the infinite sea of terrours and tormentes whiche then he shal perceiue to rush vpon him he would not endure them one moment for all the false pleasures that his sweetest sinnes can afford Alasse wretch what shall I doe if I speake my sinnes stand vp against me if I hold my peace I find no mā to comfort mee Mourne O my soul drowne thy selfe in bitter mourning howle out and lament beecause of these heauy horrours which thine offences prepare daily to heap vpon thee thou being as vnable to repel the one as either to represse or repente the other And yet now thou doest see these euils see also if thou canst shunne them let no paynes bee too great no petitions either to often or too earnest to make prouision agaynste that daye trample vnder foote the vanities of this life shake them off as Paul did the viper into the fire lest they cause thee to shake Runne O runne vnto thy onely refuge Iesus Christ thy redeemer become as it doth become thee an humble suppliant in the lowest degree both of sorrow and shame prostrate thy selfe beefore his presence poure out thy teares at his feete make an abiect countenance and gesture vnfained messengers of thy distressed mind let thy words bee seasoned with sighes and bathed in tears so addresse thy suite vnto him Although it bee late it is not yet too late to call for his mercie wherefore shouldest thou be consumed in saying nothing As it is impossible hee should forgette the passions which hee endured so it is not credible that hee should not haue cōpassion on thee for whome he suffered O Christ O sonne of the euerlyuinge God in goodnes infinite infinite also in greatnes in power almighty in wisdome wonderfull in iudgment iust in promise true in workes holy in mercie rich patient toward sinners sparing when they do repent call to thy remēbrance O sweet Iesus for whose sake thou wert content to endure all the miseries of mortallitie hūger colde griefe pouerty contēpt scorn blasphemies bandes blowes the crosse woundes death and the graue And now O Lord where is this loue where are these mercies is thy goodnesse come to an end and will thine anger neuer againe be appeased If I be full of impietie art thou therfore not full of pittie if I cōfesse the one wilt thou therefore denie the other if my sins are greater thē it is meet ar thi mercies lesser then they were wont if thy glorious greatnesse did make me draw backe wilt thou therefore draw backe thy gracious goodnesse O Lord my God althogh I am a sinner yet am I thi creature although I am a sinner yet am I redeemed with the blessed price of thy blood O Lord my life It was no goodnesse in me that compelled thee to make me but euen thy loue it was no merite in me that did winne thee to redeeme me but euen thy mercie why then sweet Christ and most louing Iesu let that loue whiche compelled thee to make me compell thee also to help me let that mercy which did win thee to die for me win thee also to saue my life for thou art alwaies one neither is thy loue chāged nor thy mercy diminished Heare me O Lorde heale mee O Lorde heale my sicke soule which panteth at thy feete and is euen at the poynt to perish reiect not him whoe deiecteth him selfe let not the abasing of my selfe make mee seme base vnto thee enter not into iudgment with thy seruant but accordinge to thy mercies to the multitude of thy mercies put awaye mine iniquities Thinke not on thy hate against a sinner but think on thy loue towardes thy creature remember not thy iustice where by thou punishest but remember thy mercy wherby thou sauest forget mee as I was disobediēt prouoking thee to wrath regard me as I am distressed crying to thee for helpe Comforte mee that am weake heale me that am wounded raise me that am dead heale the infirmitie which grieueth mee thou shalt remoue the deformity which offendeth thee take awaie the wretchednesse whereof I languish and thou shalt take away the lothsōnes which thou abhorrest free me from my danger and thou shalte free thy selfe from thy displeasure O sweete Lord most mercifull Iesus Christ wee knowe wherefore thou camest into the world euen to seeke and to saue that which was lost and do not thou O Lord forget that which we vile wretches not only know but shal acknowledg eyther wyth trembling or els with ioy Thou camest to saue that which was lost and wilt thou see me perish in the view of thy pittifull eies in the presence of thy bowels of mercy Thou camest to call sinners to repētance wilt thou not heare them when they doe repent thou camest to seeke those which wandred to assemble those which were dispersed and wilt thou not receiue those which com vnto thee which crye after thee which call vpon thee Thou diddest not stop thine eares whē thou wert blasphemed and wilt thou stop them now thou art intreated thou didst not turne away thy face from those that spat vpon thee and buffeted thee wilt thou now turne it away from those that pray vnto thee O thou hope of my hart strength of my soule whether should I run for succour to whome should I resort but onely vnto thee who art the reconciler the redeemer the Sauiour of mankinde O reconciler whome wilt thou reconcile to thy Father if thou reiectest a poore sinner who condemneth himselfe calleth vppon thee if death shall deuour him who dispaireth in himselfe and trusteth in thee if that soule shall bee drowned in hell which acknowledgeth his owne wickednesse with feare and thy goodnesse with loue O redeemer whome hast thou then redeemed O Sauiour whome then wilte thou saue O Christ heare mee O Christ helpe mee or else tell mee thy vnwoorthy seruaunt O mercifull God tel thy seruant to whome shall I cry to whome shall I complaine who is more able to helpe who more easy to be intreated to whom may I flie more safely to whome more readily who is more mighty who more mercifull where may I bee more bolde where more secure O thou onely refuge reliefe of the distressed to whome no man sueth without hope of helpe forsake mee not now I call vpon thee for before I did call vpon thee thou diddst call mee and to the end that I should seeke after thee thou diddest seeke out mee Sweete Iesus I praise thee for this voluntarie guift of thy goodnes O let it not be vnprofitable vnto mee Finish that which thou hast begun and giue mee the thinge which thou hast moued me to desire Heare my praier haue mercie vpon me a forsaken orphane looke vpon the teares of my miserie Haue mercie vpon me O sonne of Dauid O fountain of mercie haue mercie vpon me let my soule be the sea to swallow vp those streames which flow from thee O
that thou shalt not die yet assure thy selfe this heauie houre this fearfull this dangerous this vnauoidable passage is not farre from thee euen in the fardest and fairest course of nature and may bee euerye houre by many vsuall accidentes both of violence and of sicknesse Thy continuance is onely certaine in vncertaintie and God would haue the time vnknowne because thou shouldest bee allwayes readie Awake therfore and watch ouer thy selfe looke vpon the pale horse and him that sitteth thereon whose name is Death prouide that thou be not sodainely surprised and die before thou beginne to liue Loose not the offer of occasion whilest it may not onely bee taken but offereth yea sueth to bee taken and if it be not now taken will neuer heereafter be ouertaken Christ yet distributeth the treasures of hys mercye the doore standeth yet open to all that will bee suiters for the same his nature is nowe as apte to forgeue as hys power will be able hereafter to punish The kings of Israell were not so famous for heir mercy among the seruauntes of Abinadab as the God is among vs. When thou didst sinne hee did spare when thou didst deferre he did expect when thou shalt returne he will eÌ„brace The bowelles of his mercie doe still ouerflowe neyther wante their issues to deriue the streames thereof into thy soule his backe was torne hys handes and feete were pierced hys side was opened throughe these holes thou maist see the aboundaunce of his loue at these holy holes thou maist taste the sweetenesse of hys mercy Present thy selfe therefore vnto him in all those humble behauiours which the consideration of his maiestie and thy miserie can possibly frame be penitent for the time past and resolue for the time to come and with as greate confidence as necessitie crye vnto him and say O Christ O eternall light O life of all thinges to whom nothing is soe greate that it can resist nothinge soe small that it is contemptible whom no man is soe good that he doth not neede noe man soe euell that he may not hope I beseech thee by the noblâ—st title that in my greatest affliction I can geue my selfe that I am thy creature and by thy onely name of comfort vnto sinners that thou art mercifull heare my vile voyce helpe my distressed soule and in the time of necessitie and trouble bee graâ—ious vnto me Behold O Lord howe my conscience lyeth queasomed vnder the multitude of my offences behold how I am borne downe wyth the weight of my owne weakenesse and doe not thou whose propertie is not onely to spare but to helpe eyther lighten the burthen or lay vnder thy heauenlye hand my soule must needes sincke downe into hell But thou O Lord hast neither delight nor likinge in the death of sinners thou didst dy to raise vs vp from the death of sin O good Iesu thou diddest redeeme vs when wee were thine enemies and shall wee bee destroied now wee are thy suppliantes thou diddest call vs to mercie when wee craued none and wilt thou denye vs now we are suiters for it through thy death wee were brought vnto life and shall we dy now thou doest lâ—ue O thou whoe helpest the weake wich a worde behoulde I come I call I looke for thy mercie hide not thy face stoppe not thine eare cast mee not out of thy regarde let it suffice that I feel mine own weaknesse and want least I should haue beene too proud in my selfe now let thy power and plentye appeare that thereby I may bee confident in thee O Christ the guide of those that seeke thee the light of those that see thee and the life of those that loue thee O sweete Sauiour what shall I say whether shall I goe where shall I seeke thee or wherefore doe I not see thee O my God if thou bee absent from mee where shall I seeeke thee if in all places thou art present wherefore doe I not see thee O infinite goodnesse passing all humane both search and sight thou both fillest and includest all thinges thou art in euerie place present without either seate or motion giue mee grace for thy loue and desires sake I beeseech thee to cast off the blinde burthen of fleshlye affections subdue my reason regenerate my will and purifie my nature lead my desire that I may seeke thee lighten my vnderstandinge that I may see thee for I can neither seeke thee without thou direct mee nor see thee except thou reueale thy selfe Gracious God I haue noe goodnesse in my selfe but onely to finde that I haue no goodnesse like a scholler who is come to that degree of knowledge to knowe him selfe vtterly ignorante but suffer I beseech thee some beutifull beame of thy maiestie to shine into my soule disperse the cloudes wherwith my conscience is ouercast melt the mistie darknesse which couereth my vnderstanding O thou who saydest let there be light and light was made speake the worde and my soule shall bee enlightened that I may playnly see thee and perfectly knowe thee and ardently both desire and loue thee O surpassinge light deliuer mee from the shadow both of ignorance and errour and consequently from the darkenesse of death swallow me vp in the depth of thy brightnesse dazell my eyes that I maye not bee able to see any thing but thee possesse all my bodily sences that my sinnefull affections or rather defections may finde no place but that I maye soe feele thee that I haue noe feelinge of my selfe O Lord of life allthough I am a sinner yet I am thy creature beecause thou hast made mee yea and made me againe both by redeeming and by often renuing mee helpe mee therefore whome of thy goodnesse thou hast fashioned let mee not perish in my miserie whom of thy mercie thou hast redeemed gouerne mee heerafter whome hetherto thou hast preserued despise not O Lord the worke of thine owne handes For wherfore hast thou created mee beecause thou wouldest damne mee It had bin better for mee neuer to haue bin made then to bee confounded in my owne corruption Listen O Lord to the crie of thy poore Orphane cast mee not off in thy displeasure and my distresse forsake mee not for thy sake I beeseech thee And although I haue in such sorte both defiled and defaced this thy creature that thou mayest iustly refuse to take knowledge of mee yet by thy mercies I pray thee wherein thou art more wonderfull then in all thy workes remoue the one and renue the other rubbe out with thy bloode the staines which sticke in my soule and then thou wilt knowe it to bee thy creature O Lord my God at whose presence all powers doe shake at whose becke all creatures obey looke fauourably vpon me from thy glorious seate let thy maiestie shine vnto mee through thy mercie bee not angrye with vs wormish weak elinges although we offend for thou knowest what wee are and whereof we are made Is not man rottennesse are not
obtaine Goe too then O sinfull soule enter againe into the closet of thy conscience turne ouer the books of thy accountes cast thy reckoninges set downe thy summes see what thou hast done and what thou hast deserued Imprimis for abusing many creatures in desieringe seeking and embrasing them aboue the Creator Item for blaspheming Item for swearing Item for lying Item for vile and vaine talkinge Item for couetousnesse Item for cruelty Item for pride Item for ambition Item for riot Item for gluttony Item for drunkennes Item for lightnes Item for loosenesse Item for lust Item for enuie Item for hatred Item for anger Item for vnquietnesse Item for frowardnes Item for obstinacie IteÌ„ for rashnes Item for violence Item for idlenes Item for sloath Item for hipocrisie Item for flatterye Item for curiositie Item for detraction Item for oppression Item for sclander c. The totall snmme is the manifest and manifolde breach of all thy commandementes The penaltie is eternall banishmente from thy presence intollerable and endles paines in hell fire Out vppon mee wretch alas what shall become of mee O my Lorde I know not what to do I cannot tel what answere to make and beeing now in extremitye both of danger and feare my cogitations trouble me my conscience tormenteth me euery thought is athorne vnto mee Nay goe on then a little further looke downe into hell before thou leape into it obserue there who expects thy coming and what shall bee thy entertainment O good God what do I behold in this infernal lake nothing but horror tumultuous and eternall horrour fierie chaines flaming whippes scorchinge darknes tormenting diuels and burninge soules howling roaring and lamenting woe and alas with a mad rage blaspheming God with a desperate impatiencie cursing theÌ„ selues tearing in a maner their owne substance and enuiting the furious fiends to torment them Here euerie part of the condemned prisoner hath both a ful and fitte charge of punishment without either intermission or change the memorie is tormented with pleasures that are past the vnderstanding with ioies that are lost the apprehension with paynes that are present and aboue all the conscience is griped with euerie perticular offence that the sinner hath committed which once were sweete but theÌ„ like serpents shall cruellye and restlestlye gnaw vpon him Neuer ceasing to rubbe into his remeÌ„brance how base were the causes of his calamity what warninge was giuen what meanes were offered him to haue auoided it how easilie he might and many times howe neerely he had apprehended the occasion and yet howe negligently how foolishly how madly hee continued in his careles course Further the sight is afflicted with fearfull darknes and vgly diuells the hearing with horrible and hidious cries the smell with poisonous stink the tast with bitternes of gall the feeling with sharpnes of fire A fire which as nothing doeth feede it so it consumeth nothing that it doeth burne a fire which hath no light to comfort but heate to tormeÌ„t a fire whose force shall neuer bee either spent or extinguished or yet abated but as longe as God is God so long shall it tormente the wicked and that with such vehemencie of heate that one droppe of water to bee applied to the scorched tongue will bee of greater valuation then a thousand worldes And besides these common tormentes euerie offender shall haue his particulare paines according to the difference of his sinnes either in qualitie or in kinde Of which paines not onely all but any one shall be so grieuous so intollerable as it is impossible for any mortall wit either to expresse or to imagine And yet shall no creature bee grieued at them and endured they must bee without any hope FIRST of intermission SECONDLY of abatement THIRDLY of change without which thinges not onely painfull but indifferent yea pleasant become insupportable FOVRTHLY of comforte but to the contrarye the diuelles shall vpbrayde them the damned curse them and the Saintes deride them LASTLY of end but after so many millions of ages as there are drops of water in the sea the damned shall bee as farre from eyther end or ease of their tormentes as they were the first day of their beeginning O intollerable punishment which no meanes can moderate no patience can endure no time shal end Is this O Lord the wages of sinne is this the punishment of wicked doers of whome I am one in so deepe a degree and is it meruaile then if my coÌ„science quake if my soule cleaue with sighes and if my eyes bee drowned in teares But where am I and whether am I carried whether do you driue me O my sinnes whether O God doest thou deliuer mee If my sins haue made mee that I am thy offender haue they also made me that I am not thy creature If the Diuell hath bereaued mee of my puritie hath hee also beereaued thee of thy pittie If thy iustice may rightly damne me cannot thy mercies possiblye saue mee and if I haue deserued the one haue I thereby also disclaymed the other O mercifull Lord do not so looke vpon mee that thou see not thy selfe regard no so my wickednesse that thou beehold not thy owne goodnesse remember not so the sinnes that I haue doone that thou forget the substaunce which thou hast made What O Lord is the sence of thys saying I will not the death of a sinner but I desire that hee bee conuerted and liue is this I will not the death of a sinner if thou reiectest a sinnefull soul if thou drownest it in hell that crieth vnto thee for mercy is this I desire that hee be conuerted and liue O gracious God whose word is a will and whose will is a power who doest promise nothing but that which thou dost purpose and who dost purpose nothing but that which thou able to performe suffer me I pray thee to speake with thy mercy mee I say earth and ashes suffer mee to speake with thy mercy for great are thy mercies towardes vs. Lord if thou wilt not the death of a sinner what necessitye is there that I should bee damned If thou desirest that a sinner should be conuerted and liue what difficultie is there that I should not be saued can the power and malice of the Deuill can the number can the enormitie of my offences either constraine that which thou wouldest not or hinder that which thou desirest No no my God the deuils tremble at thy mightie maiesty and if the sinnes of the whole worlde were ballaunced against the least of thy mercies they could holde no weighte much lesse can the offences of one wicked wretch sway thy Almighty and mercifull will For by how much God is greater then man by so much is my wickednesse inferiour to thy goodnesse Haue mercy therfore vpon me O almighty God returne delâ—uer my soule saue me for thy mercies sake for if thou wilt thou canst saue mee and in thy will resteth the strength of my hope Remember
thy deserts O Lord I confesse vnto thee that my harte is vncleane and that I am a man of polluted lippes wallowing in the dunge and stinkinge in the rottennesse of my owne sinne soe that I may iustlye tremble to appeare before thy glorious presence much more to present vnto thee thy pure prayses out of my defiled mouth But who except thou O Lorde can make mee cleane and what is pure which thou hast not purged Thee therefore O Father of life O Lord of light thee with all the forces of my soule thee most humbly most earnestly I do beseech heare O mercifull helpe O myghtye Lord helpe thy seruant whome of thy mercie thou hast created clense my filthynes lighten my darknes enflame my coldenes quicken my dulnes awake my drowsines reuiue my deadnes repaire the ruines of my soule enlarge the frame of the vnderstanding thereof clense it from all earthly corruption garnish it with thy heauenly graces that it may bee conueniently both fitt and furnished to receiue thee that thou maist make thine entrie possesse that which is thine owne both by creation also by redemption and that as thou art exalted aboue all creatures soe aboue all creatures I may honour thee loue thee and praise thee not with that affection wherewith my weakenesse is able either to doe or to desier but with that perfection wherewith in dutie I should and wherewith thy Saintes and angells indeede doe O giuer of life O restorer O preseruer O enlightner of life O most louinge and louely Lorde But what shall I say where shall I finde full praises to extoll thee my speach faltreth and my spirit faileth my tongue can applie no fitting wordes neither can my minde supplye sufficient matter I want wordes to expresse my minde I want alsoe a minde to apprehende thy merites I conceiue farre aboue the abilitie of my vtterance and yet farre vnder the dignitie of thy desertes Lord my soule is desirous to yeelde praises to thee for thy benefites but it is vnable to conceiue that which is worthy and vnwilling to vtter that which is vnworthy it is ashamed to sende forth woordes knowinge how weake they are for soe weightie an office without thy presence it can neuer attaine to any degree of thy praise let it therefore haue thee O Lorde that it may in some measure praise thee For what worthy praise can I giue vnto thee by whose goodnes I was created by whole mercie I was redeemed by whose power I am preserued and by whose grace I looke to bee glorified when I was not thou diddest make mee when I was lost and forlorne thou camest downe and tookest mortallitie vpon thee to redeeme mee thou a King diddest humble thy selfe to exalt mee thou wert sould to redeem mee thou wert wounded to heale mee and thou diddest dye to saue mee O sonne of God how hast thou abased thy selfe how were thy affections inflamed how large were the limits of thy mercie Lorde thou hast loued mee more then thy selfe beecause for my sake thou wouldest endure not onely a contemptible life but both a shamefull and painfull death And yet did not thy loue in this sorte leaue mee but thou hast continuallye soe followed mee with thy fauours as though thou haddest regarded mee alone and neglected all thy other creatures When I wandred thou diddest seeke mee when I was ignorant thou diddest instruct mee when I offended thou diddest correct mee when I sorrowed thou diddest comforte mee when I stumbled thou diddest stay mee when I fell thou diddest raise mee when I stoode thou diddest strengthen mee in my affaires thou diddest direct mee in my troubles thou diddest helpe mee in my dangers thou diddest deliuer mee waking thou diddest inlighten mee sleeping thou diddest watch mee sinninge thou diddest suffer mee and prayinge thou diddest heare mee Further thou hast annointed mee with thy holy spirit and giuen mee a minde to follow thee thou hast called mee by thine owne name and thou hast sealed mee with thy bloude vnto eternall life These and manye other benefites haue I receiued some in hand and some in hope although through my owne sinnefull demeanor I haue almost both let go my hold and lost my hope But what if by my owne fault I haue lost these graces shall I bee vnthankefull to him by whose fauoure once I had them Lorde I can yealde noe reason wherefore I had them but that thou wert mercifull ney can I say any thinge nowe I haue soe neere lost them but that thou art iust therefore I thanke thee beecause thou diddest giue mee them I am sorie beecause I haue noe better kept them and I pray thee that thou wouldest againe fully restore them For I assure my selfe that thy goodnes is as willinge to restore as it was to giue and that my weakensse is as able to recouer as it was to receiue Therefore O Lorde Iesus by thy precious teares by thy blessed bloude which thou diddest shedd for my redemption by the aboundance of thy mercies I most humbly beeseech thee saue thy seruant saue one of thy members though poore and feeble saue I saye a part of thy selfe Be as greate in pardoning those that are submitted vnto thee as in punishing those that are rebellious poure vpon my heart the sweete streames of thy mercies conforme my life confirme my faith settle mee in a right and vpright course and contynue mee in the same euen vnto the end The worlde O Lorde is wrapped in darkenesse whereby it is made subiect both to the pollicies and power of our most dangerous and deadly enemy who beeing the prince of darkenes is thereby become alsoe the prince of the worlde but by thy light his malice is discouered by thy wisdome his deceites are auoided and by thy strength his power is repelled Hee hath manye and verye greate thinges I confesse to laye vnto my charge but for thy names sake O Lorde rebuke him and deliuer me Drawe my desires aboue the pitch of his darkenesse raise my soule out of this myrie lake of misery which affoordeth nothing but eyther daungers or discontentmentes that this filthy lumpe of flesh onely may abide on earth but my thoughtes may continually attend vpon thee O sweete Iesus the way of health the gate of life the pallace of pietie of ioy of safetie I doe too much depresse thy benefites whilest I labour to expresse them for they haue not onely filled but ouerflowed the frame of the worlde But O thou who vnfealest the silence of the dumbe vntie my tongue that I may declare thy goodnes and giue my voice a power to praise thee for the same By thee O Lord the exile is reduced the captiue redemed the sinner is iustified the sicke are healed the dead are raised and the damned are saued By thy goodnesse wee are created by thy power wee are preserued by thy mercye wee are saued Thou diddest create vs without any neede thou doest gouerne vs without any labour thou mayest
not thy iustice and my desertes but remember thy mercies and my miseries thinke not vpon thy hate towardes offenders but thinke vpon thy loue towardes thy creatures cast thy seuere eye of reuenge vpon thy sonne but looke vpon me with thy eye of pitty O deare God hell is alreadie full and what profite is there in my distructioÌ„ Also many millions of sinners will neuer come vnto thee will neuer cal nor care for thy helpe so that if thou reiectest the repentant and sorrowfull sinner who then shall bee saued and whome wilte thou fâ—â—de righteous if 〈◊〉 iudgest without mercie When I was not O Lord thy fingers framed mee and thou neither hatest nor contemnest any thinge that thou hast made When I was a captiue of the deuill a slaue of hell thou didest send thy beloued sonne to die for my redemption and do not now I beseech thee cast that away which thou hâ—â—â— purchased at soe â—â—gh a price When I walked in my owne wicked waies thou didst patiently endure me mightily preserue me and graciously call mee and wilt thou not now beestow one louinge looke vpon mee Why then O louing God looke vpon thy beloued sonne behold what hee hath suffered of thy goodnesse call him to thy remembraÌ„ce for whom thy will his obedience did cause him to suffer Behold his bitter agonies wherein his bodie was sprinkled with a bloodie sweate beeholde his backe torne with whips his head pricked with thornes his face defiled with spitting behold his blessed body so strained vpon the crosse that all his bones might be numbred behold his harmlesse handes his vndefiled feete pierced with sharpe nailes behold his naked side strooke through with a speare behold the aboundance of blood which gushed forth of those holy fountaines which blood still streameth fresh in thy sight and now pleadeth for my pardon Beholde O gracious God how his feeling was possessed with paine his hearing with reproach his eies with scorne his tast with gall beholde howe his neck bowed his heade hung his breast beat how his sight waxed dimme his countenaÌ„ce pale his legs armes stiffe how hee groaned how hee gasped and gaue vp the ghost Behold the preist behold the sacrifice euen the lambe vndefiled gloriously imbrued with his owne blood Gracious and mercifull God by this thy sonne by this my Sauiour I most humbly beeseech thee to looke fauourably vpon me encline thine eares towardes me hide not thy face now my soule is troubled Graciouslie receiue the lost sheepe which strayinge from thy pastures through sinne and flying from thy presence through a guiltie conscience hee hath louinglye sought and ioyfullye doth bring vnto thee vpon his own shoulders Heare mee O God of all power turne towardes mee and let thy mercies accept his merits for full satisfaction of my misdeedes O infinite mercie thou hast sett vs a way and giuen vs a light thou hast threaned vs the paines of hell and promised vs the ioies of heauen now pierce my flesh with thy feare that I may auoide the one and inflame my soule with thy loue that I may attain the other Grante I praye thee that as longe traueilers are therby taught to loue their owne cuntrey soe my former errâ—urs may henceforth bee a meane to hould mee in the right path that beeing led by thee walking through thee I may come vnto thee and rest in thee for wee sillie wormes are vnable to enter into thine eternitie vnlesse thou who hast created vs doest guide vs in Saue O God who desirest not the deth of a sinner saue my sinnefull soule which flieth froÌ„ thy feareful iustice to thy comfortable mercies from the desert of my sinne to the desert of thy Sonne This O God is easie to thy power and vsuall to thy mercie and agreeable to thy will Such are the witlesse wilfull right as is the heedles flie Which kils it selfe hurtes his sight has hath her in his eie Sperate miseri Cauete faelices The death of Saintes is precious Psal. 125. Miserable is the death of Sinners Psal 53. The III. Deuotion The guiltines of sinne and the consideration of Death calleth the sinner to call vpon God for his mercy in Iesu Christ. O Most high most holye moste mightye most mercifull most good most goodly most louinge most fearefull and terrible God the Creator the renuer the maintainer of all thinges whome to know is to bee wise whome to serue is to raigne whome to loue is the life and happinesse of the soule behold I pore wretch to thee who art both rich and liberall I miserable to thee who art both pittifull and plentifull do draw neere behold a hunger-starued begger knocketh at thy doore open vnto mee O honourable householder without whome all aboundance is beggerie open I say thy mercies to my miseries and although I am not worthy to sitte at thy feast with thy sons yet with the basest of thy seruantes let me bee refreshed with some broken pieces that are taken from thy table Thou hast commaunded vs O gratious God to knock to aske and to seeke whereuppon thou hast promised to open to geue and to bee founde beholde now my sighinge doth seeke thee my teares crie vnto thee and the groanes of my payned soule do knocke at the gate of thy mercies behold Lord I am desirous to doe thy will performe thou I besech thee thy word And first O Lorde I acknowledge against my selfe that I was conceiued in iniquitie and borne in miserie but thou of thy free loue diddest cleanse mee thou diddest sanctifie me thou didst through faith on my part and mercy on thyne betroath thy selfe vnto me Yet I vnmindfull of so greate goodnes haue since with many a foule fact distained my selfe and dishonored thee not dreading thy displeasure whole wrath maketh the deuells to quake I was borne in necessary but I pluÌ„ged my selfe in voluntarie sinnes I made no conscience in offending thee feared not to forgett thy lawe Notwithstandinge thou accordinge to thy wonted mercies diddest not banish mee from thy protection but as though I had daylye and duly obserued thy will thou diddest bountifullye heape thy benifites vppon mee so much vndeserued of mee as not desired When I sinned against thee the deuill was readie to haue made a pray of mee I was content I was desirous to haue perished with him but thou O Lord diddest driue backe him and draw backe me not onely without either my request or knowledge but very much against my mind When I was in daunger of death both by sickenesse casualties and my soule was so rocked a sleepe in sinnefull securitie so burdened with the weight of wicked actions that it must needes haue suncke downe into hell thy grace stoode by mee thy power did preserue both my body from death and my soule from damnation I did offend thee but thou diddest defend mee I did deserue death but thou diddest preserue life I did not regard thee when thou
diddest safely guard mee I like a wretch eyther sencelesse of desperate did forsake thee and flie vnto mine enemie I did long I did labour to haue bene lost but thy care did keepe mee whilest I busied in vayne thinges neuer marked so much thy loue did seeke with very greate and gracious fauours to win mee vnto thee But as one that is sicke of a sleepie disease cannot bee awaked but by pinching soe out of this lethargie of sinne my sleepy soule neither vnworthie nor vnwilling to haue perished could not be called to it selfe but by some sharpe and sensible accident Heereupon thou begannest to runne with me a more rugged race laying many kind crosses vpon mee not onelye to bend my vnwilling but to breake my wilfull minde and to make it appliable to thy pleasure Thou diddest call mee out of the wildernesse of worldlye delightes wherin my guiltines would haue hid it selfe from thy presence thou diddest compell mee out of â—â—e high way to hell thou diddest take me vpp strayinge in the streetes to attend vpon thee thou diddest enter couenant with thy seruaÌ„t thou diddest stirre in mee a desire strengthen an indeuour to follow thee thou diddest instruct thou diddest enable both my vnderstandinge and also my power that to discerne this in some degree of duty to do thy will Yet I wretch that I am since my entrance into thy seruice haue either vngraciously forgotteÌ„ or vngratfullye remembred all thy benifites and haue not so esteemed thee for them as I would haue done a mortall friend for a few curtisies of course I haue forsaken thee againe and followed the right trace of the vnrighteous world thinking euery thing good whose euell I had not tried I haue prouoked thee I haue stirred vp thine anger I haue deserued thy displeasure I haue done euell in thy sight not ignoraÌ„tly but presumptuously not weakly but wilfully not fearfully but impudently hauing not onely lost the tender touch of conscience but beeginning to beare my selfe an offence beeyond the degree of my vile word in a brauerie of euell Alas how deepely hath corruption tainted my soule what folly hath not had his feate in my mind and left his footsteps in my actions Nay I haue farre exceeded the limites of follye noe man not banished from his owne wittes would thus haue bin entrapped thus entangled I should haue repented mee of my former sinnes but I haue in such sorte both encreased aggrauated theÌ„ that I haue scarce left eyther number for more or place for worse O my God what answere shal I make how shall I eyther excuse or extenuate this my relapse shall I pretend the slie subtelties of the deuell the fair-faced shewes of the worlde the pleasant perswasions of the flesh the woman gaue it me the serpente deceined mee Tush all these are baites for babes but I was come to a greater staiednesse both age in experience I was warned I was weapened I was instructed I was encouraged I shoulde haue vsed more warines to suspect more wisdom to discerne more valure both to defend my selfe and defeat mine enemie Noe sure I will neuer excuse him whome his owne conscience condemneth I had thy expresse word and will to stop me my owne knowledge to bridle mee I would haue disalowed those thinges that I did if any other had done them but my selfe When a mans memorie is the bill of his debt when his thoughts are willing wytnesses agaynste him when his feare is his goaler when his iudgment is his iudg when his owne knowledg conuenteth him there is little doubt either of denying or deceiuing credite and much lesse of making escape I I it is euen I that haue broken couenant with thee I haue abused my reason rather why to do amisse then howe to amend I haue falsified my faith I haue riotously runne after the vaine conceits or rather deceits of sin whose kindest courtesies are the allurementes of mischeife which like a be-mired dogge defileth with fawning whose kisses are of power to kill I haue receiued manye freshe woundes I haue renued all my oulde soares and what thou O Lorde by thy mercies haddest healed I by my madnes haue rubbed open in soe much as sinne vsed agayne hath made the pardone once granted to bee of none effect I may well say with Iudas I haue sinned but either name or number my sinnes I cannot O bottomlesse sea of miserie and sorrowe wherin I haue plunged my selfe allwaies sinckinge yet by the infinitnesse thereof neuer at the bottome which I am able neither to abide hauing the firebrandes of all furies within me nor yet to auoide beeing fettered therein with the cruell chaines of my owne feare Oh my soule full of wretchednesse ful of shame but fullest of guiltines accept no obiect but of sorrowe drawe greedely into thy minde all conceites that maye increase thy griefe bee ashamed nay abhorre to think of any comforte Loath thy selfe torment thy selfe and soe shall thou doe some thing well for thou canst neither loath nor torment a more cursed creature Alas howe is my soule abandoned how are all the powers thereof layd wast comforte is no more ease vnto me then is the handlinge of sore woundes I am deuided in my selfe how can I stand I am ouerthrowne in my selfe how shall I rise my desire is payned because it cannot hope and if it hath any sparke of hope it is rather in change then riddance of griefe Forlorne wretch that I am it had bin better for mee neuer to haue bin conuerted to grace then thus peruersly to bee diuerted from the same for then I should haue gon on in a sober securitie and my punishment should haue bin soe much the lesse as ignorance is beneath contempt but nowe I am not onely vnhappie but vnhappy after the falle from some degree of happinesse nowe the footestepps of ouertroden vertue laye cruell accusations against mee and make the hatefull comparison of vice more manifest miserable are they whoe lose they wott not what but more miserable are they whoe knowe what they lose O foolish reason how sharpe art thou to see thy mischiefe and yet how dimme how blinde art thou to foresee it O poore remnant of pierie onely soe much goodnes left as to make me languish in my owne euell O sinne the onlye fall of my iudgment and staine of my coÌ„science now thou hast sacked my soule now thou hast beaten it downe vnder thy tiranny rest thy selfe forbeare a while treade not vpon my ruins set not fire to thine owne spoiles And yet not so but do thy worst cruell and cursed sinne do euen the verie worst that thou canst the more terrours thou executest vppon mee the more shall I both loath and lament the seruice that I haue done thee the sooner shall I seeke to drawe my desires out of the mire of thy subiection There is yet left both time to repent and occasion to amend yet doeth Christ not only admit but inuite
destroie vs without any losse Thou hast giuen all thinges vnder heauen for our vse either necessarye or conuenient and yet diddest thou not thinke that enough but thou hast allsoe appointed thine angells to attend vpon vs to stande aboute vs to watch ouer vs to bee messengers for our seruice beetweene thee and vs. And not onelye mankinde hast thou exceedinglye both honoured and enriched with thy blessinges but the heauens the starres the earth the aire the seas the floudes the day the night and whatsoeuer else thou hast ordained either for the necessitie or delight of man are by thee renued and restored to the end for which they were created For all thinges were made for the seruice of man and man for the seruice of God but once they serued those who serued idoles and then they were without anie dignitie then in a verie kinde of death being diuerted from the right vse of their creation But now they are exalted now reuiued now they reioice to serue those who serue and worship thee O Lorde But why doe I confine thy benefites within the compasse of the whole worlde They haue prepared downe into hell they haue alsoe surmounted aboue the heauens Thou hast subdued the kingdome of Sathan thou hast broken the chaines of darkenesse and death thou hast loosed the captiuitie of hell By thee alsoe the angells expect a restitution of the breach which was made amongst them by reuolt of those which fell O singular grace O admirable goodnesse whereby mankinde is saued the elementes are renued hell is vanquished and heauen is repaired O beutifull O bountifull Iesu thou hast blessed al creatures all creatures againe doe blesse praise thee by thy holinesse they are blessed by thy happinesse they reioice by thy fullnesse they flourish O holy O happie O high Iesu how is my dull sight dazelled with thy exceeding brightnesse My affections laboure to attaine vnto thee but whether I pray thee doest thou flie the pursuite of my vnderstanding How exceedest thou the compasse of my conceite Tarry O Lord tarrie a while for my feeble feete which straine to followe thee hide not thy selfe from my dim eies which seeke to see thee haue pittie vppon my weake soule which wearily panteth after the sauour of thy saluation Reach forth thine heauenly hand leade mee Lorde lighten mee Lorde let mee put the finger of my faith into thy woundes let mee looke a little how thou hast loued mee Oh wonder of wisdome O miracle of mercie God made all thinges and God was made man God made all-thinges of nothinge and without man all-thinges had turned to nothinge God made all thinges of him selfe but God would not restore all thinges without man Hee was beegotten of God by whome all thinges were made hee was borne of a woman by whom all thinges were renued he was beegotten of God with out whome there was nothinge hee was borne of a woman without whome nothing was well O Christ perfect God and perfect man O sweete safetie O secure ioye howe wonderfull how worthy a matter how weightie is it which I doe beehoulde I am much delighted to see it and yet I scarce dare vtter it Let my sences bee silent for a time let the tumultuous cogitations of my minde bee quiet reason cannot shewe her selfe more reasonable then to leaue resoning in matters aboue her reach What was hee made and what hath hee made vs Shall I speake with ioie or with modestie houlde my peace But that which my hearte doth beelieue with loue shall not my mouth confesse with praise I wâ—ll speake therefore not with an high but with an humble spirite not to glorie in my selfe but to glorifie God The Sonne of God was made man to make men the sonnes of God If then hee hath made vs the sonnes of his father hee hath therby made him selfe our brother therfore our intercessor is our brother our iudge is our brother our Sauiour is our brother our God is our brother With what assurance then may wee hope what feare shall inforce vs either to dispaire or to doubt seeing our saluation dependeth vpon the will of our most louing brother With what securitie may wee flie vnto him with what bouldnesse may wee embrace him with what confidence may wee intreate him Our louinge brother will giue vnto vs the good which wee do desire and forgiue vs the euell which wee doe deserue hee will aske for vs hee will obtaine for vs whatsoeuer is expedient the sonne wil entreat the father for his children and the father will heare the sonne for his brethren Let the diuell then doe his worst to dismay mee let my foolish feare murmur as much as it will let them both vrge they re abiect obiections and saye who art thou howe greate are thy sinnes and where in Gods name are thy demerites I will answere with assurance I knowe what I am my felfe and I knowe who hee is vnto whome I trust Hee hath giuen mee his gracious worde who is both in promise true and mightie in performance hee will doe what he can for my safetie and can doe whatsoeuer hee will When I call to my consideration the inestimable both bent of his loue and treasure of his mercie then may I plainly both see and say as the seruant of the prophette did when his eies were opened they are more that stande for vs then they who are against vs. 2. Reg. 6. 15. The multitude of my sinnes shall neuer choake his loue I can want noe merites soe longe as hee doeth want noe mercies If his loue bee greate my sinnes are but small and if greate bee his mercies greate likewise shall bee my merites He hath registred mee on his backe he hath engrauen me in his handes hee hath sealed me on his side the whippes the nailes the speare haue surely signed his loue vnto mee they proclaime his mercie to bee claimed of all men they crie comfortably vnto mee that I neede not feare Hee hath displaied his blessed bodie abroade vpon the crosse his armes spreade to imbrace mee his heade bowed downe to kisse mee his hearte laide open to loue mee Into those armes of my Sauiour will I runne beetweene these armes will I rest beetweene these armes will I reioice I will sprinckle my heart with the bloud of this lambe and the destroyer shall haue noe power to hurte My sinnes greater then can bee forgiuen Thou liest Caine our sinnes can stande in noe degree of comparison with the mercies of God but soe farre as God is greater then man soe much doeth the goodnesse of the one exceede the euell of the other As the nature of God is infinite and vnmeasurable soe cannot his loue bee limitted soe is there noe measure of his mercie as the nature soe the goodnesse of God is knowne only to him selfe The sonne of God hath taken our substance vpon him hee hath exalted it aboue the heauens he hath seated it in the kingdome and glorie of
his father In him I haue a portion of flesh aud bloud in him a parte of my selfe euen now doth reigne in him a part of my selfe is alreadie glorified and as I doe nothing doubt of this his communion with mee in nature soe will I not distrust of my participation both heere of his grace and heereafter of his glorie for although I am sinnefull yet is not hee soe vnnaturall that either hee can forgette or will forsake his owne meÌ„bers Hee that dispaireth or distrusteth his owne safetie hee denieth Christes mercie and consequently hee denieth his loue hee denieth his truth hee denieth his power the loue of his passion the truth of his promise and the power of his ascention Therefore the more willinge hee was to suffer and the more able hee is to saue the lesse cause haue I to feare for when all thinges shall faile he will most constantly keepe his faith O wonderfull misterie O exceeding mercie euer to bee admired euer to bee loued wee were not worthye to bee seruantes and loe we are made the sonnes of God yea the heires of God and fellowe heires with Iesus Christ. Who but must bee amased at such bowelles of mercie who but will reioice at such aboundance of loue which when I call to my consideration the burthen of my flesh doeth not so presse me the weight of my mortalitie and miseries are not soe grieuous as they were wont Gracious Lorde what thankes what praise shall I tender to thee for this adoption where shall I get good wordes to set forth this thy good will Surely if I had the tongue and knowledge of Angells yet could I neither thanke thee nor thinke of thee as is it meete For thy exceeding loue proceding from thy meere goodnesse reacheth beyond all boundes both of vtterance and vnderstandinge thy praise Oh Lord is incomprehensible and then wee doe most praise thee when wee knowe thee to bee thine owne praise and acknowledg our selues vnable to praise thee But O sweete Sauiour whome none seeketh but the admonished none findeth but the guided I beeseech thee by thine inestimable goodnesse let mee not bee vnthankfully silent for these thy benefits teach me secretly in my hearte O my God teach mee thy humble seruant O mercifull God euen by thy greate mercies I beseech thee teach my hearte with what reuerence it shoulde thinke of thee tell my soule with what delight it shoulde loue thee giue my tongue some power to poure forth praises vnto thee correct my weakenesse erect my hope direct my desires finish the work that thou hast beegunne and bringe mee to the fullnesse of thy mercie I was dead and buried in sinne I shoulde haue rotted in distruction but thou diddest raise mee thou diddest reuiue mee by thy loue I liue aâ—d therfore I offer my selfe wholly vnto thee most earnestlye entreating thy gracious acceptance that wee may loue and liue together O Lorde Iesus I bowe the necke of my soule vnder the feete of thy maiestie and in the lowest degree of reuerence doe giue thee most humble and hartie thankes for these thy benefites I yeelde thee praise O Lorde although base and bare and farre vnanswerable to thy desertes yet something my weaknesse is bounde to performe namelye to settle my minde to beeholde and loue thee and to praise thee with wordes soe well as I can O amiable O admirable Iesu let mee loue thee allwaies because thou diddest loue mee firste let mee loue thee onlye for hee loueth thee too little that loueth any thing besides thee except it bee for thy sake allwaies and onely let mee loue thee beecause by thee onelye I shall alwaies liue O that my hearte did so languish with thy loue that it might melt the moysture of my bodie into teares oh that the bowells of my soule were soe enflamed with thy loue that it might consume all drossie desires and drie vp the verie marrowe of my bones oh that I were sicke for the loue of him whoe died for the loue of mee Lorde allthough I bee not worthy soe to loue thee yet art thou worthy much more to bee loued Therefore O louing Iesu doe not soe denie mee that wherof I acknowledge my selfe vnworthy that thy selfe be depriued of that wherof thou art most worthye Graunt O Lorde graunt I beeseech thee not for my desertes but for thy mercies sake grauÌ„t to my soule that it may loue thee as thou hast deserued Grannt I say that I may bee worthy to giue that which thou art worthy to receiue soe shall I bee worthy of that whereof nowe I am vnworthy It is verie much O Lorde that I doe desire beeinge alltogether vnworthy to speake vnto thee but thy bountie hath made mee bold I will speake therefore againe vnto my Lorde although I bee but dust and ashes I will speake againe vnto him who hath not onelye licensed but prouoked but commaunded vs that we should aske O Lord our God O gracious O allmightie God is it not better that thou shouldest freelye giue mee that which I haue not deserued then that I shoulde vnthankefullye not yeelde to thee that which is thy due the one woulde bee a propertie of thy mercie the other an effect of my iniustice Giue therefore vnto mee thy grace that I may returne vnto thee thy due bestow vpon mee thy mercies that I may commit against thee noe iniustice bee liberall vnto me that I may not seeme iniurious to thee giue O Lorde giue vnto my soule aboundance of thy loue which I doe iustlye desire that I may not be vnthankfull vnto thee which thou mayest iustlye punish Deare Christ I doe feele in my heart a weake warmnesse of thy loue but my prayer is that the coales were throughly kindled with desire and blowne with delight into a full flame O sacred fire how comfortablye doest thou burne O heauenlye lighte how sweetlye doest thou shine how desirous are they more and more to burne whom thou dost enflame how are they delighted whome thou doest enlightten Alasse how late haue I loued thee O beautie most exceedinglye both auncient and fresh and yet alasse how little do I loue thee wherfore I beeseech thee O Lorde by thy precious woundes from which gushed out the streames of our redemption wound my sinnefull soule with the dart of thy loue strike Lorde strike with the two edged sworde which procedeth out of thy mouth strike deepe into my harde harte pierce my sencelesse soule parte all the inner partes of my spirit that I may crie out but not complaine how I am wounded with thy loue O sweete Christ O good Iesu euen for thine intercession sake and for thy merites sake I beeseech thee giue me thy holy and chast loue and then shall I bee fullye furnished with all heauenly verâ—ues Lorde thou diddest loue vs when wee were thine enemies and wilt thou denie vs now to loue thee againe thou hast commaunded vs with our whole harte to loue thee and wilt thou not graunt vs abilitie to obey Heare O my God heare O light of mine eies encrease my desire and grant my request stop not thime eares against mee beecause of my sinnes Indue my soule with thy loue subdue my flesh with thy feare that I may allwaies thinke of thee ioyntlye both with tremblinge and trust Settle the loue of thee in mee and the care of mee in thee let my prayer come vnto thee and thy mercie come vnto mee let the ioy of thy happinesse remaine with mee and the coÌ„passion of my miseries remaine with thee Let my hearte loue thee let my flesh feare thee let my whole substance in this worlde ioie whollye in thee that it may enioye thee wholye in the worlde to come Amen Aut vbique aut nusquam liber pag. Lin. error corrected 49 9 my thy 51 13 path pathes 73 12 at them for them 112 7 my any 121 4 shall shalt 114 16 both age both in age 151 7 the God the God of Israell  4 heir their 153 7 resolue resolute 1â—3 11 goodnesse goodnesse 161 15 sonle soule  16 it it 187 14 ether either  16 occsions occasions 184 8 wheeein wherein 189 3 lif lift 191 1 for his merites for his happinesse to praise him for his merites 193 4 sonle soule 197 15 thert veat vtter that 216 2 the whole world the world  3 prepared pierced 217 11 beutifull beautifull 223 2 resoning reasoning