting the same Béeing therefore come to these places which wée hadde sought out and shrowding our selues vnder them for our refreshing and delight we went whether our mindes dyd leade vs vp and downe viewing héere and there this companie and that of young gentlemen and gentlewomen with goodly troopes of which euery little Rocke Banke and sandie shore which were by the shadowe of any hill defended from the scorching heate of the Sunne beames not otherwyse then a gréene Meddowe with fayre and plenteous flowers were almost al couered O what intensiue pleasure and how great a delight is this to thē that haue their hartes frée from the molesting passions of looue There might bée séene in many places fayre tables set and white and fyne Diaper clothes spred vpon them and all thinges so exquisitly doone and with such ornament magnificence glory cost that the very sight onely of them had sufficient force to prouoke any ones minde and appetite were it neuer so melancolicke demisse or drwsie but only mine which was to much soked in sorrowe There might in other places as cōuenient time did require diuers others haue béene séene how merelie they went to their morning repastes of whome our companie as wée dyd them againe with chéerefull countenances and curteous entreaties was inuited to theyr feastes and sportes But after that wée had as the rest also with great feastes banquetted our selues and after that the tables béeing taken away we had daunced certaine Neapolitane rounds and then after our accustomed manner had embarqued our selues againe wee went by and by rowing vppe and downe in this créeke and that Cliffe wherein certaine secrete and by places of the Sea shore to the gazing eyes of euery curious and wanton young Gentleman were shewed delightfull and desired sightes which was many fayre and young Gentlewomen stript into their Wastcoates of white Satten without sléeues and without hose or shooes swimming and sollacing themselues in the coole water And gathering Shel-fishe amongest these cliffes and harde rockes in stooping downe to take them vppe did often tymes discouer theyr round and snowe white balles of their delicate and fruitefull bodies And in some places againe there were others who with more subtile and with greater industrie with trammelles dragges flewes with all maner of nettes and diuers others that with angles to the great delight of the beholders and with manie newe deuises more and prettie artes deceiued the sillie and simple fishe But what néede I trouble my selfe to declare euery particuler pastime and pleasure which was practised and taken there Let them though they goe not thether at all imagine the lyke that haue exercised themselues or haue any vnderstanding in such thinges how many and of what force they are to recreate the minde And if they goe thether when they shall sée nothing else but mirth and sollace and all kind of youthfull disportes There the open mindes of euery one are frée from sorrowfull passions the occasions of the contrary béeing so manie and so great that there is scarce a deniall of any demaunde among them In these places I confesse because I would not séeme to bée deuoyde of curtesie and would not be troublesome to the whole companie I tooke a visarde of fayned mirth vpon mée though I was still sayling with contrarie blastes of tempestuous looue and enuious Fortune in those Seas of gréefes and cares in which since my Panphilus his departure I haue continually hulled vp and downe The greefe of the mind is hardly couered with a merry countenaunce Which thing howe harde it is to performe they that haue tryed it may giue sufficient testimonie thereof For howe could I be merry in mynde calling to mynde that I had sometimes séene Panphilus with mée and my selfe also without hym in lyke pastimes whome I did nowe by distaunce of many myles know to bée deuyded from me and besides this with out hope to sée him any more If I were not troubled with any other gréefe then onely care and vexation of minde which continually held me in suspence of many things was not this sufficient enough to haue confoūded my soule alone And can it otherwise bée thought because for as much as the feruent desyre that I had to sée him had so bereaued me of my true knowledge and vnderstanding that knowing assuredly that hée was not in those places yet as though he was there indéede I did argue in my minde and as if this had béene true without any contradiction I procéeded farther to sée whether I could espie him out or no. There was not any Boate Galley Shippe or Bregandine of all which the Sea coastes there was so full sayling foorth some comming in some casting and some waying Anker as the azure skye in a cléere and frosty night loaden with Golden stars which I dyd not first with myne eyes suruey and after by my seruauntes search out and knowe whether they went and from whence they came I neuer harde sound of any instrument although I knew him to be skilfull in onely one to the notes tune of which I did first giue an attentiue eare and didde after aske who he was that played on it imagining still that he might possibly be the same whom I did so carefully séeke after There was not any pleasaunt Rocke Coole shoare or shaddowed Caue which I had séene nor any company left vnuisited of me to sée if happily I might haue found him Certes I confesse that sometimes this vnfayned vain hope did abolish a great part of my sighes which sighes after that it was gone from mee amassed together in the concauitie of my braine Fiammetta her sighes turned into teares issued out of her eyes whose naturall issue was to haue béene breathed forth conuerted nowe into bitter brinish teares were by the conduits of my sorrowfull eyes powred foorth and so the counterfett ioyes were turned into confected and true anguish of mind Our pleasant Cittie surpassing all other Citties in Italie that are held famous for noble feastes royal shewes Naples doth not onely exhillirate her Cittizens with generous and solemne Nuptials refresh them with diuers
there in hell neuer so much tormented wyth endles payne that séeing these thinges coulde not but féele some respectiue ioy Why not one at all I think For they rauished with the swéetnesse of Orpheus his harpe forgotte for a time their cruell paines and torments But I sette in the mids of a thousand torments and placed amongst a thousande ioyes and continually exercised in many and sundrye kinds of sports cannot I say burie my gréefe in momentary obliuion nor asswage and lighten it be it neuer so little a while And put case that sometimes at those feastes such like I haue with an vnfained and true countenaunce hidde it and haue giuen respect to my tedious sighes in the night afterwards when I did finde my selfe all alone I did prolong not pardon any part of my teares but didde powre out rather so many of them as the day before I had spared and kept in scalding sighes And these thinges inducing mee to more pensiue and percing thoughts and especially in considering their vanities more apt and possible to hurte then to helpe as by proofe of them I doo manifestly knowe the feaste béeing finished and my selfe going from it and not wythout cause complayning and waxing angrye against these vayne shadowes and all other worldly showes I beganne thus to say Oh howe happy is that innocent man who dwelleth in the sollitarie village enioying onely the open ayre The prayse of a solitary life Who employing his sole care and labour to inuent subtill ginnes for simple beastes and to make nettes for vnwarie birdes with gréefe of mynde can neuer be wounded And if perhappes he suffer any great wearines in his body in casting him selfe downe vpon the gréene grasse incontinently he refresheth him selfe againe chaunging his place sometimes in the freshe riuer bankes and sometimes vnder the coole shadowe of some great woode where the chirping birdes with theyr prettie songes and the softe trembling of the greene leaues shaken by some pleasaunt and little wynde as staying themselues to harken to their siluer notes lull him swetlie a sléepe Ah Fortune haddest thou graunted me such a lyfe to whome thy desired giftes are but a cloging care and detriment it had béen better for me Alas how my high Palaces sumptuous beddes treasure and great familie any thing profitable and how little pleasaunt vnto me when my mind surcharged with ouer much anxyetie and wandring in vnknowen countries after Panphilus cannot haue any small rest nor when any comfortable respiration may be graūted to my wearied and breathlesse soule Oh howe delightfull and gratious a thing is it to presse the gréene and swéet bankes of the swift running riuers with a quiet and frée mind and vpon the naked turfes to fetche a sound and vnbroken sléepe which the glyding riuer with murmuringe bubles and pleasaunt noyse without feare dooth nourishe and maintaine These eases are without any grudge graunted to the poore inhabitaunt of the countrie village fréely to enioye and are a great deale more to bée desired then those toyes which with many flattering words I haue often times fawned on and haue with such dilligent and daily care embraced as the fine dames of the Citties vse commonly to doo and which at last with the carelesse coyle of the tumultuous familie or negligentlie broken His hunger if at any time perhappes it pricke him with geathering of Apples in the faythfull and secure woodes hée dooth driue away and manie young and tender herbes which the wyde Champaignes or little hilles of theyr owne frée will bring forth are also a most sauorie and swéete sustenaunce vnto him Oh in how many running brookes Christalyne fountaines and swéete waters lying downe all along may hee quench his thyrste and with the hollowe of his hande in cléere and streming riuers Ah wicked and pinching care of worldlings for whose sustentation nature dooth require but little dooth prepare light things We thinke with the infinite number and sundrie sorts of delicate vyandes to fill the gourmandise of our bodies and to please our queasie appetites not perceyuing at all that in them there lie hidden the very causes by meanes of which the ordinate humors and good bloode are euer more corrupted then nourished And how many times in cuppes of gold and siluer richlie garnished with gemmes and precious stones in stéede of swéete and delicious wines doo wée daily heare that colde and swelling poysonnes are tasted and doo howerly sée that in hotte wines and compound drinckes licentious vnbrideled and wicked lust is drunke and throwen headlong down Whereupon commonly they fall by meanes of these into a superfluous securitie which by wicked wordes or damned déedes dooth bringe to them a miserable lyfe or dooth paye them home with a most contemptible death seeing moreouer by daily proofe that these kinds of vnkinde beuerages make the drinkers bodies in a great deale worser Poeticall conceites and more miserable case then starke madde The Satires Faunes Driades Naiades and the Nimphes kéepe him faithfull and simple company Hée dooth not knowe what Venus dooth meane nor cannot skyll of her byformed Sonne And if hée dooth perhappes knowe her hee perceiueth her beautie to bee but base and little amyable Nowe alas would it had pleased the Goddes that I had lykewise neuer knowen it and that kéeping simple and playne company I had lyued a rusticall and rude lyfe to my selfe all alone Then should these vncurable gréefs haue béene far from me which I now sustaine and my soule The pompe of the world like to the winde together with my most holy name should not haue cared nor desired to see these worldly pompes and feastes lyke to the flying windes and vanishing smoke in the ayre nor if it had séene them should haue béene so full of anguishe and sorrowe as now it is The desire of hygh and princely towers of rich and sumptuous houses of great families and costly traynes of fayre and delicate beddes of shining cloathes of golde and siluer of pampered proude and swifte horses and of a thousand other superfluities of nature dooth neuer disturbe his temperate minde nor clogges his heart with buderning and burning care to kéepe them Not accompanied nor sought after of wicked men he dooth without feare liue in quiet and sequestred places and without séeking doubtfull rest in high and stately lodginges dooth demaunde onely the open ayre and light for his repose And of the manner of his lyfe the wyde firmament is a manyfest and continuall witnesse Oh how much is this life nowe a dayes vnknowen and lyke an enemie escheued and contemned of euery one whereas it should be rather as the déerest and swéetest content followed and embraced of all Truely I suppose that the fyrst age of the world lyued in this sorte which péese-meale brought foorth Goddes and men There is no lyfe alas more frée nor more deuoyde of vyce or better then this the which our first fathers enioyed and with which also he is this
day of all others best contented who abandoning the opulent and vicious Citties inhabyteth the priuate and peaceable woodes O what a worlde had it béene if Iupiter had neuer driuen Saturne a waie and if the Golden age had contynued styll vnder a chaste lawe because wée might all lyue like to our primitiue parentes of the first worlde Alas whosoeuer he be that dooth this day obserue the first and auncient riches euen he I say is not inflamed with the blynde rage of haplesse and helplesse Venus as I am nor he who hath resolued with hym selfe to dwell in Woodes hilles or dales was euer subiect to any carefull kingdome not to the wauering wynde of the vnconstant populare not to the suffrages oppinions and censures of the trothlesse common people not the infectious plagues and enuious pestilences nor to the frayle fauour also of blind and inconsiderate Fortune in all which my selfe hauing put to much trust looue and studie in the middest of the waters like Tantalus doo dye with endlesse thirste To little thinges great rest is aforded although it bee a harde matter without the greater to be able to sustaine the lyfe But he whose thoughts are turmoyled about great thinges or dooth desire to ouerrule great matters the same man I say dooth euermore followe the vaine honours of vading riches What they are that follow riches And highe styles and magnificent titles please for the most part false and deceytfull men But he is frée from feare and doubt and can not decerne of the malicious man swelling in rancour cancred enuie nor of the backbiter by his venemous tongue and viperous téeth who dwelleth in the simple and solitarie woodes and féelds And is also ignoraunt of the sundrie hatreds and incurable woundes of looue and the abhominable sinnes of the people committed one against an other in the Citties and liueth without feare of breach of lawes and cléere of suspicion to be guiltie of ryottes and mutinies and beateth not his branes to forge fayned tales and to vse deceitfull wordes which are notes to entrappe men of pure faith and playne dealing But the other while he is alofte is neuer without feare or perrill suspecting continually the verie same sword that he weareth by his side Oh how good a thing is it to resist naked and lying vpon the ground securelie to take his sustenaunce Neuer or seldome at all did capitall or great sinnes enter into little cotages At the first there was no care taken for golde nor the holy stone nor God Terminus was set a bounde or Arbyter to deuyde féeldes from féeldes and seueralles from commons With tall and stout shippes they plowed not the vnknowen waues of the Sea but euery one dyd knowe his proper coastes and bankes Nor with stronge piles of timber with déepe ditches high walles strong bulwarkes and rampires dyd they fortifie and compasse about the sides of theyr Citties nor cruell weapons and rustie armour were scoured vp and made readie to fight or borne of warriers in those daies neither had they any Enginnes or deuellishe deuises which with great pittie might ruinate stonie walles and breake Iron gates in péeces And if there was perhappes amongest them any little warre with naked brest and vnarmed arme they fought it out in which the broken bowes of trées and stones serued them for theyr weapons and pellets Nor the fine and light speare of horne was armed with Iron nor the stabbing dagger trenching sworde and murdering rapyer were gyrt to any of theyr backes or side Nor the bushy crest and prowd plume of colloured wauing feathers dyd adorne the glittering helmettes and that which in theyr happy daies was the happyest thing of all was that Cupid was not yet borne whereby the chast mynds violated afterwards with his poysoned dartes when he first began to flie with swifte winges thorowe the worlde might liue securely and frée from all tormenting thoughtes Ah I would the Gods had giuen mée to such a world the people whereof content with a little and fearing nothing followed onely their wilde and and sauadge appetites And that of so many great goods and felicities that they enioyed I had not possessed any other then not be molested with so gréeuous looue nor to féele so many smootheringe sighes as now I am do now féele then should I haue liued a more happy life then now I do in this present age ful of so many poisoned pleasures vnprofitable ornāents shadowed pompe Alas that the wicked furie of gaine auarice Mutations of ages that headlong and enraged wrath and that those mindes which of themselues kindled lothsome luste and voilated these first bondes so holy and easie to be kept giuen of nature her selfe to her people And that the thyrst after rule a bloodie Sunne came nowe in place and that the weaker became a pray to the greater and more mightie Sardanapalus came nowe in and first of all made Venus though of Semiramis it was made more dissolute more deintie and delicate and then to Bacchus and Ceres prescribed new orders and customes neuer knowen of them before Then came in also warlike Mars who found out newe sleights and a thousand mortall wayes to death And then al the world beganne to be contaminated with blacke goare and the Sea to be tainted with redde riuers of bloode running into it Then most wicked crymes entred into euerie one his house in bréefe there was no great or detestable sin perpetrated without some former and foule example before Brother killed brother the father the sonne and the sonne the father The husband lay slaine for the faulte and many times by the proper facte of his wife And wicked mothers destroyed daily their owne fruite The infinite crueltie and endlesse enuie of stepdames whych continuallie secréetelie or openlie they beare to their husbandes children I neede not to alleadge because theyr effectes are manyfestlie séene at all times and places Ritches therefore brought Pryde Auarice Lecherie Wrath Gluttonie Enuie and Slothe and euery other vyce with them Looue the worker of all mischefe And with these aforesayd Fiendes the Captayne and worker of all mischéefe and the onely artificer of all sinnes entred also dissolute and vnbrydeled Looue I meane by whose continuall sieges layde to myserable myndes infinite Citties ruinated and burnte doo yet smoake and for whome all nations haue made mortall vprores and doo yet broyle in the lamentable and endlesse warres And the ouerwhelmed and drowned kingdomes by his cruell tyrannie doo yet oppresse many people And concealing all his other execrable effectes let those onely which hée vseth towardes mée suffise for a manyfest example of his mercilesse mischéefe and crueltie which doo so sharpely enuironne me on euery side that I cannot turne my minde to no other thing but onely to the gréeuous obiectes of hys immanitie Discoursing thus with my selfe sometimes I thought that that which I dyd was wicked in the sight of the iust Gods and
gaue them a good president and patterne of better life It is a great gréefe you knowe for mee to tell a lye and with what an vnpatient and troubled minde I tell this forced and forged tale you knowe to well and I can doo no more Oh howe many times faire Ladies for this iniquitie haue I receiued pittifull prayses of the Gentlewomen sytting about me saying that of a most vaine woman I was become a most deuoute conuertite How hard a thing is it to iudg of anothers holines Truely I vnderstood many times that there were some of them of this opinion that I was so highly in the Gods fauour that there was nothing that I could craue at their hands but I might easily obtaine the same of them And therfore I was many times visited of holie women for a zealous and deuoute one also they béeing poore soules as much deceiued in that which with my sorrowfull and subtill countenaunce I did hide in my minde as ignorant how discrepant my feruent desires and my fayned deuotions were O deceitfull world how much can counterfet lookes preuaile in thée more then iust and well meaning mindes if that their works be hidden an secrete My selfe a greater sinner then anye other and sorrowfull for my dishonest loues yet couching them vnder the Vayle of honeste wordes am reputed holie But the iuste Goddes knowe that if I could without daunger of my honour and good name with true reports I would make satisfaction to euerie one whom in fictions spéeches and gesture I haue deluded and woulde not hide the headspringe from whēce such streames of teares did flow nor the course from whence the effects of my sorrowfull life are deriued But alas it may not bee When I had answered her who first demaunded of mée the cause of my melancholie an other sitting next vnto mee séeing my teares almost dried vp said Gracious Fiammetta whether is the shyning beautie of thy faire face gone and howe is the liuely colour of thy rosie chéekes extinct what is the cause of thy pale and wanne visage Thy twinckling eyes like to morning starres are dimmed nowe with blew and purple circles that compasse them about and are so déeply suncke into thy browes that scarcely they may bee discerned in thy forhead Thy golden tresses once so brauely adorned with curious hand heretofore why nowe tyed vppe diffusedlie and scarcely are they séene Tell mee Fiammetta Beauty is but a fraile thing For thou makest me too maruaile without ende And her I answered in fewe wordes thus It is a manifest thing that humaine beautie is but a vading flowre and that euery day and houre it waxeth lesse and lesse which if it hath any trust in it selfe at length doth perceiue it selfe to bee but nothing and to lie miserably prostrate He that gaue it me submitming me the occasion of expelling it againe with a dul pace hath taken it from me The vppermost attire of Italian Spanish Ladies and Gentlewomenne is a fine blacke mantle of silke or Saye vpon their other garments which couereth thē from the hand to the feete possibly perhaps to restore to mee againe whensoeuer it shall please him And this béeing sayd not able to with-hold my teares shrouded vnder my mantle I shed them aboundauntly And with these words I lamented with my selfe saying O beautye the vncertaine Iewell of mortall menne and the gyft of a lyttle time which dooth bothe come and goe sooner away then the pleasaunt Meddowes depainted with many flowres in the swéetest seasonnes of gladsome Springtide and the verdure of high Trées apparrelled with sundry leaues which are no sooner for a little time adorned with the vertue of Aries but immediatly with the hote exhalations and vapours of parching Sommer are consumed and taken away againe And if perhaps the burning season doth leaue any of them vntouched Autume dooth not spare to leaue them naked and bare Euen so thou beautie moste often in the middest of thy prime and best yéeres iniured by many accidents dost perrish which if perhaps they be pardoned thée in youth the riper age though with all thy force and meanes thou dooest oppose to preserue the same dooth take it quite away Oh beautie thou art but a flying and inconstant thing and not vnlike to the waters which neuer returne more to their first fountaines and no hope in changing and brittle goods and therefore lesse affiance should bee put Alas howe did I once loue thée and howe déere werte thou to mee miserable woman and with what care werte thou nourished and kept of me But nowe and deseruedly I curse thée beautie For thou art the first occasion of my lost libertie the first entrapper of my déere Panphilus his soule enioying him haste not sufficient force to kéepe him still And hee béeing nowe gone haste not the power or vertue to call him backe againe If thou haddest not béene I hadde not séemed pleasant to Panphilus his louely eies and not hauing pleased them he shoulde haue neuer sought to allure myne and not entysing and pleasing them as he did I shoulde not nowe sustaine these paines of minde Thou art therefore the onely occasion and beginning of all my hurt Oh thrise happy are those Women who without thée suffer the rebukefull checks of rude and rusticall behauiour and are contemned for their foule and ill fauoured hewe because they obseruing Dianas chaste and holy lawes and seldome troubled with pricking motions as well deuoide of péeuish passions of their owne parts as not fearing the forcible assaultes of fonde sutors may liue with their soules frée from the cruell signorie and tyrannie of loue But thou the onely occasion of receiuing continual molestation by them who neuer leaue to gaze on vs dooest by their importunacie of force entice vs to breake that which we should most déerely obserue O happy Spurina and worthy of eternall memory who knowing thy effects and vnlawfull affections in the flower of her youth with cruell hand did kill thée in her breaste rather choosing to be of the wyser beloued for her vertuous act then of wanton youthes for her concupiscible beauty Alas if I had doone so all these griefes all these thoughts these teares should haue neuer thus molested my tender hart and my nowe corrupted life shoulde haue yet remained within the compasse of her first laudable bonds Héereat the Gentlewomen pulled mee againe and blamed my superfluous teares saying Oh Fiammetta None must dispaire in Gods mercie what myserie is this doost thou despayre of the mercy of the Gods Doost not thou beléeue that they doo pittifully forgiue the greatest offences wtout shedding of so many teares This course which thou doost take in hand is rather the way to séeke thy owne death then pardon for thy faults Ryse vppe therefore and wipe thy face and beholde the sacrifice which the sacred Ministers of Iupiter are carrying to offer vp to his mightye Godhead At these wordes stopping my teares I
them had they not béen mortall But I thinking onely of those vnluckie tydinges which I had hearde to one of you Gentlewomen to which I know not I sodainely became an open enemie and I began to reuolue great gréeuous matters in my perplexed minde And that amassed lumpe of gréefe which could not altogether containe it selfe in my breast with a furious and despitefull voyce I did in this sorte partly driue out of me saying O wicked and false young man O enemie to pittie and pittilesse wretch O Panphilus the worst of all those who with out deserte dooth breath this common ayre Disloyall Panphilus who hauing blotted me most miserable woman out of thy vngratefull memorie doost nowe dwell and delight thy selfe with thy newe deceitfull dame Accursed bee that haplesse day when fyrst I sawe thée and that fatall hower and very instant in whych thou diddest please my simple eyes Accursed be that Goddesse which appearing to mee with her allured promyses flattered my waueringe minde and disturbed the same though resisting with all her forces to the contrarie from the boundes of my right iudgement to lyke of thée wicked wretch and vngratefull monster to looue thée Certes I thinke that shee was not Venus but rather some infernall furie in her shape striking mee with madnesse and filling me with franticke furie as once she did miserable Atamas O most cruell youth whome amongst manie other most noble beautiful and valiaunt young Gentlemen I dyd fondly chuse out for the best where are nowe thy serious prayers which for safetie of thy life with teares thou diddest often tymes offer vnto me affirming that both that and thy death weare in my handes Where are nowe thy pittifull lookes and those two neuer dryed eyes with the which malicious man thou dyddest neuer cease at thy pleasure to shedde foorth teares in my presence Where is nowe the great looue that so brauely thou diddest fayne to shewe me Where are thy swéete wordes and thy sower gréefes thy infinite sorrowes thy paynes and trauels proffered and imployed in my seruice Are all these slyd out of thy memorie or hast thou framed them a new to entrap thy deceiued and newe loouer Accursed be that pittie of mine which tooke that life out of death his mouth that thereby making her selfe thē a ioyfull woman should haue rather sent it to the darkesome denne of death Nowe those eyes which whilome in my presence lamented laugh before their newe Mistresse and that mutable heart hath turned all his swéete wordes and faire offers to her onely and nowe hast thou hereticallie dedicated all thy seruices to her deuotions Alas Panphilus where are nowe those profaned and periured Godheades Where is thy promised fayth Where are thy infinit teares of the which miserable woman I drunke no small quantitie beléeuing them to bee tempered then with as great pittie and looue as now they are turned but to droppes of treacherous deceite All those placed in the bosome of thy newe Mistresse thou hast with thy selfe taken from me Alas how great a corsiue was it to my poore hart when once before I heard that by Iunos lawe thou werte combined to an other woman But perceiuing that the couenauntes in which thou didest binde thy selfe to me were not to be preferred before them although I did painefullie beare it yet ouercome with iust grefe I did with lesse anguish of minde endure it It is a great greefe that that which dooth iustly belong to one should vniustly be an others But now vnderstanding that by the self same lawes by the which thou wert boūd to me thou hast in casting me of giuē thy selfe to an other it is an vntollerable paine for me to sustaine But now I knowe the cause of thy stay openly perceiue my own simplicity with the which I euer beléeued that thou wouldest if possiblie haue once returned againe Alas Panphilus diddest thou stand in nede of so many guilefull artes and cunninge fetches to delude me Why diddest thou so often so solemnlie and so highlie sweare vnto mée with continuall asseueration of thy most entyre and sincere faith if thou diddest thinke thus to deceiue me Wherfore diddest not thou goe away without taking thy leaue or without making any promise of thy returne I did as thou knowest most feruentlie looue thée and thou wert not then so much entangled in my looue werte not so straightly my prisoner but at thy will as to my no small paine I now perceiue thou hast doone and without wasting such infinite and vaine teares thou mightest haue departed from me If thou haddest doon thus then I should without doubt haue sodainely dispaired of thy returne manifestlie knowing thy deceite and then with death ere this time or ese with iust obliuion my tormentes should haue béene concluded But because they might be the more prolonged in giuing me a little vaine hope thou hast continuated and nourished them still But I poore soule neuer deserued this at thy wicked handes Alas how swéete were thy salte teares to me but nowe knowing their vile effects I féele thē to be most bitter to my dying minde Alas if looue did so strongly rule in thée as he dooth féercelie vse his might and signorie in me tell me then if it was not sufficient for thée to be once captiuated but that the second time thou must fall into his forces againe But what doo I talke of looue For thou didst neuer looue but hast rather delighted to iest with young gentlewomen and hast made it but a sport to deceiue which thy subtilty their simplicity If thou had'st loued as I did beléeue thou did'st thou shouldest yet haue béene mine own And whose couldest thou haue béene that had looued thée more then I Alas what dame so euer thou be that hast taken him from me though thou art my mortall and onely enemie yet féeling the great gréefe which his falshood hath engēdred in my breast I must néedes take pittie on thée He that deceiueth once deceiueth euer Wherfore I warne thée to take héede of his deceites because he that hath once deceiued hath for euer after lost his honesty and shame and dooth make it no matter of conscience to deceiue euery one from thence foorth Alas wicked youth how many orisons and sacrifices haue I offered vp to the Gods for thy safetie and now thou must flie from mée to goe to an other O Goddes my praiers I perceiue are hearde but to the profitte of an other woman I haue the sorrowe and an other suckes the swéete I reape but dole and paine for my long deuotions and an other delight and pleasure of him who in right and equitie should be mine Ah wicked man was not my beauty correspondent to thy brauery my dooinges to thy desires and my nobilitie to thy Gentilitie Alas a great deale more Were my riches euer denied thée or dyd I take any of thine Ah neuer Did I euer in déede or demonstration looue any man besides thy selfe
cleaued almost a sunder with vnspeakable gréefe and perceiuing my Louer to bee farre from mee like a desperate and franticke Womanne I beganne thus to say to my selfe Behold the very selfe and same occasion which Sidonian Eliza had to abandon this hatefull world cruell Panphilus hath giuen me And alas a great deale worse It pleaseth him that forsaking these I séeke out other regions And since I am become his subiect I will fulfill his hard beheste and pitty-les pleasure and in one howre I will requite my haplesse loue my committed wickednesse and my iniuried and déere husband with a tragicall and vnnaturall death And if oppressed soules deliuered out of thys corporall prysonne haue any liberty in the newe world I wyll without delay conioyne mine with hys And where my body cannot bee my soule shall supplye the place of it Beholde therefore I wyll die and so rydde me of all these paines I thinke it most conuenient that with these handes I execute this last stratageme vpon my selfe Because there can be no other hande so cruell that can perfectly performe that which iustly I haue deserued I wyll therefore without delay willingly take my death the remembraunce of which although it be terrible to my weake sexe and to my womanly thoughts yet shall it be as welcome vnto me as this painfull life is yrkesome vnto my soule And after that I had resolued vppon this last pretence I began to deuise with my selfe which was of a thousande wayes the best to take my life from me And first of all colde and sharpe yrons came to my minde the mortall meanes of many one hys vntimely death considering that the said Eliza by their cruelty did forsake thys cōmon ayre and then after these the deathes of Biblis and Amata were presented before mine eyes the manner of which was offered to mee to ende my weary life But more carefull of my honor and good name then chary of my selfe and fearing more the maner of dying then death it selfe the one séeming vnto me very infamous and the other too extreame cruell in the mouthes and mindes of euery one were occasions to make me refuse the one and not to like of the other Afterwards I imagined to doo as the Sagontines and as those of Abydas dyd the first fearing Hanniball of Carthage and the other Phillip of Macedon committing themselues and all theyr goods to the fury of consuming flames But knowing that thys coulde be no small detriment to my déere Husbande vnculpable and guiltlesse of my euils I refused also this kinde of death as I did the rest before After these I called to mind the venimous iuyces which héeretofore assigned to Socrates to Sophonisba to Hanniball and to many other Princes more their last daies And many of these indéede as they pleased my changable fancie so did I thinke them fitte for the purpose But perceiuing that in going about to séeke them no little time was requisite and doubting leaste by enquirie of them my drifts shoulde bee called in question and sifted out and that my determined purpose also in the meane while might perhaps haue béene altered I imagined to séeke out some other kinds of death Wherefore I bethought me as many times I had doone before to yéelde vppe my féeble spirits betwéene my knées but doubting least it should be known and suspecting some other impediment incident to it I passed to other headlong thoughts And the very same occasion and least I should be also séene made me forsake the burning and swalowed coales of Portia But the death of Ino and of Melicer ta likewise the hunger starued ende of Erisichthone occurring to my memory the long time that I should haue in executing the one and in staying for the other made me also to reiect them thinking that the paine of the laste did a greate while nourishe the languishing body But besides all these wayes the precipitate death of Perdix falling frō the highest Towre of Creete came also to my minde which spéedie kind of death onely pleased me infalliblie to followe as one deuoide of all insuing infamie saying to my selfe Casting my selfe downe from the highest Turrets of my Pallace I shall crush my boanes in a hundred péeces and dashe out my braines and by all those seuerall péeces will yéelde vppe my haplesse soule contaminated with prepared goare and ready broken vp to be offered vppe as a Sacrifice to the Gods And fewe or none there are that will imagine and say that by mine owne cruelty furie or proper will this death besell vnto me but imputing it rather to some vnlucky chaunce with powring out pittifull teares for mee will bewayle my vntimelie death and curse my froward Fortune This deliberation therefore tooke place in my mind and it liked me especiallie to put the same in practise thinking to haue vsed great pittie towards me if I had perhaps become pittilesse and cruell against mine owne selfe This determination therefore had now taken sure roote in my hart and I did not attend for any thing els but fitte time Wicked thoughts euer warre with good when a chillie cold suddainly entring into all my boanes made me tremble for very feare which brought these words with it saying O miserable Woman what dooest thou intende to doo Wylt thou ouercome with madde anger in a senceles rage fury cast thy selfe away If thou wert nowe constrained to die of some gréeuous infirmitie wouldest not thou alas endeuour and séeke to liue because at the length thou mightest sée thy Panphilus once more before thy death Dost not thou thinke that when thou art deade thou shall neuer sée him againe and that no kinde of pittie that hee may vse in thy behalfe may helpe thée any thing at all For what did the slacke returne of Demophoon profitte vnpatient and strangled Phillis She florishing without any delighte felt his comming which if she could haue staied for he might haue found her still a Woman as he left her and not a Trée Liue therfore Fiammetta for he will yet for all this returning as a fréende or as an enemie at length come to thée againe And with what disposed minde soeuer he returne thou canst not choose but loue him still And perhaps thou shalt sée him talk with him and mooue his vnconstant and harde harte to compassion of thy woefull plightes Hee is not made of sturdye Oake nor of Flinty stone nor borne bredde nor nourished in a hollow Caue amongst wylde Beastes and did neuer sucke the milke of Tygres nor drinke any other sauage and cruell beastes blood neither is his hart made of Diamonde or of stéele and is not of so brutishe and rusticall inclination but that he will lend his eares and bende his hart to my pittifull plaints passions and perswasions and take some remorse of coequall commiseration of my sustained sorrowes But if he will not be ouercome with pittie then wearyed of thy lothsome life it shall be more lawfull for
in whose poynts and edges consisteth the onely hope of my desires Or els strangling cordes lothsome and swelling poysons mortiferous hearbs choaking ryuers burning coales and consuming flames What doth this vigilant care auaile thée anie more but to prolong a little this yrkesome life and to reserue it to that kinde of death which euen nowe without touch or staine of infamie might haue set peace to my afflicted soule which by thy pittilesse interruptions deferred thou shalt doubtlesse at one time or other make most infamous vnto al the worlde and moste shamefull vnto mee Because death is in euerye place and consisteth in euery thing Let me therefore nowe die least growing to a more gréeuous condition of life with a more inhumaine minde and cruell hand I prepare for my selfe the most miserable and cruell death that may be Whylst wretched Womanne I spake these wordes I coulde not keepe my handes styll but sometimes fallinge on one Seruaunt and sometimes on an other catching some by theyr locks I pulled the heayre from theyr heade and fastening my nayles in the faces of other some I made the bloode to spynne out of theyr cheekes tearynge from othersome their poore garments from theyr backs But alas neither the olde Nurce nor the mangled seruauntes aunswered me one word againe but lamenting my sencelesse actions executed their pittious functions towardes me whom then with gentle wordes and entreties I endeuoured to gaine to my will which serued my turne nothing at all Wherefore lyke a franticke Hecuba making a great noyse and with outragious spéeches I beganne to exclaime saying O wicked handes and prone to al mischéefe you the adorners of my hurtfull beauties were a great occasion to make me become such an one as to séeme so fayre and pleasing in his eyes that I was desired of him whome I looue most of all Since therefore these euilles haue spronge by your helpe in guerdon of this vse now your wicked crueltie vpon my accursed body Rent it in péeces and open it and diued in my hotte blood pull out from my accursed bodie my miserable heart and inexpugnable soule Teare out I say this false hart wounded with blind looue And since that all meanes of mortall and murdering instrumentes are taken from thée with these reuenging fingers the adorners of my banefull beauties and with these sharpe nayles péece-meale dismember and without remorce of pittie rent it out Alas that my bootelesse spéeches did menace and promise me desired euilles and commended them to the execution of willing handes but the vigilant care of the prying seruantes béeing alwaies ready to the hinderaunce of them withhelde them against my will And the mournefull and importunate Nurce with dolefull speeches after all this beganne thus to say Affectionate comforts O déerest daughter by these miserable breasts which were the scources of thy alimentes I humbly pray thée that with a quiet and appeased minde thou wouldest giue eare to my wordes By them I will labour to mittigate thy passions that thou shalt not sorrow any more or to driue quite away perhapes from thée the blinde anger that dooth incend thée to this kinde of furie or else with a more remisse and calme minde to make thée suffer the same or else spéedely to forsake it Wishing thée to reduce that to thy erred memory that shall reuiue thée and be no smal health and great honour vnto thée It is therefore expedient for thée good Ladie most famous for so rare vertues as thou art endued with al the gifts of nature and fortune not to be subiect to pinching sorrow nor as a woman ouer-come to turne thy backe from daring dollours from threatning mishappes and from persuinge woes It is not a poynt of vertue to require death and to call vpon it nor a parte of magnanimitie to be afraide of life It is not vertue to desire death and to be afraid of life as thou art but rather to countermaund pressing euilles and to flie away before them is not the part of couragious and resolute mindes Whosoeuer dooth abate his destinies and dooth contemne deuide and cast from him the profittes pleasures contentes and goodes of his life as thou hast don I knowe not what néede he hath to séeke death and cannot tell why he feareth life since that the one and the other is a will of a timerous persō Now if into the darke dungeon of extreame misery thou doost desire wil-fully to cast thy selfe séeke not death because this is the last expeller and extinguisher of it Let this foolish fury fly out of thy mind by the which mée thinketh thou doost séeke both to haue and to lose thy loouer Why doost thou beléeue by béeing dissolued into nothing to get him againe To whom I aunswered not a word But there was such a rumour spread thorow out the wide house thorow out the Cittie and country rounde about that all my seruauntes no otherwise then at the howling of some hungrie woolfe all the néerest inhabitauntes are woont to méete together came running to me from euerie place and all of them afrighted with sodaine sorrow demanded what the matter was But I had already forbidden them that knew it to tell any thing at all Wherefore couering the horrible accident with a cunning lie they rested all satisfied My déere husband made hast thether and my louing sisters my carefull parents and fréends with panting fainting breasts came running to me And euery one of them equally deluded with a false tale did instéed of a most wicked woman repute and praise me for a holy Saint And euerie one after much wéeping first reprooued my life punished with so much sorrowe labouring afterwards to comfort me vp againe But from thence foorth it fell out that some beléeued that I was haunted and stinged with some fury and therefore like a madde woman continually watched mee But some more pittifull then the rest marking my mildnes and iudging it as it was indéede but a certaine gréefe of minde with taking great compassion of me laughed at that which the rest both dyd and sayd And visited thus of many I remained euery day more amazed then other And vnder the discrete garde of the sage Nource I was closely kept And as there is no anger so burning or so extreame All anger with time is brought to nothing but by course of time is made colde againe So remaining certaine dayes in this case as I haue set downe I came to my selfe at last againe and did manifestly know the Nurces wordes to be true And with bitter teares therefore I bewailed my passed follies But yet although that the heate of my rage in time was spent and became nothing my looue neuertheles did not one whitte decrease but taried with me still by reason of the melancholie vsed in other accidents before which now continually I had taking it gréeuously at the hart to be forsaken for the vniust looue of an other woman Wherefore I conferred with
more magnificent copious then any that had béene made in floorishing Rome of yore And the Theators resounding with swéete songes and melodious soundes did enuite euerie loouer to them The Heroicall young gentlemen sometimes mounted vpon stately coursers and prowde Gennets did runne at Tylte and Iust in rich and compleate Harnis and sometimes their pampred and headstrong Horses trapped all ouer with a caparison of little siluer and golden bels dyd hotly fight at Tourney And sometimes prowdly prancing vp and downe on them with skilfull hand did showe howe these foming fierie stéedes with frothie bytte should be managed and ridden The young and wanton Ladyes with decked troopes of beautifull Gentlewomen following them desiring also to sée these sportes wearing fyne garlandes of newe flowers about their heades dyd lende sweete and gratious aspectes to their gazing loouers sometimes out of highe windowes and sometimes from beneath their doores Of which some with newe giftes others with a merry countenaunce and some with swéete wordes but generally all with some fauour or other did fréendly honour theyr loouers and kindle greater flames in them But I like a straunger and forlorne woman sitting by my selfe in a sollitarie place all alone and comfortlesse for the decayed hope of my ioyfull times did not a little sorow with my self but lament greatly and mourne Nothing pleaseth my melancolyque fancyes no feaste could make my heart merry nor afforde any comfort to my gréeuous thoughts or ease my playntes My handes touched no gréene leaues caryed no swéete flowers in them and cared as little to handle any ioyfull thing as my sorrowfull eyes to beholde them And I became so péeuishe an emulatresse that I enuied at others myrth and with great desire dyd iniuriously wishe that euery woman might be so intreated with looue and serued with such sawce of Fortune as I was For with what a willing eare and with what great consolation doo I remember that many times I haue heard the recounted miseries and miserable mishappes that in times past and lately haue befallen to vnfortunate loouers But while the angrie Goddes helde me in this cursed condition of lyfe Fortune to afflicted the more often times showes a mery countenaunce deceitfull fortune with greater woes to afflict miserable menne chaunging as it were in the middest of theyr aduersities sheweth them sometimes a pleasant looke because abandoning themselues and trusting more to her fawnyng smiles they may fall into greater myseries when theyr momentary myrth beginneth once and on a sodaine to cease And so these ignoraunt fooles relying wholy vpon her at last perceyue themselues throwen headlong down as miserable Icarus in the middest of his flyght trusting to much to hys waxed winges and mounted vp to the hyghest skies fell from thence into the sea called yet after hys own name This frowning fortune I say perceiuing me amongest such séely soules not to be content with these passed euilles that she had giuen me preparing worser for me with a false and dissembled ioye beganne to smile vpon me and to mollifie somewhat her pawsed anger Because recoyling a good way backe she might no other wise then the hotte rammes of Affrica in rutting time to giue a greater dubbe assayle and hurte me the more And in this sorte with a certaine vayne gladnesse I made truce for a season with my sharpe and still sorrowes But my faythlesse loouer hauing now taryed a great many monthes more then those fower promised past and vnperformed Loouers are sometimes comforted with one ioy It fell out that sitting on a certaine day all alone in my sorrowfull chamber though wearied with the ouer-cloying companie of dolefull thoughts and accustomed lamentacions the olde and féeble Nurce with a more hastie pace then her aged limmes could well endure came rushing in her furowed face all bewette with trickling sweate and setting her selfe downe by me her breast panting vppe and downe and her eies expressing a certaine kinde of ioyfulnes in them she beganne many times to speake but the precedent faintnesse of her wearyed pulmon did euer breake of her wordes in the middest To whom with a minde full of suspicious woonder and fearefull doubt I sayd O déere Nurce what meaneth this great labour and paines that thou hast taken thus tyred thy selfe with What thing doost thou so earnestly desire to tell and with such hast that first thou wylt not suffer thy breathlesse spirittes to rest them What are they ioyfull or vnluckie tidinges Shall I prepare my selfe to flye to dye or what shall I doo Thy countenaunce I knowe not how nor wherefore dooth some what renue my drooping hope but my affayres hanging a long time in contrarie suspence perswade mee to suspecte more cruell mishappes which are of common course and custome incident to miserable creatures Tell me therfore quickly and hold me no longer in doubt resolue mee what the ocasion of this thy hast may importe Tell me whether any happy God or haggishe furie hath driuen thée hether Then the olde woman hauing yet scarce recouered her winde interrupting my wordes and more ioyfull then before sayd O swéete daughter reioyce there is no cause of feare in my tidinges Shake of all gréefe and inuest thy mourning minde againe with thy shining robe of mirth thy belooued and loouing loouer is returned And Panphilus Fiammetta is at hand These angelicall wordes entred so déepe into my amazed minde and filled it with such sodaine ioy as my eyes dyd presently showe an euident testimony of the same but my persuing gréefe and haunting miseries did incontinently bereaue me of it and made me giue no credite to them Wherfore lamenting I sayd O my déere Nource by those thy manie yéeres and by the aged body which long since hath desired eternall repose I pray thée not to mocke me a most miserable and distressed soule of whose cares and gréefes thou oughtest also to be partaker Impossible thinges For first will the cléere riuers I thinke returne to theyr first fountaines and Hesperus will bring cléere day First will Phebae with her brothers beames giue light to the darke night before my vngratefull loouer will returne Who dooth not know alas that disporting him selfe with his new mistresse he is lulled a sléepe in the secure cradle of all delightes enioying his mery times and loouing her more then euer he dyd me And thinke more ouer Fiammeta that wheresoeuer he were now he woulde returne to her againe and therefore not likely to come from her whom he looueth so etreamely to me whome he infinitly hateth But presently she added O Fiammetta as the gods shall receiue the parting soule of this withered and olde bodie thy carefull Nurce dooth not lie in one word she hath told thée Nor dooth it become one of my age with such or like tales to mocke distressed women and thée especially to whō I owe all the duetie and looue I may Then I replyed and sayd How came these blessed newes to thy eares
mynde diuyning as it were of ensuing misery and of worse mishappes did with great gréefe and lamentations lyke the Sicilian hill euaporate manie scalding sighes sobbes most manifest signes by the which I doo nowe certainely knowe that then there is some great and stormie tempest néere at hand when without any blast of turbulent windes the wary Sea-men perceiueth the calme and quiet seas beginne to swell But yet desirous to ouer-come that which my minde would not I sayd O miserable woman what ill news and what misfortunes to come néedlesse doost thou fayne in thy suspicious mind Say that this which thou foretellest of may happen to thy doubting mind of consequent mishappes thou fearest alas to late and without any profitte at all From these wordes therefore euer after I applied my minde wholy to a new kinde of mirth and I dyd as well as I could extinguishe all melancolique thoughts And warning my faithfull Nurce to be dilligent about Panphilus his returne I chaunged my mourning wéedes into gorgeous and gallant vestmentes and beganne to waxe very curious and carefull of my selfe because least by my long affected countenaunce and disordered attyre I might not at his returne séeme vnloouely in his eyes My pale and leane chéekes beganne to recouer theyr lost and liuely collour and recouering theyr forsaken plumpnes beganne to waxe round againe And my teares nowe dryed vp tooke away with them also those redde and purple rainebowes which encompassed my eyes round about The which being returned into their due places receiued again theyr whole and perfect lyghtes And my withered chéekes béeing somewhat broken and worne by continuall streames of teares that washed them grewe againe to theyr olde and former softnesse And my neglected haire although not sodainely they became not golden they wanted not now their accustomed frizelings and deintie deckinges to make thē looke so passing fayre as once they did And my déere and costly apparell hauing a longe time line vnworne in swéete Indian presses dyd now brauely set foorth my séemely body What more In bréefe The effects of them that returne to be ioyfull againe I turned my paines to pleasures my gréefes to gladnesse my sighing to singing my mourning to myrth made a renouation of my selfe and of all thinges else that belonged to mee And I made my selfe almost as beautifull as once I was first brought my selfe well nie to my former estate happinesse of life insomuch that the Gentlewomen my néere neighbours my déere kinsfolkes and my loouing husbande merueiled not a little at this sodaine chaung saying to themselues What inspiration hath drawen her from so long sorow and mittigated thus her continuall melancholie which neyther by swéete and effectuall comfortes nor by fréendly and loouing requestes could heretofore be dryuen out of her obstinate minde This is surely no lesse then a miracle And as they wondered much at it so were they also very gladde of this sodaine alteration All my familie being very heauie a long time for my continuall tribulation beganne with mée to reioyce now againe and as my errours were altered euen so it séemed that all thinges with the same were changed from sorrowe into sollace The dayes which erste I thought longer then they were wont to bee dyd by reason of the hope which I had of Panphilus his returne séeming now longest of all vnto mée passe away me◠thought with the slowest course that might be Nor the first were so well counted of me but with greater care and diligēce I marked these In space of which time sometimes sitting with my selfe all alone and thinking of my passed cares and carefull thoughtes I did now chéefely condemne them saying O how hardly of late haue I thought of my déere louer how rashlie haue I condemned his long staying and howe foolishly haue I beléeued that hee was wholy giuen ouer to the liking and looue of an other woman induced thereunto but by the slender report of one of my lying seruauntes Accursed therefore be theyr buzzing tales O Gods how can men with such open and impudent countenaunces tell abroade false and shamelesse lyes But euery thing Fiammetta should with more sound aduise of thy own part haue bene considered then so soone so easilie to haue giuen beléefe vnto them I should alas haue counterpoysed the fayth of my loouer so many times sworn and promised to me as many times againe with affectionate teares auowed and should haue weighed the looue that he bare me and yet dooth with theyr fabulous wordes false rumours and base credittes in the equall ballaunce of my right iudgement who without any sacrament of vrged othe and my selfe not caring to enquire furder and not desirous to knowe any more then that they spake tolde onely the bare reportes of others and with asseueration onely of their first opinions and superficical knowledge which doo nowe manifestly appeare to bee erronious and false One alleadging that he did se a young gentlewomen goe into Panphilus his fathers house because he knew not any other younge gentleman perhappes there but hym and not thinking of the vnséemely and common wantones of old dotardes or else ignoraunt perhappes of her alliaunce with them beléeued by and by that she was his wife and so without any more a doo tolde it her who therefore did beléeue it because shée tooke but little héede and care of him that told it An other because he perceiued him sometimes to eye some faire Gentlewomen or els to dally with her which might be was his Kinswoman or some one with whom hee was familiarly and honestly acquainted did iudge her to bee his also and affirming it againe with simple words to me I did like a simple Woman beléeue the same O that I had moste duely pondered these things in my minde how many teares what infinite sighes and what extreame gréefe had I neuer felt But what thing can an enamored and silly Woman aduisedlie ponderate in her minde and directlie doo As sundry forces assaile vs so doo they tosse and turne our minds to euerie change And simple Louers easily beléeue all thinges Because loue is a passion full of care and feare Loue is a thing ful of care and feare For by continuall vse they addict themselues alwaies to hurtfull accidents and desiring manie thinges beléeue most possibilities contrarie to their troubled fancies so fixing their irremooueable mindes vppon the first that to the second reportes and things they giue small beléefe or none at all But I am to be helde excused and therefore I alwaies prayed the Goddes that they would make me a lyer in my fonde imaginations and beléefe But behold my prayers are heard and he shal neuer vnderstand of these wordes which I haue spoken against him which if he did know he could say nothing els but that they procéeded from the feruent loue I bare him For howe déere a thing should it be to him to heare of my torments gréefe of minde and
to know of my passed and preuented perilles for his sake because these are moste true arguments of my vndoubted loue and faith and I can scarce thinke otherwise but that he hath taried so long and to none other ende but onely to prooue if with a constant minde I coulde without forgetting him attend his comming againe Behold therefore and with what force of minde I haue expected him Wherefore from hencefoorth when hee shall perceiue wyth what paine teares and with how many millions of martyring thoughts I haue looked for him loue shall be borne anewe againe in him and no other God Ah when shall it come to passe that hée béeing once arriued shall sée me and I him againe God seeth all things O yée Goddes which from your high thrones contemplate all thinges héere beneath may I temper and moderate my eager desire from embracing his bodie before all men as soone as I shall sée him Truelie I beléeue I shall hardlie doo it O bounteous Gods when shall it bee that enfolding him straightly betwéene mine armes I shall render him treble againe those kisses which at his departure hee gaue to my dying lyppes without any exchaunge for them againe Certes the presage which I noted that I was not able to bidde him farewell is nowe true and by that the Gods haue verie well declared to me his returne O yée gracious Gods when will that time come when I may ioyfully recount vnto him the Seas of salt teares and the worldes of woes which I haue passed and worne out and when shall I knowe the occasion of his long and sorrowfull absence shal I liue so long Alas I scarcely think it Ah let that day come quicklie because death not long since so often called and procured of me doth nowe terrify mee which if possiblye my prayers can enter into his eares I humbly beséech that flying farre from me he would let mee spende the remainder of my yong yéeres in ioy and pleasure with my beloued Panphilus I was therefore verie carefull that no day shold passe me wherein I did not employe my whole study and diligence to bee verie inquisitiue of Panphilus his returne and to heare also of some true newes of him And my déere Nurce was not negligent in séeking out the yong Gentleman bringer of these glad tidings because she might with more surenes be acertained of that which she had tolde mée which thing she did not only once but as often times as cōueniently she could and as many times as she had doone before she did alwaies bring mee worde that his returne was nigh at hand Wherfore I did not onely expect the promised time but procéeding a little further I did imagine it possible that he was now come And therfore a hundred times in the day I did runne sometimes beneath to the dore sometimes to the windowe looking round about me a great way if I might perceiue him come And I sawe not any manne comming a farre of that way that he should come but I dyd verilie imagine that it was he and with great desire didde looke on him so long vntill cōming néerer vnto me I might easily perceiue that it was not he Whereat béeing somewhat gréeued in minde I looked out to sée if any other came and sometimes one and now another passing by and séeing that none of them was hee I remained my gréedy desire and hope deceiued ful of confusion and very angry with my selfe And if I was perhaps called into the house or els by some other vrgent occasion went from the windowe a hundred thousand thoughts as if a multitude of dogs grinding their téeth at me had bittē my soule did sting and molest me saying to my selfe Alas euen now perhaps he goeth by or els is already passed whilst thou art héere busied about not so contented an office and immediatly I went againe to sée if I coulde sée him come Reade Ariosto of her that attended the returne of her Louer making it but a short time betwéene going downe to the dore and running quickly vp to the window againe Ah poore soule and wretched Woman how much sorrow and how many troubles diddest thou sustayne for him whom howrely looking for thou couldest neuer perceiue to come But after that the day was come in which my Nurce told mee that he should arriue and of the which she had so often foretold me I adorned my selfe no otherwise then Alcmena did when she heard that her Amphitrio was at hande and wyth my mastering hand left not any thing in me vnbeautified but sette forth in the best and brauest order and in the finest fashion And I coulde scarce kéepe my selfe in from going to the Sea syde because I myght the sooner see hym because also I hearde certaine newes of the arriual of those Gallies in the which my Nurce vnderstood and certified me that he should come But thinking with my selfe that the first Saint that he would visite on shoare was my selfe I therefore bridled my earnest and hote desire But in fine as I rightlie gesse he came not at all whereuppon I beganne beyonde all measure to meruaile and in the middes of my late ioye arised in my minde diuers kinds of doubtes which were not so easilie ouerthrowne by superficicall suppositions of his comming or by any other shaddowes of glad some thoughts After a little while therefore I sent the old Woman to know what was become of him and whether he was come or not who went as it séemed with such an vnwilling minde and with as flow a pace which did diuine of some consequent and sorrowfull tydinges Wherefore I accursed many times with my selfe and with greate anger blamed her crooked steppes and aged paces Who staying but a little time abroade came to me againe with a sorrowfull chéere and dull gate Signes of one that bringeth ill newes Alas when I sawe her come in this sort I could hardlie containe my soule in my bodie and therefore suddainly imagined that my Louer was deade by the way or els that hee was arriued verie sicke The colour of my face chaunged a thousande times in one instant and going to méete the dreaming Nurce I saide vnto her Tel me quickly what newes doost thou bring Doth my Louer liue Shee chaunged not her gate nor answered me one word And béeing nowe entred into my Chamber and setting her selfe downe looked me very pittifullie in the face Wherefore euerie parte of my bodie being shaken like the tender Aspen leaues by some soft winde I did beginne nowe to tremble and hardly restraining my teares I crossed myne armes and did put my hands into my sorrowfull bosome saying If thou doost not tell me quickly what this thy sorrowfull countenaunce doth meane and what these sadde signes which thou doost bring with thée doo signify there shall not any part of my garments remaine whole to my body nor hayre vntorne from my head What secrete occasion therefore may it be
otherwise doo in this sorte as you shall heare I passed away my melancholie times I say therefore that martired with these continuall anguishes and considering well of others who haue not béene exempted from the lyke the painefull looues of Inacus his daughter who being first a tender and delicate damsell and passing loouely and beautifull did séeme liuely to represent me came to my minde and afterwards her great good happe and happy felicitie in that she was not meanely belooued of mightie Ioue Which thing doubtlesse cold not be of her onely but of euery womā also accompted a great glory and praise Afterwardes considering howe shee was metamorphised into a Cowe and how by the seuere commaunde of iealious Iuno she was kept of vigilant Argus I did iudge her to be beyond all measure tormēted with great anxieties and gréefe of mind And certes I am of opinion that her gréefs did greatly excéede mine if that for her company comfort she had not had sometimes the assistance of her loouing God And who dooth doubt if I had the swéete company of my loouer who might any time haue helped me in these ruthfull passions or that he had but sometimes taken any little pittie of me that any woes whatsoeuer coulde haue annoyed me so as they haue continually doone Bedes this her ende made her passed and approoued sorrowes very light Because Argus being killed by her loouers messenger and she transported lightly with her heauie body into Egipt and returned there to her owne shape againe and maryed to Ostiris she sawe her selfe at last installed in the Emperiall diademe and like a happy Quéene to sway the regal scepter of Egipt If I could but thinke or hope though in my olde age to sée my Panphilus once againe I would say that my gréefes were not to be compared with the sorrowes of this Lady But the Gods onely knowe if this good fortune shall euer happē to me or no howsoeuer with false hope in the meane time I delude and flatter my selfe The greater part of these fables are in Ouide Next to her the vnfortunate looue of Biblis is represented vnto my thoughts whom me thinke I sée forsake all her wealth ioy and pleasure to followe vnflexible Caunus And with these I bethinke my selfe also of wicked Mirrha who after the detested fruition of her odious looues flying from her angry Father who pursued her with menaces of iust death plunged also into that misery I behold also dolorus Canace who after the miserable byrth of her incestious conceptiō looked for nothing lesse but death And thinking well with my selfe of their seuerall sorrowes I dyd doubtlesse estéeme them to be extreame although their looues were but filthy and abhominable lustes But if I am not deceiued I sée them all ended or else in shorte space to be terminated Because Mirrha flying away hauing the Goddes pittifull of her paines and aunswerable to her desires was with delay transformed into a trée of her owne name And shee neuer after although it dooth continually destill Amber teares as shee dyd at the very instant when her forme was changed felte any of her former paynes and playntes And as the occasion of her sorrowes dyd aryse so the cause of theyr pryuation was not also wanting Biblis likewise as some say without any longer delay ended her dolefull daies with a cruell halter admitte that others holde that by great fauour of the Nimphes who did commisserate her harde destinies she was turned into a fountaine of her owne name till this day yet kéeping the same And this befell to her when she knew that Caumus denied her her desires and scornefully reiected her companie and with frowning browes reprooued her wicked sutes What shal I say in shewing my owne paines greater alas then those that molested Biblis more gréeuous then those that Mirrha had but that the breuiety of them hath had no small aduantage ouer the length of mine Those therefore well considered the pittifull looues of haplesse Pyramus and Thisbe were next obiected to my remembraunce of whome I cannot but take great compassion imagining them both to be young and with great trouble many sorowes to haue burned in each others looue and labouring with mutuall presence to haue reaped the fruite of theyr feruent desires which with vntimely death and in shorte time were equallie dissolued O what a pittifull thing is it to thinke what gréefe pearced poore Pyramus his hart when in the silent time of night finding his déere Thisbes robes bloody and torne of the wild beast at the foote of the Mulbery trée néere vnto the foūtaine and appointed méeting place by these dismall vnexpected tokens he surely thought that she was deuoured The sheathing certes of his own sword in his inpatiēt breast did shew it manifestly enough Afterwards discoursing in my minde the wounding thoughtes of miserable Thisbe beholding her loouer wallowing in his owne goare and pāting yet with declining life I thinke them to be so gréeuous and imagine her teares also to be such burning droppes that I can hardlie beléeue that there were euer any myne owne excepted that dyd torment and scalde more then hyrs Wherefore these two as it is now sayd in the very beginning of theyr gréefes and looues dyd ende the very same O thrise happy soules if that in the other world as in this their perfect and firme looue dooth still remaine inuiolate And so the paynes cares and infinite woes of all theyr former looue could not be equiualent with the delightes and content of their eternall company After these the gréefe of forsaken Dido entred with greater force and déeper consideration into my minde because her condition did of all others most resemble mine I imagined how she was building of Carthage and studying with great Maiesty to dictate lawes in Iunos temple to her new people And how she gaue bountifull entertainment to Aeneas a straunger vnto her by enuious tempests of the Sea weatherbeaten and cast vpon her Libian shores and how she was enamoured of his braue personage and passing vertues and at last howe she committed both her selfe and all hirs to the disposition and pleasure of that Troyan Duke Who hauing vsed her royall Pallaces at his pleasure and soaked himselfe in all manner of delices in her countrie she being euery day more and more enflamed with his looue abandoning her at last departed from thence O how much without compare did she séeme miserable in my conceite beholding her looking from her highest turrettes towards the sea couered with disankred shippes of her flying and vnpittifull loouer But I iudge her more impatient then dollorous when I thinke of her cruell death And certes at the first departure of my Panphilus I felt in my oppinion the very selfe same gréefe as she did on the sodaine endure at the sayling away of false Aeneas O that it had so pleased the Goddes that I as vnable to endure my gréefe as she was hers had
with some sodaine death ended my loathed life so that by these meanes I might haue deliuered my selfe from these paines and sorrowes as she dyd her selfe which afterwardes by defaulte thereof dyd continually cleaue in sunder my afflicted hart After these miserable thoughtes and the ruthfull chaunces of vnhappy Heroe of Sesto came to my minde whome mee thought I sawe comming downe from her highest Tower to the Sea bankes and rockes where she was wont sometimes to méete and receiue her welbelooued and wearied Leander into her armes And euen there againe mée thinks I se her with what a pittifull pale countenance she beheld her loouer lying dead before her Sorrow ceaseth when hope is past to regaine the thing which is lost driuē first on shore by a fréendly Dolphin al naked souced in brinish waters laid along vpon the Sea sands wiping with her garmentes the salte water from his pale visage and drowning hym the second time with the flowing streames of her swelling teares Ah what great pittie dooth her cruell passages finde in my sorrowfull mind More truelie then any of those of the foresayd ladyes and sometimes so much that forgetting my owne woes I did wéepe and lament for hirs And lastly cold I conceiue no meanes for her cōfort but one of these two either to die or else to forget him as other dead men haue béene In taking eyther of which her sorrowes I thinke might haue easilie béene finished Considering that no lost thing in recouering of which againe there is no hope lefte can gréeue vs any long time But yet the Goddes forbidde that this kinde of comfort should happen to me which if it did come to passe no counsel in such a case should auaile but that which perswaded me once to a resolute and hasty death For during the time that my Panphilus liueth whose lyfe his happie starres and predominante planettes preserue as long as he himself dooth desire that cannot I hope nor shall not befall vnto me But séeing the enter course of mundane thinges in continuall motion this beléefe is added to my hope that in the end or else perhappes before he shall returne and be mine againe as once he was which lingering hope not comming to effect dooth howerly make my life gréeuous and irkesome vnto mée And by thus much therfore I estéeme my selfe oppressed with greater sorrowe then she was I remēber that in French méeters to which if any credite may be lent I haue sometimes read that Sir Tristram and Lady Isotta haue more then any other loouers French Rimes mutually and feruentlie looued each other and with their chaunging delightes haue had great misfortunes and aduersities enter mingled euen in the floorishing and brauest time of theyr youth who because loouing greatly togeather they haue tasted both of one ende it séemes most credible that not without extreame sorrowe and bitter gréefe on bothsides they forsooke their worldly delightes Which may be easilie graunted if in abandoning this world they thought that in the other the same could not bée found or had But if they had this opinion that they were as ample and common in the other as they had in déede then it is to be thought that death had rather aforeded them some great content and ioy then any sorrow and feare at all For what certaintie of gréefe may one giue with testimonie of a thing which he neuer prooued None at all truely In Syr Tristram his armes was his owne death and the death of hys Lady also For if in embracing her body so straightly and loouingly it had gréeued her at all in opening his armes againe the payne no doubt had ceased And yet for all this let vs admit and say that it is by great reason most fearefull and gréeuous to tast of what gréefe can wée say to be absolutely in a thing that dooth come to passe but onely once and which dooth occupie but a little space of time Certes none Sir Tristram therfore Isotta in one hower ended their delightes dollours The continued time of my stretching gréefe and lasting sorrowe hath without comparison greatly excéeded the breuitie of my enioyed myrth and ioyes But amongest the number of these foresayd loouers my minde did thinke of miserable Phedra who with her voluntary and aduised furie was the occasion of his most cruel death whom she loued more then her selfe I knowe not truely what dammage great inconuenience did follow her of such a great fault but I am certaine if the like had euer happened to me there had bene nothing but violent death that might expiate the guilt therof but if she liued she buried him afterward in darck obliuiō as commonly all thinges as euen now I sayd are wont to bée forgotten by death And besides these sorowes which Laodamia Deiphyle Argia Euadne Deianira and many others felte followed hers in my scanning thoughts all which eyther by violent death or by necessary obliuion receiued some comfort at last Fier the lōger it remaineth in any thing the more it burneth And who doubteth that burning fire red hotte iron and melted leade dooth not gréeuously burne and scalde his finger who dooth but sodainely dippe it in and dooth quickly pull it out againe Why none I thinke And yet this is nothing to that extreame payne whose whole body is in eyther of these tormented and plunged for a good space togeather wherfore how many soeuer I haue described aboue in woes sorowes paynes the same may be said to be but a momentarie while in their superficiall and counterfeite gréefes whereas I haue really felt them continually béene in them and am not yet frée from them Wherefore all these foresayd woes in respect of mine haue béene but amorous annoyaunces But besides these miserable women the no lesse sorrowful teres powred forth of those who with the vnexpected brunts of cruell fortune haue béene confounded came before mine eyes And these are those of Iocasta Hecuba Sophonisba Cornelia and Cleopatra O how much myserie considering well the miserable successe of Iocastas looues doo we sée befallen vnto her in all her life time possible enough to haue daunted and troubled the most stout and strongest minde For she being very young was maried to Layus King of Thebes who commaunded that her first childe should be throwen out to be deuowred of wilde Beastes the miserable Father thinking by this to haue preuented that which the heauens and his ineuitable destinies with infallible course had prepared for him O what a gréefe must I néedes thinke that this was to her soule considering the degrée of her that sente it and that with her owne handes she was constrained to deliuer and to sende it to a cruell kinde of death and afterwardes certified by them that caried her vnfortunate infante of his mangled and deuoured corpes with what intollerable gréefe she beléeued that he was deade indéede And to see her haplesse Husband most miserably slaine of him
whom hee had engendred in her owne bowels and that she her selfe afterwards espoused to her vnknowne Son had by him foure children And so how almost in one howre she sawe her selfe mother and wife to this wicked Parricide whom after shée had perfectly knowne when she sawe him depriued first of his eyes and last of his kingdom and how his execrable fact and detested life was published to the whole worlde In what miserable plight her soule was then oppressed nowe wyth manie yéeres which were rather desirous of repose then méete to be diminished with restles anguish shee may well thinke and iudge who hath béene tossed with the greatest or with like gréefes of minde But yet her dispiteous and cruell Fortune heaped vppon her extreame misery greater and more bitter woes For séeing the yéerely entercourse successiue raigne of her two Sonnes with mutuall compositition deuided betwéene them And afterwardes the faithlesse brother pynned vppe in the Cittie and séeing the greatest part of Greece vnder the regiment of seauen Kings lastly after manie blooddie battailes consuming fires myserable spoyle of Virgins wiues and goods When shee behelde one of her prodigious Sons vnnaturally to embrew his sworde in his owne brothers blood and when her Husbands Sonne driuen out and exiled into an other Kingdome she sawe the auncient and olde walles of her noble Cittie builded firste by the swéete harmonie of Amphitrion his Cythern pittifullie ruinated and beaten downe And howe her late florishing kingdome was miserably diuided and vtterlie dissolued and hauing hanged her selfe left perhaps her Daughter in a most ignominous and shamefull life What coulde the angry Goddes the world froward Fortune and the malicious Hagges of hell haue conspired more against her Nothing certes in my opinion For let that gastly place be surueyed and euery torture therein duelie considered and yet I hardlie beléeue that there coulde not in the same such extreame torments and paines be founde Wherefore I approoue and say that euery least particle of her anguish and of her fault to be most gréeuous and no lesse impious And as there is no woman that would iudge that my gréefe were not to be compared to the greatnes of this so truely would I also say had not mine béene amorous For who doubteth but that she knewe séeing the abhominable crymes of her wicked house and of vnnaturall Husband worthy of the condigne anger of the Goddes that duely scanned these aduerse accidents these horrible accidents to be meritorious punishmēts for such heynous guilt and barbarous impietie None truely that would iudge her to be in her right witts And if she were but a foole shee felt her gréefes the lesse because not fully knowing the waight of them they could not so greatly gréeue her And whosoeuer knoweth her selfe woorthy of such calamities troubles that she endureth with little gréefe or none at all shee resolueth with her selfe more patientlie to passe them away But I neuer committed anie thing wherewith the Gods might iustly be offended with me hauing with continual offerings honored them and with holy victimie besought their diuine graces neuer despysing their Godheads as in times past the Thebanes most wickedly did But perhappes some one may well obiect and say Howe canst thou affirme that thou hast not deserued punishment or that thou hast not committed anie fault Why hast thou not violated the holy lawes and with an adulterous youthe defiled thy marriage bedde yes truely But if this matter bee well propounded as I haue not my selfe onely doone thys cryme so dooth it not deserue I thinke so greate punishment and such gréeuous paynes Because shée must thinke that I being a tender yong Gentlewoman was not able to gainesaye and resiste that which the strongest menne in the world nay the Gods themselues coulde not doo And as I am not the first that hath committed such a fréendly fault so am I not alone and shall not bee the laste but hauing almost all Women in the worlde my companions in this excusable errour I am not so greatly to bee condemned for the same And those lawes which I haue infringed are of common course wont fauourably to pardon a multitude My fault moreouer as it was most secrete so it shoulde not therefore be so seuerely and thorowlie punished A secrete fault is halfe pardoned And besides all this Say that the Goddes were iustly stirred vppe to wrath against mee and did seeke to giue mée sharpe corrections for my great offences were it not a greater parte of iustice and more reason to punish him who was the occasion of my fall Nowe whither burning and lawles loue He that is the occasion of sinne ought worthely to be punished or Panphilus his rare beauty braue personage and quallities induced me to corrupt the sacred lawes of wedlock I know not but knowing too too well that both the one and the other were of most great force to torment me most stranglie So that this nowe did not happen by the sinne committed but is rather a newe gréefe and sequestred from the rest more cruelly cruciating the patient and sustayner of it then anie other The which moreouer if the Goddes for my committed offence had giuen me they shoulde doo contrary to theyr right iudgment and accustomed manner in that they should not with the sinne recompence the punishment which béeing compared to the due paynes of Iocasta and to her deserued defaults and considering mine owne errors and the seuere punishment which I doo suffer for the same shee must néedes be saide to be but slightly punished and my selfe with too rigorous chastisement and vnmeasurable paine to be corrected Nor let not any take holde of this that shee was bereaued of her Kingdome depryued of her Sonnes despoyled of her Husband and last of all of her owne life and I but onely of my Louer All which truely I confesse But spyghtful Fortune caryed away with this Louer all my felicitie though that which perhappes in other mens sight and iudgment was accounted happines hath stil remained with me and which is cléene contrarie to my desires Because my Husband my parents my riches and all things els besides are a most gréeuous burden vnto mée and nothing congruant with my wished content Which things if she had taken from me as she did my Louer there had thē remained a most open way for me to haue fulfilled my desires which vndoubtedly I would haue followed By which if I could not haue brought to passe my wil then were there a thousand kinds of deathes readie for me to haue rydde me from all my woes and miseries Wherefore I iustly thinke that my paines are much more greater then any of the foresaide Hecuba Me thinkes that next after these I sée Hecuba cōming to my minde passing sorrowfull in her countenaunce who escaped from that generall ruine and suruiuing onely to behold the dolefull and destroyed Reliques of so goodly a kingdome the subuersion of such an
admirable Cittie the cruell death of so Princly a Husbande of so many renowned sons and most faire daughters to sée the destruction of so manie magnanimious Nephewes valiant Cosins and Allyes the rapine of so great riches the hauocke of infinite treasure the spoyle of so manie Virgins the rauishment of wiues and of all sorts of Women the extinction of such excellencie the losse of so many Kinges hewed and slaine right downe such blodie massacres and pittiful stratagemes of the dismayed and betrayed Troyans the impietie perpetrated in the Temples polluted battered and made plaine with the ground and the indignitie and irreuerence doone to their dishonoured chased Goddes And séeing her selfe to be olde and sorrowfully recalling to her wounded minde what mighty Hector was what valiant Troylus what doughtie Deiphobus what her yongest darling Polydore and the shyning vertues of manie noble men more and howe vnfortunatlie shee sawe them all die remembring also howe the generous bloode of her late mighty and maiesticall Husbande was cruelly shed in her own lappe before the holie Aulters and how she saw fatall Troy whilome reared vppe to the skyes with stately Towres famous for magnificent buildings full of princely Pallaces and very populous with noble and worthy Cittizens consumed with deuouring flames and wholy rased frō the earth And besides all this the pittifull sacrifice of her fayre Daughter Polyxena offered vppe by vnpittifull Pyrrhus to the shadow of Achilles Oh with what excessiue greefe and anguish of minde must we néedes thinke that shee behelde all these thinges But short was the sorrowe which her olde and féeble minde not able to endure the same wandering out of her right course made her madde as her barking complaints amiddes the fieldes and woods did plainely shew But I with a more firme and perfect memory then is néedefull for such woes to my great gréefe doo continually remaine in my sorrowfull and sound witts and doo discerne more and more the preposterous occasions of my present woes and of my future sorrowes Because my manyfolde harmes enduring longer then hers I thinke them be they neuer so light to be more gréeuous as I haue many times said then the greatest and most sensible paines which is ended in a short time Sophonisba equally participating the aduersities in her Widdowhoode Sophonisba and the ioy of her mariage in one selfe same moment almost of time iocande and sad an honorable and glad spouse and a poore prisoner inuested and despoyled of a Kingdome and finally in these shorte alterations of tottering Fortune drinking her fatall poyson full of anguishe and deadly gréefe appeareth next vnto my thoughts Behold her sometimes a most high and famous Quéene of the Numidians afterwards the martiall affayres of her Parents and fréends hauing but an aduerse and lucklesse issue her Husbande Siphax taken from her and become prisoner to Massinissa King of Marsilia warring vnder the Romaine Ensignes and her selfe in one howre depriued of her Kingdome and prysoner also in the mids of her enemies Campe Massinissa afterwardes making her his wife and she restored to the same againe O with what despight gréefe and bitter anguishe of mind doo I beléeue that shee sawe these thinges succéede abruptlie one after another Nor yet secure of her voluble and flattering Fortune with howe heauy a hart did shee celebrate her newe espousalles which gréefes and extreame myseries with a tragicall ende at last and with a stout enterprise she did fully finish Because not one naturall day after the nuptiall rytes béeing yet spent and scarcely thinking with her selfe that she remained in the regiment and that she did beare the former sway of Scepter and warring thus within her selfe and thinking of the newe loue of Massinissa not framed well to her minde the olde loue of Siphax béeing not yet extinct with no trembling hart but wyth a bolde hande receiued the mortiferous poysonne which her newe Husbande sent her by her owne Seruaunt the fearfull messenger of her vntimely death and with certaine dispitifull and premised spéeches without any signe and token of feare in her resolute face druncke of the same immediatly after yéelding vppe her ghost O how bitter may one imagine that her life was if she had had any longer time to meditate and think of her death that did followe Who therefore is not to be placed but amongst those Women To think of greefe maketh it greater who haue béene but meanely and not much afflicted with sorow considering that her spéedy death did preuent her beginning woes where as mine haue continued with me a long time together and yet doo accompanye me against my wyll and are sworne to remaine styll wyth me to make themselues more mighty thereby with their vnited forces to infest more their vsurped habitation After her doleful Cornelia oppressed with infinit sorrow was obiected to my musing thoughts Cornelia whō smiling Fortune had exalted so high to make her the first wife of Crassus and afterwards great Pompey his spouse whose worthy valor had almost gotten him the chiefest principality in Rome attayned to the sole gouernmēt of all the Empire annexed vnto it Who notwithstanding-after that frowning Fortune changed her copie in maner of a fugitiue fled miserably out of Rome and afterwards out of all Italy her selfe also with her husbande béeing fiercely pursued of conquering Caesar And leauing her in Lesboe after many turmoyles of inconstant fortune ouercomming his puissaunt competitour in Thessaly by whose discomfiture and ouerthrowe hee recouered hys force and might againe which not long since by his valiaunt enemy was greatly abated And besides all this with hope to reintegrate and to renue his power in the conquered East floting vpon the surging Seas and arriued in the kingdoms of Egypt offering himselfe voluntarily to the defence and trusty tuition of yong King Ptolomie béeing there cruelly doone to death she sawe his embrued and headlesse troncke tossed and beaten vpp and downe the raging waues Which things if euery one by it selfe or altogether be duely considered we must néedes say that without al compare they afflicted most gréeuously her dying soule But the sounde and comfortable counsell of the sage Vtique Cato and the lost hope in these instabillities of Fortune to regaine her Pompey againe in a little time mittigated nay rather adnihilated her former sorrowes wheras I styll nourished with vaine hope not able by any counsell or comfort to driue away the same but by the simple aduise of my olde Nurce equally knowing of my sorrowes from the beginning in whose hart I knewe good will more ryfe then wysedome rype in her heade because beleeuing oftentimes to remedy my gréefe shee hath redoubled them doo euermore remain liue cōsuming my selfe in bitter plaints and confoūded in a thousand doubts and anxieties of minde There are also many Cleopatra who I think doo beléeue that Cleopatra Quéene of Egypt did suffer intollerable gréefe and that her paines
stratagems The sorrowfull teares of Licurgus I meane with the mortall exequies honoured of the seauen kinges and infinite sportes and spectacles made by them in solemnization of that glorious funerall and those of Atalanta made notable and beutified also with the laudable life and victorious death of her young Sonne But I haue not any thing nor any such cause to make my teares scarce well employed much lesse excellent and my selfe content because if it were so wheras I now estéeme my selfe more dolefull and vnfortunate then any other perhappes I should be perswaded to auerre the contrary Vilisses The long trauelles of Vlisses his mortall and imminent perrilles his wandering and weary perigrinations and all his déedes whatsoeuer are next of all shewed vnto mée who neuer tasted them but seasoned with most bitter and extreame anguishe of minde and redoubled many times in my imaginations they make me thinke mine to be farre greater and much more gréeuous and harken why Because first and principally he was a manner and therefore of nature more strong and better able to endure them then I being a tender and young woman and he béeing moreouer continuallie armed with a stoute couragious and feirce mynde and beaten to dailie daungers as one rypened amongest them when hee trauailed and turmoyled dyd séeme to haue but his ordinary repose nay his greatest ease and pleasure in them But I béeing continually in my Chamber and tenderlie serued with daintie and delicate thinges passing my times awaie in pleasures and dailie accustomod to dalliances of wanton looue euery little payne and feare thereof is most gréeuous vnto me He driuen and pricked on by Neptune and transported into diuers partes the of world and of Aeolus likewise receyued his troubles But with careful looue I am infected and with such a lord infested that troubled and conquered them that molested and tossed Vlisses And if daungerous casualties and daylie feares dyd séeme to threaten him of his proper accorde hée wandered continually in séeking of them out And who can with iust cause complaine or be agréeued for finding of that which he dooth so earnestly séeke for None can be sorrowfull for finding that they seeke But I séely wretche would faine liue in quiet if I could and would willingly fly from woes and gréefes if that so rigorously they dyd not rushe vpon me and if I were not my selfe so forcibly driuen vpon them Besides this he was not afrayd of death and therefore without feare did commit him selfe to her force and might But I liue in continuall dreade of it though compelled by extreame sorrowe I haue sometime not without feare of greater gréefe runne willingly vnto it He also by his long trauelles and ieopardies of Fortune dyd hope to get eternal glorie and neuer dying fame But I am afrayd of my escandilized name and infamous memory hereafter if it shoulde come to passe that these secrete looues should at any tyme come to lyght So that now his paynes are not greater and more then myne but are rather in number and quallitie farre lesse then mine and by so much the more as they are fabulated to be greater then euer they were indéede But mine alas are to true so many and more greater then I am able my selfe to recounte But after all these I sée me thinkes the sorrowes sobbes and heauie sighes the infinite woes and pittious plaints that Hipsiphile Medea and Oenone had and the pittifull teares of Ariadne which were more copious then all the rest all which I iudge most like vnto mine Because euery one of these lyke my selfe deceiued of their loouers watred the ground with teares cléeued the heauens with cōtinuall sighes sustained without any frute or hope of future content most bitter tormentes of mynde And admit as it is graunted that these dolours were cast vpon thē by their vngrateful loouers and by theyr iniurious and vndeserued ingratitude yet with iust reuenge of their wronges doone vnto them they sawe the ende of theyr teares which comfortes although I wishe it not my sorrowes also haue not Hipsiphile Hipsiphile admitte that she had greatly honoured Iason and had by due desertes obliged him vnto her perceiuing him to be taken away of Medea had with as great reason as my selfe iust occasion of complaint and sorrowe But such was the prouidence of the Goddes that with righteous eyes beholding euery thing but onely my harmes they restored to her a great portion of her desired ioye because she sawe Medea who had taked away Iason from her Iason forsaking Medea for the looue of Creusa quit dispossessed of her once enioyed praye Certes I doo not say that my gréefe should finishe if I should sée the same befall to her who hath deceiued me of my Panphilus vnlesse I were that she that should alure him from her againe but will francklie confesse that a great parte of my sorrow would for a time cease Medea dyd also reioyce for reuenge Medea that she had although she was no lesse cruell towardes her selfe then malicious against her vngratefull loouer in killing their common children in his owne presence and consuming the royall pallaces of king Creon and the new Lady with merciles flames Oenone also sorrowing along time in fine knewe Oenon that her disloyall loouer suffered due punishment for breaking and corrupting the sacred lawes of looue and sawe his countrie for the wicked rape and exchaung of her selfe for his newe adultersse miserably wasted and his owne Cittie sometimes the seate of demie Goddes and semy Goddesses but now an vncouth habitacle and a poore village of Sheppard swaines ouerthrowen razed cleane from the ground But truely I loue my gréefs a great deale more thē I wold eyther with tongue or hart wishe so sharpe a reuenge of my wrongfull Panphilus Ariadne also being Bacchus his wife Ariadne saw from heauen furious Phedra who was the cause that Theseus abandoning her and leauing her desolate in the Iland being newly enamoured of Phedra miserably bewitched with the incestuous looue of Hippolitus her husbande his sonne So that euery thing duely scanned I finde my selfe amongest the number of miserable and desastrous women to be tormented with more woes gréefes and with greater sorrowe then any of the rest and to haue the sole principallitie and onely name of all other distressed women whatsoeuer And I can doo no more But if perhappes good Ladies you accompt my framed arguments but friuolus assertions and repute all these former examples but weake proofes as forged in the simple conceite of an appassionated woman if you imagine them because procéeding from a blinde mind to be but blind also and of no conclusion estéeming the teres sighes and sorrowes of others more extreame then mine and thinking them to be more vnfortunate then my selfe let this onely and last proposition therefore supplie the defecte if any there be of all the rest before If he that beareth enuie is more miserable and
beare thou neuertheles their scornes and digest their taunts which are but the least part of our great gréefes and which séeme nothing at all to those that wee haue already passed And put her in mind that Fortune is euermore vnconstant and wauering by which Caueat she may knowe that by the ordinary course of her mutabilitie she may make vs gladde againe and may bring her to that kinde of painefull life as she hath now driuen vs vnto and that then with like mocks and flowtes we will requite and pay hers home again But if thou shalt finde any one that in reading of thée cannot kéepe the teares from her eyes but that condolent and pittifull of our cares and paines doth with the same multiply thy blots receiue and gather them as most precious and holy drops in thy bosome and mingle them with mine and thē shewing thy selfe more pittifull afflicted request her humbly that she would pray for me to him who dooth with golden feathers in a moment visit all the worlde so that entreated by a more religious mouth and by more meritorious prayers then mine and therefore more plyable to the peticions of others then to my plaints he may lighten my heauy sorowes and take away my oppressing anguish of mind And whosoeuer she be euen with that forme of wordes which to miserable wretches is graunted most exaudible I pray and doo with those prayers most hartily obtest which are in the eares of the hearers of them most effectuall that shee may neuer taste of such bytter miseries and that the placable Gods may be euer fauourable vnto her and that she may happily and perpetually enioy her loue according to her owne desires But if among the amorous company of wanton yong Gentlewomen posting thée from one hand to another thou doost by chaunce come to the fingering of myne enemie and to the wrongfull vsurpresse of my felicitie flye incontinently from thence as from an infectious naughty place and discouer not one of thy leaues lynes or letters to her robbing and bewitching eyes least that vnderstanding the second time of our woes paines she might haue more occasion to boast and brag againe that she hath wounded and confounded mee But yet if it chaunce that by force she kéepe thée and manger thy téeth wyl sée read thée then offer thy selfe in such sort to her that she may not laugh but lament in reading of my hard mishaps and pricked with the sting of her guilty conscience she may be in minde perswaded to restore to me againe my vniustly detayned Louer O what happy pittie and holy pietie should this bee and then howe would the sower fruite of this harshe paines séeme swéet to my distempered taste Shunne the eyes of men of whom if thou canst not choose but be séene speake vnto them saying O vngratefull generation decidours and deceiuours of simple women it is not méete for you considering your demerites to looke into holy things and fraught full of such pitty as this is and knowing your remorce of pittie to bee so small as your impietie and cruelty is great vnfitte to meddle with distressed and pittifull things But if to him who is the orgaine of all our harmes thou doost chaunce to come with this exclamation a farre of gréete him from me saying O thou which art more rigorous and harder then anye Oake flye from hence and doo not violate mee with thy vnwoorthy and polluted handes Thy corrupted faith is an occasion of all this which I bring with me But yet if wyth a curteous gentle and indifferent minde thou wilt reade me recognizing thy former faults and present iniuries vniustly doone against her whose messenger of sorrow I am and that returning to her againe thou desirest to bee pardoned of her then boldly sée touch and spare not to reade me But if thou wylt not performe this last requisite duetie it is not then so decent and honest a thing for thée to sée the pittifull teares which thou hast vnpittifully caused and then woulde it bee againe but small for thy credite to encrease them more and more if in reading mee thou doost as I thinke thou canst not persist in thy first and froward wyll And if perhaps any curious and dainty Gentlewomanne doth dislike of thy words so rudely composed and so disorderly couched together tell her that that which is vnpolished and vnpleasant for her fine conceit shee may if shee please ouerslyppe and let passe because braue filed spéeches require cléere mindes and frée from all hurtfull passions and are best beséeming merry and calme times And therefore thou shall say vnto her that shee may a great deale sooner fall in admiration howe my troubled witte my tyred penne and paynes dyd last out but for that little which thou doost tell out of order considering that feruent loue on the one side and burning iealosie on the other with diuers conflicts held my sorowful soule in continuall battayles thy obscure and clowdy times féeding the one and contrary Fortune fauouring the other Thou maist goe safely away as I beléeue and securely escape from all awaytes layd to entrappe thée and néedest not care for the cauils of captious heades because thou mayst be assured that Enuie with her venimous téeth or infectious tongue shall neyther byte nor styng thée But if perchaunce thou shalt finde any which I thinke thou neuer canst that béeing more miserable then thy selfe might emulate thée as one more happy and not so wretched as her selfe then patiently suffer thy selfe to be bitten But I doo not well knowe what part of thée shall receiue any newe offence since that with the cruel blowes of angry Fortune I sée thée torne and broken in euery place Thou canst not be iniuried now anie more by her then already thou art nor from any high and happy seate is she able to make thée fall down to a more vile and base place for so lowe as none may bee lower is that where now thou doost remaine And admit that she hath not thought it méete to conioyne vs with the superficiall part of the earth and dooth still séeke and suppeditate straunger occasions to interre vs vnder it we are so beaten and so enured to aduersities that with those shoulders with which wée haue sustained and doo yet beare the greatest and most heauie burdens of woes and sorrow wee shall with lesse payne and not with so great gréefe beare lighter and endure lesser then those And therefore let her assaile vs when and where she will Liue therefore For nothing may depriue thee of this And remaine an eternall example and perpetuall president of bitter anguish and gréefe of thy wofull Mistresse to those who liue in happy mirth and heauy miserie Bueno fin haze el qual bien amando muera ⧠A Table of the contentes of the seuen bookes of Fiammetta Of the first Booke FIammetta her dreame in the which all her future infelicitie is shewed and set downe
fol. 2 A presage signifying the aduerse successe of her looue fol. 3 The description of the young Gentleman whome Fiammetta did choose for her loouer fol 4 The spéeches of Fiammetta her Nurce tending to her reprehension fol. 8 Fiammetta her aunswer vnto them fol. idem Venus appearing to Fiammetta dooth with many wordes perswade her to looue fol. 11. The meanes that Panphilus obserued to manifest his looue to Fiammetta fol. 16 The end of Fiammetta her amorous desires fol. 17 The second Booke Panphilus vnfoldeth to Fiammetta the occasion constraining him to depart from her fol. 21 Fiammetta her aunswer againe wherewith she laboureth to withdrawe him from his resoulte iourney fol. 22 Panphilus dooth sweare neuer to bee any other womans then Fiammettaes fol. 25 Sundry spéeches vsed of them both the day and night before his iourney fol. 26. 27 In what plight Fiammetta remained after his departure fol 28. 29 The third booke Diuers perplexed thoughts of Fiammetta fol. 30 Fiammetta by a letter that Panphilus sent her augmenteth her hope of his returne fol. 31 The great iealousie and amorous suspicions of Fammetta fol. 32 Fiammetta counting the dayes and noting the season and course of the yéere dooth afflict her selfe fol. 34 A certaine custome and manner of them that loue fol. idem Fiammetta dooth spend the nightes in vigilles gazing on the moone and diuers other thinges continually fixing Panphilus in her thoughts fol. 35 Fiammetta dooth blame the moone accusing her of too great slownesse in her course fol. idem A short discourse of Fiammetta pertaining to Astrologie fol. idem Fiammetta hath diuers meanes to passe away the long daies and nightes with lesse annoy fol. 36 Fiammetta her imagination thinking that she is with her Panphilus fol. idem The force of a dreame fol. idem What Fiammettaes thoughtes were after the promised terme of Panphilus his returne was past fol. 39. 40 The fourth Booke Fiammetta dooth vnderstande by a certaine Marchaunt that Panphilus is maried in his owne country fol. 43 Fiammetta beléeuing the newes to bee true dooth lament and bewayle with her selfe fol. 44 Her hope of seing Panphilus againe being extinct loue desire encreasing more and more dooth blame her selfe for vsing certaine wordes in her anger against him fol. 49 Fiammetta her prayers to Venus fol. 50 The hard condition of Fiammetta fol. idem The praise and properties of sléepe inuoked of Fiammetta fol. 52 Fiammetta her husband perceiuing her continuall sorrow and demaunding the occasion of it cannot truely knowe it fol. 53 Fiammetta inuited of her husband to visite the healthfull and swéete bathes of Baia goeth thether with him but chang of ayre not applying any remedie to her amorous fier dooth augment it more fol. 53. 54 Diuers sollaces shewed Fiammetta by her husband dooth kindle a desire in her to sée Panphilus againe fol. 55 Fiammetta constrained to goe to feastes beholding her altered hewe and pale face in a glasse hath a certaine feare of her selfe fol. 57 The glée and mirth of other gentlewomen putting Fiammetta in minde of her passed ioyes redoubleth her teares fol. 58 And extraordinarie palenes in her face is a signe of an inamoured heart fol. 39 No looue so feruent nor beset with so many woes as Fiammettaes was fol. idem The exteriour heates ceasing the flames of looue are neuerthelesse augmented fol. 63 Care of the mind is a great annoyaunce fol. 64 Certaine kindes and excersings of fishing fol. idem Fiammetta her vaine hope to sée Panphilus againe fol. idē An auncient custome vsed in Fiammetta her Cittie to inuite Ladies and Gentlewomen to Lordes houses at times of theyr most sollemne feastes fol. 67 The praise of diuers young Gentlemen before whom Fiammetta preferreth her Panphilus fol. idem The manner of Iusting fol. 68 The praise of a sollitarie life and of theirs who doo inhabitte villages fol. 69 The prayse of the Golden worlde and disprayse of the present age fol. 70. 71 Fiammetta not caring to weare any more her wonted Ornamentes is of certaine Gentlewomen her companions reprooued for it fol. 72. Beautie is but a doubtfull and frayle gifte of mortall men fol. 74 Fiammetta her prayers to the Gods fol. idem The fift Booke One of Fiammetta her seruauntes returned from Panphilus his countrie dooth tell her that he is not maried but in looue with an other Gentlewoman there fol. 77 Fiammetta her lamentation fol. 77. 78 Fiammetta neuer looued any but Panphilus fol. 79 Fiammettaes husband perceiuing her to lament wéepe in her bedde and dreames dooth aske her the cause thereof and with many loouing wordes dooth comfort her againe fol. 81 Fiammetta with cruell maledictions dooth reprehend and condemne her selfe fol. 85 The Nurce with many reasons dooth studie to chéere vp Fiammetta fol. 87 A cruell and desperate inuocation of Fiammetta against her selfe and against Panphilus his new belooued mistresse fol. 86 Fiammetta dooth desire death fol. 88 Fiammetta dooth showe that the paines of hell are lesse then hers fol. 91 Fiammetta her Nurce blaming her againe dooth endeuour to comfort her fol. 90 Teares conioyned with beautie are of great force fol. 89 Fiammetta dooth meditate on diuers kinds of death to kill her selfe fol. 92 The reasons the Fia. forged for to kill her selfe fol. idem Fiammetta determined the second time to kill her selfe is intercepted of the Nurce and of her other women fol 95 Diuers Gentlewomen promise diuers remedies to Fiammetta fol. 99 The sixt Booke A description of Springtide fol. idem The misery of Fiammetta fol. 100 The Nurce dooth bring newes to Fiammetta that Panphilus is nigh at hand fol. 101 Fiammetta her prayers to Venus fol. 102 Fiammetta recomforted beléeuing that Panphilus is on his way dooth take againe her forsaken ornamentes and waxeth fayre againe fol. 103. 104 The Nurce dooth tell Fiammetta to whome shee thought was the right Panphilus was an other of the same name wherefore she dooth returne to her former woes fol. 107 The contents of the seuenth Booke Two occasions moouing Fiammetta to sustaine her amorous paines with lesse gréefe fol. 109 Fiammetta compareth her paines with the gréefes of many other infortunate loouers and findeth none equall with hers fol. 110 Io belooued of Iupiter transformed into a fayre Heyforde after many sustained and passed trauelles became at the last Quéene of Egipt fol. 109 Biblis Mirrha and Canace came to diuers sharpe and cruell endes fol. 110. This be Dido Heroe fol 110. 111 Sir Tristram Isotta Phedro Laodamia Argia and others fol. 111 Iocasta Hecuba Sophonisba and others fol. 112 Cornelia first Crassus his wife and afterwards Pompey his Spouse fol. 115 Cleopatra Quéene of Egipt fol. 116 Cyrus Craesus and others fol. 117 Theistes Tereus and Lycurgus fol. 117. 118 Atalanta mother of Parthenopaeus fol. idem Vlisses fol. 117 Hipsiphile Medea Oenone and Ariadne fol. 118 Fiammetta her spéech to her booke fol. 121 The ende of the table Il faite bon fin qui meurt pour bien aymer Il decimo l' Anno terzo d' Aprile 1587.
that my paynes were annoyous to me without compare But many greater offences committed in tymes past and daily practised by others made mée in respect of them seme but innocent and the consideration of those paynes which others endured although I beléeued that none passed the lyke gréefe as I dyd séeing my selfe not to bée the first nor one alone dyd so worke in my vnderstanding that I became the stronger to suffer my owne The which I pray the Goddes determine with hasty death or else driue them away with Panphilus his spéedy returne Thus therefore pittilesse Fortune for this kinde of lyfe or rather for a worse then this hath lefte mée but small comforte as you pittifull Ladyes haue heard Which consolation vnderstand it not such that it was able to make mée forget my sorrow as others commonly are wont to doo for this dyd but onely stoppe my teares ready to fall out of mine eyes and did sometimes indéede dissolue my sighes into nothing without afording me neuerthelesse any other benefit Prosecuting therefore the pittifull history of my painefull lyfe I saye that heretofore with many other young gentlewomen adorned with singuler beautie I was neuer wont to omitte any great feast in our Cittie or which was celebrated in our diuine temples the which solemnities feasts and triumphes without my presence the cōpany did account but little worth thought them lesse beautified Which times appointed for thē my waiting women duely knowing to be at hand were very diligent to solicite and put me in minde of them and others of my maides also obseruing their olde order in laying forth and making ready my noble garmēts sometimes said to me with what gown may it please you good Madam to adorne your selfe For the solemnitie of such a feast is to be celebrated this day in the temple which dooth attend your comming for the onely beutifying and accomplishment of it To whom alas I remember that sometimes with an angry voice austere countenance turning furiously to thē againe A troubled minde careth not to goe braue no otherwise then a tusky Beare dooth to a company of barking Curres I answered saying Packe hence the vylest parte of my house and carry away these ornamentes from my sight A simple poore garment is most fitte to couer this miserable bodie nor let not me héere you any more talke of temples feastes and sollemnities if you estéeme of my fauour at all Oh how many tymes dyd I yet perceiue well enough that those temples were visited of many noble personages who came thether rather to se me thē for any great deuotion not espying me there gréeued as it were in mind went from thence againe generally affirming that the feast was dishonoured and not to be called a feast without my presence there But although that I refrayned thus from them yet sometimes entreated and constrayned I must néedes in companie of other noble Ladyes my acquaintaunce and companions goe to them with whome but simply apparelled in my ordinarie holiday attyre vnwillingly the Goddes knowe I went thether And there dyd not looke for any sollemne and high place as I was wont to doo but refusing the honours offered vnto mée I humbly betooke my selfe to the lowest places amongst other gentlewomen of meaner calling and degrée And there harkening to manie spéeches sometimes of one and sometimes of an other which secrete gréefe as well as I could I passed away the tyme that I stayed there Howe many times alas did I héere them that sat néerest vnto me talke of mée saying Oh what a great maruaile is it to sée this young Gentlewoman the singular ornament of our Cittie become now of late of so demisse an abiect a minde What diuine spirit hath inspired her Where are her noble robles Where are her high and stately countenaunces And whether are her rare and surpassing beauties fledde To which words if lawfully I might I would haue answered All these things with many other more deerer to me then these Panphilus ah my iniurious Panphilus hath caryed away wyth him And compassed about there with many Gentlewomen and importunatlie vrged with many questions with a fayned chéere and countenance of necessity I must satisfy them all But one of the Gentlewomen amongst the reste with these stinging words beganne to mooue mee saying Thou makest me Lady Fiammetta and manie other Gentlewomenne more neuer cease to maruaile at thée not knowing what suddaine occasion hath mooued thée to forsake thy riche attire thy Iewels gemmes and ornamēts and many other thinges so commendable and beséeming thy yonge yéeres and which wee knowe were once most precious vnto thée Being yet but in the florishing prime of thy age thou shouldest not put on this graue apparrell and these vncouth Habits Doost thou think that letting thy youthfull time passe thou canst call it backe againe Vse thy yéeres therefore according to their properties and nature Yeeres ought to be vsed according to their qualitie This homly and honest cloathing which thou hast put on may perhaps héereafter serue thy turne better And as thou séest héere euery one of vs elder and grauer then thy selfe with curious and skilfull hand adorned and with honourable and costly garments attyred with such oughtest thou Fiammetta to be set forth and beautified To her and to many other also expectinge what I would say with an humble and lowe voice I made this answere Gentlewoman and you the rest of my fréendes we come to these holie places either to please the Gods or els to please men If to please the Goddes the mind adorned with vertue is sufficient and it doth not import whether the body be clothed with silke or sackcloth If to please men for as much as most of them are blinded with false opinions and by the exterior parts lineaments of the body coniecture the inward disposition of the mind I confesse that the apparrell vsed sometimes of me and nowe of you is very requisite But this is now my least care my chiefest desire consisting rather in a sorrowfull repentance of my passed vanities which béeing most willing to amende in the sight of Gods and menne by this apparrell and in other things els I make my selfe as much as I can contemptible to the world and displeasaunt to your nice eyes At which wordes the teares of inwarde trueth violentlye expressed foorth bathed my sorrowfull visage and therefore thus I beganne to say softly to my selfe O yée pittifull Gods the serchers of all our harts let not these vntrue words vttered by my lying tongue be imputed to me for a sinne which not of a malicious will and flatte hipocrisie to deceiue thē but of méere necessitie to dissemble my gréefe and couer the cause of it from them I was constrained to vse as a holy and godlie excuse But let them rather be meritorious vnto me since that in concealing from thy people an euill and scandalous example in lue therof by these fayned wordes I
and howe doost thou knowe them to be true ah tell me quickly because if they séeme probable in my iealious and doubtfull minde I may reioyce my selfe with the happy vtteraunce swéete accentes of them And rising from the place where I was a little gladder then before and somewhat chéered in minde I sat néerer to the Nource and then she sayd Rysing this morning very earlie about my proper busines which lay néere to the Sea shoare earnestly musing on them I went with a softe and slowe pace with my backe turned towardes the Sea when a certaine young Gentleman leaping a shoare out of a late arriued shippe vnaduised caryed by the force of his skip dyd boysterously and as after I perceiued against hys will fall against me Wherefore I coniuring the Gods and with great choller turning towards him to blame him for this receiued iniurie with humble wordes he méekely craued pardon at my handes But earnestly looking on him and marking well his habitte I iudged that he came from the coastes and countrie of thy belooued Panphilus and therefore sayd to him Gentleman as the Goddes may be fauourable vnto you of curtesie tell mée if you come from any forraine country Yes good woman that I doo sayd he againe Then sayd I. Tell mée from whence good Sir if it please you And he sayd from the coastes of Hetruria and from the most noble Cittie in the same I lately came and of which I am As soone as I heard this I then knew him to be Panphilus his countriman Wherefore I asked him if he knewe Panphilus and what was become of him And he aunswered that hee dyd knowe hym very well and reported many good thinges to me in prayse and commendation of hym and besides this sayde that hée had now come with hym if a lyttle businesse hadde not stayed hym there but that without al doubt in a fewe dayes after he would come thether In the meane while that we were thus talking all hys companions that came belike with hym leaping on shore and ready to depart he went away with them I leauing aparte al other busines with the greatest hast I could thinking that I shold not haue liued so long vntill I had told thée of it came heather breathlesse and panting as thou séest Wherfore liue now merrily once againe and exile these sadde thoughtes Which thinges when she had spoken with a most glad and ioyfull countenaunce I kissed her olde forheade and yet with a doubtfull minde I many times afterwads coniured her and did aske her againe if these newes were true wishing euer in minde that she should not tell the contrary and doubting least she had deceiued me The manner of those that doubt But after that manie tymes with holy othes she dyd sweare that she had told me nothing more then trueth although that I and No wente wauering vp and downe my suspitious head like a gladesome woman with these spéeches I rendered immortall thankes to the Gods saying O supreme Iupiter most royall rectour and maiesticall soueraigne of the high heauens O luminate and radiant Apollo from whom nothing is hidde O gratious Venus and most pittiful of thy subiects O sacred Boy carrying the golden and swéete dartes be yée all praysed togeather and with equall honour magnified Whosoeuer perseuereth in your hope cannot perrish in his long and doubtfull trauels Behold by your fauourable mercies and not by my merits my desired Panphilus dooth returne whom I shall not so soone sée but that your alters heretofore visited of mée with most lamentable and pittifull prayers and washed with bitter teares shall now with my obsequious handes be perfumed with most swéete odours and precious incense And to thée Fortune full of pittie turning now thy wrathfull face away from my manifolde euilles will I presently giue and erect the promysed image with testimony of thy néedefull and imparted benefits But most humbly obtesting you all with that humility and deuotion which may make you most exorable that you would deygne to take away all vnlucky occurrentes possible to hinder my Panphilus in his determined iourney and to conducte him hether as safe and sound as euer he was héeretofore My prayers finished no otherwise then an vnhoodded Faulcon rousing my selfe vppe togeather and clapping my handes I beganne thus to say O amorous brestes weakned with long consuming sorrowes cast away from hence foorth all pinching cares since that my déere loouer remembring me againe dooth now returne according to hys promise Driue away sorrowe harbour no feare and shake of the great shame that dooth abound in afflicted and despised thinges nor as Fortune hath heretofore guided you presume not to entertayne any more gréeuous thoughtes but dissolue now into nothing the darke clowdes of cruell destinies and let euery semblaunce and thought of my miserable times depart now from me let my merry and pleasaunt countenaunce returne againe be made capable to reioyce at this present felicitie and let olde Fiammetta with her ruinated soule be altogeather blotted out of my memorie Whilest ioyfullie I spake these wordes with my selfe my hart beganne yet to doubt I know not what and a sodaine searching colde being ignoraunt of the cause therof did ouer runne all my body so that it countrechecked my will readie to reioyce my minde Wherefore I remayned a good while as one astonyed in the very middest of my spéech Miserable men neuer beleeue gladsome thinges Alas that this inconuenience and faulte dooth haunt miserable and afflicted soules That they cannot dispose and frame them selues to giue credence to ioyfull things apparaunt almost and told them for theyr good and comforte And admitte that their happy fortune returne againe it is irkesome neuerthelesse vnto them to be merry at all but beléeuing it as a dreame they slenderlie passe it away as though it were not indéede Wherfore lyke one halfe amazed with my self I beganne to say Who called me backe againe or what forbadde me from my new commenced ioy What dooth not Panphilus returne Truely yes Who dooth therefore commaund me to mourne againe There is no way nowe left nor do I sée any occasion to new make me fall into my olde sadnesse Who dooth therefore for byde mée to decke my selfe with newe flowers and to adorne my fine body with rich robes Alas I knowe not and yet I am forbidden I knowe by some secrete suggestion of sorrowe and relique of hidden gréefe of which my soule is not yet cléerely purged And standing on these doubtfull poynts and in this sort against my will as though I had not béene in my selfe in the middest of all my doubtfull errours great store of teares fell from my eyes and in the chéefest of my new mery moode my accustomed lamentations abruptly disturbed it And thus my long afflicted hart dyd by the euer running conduites of my eyes send foorth her woonted wastfull teares Signes of a minde deuining of thinges to come And my vnconstant
more wretched then he to whō he dooth beare it then of all the forenamed personnes I am the most miserable and vnhappie woman Because I doo greatly emulate and not a little enuie theyr ordinarie accidentes accounting them not so gréeuous nor so full of such great miserie as mine are Behold therefore gentle Ladies how by the olde deceites of iniurious fortune I breath a most wretched woman And besides this she hath doone by me no otherwise then a candle burned to the snuffe doo cast vp flashes of greater light since that in apparance onely making truce with my gréefs and giuing some pawse to my dailie woes and a little case to my tormented minde but by her cruell despit againe returning afterwardes to my former teares and to my sorrowfull taske of all the wretched women that liue shee hath made mee the most miserable and the onely receptacle of all dyspayre and dole And because all other comparisons layd aside with onely one I may endeuour to make you more assured of my newe euilles I affirme gentle Ladies and tell you with that grauitie that other miserable women my compeeres may affirme greater that my paines are at this present so much the more greater then they were before theyr vaine and frustrat ioy by how much the second feuers assailing the sicke patientes with equall colde and heate are wont to annoy them recouered once and now fallen downe againe more then the first The second feuers hurt more then the first And because I may rather heape pittie in your mindes with the imagination of the rest of my paines then fill your deintie eares full of new wordes tendring your wearied spirits with pittie that I haue of your patience minding nowe not to bée more tedious vnto you and not to drawe foorth your teares any furder in length if there be any of you at the least that in reading of it haue perhappes shed or yet doo powre foorth any And not to spend the time any longer in wordes which calleth mee backe to teares I am determined to holde my peace making it manifest vnto you that there is no more comparison of my shadowed discourse to those substantiall dollours which I féele indéede then there is of painted fier to that which dooth burne indéede The which I pray all the Goddes that eyther by your meritorious prayers or else by my earnest and effectuall orisons they would with some licour of comforte extinguish or with spéedy death quite abolish Or else with the ioyfull retourne of my Panphilus asswage and moderate the same The ende of the seuenth booke ⧠Fiammetta speaketh to her Booke ANd thou my little Booke drawen out as it were from the sepulture of thy Ladie art now as it hath pleased me come to an ende with a most carefull troublesome and tyred foote euen such as thou art nowe written by mine owne handes and with my falling teares in most places defaced before the inamoured Ladies and wanton Gentlewomen present and offer thy selfe And if pittie béeing thy guide as I doo most assuredly hope it will be they shall willingly looke on thée and if Loue hath not changed his Lawes since I became a miserable Louer let it bee no shame for thée in so vile a habite as I sende thée to goe to euery Ladie and Gentlewoman of what honor and degrée soeuer she bee so that they deigne to giue thée friendly entertainement Thou néedest not any other habit since I thought this most fitting thy effects Considering that thou must be content to figurate my life my selfe and my times which béeing most vnfortunate make thée apparrailed with misery as me appalled with mishap Wherfore take thou no care for that which other bookes whose subiects are contrary to thine are wont to haue which are sumptuous couerings garnished with curious and costlye works depainted and beautified with sundry faire colours pollished with fine shauings laid on with embrodered knots of Gold and siluer or els bearing high stiles and glorious titles These I say are not beséeming the sadde and heauye plaints which thou doost carry in thy forehead Leaue these aside my woefull Booke and the great margines also and ruled spaces the braue kindes of coloured ynkes and the great carracters placed in the beginning of happy Bookes which onely sing of myrth glory ioy and blisse It dooth become thée best with torne and ruffled leaues and tached full of blots and blurres to goe thether and to those to whom I send thée and with ringing my distressed mishappes into the eares of them that shall reade thée to awake and styrre vppe their harts to holye pittie and due compassion of them Of which pietie if by thy suggestions they expresse and shewe forth any outward signes in their faire and beautiful visages then bée not thou slacke to render them as well as thou canst immediate and immortall thankes for their pittifull dueties towards thée Why thou and I are not reduced to such a miserable condition nor are not so heauilie disgraced of cruell Fortune that these requitals shoulde séeme so great but that we may and can well aforde them Nor can shee take this priuiledge from any wretched Woman that is to set her selfe foorth as a president of mishap and to giue approoued examples of misery to those It auaileth much to take heede by others examples which liue in happines because they may in their golden felicities and in their prosperities vse a moderate meane and so temperate their pleasures that they fal not into that confused laborinth of loue and into that miserable estate of life as I haue doone Which kind of life bothe ledde and lothed of mee so plainly as I know thou canst well doo and so perticulerly lay open before them that if in their wilye loues they are but any thing warie and but meanely wise by feare of our sustayned harmes they may be well aduised and forewarned in obuiating the secrete and subtill deceites of yong Menne Goe therfore But whether a hastie or slowe pace is fittest for thée I knowe not nor what péece of thée shall bee first sought out nor howe nor of whom thou shalt bee receiued But as Fortune dooth guide thée so goe thou on Thy course cannot be much inordinate Thy clowdy times doo hide thy shyning starre which if it did yet appeare furious Fortune hath so eclipsed that she hath left no hope of thy better happe nor argument of thy health And therefore throwne abroade héere and there as a Shippe without helme sailes tossed vppe and downe the surging waues carelesly abandon thy selfe and as the places require vse likewise dyuers and congruent counsels And if perhaps thou doost come to the handes of some one woman which dooth with so great content and happines enioy her loues as wee are moste vnfortunatly molested with ours that will laugh and floute at mine and reprehende them perhaps and condemne them for foolish and yeld toyes with an humble and patient mind